Just wanna share a cool moment that happened recently. My character got polymorphed into a rat by a teammate during a fight (party versus me). Everyone got pretty relaxed after that, problem solved, job's done, sighs of relief all around. My turn arrives and then I ask the guy playing the mage "hm.. so, do I have all the stats of a rat, or do I keep my Intelligence?" "You keep your Intelligence..." I then turn to the dm and ask " this here on the map, is that a pillar, is it actually there?" "Yes... It is" "Ok, so I climb the pillar, up to around 10 feet and then let go." (Already had the d6s ready) "roll for damage" "ok, 6, that kills the rat, right? So I ain't polymorphed anymore?" "Yes..."
Smart. That made me think of the time when our druid was knocked down to 1 hit point after he was forced out of his wildshape. The party was the druid, a bard, a paladin, an NPC rogue and me, a sorcerer. So our druid, as a giant constrictor snake, took 51 damage which forced him out of his wildshape and his character took 26 damage leaving him with 1 hit point. The paladin was out of spell slots and lay on hands. None of the rest of us had healing spells; the bard was an offense melee, and as a sorcerer and a rogue neither me or the NPC could even get healing spells (due to the world it's set in everyone is a human so no racial abilities either). It was then the bard's turn and she casted Polymorph on the druid. She turned him into a young green dragon. He went from being a giant snake to a nearly dead human to a being a goddamn *dragon*. Other things the bard has polymorphed us into when we were at low health and too far away from the druid or paladin (or they were out of healing) include: a green dragon wyrmling, a chimera, an earth elemental, a nothic, a fire giant, and a hydra. We have since begun to refer to it as "Kuri's Alternative Healing"
Yep. Also if you don't need verbal, somatic or materials components you could cast spells as rat (unless something says otherwise as long as you retain your mental stats you can cast spells). Polymorph normally makes you have rat intelligence though, but props for the DM and players for rolling with it because it's cool.
The party fighter opens a door in the dungeon and happens to see it is a room filled with orcs. Realizing that there were too many orcs to fight, he slowly closes the door and walks away. As he walks away the door starts to open. The player asks, "How is the door opening? They're orcs?" My response, "How do you think they got into the room in the first place?"
Okay I've got one. I once gave a bomb to a goddess and was gifted a magic item in return. So for context, this is in a homebrew game. I'm playing an artificer, but my wonderful DM has allowed me to change-up the playstyle. I got a custom set of traits called Idiot-Savant and Anarchist cook, which basically make me really stupid and childish, but I can build bombs between battles to use. It's a really neat trait with some fun stuff (For example, a bomb made with fishhooks that pulls 3 enemies towards the center of it). Now as for the full story, we were just transported to the edge of the Feywilds. Mostly this was because of us another a different goddess, but that's a story for another time. So we end up going into the Feywilds to get some bones of a dead god we're working with (Again, another story). Our cleric gets separated from us, so it's just me and the party warlock, who's patron is actually a Fae (And her husband). So after a bit we get to chatting with the Fae-Mother. Thinking for a moment, I decided to give myself a self-imposed will check. My character, Ashe, is really dumb. Being born and raised as a fire genasi in the Elemental Plane of Fire, he thinks that giving bombs is an amazing gift, so he's constantly wanting to give bombs to people. So I have him roll to resist the urge to give a bomb to the Fae Mother. I got a 2. So immediately my character whips out the biggest bomb he had on him, which casts fireball when lit. He then holds it up to the Fae Mother and goes "Oh you seem nice! Here, have a bomb!" So I'm sitting there waiting for my boy to be annihilated, when suddenly the DM tells me that she smiles and takes the bomb. Not only that, but she gave me Boots of the Fae in return as a gift, which let me cast Misty Step once a day. Now I'm a teleporting child-like anarchist bomb-maker. I love D&D.
First time I played Aberrant, I made a bored, overconfident genius with mostly psychic- and engineering-focused powers. Due to having an eidetic memory perk, ESP, Holo (a power that allows projecting illusionary images, as well as sounds with the right bonus), and a DM-granted power to summon popcorn boxes at will, I had essentially gained the ability to record an event mentally and become a movie theater, even without actually being there. This was used to its greatest effect when I watched an event where two PCs were trying out their newfound powers, and one proceeded to throw the other straight up in the air a few hundred meters (saved partially by an NPC that liked them, partially by classic anime pratfall-into-boobs). I watched this event via ESP and then projected it to watch with another PC and NPC who hadn't seen it, munching away at popcorn with a smug grin the whole time.
During a 5e Saltmarsh campaign (minor spoilers) the party’s Warlock went exploring the town during a few days downtime. After rolling REEALY high for multiple exploration rolls, she accidentally found the abandoned building that Xolec the Vampire is trapped in. She goes in the basement and comes face to face with him. Amazingly, she passes the save VS his charm. Impressed, Xolec talks to Warlock and asks her to bring him someone “pure of spirit” 2 in-game days later, she lured a child to the basement, cast sleep, then lowered him down via a rope. Flabbergasted, the DM changed her alignment from CN to CE. Long story short, where now fighting off a swarm of children who have been turned into Vampire Thralls, led by a very familiar Vampire Spawn.
Ooh! This reminds me of something that happened in the last session I DMed. It was my first campaign and third session as a DM ever. The players were all idiots and land pirates, no not bandits, land pirates. They wanted to put wheels on a boat and essentially be pirates that sailed the lands. So the party was around lvl 3 and as the geniuses they were, they decided to attack a noble's carriage. In this world, there was no max lvl (homebrew in beyond) instead, once you reached lvl 20 you could reroll a stat and stack stats and skills. I didn't want to TPW so I halved the lvl 7 guards hp and reduced their AC a bit, locked abilities, and reduced the number to 4 with one always protecting the noble. The party killed the first two just fine and the last two were at a combined hp of 50, so I thought I'd unlock their multiattack ability allowing them to attack 3 times saying something along the lines of "in their desperation, they unlocked grater potential". Anyway, long story short, they let the noble start running and it was 4v1 against the last guard who at this point had 1 hp. His AC was 16, so he wasn't that hard to hit, but this guy didn't go down without a fight. The players' turn came and they all took turns attacking him bot not a single one of the 4 hits. Now it was the guard's turn, so I had him attack the tank who was a cleric who thought he was a paladin. Attacks n1, nat 20. Attack n2, nat 20. Attack n3, 19+5 so it also hit. The only healer who had the most HP and highest AC (20) got 1 shotted thanks to some good damage rolls. Now it's the players turn, and of course, they all rolled below 10 giving the guard another turn. The guard hit one of the rouges and killed him as well. Finally, they get that 1 hp of damage done to the guard and he falls over dead. Rouge gets revived with some random shroom from the forest but the "paladin" rolls nat 1 on a death save and just dies. Rip "paladin".
In the forgotten realms, I was DMing for a high-level party, and entered the desert (the big one that had that ancient civilization in it? That one.) and I had ruled the place is entirely covered by an anti-magic field, as extra punishment by Mystra. One of the things they tried was to find the very center of the desert, and casted anti-magic field. I said if they rolled a nat 20, it will work. They rolled a twenty. I ruled that the desert is now an empowered magic zone. Spells cast there can be up to 12th level, because Mystra loves her creative problem solving.
Was playing a homebrew campaign in a world called the glistening sea. We were sailing on a boat on a journey halfway around the world and had been through some crazy encounters already. So our ship could use some R&R. We rolled for a midday encounter and our DM looked at his random encounters list. Suddenly he grinned wildly and said “hmmm okay. Yeah.” Then he began narrating. Out in the distance a gargantuan figure walked on the waves toward our ship. It was a storm giant who with a crazy smile identified himself as Neptineas the son of the Goddess of the sea. He wanted to help us somehow. But we had to say that we accepted his help. After much concerned debating and with much trepidation we decided to accept. He proceeded to pick up our ship and straight up yeet it through the sky, where we finally landed, skipping on the water, ship BARELY in one piece and roughly two days closer to our destination. Thanks a lot Neptineas.
Not a super long story, but a moment we'll probably never let the player forget. A while before the incident, the players went into a puzzle dungeon, and one of them came out with a magical parasol, allowing for a single person wielding it to have an infinite feather fall so long as it's open and unbroken. Fast forward, and everyone's at a mountaintop city, burnt to cinders by a blood cult. Sorcerer, tank fighter, and archer fighter are there, combating blood elementals. Tank is taking heavy hits, and archer decides to close the distance to take some of the heat off of him. He's on a raised section, and could get there in one turn, but would need to jump a decent gap to make it. He fails his acrobatics check, and falls, only able to survive by slowly drifting down to earth from the top of a mountain on a frilly parasol, while his tank is rolling death saves from having his blood siphoned out of him by the elementals. Fortunately everyone survives, but it's was a tough fight to begin with, and they were down one dps from pretty early on.
DM ed a short campaign , had a set of 4 “ Monks “ roll up in a Black wagon with a Red stripe . 1 had a lvl of Bard proficiency Acting 1 had a lvl of Rouge with stupid high charisma. 1. Had high Intelligence low wisdom meaning he was smart but didn’t act wisely. 1 had a huge Strength modifier and was a Dwarf with a dark complexion. Basically I sent in the ATeam as NPCs or rather there less impressive DND counter parts the C team.
I run a hunger games campaign and one of the trainers gave a player some really bad advice (we goof off a lot) and they followed it to a tee. The play an Aaracrokra. This was for the tribute interviews, they moon walked across the stage “smiling” (they are a bird so it looked like a scream) when asked if they would team with their cousin in the games they said “probably not I have no friends” yelled Pachycephalosaurus three times and when alpacas were brought up (this person makes some weird backstorys) they did a cartwheel off the stare and ran. This character does the funniest things.
Are an Anti-Paladin and a Blackguard the same thing? 4:48 I could swear I've heard this one before. 5:43 Seriously? What the heck? 8:47 ...Well, at least he went out with a bang. 9:12 Full Monty Python right there. 11:30 LOLing against my will.
I derailed a modern campaign in the first session. The plot was supposed to be like that Revolution tv show. (Everyone loses power, stuff like that.) I was an investigative reporter. Since we started in the city, I wanted to raid the stores for supplies. We could make up any store we wanted, within reason. I ended up leading the party to Bloodbath and Beyond. Later, we all bought pets, named them, and decided to deck out the van with cherry blossom decals along with armor. We spent the rest of the session naming everyone's pets.
I'm currently a player in a game, where I pay as a Satyr Bard - she's extremely naive and generally just shouldn't be out on her own. Another player, who's playing a very manipulative wizard, very early on starts being somewhat (ready VERY) innaproproate with with Satyr. However, she doesn't really understand what he's doing is wrong. Later he gets very protective of her and they have a very very strange parent/child relationship almost. He's started to warn her from always being so nice and that some people will take advantage of her - somehow, in her little messed up head, this have translated into him always having had her best interest at heart and even when they barely knew each other, he was trying to teach/procect her from bad men XD
I finally played my first session of D&D last night with some friends. Obviously there was some home brewing and I’m pretty sure it was a home brew world as well, but I definitely had fun. Only 20 I got all night was to stick my warforged hand in a fire to heat the metal hand to cauterize the gnomes wounds.
I was the DM in a home-brewed 5e campaign set in the Forgotten Realms. The party was in Mirabar, the home-town of Cankles, the loose, axe-swinging dwarf fighter of the group, and the evil queen Dagrila had a price on Cankles’ head. The queen had been torturing family members and friends in order to hunt her down, and the feud had gotten personal. To tell this story, I’ll also have to introduce you to another PC - Ace Gilles des Raise, a gnomish divination wizard who always spoke with a thick French accent. One day during a session, the Gnome Wizard announces: “DM! Dan (the dwarf) and I would like to try something.” “Sure, go ahead,” I say. The gnome wizard proceeds to cast sending to the Queen, and informs her (in his thickest French accent) that he has captured the criminal Cankles, and wants to bring her in and collect the award. I dutifully RP the Queen responding in delight and inviting the Gnome to the palace, cackling in anticipation of being able to finally torture and kill the hapless dwarf! Another important note: Earlier in the campaign Cankles had picked up a necklace of fireballs with three beads on it, and it had always been hanging around her neck. My friend Dan (Cankles) describes how he takes off all his armor and weapons, and sets most of his gear aside. The Gnome puts a set of manacles they had on him, and off they march to the palace as the rest of the players sit and watched in amusement, wondering where this would go. They RP their way through the guards at the palace doors, get shown through grand hallways, before finally being admitted to the crowded central throne room. Rubbing her hands in fiendish glee, I RP-ed the queen descending from her throne to gloat over her prisoner, while the gnome loudly demands his money. The Queen says: “yes yes, you will be paid at once!” - and goes back to gloating. It is at this point that the gnome speaks up and says” “Ok! Well, it seems as if you have everything in order, I also want my manacles back ok,” and he reaches up and unlocks them from the dwarf’s wrists. All eyes are on the pair with the queen in front of them as Dan (the dwarf) describes how he quickly reaches up and pulls the Necklace of Fire balls from under his shirt and tosses it straight up in the air. The air seems to go out of the room as everyone watches the necklace arc upwards, hit apogee, and turn to descend back where it came. “I grab Cankles and cast Dimension Door!” says the Gnome with triumph in his voice, “and teleport us out into the entry hall of the Palace!” The table erupted in laughter and glee. There was applause. I glanced down at my notes, then asked: “What SIZE is your gnome character Wade?” There was some shuffling of papers, then he awkwardly replied “Small”. “Well,” I said, “Dwarves are medium, and you can only take a creature with you that is the same size as you or smaller, so you grab at Cankles as you cast the spell, and find yourself suddenly in the entry hall, empty handed. Cankles, back in the throne room YOU watch as Ace suddenly vanishes a heartbeat before the Necklace hits the ground. Please roll for damage.” I have to say, we played this campaign for an entire year, and this was my favorite moment. The Dwarf and the Gnome DID make it out alive after the Gnome blew through half of his deck of illusions. The ‘Beholder’ that he apparated in the atrium made quite the impression, and the severely burned dwarf rolled really well on strength and dexterity checks as she barreled out of there, grabbing the wizard on the way. We all agreed it was an awesome escapade and everyone learned to read your spells really carefully.
We were playing a game set in Asteroth (warcraft). My character was a 10 ft tall troll barbarian named Trungan. I had a raptor mount that I brought into battle. An accidental mount smack later, I tried to throw the raptor at my enemy with my crazy athletics but failed that too and the raptor ran away. With a few crazy rolls I found a wild raptor and tamed it. We ended up doing through a portal and I missed a few sessions. When I come back the raptor is still tied up in the stables very hungry and angry. I killed the table hand and tried to feed it to him. People noticed, I went to jail, and lost all my money to my party mate who was a goblin lawyer. A few sessions later I removed a pirate captain's head and spine after tackling him through a second story wall.
I have two stories that involve the same thing as the DM; first one is that my players were fighting a very powerful being I made in a home brew campaign, the first player decided it was a good idea to throw the other player as a weapon (second was still alive), then on his next turn decide to floss, he rolled a 10, so I described the situation as that he floss so bad, the gods decided to punish him by damaging him; the second story is that my players (first is still the same player, second this time is a different person) were about to fight a vampire, so before entering the room, the second decided to make a grand entrance, I thought he was going to be intimidating, but no he wanted to be very flamboyant, he rolled extremely well (forgot the actual roll) so I described it as that he kick down the door, then entered so flamboyant like a model as if the universe wanted this moment to happen.
So I have a character who I originally just called "Spear Guy," (I'm terrible at coming up with names) as I use polearms. Funnily enough one of the other players gave me the name Lance to fit the theme, and I declared that my name is Lance Guy. Most of us got a good laugh out of that one. So the story. We had dropped down a hole onto a circular platform that had a seemingly endless pit all around and five pedestals about five feet from the platform (well specifically we landed on the pedestals). This was a boss fight, and definitely one that, if the dm had rolled better (he needs to sub), could have resulted in a TPK. Well, the dice were on the players' side, and I got enlarged after making it to the platform. I grabbed the boss and tossed him to the abyss. The dm had prepared for this (and if we fell off) by making it a loop that would safely drop anything that fell back up to one of the pedestals (like featherfall), but it wouldn't happen until the falling thing's turn. So dropping the boss only resulted in wasting his turn. It was pretty good seeing as what he was going to do got delayed long enough for us to get him and his lackey low hp. My next turn after he landed, I chucked a javelin at him, partially as a test. It landed on one of the other stages at the beginning of my next turn. We finally have them both pretty low when he finally gets to do his thing. He was casting Fear affecting the whole party. We all had to immediately run as far from him as we could... So I said, "ok, I jump." I already know that I'll just land back up top, and I have to get as far as I can safely get from what I'm afraid of. In character I'm thinking I might end up even further away from him depending on where I land. My next turn comes, and I land on the closest one to him. Still afraid I throw, and miss, another javelin at him and just flip him the double bird as I jump backwards off the platform once again so I could make a saving throw against the fear. I passed. Best part is I got the rogue to jump that turn too. Then the barbarian goes and finishes the boss making the 'featherfall' effect end, and we both just hit the ground on our turns moderately close to ko'ing one of us. Lucky thing though, I landed with my first javelin so I was able to easily retrieve it. *whispering to rip-daddy* I can't come up with a clever TL:DR, so if this gets narrated, just put something in there and pretend it's from me, thanks.
One of our favorite moments in the first session of a campaign dm: the dragon breathes fire and burns the grass around you to flex superiority and begins to fly away Druid: I call him an asshole and throw a rock (Nat1) Dm: you miss terribly however the dragon heard you and shouts “what you say you little bitch!?!?!?” Aaaaaand roll initiative
I've got one. I was playing as a kobold rogue, and I was ransacking a general store for shinies when the guard arrived. I asked the DM if I had time to throw together a disguise and still jump out the window to escape. He said yes. I rolled, aaaaaand, well, it wasn't a nat 1, but it was a 4, so it was pretty clear I was going to be recognized. I decided, heck, if I took the time to make a disguise anyway, I might as well have some fun with it. I asked my DM if I could do something ridiculous with the disguise, and he agreed, so there I was, a kobold with a mask and cape that made me look exactly like, wait for it, A KOBOLD! Yep. I was a kobold, in a kobold costume. I jumped out the window, and was spotted by the guard, who said, "Look, there's the thief! It's a kobold! Wait, no, yeah, it's still a kobold. What the heck?" I managed to escape the city with a few lucky rolls, making the whole disguise incident pointless, but it was still my favorite moment from that entire session. XD
So this is from my current campaign of Curse of Strahd, of which i am the Dm. The party was about to enter the village of Vahlaki, whereupon a new player came into the game. For flair, he appeared in a summoning circle in the sky. As the party looked up they saw a 3ft tall, cross-eyed goblin fell on top of the wizard. The Goblin, named Sydwinder, had a permanent -2 to perception (player wanted this added for Role play). After that introduction they made it to the city and Sydwinder went to find a blacksmith, had him roll for perception, he rolled a nat 1, which was a -1 with his modifier. So, instead of finding the blacksmith he finds a chicken. He then rolls an intelligence check (he asked to do this) and got another nat 1. Sydwinder now was convinced that this chicken was a god in disguise. The player then asks to class into paladin, I okay it, and now we have a goblin fighter with paladin who worships a chicken...funny thing is that it worked and now Clucky the chicken god of vengence is now empowering the cross-eyed goblin Sydwinder....I love DnD.
I got a fun story to share but it's a bit long. So this particular story happened when we just got back from our latest adventure in Saltmarsh. Unfortunately, half our group couldn't make it to the session so there was only my Aquatic Half-Elf Bard/Sorcerer - Ellamir and my friend's Human Rogue - Marius Bond. My dm didn't want to continue the story without the rest of the group so we decided to learn how to sail so we can hunt for pirates. Only problem was we need 15 weeks to have proficiency in sailing. That's fine, what's the worst that can happen? The first few weeks went off without a hitch. In the 4th week however, we received a letter that demands us 400 gp of fish and to meet us in a specific location for the transfer. We didn't want buy that of course so we decided a better idea, we teach them how to fish. So we sent a letter back along with a high persuasion roll to convince them for lessons. As it turns out, the one that sent the letter was actually a group of skeletons. So Ellamir and Marius spent a night teaching skeletons how to fish. We also got a Belt of Dwarvenkind out of it. A couple of weeks passed and we received another letter that demand 40gp or else they destroy the town. Some investigation rolls revealed that this letter was not written with human hands. After some discussion, Ellamir and Marius decided to go to the listed meeting spot, and with my Helm of Telepathy, cast detect thoughts. As it turns out, it was a bunch of crabs demanding money. These are not special or giant crabs, just normal crabs. We also somehow convinced them to be adventurers. We bought them crabsized gear and everything. One even has a little shield. They called themselves The Crabsaders. After another week, my in-game father decided to join an evil dark cult for some reason. Luckily, I rolled high on my persuasion and I managed to convince him that being in a cult is a bad idea and he should be ashamed of himself. And then on week 11, he joined another cult, AGAIN! IN THE SAME MONTH! Not taking any chances, I dragged my in-game mom with me so I could have advantage on my persuasion roll. Finally, after all of that nonsense, we finally completed our 15 weeks of learning how to sail. To celebrate, we bought a keel and took the Crabsaders on their first adventure, which is hunting for pirates. We even brought the skeleton fishermen along with us too. It was a glorious and fun time.
I’ve got an absurd story I put on a video comments while ago. My party was hunting a bunch of demons after we accidentally screwed up saving a kids dad from being kidnapped by cultists. While we were doing alright in terms of killing them quickly, we were getting pretty aggravated at how much silver it would cost to make holy water ( we begged the the paladin to get a skill to make holy water.) After ‘acquiring’ multiple alchemy jugs, we learned we can make mayo in them (our players have had a long standing with mayo and large black boulders for a few games now and was totally my fault.) One of us wondered how much water was in mayo after we decided to make another batch of holy water to put on our weapons. We found out that to make 16 ounces of holy water, we could make about 2 gallons of holy mayo instead. The next demon we faced DEFINITELY did not think that anyone would attack it with swords, whips, shields, crossbows and bolts covered in mayo.
Ah yes. I was playing waterdeep: Dragon Hiest, and was playing an assassin dwarf with the typical honor and respect thing that dwarves hold important, and (minor spoilers beyond this point), when we got the deed to Trollskull Manor, I slapped Volo, because he didn't keep his word. The entirety of the party, except my dad, basically went "DUDE WHAT THE HELL!! TROLLSKULL MANOR WILL GIVE US *WAY* MORE MONEY!!" Both in character and out.
The panda story immediately reminded me of the nutty professor movie starring Eddie Murphy when a hamster grows gigantic and shoots his "pellets" at cops
Don't have a Reddit account so I'm putting my suggestion here. Maybe you could post it? "What were the best ways you introduced a new pc after your other character died?"
I kinda wish I knew how to play D&D. It sounds fun. If I got to choose my character I would choose something like Raza ( from bleach ) a flower that took over who ever it flew into. Small hard to see and hit. It might be classed as some kind of fairy if I had to guess.
... UA-cam's way of guessing what ads make sense is typically completely stupid, but I just had one that was half stupid, half understandable. A Tampax commercial featuring gaming streamers.
My player made a deal with a malevolent entity that killed two of his friends just because one of said friends was particularly rude to it and also tried to kill it He did it for marshmallows In return it will ask for a favour ( he will cause suffering to people) Lucky his character likes that
I’m making a character and his backstory is that he got kicked out of his parents house for being accused of, burning down their very, VERY magic mushrooms
We were fighting a giant gargoyle, IN THE FIRST SESSION,got a oportunity attack, crit, slice his throat, he survived, WITH MORE THAN HALF OF HIS HEALTH, attacked back, hit, i die instantly
That invisible bugbear one makes no sense. If I hear an actual physical voice whispering in my ear, I don't assume it's my concience, I assume it's _a dude whispering in my ear_
4:12 "My players stole a key to a villa in the richest neighborhood and killed the owners, now it's theirs". Yeah uhh no. Go find an uninhabited mansion in Beverly Hills and pretend you own it. See how long until the cops take you to jail.
Goes into a town to retrieve a magical cauldron. Druid (me) is told to cause a distraction. I wild shaped into a donkey and had someone cast spider climb on me. A distraction was made. Tales were told of the unstoppable donkey that ended up stealing a magic cauldron before running straight over the town walls and into the horizon.
Same campaign, the party bought a donkey to pull our cart. I used speak with animals to talk to it. It said “are you going to free me from these stupid stables?” My response: “freedom is… relative.”
Two of my dnd group decided to take a giant out on a date, neither knew how to speak its language, and one of them was a 3 foot tall muse with an antimatter rifle on his back, the rest of them were captured and thrown in a cell, the one I was killed in a few games ago when I was kidnapped by hags in the ethereal plane, we manage to break out and somehow defeat 1 hag, the other got away, a spiritual blademaster, and the giant, all wothout weapons, my character went down 5 or 6 times, the last time he was unconscious, a cleric healed us all and was shot In the back, I, with 14 health, decide to return the favor and heal her, i forgot to take the arrow out of her back and she nearly passed out again
two part members tried to get across a lake that we were not supposed to go across yet. they tried for half an hour with an axe that had wayy to much knockback and a rope hitting one person who then pulls the rope back to get wacked with. we all got sick of it and the only reason they did not die is because the DM let me have a flying demon cheetah.
For me it would be when i made for the level 6 party an enemy with 1200 hit points made of tangible shadows, immune to not magic attacks, with advantage on shadows, weakness to radiance (for me it also means that the sun light and the heals can deal damage to him), that couldn't fly but couldn't receive fall damage because it had no weight. Then what happened? At first i thought i was too hard because 4 of them almost died on the first turn and i was ready to tell them that his power was temporary and they only to survive for a bit, etc...... but then the mage and the cleric did the unthinkable, one grabbed him with mage hand because he had no weight and i failed his save on strenght with a 1 and he had -1 in strenght because was a only a powerful warlock, so the mage dragged him around without a problem and the cleirc used his holy water to make one of the nearby bathouses as a prefect and relaxing place to swim...or drown a boss....yes what followed was basically 2 hours of drowning the boss and if he succeded in removing the mage hand another spellcaster used it or the cleric had a magic weapon in the form of a shield ready to push him in (the party was cleric, warlock, sorcerer, mage, ranger), in the worst case they were even ready to freeze the water surface to block him (and they actually did it) but is this the story? Not yet, there is one thing that happened that made it memorable! The beastmaster ranger (that was basically useless in all of this except for the fact that it took in the face one of the few spells the boss could unleash in one of his little times of freedom) that was at 1HP decided that he wanted to be the protagonist of the action so he tried to do an epic action when the boss was reduced at 6HP, he rolled acrobatic to run and then launch himself like a rocket to decapitate in samurai fashion the boss, and he did a Nat1, so i describe how he was naruto running at full speed but before he could jump he remembered that he was running on ice so without any means to stop the momentum he hit the wall, destroying it and leaving like in Tom and Jerry the figure of himself jumping and reducing his HP to 0.....we all almost died of laughter, the party killed the boss and saved the ranger that was almost dead with already two failed saving throws (his first saving throw was 1 again).
I am 100% sure that I already heard story number 3, paladin wants to make great entrance and kills himself because he keeps rolling critical fails, in one of your recent videos. Or did I just imagine that one?
Just wanted to share something that happened on my first ever campaign as a player.........we were a party of 4 and my friend was DMing and we had a lot of funny stuff happen a long the way such as when me ( a high elf wizard ) and our Barbarian tank ( which was a big black character as he wanted 2 be himself in the campaign ) had a fight because he wanted 2 steal some of my robe and he retaliated and nearly killed me with his ax after I hit him with a stick.......but thats not the funniest thing...... the barbarians name was Deldric which later became dildo thanks to this...... as we were walking along a trail we came across a trap which our barbarian got trapped in leaving him hanging by the ankle.....out DM then said that as he went up the loin cloth he was wearing flipped upside down and it was all showing......I then made a joke about it hitting out halfling thief in the face and from that moment on he Became Dildo the barbarian with an 11 foot dick which he used 2 pole vault over the trap
One of my first time playing D&D me and my friends were going through a dungeon that bottle necked to a small hallway when we were ambushed by cobalts as they came down the tunnel I decided to "ATTEMPT" to kick one of the two lava filled cauldrons over to burn them alive. DM says "roll a strength check" Nat 1 stubbed my pinky toe. Next turn the cobalt are closer this time i try to push it Nat 1 in my haste I break my finger I try again surely I cant be this unlucky Nat 1 my hand goes in the lava at this point I give up with the pot and fought normally later one of my friends managed to steal a warhorse from an enemy during our next encounter and decided to have me ride it for an advantage...big mistake I walked 30ft and manage to step on a trapdoor falling 30 feet down on spikes killing the horse and almost killing me. One fight later I managed to survive with 1 HP and were going to camp in the room with one door leading farther into the dungeon well I wanted to see what was on the other side of the door DM said "ok roll for perception." nat 1... "you try to put your ear on the door but in your weary state trip and slam your head against the door you take 1 damage and are now knocked out"
The party was playing a mystery and had found the bad guy. Since he was seen by the town as an important and respected man, they had gotten him out of town to question him about his accomplish. However, the party could not get him to tell who his accomplish was. They decided to go back to town to find more evidence and the other accomplish, they did not have any rope (used it earlier to get some other information) and decided to use mold earth to bury him up to the neck and leave the rouge as a lookout, the player had to make a cigarette run. When they returned to the rouge who btw is a NE female feral Tiefling with a snake like tongue and demon wings who is super sexy according to the female player who likes bdsm, she described, in too much detail as she had the whole trip to think about it, how her character had been liking his eye with her tongue and other sadistic tortures things the character had done to the poor guy in the ground. They still didn’t get the information as the guy was to traumatize to say a word ever again, and her character didn’t want to try getting the information. Oh and we made a rule in our friend group that no one were to be left alone at the beach with that player.
In the last session we played in a campaign I'm in, our monk jumped in an Orb of Annihilation, AFTER he had already lost his hand to it. This players os the definition of problem player, he creates stupid characters with bad personalities(his druid was a pothead and his monk was an alcoholic), who are way too high level for what they actually were(we are currently lvl8) never takes the game seriously, only makes jokes and jumped in the Orb only because that would be a stupid death and he wanted to be know for those kind of things, sacrificing a character he apparently liked and actually had some lore this time just for a stupid joke.
While in Wyllowwood in the Dungeon of the Mad Mage, our druid tried and spectacularly failed twice to seduce Wyllow. I, the dashing rogue step up, crit on sweet talking her and proceed spend the night in her bed chambers, if you catch my drift. I rejoined the party the next morning with one level of exhaustion and proceed to brag to our salty druid.
The meal of infinity basicly everything is a shredded cheddar cheese and parmesan cheese ketchup and Mayo burrito. Trees? Ketchup bottles homes? Nah burrito hut. Castle? Hahaha burrito walls ketchup pillars. The king? Pile of shredded cheese the NPCs ha nope mayo bottle people. Our wizard is a burrito caster he made the f*ng map
reminds me of an old Beetle Bailey comic: "A company will reconnoiter the area covered by the banana blob, then move along the jelly smear and attack the coffee ring..."
I was playing a game which had jojo stands (we’re still doing it, we just don’t have a lot of time) and in the most recent one, they made me drink some water in the desert, and I fucking threw a lizard at where the enemy is.
Idk if it's okay to use Abserd as the cover,, especially without credit... I thought it was a new Puffin video and I got excited but this is definitely not Puffin
@@ArtifexAnimations I meant to be more cheeky than harsh but it didn't read that way. I often get the feeling that most D&D UA-camrs are pretty chill about most things. I guess I was expecting more Abserd, and was a little head faked.
PLEASE!!! We need a Puffin Forest guest speaker here
I see Puffins "Abserd" and click.
Same
Same
Fucking same. Didnt even check the artist name was co fused for a sec lol
I saw Absurd too and smiled, loved puffin's forest characters.
I wonder how Ben feels about that...
Hey look, it's puffin forest in the thumbnail.
Is the thumbnail ripping off his art or did he authorise this? Seems kinda scummy to reference his creation for obvious click bait
@@petermaximoff4598 he probably asked
Looks like fanart
@@petermaximoff4598 I wouldn't consider it click bait. its just an amusing reference to his character Abserd, one im sure hed be fine with.
@@tacocatpoopracecarpooptacocat yeah maybe, I just think they should at least show who made the idea/ original art for Abserd. That's all
Just wanna share a cool moment that happened recently.
My character got polymorphed into a rat by a teammate during a fight (party versus me). Everyone got pretty relaxed after that, problem solved, job's done, sighs of relief all around. My turn arrives and then I ask the guy playing the mage "hm.. so, do I have all the stats of a rat, or do I keep my Intelligence?" "You keep your Intelligence..."
I then turn to the dm and ask " this here on the map, is that a pillar, is it actually there?" "Yes... It is"
"Ok, so I climb the pillar, up to around 10 feet and then let go."
(Already had the d6s ready) "roll for damage" "ok, 6, that kills the rat, right? So I ain't polymorphed anymore?" "Yes..."
That’s really freaking smart actually. Escape bodily imprisonment through best form suicide. Love it.
What was your character?
@@joshuadixon8510 homebrew psionics class I made playing with an Illithid homebrew race I made too
Smart. That made me think of the time when our druid was knocked down to 1 hit point after he was forced out of his wildshape. The party was the druid, a bard, a paladin, an NPC rogue and me, a sorcerer. So our druid, as a giant constrictor snake, took 51 damage which forced him out of his wildshape and his character took 26 damage leaving him with 1 hit point. The paladin was out of spell slots and lay on hands. None of the rest of us had healing spells; the bard was an offense melee, and as a sorcerer and a rogue neither me or the NPC could even get healing spells (due to the world it's set in everyone is a human so no racial abilities either). It was then the bard's turn and she casted Polymorph on the druid.
She turned him into a young green dragon.
He went from being a giant snake to a nearly dead human to a being a goddamn *dragon*.
Other things the bard has polymorphed us into when we were at low health and too far away from the druid or paladin (or they were out of healing) include: a green dragon wyrmling, a chimera, an earth elemental, a nothic, a fire giant, and a hydra.
We have since begun to refer to it as "Kuri's Alternative Healing"
Yep. Also if you don't need verbal, somatic or materials components you could cast spells as rat (unless something says otherwise as long as you retain your mental stats you can cast spells).
Polymorph normally makes you have rat intelligence though, but props for the DM and players for rolling with it because it's cool.
IT IS THE RETURN OF ABSERD
The ultimate multi-class, with the power of a player PACKET
He said he was not gone and it is abserd who didn't do the leaving and abserd has returned!
The party fighter opens a door in the dungeon and happens to see it is a room filled with orcs. Realizing that there were too many orcs to fight, he slowly closes the door and walks away. As he walks away the door starts to open. The player asks, "How is the door opening? They're orcs?" My response, "How do you think they got into the room in the first place?"
I guess that clumsy Paladin fit what seemed to be his own theme song; he needed a hero. XD
Okay I've got one.
I once gave a bomb to a goddess and was gifted a magic item in return.
So for context, this is in a homebrew game. I'm playing an artificer, but my wonderful DM has allowed me to change-up the playstyle. I got a custom set of traits called Idiot-Savant and Anarchist cook, which basically make me really stupid and childish, but I can build bombs between battles to use. It's a really neat trait with some fun stuff (For example, a bomb made with fishhooks that pulls 3 enemies towards the center of it).
Now as for the full story, we were just transported to the edge of the Feywilds. Mostly this was because of us another a different goddess, but that's a story for another time. So we end up going into the Feywilds to get some bones of a dead god we're working with (Again, another story). Our cleric gets separated from us, so it's just me and the party warlock, who's patron is actually a Fae (And her husband).
So after a bit we get to chatting with the Fae-Mother. Thinking for a moment, I decided to give myself a self-imposed will check. My character, Ashe, is really dumb. Being born and raised as a fire genasi in the Elemental Plane of Fire, he thinks that giving bombs is an amazing gift, so he's constantly wanting to give bombs to people. So I have him roll to resist the urge to give a bomb to the Fae Mother.
I got a 2.
So immediately my character whips out the biggest bomb he had on him, which casts fireball when lit. He then holds it up to the Fae Mother and goes "Oh you seem nice! Here, have a bomb!" So I'm sitting there waiting for my boy to be annihilated, when suddenly the DM tells me that she smiles and takes the bomb. Not only that, but she gave me Boots of the Fae in return as a gift, which let me cast Misty Step once a day.
Now I'm a teleporting child-like anarchist bomb-maker. I love D&D.
Nope. It was an actual thing. DM might've recorded the session too, but I don't remember.
A party with two orcs, a satyr, and a kitsune in a coastal city full of proper people is absurd enough. XD
If anyone here says "first", I've got a blue shell with their name on it!
First
First. Where's the shell?
@@LinkJTO RIP you brave, foolish soul
SMASH THAT FIRST CART!!
FiRsT
My GM once used Abserd as the BBEG... I wanted to kill my character right then and there
that must of been an abserd adventure
@@3verlong *nose inhale nose exhale*
@@3verlong mmhmm yes, there will be great danger!
What happened
Oh hey guys it’s me! The one who will be saving the magical world needing to be saved by Abserd!
First time I played Aberrant, I made a bored, overconfident genius with mostly psychic- and engineering-focused powers. Due to having an eidetic memory perk, ESP, Holo (a power that allows projecting illusionary images, as well as sounds with the right bonus), and a DM-granted power to summon popcorn boxes at will, I had essentially gained the ability to record an event mentally and become a movie theater, even without actually being there.
This was used to its greatest effect when I watched an event where two PCs were trying out their newfound powers, and one proceeded to throw the other straight up in the air a few hundred meters (saved partially by an NPC that liked them, partially by classic anime pratfall-into-boobs). I watched this event via ESP and then projected it to watch with another PC and NPC who hadn't seen it, munching away at popcorn with a smug grin the whole time.
During a 5e Saltmarsh campaign (minor spoilers) the party’s Warlock went exploring the town during a few days downtime.
After rolling REEALY high for multiple exploration rolls, she accidentally found the abandoned building that Xolec the Vampire is trapped in.
She goes in the basement and comes face to face with him. Amazingly, she passes the save VS his charm. Impressed, Xolec talks to Warlock and asks her to bring him someone “pure of spirit”
2 in-game days later, she lured a child to the basement, cast sleep, then lowered him down via a rope.
Flabbergasted, the DM changed her alignment from CN to CE.
Long story short, where now fighting off a swarm of children who have been turned into Vampire Thralls, led by a very familiar Vampire Spawn.
The thumbnail alone got me to click.
Ooh! This reminds me of something that happened in the last session I DMed. It was my first campaign and third session as a DM ever.
The players were all idiots and land pirates, no not bandits, land pirates. They wanted to put wheels on a boat and essentially be pirates that sailed the lands.
So the party was around lvl 3 and as the geniuses they were, they decided to attack a noble's carriage. In this world, there was no max lvl (homebrew in beyond) instead, once you reached lvl 20 you could reroll a stat and stack stats and skills.
I didn't want to TPW so I halved the lvl 7 guards hp and reduced their AC a bit, locked abilities, and reduced the number to 4 with one always protecting the noble. The party killed the first two just fine and the last two were at a combined hp of 50, so I thought I'd unlock their multiattack ability allowing them to attack 3 times saying something along the lines of "in their desperation, they unlocked grater potential". Anyway, long story short, they let the noble start running and it was 4v1 against the last guard who at this point had 1 hp.
His AC was 16, so he wasn't that hard to hit, but this guy didn't go down without a fight. The players' turn came and they all took turns attacking him bot not a single one of the 4 hits. Now it was the guard's turn, so I had him attack the tank who was a cleric who thought he was a paladin. Attacks n1, nat 20. Attack n2, nat 20. Attack n3, 19+5 so it also hit. The only healer who had the most HP and highest AC (20) got 1 shotted thanks to some good damage rolls. Now it's the players turn, and of course, they all rolled below 10 giving the guard another turn. The guard hit one of the rouges and killed him as well. Finally, they get that 1 hp of damage done to the guard and he falls over dead. Rouge gets revived with some random shroom from the forest but the "paladin" rolls nat 1 on a death save and just dies.
Rip "paladin".
In the forgotten realms, I was DMing for a high-level party, and entered the desert (the big one that had that ancient civilization in it? That one.) and I had ruled the place is entirely covered by an anti-magic field, as extra punishment by Mystra.
One of the things they tried was to find the very center of the desert, and casted anti-magic field.
I said if they rolled a nat 20, it will work.
They rolled a twenty.
I ruled that the desert is now an empowered magic zone. Spells cast there can be up to 12th level, because Mystra loves her creative problem solving.
Was playing a homebrew campaign in a world called the glistening sea. We were sailing on a boat on a journey halfway around the world and had been through some crazy encounters already. So our ship could use some R&R. We rolled for a midday encounter and our DM looked at his random encounters list. Suddenly he grinned wildly and said “hmmm okay. Yeah.” Then he began narrating. Out in the distance a gargantuan figure walked on the waves toward our ship. It was a storm giant who with a crazy smile identified himself as Neptineas the son of the Goddess of the sea. He wanted to help us somehow. But we had to say that we accepted his help. After much concerned debating and with much trepidation we decided to accept. He proceeded to pick up our ship and straight up yeet it through the sky, where we finally landed, skipping on the water, ship BARELY in one piece and roughly two days closer to our destination. Thanks a lot Neptineas.
How many days would it have taken if you hadn't accepted?
Man, the wizard who impaled himself to death had me belly laughing. That was hilarious.
Not a super long story, but a moment we'll probably never let the player forget.
A while before the incident, the players went into a puzzle dungeon, and one of them came out with a magical parasol, allowing for a single person wielding it to have an infinite feather fall so long as it's open and unbroken.
Fast forward, and everyone's at a mountaintop city, burnt to cinders by a blood cult. Sorcerer, tank fighter, and archer fighter are there, combating blood elementals. Tank is taking heavy hits, and archer decides to close the distance to take some of the heat off of him. He's on a raised section, and could get there in one turn, but would need to jump a decent gap to make it.
He fails his acrobatics check, and falls, only able to survive by slowly drifting down to earth from the top of a mountain on a frilly parasol, while his tank is rolling death saves from having his blood siphoned out of him by the elementals.
Fortunately everyone survives, but it's was a tough fight to begin with, and they were down one dps from pretty early on.
Nice Puffin Forest Joke
@@ArtifexAnimations you do a grand job. Cant wait to see more of the thumbnails when i watch these videos
I would love to hear more about that Kitsune homebrew race, did you know Kitsune is the Japanese word for fox and the name of a magical creature?
Perfect Freaking Timing, my dude. Thank you!
DM ed a short campaign , had a set of 4 “ Monks “ roll up in a Black wagon with a Red stripe . 1 had a lvl of Bard proficiency Acting 1 had a lvl of Rouge with stupid high charisma. 1. Had high Intelligence low wisdom meaning he was smart but didn’t act wisely. 1 had a huge Strength modifier and was a Dwarf with a dark complexion. Basically I sent in the ATeam as NPCs or rather there less impressive DND counter parts the C team.
I loooove this.
Tldr. My PC accidentaly drugged himselve, started to see things and convinced EVERYBODDY to flee as friends.
i shouldn't be disappointed, but when i saw absurd i was excited to see another abserd episode
Useing aberd as your cover should be illegal. Of course i'm going click on the damn video.
@@ArtifexAnimations nah it looks great. And you make great thumbnails by the way.
Me: *sees thumbnail*
Also me: *Hmmm*
I run a hunger games campaign and one of the trainers gave a player some really bad advice (we goof off a lot) and they followed it to a tee. The play an Aaracrokra. This was for the tribute interviews, they moon walked across the stage “smiling” (they are a bird so it looked like a scream) when asked if they would team with their cousin in the games they said “probably not I have no friends” yelled Pachycephalosaurus three times and when alpacas were brought up (this person makes some weird backstorys) they did a cartwheel off the stare and ran. This character does the funniest things.
3:02 "Good job 47, now head to the exit and we discuss your next assigment.*
“That’s how he decided to go out… with a bang.”
Damn. Double entendre
Are an Anti-Paladin and a Blackguard the same thing?
4:48 I could swear I've heard this one before.
5:43 Seriously? What the heck?
8:47 ...Well, at least he went out with a bang.
9:12 Full Monty Python right there.
11:30 LOLing against my will.
I derailed a modern campaign in the first session. The plot was supposed to be like that Revolution tv show. (Everyone loses power, stuff like that.) I was an investigative reporter. Since we started in the city, I wanted to raid the stores for supplies. We could make up any store we wanted, within reason. I ended up leading the party to Bloodbath and Beyond. Later, we all bought pets, named them, and decided to deck out the van with cherry blossom decals along with armor. We spent the rest of the session naming everyone's pets.
I'm currently a player in a game, where I pay as a Satyr Bard - she's extremely naive and generally just shouldn't be out on her own. Another player, who's playing a very manipulative wizard, very early on starts being somewhat (ready VERY) innaproproate with with Satyr. However, she doesn't really understand what he's doing is wrong. Later he gets very protective of her and they have a very very strange parent/child relationship almost. He's started to warn her from always being so nice and that some people will take advantage of her - somehow, in her little messed up head, this have translated into him always having had her best interest at heart and even when they barely knew each other, he was trying to teach/procect her from bad men XD
Dam you got me with the puffin forest pic
I finally played my first session of D&D last night with some friends. Obviously there was some home brewing and I’m pretty sure it was a home brew world as well, but I definitely had fun. Only 20 I got all night was to stick my warforged hand in a fire to heat the metal hand to cauterize the gnomes wounds.
Getting your junk obliterated by a cannon is not one of the ways I would've thought of to kill off a PC.🤣
I was the DM in a home-brewed 5e campaign set in the Forgotten Realms. The party was in Mirabar, the home-town of Cankles, the loose, axe-swinging dwarf fighter of the group, and the evil queen Dagrila had a price on Cankles’ head. The queen had been torturing family members and friends in order to hunt her down, and the feud had gotten personal. To tell this story, I’ll also have to introduce you to another PC - Ace Gilles des Raise, a gnomish divination wizard who always spoke with a thick French accent.
One day during a session, the Gnome Wizard announces: “DM! Dan (the dwarf) and I would like to try something.”
“Sure, go ahead,” I say.
The gnome wizard proceeds to cast sending to the Queen, and informs her (in his thickest French accent) that he has captured the criminal Cankles, and wants to bring her in and collect the award. I dutifully RP the Queen responding in delight and inviting the Gnome to the palace, cackling in anticipation of being able to finally torture and kill the hapless dwarf!
Another important note: Earlier in the campaign Cankles had picked up a necklace of fireballs with three beads on it, and it had always been hanging around her neck.
My friend Dan (Cankles) describes how he takes off all his armor and weapons, and sets most of his gear aside. The Gnome puts a set of manacles they had on him, and off they march to the palace as the rest of the players sit and watched in amusement, wondering where this would go.
They RP their way through the guards at the palace doors, get shown through grand hallways, before finally being admitted to the crowded central throne room.
Rubbing her hands in fiendish glee, I RP-ed the queen descending from her throne to gloat over her prisoner, while the gnome loudly demands his money. The Queen says: “yes yes, you will be paid at once!” - and goes back to gloating.
It is at this point that the gnome speaks up and says” “Ok! Well, it seems as if you have everything in order, I also want my manacles back ok,” and he reaches up and unlocks them from the dwarf’s wrists.
All eyes are on the pair with the queen in front of them as Dan (the dwarf) describes how he quickly reaches up and pulls the Necklace of Fire balls from under his shirt and tosses it straight up in the air.
The air seems to go out of the room as everyone watches the necklace arc upwards, hit apogee, and turn to descend back where it came.
“I grab Cankles and cast Dimension Door!” says the Gnome with triumph in his voice, “and teleport us out into the entry hall of the Palace!”
The table erupted in laughter and glee. There was applause.
I glanced down at my notes, then asked: “What SIZE is your gnome character Wade?”
There was some shuffling of papers, then he awkwardly replied “Small”.
“Well,” I said, “Dwarves are medium, and you can only take a creature with you that is the same size as you or smaller, so you grab at Cankles as you cast the spell, and find yourself suddenly in the entry hall, empty handed. Cankles, back in the throne room YOU watch as Ace suddenly vanishes a heartbeat before the Necklace hits the ground. Please roll for damage.”
I have to say, we played this campaign for an entire year, and this was my favorite moment. The Dwarf and the Gnome DID make it out alive after the Gnome blew through half of his deck of illusions.
The ‘Beholder’ that he apparated in the atrium made quite the impression, and the severely burned dwarf rolled really well on strength and dexterity checks as she barreled out of there, grabbing the wizard on the way.
We all agreed it was an awesome escapade and everyone learned to read your spells really carefully.
We were playing a game set in Asteroth (warcraft). My character was a 10 ft tall troll barbarian named Trungan. I had a raptor mount that I brought into battle. An accidental mount smack later, I tried to throw the raptor at my enemy with my crazy athletics but failed that too and the raptor ran away. With a few crazy rolls I found a wild raptor and tamed it. We ended up doing through a portal and I missed a few sessions. When I come back the raptor is still tied up in the stables very hungry and angry. I killed the table hand and tried to feed it to him. People noticed, I went to jail, and lost all my money to my party mate who was a goblin lawyer. A few sessions later I removed a pirate captain's head and spine after tackling him through a second story wall.
Two orcs a Satyr and a Kitsune.
That sounds like the set up for a joke
I have two stories that involve the same thing as the DM; first one is that my players were fighting a very powerful being I made in a home brew campaign, the first player decided it was a good idea to throw the other player as a weapon (second was still alive), then on his next turn decide to floss, he rolled a 10, so I described the situation as that he floss so bad, the gods decided to punish him by damaging him; the second story is that my players (first is still the same player, second this time is a different person) were about to fight a vampire, so before entering the room, the second decided to make a grand entrance, I thought he was going to be intimidating, but no he wanted to be very flamboyant, he rolled extremely well (forgot the actual roll) so I described it as that he kick down the door, then entered so flamboyant like a model as if the universe wanted this moment to happen.
So I have a character who I originally just called "Spear Guy," (I'm terrible at coming up with names) as I use polearms. Funnily enough one of the other players gave me the name Lance to fit the theme, and I declared that my name is Lance Guy. Most of us got a good laugh out of that one.
So the story. We had dropped down a hole onto a circular platform that had a seemingly endless pit all around and five pedestals about five feet from the platform (well specifically we landed on the pedestals). This was a boss fight, and definitely one that, if the dm had rolled better (he needs to sub), could have resulted in a TPK. Well, the dice were on the players' side, and I got enlarged after making it to the platform. I grabbed the boss and tossed him to the abyss. The dm had prepared for this (and if we fell off) by making it a loop that would safely drop anything that fell back up to one of the pedestals (like featherfall), but it wouldn't happen until the falling thing's turn.
So dropping the boss only resulted in wasting his turn. It was pretty good seeing as what he was going to do got delayed long enough for us to get him and his lackey low hp. My next turn after he landed, I chucked a javelin at him, partially as a test. It landed on one of the other stages at the beginning of my next turn.
We finally have them both pretty low when he finally gets to do his thing. He was casting Fear affecting the whole party. We all had to immediately run as far from him as we could... So I said, "ok, I jump." I already know that I'll just land back up top, and I have to get as far as I can safely get from what I'm afraid of. In character I'm thinking I might end up even further away from him depending on where I land.
My next turn comes, and I land on the closest one to him. Still afraid I throw, and miss, another javelin at him and just flip him the double bird as I jump backwards off the platform once again so I could make a saving throw against the fear. I passed.
Best part is I got the rogue to jump that turn too. Then the barbarian goes and finishes the boss making the 'featherfall' effect end, and we both just hit the ground on our turns moderately close to ko'ing one of us. Lucky thing though, I landed with my first javelin so I was able to easily retrieve it.
*whispering to rip-daddy* I can't come up with a clever TL:DR, so if this gets narrated, just put something in there and pretend it's from me, thanks.
One of our favorite moments in the first session of a campaign
dm: the dragon breathes fire and burns the grass around you to flex superiority and begins to fly away
Druid: I call him an asshole and throw a rock
(Nat1)
Dm: you miss terribly however the dragon heard you and shouts “what you say you little bitch!?!?!?” Aaaaaand roll initiative
I've got one. I was playing as a kobold rogue, and I was ransacking a general store for shinies when the guard arrived. I asked the DM if I had time to throw together a disguise and still jump out the window to escape. He said yes. I rolled, aaaaaand, well, it wasn't a nat 1, but it was a 4, so it was pretty clear I was going to be recognized. I decided, heck, if I took the time to make a disguise anyway, I might as well have some fun with it. I asked my DM if I could do something ridiculous with the disguise, and he agreed, so there I was, a kobold with a mask and cape that made me look exactly like, wait for it, A KOBOLD! Yep. I was a kobold, in a kobold costume. I jumped out the window, and was spotted by the guard, who said, "Look, there's the thief! It's a kobold! Wait, no, yeah, it's still a kobold. What the heck?" I managed to escape the city with a few lucky rolls, making the whole disguise incident pointless, but it was still my favorite moment from that entire session. XD
So this is from my current campaign of Curse of Strahd, of which i am the Dm.
The party was about to enter the village of Vahlaki, whereupon a new player came into the game. For flair, he appeared in a summoning circle in the sky. As the party looked up they saw a 3ft tall, cross-eyed goblin fell on top of the wizard. The Goblin, named Sydwinder, had a permanent -2 to perception (player wanted this added for Role play). After that introduction they made it to the city and Sydwinder went to find a blacksmith, had him roll for perception, he rolled a nat 1, which was a -1 with his modifier.
So, instead of finding the blacksmith he finds a chicken. He then rolls an intelligence check (he asked to do this) and got another nat 1. Sydwinder now was convinced that this chicken was a god in disguise. The player then asks to class into paladin, I okay it, and now we have a goblin fighter with paladin who worships a chicken...funny thing is that it worked and now Clucky the chicken god of vengence is now empowering the cross-eyed goblin Sydwinder....I love DnD.
I can just see magical anti gravity orb dude... "my time is NOW!"
I got a fun story to share but it's a bit long.
So this particular story happened when we just got back from our latest adventure in Saltmarsh. Unfortunately, half our group couldn't make it to the session so there was only my Aquatic Half-Elf Bard/Sorcerer - Ellamir and my friend's Human Rogue - Marius Bond. My dm didn't want to continue the story without the rest of the group so we decided to learn how to sail so we can hunt for pirates. Only problem was we need 15 weeks to have proficiency in sailing. That's fine, what's the worst that can happen?
The first few weeks went off without a hitch. In the 4th week however, we received a letter that demands us 400 gp of fish and to meet us in a specific location for the transfer. We didn't want buy that of course so we decided a better idea, we teach them how to fish. So we sent a letter back along with a high persuasion roll to convince them for lessons. As it turns out, the one that sent the letter was actually a group of skeletons. So Ellamir and Marius spent a night teaching skeletons how to fish. We also got a Belt of Dwarvenkind out of it.
A couple of weeks passed and we received another letter that demand 40gp or else they destroy the town. Some investigation rolls revealed that this letter was not written with human hands. After some discussion, Ellamir and Marius decided to go to the listed meeting spot, and with my Helm of Telepathy, cast detect thoughts. As it turns out, it was a bunch of crabs demanding money. These are not special or giant crabs, just normal crabs. We also somehow convinced them to be adventurers. We bought them crabsized gear and everything. One even has a little shield. They called themselves The Crabsaders.
After another week, my in-game father decided to join an evil dark cult for some reason. Luckily, I rolled high on my persuasion and I managed to convince him that being in a cult is a bad idea and he should be ashamed of himself. And then on week 11, he joined another cult, AGAIN! IN THE SAME MONTH! Not taking any chances, I dragged my in-game mom with me so I could have advantage on my persuasion roll.
Finally, after all of that nonsense, we finally completed our 15 weeks of learning how to sail. To celebrate, we bought a keel and took the Crabsaders on their first adventure, which is hunting for pirates. We even brought the skeleton fishermen along with us too. It was a glorious and fun time.
I’ve got an absurd story I put on a video comments while ago. My party was hunting a bunch of demons after we accidentally screwed up saving a kids dad from being kidnapped by cultists. While we were doing alright in terms of killing them quickly, we were getting pretty aggravated at how much silver it would cost to make holy water ( we begged the the paladin to get a skill to make holy water.) After ‘acquiring’ multiple alchemy jugs, we learned we can make mayo in them (our players have had a long standing with mayo and large black boulders for a few games now and was totally my fault.) One of us wondered how much water was in mayo after we decided to make another batch of holy water to put on our weapons. We found out that to make 16 ounces of holy water, we could make about 2 gallons of holy mayo instead. The next demon we faced DEFINITELY did not think that anyone would attack it with swords, whips, shields, crossbows and bolts covered in mayo.
Ah yes. I was playing waterdeep: Dragon Hiest, and was playing an assassin dwarf with the typical honor and respect thing that dwarves hold important, and (minor spoilers beyond this point), when we got the deed to Trollskull Manor, I slapped Volo, because he didn't keep his word. The entirety of the party, except my dad, basically went "DUDE WHAT THE HELL!! TROLLSKULL MANOR WILL GIVE US *WAY* MORE MONEY!!" Both in character and out.
6:39 Their solution wasn't any worse than the DM's plan. DM wanted them to fight a child!
The panda story immediately reminded me of the nutty professor movie starring Eddie Murphy when a hamster grows gigantic and shoots his "pellets" at cops
Don't have a Reddit account so I'm putting my suggestion here. Maybe you could post it?
"What were the best ways you introduced a new pc after your other character died?"
Floating disc can’t hold that much weight, still a really creative solution though.
Trinston was here .
I kinda wish I knew how to play D&D.
It sounds fun.
If I got to choose my character I would choose something like Raza ( from bleach ) a flower that took over who ever it flew into. Small hard to see and hit. It might be classed as some kind of fairy if I had to guess.
... UA-cam's way of guessing what ads make sense is typically completely stupid, but I just had one that was half stupid, half understandable. A Tampax commercial featuring gaming streamers.
My player made a deal with a malevolent entity that killed two of his friends just because one of said friends was particularly rude to it and also tried to kill it
He did it for marshmallows
In return it will ask for a favour ( he will cause suffering to people)
Lucky his character likes that
I’m making a character and his backstory is that he got kicked out of his parents house for being accused of, burning down their very, VERY magic mushrooms
We were fighting a giant gargoyle, IN THE FIRST SESSION,got a oportunity attack, crit, slice his throat, he survived, WITH MORE THAN HALF OF HIS HEALTH, attacked back, hit, i die instantly
As someone with a myconid familiar , I love toad .
We beat a giant squid (who we had fought once before) by polymorphing it into a seagull. He stuck around with us until we had to leave him behind.
That invisible bugbear one makes no sense. If I hear an actual physical voice whispering in my ear, I don't assume it's my concience, I assume it's _a dude whispering in my ear_
10:10 New word of the day: "Jankily".
4:12 "My players stole a key to a villa in the richest neighborhood and killed the owners, now it's theirs".
Yeah uhh no. Go find an uninhabited mansion in Beverly Hills and pretend you own it.
See how long until the cops take you to jail.
Imagine taking a dump next to a king *and then get treated like a god*
this video is really..........
abserd
Goes into a town to retrieve a magical cauldron. Druid (me) is told to cause a distraction. I wild shaped into a donkey and had someone cast spider climb on me. A distraction was made. Tales were told of the unstoppable donkey that ended up stealing a magic cauldron before running straight over the town walls and into the horizon.
Same campaign, the party bought a donkey to pull our cart. I used speak with animals to talk to it. It said “are you going to free me from these stupid stables?” My response: “freedom is… relative.”
Two of my dnd group decided to take a giant out on a date, neither knew how to speak its language, and one of them was a 3 foot tall muse with an antimatter rifle on his back, the rest of them were captured and thrown in a cell, the one I was killed in a few games ago when I was kidnapped by hags in the ethereal plane, we manage to break out and somehow defeat 1 hag, the other got away, a spiritual blademaster, and the giant, all wothout weapons, my character went down 5 or 6 times, the last time he was unconscious, a cleric healed us all and was shot In the back, I, with 14 health, decide to return the favor and heal her, i forgot to take the arrow out of her back and she nearly passed out again
two part members tried to get across a lake that we were not supposed to go across yet. they tried for half an hour with an axe that had wayy to much knockback and a rope hitting one person who then pulls the rope back to get wacked with. we all got sick of it and the only reason they did not die is because the DM let me have a flying demon cheetah.
It is great thumbnail it is in helping me click on video. :D
Drinking the BBEG. Enough said.
Regarding the panda poop.
That is both disgusting and awesome.
For me it would be when i made for the level 6 party an enemy with 1200 hit points made of tangible shadows, immune to not magic attacks, with advantage on shadows, weakness to radiance (for me it also means that the sun light and the heals can deal damage to him), that couldn't fly but couldn't receive fall damage because it had no weight. Then what happened? At first i thought i was too hard because 4 of them almost died on the first turn and i was ready to tell them that his power was temporary and they only to survive for a bit, etc...... but then the mage and the cleric did the unthinkable, one grabbed him with mage hand because he had no weight and i failed his save on strenght with a 1 and he had -1 in strenght because was a only a powerful warlock, so the mage dragged him around without a problem and the cleirc used his holy water to make one of the nearby bathouses as a prefect and relaxing place to swim...or drown a boss....yes what followed was basically 2 hours of drowning the boss and if he succeded in removing the mage hand another spellcaster used it or the cleric had a magic weapon in the form of a shield ready to push him in (the party was cleric, warlock, sorcerer, mage, ranger), in the worst case they were even ready to freeze the water surface to block him (and they actually did it) but is this the story? Not yet, there is one thing that happened that made it memorable! The beastmaster ranger (that was basically useless in all of this except for the fact that it took in the face one of the few spells the boss could unleash in one of his little times of freedom) that was at 1HP decided that he wanted to be the protagonist of the action so he tried to do an epic action when the boss was reduced at 6HP, he rolled acrobatic to run and then launch himself like a rocket to decapitate in samurai fashion the boss, and he did a Nat1, so i describe how he was naruto running at full speed but before he could jump he remembered that he was running on ice so without any means to stop the momentum he hit the wall, destroying it and leaving like in Tom and Jerry the figure of himself jumping and reducing his HP to 0.....we all almost died of laughter, the party killed the boss and saved the ranger that was almost dead with already two failed saving throws (his first saving throw was 1 again).
I guess those Elves were right about those Orcs.
Fan of Puffinforest, are we?!
Abserd is very famous that way you know
a skeleton who could only say I'm a cleric in common
I am 100% sure that I already heard story number 3, paladin wants to make great entrance and kills himself because he keeps rolling critical fails, in one of your recent videos.
Or did I just imagine that one?
I'm 99% sure its not a repeat, only happened twice before.
Myconid? CHROMAGIL!!!!
Just keeping a timestamp for myself
7:22
Just wanted to share something that happened on my first ever campaign as a player.........we were a party of 4 and my friend was DMing and we had a lot of funny stuff happen a long the way such as when me ( a high elf wizard ) and our Barbarian tank ( which was a big black character as he wanted 2 be himself in the campaign ) had a fight because he wanted 2 steal some of my robe and he retaliated and nearly killed me with his ax after I hit him with a stick.......but thats not the funniest thing...... the barbarians name was Deldric which later became dildo thanks to this...... as we were walking along a trail we came across a trap which our barbarian got trapped in leaving him hanging by the ankle.....out DM then said that as he went up the loin cloth he was wearing flipped upside down and it was all showing......I then made a joke about it hitting out halfling thief in the face and from that moment on he Became Dildo the barbarian with an 11 foot dick which he used 2 pole vault over the trap
Mikea my first dm and so far only had tall mart small mart black mart and fall mart
Ya'll covered the same story twice? the one with the paladin impaleing themselves.
One of my first time playing D&D me and my friends were going through a dungeon that bottle necked to a small hallway when we were ambushed by cobalts as they came down the tunnel I decided to "ATTEMPT" to kick one of the two lava filled cauldrons over to burn them alive. DM says "roll a strength check" Nat 1 stubbed my pinky toe. Next turn the cobalt are closer this time i try to push it Nat 1 in my haste I break my finger I try again surely I cant be this unlucky Nat 1 my hand goes in the lava at this point I give up with the pot and fought normally later one of my friends managed to steal a warhorse from an enemy during our next encounter and decided to have me ride it for an advantage...big mistake I walked 30ft and manage to step on a trapdoor falling 30 feet down on spikes killing the horse and almost killing me. One fight later I managed to survive with 1 HP and were going to camp in the room with one door leading farther into the dungeon well I wanted to see what was on the other side of the door DM said "ok roll for perception." nat 1... "you try to put your ear on the door but in your weary state trip and slam your head against the door you take 1 damage and are now knocked out"
I have discovered the untold fourth stooge.
The party was playing a mystery and had found the bad guy. Since he was seen by the town as an important and respected man, they had gotten him out of town to question him about his accomplish. However, the party could not get him to tell who his accomplish was. They decided to go back to town to find more evidence and the other accomplish, they did not have any rope (used it earlier to get some other information) and decided to use mold earth to bury him up to the neck and leave the rouge as a lookout, the player had to make a cigarette run. When they returned to the rouge who btw is a NE female feral Tiefling with a snake like tongue and demon wings who is super sexy according to the female player who likes bdsm, she described, in too much detail as she had the whole trip to think about it, how her character had been liking his eye with her tongue and other sadistic tortures things the character had done to the poor guy in the ground. They still didn’t get the information as the guy was to traumatize to say a word ever again, and her character didn’t want to try getting the information.
Oh and we made a rule in our friend group that no one were to be left alone at the beach with that player.
In the last session we played in a campaign I'm in, our monk jumped in an Orb of Annihilation, AFTER he had already lost his hand to it. This players os the definition of problem player, he creates stupid characters with bad personalities(his druid was a pothead and his monk was an alcoholic), who are way too high level for what they actually were(we are currently lvl8) never takes the game seriously, only makes jokes and jumped in the Orb only because that would be a stupid death and he wanted to be know for those kind of things, sacrificing a character he apparently liked and actually had some lore this time just for a stupid joke.
The title gave me puffin forest vibes
Because it has absurd on it a puffin forest character
While in Wyllowwood in the Dungeon of the Mad Mage, our druid tried and spectacularly failed twice to seduce Wyllow. I, the dashing rogue step up, crit on sweet talking her and proceed spend the night in her bed chambers, if you catch my drift.
I rejoined the party the next morning with one level of exhaustion and proceed to brag to our salty druid.
The meal of infinity basicly everything is a shredded cheddar cheese and parmesan cheese ketchup and Mayo burrito. Trees? Ketchup bottles homes? Nah burrito hut. Castle? Hahaha burrito walls ketchup pillars. The king? Pile of shredded cheese the NPCs ha nope mayo bottle people. Our wizard is a burrito caster he made the f*ng map
reminds me of an old Beetle Bailey comic:
"A company will reconnoiter the area covered by the banana blob, then move along the jelly smear and attack the coffee ring..."
I was playing a game which had jojo stands (we’re still doing it, we just don’t have a lot of time) and in the most recent one, they made me drink some water in the desert, and I fucking threw a lizard at where the enemy is.
okay so the first one... SCP_3008
You had too put puffins character
man I hate getting clickbaited.....
Idk if it's okay to use Abserd as the cover,, especially without credit... I thought it was a new Puffin video and I got excited but this is definitely not Puffin
Oh hay it’s a pf thumb nail
666 likes lets goooooooooo
Where is your mention of Puffin in your description?
Don't be grimey now. You know where it came from and you made the thumbnail.
@@ArtifexAnimations I meant to be more cheeky than harsh but it didn't read that way. I often get the feeling that most D&D UA-camrs are pretty chill about most things. I guess I was expecting more Abserd, and was a little head faked.
early pog
First
I have nothing better to do
yup, you are first
he’s actually the first wow
the chosen one, the first person that is actually first
Memes 4 Life has a blue shell for you
Wow, this channel has stooped to an all new low. You guys didn’t even credit #PuffinForest?!