Reading the title,maybe OP's ex family realize that their daughter is the problem and then they harassing OP because they didn't want to deal with her crap anymore. Is that it?
Biggest red flag is a grown woman being jealous of a thirteen-year-old. I would be brutally honest with Linda and tell her that she brings nothing but drama to the table and I don't like her, let alone love her.
Excuse my west, but it is so screwed up for your whole family to come after you for a relationship you don't want. Wanting to see your kids happy and married is one thing, but OP made it clear he wouldn't be happy with her. All this during his final exam week?! I'd be crushed too.
This doesn't sound like an arranged marriage. The process, the names, the phrases all make it sound like one of those Jehovas witnesses, Christian Scientists, LDS and so many other who also refer to the rest of us as the "west" . We have them here in Chile and Argentina too.
I understand OP not wanting to have his family influence his opinion but he already knew he wanted to break things off. I'm glad OP shared the whole situation with his family, and they were supportive!
I kind of think OP caused most of his headache by not telling anyone in his family the reason. He even admits that on the outside it was a perfect relationship. The family is worried he's making a mistake or may have cold feet or something else. Cant really be mad at your loved ones trying to keep you from making a mistake.
Yeah that's one of the things about the story that gets me. If your family is talking to you about it, seems rather weird not to just say why you don't want to be engaged anymore. I get not feeling the need to justify yourself to the ex's family, but if I broke up with someone I wouldn't hesitate to tell people still in my life why. Unless there's some underlying issue between the original poster and their family we don't have context for that would lead to him not wanting to be honest. From the outside I can't blame them for thinking that he's making a mistake.
I disagree. I guarantee the parents wouldn't have believed OP, accused him of overreacting, minimized him with platitudes like "no one's perfect" etc. Nothing short of a full meltdown would have snapped them out of it.
This. He kept on emphasizing how he was trying to take the high road by keeping quiet about his fiance's behavior but all he was doing was shooting himself in the foot to keep the peace. This guy needs to learn how to communicate better so that others don't take advantage of the situation to force him into making decisions he doesn't want. Honestly, this wasn't a western perspective problem. He just thought he could have handled this fiance problem by himself and it eventually got so bad that it eventually blew up in his face. All the while he was putting on a show that the relationship was still going good while it most certainly wasn't. Just not smart. I'm just rolling my eyes at the part where he says he felt the sting of betrayal from his family but he's the one who put himself in that sort of situation where he isolated himself from them. They can't know what's going on if he never tells him anything. And he even admits that they would have pushed him to leave her if he told them the truth too.
Guess we know why her dad insisted on the archaic betrothal ceremony, he knows his daughter is hell on wheels & is determined to make it someone else's problem despite her parents being the reason she's like this in the first place.
Guess he figured he'd cover all his cultural and legal bases that way, in case some groom-to-be tries to wiggle out of the arrangement because some part of the ceremony wasn't followed to the letter later. Still didn't seem to matter, though (hee hee).
A good answer to the "you're not getting any younger" arguement is "Yeah, I thought about that and decided that even if they are the last person I ever date, I would prefer to remain alone." Thinking about it that way really puts the situation in perspective for some reason.
Yeah..."Fly 1000 miles and get engaged to someone you don't know." Now I know why her family wanted a groom that lives that far away - so he can take her back with him. 😂
Oh man, this made me think of one of my favorite lines from one of my fave short stories: "A Good Man is Hard To Find" from Flannery O'Connor. When the convict finally kills the loudmouthed old lady that kept making everything worse, he said, “She would've been a good woman... if it had been somebody there to shoot her every minute of her life.”
Idk how you even meet someone that lives that far away. Frankly, that would be an instant no for me to even date. It would be a logistical nightmare. Married life would consist of not being near at least one of the families and of course dating would be a headache.
“I’m not marrying her dad!” Exactly! … Unless … 🤔 (jk, lol.) I’m glad OP stuck to his guns and didn’t go through with the engagement. Can’t imagine spending the rest of my life with “crazy” … exactly why ex’s family was so damn eager to give her away! I hope there’s a way for OP to retake that final exam, because EVERYONE chipped in fricking that up.
Lol I only read the title and I’m laughing. I find it funny when people are so toxic their own family doesn’t want them back. Hope she sees the error of her ways and stops this lunacy before she nukes any future relationships.
Though with her age, that is very unlikely that she will change. I blame her parents, they created that monster and are probably doing nothing to change her and keep on enabling that type of behavior.
@@toportime Yep. They probably spoiled her rotten and now they're still not doing anything to correct her behavior. At this point, I don't know if therapy can help her because most people are usually developed by their thirties right?
The family of bridezilla are very desperate to force him to get back together with her just so they don’t they don’t have to deal with the whining, crying, bitching, and yelling from their very entitled and enabled child. I wonder if this toxic narcissist was only dating OP just so she can get him to propose and have her dream wedding where she is the center of attention like she wanted all along while OP suffers in the background.
Well, we can see that was dad’s agenda just by him pressing OP to be officially engaged to his brat of a daughter before he could even think about “dating” her. Dad knew what she was like and didn’t want any guy getting to “really” know her by dating her without a way to make him commit to a marriage! Disgusting of her family to try to trick a guy into a torturous marriage with a harpy 😡
OP would have saved himself a lot of heartache if he just told his parents the reasons why he was not marrying her in the first place. It may not be their place, but it doesn't matter since she will be a stranger to them, and their opinions and feelings will no longer matter.
The worst thing any parent can do is to force their children to be with or take back an ex that they don't want. My parents did that twice and ultimately it became a freaking nightmare and THEN they realized how stupid they were for not minding their business.
Everytime I hear stories like this I feel so grateful that while I love my parents and family their wants for my love life and really life in general mean absolutely nothing to me
I think in story 1 op dodged a bullet, however I wonder why he did not tell his parents about the reason of the break up from the beginning? is it that difficult to tell your own family you break the relationship bc of the reasons you are not guilty of? it is as if OP was feeling the worst person on the planet bc he stood up for himself. another thing - his parents . why the did not support their own child from the beginning? would they prefer seeing him in loveless marriage rather than happy single? they should have known to support their son when he opposed for the first time. Good for op to realize this was not it, and not to bend under the social pressure.
It wouldn't have made any difference if OP told his parents sooner. They wouldn't have taken him seriously, accused him of being childish and overreacting, given him platitudes like "no one's perfect" etc. Nothing short of a full meltdown would have gotten past their stubbornness.
@@DrownedInExile I think part of it was actually a social pressure. In the name of: " what people would think of us" many people were forced into arranged marriages just because sp called " honour of family" was more important than a living person. What hit me though is that a parent did not even try to defend the decision of his own child but turned against him instead.
What do you mean? When OP initially said he wanted to break up, his parents basically said, "About time." They changed their tune later after the fiance's family started harassing them. Folks will twist into all sorts of knots to stop harassment, especially when they don't have all the facts. They sided with him as soon as he explained how miserable he was.
Story 1 : The ex parents know that the chick is a complete stitch and they're trying to make op into a patsy aka " please take her off our hands we can't handle what a witch she is".. op DO NOT NOW OR EVER BACK DOWN UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES..
Huh!!!! Am I missing something??? Bridezilla? she’s not a bridezilla, there is no wedding planning 😮 she sounds more like Godzilla herself, and to get married for anything else but love is stupid. “WE want you to be happy, please marry a psychopath” blah
I feel like OP’s family were worried he got cold feet or had commitment issues or something… I mean, granted, your parents don’t need to be involved in your love life, but since his culture expects the parents to be involved from the beginning, he would probably have avoided a lot of heartache by letting them know early on. And thankfully they were fully supportive! And apologetic! Rare in these stories lmao
Story 1: Seriously wish I could slap OP. At least in the end, after breaking down and failing exam, he finally told the truth, what he should have done from the beginning.
Yes, he should tell everything in the beginning. However, his parents suck, they were bombarding him and demanding for him to take back his awful ex instead of asking for why he leaved her.
You really think that would have made a difference? I can all but guarantee the parents would have minimized his feelings, doubted him, hit him with platitudes like "no one's perfect", etc. Nothing short of a full on meltdown or strong action would have snapped them out of it.
@@DrownedInExile When he told the truth it sounds like his parents listened and changed opinion. Before that he made her look like a perfect and wonderful girlfriend because he lacked a spine to tell the truth.
“YOU’RE NOT MARRYING HER DAD” was also the first thing my brain was screaming the more LG read this story. 😂this whole “think of her dad/family/pet chihuahua” is defo an Asian thing (he’s probably somewhere from South Asia). He should have totally told his mom and dad the whole deal in the first place. The “keeping her honor” thing has limits. This being that limit.
Just when I'm listening to one of your videos while doing dailies in videogames, you drop another one! Thank you for quality content and greetings from Czech Republic!
If they want to get rid of her so badly, they could start by giving her the parenting she should've gotten years and make her get a job and her own place. It might be too late to change her behavior, but I don't think it's too late to start making her be an adult. And I'm sure that she won't find herself a husband with the spoiled bratty behavior she has.
The only family members' on OP's side was his siblings, they'd be the only one he should be comfortable talking with. The rest should reconsider their actions until OP is ready to talk to them. That being said, It honestly sucks he didn't want to tell him family anything, just to show he's an adult and can handle his own business, but the minute the Fiancé's parent got involved, OP should of told his parents. Hell I'd have told my parents prior if I knew someone was negative/bitter person, as I have no reason to belive they wouldn't spread lies about me. It sounds like she lied about the sister and wanted a second party so she could easily make up horrible stuff. Cheating, forceful 'passionately hugging', abuse, etc.
I think the best answer to anybody trying to force anyone into an arranged marriage is, "Where does it say that I've got to be unhappy for the rest of my life just to make YOU happy". If a marriage is arranged, it's doubly-important to make sure that all parties are happy as the repercussions of failure scatter in a much wider arc to hurt both families as well. Just one 'no' should always be enough.
Good on you for dropping a mean girl. We know why she has an ex boyfriend. Run!!!!! Spoiled, selfish people don’t make good spouses or parents.parents are sick of the monster they raised. They want someone to take her off their hands. Anyone would do. Tell your parents the truth
I find it hilarious that the woman drove 1,500 miles to save $2.50! Now, maybe she was visiting the other place and had just gotten back, but it still doesn't make much sense. Even if gas was only $2/gallon and her car got 30mpg, that's a total of 37.5 miles for the round trip. That means going more than 18.625 miles out of her way meant she'd end up losing money.
Poor OP, getting sucked into such a hellish experience for something that was entered into as an engagement "in name only". I hope that he's learned to find his spine earlier when things start going off the rails. And to not enter into that ceremony unless he really means it. He really should have told his parents what was going on earlier, especially when he had made the decision to end things. At that point, the deed was done, so there couldn't have been any influence after the fact.
Honestly sometimes some parents just forget while commenting on any relationship let alone their own child's is that- they don't know the other person as much as their child/the person who is arguing do. They cannot. So taking sides because someone else insists is horrible thing to do no matter how much it comes from the "right place".
The only thing OP crushed was her ego, and her family was so happy to pawn her off to someone and they're panicking that it might not happen. The sad part is they're partially responsible for her spoilt, selfish and entitled behavior. I hope OP ran and kept on running, and when he stops, he finds someone who is a better fit.
I kinda of get where OP was coming from because he wanted to be mature and try to handle everything on his own, to feel like he had his own identity. However OP has a strong family background so there is nothing wrong with telling the family some of the issues in the relationship because they were supportive about the break-up initially. If OP just explained it to his family like how he did to reddit half of this drama could have been avoided.
yeah... if getting a call from them is giving you the bad kind of anxiety during the courtship period, that's a pretty good indicator that it's not meant to be.
I wouldn’t talk to my entire family for a long time after this. J no ow granted Op should have explained the reason why he called it off because even though she didn’t do this, she could have made up accusations about why they called everything off. But back to the main point, I don’t care how worn down they were from his ex’s trash family, you don’t try to get anyone to marry someone who has been terrible to then just because you’re sick of their family.
OP is right to feel betrayed. Even if he had told his parents the truth - which he wasn't obligated to - they wouldn't have accepted it. They would have said he's overreacting, no one's perfect, etc. I hope he moves out.
@@DrownedInExileI keep on seeing you everywhere in the comments saying the same thing, but it's clear his family would've supported him if he told them the truth. You can't act like your relationship is perfect and then leave without explaining it to your family. He's at fault for how things ended up...
Her family is trying their best to get anyone to take her off their hands. They've already failed once to accomplish that. OP's father can always tell her father that OP never listens to him.that
OP should have told his parents the crap his ex did to him from the beginning so that they wouldn’t have put so much pressure on them, I’m giving them the benefit of the doubt that they wouldn’t have tried get their son back with the Bridezilla if they had known. His update definitely makes it sound like they would have had his back. I hope OP was able to make up for the bad exam.
Ask to sit down with the father and explain it to him. Don’t let him make excuses, just tell him this is not a negotiation, this is me being up front and allowing you to hear the issues that are going to come up with the next guy. That he might need to have a talk with her ex to see his side too. Then he can help address the issue with his daughter to help her in the future.
Family: "Please take her back". Translation: "Please take her off our hands!" OP: Cut them all out and go no contact and for a long holiday. Life's too short.
"Deciding whether you want to be in a relationship or not is one of the few times in life when you are allowed to think ONLY about what you want and no one else." This is wisdom for the ages.
I mean, yes and no. If you're married with kids and one moment you wake up and go "I am the only one who can decide if I want to be in a relationship!!" ... Maybe some councillor shipping first
Op talks about his family's betrayal, but he told his elders NOTHING about WHY he was breaking it off. He does not get to say anything about betrayal when he tells them nothing. I notice how their tune changed when he explained how she was. This is on Op in regard to his family. But I think he should probably tell the woman's father the real story too, so that the father can get confirmation on the most likely reason why she has an ex.
Sadly I doubt her family or OP's have learned anything from this. Anyone can apologize, but if they don't realize that they should've minded their own business and didn't try to force OP to get back with a toxic partner , then their apology means nothing. Even if they didn't know the situation, they should've trusted OP's decision and let it go.
Story 1: Bashing and trying to get the OP away from his family, bashing her family and comparing the OP to her ex and every solution to a problem isn't good enough. Sounds like classic psychological abuse. Why is the ex's family freaking out when the father seemed to have such a loose iteration of the traditional courting agreement that it sounded like he didn't think this relationship would work. I can guess that the ex's family wants to the OP to stay with and marry the ex because she's so aweful. maybe find and ask the ex's ex what happened with their break-up if possible. Tell the ex's family the reason so their little princess can't twist the story. Always tell your family/friends why you broke things off. Never let the other person twist things.
You wanna know why my husband married me? Because when he had it hard, i was his peace.. when i had it hard, he was my comfort.. that's how it should be in relationships! If you can't be someone's peace of mind, at least don't be the stressor.. Been 21yrs married now, with three amazing kids! My husband is my best friend!
I have a friend Dave who didn’t have the spine to stand up to the pressure. And now he’s been stuck in Herb dead marriage or something like 25 years. Don’t be like Dave OP.
OP, I am happy that you got out of that relationship but you could have saved yourself a lot of heartache and bad feelings if you had told your parents what was going on way before you did. Some of the stress you suffered is totally on you for not being open to your family. Maybe lesson learned for next time?
Story 1: Get that $8,000 ring back. I am a female adult, and I would NEVER allow a man to spend that much on a ring or any other piece of jewellry. I would not even allow a man to spend that much in total for ALL of my jewellry combined.
Okay I'm glad you got away from a bad situation but you can't blame your parents for their reaction because they reacted without having all the facts from you, from how you described your parents just telling them the full truth would have saved your whole family that unnecessary stress.
Always pay for your own wedding. If the parents pay, it will be used as leverage to force you to marry her no matter what she does. But the parents will only spend that much, because they expect their daughter to legally steal even more from you.
WTF is this 🎪. We have the same ceremony in my culture. But no one treats as actual marriage. Not even an official engagement. Her and her family's behavior is very questionable.
Story 1 too many red flags to even count with this girl OP you are better off without her in your life. and I am glad that you have a spine to stick to your guns and not go back to that brat. Best of luck in the future OP.
Jesus! Forget Bridezilla! OP's ex-fianceè Linda is an absolute nightmare! >.< I don't know what OP's culture is, but OP should stick to his guns full stop. I'm willing to bet that her parents are begging OP and his parents to reconsider because they know she's a crazy, spoiled bratty woman and they're at the very least partly responsible for it. And now they want her married off so she's finally out of their hair. In any case, OP should stand his ground and not cave in to peer pressure. After Update: I'm so happy OP stood his ground. Good for him. 😊 I had a feeling his family wasn't getting the whole story or rather a different story. Glad he told them the truth, not that he needed to explain himself, but it's good to do so just in case. Now Bridezilla and her parents will have to face the fact that the relationship is OVER. And I'm sure that this won't be the last time she drives off a good match with her spoiled bratty behavior. (٥↼_↼)
I used to date a girl who accused me of cheating every single day for a year till I dumped her. She was pissed she stormed into my apartment screaming where is she as she was tearing up my place trying to find a girl who was never there
The easiest answer to shutting down the phone calls is to get an airhorn and earplugs. Every time you receive a harassing call, put in the earplugs and blow the airhorn into the receiver.
Yeah that girl wasn't doing any "get to know you" stuff, she was betting on a sure thing. In her position she must have been desperate to get married and telling him it was "just to get to know eachother" was a total ruse. If only she managed to keep her mouth shut until she was really married. She's her families problem.
who drives 1500 miles to return merchandise? Your time, gas, wear and tear on the car, it makes no sense. The cities with the highest sales tax (city + state) is about 10%, and the places with the lowest sales tax is 0%. So the difference on say on $1000 is $100. It makes zero sense to drive 1500 miles to "save" $100, clearly as it will almost certainly cost that much in gasoline. Plus, was she going to sleep in the car or get a hotel? So not only is she rude, but Karen can't do math.
I would just like to say, we westerners don't suffer in silence, we're loud and have an audience to our misery. OP should've told his family long before it got to that point. Even OP admits he hid everything and his family thought they were doing well then suddenly he broke it off. If I was his family I'd be worried too. People need help, we need support. Handling everything on your own is just not smart, emotionally or economically.
Debbie drove all day... to save 2 and a half dollars? She spent more money getting there than she would have saved if she'd been able to save any, poor woman, the education system really failed her
Let this adage sink in. "Why set yourself on fire to keep others warm?" Why are you second guessing yourself if you know you can't stand her. And it's your mental and emotional health that are at stake. There are some people you are not supposed to have in your life. You've ended it. Be a man of integrity and remain steadfast and stoic so you can look your future self in the eye years later.
He should have been honest with his parents from the get-go and explained what was going on with her so that they would understand why he broke it off with her. They probably wouldn't have harassed him like they did if he had done so.
This is likely the first time this pampered woman-child has ever been told "no". Of course she's throwing a fit, and all her enablers are sick of her, and desperately trying to dump her off on OP. He cannot back down, or he'll be miserable for years. "No" is a complete sentence, no explaining. Make it clear the matter is not up for discussion, start blocking people. Updates: I'm so glad OP stuck to his guns. But he's right to feel betrayed by his family. Why do they need an explanation, beyond "I wasn't happy with her"? Their stress caused him to fail the exam. I hope he can move out.
You cannot NOT tell your support system about the problem, then act shocked they don't have the tools to protect and support you, and calling it a "betrayal" 🙄
I know this is just my western ignorance talking but wow... this kind of engagement is like fully signing and paying for a house, with out looking at, not knowing any info about it or an inspection...
Reading the title,maybe OP's ex family realize that their daughter is the problem and then they harassing OP because they didn't want to deal with her crap anymore. Is that it?
Yup.
They’re just going to past her over to someone else
Exactly!😂
Undoubtedly. Happens all the time.
@@OldManAndTheSeaOfTooManyCats That is their own fault for raising an entitled brat.
That's what I thought as I listened to the story. Her parents and family want to be rid of the monster they created (as @AnimeWolfgamer suggests)
Biggest red flag is a grown woman being jealous of a thirteen-year-old. I would be brutally honest with Linda and tell her that she brings nothing but drama to the table and I don't like her, let alone love her.
Excuse my west, but it is so screwed up for your whole family to come after you for a relationship you don't want. Wanting to see your kids happy and married is one thing, but OP made it clear he wouldn't be happy with her. All this during his final exam week?! I'd be crushed too.
Welcome to East. Our parents still think marriage is ultimate and one true happiness. Things are improving but there is still long way to go.
This doesn't sound like an arranged marriage. The process, the names, the phrases all make it sound like one of those Jehovas witnesses, Christian Scientists, LDS and so many other who also refer to the rest of us as the "west" . We have them here in Chile and Argentina too.
Agreed. What more explanation do they need, beyond "I wasn't happy with her"?
@@damiencastillo6216 I think that you're right.
This happens in the west, trust me. Sunk cost fallacy is particularly prevalent in USA lol.
I understand OP not wanting to have his family influence his opinion but he already knew he wanted to break things off. I'm glad OP shared the whole situation with his family, and they were supportive!
AFTERWARDS.
I kind of think OP caused most of his headache by not telling anyone in his family the reason. He even admits that on the outside it was a perfect relationship. The family is worried he's making a mistake or may have cold feet or something else.
Cant really be mad at your loved ones trying to keep you from making a mistake.
Yeah that's one of the things about the story that gets me. If your family is talking to you about it, seems rather weird not to just say why you don't want to be engaged anymore. I get not feeling the need to justify yourself to the ex's family, but if I broke up with someone I wouldn't hesitate to tell people still in my life why. Unless there's some underlying issue between the original poster and their family we don't have context for that would lead to him not wanting to be honest. From the outside I can't blame them for thinking that he's making a mistake.
I disagree. I guarantee the parents wouldn't have believed OP, accused him of overreacting, minimized him with platitudes like "no one's perfect" etc. Nothing short of a full meltdown would have snapped them out of it.
She did PLENTY of things that were no-nos even in that culture. He should have told them.
@@DrownedInExile Except, no. If they would've done that, they would've called OP's meltdown "overly dramatic" and went on minimizing.
This. He kept on emphasizing how he was trying to take the high road by keeping quiet about his fiance's behavior but all he was doing was shooting himself in the foot to keep the peace. This guy needs to learn how to communicate better so that others don't take advantage of the situation to force him into making decisions he doesn't want. Honestly, this wasn't a western perspective problem. He just thought he could have handled this fiance problem by himself and it eventually got so bad that it eventually blew up in his face. All the while he was putting on a show that the relationship was still going good while it most certainly wasn't. Just not smart. I'm just rolling my eyes at the part where he says he felt the sting of betrayal from his family but he's the one who put himself in that sort of situation where he isolated himself from them. They can't know what's going on if he never tells him anything. And he even admits that they would have pushed him to leave her if he told them the truth too.
Guess we know why her dad insisted on the archaic betrothal ceremony, he knows his daughter is hell on wheels & is determined to make it someone else's problem despite her parents being the reason she's like this in the first place.
Guess he figured he'd cover all his cultural and legal bases that way, in case some groom-to-be tries to wiggle out of the arrangement because some part of the ceremony wasn't followed to the letter later. Still didn't seem to matter, though (hee hee).
A good answer to the "you're not getting any younger" arguement is "Yeah, I thought about that and decided that even if they are the last person I ever date, I would prefer to remain alone."
Thinking about it that way really puts the situation in perspective for some reason.
OP’s mistake was not telling his family she was a nutcase.
Yeah..."Fly 1000 miles and get engaged to someone you don't know." Now I know why her family wanted a groom that lives that far away - so he can take her back with him. 😂
Oh man, this made me think of one of my favorite lines from one of my fave short stories: "A Good Man is Hard To Find" from Flannery O'Connor. When the convict finally kills the loudmouthed old lady that kept making everything worse, he said, “She would've been a good woman... if it had been somebody there to shoot her every minute of her life.”
lmao rt
Idk how you even meet someone that lives that far away. Frankly, that would be an instant no for me to even date. It would be a logistical nightmare. Married life would consist of not being near at least one of the families and of course dating would be a headache.
I love Flannery OConneror 😊@@tallyp.7643
“I’m not marrying her dad!” Exactly! … Unless … 🤔 (jk, lol.) I’m glad OP stuck to his guns and didn’t go through with the engagement. Can’t imagine spending the rest of my life with “crazy” … exactly why ex’s family was so damn eager to give her away!
I hope there’s a way for OP to retake that final exam, because EVERYONE chipped in fricking that up.
Lol I only read the title and I’m laughing. I find it funny when people are so toxic their own family doesn’t want them back. Hope she sees the error of her ways and stops this lunacy before she nukes any future relationships.
Though with her age, that is very unlikely that she will change. I blame her parents, they created that monster and are probably doing nothing to change her and keep on enabling that type of behavior.
Yeah. Right. As if.
@@toportime Yep. They probably spoiled her rotten and now they're still not doing anything to correct her behavior. At this point, I don't know if therapy can help her because most people are usually developed by their thirties right?
The family of bridezilla are very desperate to force him to get back together with her just so they don’t they don’t have to deal with the whining, crying, bitching, and yelling from their very entitled and enabled child. I wonder if this toxic narcissist was only dating OP just so she can get him to propose and have her dream wedding where she is the center of attention like she wanted all along while OP suffers in the background.
Well too bad. They raise her to be like this brat, they will lie in it.
Aren't 60%+ of women now dating exactly just so they can get that?
Well, we can see that was dad’s agenda just by him pressing OP to be officially engaged to his brat of a daughter before he could even think about “dating” her. Dad knew what she was like and didn’t want any guy getting to “really” know her by dating her without a way to make him commit to a marriage! Disgusting of her family to try to trick a guy into a torturous marriage with a harpy 😡
@@pippo17173 So true! And I'm sure that this won't be the last time she drives off a good match with her spoiled bratty behavior. (٥↼_↼)
OP would have saved himself a lot of heartache if he just told his parents the reasons why he was not marrying her in the first place. It may not be their place, but it doesn't matter since she will be a stranger to them, and their opinions and feelings will no longer matter.
It wouldn't have made any difference. Parents wouldn't have taken him seriously, downplayed his concerns, spewed platitudes like "no one's perfect".
The worst thing any parent can do is to force their children to be with or take back an ex that they don't want. My parents did that twice and ultimately it became a freaking nightmare and THEN they realized how stupid they were for not minding their business.
Everytime I hear stories like this I feel so grateful that while I love my parents and family their wants for my love life and really life in general mean absolutely nothing to me
I think in story 1 op dodged a bullet, however I wonder why he did not tell his parents about the reason of the break up from the beginning? is it that difficult to tell your own family you break the relationship bc of the reasons you are not guilty of? it is as if OP was feeling the worst person on the planet bc he stood up for himself. another thing - his parents . why the did not support their own child from the beginning? would they prefer seeing him in loveless marriage rather than happy single? they should have known to support their son when he opposed for the first time. Good for op to realize this was not it, and not to bend under the social pressure.
It wouldn't have made any difference if OP told his parents sooner. They wouldn't have taken him seriously, accused him of being childish and overreacting, given him platitudes like "no one's perfect" etc. Nothing short of a full meltdown would have gotten past their stubbornness.
@@DrownedInExile I think part of it was actually a social pressure. In the name of: " what people would think of us" many people were forced into arranged marriages just because sp called " honour of family" was more important than a living person.
What hit me though is that a parent did not even try to defend the decision of his own child but turned against him instead.
What do you mean? When OP initially said he wanted to break up, his parents basically said, "About time." They changed their tune later after the fiance's family started harassing them. Folks will twist into all sorts of knots to stop harassment, especially when they don't have all the facts. They sided with him as soon as he explained how miserable he was.
Story 1 : The ex parents know that the chick is a complete stitch and they're trying to make op into a patsy aka " please take her off our hands we can't handle what a witch she is".. op DO NOT NOW OR EVER BACK DOWN UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES..
oh hell no never exp after the degrading things she let be done to her in prn vids
MAN SO MANY SIGNS SHE IS JUST SPOILT SHE NEEDED 2 PARTIES THAT WAS A MASSIVE RED FLAG!!!
"He just wants to see me married and happy". There's a rare combination these days.
Huh!!!! Am I missing something??? Bridezilla? she’s not a bridezilla, there is no wedding planning 😮 she sounds more like Godzilla herself, and to get married for anything else but love is stupid.
“WE want you to be happy, please marry a psychopath” blah
🤣🤣🤣 I wonder if her screeches sound like Godzilla's.
I feel like that’s an insult to Godzilla.
@@chuuu4610 RIGHT!!!! I’m so sorry..lol
no no its FATZILLA SAPTCILLAS
I love your videos @Lost Genre Stories. Thank you for your efforts. I’m just commenting to offer as much support as I can 😁
#metoo
Thank you both for your support! :)
I feel like OP’s family were worried he got cold feet or had commitment issues or something… I mean, granted, your parents don’t need to be involved in your love life, but since his culture expects the parents to be involved from the beginning, he would probably have avoided a lot of heartache by letting them know early on. And thankfully they were fully supportive! And apologetic! Rare in these stories lmao
"I care for her, I really do, but I CAN'T STAND HER.". 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Story 1: Seriously wish I could slap OP. At least in the end, after breaking down and failing exam, he finally told the truth, what he should have done from the beginning.
Right. Op sounds like a caring person but good grief just admit you do not like this woman. She is not for you. People will understand.
Yes, he should tell everything in the beginning. However, his parents suck, they were bombarding him and demanding for him to take back his awful ex instead of asking for why he leaved her.
@@DomSte128 to be fair, he didn't tell the truth about the ex to his family.
You really think that would have made a difference? I can all but guarantee the parents would have minimized his feelings, doubted him, hit him with platitudes like "no one's perfect", etc. Nothing short of a full on meltdown or strong action would have snapped them out of it.
@@DrownedInExile When he told the truth it sounds like his parents listened and changed opinion. Before that he made her look like a perfect and wonderful girlfriend because he lacked a spine to tell the truth.
“YOU’RE NOT MARRYING HER DAD” was also the first thing my brain was screaming the more LG read this story. 😂this whole “think of her dad/family/pet chihuahua” is defo an Asian thing (he’s probably somewhere from South Asia). He should have totally told his mom and dad the whole deal in the first place. The “keeping her honor” thing has limits. This being that limit.
Imagine being such a nightmare of a person that your entire family is trying to hot-potato you into being someone else's problem so desperately.
Just when I'm listening to one of your videos while doing dailies in videogames, you drop another one! Thank you for quality content and greetings from Czech Republic!
I’m refinishing a bar right now, thanks for giving me something to listen to, LG!
The ex's parents are just terrified of her being their problem forever, lol
They made this monster, it's all on them now.
Good for OP
If they want to get rid of her so badly, they could start by giving her the parenting she should've gotten years and make her get a job and her own place. It might be too late to change her behavior, but I don't think it's too late to start making her be an adult. And I'm sure that she won't find herself a husband with the spoiled bratty behavior she has.
@@PrincessQ-fj9ly I think they are many years too late to change this spoiled demon they created lol
The only family members' on OP's side was his siblings, they'd be the only one he should be comfortable talking with. The rest should reconsider their actions until OP is ready to talk to them.
That being said, It honestly sucks he didn't want to tell him family anything, just to show he's an adult and can handle his own business, but the minute the Fiancé's parent got involved, OP should of told his parents.
Hell I'd have told my parents prior if I knew someone was negative/bitter person, as I have no reason to belive they wouldn't spread lies about me. It sounds like she lied about the sister and wanted a second party so she could easily make up horrible stuff. Cheating, forceful 'passionately hugging', abuse, etc.
Reading this story reminds of of something I heard on a comedy show
“To my new son-in-law, you have released me, this monster is yours now.”
"You can't expect everyone to be perfect!" True but OP can do soo much better than Veruca Salt.
I think the best answer to anybody trying to force anyone into an arranged marriage is, "Where does it say that I've got to be unhappy for the rest of my life just to make YOU happy". If a marriage is arranged, it's doubly-important to make sure that all parties are happy as the repercussions of failure scatter in a much wider arc to hurt both families as well. Just one 'no' should always be enough.
Good on you for dropping a mean girl. We know why she has an ex boyfriend. Run!!!!! Spoiled, selfish people don’t make good spouses or parents.parents are sick of the monster they raised. They want someone to take her off their hands. Anyone would do. Tell your parents the truth
Story 2. I KNEW exactly where it was going. Sales also change constantly and I’ve done that when I worked in retail. Priceless!
I find it hilarious that the woman drove 1,500 miles to save $2.50!
Now, maybe she was visiting the other place and had just gotten back, but it still doesn't make much sense.
Even if gas was only $2/gallon and her car got 30mpg, that's a total of 37.5 miles for the round trip. That means going more than 18.625 miles out of her way meant she'd end up losing money.
Poor OP, getting sucked into such a hellish experience for something that was entered into as an engagement "in name only". I hope that he's learned to find his spine earlier when things start going off the rails. And to not enter into that ceremony unless he really means it. He really should have told his parents what was going on earlier, especially when he had made the decision to end things. At that point, the deed was done, so there couldn't have been any influence after the fact.
Honestly sometimes some parents just forget while commenting on any relationship let alone their own child's is that- they don't know the other person as much as their child/the person who is arguing do. They cannot. So taking sides because someone else insists is horrible thing to do no matter how much it comes from the "right place".
The only thing OP crushed was her ego, and her family was so happy to pawn her off to someone and they're panicking that it might not happen. The sad part is they're partially responsible for her spoilt, selfish and entitled behavior. I hope OP ran and kept on running, and when he stops, he finds someone who is a better fit.
Guys, a word of advice - NEVER marry anyone whose own family can't wait to get off their hands!
I kinda of get where OP was coming from because he wanted to be mature and try to handle everything on his own, to feel like he had his own identity. However OP has a strong family background so there is nothing wrong with telling the family some of the issues in the relationship because they were supportive about the break-up initially. If OP just explained it to his family like how he did to reddit half of this drama could have been avoided.
yeah... if getting a call from them is giving you the bad kind of anxiety during the courtship period, that's a pretty good indicator that it's not meant to be.
I wouldn’t talk to my entire family for a long time after this. J no ow granted Op should have explained the reason why he called it off because even though she didn’t do this, she could have made up accusations about why they called everything off. But back to the main point, I don’t care how worn down they were from his ex’s trash family, you don’t try to get anyone to marry someone who has been terrible to then just because you’re sick of their family.
OP is right to feel betrayed. Even if he had told his parents the truth - which he wasn't obligated to - they wouldn't have accepted it. They would have said he's overreacting, no one's perfect, etc. I hope he moves out.
@@DrownedInExileI keep on seeing you everywhere in the comments saying the same thing, but it's clear his family would've supported him if he told them the truth. You can't act like your relationship is perfect and then leave without explaining it to your family. He's at fault for how things ended up...
Her family is trying their best to get anyone to take her off their hands. They've already failed once to accomplish that. OP's father can always tell her father that OP never listens to him.that
Lmao nice. Driving all that way just to pay more 😆
OP wouldn't tell the families involved, but he'd tell a world of strangers via reddit?
OP should have told his parents the crap his ex did to him from the beginning so that they wouldn’t have put so much pressure on them, I’m giving them the benefit of the doubt that they wouldn’t have tried get their son back with the Bridezilla if they had known. His update definitely makes it sound like they would have had his back. I hope OP was able to make up for the bad exam.
Ask to sit down with the father and explain it to him. Don’t let him make excuses, just tell him this is not a negotiation, this is me being up front and allowing you to hear the issues that are going to come up with the next guy. That he might need to have a talk with her ex to see his side too. Then he can help address the issue with his daughter to help her in the future.
Bridezilla needs to grow up before getting into a relationship.
Family: "Please take her back".
Translation: "Please take her off our hands!"
OP: Cut them all out and go no contact and for a long holiday. Life's too short.
Two great stories, LG!
"Deciding whether you want to be in a relationship or not is one of the few times in life when you are allowed to think ONLY about what you want and no one else." This is wisdom for the ages.
I mean, yes and no. If you're married with kids and one moment you wake up and go "I am the only one who can decide if I want to be in a relationship!!" ... Maybe some councillor shipping first
Op talks about his family's betrayal, but he told his elders NOTHING about WHY he was breaking it off. He does not get to say anything about betrayal when he tells them nothing. I notice how their tune changed when he explained how she was.
This is on Op in regard to his family. But I think he should probably tell the woman's father the real story too, so that the father can get confirmation on the most likely reason why she has an ex.
Sadly I doubt her family or OP's have learned anything from this. Anyone can apologize, but if they don't realize that they should've minded their own business and didn't try to force OP to get back with a toxic partner , then their apology means nothing. Even if they didn't know the situation, they should've trusted OP's decision and let it go.
Story 1: Bashing and trying to get the OP away from his family, bashing her family and comparing the OP to her ex and every solution to a problem isn't good enough. Sounds like classic psychological abuse. Why is the ex's family freaking out when the father seemed to have such a loose iteration of the traditional courting agreement that it sounded like he didn't think this relationship would work. I can guess that the ex's family wants to the OP to stay with and marry the ex because she's so aweful. maybe find and ask the ex's ex what happened with their break-up if possible. Tell the ex's family the reason so their little princess can't twist the story. Always tell your family/friends why you broke things off. Never let the other person twist things.
You wanna know why my husband married me? Because when he had it hard, i was his peace.. when i had it hard, he was my comfort.. that's how it should be in relationships! If you can't be someone's peace of mind, at least don't be the stressor.. Been 21yrs married now, with three amazing kids! My husband is my best friend!
I have a friend Dave who didn’t have the spine to stand up to the pressure. And now he’s been stuck in Herb dead marriage or something like 25 years. Don’t be like Dave OP.
Tell everyone the honest truth. She's negative, disrespectful to everyone you care about, and entirely uncontrolled and immature.
Laughing at the ring and little sister kerfuffle.
OP, I am happy that you got out of that relationship but you could have saved yourself a lot of heartache and bad feelings if you had told your parents what was going on way before you did. Some of the stress you suffered is totally on you for not being open to your family. Maybe lesson learned for next time?
Last story this is a true story - have been on line behind that kind of customer and oh boy my heart instantly goes to the salesperson - sheesh 😊
You can be a lesson. You can even be a blessing. But you will never be the prize.
Why did the father give her extra money to purchase the ring she wanted. The father did not respect your boundaries. RUN RUN RUN she is a nightmare.
I don't get why so many people think that someone has to be MARRIED to be happy.
She had to pay more I love it.
I think this is less a matter of spine and more a matter of noise cancelling headphones...
ROFLOL Omgosh I can't breathe 🤣🤣🤣THIS!!
Story 1: Get that $8,000 ring back. I am a female adult, and I would NEVER allow a man to spend that much on a ring or any other piece of jewellry. I would not even allow a man to spend that much in total for ALL of my jewellry combined.
Poor OP1, he really went through the wringer.
Okay I'm glad you got away from a bad situation but you can't blame your parents for their reaction because they reacted without having all the facts from you, from how you described your parents just telling them the full truth would have saved your whole family that unnecessary stress.
Always pay for your own wedding. If the parents pay, it will be used as leverage to force you to marry her no matter what she does. But the parents will only spend that much, because they expect their daughter to legally steal even more from you.
I’m glad you got away from her and her family OP
hahaha, I would love to see a video of her reaction at the new total at the hobby store!
How you can tell I'm a college student: The part of the story that hit me most was when he got a 40 percent on his final exam. I feel for you, brother
WTF is this 🎪.
We have the same ceremony in my culture. But no one treats as actual marriage. Not even an official engagement. Her and her family's behavior is very questionable.
Story 1 too many red flags to even count with this girl OP you are better off without her in your life. and I am glad that you have a spine to stick to your guns and not go back to that brat. Best of luck in the future OP.
Jesus! Forget Bridezilla! OP's ex-fianceè Linda is an absolute nightmare! >.< I don't know what OP's culture is, but OP should stick to his guns full stop. I'm willing to bet that her parents are begging OP and his parents to reconsider because they know she's a crazy, spoiled bratty woman and they're at the very least partly responsible for it. And now they want her married off so she's finally out of their hair. In any case, OP should stand his ground and not cave in to peer pressure.
After Update: I'm so happy OP stood his ground. Good for him. 😊 I had a feeling his family wasn't getting the whole story or rather a different story. Glad he told them the truth, not that he needed to explain himself, but it's good to do so just in case. Now Bridezilla and her parents will have to face the fact that the relationship is OVER. And I'm sure that this won't be the last time she drives off a good match with her spoiled bratty behavior. (٥↼_↼)
Wow OP’s fiancée was an exhausting child who liked to have tantrums. Missile Dodged.
I used to date a girl who accused me of cheating every single day for a year till I dumped her. She was pissed she stormed into my apartment screaming where is she as she was tearing up my place trying to find a girl who was never there
No is a complete sentence. Tell her NO, walk away and close contact.
Aw, geez. Linda sounds like a handful, to say the least. 🙄
That's putting it MILDLY. 😅
Wooo buddy! I wish OP's Ex luck trying to hook a patsy in the future. She keeps up like that and she'll end up an old maid. 😆
The easiest answer to shutting down the phone calls is to get an airhorn and earplugs. Every time you receive a harassing call, put in the earplugs and blow the airhorn into the receiver.
Yeah that girl wasn't doing any "get to know you" stuff, she was betting on a sure thing. In her position she must have been desperate to get married and telling him it was "just to get to know eachother" was a total ruse. If only she managed to keep her mouth shut until she was really married. She's her families problem.
who drives 1500 miles to return merchandise? Your time, gas, wear and tear on the car, it makes no sense. The cities with the highest sales tax (city + state) is about 10%, and the places with the lowest sales tax is 0%. So the difference on say on $1000 is $100. It makes zero sense to drive 1500 miles to "save" $100, clearly as it will almost certainly cost that much in gasoline. Plus, was she going to sleep in the car or get a hotel?
So not only is she rude, but Karen can't do math.
I would just like to say, we westerners don't suffer in silence, we're loud and have an audience to our misery. OP should've told his family long before it got to that point. Even OP admits he hid everything and his family thought they were doing well then suddenly he broke it off. If I was his family I'd be worried too. People need help, we need support. Handling everything on your own is just not smart, emotionally or economically.
This could have been a 5 minute story if he had just told the truth to his family right away.
At the first part, it sound like her parents want to wed her off so they don't have to deal with her BS anymore.
Op should have asked to use the parent's phones & block her parents.
S1 nta, they aren't naive, they know she's insane and conning you is their best chance to hand her off.
*reads title* run from da toxicity OP ruuuuuun 🏃♂️
That's what I said, RUUUUUN FORREST RUUUUUN!! 🤣I said that bitch has a demon and her parents know it and they want that Omen out they house!! Lol
Linda and her family are crazy!
Debbie drove all day... to save 2 and a half dollars? She spent more money getting there than she would have saved if she'd been able to save any, poor woman, the education system really failed her
Let this adage sink in. "Why set yourself on fire to keep others warm?" Why are you second guessing yourself if you know you can't stand her. And it's your mental and emotional health that are at stake. There are some people you are not supposed to have in your life. You've ended it. Be a man of integrity and remain steadfast and stoic so you can look your future self in the eye years later.
He should have been honest with his parents from the get-go and explained what was going on with her so that they would understand why he broke it off with her. They probably wouldn't have harassed him like they did if he had done so.
In the end they don't care what he wants, they care about what their culture wants.
Run, buddy, run!
This is likely the first time this pampered woman-child has ever been told "no". Of course she's throwing a fit, and all her enablers are sick of her, and desperately trying to dump her off on OP. He cannot back down, or he'll be miserable for years. "No" is a complete sentence, no explaining. Make it clear the matter is not up for discussion, start blocking people.
Updates: I'm so glad OP stuck to his guns. But he's right to feel betrayed by his family. Why do they need an explanation, beyond "I wasn't happy with her"? Their stress caused him to fail the exam. I hope he can move out.
You cannot NOT tell your support system about the problem, then act shocked they don't have the tools to protect and support you, and calling it a "betrayal" 🙄
She's a spoiled child. You did the right thing.
I know this is just my western ignorance talking but wow... this kind of engagement is like fully signing and paying for a house, with out looking at, not knowing any info about it or an inspection...
Story 1, so you did get to know her and found her to be a collection of red flags