Who's an INFJ here? Which indicator are you? Also, Shoutout to Sosyncd for sponsoring today's video so meet compatible personality matches today app.sosyncd.com/BdNN/4Psych2Go
As an INFJ all of these are very true haha. Another problem I think we have ( or at least for me) is that we friend zone ourselves pretty quickly or we think, “It would be easier if we’re just friends.” because INFJs just know how to naturally be a good friend, so we would rather stick to what’s comfortable rather then try and develop something new with someone. Again that could just be me 😂 We may be single, yet we still give the best advice when it comes to dating..make it make sense lmao Edit: Jeez a lot of my fellow INFJs liked this comment 😂 Don’t worry guys, we’ll get through this together haha. Single or not we have something better..the power of friendship haha Edit #2: Just so you guys know I am reading the comments on this. You guys are awesome and deserve everything in life 💙
1.)You won’t settle for anyone other than your dream person-0:44 2.)You stress over small things-1:46 3.)You wait for others to make the first move-2:18 SoSyncd(sponsorship)-2:48 4.)You can be very stubborn-3:56 5.)You see past fake acts-4:24 6.)You don’t do casual-4:57 7.) Dating is a pain for you-5:30
I know that as an INFJ, I hold myself and others to SUCH insanely high standards, that nobody could possibly live up to my fantasies of an ideal partner.
Omg same! Then I will try to lower my standards and think in realistic terms and be so irritated😖 because I'm still on the look out for this "special person" being a hopeless romantic doesn't help me either. But I'm trying to be better at this by writing out realistic qualities and trying not to have expectations.
Ask yourself this: why this dream person of yours should choose you? Even if you have same things what you want from him. Manifesting what you want from a partner also doesn't mean that you will get that person but at least this way you already have what you wanted. So compromises are important, and with time and effort by growing together you can develop missing things. Plus, what do you mean by hopeless romantic? Do you expect to get in mainly from some else or you also would like to make romantic acts, reciprocate equally? By the way, I'm INFP.
As fellow INFJ who is happily married gonna give some realistic feedback to this. We do the fall for idea of person and have unrealistic standards. Inferior SE does that, have to be realistic about our standards tbh
I think it depends on the people you know... Maybe even your culture... Here in latinamerica most people I know would not jokingly wish you good luck for even try to have a more formal and serius relationship that involves actual feelings instead of just being in one just for the sake of having sex... The later example is normally seen as "living the life" or something "normal" than any person (mostly men) would want for the rest of their lifes, never having the need to actually be in a real relationship... Personally I don't understand how can you ever think that way but anyways, everyone has their own tastes, just as there are people that want to throw up after seeing a couple demostrate affection for each other there are other people (like me) that lives daydreaming with romance and love dovey stuff even when not having a crush.
Those who enjoy being single have already had relationships before. I've never had one. I wouldn't say I enjoy being single, but I enjoy life and enjoy being good and spreading kindness to others and seeing if those seeds will spread to others and they will spread kindness to others as a result. Luckily I currently am at a place in life where I teach really young children, so they have boundless love and it is easy to influence them to spread kindness to others. I take this opportunity to prepare me for my fatherhood someday if I can ever actually get the courage to make the first move on someone I like.
6. “you don’t do casual” as an INFJ, I relate to this one a lot, as I do tend to more prefer committing to things that I find having a purpose in, spending time and effort into something “casual” or something without a clear purpose just sounds wasteful and draining. still single 💀💀, but least there’s friends :) i might delete this later update: I am NO LONGER SINGLE
Nah don't I relate to this alot, "why would I waste time on something your not sure about" yeah that's true along the lines being indulge with the stuff you find massively interesting is already love has well thank you.
I’m an INFJ too... 26-years-old and never dated before. I saw myself in this video except for the part of being afraid to take the first step because while growing up I always expressed my feelings to the boys I liked. Turns out that I was either friendzoned or laughed at and maybe that’s why I became more reserved and afraid. There’s nothing wrong with being single but sometimes I feel lonely and cry a lot wondering what’s wrong with me to not be able to get someone’s attention... Maybe that will change someday, let’s hope. I want to believe that I deserve love too. Sorry for this, I needed to get it out of my chest 😅 Maybe someone reading this had the same experience. Thank you for your videos, they truly help a lot in making us understand us better, both physically and mentally ❤️ P.S: to all of you in the comments experiencing the same feelings, remember that you're unique, awesome and beautiful and life will find a way to reward you with the love you dream so much about! Love you!
off course they will friend zone or laughing at you, men don't like to be chased. let them come to you 1st. This video doesn't do justice for female INFJ. I think it applies more to male INFJ.
As a male, albeit an INFJ, I would not mind my partner being the first to act. It feels nice to know that they want it enough to say something when you are too scared to
@@fireeye33 ENFP, have to disagree. I love women to be interesting, active and approachable, very attractive trait. This needs to be followed by them being stimulating to talk to, but that is usually no problem with INFJs.
@@Elgard2 you're talking about women reciprocate by appropriately corresponding to you. I'm talking about a woman CHASING. Actually men who likes to be chased are a simp beta male.
I’ve had that same experience, I sometimes feel I’m incompetent and not good enough to deserve a relationship, so I try ignoring that possibility whenever an opportunity strikes, despite hoping for someone to make a move... It does hurt, alot.. So I hope you receive all the love and attention that you deserve, and don’t think you don’t deserve it, you do, give yourself a break.
Remember that knowing your personality type is a way that you can use to know yourself and improve. Don't use your personality type like a excuse to not grow, mainly because it's really easy to misunderstand the INFJ cause of the rarity stuff. You are incredible and amazing just the way you are, and if you think that you can be a INFJ or relate to any point of this video, don't take it for granted! Do what's better for you, and be patient with your own process. Stay safe everyone! 🌿
Am honestly disappointed. Myers Briggs are popular but as always, popular =/ quality. The people who invented the *theory* weren't qualified. Please don't label yourself like that. People are too complex. And if you're nothing like an INFJ, and just share traits because trauma hinders your true self, you can suffer even more by using it as an excuse. This video screams sellout to me.
@@ensco7 True, I guess the MBTI theory can really be beneficial if you use it like a way to know yourself more, instead of labelling, and all of this stuff about rare = special can really make people push themselves too much to identify like a INFJ, when actually people with this personality type tend to struggle with a lot of things and are very misunderstood. I guess this make all the personality types seems like closed boxes, when actually you can be a INFJ but have a lot of characteristics of a INFP, ENFJ or a ISFJ, because as you said people are complex and trying to force yourself to one pattern can be really destructive.
Thank you. 💗 I sincerely wish you the best as well (genuine, intelligent-empath; that ISN'T a Cluster-B/narcissit/NPD in disguise)! 😊 ~seriously, thank you. PS: the world needs to rid itself of cluster-b permanently - along with the narcissitic-codependants/evil enablers (who tend to be genuinely, unintelligent-codependant that have small 'frontal-lobe').
@@ianmatheus7178 The Myers Briggs is actually accurate! Seriously! Please don't listen to that other guy! Smh. He's likely one of the 'undesirable-personality' type (ESFJ/ESTJ; very manipulative, little moral compass, they make the worst narcissits irl, FYI) or someone with narcissitic personality disorder! Any intelligent person who attempts to analyse people's personality and relationship preference know the Myer Brigg is accurate! 😀 It gives people a strong idea into how certain personality types mind behave and their preference - which is invaluable! Evil personality types prey and study people's personalities. The Myer Brigg exposes these evil, manipulative types, i.e. ESFJ/ESTJ; even without narcissitic personality disorder, they love to observe, study, PREY/VIOLATE people's minds! This is why they love being "popular", it feeds their ego and gives them potential 'pawns'; that they can weaponise against others!
It's really nice to see this video. As a 21 year old who has never been in a relationship or even had my first kiss, it's really good to have a psychological reason for this. Just one minute in and I all ready feel less abnormal. Thank you so much for everything you guys do
@@Kunigunda897 Thank you, my friend! Yeah, I've always struggled with my mental health and subsequently my self esteem, but I'm beginning to work on being more open towards people now. It's tough, but I'm getting there
@@davidbrussard-composer7372, I'm glad to hear that, I'm also working with that, but your finical life is also important, so it's better to put your main focus towards that instead of dating. I'm 26 and it's getting easier, i started to get more attention than never before, although still I'm holding myself for what I expect so i don't let myself to be blinded by it if I'm mot interested in that person (girl), so I don't rush either but it's ready a sign that i have more chances to meet someone who would be good for me. And older men in their 30s says that they have more possibilities, options. And don't forget to put an efort towards your looks either, as the say looks attracts personality captivates.
INFJ here. I no longer look for nor expect love from external world or others. To me love is not about giving and receiving. Love is a state of being. One can experience continuous love by becoming love. It is our natural state of being.
I’m infj, turning 50 this year. I’ve never dated, mostly because my parents kept my under their full control at home till I was 31, and once I managed to get get out they still emotionally controlled me for another nearly another 8 years. I then got completely away but have no clue how to interact with others. I had finally decided to try hard to contact with others and the pandemic hit and I backslid into being a hermit. I’m going to have to be content with my pets, books and hobbies at this point. Humans are complicated.
I see that as a good plan. But don't worry, i pray fo you. And something unexpected will come your way. I believe that in the name of God. So may Jesus Christ bless you and your home. Whether you are religious or not, i still hope you find God you will see.. but bless you and your pets, i want pets too!!!😆😆
I am 25 and I feel the same way. Wishing you well to be truly and completely free (like I wish for myself/ fellow INFJ) and to live your best life. I find that being "free" is what we crave the most, but we never get. (Edit: And also to find a love that will nourish your soul
INFJ guy here who has done a lot of dating. For me, what makes it tough is that I don't feel understood by others - I feel like they're desperately trying to understand me, but don't really "get" it. Went through the same with last girlfriend. What makes it worse is that it's normal for me to hear that I "get" others when we can get into deeper conversation, which I crave. Can definitely be a lonesome process, but hey, I'm incurably optimistic so I just keep trying
Omg I feel this soo hard, it really can be lonely.. longing to be fully understood or atleast more understood on a deaper level. Good luck with finding someone!^-^ maybe the app can help u out:) I think its a really neat idea n opportunity
I can relate with this. Can you give us some tips that you learned so far, that does work from your experience. I'm dating a girl and doesn't want to lose her😭
I can actually relate to this so much. This video is like it was made for me. The reason why I'm single is because I'm insecure and I don't really settle for less. Thanks for this !
I would can't settle on my past trauma haven't had the best experiences with girls yet in a relationship. So I am really insecure also. Thanks for the video as always
For me it's also about motivation. I don't really feel motivated to go out there and date anyone "just because", I only feel motivated to ask someone out when I feel that there's a real connection. Over the years I've adjusted, and lowered the "standards" for what I think of as a "Real Connection", but I still come across it very rarely. I turn 32 this year, and I've felt that real connection maybe 5 times in my life, and none of those people were romantically compatible for various reasons. And when I'm not feeling the connection, I don't really mind being single - it's all I've ever known - and there are some massive benefits to being single. Those are my 2 cents as an INFJ.
I'm also an INFJ and this is exactly my experience too. It's not that I want someone who's "perfect". I think it's a bit silly to tell people their standards are "too high", because, well... What's the alternative? Be like, "OK, I don't care for this person so much, but I'm going to make them my life partner?" I'd rather be single. And yes, I do very rarely find people that I can really want very badly. But so far I've never been lucky enough that they wanted me too. As you said, it happens very rarely, maybe once every 5 years for me. Also, it makes it extremely painful because it means rejection by these people is very hard to bear. Other people will be like : "oh there are plenty of other guys!" but... NOT FOR ME, there aren't. I crave a special type of connection and it's just very hard to find it. I've almost never been in relationships but I was once in a relationship with someone who I thought was great. I was actually the one who went after him (which I rarely do, but since I fall in love so rarely, I can't really afford to lose opportunities so sometimes I will eventually go for it). It's not that I found "flaws", or that he was "not perfect" enough. There was nothing WRONG with him. But... I just wasn't in love with that person. I tried, but I couldn't force myself to care. It was horrible for both me and him. I felt guilty, and he felt unloved, and that wasn't fair to him. I'd MUCH rather be single than be back in a relationship like that one.
@@aramis5301 " What's the alternative? Be like, "OK, I don't care for this person so much, but I'm going to make them my life partner?" I'd rather be single." Exactly! I've had people say or imply "just go out there and Date! It doesn't matter who it is, you'll get better at dating because of the experiences and eventually you'll probably find someone". The problem for me is that i'm a "Quality over Quantity"-person (as I've understood is a common trait for INFJs) And so I literally don't see any point in dating people I'm not actually interested in. Plus I'd feel terrible if I dated someone, tried to "get" feelings for them, and then it not working. It sucks that you had that experience, but I'd like to ask - if you're comfortable answering - do you think it was helpful in the end? Like, did you get a deeper understanding of yourself, or how you like to date? Was there a silver lining, or was it just all around terrible? I also recognize the "Plenty of other guys" argument. I'm a guy interested in women, so the version I usually hear is more simlar to "I don't see you that way, but you're an amazing guy, and whoever ends up dating you is gonna be really lucky, there's bound to be someone". And yea, getting the rejection from the _One_ person you're interested in sucks, but at this point I'd probably be more nervous if they said "yes" to a date because it would feel like there's so much at stake.😅 I'd be super happy if it was more common/accepted that women did the asking out. I imagine having to reject someone also sucks, but I think there's definitely an imbalance here when it comes to what situation we experience in the "male" and "female" roles.
@@JokerCrowe Well, having to reject people can also be really awful, especially when so many guys are just not willing to hear the word "no" (and have been encouraged to disregard a woman's refusal or even take it as encouragement). I honestly couldn't tell which one I hate the most between getting rejected and having to reject someone (which can sometimes turn into "getting rid of a stalker"). But personally, I'll eventually confront someone who's not being clear with me or ask them out, if I see it's not going anywhere and nothing will happen if I do nothing. When I was younger, I used to do what Frank describes and just pine after someone for years from afar, and now I know that's just silly so I try not to do it anymore. As to whether that one relationship had any positive aspects... I guess I'd have to say yes. I haven't had any other relationship so I suppose I can say that at least, I've had one (that's stupid and not really a "good thing" but at least I feel less like a freak). And I've discovered that I couldn't date someone who has self-esteem issues and who tends to "idolize" me. Some people might love this, but for me, it's just super cringe. And I'm terrible at acting like a crutch for another person's self-esteem, it's just not something I can do well. Also, I realised in that case that I was intimidating to certain guys because the reason he didn't ask me out was that he was convinced I was out of his league (which really surprised me when he told me that).
I'm single because I don't find that one person who's ready to give me as much as I give them. I'm sick of always being the one compromising while they nitpick on trivial things. I'd want someone as understanding & caring as I'm.
Coincidentally, did the personality test like last week and apparently I'm an INFJ. Read about it and much of the stuff made sense. So interesting. Think I'll observe myself a bit more. 😊🤓
Number 3 is very relatable to me, and I've found that I keep waiting for others to make a move, and when I've tried to make a move, it often come across as the way I wanted to be.
I really like how you mentioned how us INFJ’s are looking for someone that connects with us mentally and also spiritually. It was the first reason you listed. It’s something I’m looking for in a girlfriend and potential wife.
Yeah-... I'm INFJ, I've been thinking for years "why can't I find anyone", or "am I not good enough?". But when I finally opened my eyes, I realized that I wasn't the problem, it was the people around me, I couldn't see myself with someone I knew, coming to the conclusion that I didn't have "romantic attraction", this made me realize that I was already happy and well even without someone.Knowing that I wasn't strange or different because I didn't find someone did me a lot of good...
Heyyy, I'm infj and I want to tell everyone that I found the love of my life and so will you!!! The funny thing is, my long-term boyfriend is entp, almost the complete opposite. Even though I don't think opposites and differences always attract each other, his personality made me stronger as I was very weak and exhausted from all the thinking and worrying about everything and everyone. He made me start taking care of myself, not just others. So maybe try something like that if you haven't already ! 😘
As a deeply introspective INFJ, I have a lot to say. I won’t settle for less, but that does not mean what I am looking for is unrealistic either. I couldn’t live with myself if I’m with someone and all I’m thinking is “I lowered my standards for you.” I don’t particularly stress over small things, but they are a factor because a lot of couples overlook things and then they end up arguing about them years later, sometimes even after they’re married. So of course I will admit I don’t do casual in the sense that I want to connect with you and see if we have similar things in mind instead of pretending everything’s all good and then figuring out we don’t really know each other. By the way, why is seeing past fake acts a bad thing? Imagine if we all had that ability. If you have to put on a fake act to begin with, I would feel kind of offended that you would think I wouldn’t see through it. Overall, we do need more honesty in this world. Less time would be wasted and less people would get their hopes crushed after having them up for so long because there wasn’t enough discussion. Relationship or no relationship, I will always have my books and animals. I’m good 😎
Exactly! I am an INFJ too and totally agree with you. The idea of lowering standards to find someone is something that makes absolutely no sense to me. It's not about judging people's "worth", anyway. It's about whether they are compatible with me. I do crave that special connection with someone and suffer from not having it, but I am also very much able to live without a partner. I've been single almost my entire life. I don't NEED a partner so badly that I would compromise my integrity and well-being to be with them.
Don’t lower your standards its not worthy it. This maybe cruel but a lot of relationships are very superficial now days. Seeing pass the fakeness is a good thing cause ignoring it may make the relationship last longer but you’ll be a sucker.
I'm still single cuz nobody bothers to go out of their way to show any interest in me let alone see how I'm doing or anything, no matter how many times I try to go out of my way to strike up first conversations or show interest and establish some sort of connections as socially awkward as I am (I know it's a weakness of mine I've been trying to work on), or even see if anybody wants to hang out, yet I'll see that they'll end up hanging out with other friends or go on dates at some point or whatever with other people. Shit just makes me tired of putting in the effort and want to give up, as much as it sucks being alone all the time and constantly stirring in my own thoughts questioning what's wrong with me. My last two exes were cheaters (caught one of them in the act), all the friends that I do have are more like acquaintances or people that I used to work with more than they really are friends that go out of their way to ask how I'm doing or offer to hang out, and the friends I did have in high school are off doing their own things in life. At this point besides my family (which I'm grateful that I have), I have literally no one else in my life that I can talk to or hang with or anything without just feeling like a burden to them or like they have to go out of their way to interact with me and not because they genuinely WANT to. It's gone on so long that at this point if someone tells me that they care about me or have feelings for me or whatever its like I don't believe them. I get that it's not the worst situation in the world to be in, and being alone all the time does have its perks, but it can also be a double edged sword and your own personal hell. It ends up feeling a lot worse than it sounds, and you really won't know how it feels until it happens to you.
As a married INFJ it's very interesting to listen to this video. I definitely married my dream girl. I literally had a dream about her and met her a year later. I have definitely dressed over small stuff. I have never been one to make the first move and probably wouldn't have ever gotten married if my best friends hadn't encouraged the relationship. I am very stubborn when I know I am right, but if I am not convinced I try to be flexible. I'm not really sure that I do pick up on fake expressions so much, but my wife is incredibly straightforward. She can lack finesse at times, but I know that she is a very genuine person. Neither my wife nor I do casual very well. We have both gotten much better about meeting people where they are at, but we still don't care for small talk if it isn't an avenue to approach a deeper topic. Dating was very difficult for me, and I could probably count the number of dates I had before I met my wife on one hand. The sensory overload is something I am learning how to deal with. It wasn't a big issue outside of concerts or big gatherings, but now I have three kids. It's definitely been a challenge not getting overwhelmed, but I'm getting there. My wife and I both moved pretty fast. Within three months we independently decided we wanted to marry the other. It still took two years to make it happen and I wonder if we shouldn't have waited a bit longer. Now that I am married I find myself putting much less effort to our romance. I also haven't attended to my family as much as I ought to in exchange for thinking on more philosophical, theological, and scholastic stuff. We have been married for five and a half years and had our issues, bit we are working through them. Thankfully my wife is very patient and we are taking some good stops in the right direction.
I have high moral standards. Kindness and personality outshine appearance to me. My standards with morality are set. It is one of the reasons why I'm a single 31 year old male. I also have a tendency toward #3. I try to maintain humility, so I often see others acts of kindness toward me as just that. Even if I have a good feeling someone may be interested in me, my history of making wrong assumptions before will cause that 0.1% doubt to stop me from initiating anything. Also, as an introvert, I really only get to know women or interact with women in the workplace. The thought of getting it wrong and then having to constantly see that person holds me back. In 2021, a female college expressed her interest in me, and I thought she was being complimentary. Another female colleague told me the other woman wanted to come over to my house. So the .1% doubt was gone and I then pursued her. I hadn't developed an interest in her first. It was my first time where my interest was a reaction to someone's interest in me. I felt like an afterthought within a week and for months when I'd see her at work after it wasn't going to work out I felt undesireable and my confidence took a hit. Now there another colleague who has shown that she would be a great mother and probably a really great partner. She has given me snacks before, but she is great to everyone so she could also just be friendly. I would like to pursue her because she is the only person in a very long time who I think has a pure heart of gold and would be there for me if we were together and would be supportive. The INFJ in me, for the above mentioned reasons, is so careful of not making things awkward that I am sabotaging my opportunity out of fear.
I know how you feel. We just doesn't want t step into the wrong thing but getting tied to it.. or just me. I too have a very high moral standards. My ex used to be toxic even to strangers.. he told me he would break people's window if they drive dangerously.. just.. bunch of chaos.. I left after trying to leave for 5 times. I don't think I would be in a relationship anymore.. because we are so hard to be understand.
I think as an INFJ, just like what the video said we really want to find the connection. I mean, there this feeling that even me can't properly explain it. It's like a cozy, light, genuine, and warm feeling when you meet the right person. And I do found some of them but the problem are my what ifs that's why until now, still in this zone. But being single is not bad at all. Just enjoy the single moments fellow INFJ's and the right one will come or maybe you're the right one for yourself. 💚🧡💚🧡🌻
Dating has always overwhelmed me. As a male INFJ, this has been a particularly huge problem for my entire life due to all the dynamics involved with that.
Even though it can be hard to really look at your personal flaws in this way it is so crucial for growing and becoming a better person and therefore more likely to find love. So helpful 🙏🏽💜
Even tough you have epilepsy?? Like ahhhhhh literally you have to lie to get into a job place. I don't even have fucking good tools to draw,paint etc Only cook and doing menial sports.
I'm an INFP but I relate to most of the items on this list. I imagine that it can be even more difficult for INFJs than it is for INFPs (and it's VERY difficult for INFPs!) because one advantage which INFPs have is that we can be very accommodating and flexible...that is, unless or until the other person crosses The Bridge Too Far and we dig in our heels or even cut the other person cold (which usually takes the other person completely by surprise since he or she never had any idea that we were capable of that).
I am an INFP too and everything you said is so so true! Sometimes I feel like I can be too open, but I guess you can’t find people you truly connect to unless you try to be open…
As INFJ the way I found to improve myself is : "do as if doesn't matter". If you don't care about things, life is easier, less burden in mind (you can still have your values, but you will not care anymore about what will happen if etc... DON'T CARE :) )
i can relate to this so much. i am an infj and i've never been in a relationship. but i do want someone who can understand me and i hope society won't think being an infj is weak.
I'm single 'cause after so much hurt I've been through in life (not just romantically) I've came to set high standards, physically and emotionally, and I'm fine with it, I won't degrade my standards ever, cause what I have to offer is the same that I'd need in someone else, so... Don't ever settle for anything less than what you deserve. There's nothing wrong with having high standards, after all, sharing your love and life with somebody else is something deep and really, really important.
Everything u know about dating goes out the window when u finally meet someone u connect with and everything flows naturally. It’s a numbers game u just need to meet the right persons it takes time
Também penso o mesmo. Estou numa fase da minha vida em que estou esperando Deus enviar para mim as pessoas certas para amizade e um homem certo para um casamento. Principalmente porque minha vida foi marcada por rejeição social e familiar. Estou em processo de cura e só quero iniciar um relacionamento amoroso quando estiver plena comigo mesma.
I know why I'm single and I will tell a few: 1. I'm young still(going to middle school soon). 2. I'm very strict-. 3. I'm introverted-. 4. Nobody sees me like a crush. 5. I always reject people and then I regret it. (Unless it's someone online then it's a straight no) And that's all I can think off, I've been trying my best to change myself up a bit but it's not really working.
Hi! I'm 24 and relate to point 2-5. Trust me one day someone will be able to get past these walls you put up 😉 And you're right, you're young! Enjoy your youth no matter the relationship status
I’m single because all the guys that have asked me out so far aren’t my type and I have no intentions of wasting time on short term relationship I just want my weird , odd , smart crush to ask me out
I am an INFJ, and the primary reason why I am going to stay single is because a relationship would inevitably be a liability to my productivity and success plans. Unless my partner would forgo all the elements of an unproductive lifestyle and assiduously cowork with me, however such people nowadays are very rare, since most people establish relationships solely for entertainment-whether it is watching movies or doing sexual activities, and all other basic activities which the average couple does together. My criteria for a partner is very strict, and some people would assume that I am looking for a person who does not exist. The person whose character corresponds to my criteria exists, but endeavoring to discover such person would be a tremendous waste of time, since such people are very rare.
I'm an INFJ and I can see myself in a few of the reasons that were stated in this video. But in the end of the day, don't rely too much on your personality trait to live your life and just do what you think its best for you, being single isn't bad.
As INFP I can also relate to some highly idealistic/perfectionistic traits. I feel for you INFJs. You are heroes. Realize your worth. Do not let in toxic influence. Iron dome.
Sorry to burst your bubble, the INFJ is usually single because of a few terrible dating/ relationship experiences. The only differences between the INFP and INFJ is the J can be single longer. But they still lower themselves and have horrible experiences. At least INFPs are trying. I think that's more noble in it's own way. It's not easy to take a chance.
As an INFJ i do experience these things but I think I'm not the only one experiencing on letting our walls down and being 'friendly' that is viewed by the other party as flirting or an act of wanting a relationship more than friendship, or should I say that being 'kind' to others gives off an overwhelming vibe to the point that they give a whole new meaning to it and most of those guys I got 'friendly' with developed an obsessive-like behavior that freaks me out everytime, so yeah that's one the reasons for being single.
I can completely relate to some of this but NOT all of this......I would rather be alone than to be with the wrong person. I'm waiting on God's best❤️💙💜
Here are the timestamps 1) You won't settle for anyone other than your dream person. 0:44 2) You stress over small things 1:45 3) You wait for them to make the first move 2:18 4) You can be very stubborn 3:56 4:24 5) You see past the fake acts 4:24 6) You are very casual 4:57 7) Dating is a pain for you 5:29 Have a great day Psych2Goers! With all love.
I've found that I really enjoy being single because relationships require more energy than I'm willing to give. I love the freedom I have and have realized that I usually end up losing myself in relationships and I also have commitment issues. I've been asked for my hand in marriage 6x and have turned them all down. To me it's a prison sentence so I stopped dating because I can't go any further into something more serious.🤷🤷🤷
I think another reason INFJs may still be single is because they're not being true to themselves. A lot of the time, because we are so different from others, we think we need to be more like them to fit in. And so we conform to others' ideas of who we should be, and then we come at dating from that perspective. In reality, you may not be drawn to traits society or others have told you to look for. But it's only when you get really real with yourself that you can be drawn to others for reasons that are authentic to you. Just something I've been thinking about.
Isso é a pura verdade .Eu vivo tentando mudar minha personalidade para deixar as outras pessoas felizes , ele feliz ..Sinto que tenho a necessidade de mudar , porque sou alguem muito diferente , e ninguem gostaria de mim
@@vovokookie I know exactly what you mean. But I have to believe that when you're being authentic, the right person will love you just the way you are. A parte difícil é esperar.
This is a highly neurotic personality type. I was tested as an INFJ but I don't find I act this way anymore. I'm still extremely picky and so I'm content with being single because I won't settle for less than what I want. Oddly enough other people seem more triggered by this than me. I don't let people make me feel bad for my standards so I guess this makes them feel bad about their own. Love who you want but don't say it's what other's need to be happy. I love my friends, I love my dog, and I enjoy meeting new people so I'm content.
I definitely feel the part about people being more triggered than me for my standards! I remember a group of people were trying to force me into being set up with this guy at my school, which I didn’t want because I didn’t know him, he was a mutual of my suitemate and knowing what I want also makes me not want to waste time with people if I’m not sure of their values (I.e. they want something casual) or if they would actually understand me. I’ve also had debates with friends over why I don’t want to date to much but they never understand that as an intuitive person, my interpersonal relationships can be incredibly deep. I have a small group of friends I would do anything for, and similarly I would act that way towards someone I was romantically interested in, but dating a lot of people just ends with a lot of disappointment if they don’t meet my standards or if this end and I’ve already put a lot of energy into this person. INFJ’d already feel A LOT I’m fr just trying to not feel negative emotions more intensely than I already so
This video speaks to me. That’s why I’m still single after 11 years 😂. I just gave up after my last relationship. I just do things as a group. It’s easier for me.
This video completely explains absolutely everything. As a guy people tell me bro you have to get someone or you have to take initiative but I’m just not like that. I’m a very insecure overly analytical perfectionist and now I know it just isn’t only me. Thank you 😊 and I will now download your app.
Every time I took the Myers-Briggs, it told me I was an INFJ. I’m glad that this time the results came back with me being more assertive. In the past I was consistently labeled as an INFJ-T (turbulent) which made me feel awful. I’m happy to have grown so much over the years.
Incredible person who is reading this. Want to let you know that EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE ALRIGHT. Blessings upon blessings come to you daily. Everything you need it’s on its way to you! Be ready to receive! You are healthy. You are strong. You are capable. True wealth is coming for you. You are blessed beyond measure. You are loved so much by many. Receive this TRUTH! Bless you always with everything great you deserve. You are greatness! ~❤️Nat
1.)You won’t settle for anyone other than your dream person-0:44- Pretty much, yes 2.)You stress over small things-1:46- No 3.)You wait for others to make the first move-2:18- well...kinda 4.)You can be very stubborn-3:56- No 5.)You see past fake acts-4:24- Yes 6.)You don’t do casual-4:57- Not quite. I usually auto-friendzone-ed myself 7.) Dating is a pain for you- Oh well....it's kinda power draining for me tho....
I am an INFJ but also on the autism spectrum. At 41, I have rarely met a woman who said "yes" to a date and still waiting on my first girlfriend. I like someone now but as much as my coworkers would like to see us together, she just wants to remain friends. She says she is aromantic. I can respect her wishes. Maybe someday another woman will come along and maybe not. I just say "It is what it is" and try to think of other things when possible.
I have taken the test many times throughout my lifetime and I always end up with INFJ. Unlike most here, I have been married twice and going through my second divorce. I feel like my picker is broken. I seem to attract narcissistic personalities. Even with everything I have been through, I still want a partner who understands me. My need for affection and my need for alone time. It’s such a push/pull in my relationships. Staying single would have saved me a great deal of heartache.
I didn't know I was the rarest personality type... Introverted, Intuitive, Feeling, and Judging. I've always hated crowds, I'm an artist, so I like to look deeper into the details, expressions, body language, etc. I have developed huge social anxiety because of my over sensitive feeling, I take insults harshly because I overthink everything people say to me, and I take compliments extra nicely for the same reasons. Judgemental, I always make sure I know my opinion on everything and everyone. The truth is, everyone does this, just usually they do it subconsciously. Another reason I've developed a huge social anxiety is this, I'm afraid of people judging me like I judge them, this may seem hypocritical, but I understand that I can't do anything about it and learned to accept it. Though, it still scars me though, I can't even go out with close friends and not think about every word I say 5 times in advance, I barely talk just because I deem most things I want to say unnecessary or inappropriate. I fit this personality type like a glove, I guess that's why I feel so separate from all the other people my age, because I am.
Well i don't think i have social anxiety but the judgemental part, i am. But the difference is, im not scared of people judging me or categorising me in some sorr of way. To me i don't call it judging people but trying to understand them by analysing them. I can good as well as bad or things that i dislike, i always try to figure out what makes them unique as a person, what makes them extraordinary, i try to search for good amazing things in them. And you know the best part? The more i see them grow and learn about them, the more i realise that some of my past observations were totally wrong, and they are all good at heart. The just have flaws, but if you know how to communicate with them, it'll all be smooth. Now about the talking. Yes and a lot of times but not always, i tend to overthink. Like i would say something then i would start worry if it was good or wrong. But then i calm down, take a deep breathe, cleae my thoughts and my brain always hits me with the... they are your beloved friends, if you ever said anything bad, you know you can apologise for it. Tell them the reason and why you thought of saying it to make them understand your thinking. And most importantly, they are YOUR friends, they always got your back, like you have theirs. They will definitely understand you. Even if they don't. We are like brothers and sisters, and If not God, i would I've never met them, because they are just amzing. They are my churchmates my friends my brothers and sisters in God, and for all of us we testify that we were saved by our Lord Jesus Christ. And im just saying that, without God, i would be there,where you are but he has pushed me through it. Im not advertising about God, im not asking you to change, and also im not mentioning anything about Jesus's love for you or anything. Am simply giving credit to my God, who has pushed me this far. Before i met my friends, i was stuck. Always so anxious. But i have improved in the name of Jesus and i am happy for myself. Because what YOU are going through, Hard is not even enough to describe it... but i pray for you my friend and whether you are a Christian or not, may God work wonders as he did me.😁
We are just the same. Don't be afraid. I don't even feel to be close to the people around my age. What the do is just unrelatable for me. I don't have any friends now, and that's okay.
Sadly, in my last relationship I did my best to stop doing most of the things that are described here... Perhaps I tried too hard? After we broke up I realized that we were never a good match and the main reason we stayed together was because I avoided disagreeing with as hard as I could and pretended to not notice her little lies. I tried to be the person she wanted me to be because I thought it was the only way someone could love me. I felt relieved after we broke up
@@NganHoang-dy8el I find it possible because we are naturally biased. Because we are naturally biased, it is easy for us to mistype ourselves as something else. I used to call myself an INFJ because I want to be seen as "rare". But as I start to familiarize myself with the MBTI world, I realized that I am an INTP, not INFJ.
Omg....this....this litterally helped me so much in understanding what is going on. I was litterally so lost to why everyone can get into a relationship so fast and be so non-shalont about it ect. I can't tell you the sense of relief that has started to come off my shoulders while watching you videos. It's helping me so much in being able to put a name to what I'm feeling.this entire video hit every point and issue I have to a T and makes so much sense. Thank you for what your doing. As someone who struggles with mental health and doesn't have resources to professional help, it's so nice to be able to work thru some things and see others go thru same scenarios. Please keep up the amazing work, your are helping so many 💞 thank you!
I watched your past video and determined then I am definitely an INFJ . I am single and want to have a healthy relationship, but always find myself hesitant to ever ask anyone who may be interested out. Part is fear from past negative experiences in relationships, but actually I don't think I've ever asked anyone out! I am seriously considering checking out the dating site because I truly love your videos and trust the information given. Thank you for always being there with another much needed insightful video!
As ENFP i can't actually see problems but certain attraction for those traits, may be a problem in a way or another i can fully understand it why and instead of arguing i wouldn't mind to help and deal with those issues.
Na verdade, é justamente esse o interesse que desejamos encontrar num parceiro. Posso estar enganada, mas ainda acho que o amor da minha vida será um homem ENFP maduro e cheio da presença de Deus.😀🙌
Being single is fun for me! 😆 I can’t imagine having to give my attention and energy to another person yet. I think love will find me when I’m ready to give and receive love unconditionally.
An INFJ here :P since my birthday is on valentine's Day it's fascinating to see everyone with their SO outside, while I'm celebrating my birthday with my family near them haha
friendly reminder that there's a possibility that you're mistyped if you only took the tests, especially 16 personalities lol if you really wanna know your type learn cognitive functions ! super interesting
I'm an INFJ-T!!! Soooo.... I feel the same way about all of these. However, I want to change and become better! I don't want to wait for anyone or others. I'm starting to slowly change. I started making conversations instead of being on the receiving end sometimes. It's tough, but I cant continue to hide myself anymore. It is what it is. (Slowly though... I'm not about to be an extrovert. Lol)
I related to quite a bit of this. I’m 23 f never had a bf and sometimes I want a relationship, but then I think how bothersome and almost impossible it’s be to find someone I like, in which the feeling is mutual, and then just change my mind. There are so many things that should match up before getting into a relationship- physical attraction , emotional intelligence, chemistry between personalities and individual habits and so forth. I have met many people who I connected with emotionally, but the physical aspect has always been a struggle for me. Despite all this, I do want a relationship someday. But for now, I can say that I’m almost 100% with continuing to stay by myself and pursue my hobbies and career/life aspirations.
I’m not entirely sure how relatable this is to the INFJ personality type, but sometimes I doubt if I could ever get married as I enjoy alone time far too much. Is anyone else the same as an INFJ?
Another reason why you’re still single is because you recently went through a bad breakup and you’re not ready to date again It didn’t happen to me but that could be one of the reasons 🤷♀️
To be completely honest, I wouldn’t mind being in a relationship, but I just do not have the patience or personality for it. Not to mention that I am especially not romantic.
I refuse to settle for less I don't care about his money looks 🤔 well looks is just a bonus But overall I just want a healthy relationship and longevity
@@aduhaduh4426, no one said to chase, but you should show specific interest, not just give a signs, people aren't mind readers. And we don't live in the 50s, dating isn't the same. Some can be shy and maybe hurt by the last relationships. So like i said, if you will see some potential in someone, don't be afraid to show it, otherwise you can miss your chance.
I got INFJ the first time I took the personality test (I later got INTJ though). So far with dating, my Aspergers fixating has gotten in the way to the point where people compared me to a Yandere, said I have a strong personality, or tell me that I am too obsessive. In reality, I just can't help but see my love interest as a special interest and want to work really hard for my happy ending in life. I also have a friends to lovers stratgey going on in my head that unfortunately rarely happens to me IRL.
I'm an infj also I can't make the first move for fear of overburdening them or for fear of being ignored even when I'm socializing with people I feel relatively uncomfortable so I like to be on my own (in my comfort zone) so I guess these are compelling reasons why I've never been in a relationship before...
I was raised by narcissists. I keep working on myself, unraveling their bs and I recently discovered the trick is to listen to people’s wants and dreams because it’s highly likely that nobody else is hearing them on that. I’ve recently made friends this way. Just by hearing them more.
Damn dude, this video really hits the feels man.....EVERY signs listed in this video describes me, not even going to lie. I didn't even know what an INFJ was until now, but I guess I was one all along. ESPECIALLY the one about waiting for the other to make the first move. I've always wanted to make the first move, but always end up failing or backing out. I have more to add, but as of right now, that's all I could think of. If I have anymore to add, i'll come back and make an edit, but yeah, this hits the feels
Yes, totally me... All those points are speaking about me, and although I would like to soften some... I prefer to be single then in a relationship that it's not worth it. With that being said, thank you for the video, I really love it, and thank you for helping us understand ourselves better as well as others.😉
I am an introvert, I do feel like a burden on people, I am very cautious about people in general and I can tell a person's mood or personality based on their attitude or tone towards me.... I am unsure if people really do enjoy me or want to connect with me because I don't want to be left behind
Who's an INFJ here? Which indicator are you? Also, Shoutout to Sosyncd for sponsoring today's video so meet compatible personality matches today app.sosyncd.com/BdNN/4Psych2Go
I’m single because my life is in a really wiggly road and I wouldn’t want to put pressure on them
I'm single because I don't want people to suffer because of my presence
Because I'm insecure
How does is say you wrote this 2 weeks ago to his was posted like 2 mins ago
@@chynabarbieeeeee
I bet you look outstanding/beautiful/handsome, even if you don’t think so
I know you are :]
It's funny how in my friend group I'm one of the only ones that's never been in a relationship but I still give out the best love advice
Same here
Relatable
Because our standards may be higher than their standards, so we observe more.
@@yesha3306 racist advice what lmao?
@@captainrex5947 oh you didn't know about her racism in her inside edition comments?
As an INFJ all of these are very true haha. Another problem I think we have ( or at least for me) is that we friend zone ourselves pretty quickly or we think, “It would be easier if we’re just friends.” because INFJs just know how to naturally be a good friend, so we would rather stick to what’s comfortable rather then try and develop something new with someone. Again that could just be me 😂 We may be single, yet we still give the best advice when it comes to dating..make it make sense lmao
Edit: Jeez a lot of my fellow INFJs liked this comment 😂 Don’t worry guys, we’ll get through this together haha. Single or not we have something better..the power of friendship haha
Edit #2: Just so you guys know I am reading the comments on this. You guys are awesome and deserve everything in life 💙
Wow you are so right I feel the exact same
Guiding others to a treasure, you cannot possess 😂👍 btw hey fellow INFJ
Platonic 4-Ever is my slogan.
Agreed
Big money facts right here brother👊🏼
1.)You won’t settle for anyone other than your dream person-0:44
2.)You stress over small things-1:46
3.)You wait for others to make the first move-2:18
SoSyncd(sponsorship)-2:48
4.)You can be very stubborn-3:56
5.)You see past fake acts-4:24
6.)You don’t do casual-4:57
7.) Dating is a pain for you-5:30
ty time traveler
Wait how did you write it 21 hours ago-
Thanks
Ah damn I strike all these off. Well at least it's confirmed that I'll die alone with nobody to love
Might as well make myself die sooner
@@jakatak5764 Ay, same.
I know that as an INFJ, I hold myself and others to SUCH insanely high standards, that nobody could possibly live up to my fantasies of an ideal partner.
Omg same! Then I will try to lower my standards and think in realistic terms and be so irritated😖 because I'm still on the look out for this "special person" being a hopeless romantic doesn't help me either. But I'm trying to be better at this by writing out realistic qualities and trying not to have expectations.
Ask yourself this: why this dream person of yours should choose you? Even if you have same things what you want from him. Manifesting what you want from a partner also doesn't mean that you will get that person but at least this way you already have what you wanted. So compromises are important, and with time and effort by growing together you can develop missing things. Plus, what do you mean by hopeless romantic? Do you expect to get in mainly from some else or you also would like to make romantic acts, reciprocate equally? By the way, I'm INFP.
Now what?🐗🦓🦄🦊
That would be me. 100% me.
As fellow INFJ who is happily married gonna give some realistic feedback to this. We do the fall for idea of person and have unrealistic standards. Inferior SE does that, have to be realistic about our standards tbh
I honestly don't understand why people sees being single bad, and why they always judge those who enjoys being single.
Ikr
I think it depends on the people you know... Maybe even your culture... Here in latinamerica most people I know would not jokingly wish you good luck for even try to have a more formal and serius relationship that involves actual feelings instead of just being in one just for the sake of having sex...
The later example is normally seen as "living the life" or something "normal" than any person (mostly men) would want for the rest of their lifes, never having the need to actually be in a real relationship... Personally I don't understand how can you ever think that way but anyways, everyone has their own tastes, just as there are people that want to throw up after seeing a couple demostrate affection for each other there are other people (like me) that lives daydreaming with romance and love dovey stuff even when not having a crush.
Love being single thoroughly, if we’re being honest
Those who enjoy being single have already had relationships before. I've never had one. I wouldn't say I enjoy being single, but I enjoy life and enjoy being good and spreading kindness to others and seeing if those seeds will spread to others and they will spread kindness to others as a result. Luckily I currently am at a place in life where I teach really young children, so they have boundless love and it is easy to influence them to spread kindness to others. I take this opportunity to prepare me for my fatherhood someday if I can ever actually get the courage to make the first move on someone I like.
Ben single can be better if your attached you can't do anything lol
6. “you don’t do casual”
as an INFJ, I relate to this one a lot, as I do tend to more prefer committing to things that I find having a purpose in, spending time and effort into something “casual” or something without a clear purpose just sounds wasteful and draining.
still single 💀💀, but least there’s friends :)
i might delete this later
update: I am NO LONGER SINGLE
Nah don't I relate to this alot, "why would I waste time on something your not sure about" yeah that's true along the lines being indulge with the stuff you find massively interesting is already love has well thank you.
Wow, do you want to tell me how? Im a INFJ too
Congrats
yay!!
Wooo!
I’m an INFJ too... 26-years-old and never dated before. I saw myself in this video except for the part of being afraid to take the first step because while growing up I always expressed my feelings to the boys I liked. Turns out that I was either friendzoned or laughed at and maybe that’s why I became more reserved and afraid. There’s nothing wrong with being single but sometimes I feel lonely and cry a lot wondering what’s wrong with me to not be able to get someone’s attention... Maybe that will change someday, let’s hope. I want to believe that I deserve love too. Sorry for this, I needed to get it out of my chest 😅 Maybe someone reading this had the same experience.
Thank you for your videos, they truly help a lot in making us understand us better, both physically and mentally ❤️
P.S: to all of you in the comments experiencing the same feelings, remember that you're unique, awesome and beautiful and life will find a way to reward you with the love you dream so much about! Love you!
off course they will friend zone or laughing at you, men don't like to be chased. let them come to you 1st. This video doesn't do justice for female INFJ. I think it applies more to male INFJ.
As a male, albeit an INFJ, I would not mind my partner being the first to act. It feels nice to know that they want it enough to say something when you are too scared to
@@fireeye33 ENFP, have to disagree. I love women to be interesting, active and approachable, very attractive trait. This needs to be followed by them being stimulating to talk to, but that is usually no problem with INFJs.
@@Elgard2 you're talking about women reciprocate by appropriately corresponding to you. I'm talking about a woman CHASING. Actually men who likes to be chased are a simp beta male.
I’ve had that same experience, I sometimes feel I’m incompetent and not good enough to deserve a relationship, so I try ignoring that possibility whenever an opportunity strikes, despite hoping for someone to make a move... It does hurt, alot.. So I hope you receive all the love and attention that you deserve, and don’t think you don’t deserve it, you do, give yourself a break.
Remember that knowing your personality type is a way that you can use to know yourself and improve. Don't use your personality type like a excuse to not grow, mainly because it's really easy to misunderstand the INFJ cause of the rarity stuff.
You are incredible and amazing just the way you are, and if you think that you can be a INFJ or relate to any point of this video, don't take it for granted! Do what's better for you, and be patient with your own process.
Stay safe everyone! 🌿
That's really true dude.
Stay safe 😊
Am honestly disappointed. Myers Briggs are popular but as always, popular =/ quality. The people who invented the *theory* weren't qualified. Please don't label yourself like that. People are too complex. And if you're nothing like an INFJ, and just share traits because trauma hinders your true self, you can suffer even more by using it as an excuse.
This video screams sellout to me.
@@ensco7 True, I guess the MBTI theory can really be beneficial if you use it like a way to know yourself more, instead of labelling, and all of this stuff about rare = special can really make people push themselves too much to identify like a INFJ, when actually people with this personality type tend to struggle with a lot of things and are very misunderstood. I guess this make all the personality types seems like closed boxes, when actually you can be a INFJ but have a lot of characteristics of a INFP, ENFJ or a ISFJ, because as you said people are complex and trying to force yourself to one pattern can be really destructive.
Thank you. 💗
I sincerely wish you the best as well (genuine, intelligent-empath; that ISN'T a Cluster-B/narcissit/NPD in disguise)! 😊 ~seriously, thank you.
PS: the world needs to rid itself of cluster-b permanently - along with the narcissitic-codependants/evil enablers (who tend to be genuinely, unintelligent-codependant that have small 'frontal-lobe').
@@ianmatheus7178 The Myers Briggs is actually accurate! Seriously! Please don't listen to that other guy! Smh.
He's likely one of the 'undesirable-personality' type (ESFJ/ESTJ; very manipulative, little moral compass, they make the worst narcissits irl, FYI) or someone with narcissitic personality disorder!
Any intelligent person who attempts to analyse people's personality and relationship preference know the Myer Brigg is accurate! 😀 It gives people a strong idea into how certain personality types mind behave and their preference - which is invaluable!
Evil personality types prey and study people's personalities. The Myer Brigg exposes these evil, manipulative types, i.e. ESFJ/ESTJ; even without narcissitic personality disorder, they love to observe, study, PREY/VIOLATE people's minds! This is why they love being "popular", it feeds their ego and gives them potential 'pawns'; that they can weaponise against others!
It's really nice to see this video. As a 21 year old who has never been in a relationship or even had my first kiss, it's really good to have a psychological reason for this. Just one minute in and I all ready feel less abnormal. Thank you so much for everything you guys do
No worries brother, you have plenty of time, you haven't even started. Believe me, it will get easier and better, just work on yourself.
@@Kunigunda897 Thank you, my friend! Yeah, I've always struggled with my mental health and subsequently my self esteem, but I'm beginning to work on being more open towards people now. It's tough, but I'm getting there
@@davidbrussard-composer7372, I'm glad to hear that, I'm also working with that, but your finical life is also important, so it's better to put your main focus towards that instead of dating. I'm 26 and it's getting easier, i started to get more attention than never before, although still I'm holding myself for what I expect so i don't let myself to be blinded by it if I'm mot interested in that person (girl), so I don't rush either but it's ready a sign that i have more chances to meet someone who would be good for me. And older men in their 30s says that they have more possibilities, options. And don't forget to put an efort towards your looks either, as the say looks attracts personality captivates.
@@Kunigunda897 man you Super Chad.
I am unemployed now 21 years oo
@@Kunigunda897 I good at Jack shit soooo
Ahh :))))
INFJ here. I no longer look for nor expect love from external world or others. To me love is not about giving and receiving. Love is a state of being. One can experience continuous love by becoming love. It is our natural state of being.
Sim. Acredito que esse conceito está ligado ao amor próprio. De fato, antes de querer que alguém nos ame, devemos primeiro amar a nós mesmos.
I’m infj, turning 50 this year. I’ve never dated, mostly because my parents kept my under their full control at home till I was 31, and once I managed to get get out they still emotionally controlled me for another nearly another 8 years. I then got completely away but have no clue how to interact with others. I had finally decided to try hard to contact with others and the pandemic hit and I backslid into being a hermit. I’m going to have to be content with my pets, books and hobbies at this point. Humans are complicated.
I see that as a good plan. But don't worry, i pray fo you. And something unexpected will come your way. I believe that in the name of God. So may Jesus Christ bless you and your home. Whether you are religious or not, i still hope you find God you will see.. but bless you and your pets, i want pets too!!!😆😆
wwwhhhaattt how did they have this much control over u
Owen, are you homosexual or heterosexual?
I am 25 and I feel the same way. Wishing you well to be truly and completely free (like I wish for myself/ fellow INFJ) and to live your best life. I find that being "free" is what we crave the most, but we never get. (Edit: And also to find a love that will nourish your soul
50 what the fuck
What is the point then.
You have money right,Owen Creed?
You must have had 5 or 20 girls fucked in your life it's imposibile not to
INFJ guy here who has done a lot of dating. For me, what makes it tough is that I don't feel understood by others - I feel like they're desperately trying to understand me, but don't really "get" it. Went through the same with last girlfriend. What makes it worse is that it's normal for me to hear that I "get" others when we can get into deeper conversation, which I crave. Can definitely be a lonesome process, but hey, I'm incurably optimistic so I just keep trying
Omg I feel this soo hard, it really can be lonely.. longing to be fully understood or atleast more understood on a deaper level.
Good luck with finding someone!^-^ maybe the app can help u out:) I think its a really neat idea n opportunity
Have you tried coach Corey Wayne’s stuff 3% man
For me as infj male, it’s the starting conversation part
@NPR- Man up dude. You are not your sisters, regardless of mom's bias.
I can relate with this.
Can you give us some tips that you learned so far, that does work from your experience.
I'm dating a girl and doesn't want to lose her😭
I can actually relate to this so much. This video is like it was made for me. The reason why I'm single is because I'm insecure and I don't really settle for less. Thanks for this !
Didn't you fake depression, and made fun of black people, and Indians and Mexicans💀 Alyssa just stop.
I would can't settle on my past trauma haven't had the best experiences with girls yet in a relationship. So I am really insecure also. Thanks for the video as always
@@yesha3306 wait what
@@businessisboomin7252 My new video is out I have more videos❤ exposing her and making fun of male victims🥰.
@@yesha3306 wow thank you I'm I will subscribe.
For me it's also about motivation.
I don't really feel motivated to go out there and date anyone "just because", I only feel motivated to ask someone out when I feel that there's a real connection.
Over the years I've adjusted, and lowered the "standards" for what I think of as a "Real Connection", but I still come across it very rarely.
I turn 32 this year, and I've felt that real connection maybe 5 times in my life, and none of those people were romantically compatible for various reasons.
And when I'm not feeling the connection, I don't really mind being single - it's all I've ever known - and there are some massive benefits to being single.
Those are my 2 cents as an INFJ.
I'm also an INFJ and this is exactly my experience too. It's not that I want someone who's "perfect". I think it's a bit silly to tell people their standards are "too high", because, well... What's the alternative? Be like, "OK, I don't care for this person so much, but I'm going to make them my life partner?" I'd rather be single.
And yes, I do very rarely find people that I can really want very badly. But so far I've never been lucky enough that they wanted me too. As you said, it happens very rarely, maybe once every 5 years for me. Also, it makes it extremely painful because it means rejection by these people is very hard to bear. Other people will be like : "oh there are plenty of other guys!" but... NOT FOR ME, there aren't. I crave a special type of connection and it's just very hard to find it.
I've almost never been in relationships but I was once in a relationship with someone who I thought was great. I was actually the one who went after him (which I rarely do, but since I fall in love so rarely, I can't really afford to lose opportunities so sometimes I will eventually go for it). It's not that I found "flaws", or that he was "not perfect" enough. There was nothing WRONG with him. But... I just wasn't in love with that person. I tried, but I couldn't force myself to care. It was horrible for both me and him. I felt guilty, and he felt unloved, and that wasn't fair to him. I'd MUCH rather be single than be back in a relationship like that one.
@@aramis5301
" What's the alternative? Be like, "OK, I don't care for this person so much, but I'm going to make them my life partner?" I'd rather be single."
Exactly! I've had people say or imply "just go out there and Date! It doesn't matter who it is, you'll get better at dating because of the experiences and eventually you'll probably find someone".
The problem for me is that i'm a "Quality over Quantity"-person (as I've understood is a common trait for INFJs)
And so I literally don't see any point in dating people I'm not actually interested in. Plus I'd feel terrible if I dated someone, tried to "get" feelings for them, and then it not working.
It sucks that you had that experience, but I'd like to ask - if you're comfortable answering - do you think it was helpful in the end? Like, did you get a deeper understanding of yourself, or how you like to date? Was there a silver lining, or was it just all around terrible?
I also recognize the "Plenty of other guys" argument. I'm a guy interested in women, so the version I usually hear is more simlar to "I don't see you that way, but you're an amazing guy, and whoever ends up dating you is gonna be really lucky, there's bound to be someone".
And yea, getting the rejection from the _One_ person you're interested in sucks, but at this point I'd probably be more nervous if they said "yes" to a date because it would feel like there's so much at stake.😅
I'd be super happy if it was more common/accepted that women did the asking out. I imagine having to reject someone also sucks, but I think there's definitely an imbalance here when it comes to what situation we experience in the "male" and "female" roles.
@@JokerCrowe Well, having to reject people can also be really awful, especially when so many guys are just not willing to hear the word "no" (and have been encouraged to disregard a woman's refusal or even take it as encouragement). I honestly couldn't tell which one I hate the most between getting rejected and having to reject someone (which can sometimes turn into "getting rid of a stalker"). But personally, I'll eventually confront someone who's not being clear with me or ask them out, if I see it's not going anywhere and nothing will happen if I do nothing. When I was younger, I used to do what Frank describes and just pine after someone for years from afar, and now I know that's just silly so I try not to do it anymore.
As to whether that one relationship had any positive aspects... I guess I'd have to say yes. I haven't had any other relationship so I suppose I can say that at least, I've had one (that's stupid and not really a "good thing" but at least I feel less like a freak). And I've discovered that I couldn't date someone who has self-esteem issues and who tends to "idolize" me. Some people might love this, but for me, it's just super cringe. And I'm terrible at acting like a crutch for another person's self-esteem, it's just not something I can do well. Also, I realised in that case that I was intimidating to certain guys because the reason he didn't ask me out was that he was convinced I was out of his league (which really surprised me when he told me that).
At it boy, you spit some real facts though 💯
I felt so bare. Your like reading an open book of me, seriously? Everything is so accurate, I'm gonna cry in the corner now
I'm single because I don't find that one person who's ready to give me as much as I give them. I'm sick of always being the one compromising while they nitpick on trivial things. I'd want someone as understanding & caring as I'm.
Sim. Sou mulher INFJ e também digo o mesmo.
Coincidentally, did the personality test like last week and apparently I'm an INFJ. Read about it and much of the stuff made sense. So interesting. Think I'll observe myself a bit more. 😊🤓
I can bet we both single😁
Hi fellow INFJ ✌🏻
I took the personality test few months back and I'm too an INFJ and it's pretty good cause I love my deep imagination
UA-cam sure was fucking fast
Ohhh you mean you Psych2Go.
I get it no swear words
Number 3 is very relatable to me, and I've found that I keep waiting for others to make a move, and when I've tried to make a move, it often come across as the way I wanted to be.
I really like how you mentioned how us INFJ’s are looking for someone that connects with us mentally and also spiritually. It was the first reason you listed. It’s something I’m looking for in a girlfriend and potential wife.
Sou mulher INFJ e este também é o desejo do meu coração. É muito bom saber que não sou a única no mundo a pensar assim.
Yeah-... I'm INFJ, I've been thinking for years "why can't I find anyone", or "am I not good enough?". But when I finally opened my eyes, I realized that I wasn't the problem, it was the people around me, I couldn't see myself with someone I knew, coming to the conclusion that I didn't have "romantic attraction", this made me realize that I was already happy and well even without someone.Knowing that I wasn't strange or different because I didn't find someone did me a lot of good...
Heyyy, I'm infj and I want to tell everyone that I found the love of my life and so will you!!!
The funny thing is, my long-term boyfriend is entp, almost the complete opposite. Even though I don't think opposites and differences always attract each other, his personality made me stronger as I was very weak and exhausted from all the thinking and worrying about everything and everyone. He made me start taking care of myself, not just others. So maybe try something like that if you haven't already ! 😘
fun fact is that INFJ's are most compatible with ENFP's and ENTP's
And hey congrats hope you live long and happy with him😘😘
@@aayanalimfatima589 thank youuu, we almost broke up recently but it made us stronger, I hope everything works out in the end
reading the comments of other INFJs made me feel tremendously at ease, knowing that i'm perfectly normal like anybody else is truly relaxing
Normal, at 1% of the population? Hardly
As a deeply introspective INFJ, I have a lot to say. I won’t settle for less, but that does not mean what I am looking for is unrealistic either. I couldn’t live with myself if I’m with someone and all I’m thinking is “I lowered my standards for you.” I don’t particularly stress over small things, but they are a factor because a lot of couples overlook things and then they end up arguing about them years later, sometimes even after they’re married. So of course I will admit I don’t do casual in the sense that I want to connect with you and see if we have similar things in mind instead of pretending everything’s all good and then figuring out we don’t really know each other. By the way, why is seeing past fake acts a bad thing? Imagine if we all had that ability. If you have to put on a fake act to begin with, I would feel kind of offended that you would think I wouldn’t see through it. Overall, we do need more honesty in this world. Less time would be wasted and less people would get their hopes crushed after having them up for so long because there wasn’t enough discussion. Relationship or no relationship, I will always have my books and animals. I’m good 😎
Exactly! I am an INFJ too and totally agree with you. The idea of lowering standards to find someone is something that makes absolutely no sense to me. It's not about judging people's "worth", anyway. It's about whether they are compatible with me. I do crave that special connection with someone and suffer from not having it, but I am also very much able to live without a partner. I've been single almost my entire life. I don't NEED a partner so badly that I would compromise my integrity and well-being to be with them.
Don’t lower your standards its not worthy it. This maybe cruel but a lot of relationships are very superficial now days. Seeing pass the fakeness is a good thing cause ignoring it may make the relationship last longer but you’ll be a sucker.
I LOVE ITTTT!!!!
Yeah this is it
Can we just appreciate the fact that they upload everyday and sometimes twice a day? Love your channel!! Keep going❤❤❤
Damn...this hit different. 21 years old, single, and doesn't know what's next in life
Dont worry!! You are not alone.. Just enjoy the moment..
@@user-io8sg7ji9v 🥺❤️
Nooo, why does everything in this video gotta hit the nail on the head? I feel so called out... 😭
I'm still single cuz nobody bothers to go out of their way to show any interest in me let alone see how I'm doing or anything, no matter how many times I try to go out of my way to strike up first conversations or show interest and establish some sort of connections as socially awkward as I am (I know it's a weakness of mine I've been trying to work on), or even see if anybody wants to hang out, yet I'll see that they'll end up hanging out with other friends or go on dates at some point or whatever with other people. Shit just makes me tired of putting in the effort and want to give up, as much as it sucks being alone all the time and constantly stirring in my own thoughts questioning what's wrong with me.
My last two exes were cheaters (caught one of them in the act), all the friends that I do have are more like acquaintances or people that I used to work with more than they really are friends that go out of their way to ask how I'm doing or offer to hang out, and the friends I did have in high school are off doing their own things in life. At this point besides my family (which I'm grateful that I have), I have literally no one else in my life that I can talk to or hang with or anything without just feeling like a burden to them or like they have to go out of their way to interact with me and not because they genuinely WANT to. It's gone on so long that at this point if someone tells me that they care about me or have feelings for me or whatever its like I don't believe them.
I get that it's not the worst situation in the world to be in, and being alone all the time does have its perks, but it can also be a double edged sword and your own personal hell. It ends up feeling a lot worse than it sounds, and you really won't know how it feels until it happens to you.
As a married INFJ it's very interesting to listen to this video.
I definitely married my dream girl. I literally had a dream about her and met her a year later.
I have definitely dressed over small stuff.
I have never been one to make the first move and probably wouldn't have ever gotten married if my best friends hadn't encouraged the relationship.
I am very stubborn when I know I am right, but if I am not convinced I try to be flexible.
I'm not really sure that I do pick up on fake expressions so much, but my wife is incredibly straightforward. She can lack finesse at times, but I know that she is a very genuine person.
Neither my wife nor I do casual very well. We have both gotten much better about meeting people where they are at, but we still don't care for small talk if it isn't an avenue to approach a deeper topic.
Dating was very difficult for me, and I could probably count the number of dates I had before I met my wife on one hand.
The sensory overload is something I am learning how to deal with. It wasn't a big issue outside of concerts or big gatherings, but now I have three kids. It's definitely been a challenge not getting overwhelmed, but I'm getting there.
My wife and I both moved pretty fast. Within three months we independently decided we wanted to marry the other. It still took two years to make it happen and I wonder if we shouldn't have waited a bit longer.
Now that I am married I find myself putting much less effort to our romance. I also haven't attended to my family as much as I ought to in exchange for thinking on more philosophical, theological, and scholastic stuff. We have been married for five and a half years and had our issues, bit we are working through them. Thankfully my wife is very patient and we are taking some good stops in the right direction.
I have high moral standards. Kindness and personality outshine appearance to me. My standards with morality are set. It is one of the reasons why I'm a single 31 year old male. I also have a tendency toward #3. I try to maintain humility, so I often see others acts of kindness toward me as just that. Even if I have a good feeling someone may be interested in me, my history of making wrong assumptions before will cause that 0.1% doubt to stop me from initiating anything. Also, as an introvert, I really only get to know women or interact with women in the workplace. The thought of getting it wrong and then having to constantly see that person holds me back. In 2021, a female college expressed her interest in me, and I thought she was being complimentary. Another female colleague told me the other woman wanted to come over to my house. So the .1% doubt was gone and I then pursued her. I hadn't developed an interest in her first. It was my first time where my interest was a reaction to someone's interest in me. I felt like an afterthought within a week and for months when I'd see her at work after it wasn't going to work out I felt undesireable and my confidence took a hit. Now there another colleague who has shown that she would be a great mother and probably a really great partner. She has given me snacks before, but she is great to everyone so she could also just be friendly. I would like to pursue her because she is the only person in a very long time who I think has a pure heart of gold and would be there for me if we were together and would be supportive. The INFJ in me, for the above mentioned reasons, is so careful of not making things awkward that I am sabotaging my opportunity out of fear.
I know how you feel. We just doesn't want t step into the wrong thing but getting tied to it.. or just me.
I too have a very high moral standards. My ex used to be toxic even to strangers.. he told me he would break people's window if they drive dangerously.. just.. bunch of chaos.. I left after trying to leave for 5 times.
I don't think I would be in a relationship anymore.. because we are so hard to be understand.
I think as an INFJ, just like what the video said we really want to find the connection. I mean, there this feeling that even me can't properly explain it. It's like a cozy, light, genuine, and warm feeling when you meet the right person. And I do found some of them but the problem are my what ifs that's why until now, still in this zone. But being single is not bad at all. Just enjoy the single moments fellow INFJ's and the right one will come or maybe you're the right one for yourself. 💚🧡💚🧡🌻
You are said brilliant
Dating has always overwhelmed me. As a male INFJ, this has been a particularly huge problem for my entire life due to all the dynamics involved with that.
Even though it can be hard to really look at your personal flaws in this way it is so crucial for growing and becoming a better person and therefore more likely to find love. So helpful 🙏🏽💜
Even tough you have epilepsy??
Like ahhhhhh literally you have to lie to get into a job place.
I don't even have fucking good tools to draw,paint etc
Only cook and doing menial sports.
@Khalilah D. Jeez, give it a rest! So smarmy.
I'm an INFP but I relate to most of the items on this list. I imagine that it can be even more difficult for INFJs than it is for INFPs (and it's VERY difficult for INFPs!) because one advantage which INFPs have is that we can be very accommodating and flexible...that is, unless or until the other person crosses The Bridge Too Far and we dig in our heels or even cut the other person cold (which usually takes the other person completely by surprise since he or she never had any idea that we were capable of that).
I am an INFP too and everything you said is so so true! Sometimes I feel like I can be too open, but I guess you can’t find people you truly connect to unless you try to be open…
I'm an INTJ, and I relate to this video a lot too.
As INFJ the way I found to improve myself is : "do as if doesn't matter". If you don't care about things, life is easier, less burden in mind (you can still have your values, but you will not care anymore about what will happen if etc... DON'T CARE :) )
I feel the same exact way. I don’t know if that’s an INFJ thing or we’re just broken people. 😅
i can relate to this so much. i am an infj and i've never been in a relationship. but i do want someone who can understand me and i hope society won't think being an infj is weak.
Screw what society thinks. Get yours!
I'm single 'cause after so much hurt I've been through in life (not just romantically) I've came to set high standards, physically and emotionally, and I'm fine with it, I won't degrade my standards ever, cause what I have to offer is the same that I'd need in someone else, so... Don't ever settle for anything less than what you deserve. There's nothing wrong with having high standards, after all, sharing your love and life with somebody else is something deep and really, really important.
Concordo plenamente com você.
Everything u know about dating goes out the window when u finally meet someone u connect with and everything flows naturally. It’s a numbers game u just need to meet the right persons it takes time
Também penso o mesmo. Estou numa fase da minha vida em que estou esperando Deus enviar para mim as pessoas certas para amizade e um homem certo para um casamento.
Principalmente porque minha vida foi marcada por rejeição social e familiar. Estou em processo de cura e só quero iniciar um relacionamento amoroso quando estiver plena comigo mesma.
I know why I'm single and I will tell a few:
1. I'm young still(going to middle school soon).
2. I'm very strict-.
3. I'm introverted-.
4. Nobody sees me like a crush.
5. I always reject people and then I regret it. (Unless it's someone online then it's a straight no)
And that's all I can think off, I've been trying my best to change myself up a bit but it's not really working.
Highschooler here, still think I'm young for relationships lol
Yep, I’m right there with you
Hi! I'm 24 and relate to point 2-5. Trust me one day someone will be able to get past these walls you put up 😉
And you're right, you're young! Enjoy your youth no matter the relationship status
How can you reject people if “nobody sees you as a crush”?
You're going to middle school. Focus on being the best You! Being the Best You, gives You confidence in Yourself! Confidence is key!
I choose to be single, and I love it! I actually feel sad at the thought of potentially being in a relationship at some point.
I’m single because all the guys that have asked me out so far aren’t my type and I have no intentions of wasting time on short term relationship
I just want my weird , odd , smart crush to ask me out
I am an INFJ, and the primary reason why I am going to stay single is because a relationship would inevitably be a liability to my productivity and success plans. Unless my partner would forgo all the elements of an unproductive lifestyle and assiduously cowork with me, however such people nowadays are very rare, since most people establish relationships solely for entertainment-whether it is watching movies or doing sexual activities, and all other basic activities which the average couple does together. My criteria for a partner is very strict, and some people would assume that I am looking for a person who does not exist. The person whose character corresponds to my criteria exists, but endeavoring to discover such person would be a tremendous waste of time, since such people are very rare.
I'm an INFJ and I can see myself in a few of the reasons that were stated in this video. But in the end of the day, don't rely too much on your personality trait to live your life and just do what you think its best for you, being single isn't bad.
You made my day just by saying that my personality is the rarest one!
As INFP I can also relate to some highly idealistic/perfectionistic traits.
I feel for you INFJs. You are heroes. Realize your worth. Do not let in toxic influence. Iron dome.
Sorry to burst your bubble, the INFJ is usually single because of a few terrible dating/ relationship experiences. The only differences between the INFP and INFJ is the J can be single longer. But they still lower themselves and have horrible experiences. At least INFPs are trying. I think that's more noble in it's own way. It's not easy to take a chance.
As an INFJ i do experience these things but I think I'm not the only one experiencing on letting our walls down and being 'friendly' that is viewed by the other party as flirting or an act of wanting a relationship more than friendship, or should I say that being 'kind' to others gives off an overwhelming vibe to the point that they give a whole new meaning to it and most of those guys I got 'friendly' with developed an obsessive-like behavior that freaks me out everytime, so yeah that's one the reasons for being single.
I'm an INFJ and single and it's the way this notification felt like a personal attack to me-
SAME- 💀✋
I can completely relate to some of this but NOT all of this......I would rather be alone than to be with the wrong person. I'm waiting on God's best❤️💙💜
I wish you all the best.
gag!
Here are the timestamps
1) You won't settle for anyone other than your dream person. 0:44
2) You stress over small things 1:45
3) You wait for them to make the first move 2:18
4) You can be very stubborn 3:56
4:24
5) You see past the fake acts 4:24
6) You are very casual 4:57
7) Dating is a pain for you 5:29
Have a great day Psych2Goers! With all love.
Thnx.. it really helps ..
I've found that I really enjoy being single because relationships require more energy than I'm willing to give. I love the freedom I have and have realized that I usually end up losing myself in relationships and I also have commitment issues. I've been asked for my hand in marriage 6x and have turned them all down. To me it's a prison sentence so I stopped dating because I can't go any further into something more serious.🤷🤷🤷
I think another reason INFJs may still be single is because they're not being true to themselves. A lot of the time, because we are so different from others, we think we need to be more like them to fit in. And so we conform to others' ideas of who we should be, and then we come at dating from that perspective.
In reality, you may not be drawn to traits society or others have told you to look for. But it's only when you get really real with yourself that you can be drawn to others for reasons that are authentic to you. Just something I've been thinking about.
Isso é a pura verdade .Eu vivo tentando mudar minha personalidade para deixar as outras pessoas felizes , ele feliz ..Sinto que tenho a necessidade de mudar , porque sou alguem muito diferente , e ninguem gostaria de mim
@@vovokookie I know exactly what you mean. But I have to believe that when you're being authentic, the right person will love you just the way you are. A parte difícil é esperar.
@@ashley_cantave obrigada pelas lindas palavras 🥰💕🥺
@@vovokookie De nada!
This is a highly neurotic personality type. I was tested as an INFJ but I don't find I act this way anymore. I'm still extremely picky and so I'm content with being single because I won't settle for less than what I want.
Oddly enough other people seem more triggered by this than me. I don't let people make me feel bad for my standards so I guess this makes them feel bad about their own.
Love who you want but don't say it's what other's need to be happy.
I love my friends, I love my dog, and I enjoy meeting new people so I'm content.
I definitely feel the part about people being more triggered than me for my standards! I remember a group of people were trying to force me into being set up with this guy at my school, which I didn’t want because I didn’t know him, he was a mutual of my suitemate and knowing what I want also makes me not want to waste time with people if I’m not sure of their values (I.e. they want something casual) or if they would actually understand me. I’ve also had debates with friends over why I don’t want to date to much but they never understand that as an intuitive person, my interpersonal relationships can be incredibly deep. I have a small group of friends I would do anything for, and similarly I would act that way towards someone I was romantically interested in, but dating a lot of people just ends with a lot of disappointment if they don’t meet my standards or if this end and I’ve already put a lot of energy into this person. INFJ’d already feel A LOT I’m fr just trying to not feel negative emotions more intensely than I already so
This video speaks to me. That’s why I’m still single after 11 years 😂. I just gave up after my last relationship. I just do things as a group. It’s easier for me.
I think I'm just very scarred by abuse. Lots of emotional baggage.
Plus I'm not the most conventionally attractive individual, to say the very least 💀
This video completely explains absolutely everything. As a guy people tell me bro you have to get someone or you have to take initiative but I’m just not like that. I’m a very insecure overly analytical perfectionist and now I know it just isn’t only me. Thank you 😊 and I will now download your app.
This only applies to the ladies.
Every time I took the Myers-Briggs, it told me I was an INFJ. I’m glad that this time the results came back with me being more assertive. In the past I was consistently labeled as an INFJ-T (turbulent) which made me feel awful. I’m happy to have grown so much over the years.
Sometimes knowing your " WORTH" can leave you single for a very long time
Incredible person who is reading this. Want to let you know that EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE ALRIGHT. Blessings upon blessings come to you daily. Everything you need it’s on its way to you! Be ready to receive! You are healthy. You are strong. You are capable. True wealth is coming for you. You are blessed beyond measure. You are loved so much by many. Receive this TRUTH! Bless you always with everything great you deserve. You are greatness!
~❤️Nat
I’m single because it’s hard to find someone that come with peace and also being short plays a part, 7yrs single and it’s been peaceful but lonely
1.)You won’t settle for anyone other than your dream person-0:44- Pretty much, yes
2.)You stress over small things-1:46- No
3.)You wait for others to make the first move-2:18- well...kinda
4.)You can be very stubborn-3:56- No
5.)You see past fake acts-4:24- Yes
6.)You don’t do casual-4:57- Not quite. I usually auto-friendzone-ed myself
7.) Dating is a pain for you- Oh well....it's kinda power draining for me tho....
I am an INFJ but also on the autism spectrum. At 41, I have rarely met a woman who said "yes" to a date and still waiting on my first girlfriend. I like someone now but as much as my coworkers would like to see us together, she just wants to remain friends. She says she is aromantic. I can respect her wishes. Maybe someday another woman will come along and maybe not. I just say "It is what it is" and try to think of other things when possible.
I have taken the test many times throughout my lifetime and I always end up with INFJ. Unlike most here, I have been married twice and going through my second divorce. I feel like my picker is broken. I seem to attract narcissistic personalities. Even with everything I have been through, I still want a partner who understands me. My need for affection and my need for alone time. It’s such a push/pull in my relationships. Staying single would have saved me a great deal of heartache.
ok isfp.
I didn't know I was the rarest personality type... Introverted, Intuitive, Feeling, and Judging. I've always hated crowds, I'm an artist, so I like to look deeper into the details, expressions, body language, etc. I have developed huge social anxiety because of my over sensitive feeling, I take insults harshly because I overthink everything people say to me, and I take compliments extra nicely for the same reasons. Judgemental, I always make sure I know my opinion on everything and everyone. The truth is, everyone does this, just usually they do it subconsciously. Another reason I've developed a huge social anxiety is this, I'm afraid of people judging me like I judge them, this may seem hypocritical, but I understand that I can't do anything about it and learned to accept it. Though, it still scars me though, I can't even go out with close friends and not think about every word I say 5 times in advance, I barely talk just because I deem most things I want to say unnecessary or inappropriate. I fit this personality type like a glove, I guess that's why I feel so separate from all the other people my age, because I am.
you're not alone.
Well i don't think i have social anxiety but the judgemental part, i am. But the difference is, im not scared of people judging me or categorising me in some sorr of way. To me i don't call it judging people but trying to understand them by analysing them. I can good as well as bad or things that i dislike, i always try to figure out what makes them unique as a person, what makes them extraordinary, i try to search for good amazing things in them. And you know the best part? The more i see them grow and learn about them, the more i realise that some of my past observations were totally wrong, and they are all good at heart. The just have flaws, but if you know how to communicate with them, it'll all be smooth.
Now about the talking. Yes and a lot of times but not always, i tend to overthink. Like i would say something then i would start worry if it was good or wrong. But then i calm down, take a deep breathe, cleae my thoughts and my brain always hits me with the... they are your beloved friends, if you ever said anything bad, you know you can apologise for it. Tell them the reason and why you thought of saying it to make them understand your thinking. And most importantly, they are YOUR friends, they always got your back, like you have theirs. They will definitely understand you. Even if they don't. We are like brothers and sisters, and If not God, i would I've never met them, because they are just amzing. They are my churchmates my friends my brothers and sisters in God, and for all of us we testify that we were saved by our Lord Jesus Christ. And im just saying that, without God, i would be there,where you are but he has pushed me through it. Im not advertising about God, im not asking you to change, and also im not mentioning anything about Jesus's love for you or anything.
Am simply giving credit to my God, who has pushed me this far. Before i met my friends, i was stuck. Always so anxious. But i have improved in the name of Jesus and i am happy for myself. Because what YOU are going through, Hard is not even enough to describe it... but i pray for you my friend and whether you are a Christian or not, may God work wonders as he did me.😁
By the way,nowadays the rariest type of sixteen personality type is - ENTJ.Information that you have,and all who think as you, is no longer relevant
@@mikhailmatveev369 LMAO shit alr, I'ma go than
We are just the same. Don't be afraid. I don't even feel to be close to the people around my age. What the do is just unrelatable for me. I don't have any friends now, and that's okay.
Sadly, in my last relationship I did my best to stop doing most of the things that are described here... Perhaps I tried too hard? After we broke up I realized that we were never a good match and the main reason we stayed together was because I avoided disagreeing with as hard as I could and pretended to not notice her little lies. I tried to be the person she wanted me to be because I thought it was the only way someone could love me. I felt relieved after we broke up
Video titles never fails to kick me right into rock bottom.
But the content is always good.
Yes me too
I don't mind being single. A married man in all seriousness told me a few years ago, "Stay single!"
Now I'm 47 years old and since 18 years in my own and truly satisfied with it.
In a recent study, INFJs are no longer the rarest MBTI type. The ENTJ is the rarest.
The rarest personality types in order: (Rarest to common)
1) ENTJ
2) ENFJ
3) INFJ
4) INTJ
5) ENTP
6) INTP
7) ESFJ
8) ESFP
9) ESTP
10) INFP
11) ISFP
12) ENFP
13) ISFJ
14) ESTJ
15) ISTP
16) ISTJ
- INTP
at least we aren't the rarest XD , a good thing, we may find others like us
@@shadowg3 ikr..
its a good new for infj, yay. But i wonder if people typed themselves right, most want to be an intuitive type and a lot mistyped them as infj.
@@NganHoang-dy8el I find it possible because we are naturally biased. Because we are naturally biased, it is easy for us to mistype ourselves as something else.
I used to call myself an INFJ because I want to be seen as "rare". But as I start to familiarize myself with the MBTI world, I realized that I am an INTP, not INFJ.
Omg....this....this litterally helped me so much in understanding what is going on. I was litterally so lost to why everyone can get into a relationship so fast and be so non-shalont about it ect. I can't tell you the sense of relief that has started to come off my shoulders while watching you videos. It's helping me so much in being able to put a name to what I'm feeling.this entire video hit every point and issue I have to a T and makes so much sense. Thank you for what your doing. As someone who struggles with mental health and doesn't have resources to professional help, it's so nice to be able to work thru some things and see others go thru same scenarios. Please keep up the amazing work, your are helping so many 💞 thank you!
I’ll give you one because I’m focusing on my career so that’s that .
I watched your past video and determined then I am definitely an INFJ . I am single and want to have a healthy relationship, but always find myself hesitant to ever ask anyone who may be interested out. Part is fear from past negative experiences in relationships, but actually I don't think I've ever asked anyone out! I am seriously considering checking out the dating site because I truly love your videos and trust the information given. Thank you for always being there with another much needed insightful video!
As ENFP i can't actually see problems but certain attraction for those traits, may be a problem in a way or another i can fully understand it why and instead of arguing i wouldn't mind to help and deal with those issues.
I have an ENFP friend I really love platonically 🖤 you guys are amazing ✨
Na verdade, é justamente esse o interesse que desejamos encontrar num parceiro. Posso estar enganada, mas ainda acho que o amor da minha vida será um homem ENFP maduro e cheio da presença de Deus.😀🙌
According to the test, I'm an INFJ and your videos have just confirmed that I'm probably one of them....
Thanks 💯
Had 7 of all these, completily agree with all these points, lots of time people think I'm too into it, but I just want to be loved guys, thats it
Being single is fun for me! 😆 I can’t imagine having to give my attention and energy to another person yet. I think love will find me when I’m ready to give and receive love unconditionally.
An INFJ here :P since my birthday is on valentine's Day it's fascinating to see everyone with their SO outside, while I'm celebrating my birthday with my family near them haha
It’ll either happen or it won’t. Here is to an amazing journey regardless 🥂
friendly reminder that there's a possibility that you're mistyped if you only took the tests, especially 16 personalities lol if you really wanna know your type learn cognitive functions ! super interesting
Im a 33 year old gay INFJ, still single, and I 1,000% agree with this list! I don't date a lot and communication means a lot to me.
Still single at 52 and still childless because I love cat's more.
Pahleeeeeze!!
We want a video on how to not be single always while being an INFJ
I'm an INFJ-T!!! Soooo.... I feel the same way about all of these. However, I want to change and become better! I don't want to wait for anyone or others. I'm starting to slowly change. I started making conversations instead of being on the receiving end sometimes. It's tough, but I cant continue to hide myself anymore. It is what it is.
(Slowly though... I'm not about to be an extrovert. Lol)
I related to quite a bit of this. I’m 23 f never had a bf and sometimes I want a relationship, but then I think how bothersome and almost impossible it’s be to find someone I like, in which the feeling is mutual, and then just change my mind. There are so many things that should match up before getting into a relationship- physical attraction , emotional intelligence, chemistry between personalities and individual habits and so forth. I have met many people who I connected with emotionally, but the physical aspect has always been a struggle for me. Despite all this, I do want a relationship someday. But for now, I can say that I’m almost 100% with continuing to stay by myself and pursue my hobbies and career/life aspirations.
I’m not entirely sure how relatable this is to the INFJ personality type, but sometimes I doubt if I could ever get married as I enjoy alone time far too much.
Is anyone else the same as an INFJ?
Também gosto do meu tempo sozinha, mas muitas vezes desejo sim ter um companheiro do qual possa ter conexão profunda.
Another reason why you’re still single is because you recently went through a bad breakup and you’re not ready to date again
It didn’t happen to me but that could be one of the reasons 🤷♀️
another reason is that you are basically a hermit cuz you dont like social interaction
@@justsomeguywithnoeyes7303 lol
@@szalover4888 time to move on
To be completely honest, I wouldn’t mind being in a relationship, but I just do not have the patience or personality for it. Not to mention that I am especially not romantic.
INFJs are real sweethearts..
As an ENFJ, I really admire them😍
The fact I'm rarely attracted to people romantically probably doesn't help.
As an INFJ, I can totally relate to this!
I refuse to settle for less
I don't care about his money
looks 🤔 well looks is just a bonus
But overall I just want a healthy relationship and longevity
So don't be afraid to make first move if you will meet someone who has such potential.
@@Kunigunda897 I will not chase ☠️
I want someone that's interested in me first for once.
@@aduhaduh4426, no one said to chase, but you should show specific interest, not just give a signs, people aren't mind readers. And we don't live in the 50s, dating isn't the same. Some can be shy and maybe hurt by the last relationships. So like i said, if you will see some potential in someone, don't be afraid to show it, otherwise you can miss your chance.
brooo I've never felt more understood, the reasons stated in this video really hits home lol
Me, an INFJ: minding my own business and thinking about being an INFJ
Sees this video: TARGETED👀
as an INFJ, all of these apply to me, except the idealism. Learned a bit ago that nobody is perfect and we all have flaws
I got INFJ the first time I took the personality test (I later got INTJ though). So far with dating, my Aspergers fixating has gotten in the way to the point where people compared me to a Yandere, said I have a strong personality, or tell me that I am too obsessive. In reality, I just can't help but see my love interest as a special interest and want to work really hard for my happy ending in life. I also have a friends to lovers stratgey going on in my head that unfortunately rarely happens to me IRL.
I'm an infj also I can't make the first move for fear of overburdening them or for fear of being ignored even when I'm socializing with people I feel relatively uncomfortable so I like to be on my own (in my comfort zone) so I guess these are compelling reasons why I've never been in a relationship before...
I'm an INFJ and I totally relate to this. Luckily, I'm happily married, but I have issues making friends.
I was raised by narcissists. I keep working on myself, unraveling their bs and I recently discovered the trick is to listen to people’s wants and dreams because it’s highly likely that nobody else is hearing them on that. I’ve recently made friends this way. Just by hearing them more.
Damn dude, this video really hits the feels man.....EVERY signs listed in this video describes me, not even going to lie. I didn't even know what an INFJ was until now, but I guess I was one all along. ESPECIALLY the one about waiting for the other to make the first move. I've always wanted to make the first move, but always end up failing or backing out. I have more to add, but as of right now, that's all I could think of. If I have anymore to add, i'll come back and make an edit, but yeah, this hits the feels
Yes, totally me... All those points are speaking about me, and although I would like to soften some... I prefer to be single then in a relationship that it's not worth it.
With that being said, thank you for the video, I really love it, and thank you for helping us understand ourselves better as well as others.😉
My god This UA-cam channel really loves INFJ’s so much
I am an introvert, I do feel like a burden on people, I am very cautious about people in general and I can tell a person's mood or personality based on their attitude or tone towards me.... I am unsure if people really do enjoy me or want to connect with me because I don't want to be left behind
As a single INFJ I feel called out. The video is pretty relatable.