No that makes sense. Because as a young Black woman, I was always taught that a degree was necessary to entering at least the middle class. Very: “Don’t have children before you have a degree.” Made me think about what boys my age were being taught instead.
I don't think they were taught anything past a certain point. You ever notice how people always say it's easier to parent boys? It's because a lot of people stop truly parenting their boys or caring about their emotional well-being by the time they're teenagers.
@@xxxjackson1489Because fathers and even some mothers believe their sons will be alright no matter what and a lot of that has to do with pushing "traditional masculinity " out of fear. They're so afraid of what their friends think and families think about their male children , they install these shallow and outdated ideas about masculinity into their sons regardless of how that screws up their worldview and which leads to resentment towards women when they grow up into being men and realized that women aren't obligated to take care of them or bear their children. Never underestimate how parental pressure can mess you up....
As a boy of the 90s and 2000s, I can tell you that I was taught the same thing about getting a degree. It would be more accurate to say that it was drilled into my skull.
As a woman with a bachelors degree and about to start a masters degree (both in STEM fields) here is what I'll say. Getting an education is about emotional resilience. Can you get a bad grade on a test/project and go back and study harder instead of giving up? Getting an education is about working in community. Can you get your research and big capstone group projects done? Getting an education is about self-control. Can you deal with the delayed gratification of long-term goal setting? Getting an education is about humility in the face of things you know. Can you silence your ego and listen to those who know more than you? It takes more than just raw intellectual ability; it takes emotional strength.
I totally agree with you. This is a great comment. I totally understand that a lot of people go to college to get well paying jobs. However, it's also important to acknowledge that the value of higher education extends beyond the development of cognitive skills. It can also provide opportunities for personal growth, social development, and the acquisition of practical skills and knowledge that can be applied in a variety of careers and life situations.
Thank you for saying this because I’m struggling as a nursing student and two jobs and I’m working hard but seeing others who did it gives me strength that I can do it too❤
@@SierraLQuickPLEASE continue in nursing school! My late mother was a nurse. I rarely tell people she was an LPN because of the nursing hierarchy - she was also a Charge Nurse overseeing RNs & BSNs on her job, because she was a dang good nurse. The only reason she "only" had an LPN was because she went back to school in her 40s, the divorced mother of 3, including one child in college at the time. She wasn't paying for my college, I was - we were essentially homeless, also. She lived in a one-room apartment over her friend's restaurant & shared a bathroom with several other people. I lived on campus or in temporary housing. She had to have a friend in the car business put a lien on her car title so she could get food stamps while she went to nursing school, because welfare wanted her to sell her car - then she wouldn't be able to finish nursing school! This was in the 1980s, laws are a little different now, but she struggled so hard to become a nurse. She worked in long-term care for 19 years. Then, at 62, she was diagnosed with a terminal cancer. I was working on my PhD at the time, so I took a leave of absence from my studies to care for her. I never completed my dissertation after that and I continue to regret that, but I don't regret caring for my mom. Being a nurse was the most rewarding thing she ever did, and that doesn't make me jealous (as the result of one of the other "things" she pursued - motherhood) at all. I was so proud of her. We need more people who know what it's like to sacrifice to go into nursing. I believe that's what made my mom such a good nurse. She got very frustrated with other nurses who took their jobs for granted, who didn't recognize the humanity in patients, or understand that we all struggle. She died from complications from Multiple Myeloma (she developed sepsis, I suspect either from her [dialysis] tesio or groshong being accessed incorrectly or left open). The hard part is temporary. Then you get to be a nurse for the rest of your life, however long that is, and if your heart is in it, it will never be long enough. Good luck! Remember, school is temporary suffering, but your education lasts a lifetime & no one can take that off of you.
@ thank you for sharing your and your mothers story. I am a divorced single mother of two, work two jobs and am I 4 credits shy of being a full time student because my bios expired. I’m starting over after being out of school for almost 13 years, and leaving a DV situation. It’s been tough but I want to make a great life for my children since we are struggling as well I moved back in with family and pay massive rent to help out and other personal bills but like you said my education will be forever and I’ve always dreamed of actually being a doctor and opening up a clinic but with this economy I had to change routes and I think I’ll enjoy being a nurse more because my responsibilities will be more geared towards my patients and not have to be overwhelmed by other hospital responsibilities and not have enough time to prioritized my patients.
Looking back on my experience as a young woman, I realize the men who were most howling about wanting a traditional wife brought nothing to the relationship aside from fast food jobs, skid marks and an inability to find the laundry hamper... Jobs in the trades are more in demand than those requiring degrees
@@Zora87Peace If you are willing to do the work and also interact with clients professionally. When people hire, they also look at the contractor's attitude as much as they do the skills! But hopefully men take these jobs because they love them, not because they love money... their clients will find out which one is the truth, haha
Fun fact, education used to be male dominated. Also, there is a great need for male teachers. Boys and girls need both male and female teachers/ role models.
More broadly, I think children will benefit from having teachers who have very diverse backgrounds and identities. However, I think it's even more important that children have high-quality competent teachers and adequate school resources even if the amount of diversity ends up being less than ideal.
Some of my male teachers were very good at teaching, but even when I was in school not so long ago men were uncommon. When jobs become populated by around 60% women, men tend to avoid that job. Til this day, the trades and manual labor jobs have been their stronghold that they refuse to let women into at any cost unless the women are kept physically isolated at work.
@@YouKnowMeDuhMen don't like doing anything that can be pursued as feminine. They move away as soon as women enter and start dominating. This can be seen everywhere. This is why men in STEM, especially in TEM, harass women peers and colleagues to force them to quit so they can keep STEM women free. So that the thing they do is not considered feminine or emasculating. But women will dominate and conquer every field in no time. It's just women's nature to conquer hardship and prevail🤷🏻.
Bros, if by traditional values mean keeping a tradwife and single income, you better hustle like crazy and make 3x median in the area. You make that kind of money then we talk.
Exactly. But I guarantee you that is not the kind of marriage they were looking for. Those of us from the black community already know that that "traditional values" for our parents and their parents before them involved the woman working too. The idea of the traditional family structure is something that a very specific demographic had the privilege of.
These dudes have NOTHING but excuses and I am tired of it! 🤭 🛑blaming EVERYTBODY, WM,BW, the Republicans, the Democrats....the list is endless. I am embarrassed for them... 🙄
As a senior ,college educated black man that voted for Harris, I can’t imagine how it feels for men who are entering the workforce or starting a trade at this point in their lives especially without a degree. I absolutely despise my college and definitely see it as a scam but the opportunities it can provide is what gives me hope. To be in a situation where you have very little money,Can’t get your needs met and probably have little to no friends. Though I do see them as fools I do understand why men with little to no options voted for the guy who pandered to their anger and fear
A lot of people are talking about trades which are awesome career opportunities for someone who knows what they are doing. While these trades are ultimately good, people fail to mention how they are great jobs that can help you pay for college/grad school and further your education. 1. Great credentials to have regardless. 2. Exit strategy. You can fall back on a degree but if something happens to your job/business or in your field, you can still rely on your degree. Plus you can learn a lot about the world that you won’t learn in trade school.
Tbf, some trades are awesome careers that isn’t just back breaking labor. I found out the crunch and stress of university (while working full time so I can eat) isn’t for me so I’m entering a sonography program. The medical field is always a great place to be in terms of availability and impact imo.
@ That sounds awesome! Good planning for your future is a skill they don’t teach in school. Your credits keep, so you don’t have to knock it all out. A few classes here and there is better than burning out and it’s just for a Plan B anyways. But if you got it, you got it.
@@DG-gx8pnTbf, jobs in the medical field such as sonography, are the cross roads between trade school and traditional college. A lot of work was put into those particular fields so that the hospital can function much like a factory line. Should certain machines no longer be used, you will have enough knowledge and training to flow into another field of study. You also have to learn a great deal of biology.
@@kwyatt261 I respect plumbers and welders. Where do you get hate? All I’m saying is if one works their trade well, they don’t have to choose between school and a trade. You can do both and not have to do school first.
@@nooneinparticular3468 well I do believe it’s more than that but the state I’m in I not only get fasfa but I also get a grant for the state I live in and a grant for black females it has helped me get my classes paid for
@@SierraLQuick cool, as far as I've heard there are grants for all BAME, most grants aren't split by gender in any state (yet). And things like sport scholarships are still there and usually given more to male students than the female students so I just don't see the reason for the gender divide being so wide in education 🤷♀️ With the resources available seem to be the same for both genders, there's better school support in this generation than ever before and yet the boys aren't doing as well, why?
@ well the reason for the gender split is single parent hood. One for single dads and one for single moms it’s a private company/business for black individuals by black individuals. There is also a grant just for black people alone from the same company and another company for all minorities. But you have to know where to look and I was told about the grant.
I got my BA degree in 1993 and I have been a professional writer celebrating my 30th anniversary this year. However, its a different world in 2024. A lot of men these days want to as i say ride by stagecoach in the 21st century and they foolishly think being a man with no skills , credentials and education is no problem in the world of work and career. They are already losing out.
New subscriber. Excellent thought provoking content. As a single mom, with a 27 year old son, even when I was married, I was always the primary breadwinner. My son has no issues with women making money, it's what he knows. With the prevalence of working moms out here in the world, how do we understand these young men who don't see women as leaders and earners, when many of them were led and fed by women? Where is all this hateful misogyny originating? I know about all the podcasts, but I also know that without susceptibility, that rhetoric has no place to gain ground. How do we get these men back on track? Women, living independently have no reason to settle for someone who treats them badly, or worse are threatening, and have no ambition or direction in life. This election, and the aftermath, seems to indicate that there is an ever widening chasm. Good stuff. Thanks.
@sp123 What a weird perspective. My comment must have really bothered you. Nearly every man who's ever lived was raised by a woman, whether there was a man around or not. You're not even correct about my kid, and that's not some "blindness" on my part. I've met most of the girls he's dated/lived with, except the ones he dated in college. That's just some made up junk to put down women.
Sorry, but if women are the breadwinners then men should do housework. Most women ending up doing everything for these men. That's what these men have Problem wirh, with doing "female work". Most of them would love a woman providing for them, but also they want to lead and not do the housework, this is where problems accure.
It is concerning for sure. Some of what I have heard recently is this fear of men being replaced. As women, we find a huge sense of relief that we aren't in danger when we have the means to live on our own. But I can see how from men, us talking about being independent can make them feel completely alone. They don't know how deep the resentment in women goes, how sick and tired we are of nobody believing we can do cool things. Moms need to ensure they inspire their kids to lead **alongside** women. Us working together will produce the best results.
Really well said. I'm female and was taught by my mom to go to school. Because if I do someday get married, I need that as a backup plan. Now granted, this applies if your husband suddenly passes away, but uh... you probably already know what scenario we were thinking of. Women will do whatever it takes to escape. We also think with the long-term in mind, that mobility that a college degree gives. I am very happy to hear all the stories of people making more money than me. But the thing is, you really might have to start all over if you switch industries. A degree really prevents you from getting locked into the one profession you've been trained for. This is why I hear of a lot of people who once dismissed school going back after 5 years of trade. And believe me, those people finish. By then, they're adults who can make that commitment.
Oh, so those of them that have mothers willing to put up with their shenanigans just live at home for the rest of their lives and the rest will just end up. Hell, anywhere.
I appreciate this analysis, I am also worried for the young boys and the future, I've been crying out to anyone who will listen about how we raise girls to take care of the boys that we neglect
I'm not sure where this idea comes from. Could you explain? Because on my end I see boys and men being abandoned due to hardheadedness. People get tired if talking to brick walls.
@@ladybluelotus Its about Change as a whole society... having empathy for one nother therefore understanding of one another and therefore u can handle upon it
@@ladybluelotusThank you! All of the boys in my family were given cars, our moms helped them even write papers to get scholarships, worked 2hobs to afford their athletic equipment etc, while they were disrespectful and ungrateful. The girls were left on our own, working by 15 and saving our money. Well guess what, most of the men dropped out of college, or either didn’t go at all despite the resources that were available bc some of them could’ve went to college under their dads GI Bill. They have too many kids that our grandparents are helping to support, still hustling at 35 or working job that can not sustain the amount of children they have and sadly some are in prison bc of their choices. 😢 We can’t keep blaming the system. These are the choices that they are making on top of constantly being enabled.
Men neglect their own sons. Sons often do not appreciate their mothers influence unless it is cruelly beaten into them. And I am not joking. There reaches a point where if you lack a very firm hand when they reach a certain age they literally lose respect for you and everything you stand for even if it's good and righteous because nothing you can ever be will ever amount to their internal idea of the strength and power of a man. This is not a problem women can solve by doing anything other than refusing to have sons or refusing to be with men for as long as men think that being an absentee parent is ok. Women cannot be role models for men. A line must be drawn somewhere, and oftentime it is drawn by the sons, not the mothers. Once puberty hits, their heads just go elsewhere.
i think about a couple things form this: first, young men get lower grades than young women and lower test scores, this has always been the case and it creates an innate tendency that as secondary education hold higher standards for acceptance, Women will get accepted into higher education at higher rates than Men. Even if there are still simpler forms of higher education for underachieving people to go to, the lack of variety in options compared to the cost factor is going to be more discouraging towards Men statistically. The second thing, is that the non-higher education options for economic participation are very poor quality, skill trade options even with training or just plain labor options are very hard, time consuming, low paying, dangerous, and most of all competitive and anti-social/anti community. The capitalist industrial methods of production, remove the options for Artisanal practice and commodify them into skill trade submission to employers. Most consumer items that would fall into artisanal categories, have no need to be produced industrially but are monopolized by capitalists and that opportunity is robbed from its natural place in the individual and community market. A ceramic bowl has not innovated or changed in thousands of years, its consumer demands have not changed either, but we allow capital industrialists to have that market when it can be produced by individual artisans just as functionally and cost effectively compared to usage. Artisanship is a profoundly fulfilling occupation, but skill trade industrial work is just disparaging laborious work.
Something else to offer is when times are hard a college educated couple can move across the country and follow the jobs. We moved with our kids and pets. We purchased homes on one income so if one was without a job for a short time, the unit did not suffer. Mind you, our degrees were door openings so they allowed us multiple types of industries to seek employment. Trade certificates would allow people to do the same! Too many people don’t want to leave their area even for a few years to take a job that gives them experience. This too limits. Keep all options open. My mind keeps coming back to “what do you bring to the table?” Is it a life of struggle? Before getting a degree, I struggled on my own. Unless, you have as much hustle as I do to better our life (earning potential) Yeah, nope. Be a partner.
Spoken so eloquently! I'm noticing that many political pundits want to talk around this issue and focus on aspects they can control. And since no one can change gender/race/cultural preferences in candidates, there seems to be a reluctance to admit the majority of Americans aren't ready for a woman president.
Traditional values to control her and have the best. Modern values when it comes to taking responsibilities. Men only want 50/50 went it suits them. 90/10 when it doesn't.
I think one of the sadder parts for men who are falling into this camp too is it'll be a self fulling prophecy if they get it. They want a trad wife that relies on them which can work but also leads to a unbalanced power dynamic in the relationship which can lead to resentment, infidelity, etc. These same men say all women care about is money and you can't trust them. Well if you put women in a position where they are dependent on men then yes there will probably be more relationships based around monetary worth and less faithfulness. It's a recipe for less fulfilling relationships.
Refusing to educate oneself means that you are refusing an opportunity to show that you can accept information in a structured manner, process it efficiently, and apply it correctly. As much as you can worry about these young men, you also have to admit that these men are adults and they have to make choices for themselves. Actions either have benefits or consequences. They can't get upset at anyone but themselves if they refuse to wholeheartedly analyze the consequences. The real point of concern is whether those who suffer will recognize the root of their issues and make better choices or if they will just keep on with whatever they're doing hoping for someone to give them an easy break. Failure happens. How we respond when failure occurs draws a definitive line in the sand; there are only two types of people.
For the people obsessed with trades, you still needs some form or education, business principles and/or higher learning. You body will not be able to sustain you through that trade job. I’m seeing this with a lot on men in my family and even men that I’ve dated. They’re worn out by 45, barely hanging on by 50, can’t take a day off work or even think about getting sick bc many don’t have PTO which is something we take for granted.
I won't lie to you, I feel kind of trapped between these two ideas. I had parents that made sure I planned to go to college, that I did well in primary and secondary school. I think there should be a conversation around the ways in which I feel like it did not really serve me well as a boy, especially a black boy. Even at the time, the parallels between prison and school were increasingly evident to me. I felt like I was to either be put on a pedestal as a model of behavior and excellence, and that standard was my life regardless of what I actually wanted, or I could have been cast aside as lesser and deserving of a lower status not just in school but in life. At the same time, College has largely been great until I don't have the support I need to do well. It's not affordable, and it's not built for people who also work, at least in the circumstances I've been in so I'm 30 and I still haven't finished. I owe a lot of money, but I can't get any loans. I can't afford to be there, but the more I work the less time I have to devote to the schoolwork itself. It's got me in a miserable place that is almost worse than when I had left college in 2015. I didn't like that I wasn't regarded with respect or dignity by other people, that effect is also real even though I run a business. I'm self employed. I do work I take pride in and enjoy. So, to sum it up: I have no issue with women having done so well. That was not an issue for me in voting for Kamala. I just feel like I should be deserving of love, of dignity, of respect even though I don't have this degree and yet clearly I do so need it and at the same time, the path to it is marred with chicanery if you don't come from priveledge. I'm watching myself slip through the cracks in the system. I reject the notion of traditional values in general, education or no, but that also hasn't meant that seeking an education has served me well in my own life.
But I would also add this to talking about people who came out for Biden but did not for Harris. I think there's a backlash effect in the conversation around student debt forgiveness. I still voted for Kamala, like I said, but a huge motivating factor for me voting for Joe was that he promised us, me, $10,000 in student debt relief. That would have made a world of difference for me in my life and I am actually still somewhat resentful that that did not happen. Maybe it did for some other folks, folks who've been paying for decades, folks who are public sector. I get that. I support that. I'm happy for them, but I can't pretend this wasn't a broken promise not just from Biden but from Democrats at large. I think there's a degree to which people are holding Kamala accountable for the sins of party.
Your goal should have been looking for degrees that will allow you to live outside the US. You will never find the "love, dignity, and respect," you are looking for in America.
Who is not giving you respect & dignity because of your incomplete degree? These are internal. As someone with a similar experience working in higher education college access; that (insecurity) went away when my performance outdid my degreed counterparts. I was sure working in a selective environment meant EVERYONE was smarter, better, more skilled. No. My dignity is internally validated by the quality of my work. Now a degree would elevate but it doesn’t break. The respect is something you can give yourself then demand from others. The few people in your life who probably don’t even have one, that you feel are judging you don’t care half as much as your insecurities do. This is projection, because I doubt people are thinking this much about your degree. Give yourself respect, dignity and honor for your skills, as you show up others will reciprocate this energy.
Hey look. If you can hire someone to manage your business for long enough that you only need to come in 2-3 days of operation- do that. Apply for grants. Not loans. Stack some money on the side for a year to buffer yourself. If you have family that can help you with anything and they are willing, ask them. Dont just up and give up on college became it looks bleak. I'm speaking from a JC student's perspective, but there are 1001 opportunities sitting there in their financial aids offices that if you just ask, you might just stumble upon something worth while. You gotta get out of YOUR funk man. You're 30. There's opportunities everywhere if you have an open mind to look for it. My JC will _pay_ you just to go to school if you qualify. FAFSA will provide you grants. If you really wanted to go to school, nothing would stop you. Get out your head and make a plan to get it done.
This is the story of a lot of folks who may not have the ability to put it into words without fear of being seen as a failure or making excuses. As someone who graduated form a prestigious school known for its STEM programs, the college game is very much about a network. If you just come into it, it is hard. My brother thanked me recently. He said if it wasn’t for my finishing school and my career in tech, none of the rest of them would have been able to graduate. (He had a really weird period of alpha male podcaster cult so I cut him off for a while). He told everyone that it was I who I found them support systems, study aides, and provided financial assistance. He said some of his friends did not even know HOW to ask for help. Some did not even know where in the process they were failing some they just dropped out. My working class parents just did not have access to all of that.
Bottom line, it's gonna take two salaries to make it in this economy! Also, marriages are supposed to be "loving partnerships!" We're supposed to have one bank account that the money goes into and both converse about how the money is to be spent. These guys looking to "lead" women are going to be single because of that way of thinking. And outside of highschool, adults will need additional education to give themselves an edge in the employment pool. REMOVE ALL THE CRAZY TALKING POINTS FROM YOUR HEAD! You've got to be appropriate to attract someone of like mind! Unless you want to be left out of society likeba hermit.
Interesting my Grandfather got his teaching job because he severed in Korea. The thinking was the the students wouldn't set out of line knowing their teacher had just fought in a war.
I think there is something wrong with our current system that requires a four year degree and internship to get entry level jobs. It’s wild to know what stands in the way of me living a life with my head above water is solely due to a degree that in reality does not show my competence at all. To say that I am good at my career in spite of my time in college would be an understatement. The choice of getting into the middle class being do you want to go in debt and hopefully graduate in four years and then hopefully make enough money or be so academically gifted that people will pay for you to go just sucks to me. Idk a single person in college that has a positive attitude about their actual education unless it’s in a hard science or math related subject. America needs to do more to combat the price of college- well not like that’s gonna happen now
@ yes that is what I believe they shouldn’t…. Is this the answer you were looking for? Could I have been more specific about what education should require, yes. I’m not talking about that though. I’m talking about the fact that if you want to make even 20 dollars an hour for a job you need to have a degree. The state of my education is pathetic and embarrassing to anyone who has experience in my field.
If you don't go for a university degree you better have a plan in place to get to where you wanna be that holds to scrutiny. I'm not one to say that a degree is necessary, it would be hypocritical on my part. I personally didn't get one although I was at my last semester before I dropped out. I consider myself lucky though, and learned what I needed to get there. If you don't have a plan get a degree at the very least while exploring what interests you.
@KolyaGerasimov-USA It was in my plans but I have been getting constant significant promotions every year which has delayed me from finising. It is in my benefit that I am Canadian though so tuition was much cheaper. I do kind of like the aspect that looking back, my time in university was more for the knowledge than for the degree.
It's not cost when it comes to college or education they are simply choosing not to they don't have any interest in any type of education they actively resist it especially conservative men who feel that education is synonymous with the elite so they turn it away But because I don't have the education to understand certain things that are going on in society they can't comprehend that with an education they cannot get a higher paying job without some type of education of some sort and there aren't a lot of labor type of jobs like factories unless they want to go be a farmer which they won't because those are low wages that immigrants are doing so even if they all get deported though those wages aren't going to really come up like that it's still going to be minimum wage which for citizen is not enough to live off of and they can't get what they all want to achieve which is what's making them so angry and intolerable when it comes to being around these people interacting with them or even holding a conversation with him even if it's not an intellectual conversation you just can't hold conversations with them because they are so disagreeable and they are so unable to hold a simple conversation cuz they are so angry and want to blame somebody for something because they can't comprehend that because they refuse to be a productive memory of society in a way that makes them enough income to survive and take care of themselves they are not going to be a value to anyone else to be taken seriously enough to get the patriarchy respect that normally they would get automatically but that's not the case anymore women have more respect for themselves they demand more respect from everyone they have buying power and they have their own freedom so they don't have to be around anyone who is not worth their time and men who can't even take care of themselves and pay their own bills can't go around expecting people to want to be thrilled to hang out with someone who doesn't have their s*** together and it's causing this disconnect because they continue to expect that women will want to interact with him and will not is not the case they take it out on everyone around them which doesn't help either so they don't have an education to be able to comprehend the simple thing that this is what capitalism is and if you choose not to participate you don't get to have any of the benefits that capitalism affords men under the patriarchy and until they learn that they're going to drive a lot of people away from them because they are insufferable to be around demanding respect and and all these things within have nothing else to offer other people Don't be mad no one is seeking you out or wants to put up with you this is why they have to find someone to blame cuz they can't comprehend why they aren't entitled to something so they become racist or they become sexist or they become misogynistic or they become xenophobic whatever it is to blame somebody else to explain why they can't get something in life it has to be someone else's fault because someone else took that opportunity for me someone else is benefiting why I'm being punished they don't believe that it could be something that they are actually doing to cause their problems or they refuse to acknowledge information facts logic education that would help them understand why the system is like this and why they are having so much issues with it and how they can fix these problems we didn't build capitalism we didn't build the patriarchy and we didn't build the society where we have to work to get the things that we need or be homeless
This is also why countries like China and India are catching up, as there's little gap between "masculinity" and education. Its a recent step that women are encouraged into the workforce as much as men, so its not necessarily more progressive - but a man with an education is a man with status, and that intertwines with their masculinity. The message right wing media is sending to men in the West, is that we've lost our connection to being physically strong, so that's why your mental health is in decline. Since that's not how anyone can make money for about 50 years or so, then we'll run into the problem you described in this video.
This is an important clip. I probably got maybe/almost two decades on marquis. Yes I have a traditional family. My wife stays home...i had 3 kids in rapid succession planning on one more. But i stated that late. Did my wife have a career? Yes. Did she want to be a mom? Yes. Was the conversation about her stop working take five minutes? Yes? I am a toxic male damnit. As in I did the things to be the leader of my household. I already preplanned whomever i married to not work...as in her income didn't matter to me. I also choose a wife that can go in "command" mode when needed. Hell, i am trying to convince her to start a business with her skills. My family is a team...we think in family unit terms not this toxic individualism crap. My wife recently said to me "you do let me rest in my femininity" at random. That's the goal boys. You have to do the things to earn the position and letting her rest is a KPI. Is college a path for that? maybe? A business works just as good...business works better.
The role of action movies & other media aimed at boys also needs to be considered as to be negativity impacting young males such as video games were they murder women.
I wanted this to be separate. I do see people here talk about the trades. They can be great fields to work in, if you are where the work is and if you don't mind sacrificing your body for it.
Unfortunately, they typically don't unless you're part of a union in the state you're employed in. Non-union HVAC technicians, plumbers, electricians, and carpenters make significantly less than their unionized counterparts. There's a lot more unlicensed non-union workers engaging in these fields compared to the people who are licensed and unionized.
They pay well for not having a degree and low barrier to entry. My wife has a friend and girl makes 200k to 350k as a lawyer. She doesn't talk to black men who can't hold a conversation at the same level so she is often single. Women make up a ton of law and medicine and shortly engineering. Nothing beats education in terms of opportunities. Sure a guy can get far in carpentry but they aren't making 200k plus unless they own a business. But compare that to law firms where 500k is chump change or software where 10-50 million buyout a simply all decent windfall. In my white suburban area, nobody is telling their kids to do blue collar work unless they believe they can't make it to college. College is just better.
Those jobs can be too physically demanding. I remember one carpenter that teachs here in youtube that said that he started with a carpentry youtube channel and other business because his knee and back couldn't continue with normal construction. So, even if everything goes well, they will need lower healthcare costs to keep working.
@@AlgorithmOfTruth no, they still do. I know a lot of guys making 60-80 an hour as non-union electricians. I know a lot of people with a degree not doing that
@miatomi That's anecdotal. Of course there are exceptions to that, such as your example, but that's not the case overall throughout the US. Last year, non-union tradesmen earned 86% (14% disparity) of what their unionized counterparts did. Source: www.bls.gov/news.release/union2.nr0.htm
Honestly what discouraged me from going past my bachelors was getting to freely interact with social science PhDs on Twitter and realizing that I wasn’t going to grow as a person inside the classroom. I do plan on going back when it can supplement my skills though.
No you don't need a college education. There are blue college jobs that pay 80k to 100k. You are a snob toward non college men . Me and a lot of black men who never when to college and raised families making 100k a year. Today men can make money in the right position. What about men who go to college and come out college and cannot make enough money to live by themselves. You should know and learn about blue collar jobs that need workers bad. Plumbers, power plant operators, welders, electrical workers, paper mill workers, steel plants, auto workers, etc. Just because you have a college degree don't make you an expert on life. Many are these blue college workers are married and raising kids. I see them every day. Until you are married and git kids and doing goid decent day to day work how can you label aoo young men the same.
@@BeautifulEarthJa I think something to keep in mind is that getting an education is unobtainable for many people. It's really expensive and you're not guaranteed a job when you graduate. It can feel like a game of needing to know the right people and just earning a piece of paper. It's like a pay to play system. I do think that getting an education is power, whatever form that comes in, even if you teach yourself things by going to the library on your own and reading, it's really beneficial. But I can understand how paying for an education can be a turn off for people as well.
It should always be about finding a mate. No matter the scenario job or education your main focus should be finding a lady who you want to have kids with. That's the number 1 important thing and I will not change my mind on this.
No that makes sense. Because as a young Black woman, I was always taught that a degree was necessary to entering at least the middle class. Very: “Don’t have children before you have a degree.” Made me think about what boys my age were being taught instead.
I don't think they were taught anything past a certain point. You ever notice how people always say it's easier to parent boys? It's because a lot of people stop truly parenting their boys or caring about their emotional well-being by the time they're teenagers.
10000000%
@@xxxjackson1489Because fathers and even some mothers believe their sons will be alright no matter what and a lot of that has to do with pushing "traditional masculinity " out of fear.
They're so afraid of what their friends think and families think about their male children , they install these shallow and outdated ideas about masculinity into their sons regardless of how that screws up their worldview and which leads to resentment towards women when they grow up into being men and realized that women aren't obligated to take care of them or bear their children.
Never underestimate how parental pressure can mess you up....
@@xxxjackson1489That was due to sex.
As a boy of the 90s and 2000s, I can tell you that I was taught the same thing about getting a degree. It would be more accurate to say that it was drilled into my skull.
As a woman with a bachelors degree and about to start a masters degree (both in STEM fields) here is what I'll say. Getting an education is about emotional resilience. Can you get a bad grade on a test/project and go back and study harder instead of giving up? Getting an education is about working in community. Can you get your research and big capstone group projects done? Getting an education is about self-control. Can you deal with the delayed gratification of long-term goal setting? Getting an education is about humility in the face of things you know. Can you silence your ego and listen to those who know more than you? It takes more than just raw intellectual ability; it takes emotional strength.
I totally agree with you. This is a great comment. I totally understand that a lot of people go to college to get well paying jobs. However, it's also important to acknowledge that the value of higher education extends beyond the development of cognitive skills. It can also provide opportunities for personal growth, social development, and the acquisition of practical skills and knowledge that can be applied in a variety of careers and life situations.
Thank you for saying this because I’m struggling as a nursing student and two jobs and I’m working hard but seeing others who did it gives me strength that I can do it too❤
@@SierraLQuickPLEASE continue in nursing school!
My late mother was a nurse. I rarely tell people she was an LPN because of the nursing hierarchy - she was also a Charge Nurse overseeing RNs & BSNs on her job, because she was a dang good nurse. The only reason she "only" had an LPN was because she went back to school in her 40s, the divorced mother of 3, including one child in college at the time. She wasn't paying for my college, I was - we were essentially homeless, also. She lived in a one-room apartment over her friend's restaurant & shared a bathroom with several other people. I lived on campus or in temporary housing. She had to have a friend in the car business put a lien on her car title so she could get food stamps while she went to nursing school, because welfare wanted her to sell her car - then she wouldn't be able to finish nursing school! This was in the 1980s, laws are a little different now, but she struggled so hard to become a nurse.
She worked in long-term care for 19 years. Then, at 62, she was diagnosed with a terminal cancer. I was working on my PhD at the time, so I took a leave of absence from my studies to care for her. I never completed my dissertation after that and I continue to regret that, but I don't regret caring for my mom.
Being a nurse was the most rewarding thing she ever did, and that doesn't make me jealous (as the result of one of the other "things" she pursued - motherhood) at all. I was so proud of her. We need more people who know what it's like to sacrifice to go into nursing. I believe that's what made my mom such a good nurse. She got very frustrated with other nurses who took their jobs for granted, who didn't recognize the humanity in patients, or understand that we all struggle.
She died from complications from Multiple Myeloma (she developed sepsis, I suspect either from her [dialysis] tesio or groshong being accessed incorrectly or left open). The hard part is temporary. Then you get to be a nurse for the rest of your life, however long that is, and if your heart is in it, it will never be long enough.
Good luck! Remember, school is temporary suffering, but your education lasts a lifetime & no one can take that off of you.
@ thank you for sharing your and your mothers story. I am a divorced single mother of two, work two jobs and am I 4 credits shy of being a full time student because my bios expired. I’m starting over after being out of school for almost 13 years, and leaving a DV situation. It’s been tough but I want to make a great life for my children since we are struggling as well I moved back in with family and pay massive rent to help out and other personal bills but like you said my education will be forever and I’ve always dreamed of actually being a doctor and opening up a clinic but with this economy I had to change routes and I think I’ll enjoy being a nurse more because my responsibilities will be more geared towards my patients and not have to be overwhelmed by other hospital responsibilities and not have enough time to prioritized my patients.
As an educator for 16 years- Yes. All of this.
Looking back on my experience as a young woman, I realize the men who were most howling about wanting a traditional wife brought nothing to the relationship aside from fast food jobs, skid marks and an inability to find the laundry hamper...
Jobs in the trades are more in demand than those requiring degrees
You can make a good living in the trades. Especially like plumbing and as an electrician.
@@Zora87PeaceBest jobs for men to cheat
@@Zora87Peace If you are willing to do the work and also interact with clients professionally. When people hire, they also look at the contractor's attitude as much as they do the skills! But hopefully men take these jobs because they love them, not because they love money... their clients will find out which one is the truth, haha
@@Zora87PeaceYep! Ive known people that make more money in a trade than those with degrees.
Lolol not "skid marks" sis 😂😂😂🤢🤮🤮🤮
Fun fact, education used to be male dominated. Also, there is a great need for male teachers. Boys and girls need both male and female teachers/ role models.
Because they made it hard for women to study or even go to school was forbidden for a long time for women, let alone go to college, Einstein.
More broadly, I think children will benefit from having teachers who have very diverse backgrounds and identities. However, I think it's even more important that children have high-quality competent teachers and adequate school resources even if the amount of diversity ends up being less than ideal.
Yes! Some of the best teachers I had were men.
Some of my male teachers were very good at teaching, but even when I was in school not so long ago men were uncommon. When jobs become populated by around 60% women, men tend to avoid that job. Til this day, the trades and manual labor jobs have been their stronghold that they refuse to let women into at any cost unless the women are kept physically isolated at work.
@@YouKnowMeDuhMen don't like doing anything that can be pursued as feminine. They move away as soon as women enter and start dominating. This can be seen everywhere. This is why men in STEM, especially in TEM, harass women peers and colleagues to force them to quit so they can keep STEM women free. So that the thing they do is not considered feminine or emasculating.
But women will dominate and conquer every field in no time. It's just women's nature to conquer hardship and prevail🤷🏻.
Bros, if by traditional values mean keeping a tradwife and single income, you better hustle like crazy and make 3x median in the area. You make that kind of money then we talk.
Truth is most these tradwife girls make income off their influencer content. So they actually are breadwinners.
That ain't been possible since 1973 .
Exactly. But I guarantee you that is not the kind of marriage they were looking for. Those of us from the black community already know that that "traditional values" for our parents and their parents before them involved the woman working too. The idea of the traditional family structure is something that a very specific demographic had the privilege of.
Never possible in most black homes in any era
@@fred5399maybe in your circles and in your capabilities… but I live it, it is possible. Don’t make excuses. Many people are living it.
These dudes have NOTHING but excuses and I am tired of it! 🤭 🛑blaming EVERYTBODY, WM,BW, the Republicans, the Democrats....the list is endless. I am embarrassed for them... 🙄
As a senior ,college educated black man that voted for Harris, I can’t imagine how it feels for men who are entering the workforce or starting a trade at this point in their lives especially without a degree. I absolutely despise my college and definitely see it as a scam but the opportunities it can provide is what gives me hope. To be in a situation where you have very little money,Can’t get your needs met and probably have little to no friends. Though I do see them as fools I do understand why men with little to no options voted for the guy who pandered to their anger and fear
A lot of people are talking about trades which are awesome career opportunities for someone who knows what they are doing. While these trades are ultimately good, people fail to mention how they are great jobs that can help you pay for college/grad school and further your education.
1. Great credentials to have regardless.
2. Exit strategy. You can fall back on a degree but if something happens to your job/business or in your field, you can still rely on your degree. Plus you can learn a lot about the world that you won’t learn in trade school.
Tbf, some trades are awesome careers that isn’t just back breaking labor. I found out the crunch and stress of university (while working full time so I can eat) isn’t for me so I’m entering a sonography program. The medical field is always a great place to be in terms of availability and impact imo.
@ That sounds awesome! Good planning for your future is a skill they don’t teach in school. Your credits keep, so you don’t have to knock it all out. A few classes here and there is better than burning out and it’s just for a Plan B anyways. But if you got it, you got it.
@@DG-gx8pnTbf, jobs in the medical field such as sonography, are the cross roads between trade school and traditional college. A lot of work was put into those particular fields so that the hospital can function much like a factory line. Should certain machines no longer be used, you will have enough knowledge and training to flow into another field of study. You also have to learn a great deal of biology.
@@lastx2534 You hate plumbers, welders, excavators, especially rural ones.
@@kwyatt261 I respect plumbers and welders. Where do you get hate? All I’m saying is if one works their trade well, they don’t have to choose between school and a trade. You can do both and not have to do school first.
Problem is college is unaffordable for most. This is why we need tuition free public colleges.
that's not the only problem lol
so how do the girls afford it?😕
@@nooneinparticular3468 well I do believe it’s more than that but the state I’m in I not only get fasfa but I also get a grant for the state I live in and a grant for black females it has helped me get my classes paid for
@@SierraLQuick cool, as far as I've heard there are grants for all BAME, most grants aren't split by gender in any state (yet). And things like sport scholarships are still there and usually given more to male students than the female students so I just don't see the reason for the gender divide being so wide in education 🤷♀️
With the resources available seem to be the same for both genders, there's better school support in this generation than ever before and yet the boys aren't doing as well, why?
@ well the reason for the gender split is single parent hood. One for single dads and one for single moms it’s a private company/business for black individuals by black individuals. There is also a grant just for black people alone from the same company and another company for all minorities. But you have to know where to look and I was told about the grant.
I got my BA degree in 1993 and I have been a professional writer celebrating my 30th anniversary this year.
However, its a different world in 2024.
A lot of men these days want to as i say ride by stagecoach in the 21st century and they foolishly think being a man with no skills , credentials and education is no problem in the world of work and career.
They are already losing out.
New subscriber. Excellent thought provoking content.
As a single mom, with a 27 year old son, even when I was married, I was always the primary breadwinner. My son has no issues with women making money, it's what he knows. With the prevalence of working moms out here in the world, how do we understand these young men who don't see women as leaders and earners, when many of them were led and fed by women? Where is all this hateful misogyny originating? I know about all the podcasts, but I also know that without susceptibility, that rhetoric has no place to gain ground. How do we get these men back on track? Women, living independently have no reason to settle for someone who treats them badly, or worse are threatening, and have no ambition or direction in life. This election, and the aftermath, seems to indicate that there is an ever widening chasm.
Good stuff. Thanks.
women raise sons that aren't attractive to other women. You cant see it because you are biased towards seeing your own child in a positive light.
@sp123 What a weird perspective. My comment must have really bothered you. Nearly every man who's ever lived was raised by a woman, whether there was a man around or not. You're not even correct about my kid, and that's not some "blindness" on my part. I've met most of the girls he's dated/lived with, except the ones he dated in college.
That's just some made up junk to put down women.
Sorry, but if women are the breadwinners then men should do housework. Most women ending up doing everything for these men. That's what these men have Problem wirh, with doing "female work". Most of them would love a woman providing for them, but also they want to lead and not do the housework, this is where problems accure.
@@sp123 true
It is concerning for sure. Some of what I have heard recently is this fear of men being replaced. As women, we find a huge sense of relief that we aren't in danger when we have the means to live on our own. But I can see how from men, us talking about being independent can make them feel completely alone. They don't know how deep the resentment in women goes, how sick and tired we are of nobody believing we can do cool things.
Moms need to ensure they inspire their kids to lead **alongside** women. Us working together will produce the best results.
Really well said. I'm female and was taught by my mom to go to school. Because if I do someday get married, I need that as a backup plan. Now granted, this applies if your husband suddenly passes away, but uh... you probably already know what scenario we were thinking of. Women will do whatever it takes to escape. We also think with the long-term in mind, that mobility that a college degree gives. I am very happy to hear all the stories of people making more money than me. But the thing is, you really might have to start all over if you switch industries. A degree really prevents you from getting locked into the one profession you've been trained for. This is why I hear of a lot of people who once dismissed school going back after 5 years of trade. And believe me, those people finish. By then, they're adults who can make that commitment.
You’re a woman
Statistics show that some of these young men, refuse to even attend trade school or technical college.
What do they want to do then? Can't just stay and do nothing?? I hope they atleast have hobbies that doesn't include bashing women and minorities.
@@Segen_Bellthey want to live off women.
Oh, so those of them that have mothers willing to put up with their shenanigans just live at home for the rest of their lives and the rest will just end up. Hell, anywhere.
I appreciate this analysis, I am also worried for the young boys and the future, I've been crying out to anyone who will listen about how we raise girls to take care of the boys that we neglect
I'm not sure where this idea comes from. Could you explain? Because on my end I see boys and men being abandoned due to hardheadedness. People get tired if talking to brick walls.
@@ladybluelotusno one talks about how the “sons” goes against the grain most of the time.
@@ladybluelotus Its about Change as a whole society... having empathy for one nother therefore understanding of one another and therefore u can handle upon it
@@ladybluelotusThank you! All of the boys in my family were given cars, our moms helped them even write papers to get scholarships, worked 2hobs to afford their athletic equipment etc, while they were disrespectful and ungrateful. The girls were left on our own, working by 15 and saving our money. Well guess what, most of the men dropped out of college, or either didn’t go at all despite the resources that were available bc some of them could’ve went to college under their dads GI Bill. They have too many kids that our grandparents are helping to support, still hustling at 35 or working job that can not sustain the amount of children they have and sadly some are in prison bc of their choices. 😢 We can’t keep blaming the system. These are the choices that they are making on top of constantly being enabled.
Men neglect their own sons. Sons often do not appreciate their mothers influence unless it is cruelly beaten into them. And I am not joking. There reaches a point where if you lack a very firm hand when they reach a certain age they literally lose respect for you and everything you stand for even if it's good and righteous because nothing you can ever be will ever amount to their internal idea of the strength and power of a man.
This is not a problem women can solve by doing anything other than refusing to have sons or refusing to be with men for as long as men think that being an absentee parent is ok. Women cannot be role models for men. A line must be drawn somewhere, and oftentime it is drawn by the sons, not the mothers. Once puberty hits, their heads just go elsewhere.
i think about a couple things form this: first, young men get lower grades than young women and lower test scores, this has always been the case and it creates an innate tendency that as secondary education hold higher standards for acceptance, Women will get accepted into higher education at higher rates than Men. Even if there are still simpler forms of higher education for underachieving people to go to, the lack of variety in options compared to the cost factor is going to be more discouraging towards Men statistically. The second thing, is that the non-higher education options for economic participation are very poor quality, skill trade options even with training or just plain labor options are very hard, time consuming, low paying, dangerous, and most of all competitive and anti-social/anti community. The capitalist industrial methods of production, remove the options for Artisanal practice and commodify them into skill trade submission to employers. Most consumer items that would fall into artisanal categories, have no need to be produced industrially but are monopolized by capitalists and that opportunity is robbed from its natural place in the individual and community market. A ceramic bowl has not innovated or changed in thousands of years, its consumer demands have not changed either, but we allow capital industrialists to have that market when it can be produced by individual artisans just as functionally and cost effectively compared to usage. Artisanship is a profoundly fulfilling occupation, but skill trade industrial work is just disparaging laborious work.
Something else to offer is when times are hard a college educated couple can move across the country and follow the jobs. We moved with our kids and pets. We purchased homes on one income so if one was without a job for a short time, the unit did not suffer. Mind you, our degrees were door openings so they allowed us multiple types of industries to seek employment.
Trade certificates would allow people to do the same! Too many people don’t want to leave their area even for a few years to take a job that gives them experience. This too limits. Keep all options open.
My mind keeps coming back to “what do you bring to the table?” Is it a life of struggle? Before getting a degree, I struggled on my own. Unless, you have as much hustle as I do to better our life (earning potential) Yeah, nope. Be a partner.
Spoken so eloquently! I'm noticing that many political pundits want to talk around this issue and focus on aspects they can control. And since no one can change gender/race/cultural preferences in candidates, there seems to be a reluctance to admit the majority of Americans aren't ready for a woman president.
Traditional values to control her and have the best. Modern values when it comes to taking responsibilities.
Men only want 50/50 went it suits them. 90/10 when it doesn't.
This video needs to go VIRAL yesterday
Like I always say, tradition costs money.
They want you to not know any better while they're mediocre. Crying about them providing while actually offering very little.
I think one of the sadder parts for men who are falling into this camp too is it'll be a self fulling prophecy if they get it. They want a trad wife that relies on them which can work but also leads to a unbalanced power dynamic in the relationship which can lead to resentment, infidelity, etc. These same men say all women care about is money and you can't trust them. Well if you put women in a position where they are dependent on men then yes there will probably be more relationships based around monetary worth and less faithfulness. It's a recipe for less fulfilling relationships.
Just got a new subscriber, gotta prop up educated black men 🙏🏽
Refusing to educate oneself means that you are refusing an opportunity to show that you can accept information in a structured manner, process it efficiently, and apply it correctly.
As much as you can worry about these young men, you also have to admit that these men are adults and they have to make choices for themselves. Actions either have benefits or consequences. They can't get upset at anyone but themselves if they refuse to wholeheartedly analyze the consequences. The real point of concern is whether those who suffer will recognize the root of their issues and make better choices or if they will just keep on with whatever they're doing hoping for someone to give them an easy break. Failure happens. How we respond when failure occurs draws a definitive line in the sand; there are only two types of people.
For the people obsessed with trades, you still needs some form or education, business principles and/or higher learning. You body will not be able to sustain you through that trade job. I’m seeing this with a lot on men in my family and even men that I’ve dated. They’re worn out by 45, barely hanging on by 50, can’t take a day off work or even think about getting sick bc many don’t have PTO which is something we take for granted.
I won't lie to you, I feel kind of trapped between these two ideas. I had parents that made sure I planned to go to college, that I did well in primary and secondary school. I think there should be a conversation around the ways in which I feel like it did not really serve me well as a boy, especially a black boy. Even at the time, the parallels between prison and school were increasingly evident to me. I felt like I was to either be put on a pedestal as a model of behavior and excellence, and that standard was my life regardless of what I actually wanted, or I could have been cast aside as lesser and deserving of a lower status not just in school but in life.
At the same time, College has largely been great until I don't have the support I need to do well. It's not affordable, and it's not built for people who also work, at least in the circumstances I've been in so I'm 30 and I still haven't finished. I owe a lot of money, but I can't get any loans. I can't afford to be there, but the more I work the less time I have to devote to the schoolwork itself. It's got me in a miserable place that is almost worse than when I had left college in 2015. I didn't like that I wasn't regarded with respect or dignity by other people, that effect is also real even though I run a business. I'm self employed. I do work I take pride in and enjoy.
So, to sum it up: I have no issue with women having done so well. That was not an issue for me in voting for Kamala. I just feel like I should be deserving of love, of dignity, of respect even though I don't have this degree and yet clearly I do so need it and at the same time, the path to it is marred with chicanery if you don't come from priveledge. I'm watching myself slip through the cracks in the system. I reject the notion of traditional values in general, education or no, but that also hasn't meant that seeking an education has served me well in my own life.
But I would also add this to talking about people who came out for Biden but did not for Harris. I think there's a backlash effect in the conversation around student debt forgiveness. I still voted for Kamala, like I said, but a huge motivating factor for me voting for Joe was that he promised us, me, $10,000 in student debt relief. That would have made a world of difference for me in my life and I am actually still somewhat resentful that that did not happen. Maybe it did for some other folks, folks who've been paying for decades, folks who are public sector. I get that. I support that. I'm happy for them, but I can't pretend this wasn't a broken promise not just from Biden but from Democrats at large. I think there's a degree to which people are holding Kamala accountable for the sins of party.
Your goal should have been looking for degrees that will allow you to live outside the US. You will never find the "love, dignity, and respect," you are looking for in America.
Who is not giving you respect & dignity because of your incomplete degree? These are internal. As someone with a similar experience working in higher education college access; that (insecurity) went away when my performance outdid my degreed counterparts. I was sure working in a selective environment meant EVERYONE was smarter, better, more skilled. No. My dignity is internally validated by the quality of my work. Now a degree would elevate but it doesn’t break. The respect is something you can give yourself then demand from others. The few people in your life who probably don’t even have one, that you feel are judging you don’t care half as much as your insecurities do. This is projection, because I doubt people are thinking this much about your degree. Give yourself respect, dignity and honor for your skills, as you show up others will reciprocate this energy.
Hey look. If you can hire someone to manage your business for long enough that you only need to come in 2-3 days of operation- do that. Apply for grants. Not loans. Stack some money on the side for a year to buffer yourself. If you have family that can help you with anything and they are willing, ask them.
Dont just up and give up on college became it looks bleak. I'm speaking from a JC student's perspective, but there are 1001 opportunities sitting there in their financial aids offices that if you just ask, you might just stumble upon something worth while.
You gotta get out of YOUR funk man. You're 30. There's opportunities everywhere if you have an open mind to look for it. My JC will _pay_ you just to go to school if you qualify. FAFSA will provide you grants. If you really wanted to go to school, nothing would stop you. Get out your head and make a plan to get it done.
This is the story of a lot of folks who may not have the ability to put it into words without fear of being seen as a failure or making excuses. As someone who graduated form a prestigious school known for its STEM programs, the college game is very much about a network. If you just come into it, it is hard.
My brother thanked me recently. He said if it wasn’t for my finishing school and my career in tech, none of the rest of them would have been able to graduate. (He had a really weird period of alpha male podcaster cult so I cut him off for a while). He told everyone that it was I who I found them support systems, study aides, and provided financial assistance. He said some of his friends did not even know HOW to ask for help. Some did not even know where in the process they were failing some they just dropped out. My working class parents just did not have access to all of that.
Bottom line, it's gonna take two salaries to make it in this economy! Also, marriages are supposed to be "loving partnerships!" We're supposed to have one bank account that the money goes into and both converse about how the money is to be spent. These guys looking to "lead" women are going to be single because of that way of thinking. And outside of highschool, adults will need additional education to give themselves an edge in the employment pool. REMOVE ALL THE CRAZY TALKING POINTS FROM YOUR HEAD! You've got to be appropriate to attract someone of like mind!
Unless you want to be left out of society likeba hermit.
All I needed was the title bro! I died! Nicely done.
spot on
In many cases there is also pressure for young men to enter the workplace earlier to contribute to the family
Interesting my Grandfather got his teaching job because he severed in Korea. The thinking was the the students wouldn't set out of line knowing their teacher had just fought in a war.
So, he used the GI Bill?
My father told me when I was 8 years old, "Son, if you don't go to school and get a degree. You will still be black"
i keep coming back to this and it’s just so true😭
I think there is something wrong with our current system that requires a four year degree and internship to get entry level jobs. It’s wild to know what stands in the way of me living a life with my head above water is solely due to a degree that in reality does not show my competence at all. To say that I am good at my career in spite of my time in college would be an understatement. The choice of getting into the middle class being do you want to go in debt and hopefully graduate in four years and then hopefully make enough money or be so academically gifted that people will pay for you to go just sucks to me. Idk a single person in college that has a positive attitude about their actual education unless it’s in a hard science or math related subject. America needs to do more to combat the price of college- well not like that’s gonna happen now
Yep, doctors and engineers shouldn't have a uni education. Who cares about safe medical treatments and safe buildings.
@ yes that is what I believe they shouldn’t…. Is this the answer you were looking for? Could I have been more specific about what education should require, yes. I’m not talking about that though. I’m talking about the fact that if you want to make even 20 dollars an hour for a job you need to have a degree. The state of my education is pathetic and embarrassing to anyone who has experience in my field.
Your crushing it!!
If you don't go for a university degree you better have a plan in place to get to where you wanna be that holds to scrutiny.
I'm not one to say that a degree is necessary, it would be hypocritical on my part.
I personally didn't get one although I was at my last semester before I dropped out.
I consider myself lucky though, and learned what I needed to get there.
If you don't have a plan get a degree at the very least while exploring what interests you.
@KolyaGerasimov-USA It was in my plans but I have been getting constant significant promotions every year which has delayed me from finising. It is in my benefit that I am Canadian though so tuition was much cheaper.
I do kind of like the aspect that looking back, my time in university was more for the knowledge than for the degree.
Truth!
It's not cost when it comes to college or education they are simply choosing not to
they don't have any interest in any type of education they actively resist it especially conservative men who feel that education is synonymous with the elite so they turn it away
But because I don't have the education to understand certain things that are going on in society they can't comprehend that with an education they cannot get a higher paying job without some type of education of some sort and there aren't a lot of labor type of jobs like factories unless they want to go be a farmer which they won't because those are low wages that immigrants are doing so even if they all get deported though those wages aren't going to really come up like that it's still going to be minimum wage which for citizen is not enough to live off of and they can't get what they all want to achieve which is what's making them so angry and intolerable when it comes to being around these people interacting with them or even holding a conversation with him even if it's not an intellectual conversation you just can't hold conversations with them because they are so disagreeable and they are so unable to hold a simple conversation cuz they are so angry and want to blame somebody for something because they can't comprehend that because they refuse to be a productive memory of society in a way that makes them enough income to survive and take care of themselves they are not going to be a value to anyone else to be taken seriously enough to get the patriarchy respect that normally they would get automatically but that's not the case anymore women have more respect for themselves they demand more respect from everyone they have buying power and they have their own freedom so they don't have to be around anyone who is not worth their time and men who can't even take care of themselves and pay their own bills can't go around expecting people to want to be thrilled to hang out with someone who doesn't have their s*** together and it's causing this disconnect because they continue to expect that women will want to interact with him and will not is not the case they take it out on everyone around them which doesn't help either so they don't have an education to be able to comprehend the simple thing that this is what capitalism is and if you choose not to participate you don't get to have any of the benefits that capitalism affords men under the patriarchy and until they learn that they're going to drive a lot of people away from them because they are insufferable to be around demanding respect and and all these things within have nothing else to offer other people Don't be mad no one is seeking you out or wants to put up with you this is why they have to find someone to blame cuz they can't comprehend why they aren't entitled to something so they become racist or they become sexist or they become misogynistic or they become xenophobic whatever it is to blame somebody else to explain why they can't get something in life it has to be someone else's fault because someone else took that opportunity for me someone else is benefiting why I'm being punished they don't believe that it could be something that they are actually doing to cause their problems or they refuse to acknowledge information facts logic education that would help them understand why the system is like this and why they are having so much issues with it and how they can fix these problems we didn't build capitalism we didn't build the patriarchy and we didn't build the society where we have to work to get the things that we need or be homeless
1:37 they are actively disengaging from the things that are statistically shown to make their lives better/easier
hmmmm
This is also why countries like China and India are catching up, as there's little gap between "masculinity" and education. Its a recent step that women are encouraged into the workforce as much as men, so its not necessarily more progressive - but a man with an education is a man with status, and that intertwines with their masculinity. The message right wing media is sending to men in the West, is that we've lost our connection to being physically strong, so that's why your mental health is in decline. Since that's not how anyone can make money for about 50 years or so, then we'll run into the problem you described in this video.
This is an important clip. I probably got maybe/almost two decades on marquis. Yes I have a traditional family. My wife stays home...i had 3 kids in rapid succession planning on one more. But i stated that late. Did my wife have a career? Yes. Did she want to be a mom? Yes. Was the conversation about her stop working take five minutes? Yes? I am a toxic male damnit. As in I did the things to be the leader of my household. I already preplanned whomever i married to not work...as in her income didn't matter to me. I also choose a wife that can go in "command" mode when needed. Hell, i am trying to convince her to start a business with her skills. My family is a team...we think in family unit terms not this toxic individualism crap. My wife recently said to me "you do let me rest in my femininity" at random. That's the goal boys. You have to do the things to earn the position and letting her rest is a KPI. Is college a path for that? maybe? A business works just as good...business works better.
The role of action movies & other media aimed at boys also needs to be considered as to be negativity impacting young males such as video games were they murder women.
amazing video!
Well put
I wanted this to be separate. I do see people here talk about the trades. They can be great fields to work in, if you are where the work is and if you don't mind sacrificing your body for it.
What about blue collar jobs like trucking, HVAC, plumbing, electrical, carpentry etc? These jobs pay very well with no degree.
Unfortunately, they typically don't unless you're part of a union in the state you're employed in. Non-union HVAC technicians, plumbers, electricians, and carpenters make significantly less than their unionized counterparts. There's a lot more unlicensed non-union workers engaging in these fields compared to the people who are licensed and unionized.
They pay well for not having a degree and low barrier to entry. My wife has a friend and girl makes 200k to 350k as a lawyer. She doesn't talk to black men who can't hold a conversation at the same level so she is often single. Women make up a ton of law and medicine and shortly engineering.
Nothing beats education in terms of opportunities. Sure a guy can get far in carpentry but they aren't making 200k plus unless they own a business. But compare that to law firms where 500k is chump change or software where 10-50 million buyout a simply all decent windfall.
In my white suburban area, nobody is telling their kids to do blue collar work unless they believe they can't make it to college. College is just better.
Those jobs can be too physically demanding. I remember one carpenter that teachs here in youtube that said that he started with a carpentry youtube channel and other business because his knee and back couldn't continue with normal construction.
So, even if everything goes well, they will need lower healthcare costs to keep working.
@@AlgorithmOfTruth no, they still do. I know a lot of guys making 60-80 an hour as non-union electricians. I know a lot of people with a degree not doing that
@miatomi That's anecdotal. Of course there are exceptions to that, such as your example, but that's not the case overall throughout the US. Last year, non-union tradesmen earned 86% (14% disparity) of what their unionized counterparts did. Source: www.bls.gov/news.release/union2.nr0.htm
He/him. Thanks for clarifying.
Honestly what discouraged me from going past my bachelors was getting to freely interact with social science PhDs on Twitter and realizing that I wasn’t going to grow as a person inside the classroom. I do plan on going back when it can supplement my skills though.
No you don't need a college education. There are blue college jobs that pay 80k to 100k. You are a snob toward non college men . Me and a lot of black men who never when to college and raised families making 100k a year. Today men can make money in the right position. What about men who go to college and come out college and cannot make enough money to live by themselves. You should know and learn about blue collar jobs that need workers bad. Plumbers, power plant operators, welders, electrical workers, paper mill workers, steel plants, auto workers, etc.
Just because you have a college degree don't make you an expert on life. Many are these blue college workers are married and raising kids. I see them every day. Until you are married and git kids and doing goid decent day to day work how can you label aoo young men the same.
how is he being a snob?
@@BeautifulEarthJa I think something to keep in mind is that getting an education is unobtainable for many people. It's really expensive and you're not guaranteed a job when you graduate. It can feel like a game of needing to know the right people and just earning a piece of paper. It's like a pay to play system. I do think that getting an education is power, whatever form that comes in, even if you teach yourself things by going to the library on your own and reading, it's really beneficial. But I can understand how paying for an education can be a turn off for people as well.
The data does not lie. Statistically, as education levels increase so does the income.
Trades are also considered education y'all! You're gonna need something else beyond highschool to give yourself an edge.
👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
Likes and clicks
It’s a skill issue 😂😂😂
Great commentary
Bruthas for Vance 2028💪🏽
It should always be about finding a mate. No matter the scenario job or education your main focus should be finding a lady who you want to have kids with. That's the number 1 important thing and I will not change my mind on this.
I agree two is better than 1 and when they don't give you the promotion your family is still their.
Let’s get some public works projects going!
As I recall, Eddie Murphy did a fantastic standup act on this issue. ua-cam.com/video/epRAmfM0tts/v-deo.htmlsi=VDoQukDGBD_aJmZU