Everyone’s journey is their journey, and there really is no right or wrong. If you’re doing something that makes you feel better, I would say keep doing it..But therapy also costs money and time, and the only person that knows where to allocate those things is you.
I think that is a problem in therapy... theres way too many variables there's no pay off. There's no guarantee a plan is going to work. I'm willing to work hard but I NEED to know if it's going to work and what the payoff is before hand. Is that so hard to ask out of you therapists
I had seven years of therapy and towards the end my therapist was trying to wean me off. I just wanted to make sure I had done everything possible to make sure I had control of my anger issues (I had). She taught me well, as if I was a young paduan learning.
Mine ended when I realized I couldn't be honest with my therapist anymore due to the fear of involuntary committal to a hospital. Start therapy before your issues cause more issues, people.
My moms making me go to therapy but that’s why I’m scared. I know, before I’ve even got help, that I can’t be honest abt my feelings bc of what they will try and do so I’m very anxious to start this stuff and I’m really dreading it since I know that I can’t ever get the *FULL* help I need 🤷🏻♀️
@@bailey-qf9hw It is always useful to talk to your therapist about what to expect. I don't know what the rules are where you live, but I think it's true generally that therapists can't disclose anything you say to them, even to your parents, unless you pose a threat to someone's safety. This could vary based on age, don't take anything I say for granted because I don't know your full situation. I think it is generally true that you don't need all your problems solved by your therapist, they just need to help get you into a mental place where you can rely on your loved ones, the people that care about you to slowly decrease the effects of your illness on your life. My case is not the average, I had noone to fall back on, noone that would want to help, so I was doomed to fail.
@@zsfekete5211 in my case they would be obligated to tell my mom and go further since it would be a danger to myself so I’m scared to be honest abt that part so I’m going to try and just get help for the rest and see if some of those coping mechanisms help get rid of that bigger feeling and obviously if it doesn’t help then I will let them take further steps but that’s going to be my last resort if that makes sense 🤷🏻♀️😅
@@bailey-qf9hw I would say don’t worry but I believe your emotions shouldn’t be repressed. Your therapist is there to help you open up and as long as you work hard, you will be fine. I totally understand being scared for your first session. I was too. It is scarry and there’s nothing wrong with that
It's crucial to address directly. The goal of therapy becomes moot if the process is half-a$$ed. The therapist would be glad that you took the initiative to look for someone better
Therapy is a professional relationship that ends when it has worked, when it has achieved what it set out to do. All good therapists should be working towards it ending :)
the timing!! I just had a talk with my psychologist about the possibility of therapy ending in a couple of months, which sounds scary but also good because progress!!
Yep that was the way for me twice. I hate the fights with my insurance (not only about this issue). And once someone suddenly moved that was even worse. Especially because I never trusted anyone as much as her. I think if you need treatment, you should get it for free and for as long as you need... but as we know life's not fair 😏
@@Katimorton My therapist died whilst I was seeing her (not actually while I was in session, in between sessions). Obviously this was an awful tragedy primarily for her and her family and friends, but I never expected to have to deal with that on top of my own difficulties.
@@Katimorton I'm looking forward to that. Recently I had something similar to the last one, but after going to that person for about 10 years. I confronted her on some of her bad behaviours (like some homophobic remarks) and she decieded to end our therapy abruptly. I still don't know how to cope with everything that it entailed.
You forgot about when therapy comes to an abrupt ending without warning because your therapist gives up on you. Happened to me last month and it has sent me into a spiraling down fall I can't slow down, much less get out of.
Your therapist was right in the fact that she could not help you. With the way she handled it, I can that it’s not your fault. Some therapists are not very good at their job. Like yes, it is not the therapists responsibility to make you better but that doesn’t mean a therapist can’t do their job poorly.
My insurance says I've had enough therapy and my therapist says that's the rules and I need to think about stopping or looking for someone else (again). I get 15 sessions to deal with that but I can't. Especially after my Somatic Experiencing Practitioner (trauma therapy and chronic pain) suddenly left last year. Why don't they take into consideration all the shit that happened to me the last couple of years additionally to the childhood trauma? It's just not fair. I didn't choose this. I lost my whole life due to a physical illness and I've been homebound for 5 years. When the Covid lockdown will be over, I will still be stuck at home. I just want to be healthy physically and mentally.
I’m so sorry. Chronic illness sucks and I empathize with the last statement that once COVID is over, essentially your life stays the same. Is there a way to get support from neighbors, family and friends to help you around the house and for emotional release of stress and venting?
Hi Kati! I dont feel like my therapist and I are a good fit, and I really think its more stressful seeing her rather than helpful. I would go and see another therapist, but here’s the problem: There is only one therapist in my area! If I want to change therapists, I’m going to have to drive for 1 and 1/2 hour to get there! I don’t have time for that when I’ve got work every day! I’m just saying this to let everyone know that finding a therapist that fits for you isn’t always as easy. I live in the north of Norway (yes, I’m Julia who sent in the voice memo to otdm haha) and the distances between things up here are faaar! Anyway, thanks for your great content!❤️
This was great. At first I didn't understand what was going on, and I was like, wait is everything okay, Kati? And then it was like, oh no, Kati is the therapist and the client.
My therapist is leaving. That's one other reason why it's ending. Scary though to see a new therapist or try to find the right fit as you explained. Great video. I need to see this. ❣️
If just more therapist wouldn't take it personal when they aren't the best fit. Many start interpreting that this would just show my problems I have to work on with them....
I am finding your videos a big help, following a year with redundancy and marriage separation I have never been so emotional and find watching you very calming
this is a really helpful video especially since it shows how to have these conversations... i unfortunately had a bad end with my therapist due to her not being able to care for my needs and me not being able to communicate them. i was really mad at her for a long time but this video showed me how to talk about these things and now im considering to write her again to clear things up... so thanks for that
I love your videos. I can't imagine a time when I'll never need therapy (I'm 17 years and counting). It's such an important resource for me (in addition to books, UA-cam, etc). Stay safe and best wishes from Australia 🤗
This is a very good explanation. I am ending mine. It has been 15 years. What I need is to have painful memories ERASED. No amount of therapy, EMDR, expensive medications, meditation, walks, etc will not help. I have given a wholehearted effort and I am done.
Really well put together. Thanks. I wish there were more therapists like you out there. Edit: that wasn’t intended to sound quite so negative. I am extremely fortunate that I had a truly gifted loving therapist for many many years. That’s unfortunately not everyone’s experience and I am actually speaking for them. 🌹
It does I'm sure. In my experience as a kid they gave me meds to keep me happy but never addressed much of it. As an adult who now has to spend the money and bring up REALLY old memories I resent that. It would have been better for me to face this (in a safe manner) as a kid in grade school then a dysfunctional adult. Its never fun but do it and get it over with so you can move on is my advice. Plus stress takes years off your life. Though we think its buried it really isn't. I found this out and now am trying to back track and spending my money instead of being covered by my parents
Thank you Kati, I was in therapy for quite awhile, but was starting to think that things would be OK if we stopped. However there was also a fear of stopping after so long. At the final session, my therapist said it was time and I knew she was right. I had the tools to cope. And I do!!! All the best to everyone going through this. Liked the holding the pillow thing too
Same experience here. I left therapy yesterday. I haven’t even come close to fixing all of my mental issues but I have learned the skills to fix it on my own. Now I am always happy even when I’m sad.
So often I watch a new video of kati s do with therapy or subject of depression or anxiety and can completely relate to things kati talks about she can read minds and calms with her voice looking forward to Thursdays AKA
this feels so disconnected to my experiences with counselling in the uk, the counselling itself was great and benefited me loads but there's like a 6 month minimum waiting list to start your sessions here and if you stop you cant get back on that waiting list for another 6 months so its basically a year till you can get counselling again and there's like a max number of sessions so for me counselling ended when i left the college and then the uni that provided me the service or later when we just ran out of sessions and i just couldn't motivate myself to get back into it with a new person after that :/ like everyone i met did their best to help and many did help a lot but with the weird regulations and lack of nhs funding the service you talk about here is just a dream for us :/ it may be different for rich folks who can afford private services idk :/
Very nice video. :) I myself had to go through this process a few times and I'm so glad it was always a positive experience for me even though it was very tough and scary.
That's one nice thing about finding a shrink that young. You have a long time to work through things before they retire typically. Nothing worse than spilling your guts to a shrink you trust and breaking through right as they retire. Back to trying to now trust the new one.
Kati, so I have been going to same therapist for about 15 + years and I feel the I need to move on because I know that We don't have boundaries like you talk about because everything about her and I have always wanted her to be my best friend, and you opened my eyes alot but I think that I do Stop going to her that I would need to mourn her.
Had a similar experience and although totally healthy and necessary to end the relationship, I grieved loosing that relationship for over a year. Hang in there and if your gut is telling you it’s no longer an ethical relationship and has become a dual relationship, have the courage to end it and allow another therapist to help you grieve that loss. Mine new therapist was amazing at helping me process through my grief and understand healthy boundaries again between a client and therapist.
My first therapist was definitely not a good fit, but like this scenario, I was really uncomfortable bringing it up. Thankfully, she recognized that we weren't a good fit and ended our sessions for me. The DBT therapist and group I found subsequently are really working well for me now.
What a timing! I had my last session today, just before seeing the video was posted. It was a bit scary and sad, because I haven't seen my therapist in person since March 2020. There were tears. But it was also rewarding to go over all we have done together and it was a relief to hear that the doors are open for me to go back if needed. Thank you Kati and Kinions. I wouldn't have started therapy if it wasn't for you. And now I feel your support for ending it too. Thank you so much for everything.
Thank you I think I may have to end therapy. I've been with my therapist for two years and last week my therapist kept steering me away from what I wanted to discuss. I messaged her about it and she said that I find it difficult and that she finds it difficult to listen to. I think it's time to call it a day.
Some therapists are just not very good at their job. A therapist being a bad fit for someone should always come from the therapist not being a good fit for the client. If the client is not a good fit for the therapist then the therapist is not a very skilled therapist
I have issues with my therapist right now. This is my first time going to therapy and I've decided to take this step in order to improve myself, my emotions and social interactions with people. After 8 seasions I've started to feel like that it was not going anywhere, I had more questions and unresolves issues than before! Then she even told me that she doesn't think that I need therapy and I felt so much anger afterwards. As if I was talking for nothing and my issues were not taken seriously. I wrote her what I was feeling afterwards and that I didn't think that it's a good fit. She still wants at least one last session to talk about my MMPI test but I feel so off-put right now that I don't even want to talk to her a last time. I don't think I will be doing anymore therapy ever.
I think my therapist can't wait for me to leave. I sometimes just want to cancel my next appointment and never see her again coz I get the idea she doesn't know what to do with me😢
I’m so shocked some therapists message, text, or communicate with their clients outside of therapy and help when [we] are going through it. I messaged mine something I can’t seem to talk about but really want to, last week after our session and she never replied. It makes me feel like I’m being overlooked and like I’m a burden. Now I know when I see her I’ll find it even harder to open for help. I know I need more help .. maybe it’s time I ask for someone else.
This video was a journey for me. I spent most of it trying to figure out why I have been binge watching KallMeKris on TikTok and loving every second of it, yet was so excruciatingly uncomfortable during this. And then there was that last scenario and it clicked: none of them resonated with me. The first two are something I can't even imagine myself experiencing. It's like watching someone pet a unicorn! Then the third scenario I've been through and the last one...I didn't realize you could grieve for someone who has never been in your life. Which makes sense. We're all grieving the things we could be doing during the pandemic, or the future we had planned for ourselves.
I had my last session with my therapist last week. I knew I was going to be moving soon (although at that point in time, it wasn't too clear yet), so I wanted to wrap things up neatly instead of suddenly disappearing when I needed to go. It was sad to leave but I've gotten so much better in the last 7 months that it also felt right. She made it very clear that I could come back whenever I was back home, and even offered to do online sessions until I found support in my new town.
Dear Kati, I had my last session with my first therapist yesterday, majorly because she is shifting the platform we used for therapy(and my institute provides service free from that particular platform ) Even though our sessions were going towards twice a month, I still wished it could have been a bit slower, she did inform me a month in advance and your videos on the topic helped too but it was still sad to feel through that transition, I am feeling better and hopeful for my next journey with another counsellor, but I am really glad for your work! thank you!
I ended my therapy today because I am sick with this completely useless and annoying process. I have had no progress and honestly continue suffering. But the therapy actually didn't change a thing in my situation and I don't want to waste my money on something that doesn't help.
When I came out to tell my former therapist I needed more tools for healing my complex trauma because I didn’t get them after 3 years of working with him, he became defensive, and reactive, and began to tell me things didn’t work because of my issues, I asked which issues, and he said to me I had a disorder… I was so confused, that I asked him: what disorder, what are you talking about? And he said yes, your disorder, you have BPD… it was horrible. I wasn't even planning to leave him, but wanted to let him know I was going to look for more help with trauma experts… After this, I visited a psychiatrist about that BPD diagnosis, and no, I don’t have BPD. I didn’t know my therapist was that bad until that happened… I’d love all therapists to react like the one in this video!
Thanks for this video. Been with my therapist for almost a year and have hit a plateau. Havent made the progress that I wanted and have come to the realization that we are not a good fit. I believe my therapist has come to the same conclusion long before now and looking back, since we are doing video sessions and my therapist will run errands in the middle of the session ( signal will go out mid speech ) and my therapist will also not follow up on certain sentiments that I have expressed. Everybody is not for everybody so I may restart in the future but I should have trusted my instincts sooner.
I feel like I'm in the last, but not so much. I am truly connected with mine, but things aren't improving for too long and after a few days I feel the same. Things aren't worsening but neither improving, I don't want to drop off, but I still want to see something else that helps me get out of this stumbling block. What should I do in that situation?
First of all I think it is good that you are truly connected with your therapist and that things arent going downhill. That's is a big step, I would say. Now, you want things to improve, and that's always the next step, and often the goal. So I think that you should tell that to your therapist. Tell him/her that things are not worsening, but neither improving and say that you would like to do some different things so you can improve. The therapist will most currently understand that, and find new ways for you to improve. :)
was in the exact same situation 3 months ago. i couldn't be honest and my therapist made things worse. i always feel worse after opening up. after i stopped i was happier for a bit but then my mental health started deteriorating:/ (i struggle with family issues, disordered eating and sometimes depression) tbh i think the best solution would be meds but i'm too scared
What about when they say you need a higher level of care and abruptly refuse to ever see you again, tell you they’ll email some references and if you ever need help again find someone else. Coming from the only person who has been kind and compassionate and you’ve felt close to, this one is like knife to the heart.
I would interpret that as them seeing that what they are trying isn't working and to save both time and energy of both you they say try someone else who might help.
I started therapy and I feel like I am misunderstood by the therapist. I feel like she takes everything at face value without asking enough questions to see the real motivation. When I feel misunderstood, I seem to go down that route too and portray myself as if it is true even though I know it is not exactly the full story. I often feel like the full story takes longer to express and that is is hard to remember all the details. I tend to forget the main points of matters. I just know that I haven't said the full story behind something. Usually, I'm just pretending for the conversation to be over since it makes me uncomfortable and I have in my mind that she doesn't know what she's doing when she doesn't ask enough questions. I'm only pretending that she's doing a good job so that she can feel good about herself and I don't feel helpless.
Therapists can often make mistakes. The best therapists will make sure that you guys are on the same page. If the therapist is not an expert than it’s your job to tell your therapist that they got it wrong. Therapists, no matter how good they are, can’t know what you’re thinking.
After 3 years of therapy I just fibbed my way out of it because it was a waste of everyone’s time (including mine) as I was as non-compliant you could ever get (my excuse? I was a little shit kid). After a while I actually managed to heal myself from my PTSD and as of right now I don’t have any symptoms and I’m as happy as a clam! Stopping therapy actually kind of saved my life (made me be proactive and save my own damn self)
My former therapist thought I was going to end my life and called the police who showed up and checked on me. I wasn't actually suicidal so they left after about 20 minutes. My therapist rang me the morning after and told me that him having to call the police means I don't trust him any more (which wasn't true) therfore he's ending therapy with me. He left me upset and confused, and to this day I feel betrayed and abandoned by him.
Wait, your therapist said that because he 'had to' call the police it meant that you didn't trust him anymore? Why was his decision to call the police in any way your responsibility? It was his choice. I hope you found a better therapist, one who knows what his/her boundaries and responsibilities entail. Good luck :)
I recently had a similar conversation with my therapist about having less frequent visits because of my progress. It felt awkward and I thought I would combust. It ended up going really well and they were understanding.
I would get to a point with a therapist where I either had nothing left to talk about it they weren't helping, but it felt strangely difficult to stop. Like they wouldn't let me go. I had one therapist call me back for a session after I'd stopped, and when I went in, she asked what I had wanted to talk about. It was very strange because I hadn't reached out first. It's also hard to get out of therapy that you don't need when there's a narcissistic mother in the picture forcing you to one therapist after another (you know, to fix you). I've had some very good therapists in my life and I think they can be very helpful, but I've also had some that seem more interested in the money and forcing you to relive old traumas that you've already worked through.
I have to tell my therapist that I don't think it's a good fit and I'm honestly panicking. I canceled our next session because I just...I don't want to talk to her anymore. This definitely gave me something to think about.
I just canceled my appointment with mine. She keeps calling me and telling me if I don’t see her, she has to close my case. Ok. I don’t care if she doesn’t like it.
You could lie and say its do to money issues. Say thanks but I need to watch my budget. And leave it at that. They won't think your manic or that you hate them. In the USA money is a valid reason for stopping it I bet
Thank you so much for this video! I've been wanting to close things with my therapist but I was a lil afraid and hesitant and she pushed me in continuing coming to her, but I never had anything to tell her cuz I didn't feel comfortable with her. After one year I managed to tell her that I wasn't going to see her again and she was angry about it 😅
Thank you for your effort and helping tendency. Kati I just wondering about the books list you kept on your hall. Can you make one video on that...? List of books you studied and collections you have? 🙂 🙏 🌷
I had a counselor for over a year that I thought was a good fit, and she revealed some things about her beliefs that were in stark contrast to my own. I didn’t want to, but had a nagging subconscious trying to tell me I couldn’t trust her with EMDR treatment because of her world views. Once the trust has been eroded, it has to end. It took over a year for her to reveal these parts of her and it was painful to realize that she found my worldview contemptible, which is not a healthy patient/counselor situation.
Thanks for this great video - I am somewhere around the second part - seeing my therapist, but at the moment I am doing good. But honestly I am not willing to end therapy right now. I had to end therapy once due to financial reasons. Unfortunately that plunged me into a deep hole and it took me over a year to find a new therapist, where I got subsidized sessions through social security. But that therapist also wasn't a good fit, never felt completely comfortable with her.
I ended with one therapist, since my insurance made me switch facilities,... it was a loss to me, cause beyond therapy, I'd consider her a friend, but I won't cross boundaries and call her outside of therapy. I do miss talking to her, as I do not socialize much, and she would challenge me on ideas, making me a more thought out person.
When this video is timed perfectly I ended with one therapist and then moved to a different type of therapy but stopped because he had 3 sessions in 4 where he cancelled. Now back on the waiting list so could be six more months but it’s interesting to see how I can cope well 99% of the time but definitely needing some work of situations that don’t come up often
Soon I might have to consider stopping therapy as I'm finally moving out of my parents house soon and that's what most of my sessions have been dealing with- coping with my parents etc
Wow this feels like such a coincidence. I started feeling better with meds and the sessions and recently also shared with my therapist that I don't think I'll need to prebook my next session, but I'll call again if I need to come back
Hi Kati, thank you for this video! It’s just what I needed I have a question I hope you can answer- what if I’ve been seeing someone for over 2 years, our relationship is great, we did amazing work together, she helped me tremendously, but lately I just feel blah about her and don’t look forward to going to therapy. I kind of feel upset at her and I don’t feel like she understands me the way she used to... We spoke about me feeling like she’s less there for me a few times but the feeling keeps coming up in different ways and different scenarios and I don’t know why and what to do about it. I still need therapy! I’m not done at all Thank you so much for all your great content!!
I'm curious about the black pillow. It looks very comforting, how you can put your arms through it. Is it one big opening, ot two smaller openings? Is it fuzzy on the inside?
I received a full year of CBT without ever knowing it was CBT. I was taught breathing exercises and grounding techniques without being told what they were or why I was being taught them, or even having the realization they were being taught to me. Could your therapist just be subtle? Two of my therapists in the past would "share things that help" in regards to situations, almost conversationally, the way a friend might bring something up.
@@CalibanTaylor it’s possible. I often feel like I’m in the dark as to what we are working on. I hate that feeling. I like knowing what the plan is and what we’re doing.
I have been to several therapists and I have the feeling that none of them helped me in a meaningful way. Now, I know that is probably something more to do with me than than with them. Still, I wonder if I should stop seeing my current therapist since it's not going anywhere really
What about after a couple of years with a therapist you feel that you have gotten everything you can with that particular person and the reasons why you started but now need something different?
it seems when i tell my therapist i would like to slow things down she is the same way very understanding and lets me know that anytime i need her she is there with that said it seems when im feeling like i want to stop some kind of shit its the fan and i have know one to talk to so im like here we go again call the therapist its hard to pull away especially when you really have know one to turn to i have no relatives friends there filled with there drama so its a therapist i rely on i was doing good every other week but life events im back to once a week everyone is different with these things and there are times i feel maybe i need someone different anyways thank you very much for this post it was very helpful always look forward to hearing from you good stuff again thank you
If you do a part 2 could you address when your therapist is retiring or maybe relocating? I’m having mine retire right now and figuring out how to navigate that has been a challenge. Love your videos thank you!!
I need to speak to my therapist about ending therapy. After 2 years I’m still not able to move past things. He is starting to constantly begin our sessions 10 minutes late. Talking and dwelling every week is not helping. I’m doing IFS and that’s helping more. Talk therapy is making me feel worse. I don’t have the desire to find a new one. I feel like I constantly had to justify my feelings. I don’t feel like my feelings or hopes are a bad thing. I feel better having them. When I try to talk about it I am again hearing from my therapist and everyone else that people change their mind all the time except about me. Because I’m such a bad person no one can ever think positively about me again. But when I do IFS in realize where those thoughts are coming from and I can work through them. I also see a nurse practitioner for my medicine. That’s three therapist that is way too much. It also makes me feel really bad about myself having so many therapists. Like I’m so broken that I need 24 seven care and I really don’t. I function fine in life. It’s the excessive talking and dwelling and not being able to work through my excessive thoughts that are hurting me.
Wow Kati stop reading my mind it’s rudeee
Hahaha 🤣
hahah!! So sorry!
same
Everyone’s journey is their journey, and there really is no right or wrong. If you’re doing something that makes you feel better, I would say keep doing it..But therapy also costs money and time, and the only person that knows where to allocate those things is you.
I think that is a problem in therapy... theres way too many variables there's no pay off. There's no guarantee a plan is going to work. I'm willing to work hard but I NEED to know if it's going to work and what the payoff is before hand. Is that so hard to ask out of you therapists
„I‘m not going anywhere“ is exactly what my therapist told me as well when I addressed my fears of „losing“ her 😬
Your fear of losing your therapist is because you're not fully healed
@@talineclaeys3092 I know that haha I just started with therapy a couple months ago, so I still have a lot to learn ^^
@@niyugrey Okay, than I'm relieved😄 take care
@@talineclaeys3092 😘😘
The thing is, mine did left me
I had seven years of therapy and towards the end my therapist was trying to wean me off. I just wanted to make sure I had done everything possible to make sure I had control of my anger issues (I had). She taught me well, as if I was a young paduan learning.
Mine ended when I realized I couldn't be honest with my therapist anymore due to the fear of involuntary committal to a hospital. Start therapy before your issues cause more issues, people.
So true. I hope you are well
My moms making me go to therapy but that’s why I’m scared. I know, before I’ve even got help, that I can’t be honest abt my feelings bc of what they will try and do so I’m very anxious to start this stuff and I’m really dreading it since I know that I can’t ever get the *FULL* help I need 🤷🏻♀️
@@bailey-qf9hw It is always useful to talk to your therapist about what to expect. I don't know what the rules are where you live, but I think it's true generally that therapists can't disclose anything you say to them, even to your parents, unless you pose a threat to someone's safety. This could vary based on age, don't take anything I say for granted because I don't know your full situation.
I think it is generally true that you don't need all your problems solved by your therapist, they just need to help get you into a mental place where you can rely on your loved ones, the people that care about you to slowly decrease the effects of your illness on your life.
My case is not the average, I had noone to fall back on, noone that would want to help, so I was doomed to fail.
@@zsfekete5211 in my case they would be obligated to tell my mom and go further since it would be a danger to myself so I’m scared to be honest abt that part so I’m going to try and just get help for the rest and see if some of those coping mechanisms help get rid of that bigger feeling and obviously if it doesn’t help then I will let them take further steps but that’s going to be my last resort if that makes sense 🤷🏻♀️😅
@@bailey-qf9hw I would say don’t worry but I believe your emotions shouldn’t be repressed. Your therapist is there to help you open up and as long as you work hard, you will be fine. I totally understand being scared for your first session. I was too. It is scarry and there’s nothing wrong with that
The pillow grab is on point. Freaking love your work Kati!!
AMEN!
I feel very seen with Patient/Client Kati constantly hugging the soft pillow
Wow ... the "not feeling your therapist is a good fit" one. I could just come out and say it?? This is new information 🤔 thank you Kati ...
It's crucial to address directly. The goal of therapy becomes moot if the process is half-a$$ed. The therapist would be glad that you took the initiative to look for someone better
I never had the guts...
@@ralfwashington1502 Me too, I ended up wasting money and time because of it
@@user-yk3qs6dr2w yup exactly
You can pretty much say anything to a therapist. Unless you are intentionally trying to start a fight, you’re not gonna start one.
Omg Kati u read my mind I’m literally going through the process in deciding if I want to end my therapy thank you
I hope the video was helpful :) xoxo
Me too! That was very realistic and helpful.
Therapy is a professional relationship that ends when it has worked, when it has achieved what it set out to do. All good therapists should be working towards it ending :)
the timing!! I just had a talk with my psychologist about the possibility of therapy ending in a couple of months, which sounds scary but also good because progress!!
also.. love this type of video, it makes me feel really safe. you're killing it kati!!
Me too! It seems scary, but is a great step to be going to ❤️
Omg!! Yes scary, but yay you!! I am so glad you are feeling better and talking about taking a break :) Hooray for progress!!! xoxo
There's at least one other way of the end of therapy missing: Your insurance isn't covering it (anymore) and you can't afford to pay for it yourself.
Yep that was the way for me twice. I hate the fights with my insurance (not only about this issue). And once someone suddenly moved that was even worse. Especially because I never trusted anyone as much as her.
I think if you need treatment, you should get it for free and for as long as you need... but as we know life's not fair 😏
This video is specific to positive ways therapy may end. I will be making a part 2 that explores therapy endings that are less than ideal. 🤗
@@Katimorton I see. Thank you for your answer.
@@Katimorton My therapist died whilst I was seeing her (not actually while I was in session, in between sessions). Obviously this was an awful tragedy primarily for her and her family and friends, but I never expected to have to deal with that on top of my own difficulties.
@@Katimorton I'm looking forward to that. Recently I had something similar to the last one, but after going to that person for about 10 years. I confronted her on some of her bad behaviours (like some homophobic remarks) and she decieded to end our therapy abruptly. I still don't know how to cope with everything that it entailed.
You forgot about when therapy comes to an abrupt ending without warning because your therapist gives up on you. Happened to me last month and it has sent me into a spiraling down fall I can't slow down, much less get out of.
I’m so sorry that happened to you.
I’m going through the same thing right now. I’m sorry this happened to you. You’re not alone 🥺
Not sure on the details of your experience, but in a lot of situations it's unethical to just stop seeing a client who can pay for and who needs care.
Same. On my first session ever
Your therapist was right in the fact that she could not help you. With the way she handled it, I can that it’s not your fault. Some therapists are not very good at their job. Like yes, it is not the therapists responsibility to make you better but that doesn’t mean a therapist can’t do their job poorly.
My insurance says I've had enough therapy and my therapist says that's the rules and I need to think about stopping or looking for someone else (again). I get 15 sessions to deal with that but I can't. Especially after my Somatic Experiencing Practitioner (trauma therapy and chronic pain) suddenly left last year.
Why don't they take into consideration all the shit that happened to me the last couple of years additionally to the childhood trauma? It's just not fair. I didn't choose this. I lost my whole life due to a physical illness and I've been homebound for 5 years. When the Covid lockdown will be over, I will still be stuck at home. I just want to be healthy physically and mentally.
I’m so sorry. Chronic illness sucks and I empathize with the last statement that once COVID is over, essentially your life stays the same. Is there a way to get support from neighbors, family and friends to help you around the house and for emotional release of stress and venting?
Making this video as role play is BRILLIANT!
Hi Kati! I dont feel like my therapist and I are a good fit, and I really think its more stressful seeing her rather than helpful. I would go and see another therapist, but here’s the problem: There is only one therapist in my area! If I want to change therapists, I’m going to have to drive for 1 and 1/2 hour to get there! I don’t have time for that when I’ve got work every day! I’m just saying this to let everyone know that finding a therapist that fits for you isn’t always as easy. I live in the north of Norway (yes, I’m Julia who sent in the voice memo to otdm haha) and the distances between things up here are faaar! Anyway, thanks for your great content!❤️
Can you try virtual therapy (over Zoom or phone)? Just an idea!
Apparently teletherapy is a thing .... maybe give that a try?
I’ve tried that, but I dont feel conected and present then...
This was great. At first I didn't understand what was going on, and I was like, wait is everything okay, Kati? And then it was like, oh no, Kati is the therapist and the client.
My therapist is leaving. That's one other reason why it's ending. Scary though to see a new therapist or try to find the right fit as you explained. Great video. I need to see this. ❣️
If just more therapist wouldn't take it personal when they aren't the best fit. Many start interpreting that this would just show my problems I have to work on with them....
If all else fails tell them finances are tight and you need to end it. No hard feelings and it's understandable and they can't make it free
I am finding your videos a big help, following a year with redundancy and marriage separation I have never been so emotional and find watching you very calming
Sorry you’re going through a rough time, hope things get back on track soon! ❤️
Therapy can be a great addition to recovery but can easily become dependent on it. Thanks for sharing
this is a really helpful video especially since it shows how to have these conversations... i unfortunately had a bad end with my therapist due to her not being able to care for my needs and me not being able to communicate them. i was really mad at her for a long time but this video showed me how to talk about these things and now im considering to write her again to clear things up... so thanks for that
I love your videos. I can't imagine a time when I'll never need therapy (I'm 17 years and counting). It's such an important resource for me (in addition to books, UA-cam, etc). Stay safe and best wishes from Australia 🤗
Thank you so much Kati! I've recently gone from weekly to biweekly. It's good to know I can step back but still have access to the support I need.
Wow! I found this so believable and helpful for me to understand how it can play out! Thanks so much!
I’m a visual person and so I needed this. One of the many reasons I love movies so much.
This is a very good explanation. I am ending mine. It has been 15 years. What I need is to have painful memories ERASED. No amount of therapy, EMDR, expensive medications, meditation, walks, etc will not help. I have given a wholehearted effort and I am done.
You are a gem Katie, not sure every therapist handles the, “ you are not a good fit “. Excellent video.
Really well put together. Thanks. I wish there were more therapists like you out there.
Edit: that wasn’t intended to sound quite so negative. I am extremely fortunate that I had a truly gifted loving therapist for many many years. That’s unfortunately not everyone’s experience and I am actually speaking for them. 🌹
Bringing up my past seems worse then putting it in the back of my mind and focusing on current and future events
It does I'm sure. In my experience as a kid they gave me meds to keep me happy but never addressed much of it. As an adult who now has to spend the money and bring up REALLY old memories I resent that. It would have been better for me to face this (in a safe manner) as a kid in grade school then a dysfunctional adult. Its never fun but do it and get it over with so you can move on is my advice. Plus stress takes years off your life. Though we think its buried it really isn't. I found this out and now am trying to back track and spending my money instead of being covered by my parents
Thank you Kati, I was in therapy for quite awhile, but was starting to think that things would be OK if we stopped. However there was also a fear of stopping after so long. At the final session, my therapist said it was time and I knew she was right. I had the tools to cope. And I do!!! All the best to everyone going through this. Liked the holding the pillow thing too
Same experience here. I left therapy yesterday. I haven’t even come close to fixing all of my mental issues but I have learned the skills to fix it on my own. Now I am always happy even when I’m sad.
So often I watch a new video of kati s do with therapy or subject of depression or anxiety and can completely relate to things kati talks about she can read minds and calms with her voice looking forward to Thursdays AKA
this feels so disconnected to my experiences with counselling in the uk, the counselling itself was great and benefited me loads but there's like a 6 month minimum waiting list to start your sessions here and if you stop you cant get back on that waiting list for another 6 months so its basically a year till you can get counselling again and there's like a max number of sessions so for me counselling ended when i left the college and then the uni that provided me the service or later when we just ran out of sessions and i just couldn't motivate myself to get back into it with a new person after that :/ like everyone i met did their best to help and many did help a lot but with the weird regulations and lack of nhs funding the service you talk about here is just a dream for us :/ it may be different for rich folks who can afford private services idk :/
I loved you showing the different therapy optios available to everyone. Thank you for the information ❤
Very nice video. :) I myself had to go through this process a few times and I'm so glad it was always a positive experience for me even though it was very tough and scary.
Lol. This video has me on edge. I really can’t imagine ending my therapy. Scary just thinking about it.
That's one nice thing about finding a shrink that young. You have a long time to work through things before they retire typically. Nothing worse than spilling your guts to a shrink you trust and breaking through right as they retire. Back to trying to now trust the new one.
Kati, so I have been going to same therapist for about 15 + years and I feel the I need to move on because I know that We don't have boundaries like you talk about because everything about her and I have always wanted her to be my best friend, and you opened my eyes alot but I think that I do Stop going to her that I would need to mourn her.
Had a similar experience and although totally healthy and necessary to end the relationship, I grieved loosing that relationship for over a year. Hang in there and if your gut is telling you it’s no longer an ethical relationship and has become a dual relationship, have the courage to end it and allow another therapist to help you grieve that loss. Mine new therapist was amazing at helping me process through my grief and understand healthy boundaries again between a client and therapist.
My first therapist was definitely not a good fit, but like this scenario, I was really uncomfortable bringing it up. Thankfully, she recognized that we weren't a good fit and ended our sessions for me. The DBT therapist and group I found subsequently are really working well for me now.
Wow this almost the conversation I started having with my therapist today.
great video, and I loved the role-playing! makes it more relatable and grabs even more of my attention.
What a timing! I had my last session today, just before seeing the video was posted.
It was a bit scary and sad, because I haven't seen my therapist in person since March 2020. There were tears. But it was also rewarding to go over all we have done together and it was a relief to hear that the doors are open for me to go back if needed.
Thank you Kati and Kinions. I wouldn't have started therapy if it wasn't for you. And now I feel your support for ending it too. Thank you so much for everything.
Thank you I think I may have to end therapy. I've been with my therapist for two years and last week my therapist kept steering me away from what I wanted to discuss. I messaged her about it and she said that I find it difficult and that she finds it difficult to listen to. I think it's time to call it a day.
Some therapists are just not very good at their job. A therapist being a bad fit for someone should always come from the therapist not being a good fit for the client. If the client is not a good fit for the therapist then the therapist is not a very skilled therapist
I have issues with my therapist right now. This is my first time going to therapy and I've decided to take this step in order to improve myself, my emotions and social interactions with people. After 8 seasions I've started to feel like that it was not going anywhere, I had more questions and unresolves issues than before! Then she even told me that she doesn't think that I need therapy and I felt so much anger afterwards. As if I was talking for nothing and my issues were not taken seriously. I wrote her what I was feeling afterwards and that I didn't think that it's a good fit. She still wants at least one last session to talk about my MMPI test but I feel so off-put right now that I don't even want to talk to her a last time. I don't think I will be doing anymore therapy ever.
I think my therapist can't wait for me to leave. I sometimes just want to cancel my next appointment and never see her again coz I get the idea she doesn't know what to do with me😢
I’m so shocked some therapists message, text, or communicate with their clients outside of therapy and help when [we] are going through it. I messaged mine something I can’t seem to talk about but really want to, last week after our session and she never replied. It makes me feel like I’m being overlooked and like I’m a burden. Now I know when I see her I’ll find it even harder to open for help. I know I need more help .. maybe it’s time I ask for someone else.
Wow kati. Thank you so much. This is exactly what a therapist should do. You made feel better about my dilemas:)
I love this editing!! Your talking to yourself!! Yay.. I hate roll playing. 🥺 Thanks for sharing
This scenarios were so good. Thx Kati.
Thank you Kati! Love this.
Ps: the pillow with the cozy arm place is AMAZING
I bet that feels like a hug. I would squish it close to me and hold near and dear. 🤗
This video was a journey for me. I spent most of it trying to figure out why I have been binge watching KallMeKris on TikTok and loving every second of it, yet was so excruciatingly uncomfortable during this. And then there was that last scenario and it clicked: none of them resonated with me. The first two are something I can't even imagine myself experiencing. It's like watching someone pet a unicorn! Then the third scenario I've been through and the last one...I didn't realize you could grieve for someone who has never been in your life. Which makes sense. We're all grieving the things we could be doing during the pandemic, or the future we had planned for ourselves.
I had my last session with my therapist last week. I knew I was going to be moving soon (although at that point in time, it wasn't too clear yet), so I wanted to wrap things up neatly instead of suddenly disappearing when I needed to go. It was sad to leave but I've gotten so much better in the last 7 months that it also felt right. She made it very clear that I could come back whenever I was back home, and even offered to do online sessions until I found support in my new town.
Dear Kati, I had my last session with my first therapist yesterday, majorly because she is shifting the platform we used for therapy(and my institute provides service free from that particular platform )
Even though our sessions were going towards twice a month, I still wished it could have been a bit slower, she did inform me a month in advance and your videos on the topic helped too but it was still sad to feel through that transition, I am feeling better and hopeful for my next journey with another counsellor, but I am really glad for your work! thank you!
I ended my therapy today because I am sick with this completely useless and annoying process. I have had no progress and honestly continue suffering. But the therapy actually didn't change a thing in my situation and I don't want to waste my money on something that doesn't help.
same here, i ended my therapy because of the same thing
When I came out to tell my former therapist I needed more tools for healing my complex trauma because I didn’t get them after 3 years of working with him, he became defensive, and reactive, and began to tell me things didn’t work because of my issues, I asked which issues, and he said to me I had a disorder… I was so confused, that I asked him: what disorder, what are you talking about? And he said yes, your disorder, you have BPD… it was horrible. I wasn't even planning to leave him, but wanted to let him know I was going to look for more help with trauma experts… After this, I visited a psychiatrist about that BPD diagnosis, and no, I don’t have BPD. I didn’t know my therapist was that bad until that happened… I’d love all therapists to react like the one in this video!
Thanks for this video. Been with my therapist for almost a year and have hit a plateau. Havent made the progress that I wanted and have come to the realization that we are not a good fit. I believe my therapist has come to the same conclusion long before now and looking back, since we are doing video sessions and my therapist will run errands in the middle of the session ( signal will go out mid speech ) and my therapist will also not follow up on certain sentiments that I have expressed. Everybody is not for everybody so I may restart in the future but I should have trusted my instincts sooner.
I resonate with the pillow grab. I’ve done it and seen it done when in RTC and IP for ED…I swear all of my STRESS collects in my STOMACH…! 😬
I feel like I'm in the last, but not so much. I am truly connected with mine, but things aren't improving for too long and after a few days I feel the same. Things aren't worsening but neither improving, I don't want to drop off, but I still want to see something else that helps me get out of this stumbling block. What should I do in that situation?
First of all I think it is good that you are truly connected with your therapist and that things arent going downhill. That's is a big step, I would say. Now, you want things to improve, and that's always the next step, and often the goal. So I think that you should tell that to your therapist. Tell him/her that things are not worsening, but neither improving and say that you would like to do some different things so you can improve. The therapist will most currently understand that, and find new ways for you to improve. :)
was in the exact same situation 3 months ago. i couldn't be honest and my therapist made things worse. i always feel worse after opening up. after i stopped i was happier for a bit but then my mental health started deteriorating:/ (i struggle with family issues, disordered eating and sometimes depression) tbh i think the best solution would be meds but i'm too scared
You may find this video helpful! ua-cam.com/video/_KKgSQUXYxo/v-deo.html
i love this format Kati!!
What about when they say you need a higher level of care and abruptly refuse to ever see you again, tell you they’ll email some references and if you ever need help again find someone else. Coming from the only person who has been kind and compassionate and you’ve felt close to, this one is like knife to the heart.
I would interpret that as them seeing that what they are trying isn't working and to save both time and energy of both you they say try someone else who might help.
I started therapy and I feel like I am misunderstood by the therapist. I feel like she takes everything at face value without asking enough questions to see the real motivation. When I feel misunderstood, I seem to go down that route too and portray myself as if it is true even though I know it is not exactly the full story. I often feel like the full story takes longer to express and that is is hard to remember all the details. I tend to forget the main points of matters. I just know that I haven't said the full story behind something. Usually, I'm just pretending for the conversation to be over since it makes me uncomfortable and I have in my mind that she doesn't know what she's doing when she doesn't ask enough questions. I'm only pretending that she's doing a good job so that she can feel good about herself and I don't feel helpless.
I'm pretty sure I have social anxiety and this is likely a way that it is showing itself
Therapists can often make mistakes. The best therapists will make sure that you guys are on the same page. If the therapist is not an expert than it’s your job to tell your therapist that they got it wrong. Therapists, no matter how good they are, can’t know what you’re thinking.
This was really helpful. And I love the pillow plug!! sneaky! lol!
After 3 years of therapy I just fibbed my way out of it because it was a waste of everyone’s time (including mine) as I was as non-compliant you could ever get (my excuse? I was a little shit kid). After a while I actually managed to heal myself from my PTSD and as of right now I don’t have any symptoms and I’m as happy as a clam! Stopping therapy actually kind of saved my life (made me be proactive and save my own damn self)
My former therapist thought I was going to end my life and called the police who showed up and checked on me. I wasn't actually suicidal so they left after about 20 minutes. My therapist rang me the morning after and told me that him having to call the police means I don't trust him any more (which wasn't true) therfore he's ending therapy with me. He left me upset and confused, and to this day I feel betrayed and abandoned by him.
Wait, your therapist said that because he 'had to' call the police it meant that you didn't trust him anymore? Why was his decision to call the police in any way your responsibility? It was his choice. I hope you found a better therapist, one who knows what his/her boundaries and responsibilities entail. Good luck :)
Just broke up with my therapist :0 thanks for mentioning the "things aren't working out" option..
6 months to go... thank you for this!
I recently had a similar conversation with my therapist about having less frequent visits because of my progress. It felt awkward and I thought I would combust. It ended up going really well and they were understanding.
I would get to a point with a therapist where I either had nothing left to talk about it they weren't helping, but it felt strangely difficult to stop. Like they wouldn't let me go. I had one therapist call me back for a session after I'd stopped, and when I went in, she asked what I had wanted to talk about. It was very strange because I hadn't reached out first. It's also hard to get out of therapy that you don't need when there's a narcissistic mother in the picture forcing you to one therapist after another (you know, to fix you). I've had some very good therapists in my life and I think they can be very helpful, but I've also had some that seem more interested in the money and forcing you to relive old traumas that you've already worked through.
Your videos are so helpful dear
Awe I am so glad :) xoxo
Once again, oddly timely
I have to tell my therapist that I don't think it's a good fit and I'm honestly panicking. I canceled our next session because I just...I don't want to talk to her anymore. This definitely gave me something to think about.
I just canceled my appointment with mine. She keeps calling me and telling me if I don’t see her, she has to close my case. Ok. I don’t care if she doesn’t like it.
You could lie and say its do to money issues. Say thanks but I need to watch my budget. And leave it at that. They won't think your manic or that you hate them. In the USA money is a valid reason for stopping it I bet
Thank you so much for this video! I've been wanting to close things with my therapist but I was a lil afraid and hesitant and she pushed me in continuing coming to her, but I never had anything to tell her cuz I didn't feel comfortable with her. After one year I managed to tell her that I wasn't going to see her again and she was angry about it 😅
Ugh I’m so sorry she reacted that way.
Some therapist suck. This must be pretty tough man.
haha! I loved your sneeky plug of your cosy cushions lol - and the vid! thanks!
Thank you for your effort and helping tendency. Kati I just wondering about the books list you kept on your hall. Can you make one video on that...? List of books you studied and collections you have? 🙂 🙏 🌷
I had a counselor for over a year that I thought was a good fit, and she revealed some things about her beliefs that were in stark contrast to my own. I didn’t want to, but had a nagging subconscious trying to tell me I couldn’t trust her with EMDR treatment because of her world views. Once the trust has been eroded, it has to end. It took over a year for her to reveal these parts of her and it was painful to realize that she found my worldview contemptible, which is not a healthy patient/counselor situation.
Love your channel!!!
Awe thanks :) xoxo
Thanks for this great video - I am somewhere around the second part - seeing my therapist, but at the moment I am doing good. But honestly I am not willing to end therapy right now.
I had to end therapy once due to financial reasons. Unfortunately that plunged me into a deep hole and it took me over a year to find a new therapist, where I got subsidized sessions through social security. But that therapist also wasn't a good fit, never felt completely comfortable with her.
Thank you for this😊! I’ll definitely refer back to this when I am ready to end my therapy for good😊. But I am not quite there yet..and that’s a ok🌻
I ended with one therapist, since my insurance made me switch facilities,... it was a loss to me, cause beyond therapy, I'd consider her a friend, but I won't cross boundaries and call her outside of therapy. I do miss talking to her, as I do not socialize much, and she would challenge me on ideas, making me a more thought out person.
This is going to be good.
When this video is timed perfectly I ended with one therapist and then moved to a different type of therapy but stopped because he had 3 sessions in 4 where he cancelled. Now back on the waiting list so could be six more months but it’s interesting to see how I can cope well 99% of the time but definitely needing some work of situations that don’t come up often
Can’t wait to see this after work!! ❤️
these are so helpful as a therapist in training
I thought you were asking us, the viewers, if you were gonna stop uploading! Omg you scared me!
Does anyone know where I can find that pillow case that she is putting her arms through?
Kati sells them on her website.
I’m having them made! www.katimorton.com/products small batches for now. Super soft 🤗🤗
@@Katimorton thank you!!
@@TheHuber26 thank you!
Please pin this comment.
I had to end therapy when I became extremely depressed from threrapy to the point I was suicidal.
I had to stop Therapy too, as it was making me very Depressed!
Soon I might have to consider stopping therapy as I'm finally moving out of my parents house soon and that's what most of my sessions have been dealing with- coping with my parents etc
Wow this feels like such a coincidence. I started feeling better with meds and the sessions and recently also shared with my therapist that I don't think I'll need to prebook my next session, but I'll call again if I need to come back
Hi Kati, thank you for this video! It’s just what I needed
I have a question I hope you can answer- what if I’ve been seeing someone for over 2 years, our relationship is great, we did amazing work together, she helped me tremendously, but lately I just feel blah about her and don’t look forward to going to therapy. I kind of feel upset at her and I don’t feel like she understands me the way she used to... We spoke about me feeling like she’s less there for me a few times but the feeling keeps coming up in different ways and different scenarios and I don’t know why and what to do about it. I still need therapy! I’m not done at all
Thank you so much for all your great content!!
thanks for posting this this was good and its my birthday this Thursday have a great week! :)
I'm curious about the black pillow. It looks very comforting, how you can put your arms through it. Is it one big opening, ot two smaller openings? Is it fuzzy on the inside?
www.katimorton.com/products your arms go through and it is soft and fuzzy inside (same material as on the outside. 🤗🤗
So my therapist has never mentioned coping skills in the 8 months I’ve seen them...is that a problem?
Yes! If not by name they should at least be teaching you ways to deal with life’s hardships.
I received a full year of CBT without ever knowing it was CBT. I was taught breathing exercises and grounding techniques without being told what they were or why I was being taught them, or even having the realization they were being taught to me. Could your therapist just be subtle? Two of my therapists in the past would "share things that help" in regards to situations, almost conversationally, the way a friend might bring something up.
@@CalibanTaylor it’s possible. I often feel like I’m in the dark as to what we are working on. I hate that feeling. I like knowing what the plan is and what we’re doing.
@@CalibanTaylor, that’s interesting. I would like names of techniques and things stated to me specifically.
Thank you for this Video!
I have been to several therapists and I have the feeling that none of them helped me in a meaningful way. Now, I know that is probably something more to do with me than than with them. Still, I wonder if I should stop seeing my current therapist since it's not going anywhere really
what about when your therapist is going on maternity leave?
What about after a couple of years with a therapist you feel that you have gotten everything you can with that particular person and the reasons why you started but now need something different?
THE PILLOW GRAB xD
it seems when i tell my therapist i would like to slow things down she is the same way very understanding and lets me know that anytime i need her she is there with that said it seems when im feeling like i want to stop some kind of shit its the fan and i have know one to talk to so im like here we go again call the therapist its hard to pull away especially when you really have know one to turn to i have no relatives friends there filled with there drama so its a therapist i rely on i was doing good every other week but life events im back to once a week everyone is different with these things and there are times i feel maybe i need someone different anyways thank you very much for this post it was very helpful always look forward to hearing from you good stuff again thank you
If you do a part 2 could you address when your therapist is retiring or maybe relocating? I’m having mine retire right now and figuring out how to navigate that has been a challenge. Love your videos thank you!!
I need to speak to my therapist about ending therapy. After 2 years I’m still not able to move past things. He is starting to constantly begin our sessions 10 minutes late. Talking and dwelling every week is not helping. I’m doing IFS and that’s helping more. Talk therapy is making me feel worse. I don’t have the desire to find a new one.
I feel like I constantly had to justify my feelings. I don’t feel like my feelings or hopes are a bad thing. I feel better having them. When I try to talk about it I am again hearing from my therapist and everyone else that people change their mind all the time except about me. Because I’m such a bad person no one can ever think positively about me again. But when I do IFS in realize where those thoughts are coming from and I can work through them.
I also see a nurse practitioner for my medicine. That’s three therapist that is way too much. It also makes me feel really bad about myself having so many therapists. Like I’m so broken that I need 24 seven care and I really don’t. I function fine in life. It’s the excessive talking and dwelling and not being able to work through my excessive thoughts that are hurting me.