I have a friend who did the same thing during the dead week before finals, by leaving his car at a corner store that he usually walks to. He wound up killing the battery in his key by walking around the entire parking garage, for his large apartment complex, like five times continuously pressing the button to try to get the car to honk. Later, an exasperated cop (because he thought it was stolen, since the towing company didn't have it) showed my friend his car at the corner store, and told my friend to rest more during dead week.
I overdosed on acid once, freaked out..., and spent at least 10 minutes looking for 911 in the phone book while the walls were melting all around me. 😱😂
Christina Aguilera once asked in a live, televised interview where the Cannes Film Festival was being held that year? LOL ...and, no, she wasn't joking!
I worked at this gas station for a year when I was 20. To kill boredom near closing I would stare out at this brilliant star in the distance and make special wishes. It kinda became this thing I did to stay motivated that one day I would be making more money in a better job. One night it began to flicker and disappeared. Next night it was back with an orange-yellow glow. Turned out I had been wishing on a street light all that time. I just couldn't see the stupid pole because of trees. :/
Couldn't find the key to my filing cabinet for 2 years, then I moved and found the key taped to the side of the cabinet where I put it so it wouldn't get lost.
When I was younger, I thought the phrase “I’m ready as I’ll ever be” was “I’m ready as a leverbee.” I always wondered what a leverbee was, and you can probably imagine the hilarious look on my parent’s faces as they were holding back laughter when I finally remembered to ask. They still make fun of me to this day 😂
I thought the saying "made in the shade" was one whole word and I just said "manisay" 😅 Also instead of "merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily" in row row row your boat, I sang "muckidy, muckidy..." I have no idea where that word came from
Omg this had me crying of laughter at 3 am! I tried reading your comment to my husband and I couldn’t get thru it, he had to take my phone and read it himself. This was hysterical 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
When I was little I thought countries were all actually different planets and that's why we used a plane to get across #imdumbidontevenknowwhyithoughthtat
+Fariha Abedin when I was younger I thought babies came out the leg meaning I thought they had to cut the leg open to get the baby out but the I learned the came out of the womb
When I was a kid I used to think that abduction meant aliens were taking people so every time I heard on the news that a kid had been abducted, I 100% thought aliens took them. It used to freak me the hell out.
I put my pizza in the oven. After 1 hour I realized the pizza is still in the oven. I ran upstairs and saw that I luckily forgot to turn on the oven. DoubleDumbness saved the pizza :D Edit: Sorry for grammar and/or spelling mistakes. I speak german. :)
Whenever I hear someone walking behind me on the sidewalk, I look up and to the right to try to see them in the rearview mirror. It doesn’t work well without a car.
Yep, I use to drive my truck to work everyday and then I drove my car one time and when I came out to the parking lot I thought someone had stolen my truck.
I'm also a Sims addict, so I have tried to press the 0 key before realizing this is real life, there is no keyboard for it and you can't pause it either...
Lorisa214 Theyve always done this 😐 ... why are people all of a sudden shocked?😕 and Mr Turtle Titan 4 Evah (boss name) is right if you just want to read them go on his twitter and if you want to hear them have a friend read them to you😄... calling this five year old foolery is being silly and foolish😦 If youre a fan of fallon you should already know he is silly or cheesy and accept it however youre entitled to your opinion ☺
When I was a kid I thought Arnold Schwarzenegger's first name was "Aneshashenegah", or to make that more legible, "Ah-ne-sha-sheh-neh-gah". I was so shocked when I found out it was just Arnold.
When my brother was like 3or 4 my mom told him to tell our dad that Arnold Schwarzenegger was on TV. When my brother went up to my dad he said "daddy, you're an egg eater!!" And walked away. My dad was so confused.
A couple of years ago, still sleepy in the morning, after pouring myself a bowl of Cheerios, noticed something was a bit different from usual and realised I'd poured myself a bowl of cat biscuits (^_^;) #ImDumb
When I was 7 or 8.. 1. my older sister’s ADMIRER asked me to say “hi” to her for him. I told my sister; “your REMINDER said hi” 2. My family was talking about my dad’s permanent visa and I asked them “what’s an eternal visa?” I remember choosing among the words eternal, forever and everlasting. Lol
I LOVE the riffs!! Together with hearing random Quest-Love laughs is my favorite part of this show. Also funny how the camera guy zooms out for the imaginary stuff 😛
On the previous hashtag video, people were complaining that he skimmed through the hashtags and didn't take his time and now people are complaining about him going to slow. Can't satisfy everyone.
Carla V. Santos I did the samething today. A year after your post. I found them fast but, almost gouged my eye out. I reached too fast, lol... Ppl tell me to wear one of those "things" around my neck that hold a person's glasses on... aaah NØ! I just can't bring myself to wear one. Maybe in another 20yrs, lol 😎
First time I went to Trader Joes, I started checking out my items until a guy came up to me and asked if I needed help. I said "yeah I don't know what to do next", he said "we don't do self checkout here"... I was pretty embarrassed.
I know right! The Trader Joes checkout line is so weird looking, I've been there like 10 times and still don't really know what the hell to do. I just hope somebody else is checking out too and I just follow them.
I love their sense of humour. They have an over active imagination me and my friends have the same humour. Glad to see alot of people have it and understand it.
Everybody complaining about the banter and jokes between Jimmy and Steve - What would the bit be without that? All it would be is Jimmy reading things that other people wrote, not adding anything. What kind of bit would that be if the HOST OF THE SHOW just removed himself from the bit?
Not sure who will read this, but I played a mean prank on my brother once when I was in second grade (he is 3 years younger than me). We had gone to see The Lion King musical at the Pantages Theater in LA and I told my brother that the actor who played Mufasa literally died every single time they had a showing, so they had to get a new actor to play him for every new showing. I think I told him the truth later that night, but he still hasn't forgiven me to this day haha.
Here's a tip for y'all: hover your mouse cursor over the progress bar and skip to whenever the Twitter quotes are actually seen. No one will blame ya :)
When I was little, I thought the states were separate countries and I'm from Michigan, when we were stopping at a gas station in Ohio and went in there to get snacks, I was surprised when the cashier spoke English so I asked my dad, "Wait, Ohionans speak English?" He said, "Yeah" and I said, "So every country in the world speaks English now?" And he said, "No." and I said, "But we're in Ohio." And he said, "Well, Ohio isn't a separate country." And the cashier was just laughing the entire time. #ImDumb Also I used to think Washington DC was located in the state of Washington lol #ImDumb
That's happened before at the mall; I've ran into a mannequin and thought it was a person (and apologized) ; 2-3x , lol !! Terrible thing to admit in person ! 😂😂
I walked into someone the other day and I said "thank you," and they replied with "you're welcome."
you're
Oops 😂 Thank you!
+Beth Harper you're welcome 😂
One time I bumped into someone and was gonna say "I'm so sorry" but I accidentally said "I hope you're sorry"!!!
haha Omw! I did that once, only they didn't say "you're welcome" 🙈🙈
My father once drove to the corner store then walked home, and didn't remember until my mom asked where the car was.
LOL DON'T KILL ME
😂😂😂😂😂😂
LAL.
I have a friend who did the same thing during the dead week before finals, by leaving his car at a corner store that he usually walks to.
He wound up killing the battery in his key by walking around the entire parking garage, for his large apartment complex, like five times continuously pressing the button to try to get the car to honk.
Later, an exasperated cop (because he thought it was stolen, since the towing company didn't have it) showed my friend his car at the corner store, and told my friend to rest more during dead week.
I think I've done something like that before.
Yesterday, my roommate asked me “how do you spell ADHD?”
WOW THAT JUST GAVE ME A SMALL ANERUYSM ... WHAT?
Toy Story 2
Rex: "How do you spell FBI?"
"Quick, what's the number for 911?
Ey Dee Eych Dee
I overdosed on acid once, freaked out..., and spent at least 10 minutes looking for 911 in the phone book while the walls were melting all around me. 😱😂
I once said humans are 70% cucumbers instead of water
Tiernan Quirke I laughed so much! Got a chest infection and now I’m actually dying laughing! 😂
I'm DEAD 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
Wtf
Who knows, the way our brains work sometimes, we might actually be 70% cucumbers! 😂😂
Tiernan Quirke omg
My sister once said, "What's amnesia, I forgot...?"
Laura Bowden Good one 😂
I once told my father I know how to improve your memory and he said how and I pause for a minute then said oh I forgot
@@telikaandfam lol
Is that true?
I would reply: exactly.
you can always tell when they have extra time on this show
+Sean Williams I've always thought that hashtags segment was longer if the tweets were funnier than usual. lol.
Sean Williams that’s soooooooooooooooo true
Sean Williams exactly
I alwqys forward it to him reading because the long "jokes" take so long I just skip it.
The tweets are good. Their comments and other stuff is just annoying.
My friend once asked me “is Black Friday on a Thursday this year?”
I mean it really is now. Everything starts Thanksgiving
Christina Aguilera once asked in a live, televised interview where the Cannes Film Festival was being held that year? LOL ...and, no, she wasn't joking!
@@Hollins23maybe she needed directions and not just the general area of the city? 🤣
Once I hit my hand, hold my elbow and shouted "Oh, my leg!"
Love these hashtag videos. It's comforting to know that I'm not the only idiot walking on this planet.
+Amed Mustak Yeah I was thinking the same have a ton of these
Did you really think you were the only idiot? That's a pretty idiotic thing to believe
Lol
Humans brains are very flawed 😂
all the stuff they were doing in between the imdumb tweets were really annoying
yes the stupid little bits that they do are annoying and make the show bad.
I enjoy them imo
it's okay but he drags them on too long. if he did a little skit it would be fine but he drags them in for everrrrrrr
+Darwin's Puggle Are you related to Darwin's Bulldog?
totally agree...I'm not a big fan of Jimmy's sidekick..😑😑😑
I once bumped into a mannequine in a store and apologized thinking it was a real person #ImDumb
I bet you were on your phone. lol
I’ve done that!
Haven't we all tho 😂
Omg and you are leah “Ravenclaw” huh? XD Lmaoo
I did the same sis!😂❤
When I was little I was disappointed in my dad when I heard he was going to the drug store #ImDumb
Omg 😂😂😂😂
I always wait for the microwave to finish beeping before I take my food so it won't think I'm desperate..
Lol
Lol
Lol
Sara Liefke 🤣🤣🤣🤣
Scottish Girl 🤣🤣🤣
I worked at this gas station for a year when I was 20. To kill boredom near closing I would stare out at this brilliant star in the distance and make special wishes. It kinda became this thing I did to stay motivated that one day I would be making more money in a better job. One night it began to flicker and disappeared. Next night it was back with an orange-yellow glow. Turned out I had been wishing on a street light all that time. I just couldn't see the stupid pole because of trees. :/
@@aswinlal5341 I like how much you care 😂😂
This is awesome 😂😂
Omg. Lol
Really funny!
😂😂😂😂😂
Couldn't find the key to my filing cabinet for 2 years, then I moved and found the key taped to the side of the cabinet where I put it so it wouldn't get lost.
😂
Lol
I feel this comment too hard.
I'm especially amazed that you kept the locked cabinet for two years - and didn't break it open or get a locksmith to open it 😅
Happy these are showing up on my recommended again 🤗
Me too
Having this video on recommendation after 5 years 😂😂😂😂
this was like 90% bullshit 10%tweets
true
+tommy getenet
It's part of the shtick.
You can fast forward around those grown men acting immature
+Thrasher_ 92 agree 100%
Ikr, they annoy me but I stay for the tweets lol
We're laughing now, but those interactive yearbooks could totally be a thing of the future! 😂😂😂
"Hey Man"
hey man
Exactly what I was thinking 😂
***** the fact that your name is Tony stark makes this comment a million time cooler
Patricia B in France I was thinking the same thing!
My dad went to dunkin donuts and proceeded to ask: "Do you guys sell donuts?"
I think that was just a dad joke lol
To be fair to your dad, if he listens to Barenaked Ladies, I can understand why he'd confirm to make sure
ZhangtheGreat true,true.
When I was younger, I thought the phrase “I’m ready as I’ll ever be” was “I’m ready as a leverbee.” I always wondered what a leverbee was, and you can probably imagine the hilarious look on my parent’s faces as they were holding back laughter when I finally remembered to ask. They still make fun of me to this day 😂
Samantha Holt that’s funny!
IT'S THE BEE WHICH PRODUCES WAX OUT OF WHICH LEVER SOAPS ARE MADE. LEVERBEE 😂👍
I thought the saying "made in the shade" was one whole word and I just said "manisay" 😅
Also instead of "merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily" in row row row your boat, I sang "muckidy, muckidy..." I have no idea where that word came from
Omg this had me crying of laughter at 3 am! I tried reading your comment to my husband and I couldn’t get thru it, he had to take my phone and read it himself. This was hysterical 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
😂😂🤣
When I was little I thought countries were all actually different planets and that's why we used a plane to get across #imdumbidontevenknowwhyithoughthtat
+Fariha Abedin #unessessarilylonghashtagsarelame
***** #ivebeeninfluencedbytumblreventhoidonthaveanaccount
+Fariha Abedin when I was younger I thought babies came out the leg meaning I thought they had to cut the leg open to get the baby out but the I learned the came out of the womb
+Brad Meyer WTF? Hahahaha
Hahaha same actually, I know I did because I have a picture I drew because when I thought that.
Just read the damn tweets Jimmy
+Alejo Lopera Inglés then you would miss the fun part
UA-cam allows you to fast forward
Just have some damn humor Alejo!
I think that their reactions make it better.
Thank you. They think they're funny but clearly just trying to stretch the segment to eat up time.
I once phoned my friend to tell him he forgot his phone with me
I stopped at a stop sign and waited till the light that was 2 blocks in front of me turned green🤦
Not so dumb, if you were planning to floor it ...
Last week I was watching some show. The guy on TV waved, and I instinctively waved back.
+this is bacon omg really that was really funny hahaha I do that sometimes actually
Oh my god, I can't stop laughing!
When I was a kid I used to think that abduction meant aliens were taking people so every time I heard on the news that a kid had been abducted, I 100% thought aliens took them. It used to freak me the hell out.
i once heard a news flash about "american laws enforced on an alien" and I legit thought it meant alien from outer space!
Man, THAT'S ROUGH.
I put my pizza in the oven. After 1 hour I realized the pizza is still in the oven. I ran upstairs and saw that I luckily forgot to turn on the oven. DoubleDumbness saved the pizza :D
Edit: Sorry for grammar and/or spelling mistakes. I speak german. :)
LOL 😂
Ayukina GoT German? Daz nice
As someone who is trying to learn German as I have permanently moved to Austria, anyone who makes fun of a non-native speaker is a jerk!
😂😂
who the hell's oven is upstairs?
Whenever I hear someone walking behind me on the sidewalk, I look up and to the right to try to see them in the rearview mirror. It doesn’t work well without a car.
When I was a kid I thought the world used to be in black and white.
So did I! lol
What? why?
KaizerMan old movies were in black and white and I thought that's because that's what the world looked like back then.
Me too! I was about 7 when I asked my older sister if she was born when the world was still black and white 🙊
YUS ME TOO
"Do you even understand my life??"
This is still one of my fav moments from this show!! 😂 Gets me everytime!
me too! :)
Haha
Yep, I use to drive my truck to work everyday and then I drove my car one time and when I came out to the parking lot I thought someone had stolen my truck.
A friend once reported his car to the police as stolen. The next day he remembered it was on the next street.
Lol.
@@Tracymmo lol
Tony Bologna I freak out like that! When I park and can’t find my car 😂😂
I'm dumb - I waited several seconds in front of a 7-11 door waiting for it to open automatically
Lol.
I’ve done that at the exit door at stores lol!
When I was a child I legit thought that men who had a bald patch were all Jewish and it was because they wore kippas so often. xD
I'm also a Sims addict, so I have tried to press the 0 key before realizing this is real life, there is no keyboard for it and you can't pause it either...
I asked for a "McWhopper" instead of a Whopper Jr..
The funny part is she knew what I meant.
I was in college when I realized that the mom wasn't cheating on the dad in "I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus". #imdumb
carissa0503 me too!!!
Wait WHAT?!
carissa0503 literally just realised that now
Yeah, The Fresh Prince of Bel Air explained the reason for the song for me and it took a long time for me to figure that one out.
😆😆😆
Me greeting someone: "Hi! How are you?"
Person: "Good. How are you?"
Me: "Good. How are you?" 😑
#imdumb
I constantly do this at work.
Lol
Everyday. I usually cut myself or them off.
Hahahaaaa you're good, you said that 🤣😬🙄
they used my tweet!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm so stoked!! :D
+Paige Rook Not dumb. Just too polite.
Mama I made it!
lol
+Paige Rook which one was yours?
+Some Random Dude lol My bad. Figured it out
i once got spooked by my own reflection in the basement window.
sometimes ill get spooked by my reflection on the mirror.
+Matthew Lor me too
I've never been spooked by my reflection before, but from the look on her face I think I may have spooked my reflection once or twice...
same
Lol
I once looked into a pot of boiling water. When the steam fogged up my glasses. I panicked as I thought. What's wrong with my eyes?!!!!
I organized and now I can't find anything. #Imdumb
Abby Snyder
Omgggggggg I can’t tell you how many times I organize and loose everything!!
Actually i did that more than one time. That's why i don't organize nothing. Can never find it afterwards.
@@brittanyviebrock1651 me too. It sucks.
Bee is a pretzel I DO THAT 😂😩😂🤣
Shut up higgins! Every time he talk after a twet is like "omg again this man"
hahaha ikr
That's his job, that's what he is there for
There is funny Higgins and annoying Higgins.
You know you can fast forward anytime through the video.
+Thrasher_ 92 i think everyone prefer less dumb jokes and more funny tweets
I've never done any of these things. #ImSmart
R/iamsmart
Lol yup. Forgot hashtags don't recognize apostrophes.
#ImDumb
+Doug Jones Guess you just ruined your smart streak right there.
Pucadupr Haha it is now officially back to zero.
My mom once pulled into the wrong driveway. Twice. Lol.
she once did it twice?
I messed up on the wording lol. She pulled into the wrong driveway twice.
I was just playfully teasing :)
Are you stupid?
I do stuff like that on the regular I thought that’s normal :/
When I was little I thought that a serial killer was literally a cereal that comes out of the bowl and gets a knife and kills you😂😂🥣🥣
I stood at a stop sign, waiting to it to turn green.
OMG JUST READ THE TWEETS!
thank you
OMG JUST GO ON TWITTER AND READ THEM YOURSELF
+TurtleTitan4Evah boss!
+TurtleTitan4Evah You may be entertain by 5 year old follery, but the rest of us are not. Don't act like it's not annoying.
Lorisa214 Theyve always done this 😐 ... why are people all of a sudden shocked?😕 and Mr Turtle Titan 4 Evah (boss name) is right if you just want to read them go on his twitter and if you want to hear them have a friend read them to you😄... calling this five year old foolery is being silly and foolish😦
If youre a fan of fallon you should already know he is silly or cheesy and accept it however youre entitled to your opinion ☺
Went to school by bike, returned on foot. Took me two days to realise my bike was still there...
I once got a "happy birthday!" to which i replied "Thanks, You too!"
I love you and your show but just get on with the next oneee..
+Imoh Edet get that old guy out of the show..he aint funn
+Vuha Vuhu No he's funny + Johnny Carson had a guy like that the tonight show. Conan did that too...
IKR
+Kledisa hasa well...it tells a lot that...they only "had' and dont have currently :P
hanging on one hashtag comment for 2 minutes...i dunno hahah
ikr... whenever I see a 3+min long video on hashtags I'm like "okay... they are going to be doing stupid stuff nonstop..."
I used to think Olivia Newton John was actually "Olivia neutered John".
That sounds painful!
When I was a kid I thought Arnold Schwarzenegger's first name was "Aneshashenegah", or to make that more legible, "Ah-ne-sha-sheh-neh-gah". I was so shocked when I found out it was just Arnold.
total·sax·sap Wut??????
Radish Is Kool I think she means she thought Arnold Schwarzenegger's name was all the one name. But not sure
😆😆😆
When my brother was like 3or 4 my mom told him to tell our dad that Arnold Schwarzenegger was on TV. When my brother went up to my dad he said "daddy, you're an egg eater!!" And walked away. My dad was so confused.
I once waited behind a parked car to go. than my brother & I realized we are in the parking lane 😜
If I were the person waiting behind the mannequin I'd be more worried over the fact that they weren't moving...
+and-she-said-let-there-be-rock LOL
Its not that hard if you are with a family talking to them you probably won't look at mannequin. But 15 mins is bullshit
+and-she-said-let-there-be-rock Lol. And nice username and profile pic
+Chris Beaudoin
Not hard to believe when you just *know* he was staring at his phone.
+TacomaPaul who said anything about phones?
Sometimes I think if you don't laugh at every single joke they make you will be taken out of the audience xD
That Olivia Newton John one reminded me of when I was little I thought Jesus Mary and Joseph was Jesus's full name. LMAO!
Once I double tapped on a UA-cam video😂 #imdumb
Rice Gum u r not d only one😅
I double tap on Facebook all the time
Rice Gum thanks ifunny 😃😉
Once i used my fingers to zoom in on a youtube video. I wanted to get a better look at that youtubers face #ImDumb
I have done this so many times. 😂
my friend thought rain came from outer space. I thought when it rains, the whole world is raining.
A couple of years ago, still sleepy in the morning, after pouring myself a bowl of Cheerios, noticed something was a bit different from usual and realised I'd poured myself a bowl of cat biscuits (^_^;) #ImDumb
+sakuramari They probably tasted better. Cheerios are inedible in my opinion.
Angela Anuszewski LOL
I crack up every time Jimmy does the "do you even understand my life?" bit.
yeah, where is that from?
whom is jimmy impersonating ?
I know, its soooo funny 😂😂😂😂😋
Who is he imitating?
I love that bit he does. I laugh every time I see it.
When I was 7 or 8..
1. my older sister’s ADMIRER asked me to say “hi” to her for him.
I told my sister; “your REMINDER said hi”
2. My family was talking about my dad’s permanent visa and I asked them “what’s an eternal visa?” I remember choosing among the words eternal, forever and everlasting. Lol
Nooooooo that statue of liberty thing NOOOOOO you seriously don't get it.. they doooo. change hands cause.. where my Whovians at?!
right here
I blinked.
#whovian4life
here!
Got your back!
i thought mary kate and ashley were three different people too
They are actually just one person moving really quickly back and forth. John Oliver is really close to cracking the whole case wide open.
It's a TALK SHOW people.....of course they're going to do a lot of talking. 🙄
EXACTLY!!
Yeah but a talk show is generally about a host and guest TALKING not texts, so the inbetween bits are unnecessarily long
Kay Gideon oof gottem 👏🏻🙌🏻
@@D-Rock420 Ah, yes. When you had no way of reaching 911 unless there was a landline nearby. Ah, the good ol' days.
3:43 See, I went a different route: when I was a kid, I thought she was Olivia Newton-John because she had married her Grease co-star, John Travolta.
asterisk911
Aww that’s cute ☺️
It's hard to make me snap but... Can you two just shut up and read the tweets? Lol
It's better if you've been drinking. Lol
Someone please start a band and name themselves Olivia, Newt and John
I can't put into words how professional The Roots are. Been a fan since '97.
I LOVE the riffs!! Together with hearing random Quest-Love laughs is my favorite part of this show. Also funny how the camera guy zooms out for the imaginary stuff 😛
On the previous hashtag video, people were complaining that he skimmed through the hashtags and didn't take his time and now people are complaining about him going to slow. Can't satisfy everyone.
Well... there's an in between. Not too slow, not too fast. This one was definitely annoying.
+Ju M. No people just want to complain
+zomboobiez yeah, right. whatever you say
+Keandre Espina that's the point of a comment section.
Its youtube. full of ignorance
i yelled "SHUT UP, HIGGINS" a few times during this video. let jimmy talk. jesus..
+phil chao this must be your first time watching..
Their improv is top notch. So so good.
Actually, my brother always sings "Hey man" instead of "amen" when Take me to church sounds on the radio. I used to, too
Same
When I was younger I knew that my cat got bigger as she got older, I thought by the time she was 10 she would've turned into a tiger. hence, big cat.
Once i spend the entire day searching for my glasses when they where on my face the whole day #ImDumb
lol.. once happened with me to..
N your beautiful BTW..
An entire day? Wtf how is that even possible.
+mongoloid Dweller well it hardly took me 2 mins to realize..😂
Guess the only place you didn't look was the mirror haha
Carla V. Santos I did the samething today. A year after your post. I found them fast but, almost gouged my eye out. I reached too fast, lol... Ppl tell me to wear one of those "things" around my neck that hold a person's glasses on... aaah NØ! I just can't bring myself to wear one. Maybe in another 20yrs, lol 😎
I love Jimmy ❤ I have ever since seeing him on SNL. He always makes me laugh.
#ImDumb
I was so tired one time when I ran into a chair I said, "Oh, sorry!"
Then was laughed at by my friend for 10 minutes straight.
In elementary school, whenever the teacher said "hush", I would ask "who's hush?" Because I thought hush was a person.
First time I went to Trader Joes, I started checking out my items until a guy came up to me and asked if I needed help. I said "yeah I don't know what to do next", he said "we don't do self checkout here"... I was pretty embarrassed.
I know right! The Trader Joes checkout line is so weird looking, I've been there like 10 times and still don't really know what the hell to do. I just hope somebody else is checking out too and I just follow them.
Someone has said "have fun on vacation"and I would respond with "You too," even though they weren't going
I have caught myself blowing on my salad or cold food more than once thinking it was hot food!?!?
I love their sense of humour. They have an over active imagination me and my friends have the same humour. Glad to see alot of people have it and understand it.
Everybody complaining about the banter and jokes between Jimmy and Steve -
What would the bit be without that? All it would be is Jimmy reading things that other people wrote, not adding anything. What kind of bit would that be if the HOST OF THE SHOW just removed himself from the bit?
The bit is the tweets. No one cares about the banter.
+JAM F It's an opinion just like yours, man. We're in the same boat. Why try to start something? Lol
Samuel Irvin Totally agree.
Banter is okay
Too much isn't👌
When my nephew was in like 5th or 6th grade writing a book report or some shit and he asked my sister “Mom how do you spell US as in USA”
I was a host at a restaurant and instead of saying "hi how are you guys doing?" I said "Hi what would you like to drink!"
"Shut up read the tweets, and don't say anything after, just make it boring as possible"
+Matt Holub Im pretty sure he was being sarcastic.
You can always fast forward on UA-cam. Remember that
Not sure who will read this, but I played a mean prank on my brother once when I was in second grade (he is 3 years younger than me). We had gone to see The Lion King musical at the Pantages Theater in LA and I told my brother that the actor who played Mufasa literally died every single time they had a showing, so they had to get a new actor to play him for every new showing. I think I told him the truth later that night, but he still hasn't forgiven me to this day haha.
barbaro267 Hahahahaha that's terrible, but hilariously clever
I feel like my sister would do that to me
/r/thathappened
barbaro267 what this actual hell. You again?
barbaro267 That was a long way to go, for something so unfunny.
NO ONE’S TALKING ABOUT THOSE SOUND EFFECTS?? THAT’S SO COOL LMAO
One day I was in the Grocery Store and a carton of orange juice said no concentrate and I said, "Well duh orange juice isn't made of concrete."
I once opened the dishwasher before it was done. It started beeping at me loudly and I said sorry. It was as if I'd walked in on someone!
Here's a tip for y'all: hover your mouse cursor over the progress bar and skip to whenever the Twitter quotes are actually seen. No one will blame ya :)
that's what I do :p
I'm on tablet. 😩
+Ace in the Hole drag the button then, the screen will change
Shy Girl But my screen is so small and hard to work with. I just suffer through it.
Idk if its because im pregnant and my emotions are all crazy, but the mannequin one made me laugh so hard I started crying for 10min.
My sister used to think the song Constant Cravings was actually God Bless Gravy
I don't know if this was just me bbbuuttt when I was little I thought the alphabet went.. "abcdefghijk elemeno pqrstuvwxyz" oops. Lol
Me too
+YouAreLiveIn321 hahahaha thanks for sharing
I did too, and my preschool teacher made me fail the alphabet and thought I was retarded
Omg!! That's funny... and terrible! :')
"HIJK en-o-men-o P"
When I was young, I thought that color was invented during the making of Wizard of Oz.
When I was little, I thought the states were separate countries and I'm from Michigan, when we were stopping at a gas station in Ohio and went in there to get snacks, I was surprised when the cashier spoke English so I asked my dad, "Wait, Ohionans speak English?" He said, "Yeah" and I said, "So every country in the world speaks English now?" And he said, "No." and I said, "But we're in Ohio." And he said, "Well, Ohio isn't a separate country." And the cashier was just laughing the entire time. #ImDumb
Also I used to think Washington DC was located in the state of Washington lol #ImDumb
Oh I Still think that I’m like DC IS ON THE WEST COAST RIGHT
I used to think the bare naked ladies were three naked lady bears
how does Higgins make those noises ?? 😂😂
He's actually too talented, I enjoy his contribution to the show!
+jrms2589 yh
Idk. Btw, I love your UA-cam pic :3
That's happened before at the mall; I've ran into a mannequin and thought it was a person (and apologized) ; 2-3x , lol !! Terrible thing to admit in person ! 😂😂
wondering what he looked like, then I realised he looked like ted from himym
My friend ran into a trashcan while we were walking and i watched him turn to it, apologize, and then keep walking with me.