Tom listed plenty of valid reasons to break up with Ariana. He listed zero valid reasons for cheating on her with her best friend behind her back for a year.
Absolutely...and I think he said several times he shouldn't have cheated. He did not handle this well at all but he is human and many people have made this awful choice
Spot on, and that is the part that it doesn’t matter all of the reasons he wanted to break up with her. I don’t care, agreed your relationship was not perfect if you were cheating. But that’s where you suck it up buttercup and you don’t try to get it your way all the way. Because let’s be honest, that’s what he was trying to do either he was trying to do this when they wouldn’t film, or he was trying to be clever to get her off of the house before he broke it up with her. I think he is a slimeball, he’s proved that before this, this just tops the sliminess.
Right!?!?! She trusted him and Rachel and will probably now have a hard time trusting anyone in her life going forward all because of him. And he doesn’t even care what he’s done. It’s all her fault. SCUMBAG
Him accusing her of both emotional and physical abuse on this forum (a podcast) is AWFUL! I’m looking forward to the record being set straight on that. 🤦♀️
he's so self interested... He could do whatever he wanted but Ariana, I bet she couldn't.. And when she did Tom always wanted his name on it. "Ariana doesn't kiss my ass so... Lemme find a lackey stan." I don't use this term lightly because it's over used but Narcassist.... who finds himself needing to gaslight to appear more innocent and save his "image" and it wouldn't surprise me if he turned into a men's rights activist. He does things for his own ego.
Howie interrupted his daughter at every opportunity. Why have her as a co-host if you’re only interested in hearing yourself talk? She was clearly better prepared to run this discussion as a fan of the show; Howie should have taken a back seat.
Howie’s daughter is married to the drummer/manager of Tom’s band. This is exactly how this interview is supposed to go… to try give him a chance to look good so it wouldn’t mess up Howie’s daughter’s husband’s band’s success. It’s intentionally bad interviewing and compromises the integrity of this podcast and Howie’s image.
@@cristinamariacabral-corby9684 WOW! Thank you so much for filling me in! Talk about Nepo baby privilege!!!! Hope Howie lost his audience if this is the lazy faux journalism he wants to have on his podcast.
Exactly..once a cheat, always a cheat. If you develop a relationship with someone who is already in a relationship, don’t be surprised when it happens again. Growing apart does happen. Tom didn’t break up with Ariana because the excitement came from the sneaking around. This interview was disgusting. Offering Excuses and acceptance of Tom’s vile behavior shows who Howie truly is.
I feel like he was feigning ignorance. He’s either that lazy not to prep on a guest or has little respect for his audience that he’s willing to provide such half assed interview because he knows it’ll get views. Either way I’m not impressed.
Just because Howie wasn’t on the bandwagon to destroy Tom like many of y’all are doing doesn’t mean he held a poor interview. This is someone who has a personal relationship with Tom rather than us who have a para social relationship with him. Howie did a great job by not allowing the pressure of these bravo fans get to him, he was unbiased, and created room for Grace from human to human. Many people are so quick to discard this man and that’s ridiculous. Look at this contextually and not just off the surface. Ariana and Tom’s relationship sounded insufferable.
@@bltpod don’t disagree about para-relationships but turning up to work and effectively saying “I don’t have a clue what’s going on but let’s have a chat about whatever” is poor show for anyone. It’s insulting to his viewers. The relationship sounded insufferable from one side & ironically the scenario with Raquel is exactly the same thing he did with Kristen. Friendship, stolen kisses etc. Tom could’ve been anyone but Mandel needs to not waste his audience’s time if can’t be bothered to do minimum research.
@@amalali504 I think Howie came into it with a clear head and wanted to be informed along the way by the very man himself being interviewed. He doesn't need to watch VPR to feel "prepared" for this interview when the person there can literally walk him through the real life situation. I don't think it's insulting at all. I think people are trying to find more ways to discredit Howie and this is the lowest-hanging fruit to do so. It's just silly.
@@bltpod You seem to project a lot on Howie & your argument is a strawman’s. He doesn’t need to have watched VPL to not know that Arianna & Raquel were very close which may’ve put context into reason for the “Hoopla”. As an interviewer you prep so you know the situation & can ask informative & thoughtful questions that really add colour to a situation however controversial. As an interviewer you should have the ability to challenge & examine to get to the matter. Howie gets paid handsomely for his Podcast. He can’t short change his loyal viewers & not expect feedback. He needs to do better regardless of who’s interviewing because this was very poor indeed & not because he didn’t give Sandorval a hard time. I didn’t tune in for an annihilation session but for a balanced, truthful exchange. There are plenty of great podcasts out there & only so much time for us to listen & this was a waste of my time so has me pissed. You’re entitled to you opinion.
It's funny that he claims he had such a difficult time breaking up with Ariana because she was "in denial" and "threatened to self sabotage". Yet when she figured out about his affair with Raquel, she broke it off IMMEDIATELY. Which just proves that had she known the truth from the start, it would have resulted in the end of the relationship. So gross that he forced her to go to couples therapy and only talked in "hypothetical" terms when he was actively being unfaithful ..
According to him, he did break up with her and she wouldn't stop. He said they were done by the time she found out. She didn't break it off immediately, it was already done but she stopped trying to win him back the moment she found out he had been with raquel.
She is just one of them good women who trusted her spouse. And was trying to keep her mental together and didn't realize he was "distant" I don't understand how even if they were living "separate lives " he was living with her being disrespectful. Your supposed to break up first and then you can talk to someone like this isn't hard
Hopefully we get that with Andy at the reunion! I feel like Tom agreed to go on this podcast because he felt safe and he wouldn’t get hard questions. And he still ended up looking like a total narcissistic douche.
So many missed opportunities to ask relevant questions, and Howie cutting off his daughter at every opportunity and not finding anything wrong with how Tom handled this is just disgusting.
His daughter wasn’t trying to even hear the context and give that some understanding yet she was loyal to trying to tear Tom down and that’s unfair. Howie sounded like a sensible person who had a sound conversation that was not blindly impacted by reports unlike his daughter who sounded like a crazed fan.
I’m just trying to imagine Howie justifying this if it was his own daughter this was happening to. Would that guy be “super nice and talented” still?? This is bulls***
This is the short of it: Tom turned 40. He panicked because he’s getting older, real life is setting in, he’s not as attractive as he once was, he’s not as fun as he once was, the same things that used to make him happy and/or excited don’t anymore. He’s looking for an escape from his reality. In comes Rachel. The young, fun, new, exciting single girl that is giving Tom all the attention he so desperately needs. Classic narcissist. She feeds his ego and thinks he’s the best thing since sliced bread. This makes Tom’s brain feel really good, releasing dopamine, etc which is making him believe he’s in love with Rachel. This is called limerence. Tom’s brain is acting that of a child. One day he will wake up when the pattern with Rachel repeats. If he doesn’t get a grip on his mental health and the reason he is acting like this, he will continue to repeat the pattern. Thinking he’s found his true love of his life, reality sets in, his wandering eye is awaken, he cheats, and moves on to the next girl. Wake up, Tom! He honestly might have borderline personality disorder, but definitely Peter Pan Syndrome!
Sandoval chose this platform on purpose. He knew dang well he wouldn't be properly grilled and skewered like he should have been. This was a total joke.
If the content of the podcast itself wasn’t bad enough, the production of this is atrocious. If he thought this was a good idea, he is going to be VERY disappointed.
Because he is a human and made a mistake lime 50% of people in marriages. The reason he explained is bc people want to know how he felt and what transpired up to the affair.
Exactly... FUCK YOU, Howie!!! This is such crap and entirely unfair to others who suffer from mental health issues who do step forward and take accountability.
Mansplaining? Stop with the labels. What did you want him to say? It's obvious it was wrong but figuring out how it happened this way makes actual sense. You can actually not condone cheating but also understand why it occurred. It's not mutually exclusive.
@@jenniferwasko4540 thank you! Everybody is on here quickly destroying Tom and not even considering the mental anguish he experienced while being with Ariana who threatened to end her life if he leaves her. If a man threatened to end his life to stop his girl from breaking up with her, we would immediately bash him for that.
It is absolutely not the ending of the relationship that is worse, it’s the affair because now everyone feels betrayed, lied, & manipulated to say the least
They way Tom tries to remain calm and articulate and then you see his true emotion come out in spurts of temper tantrums and hysterics of believing he truly is the victim before he catches himself and goes back to playing it cool is definitely something they study in psychology classes
My opinion I don't think she was ever ever A TRUE FRIEND not at all I think she was jealous of her life and relationship and he fell for it because he wasn't getting anything I'm sorry not sorry .. for her to continue to rub it in Ariana's face by sleeping with gim in there hone still is beyond DISGUSTING 🔥😡 she didn't care who she hurt or playing the villain would get her her ten minutes of attention... " HOW DID THAT GO GIRL ..… this is so childish Ariana is so right just overgrown CHILDREN .. keep shining ARIANA 🌟💎🌟💜♾️☮️💜🥰😘🤗 can't wait to see your first movie ... Your beautiful inside and out girl ... BIG BIG HUGS 🤗😘💜💜💜💜🌺🍀💋💋💋
Ya . A victim gets to go on Broadway for being cheated on . I never got to go on Broadway for being cheated on when I was pregnant with my child when my ex cheated on me 🙄 What a great example 🙄
Wow, what a thrilling interview! Even with a generous interviewer like Howie, Sandoval still managed to dig himself deeper in his hole full of excuses and delusion. My heart breaks for Ariana who had to hear him say all this about her after everything he put her through. He and Rachel deserve each other!
Why are we disregarding the fact that Raquel was great friends with Ariana?! Completely being underplayed. So bizarre to take this stance without wanting to know the whole story, Howie.
you are so right. how did they go through the entire interview without the daughter, who is very familiar with the full story, discussing the best friend betrayal aspect?? Howie kept saying he didn’t understand what the big deal is about, his daughter KNOWS but never mentions it. My guess is that Tom must have made avoiding that aspect a condition of his appearance on the podcast. Agreeing to do the show as long as that part is not brought up. it’s the only logical explanation
the guy who lied to his girlfriend about his whereabouts (bc he was cheating) when she called distraught by her GRANDMOTHER dying? he’s commendable?? he’s all good??? wow. literally disgusting
What Adriana said in the finale was The best assessment of who Rachel is. This girl has no identity she’s looking for her identity in men. Something to that effect. Smartest line I’ve heard in reality tv. Adriana is smart and beautiful and will have her next act. I thought they should’ve separated when she didn’t want to have kids and he wanted to be a father. Best wishes to all in the situation!
This whole podcast is Tom trying to justify his actions and it’s absolutely sickening. There is nothing that he can say that makes what he and Rachel did OK. It’s insane.
And also Howie trying to stick up for Tom, and cut his daughter off and interrupt constantly when she was trying to say the RIGHT time to get out was the second he got feelings for Rachel.
How he is only looking at it as a man cheating on his girlfriend and not everything that's tied around it like Raquel and Ariana being friends and Ariana being there for retail or the fact that Schwartz had a crush on Raquel while Tom was screwing her and didn't know it. This is so much more than just someone cheating on someone
@@imcharmed4evrSandoval and Rachel trigger us all. Tom does the same thing in all his relationships, which is tell the new girl how she is so special and so different than his current gf...gaslighting the current gf about how their relationship is so bad, after he's been unfaithful multiple times and has moved on with someone new already. Arianna thought she was special, and different. Then Rachel thought she was special and different, because that's what he told her. But the difference is Rachel didn't think people were going to find out till they planned, and she wanted Arianna's popularity, fame, and her life. She sees women as competition. She never thought people would care, and saw no difference in what they were doing, anymore than James and Lala hooking up. 9 years of basically a marriage, may as well be 2 weeks.
This man is so delusional. Did he think he’d get on this podcast and stutter through his bullshit indignations and think people were going to believe this? Even *if* this were true, he takes zero accountability and still places the entire blame on Ariana. He makes her out to look like she was near a psychotic break. This narcissist is trying to gaslight us all into thinking he’s the victim. Throw the whole man away.
Tom was unhappy in his relationship with Ariana and he felt trapped. There was no romance or intimacy left in their relationship. However, Tom should have broken up with Ariana a long time ago.
#Scandoval thing is huge because it brings Season 1 - 10 to a full circle. Sandoval + Kristen. Kristen + James. James + Raquel. Raquel + Sandoval. Bizarre
Not to mention that Sandoval not only paid but also planned and set up the Coachella location for James to propose to Raquel!!! So many layers of weird.
What gets me is Ariana saw Tom was willing to cheat on Kristen with her and then admits she knew he slept with Miami girl but went out of her way to lie in order to protect Tom (or her ego as Kristen was right) so she saw red flags early on.
Exactly. She def wanted to show that she was it for him. The cast has mentioned before how they were totally different behind cameras. I def believe Tom when he mentioned her saying that she wasn’t letting him breakup with her
@Name she admitted it when he was talking to her 1on1 and reminded her that he tried to break up with her and she threatened to kill herself. Instead of denying it or calling him a liar she said "then you should have left". For years she talked about being suicidal on the show so she was emotionally blackmailing him. Tom is no Saint. I'm not even a fan of his but it makes me sick to see people pretending Ariana is some God incapable of being flawed like the rest of us. I remember the backlash when she insulted half the country by bashing Republicans and virtue signaling about "don't slut shame" only to slut shame Miami Girl, Kristen and Rachel.
Because she got the Sandoval treatment- "you're nothing like my gf, you are so special, I've never felt like this with anyone..." So Rachel thought the same thing, with the bonus of seeing the life her friend had, that was going to be hers.
As horrible as all of this was, they did Ariana the biggest favor. She is going to be able to go on and get the love and appreciation she truly deserves. Sandoval is and always has been a dirtbag of a person. Wish him and Raquel the worst. ❤🥰
I think the larger issue is that Rachel was super close to Ariana and that’s why this is larger than life. It’s incomprehensible. People cheat, I’ve fallen for a married man and I’m not saying I was right, but the fact the 3 of them were friends and she was taken under Ariana’s wing is why this is so heartbreaking to people.
My thoughts exactly...I wished the daughter would've done a better job when it came down to asking the questions since she actually watch the show and know who the cast are
How this guy didn’t bother to binge watch season 10 for the interview is beyond. I had to sacrifice two days worth of my life to get myself up to date for scandoval.
Sandoval saying he is proud of Schwartz for hurting Katie by doing the one thing, the only thing she asked him to respect "please don't hook up with someone in the friend group."That tells me everything about his character....he has none.
Oh my gosh you're the first comment I've came across that has said that I have been thinking that the whole time I've been watching this!!!!!!! The only reason a man would talk that way about an affair is if he has justify having his own affairs. 100% believe he's cheated multiple times
People like him are always delusional. They will always be the hero or the victim and never the villain. And everyone else just won’t “get it”. They should study people who cheat mainly in situations like these and have very little to no actual remorse.
The level of disrespect to Ariana is mind boggling. The fact he can sit here and speak so highly of Rachel and talk so much shit about Ariana while blaming her for everything is disgusting.
Saying to Arianna, “ I don’t think I can be faithful with you” while he’d been cheating behind her back for MONTHS, says it all. The gaslighting Arianna, the blaming her depression and their lack of sex, complaining about her personality and lack of attention…..Arianna is right- he IS a toddler. No accountability, no honor, no maturity, and honestly he deserves to be cancelled. He created this mess, let him lie in it.
He’s a narcissist. He’s playing the victim. He didn’t even apologize at all to her at first when he wrote his sad excuse of an apology. And news flash to Tom: maybe she was depressed and didn’t fck u because you’re a pos and your behavior has always been such a turn off. My ex despised my depression and anxiety and he was abusive af. When he left jr magically disappeared.
No one will understand Tom unless you're trapped in a sex-less relationship (lacking connection for years) for a while. Raquel became his fountain of joy and a jolt to his spine. He deserves to be happy!
@@ctc6960 I agree but this wasn’t the way to do it. He is wrong Af. And he is a liar. He even admitted to her changinf and was so sweet and amazing. He’s a pos. If you haven’t watched every season you’d know why this isn’t like any other cheating scandal. This man is a manipulative narcissist and he displays the textbook symptoms MANY times over the years. He’s awful. If I was Ariana I would be so turned off and depressed too witb him. That’s what many fail to realize, with toxic dudes like this you don’t realize it in the moment, but they get you to that point. Myself and many other men/women who’ve been thru these type of relationships say they same. We leave and it’s like our problems go away. We are happier, we have those spicy feelings again, anxiety goes away. It’s incredible how it works.
Jackelyn staring at her dad with a look of "Hmmm is my dad being misogynistic right now?...do I try to correct him or just nod because he won't get it?" is so relateable lol
Does Tom not realize he’s basically describing every single mid life crisis anybody has ever had? He’s such a narcissistic cliche and instead of just having the balls to break up with her he basically blames her for not catching on to his hints?
Taking her to "couples counseling" to break up with her, is manipulative AF! Going to counseling infers you want things to get BETTER. He basically "led her on" for months, secretly hoping the therapist would do the breaking up for them (for him).
ok what we're NOT going to do is make Tom some victim here. The unhinged delusion in this interview is honestly staggering and the doubling down makes him actually look worse if that's possible
So according to Howie, it's totally ok to cheat on your partner as long as it's because you were going through a midlife crisis, since y'know they weren't married. Even though they had been together for 10 years and owned a house together. Cool. Good to know.
He's unhinged. This wasn't even an interview. He never once said "Maybe she cares that it wasn't just ONE mistake but went on for 7+ months with her best friend".......
Echoing what everyone has already said - Tom is a narcissist. What’s crazy is throughout this entire interview, he did not apologise to Ariana or express genuine remorse once. Nor did he express any physical signs of emotion or regret. Claiming he loves & cares for her but demonises & blames her. Also, at no point in time did he take accountability for how he contributed to the demise of their relationship. Did he fulfil her needs? Was he attentive? He loves deflecting blame. Incredibly disappointed with Howie too. He spent the entire interview justifying Tom’s behaviour and barely asked any relevant questions. He also did not challenge Tom. Wish Howie’s daughter was able to run this episode or perhaps she should start her own podcast where she has more autonomy.
@@MrsK976 what part of centring themselves as the victim in every version of events they share, deflecting blame onto other people, failing to apologise and dodging accountability for their wrongs makes them NOT a narcissist?
@@A-ze4vh he apologized and said it was wrong to cheat. He said it several times in this podcast alone. So how can you see he was “failing to apologize.” Did you even listen to the podcast? He certainly apologized and said it was wrong numerous times. A narc wouldn’t even do that. He deserves to be happy. Arianna would never have made him happy. She ignored him in marriage, children and intimacy. What type of partner is that????? Not a partner at all.
@@MrsK976 I’m not sure what kind of expectations and standards you have, but the mere act of “apologising” does not imply remorse. People apologise all the time or make an outward acknowledgement of wrongdoing (as Tom clearly did in this case) without being sincere. It is clear that Tom spent more time critiquing all of Ariana’s ‘flaws’ rather than taking any personal accountability (such as how he contributed to the tension in their relationship). His acknowledgement that it is “wrong to cheat” is not an impressive threshold to meet, in fact, it is the bare minimum. Plenty of narcissistic people apologise to save face also (hence not being sincere) and Tom has clearly recognised his businesses are at risk. Your commentary on Ariana not being a suitable partner because she ignored him in regards to intimacy and children also clearly shows your bias towards Tom and your illogical defence of him. Whatever the state of their relationship, he had 9 years to decide to leave if he was not happy. Any issues on her end also does not excuse the cheating and deception that was at play.
Jax went to every reunion he ever participated in saying he was “sorry” and was changing his life to become a better person and then would show up to the next reunion the same and spitting the same garbage. He was definitely a narcissist and even agreed that he was a narcissist- he’s the only case study in this group of friends you need to observe to see the truth. Tom has taken from his playbook multiple times but goes about it more smoothly
@@pamelav4861 he said he doesn’t see anything wrong with what happened, doesn’t see what all the fuss is about, and made Tom the victim in the situation.
I get it. People grow apart. They meet other people and go their own ways. The part I will never understand is the bold face lying to everyone’s faces and to the fans. That just speaks so badly of Tom’s and Rachel’s characters/reputations. Stop blaming Ariana for your failures, Tom. It’s YOUR fault. And for lort’s sake, don’t give yourself applause for your performance. Nobody wants to hear that.
I don't think Tom is disgusting. I think he felt trapped and didn't know what to do with Ariana. Like he said, they were business partners, a brand and on VPR together. They own a home together. They are stuck in this house together, right now, which is horrible.
LOL I’m cringing this whole interview because Howie was CLEARLY the wrong person to have this conversation. He doesn’t know anything! And he’s defending Sandoval while knowing nothing! Genius idea
It’s really not that hard to figure out what happened here. Tom started going through a midlife crisis and felt like he was getting old and didn’t have all the things that he had dreamed he would have. So he started looking outside of the relationship for validation, thinking the grass would be greener elsewhere. Ariana sensed a disconnect and started pulling away from him, intimately, because she’s probably like a lot of women who need to feel super connected and super understood to be able to have sex. Then he got even more frustrated and started focusing on sex sex sex. Then Raquel comes along, this hot little groupie, who was able to give his ego everything it needed, including the sex he clearly was obsessing over. The really sad part of all this is, building a relationship upon a foundation of lies is a death sentence. Ultimately, Tom will end up single, middle-aged, wishing he could go back in time and have done things completely differently. Even if Raquel and him manage to somehow make this last for a little while, and have a baby or get married or whatever, the way that this relationship started is unsustainable, and they will never have a foundation of respect and trust which are crucial for any long-term commitment. Tale as old as time. I feel sorry for him because he really did dig his own grave here and karma is going to be a a huge bitch to him in the end.
OK. My best friend did this to me. It was horrible. It was humiliating and the whole experience just gutted me. They went on to date for YEARS and YEARS and I used to see him with other girls all the time. He was a serious womanizer. Now, YEARS later, I see that God did me a huge favor by removing these two horrible people from my life. Ariana will eventually be happy again and we will see what happens with Tom and Raquel.
I think this is best for everyone, instead of crucifying all these people, let’s support them as individuals. They know it was shitty. I think that’s very clear he was trying to end it without hurting her, their brands, etc. I think this was a good interview and people need to chill out. My god.
Howie "I'm not condoning cheating on your partner" No!.. just excusing it, downplaying it, and justifying it. But God forbid if you condone it. Am I in the f#*!ing twilight zone here? Dafuq?
I NEEDED Jackie to ask Scandoval "Was Raquelle the only person you cheated on Arianna with??" - I certainly hope hope hope that Andy Cohen asked that at the Reunion. Listening to this interview was like listening to my ex-husband. The narcissism is astounding. I can't imagine how low Scandoval feels, but I can tell you for a FACT that the pain Arianna is experiencing is 10x worse.
Girl, have you not watched the show? Ariana was the other woman and Tom cheated on her right away with “Miami girl” - that’s why I have no sympathy for her. 😹 Only thing I feel for her is the fact that he did this with her best friend who she trusted.
Out of Tom Sandavol, Howie, and Jackie...Jackie is the only one that comes across as likable and having common sense. Sandavol's ego and Howie's kiss ass questions and overall lack of understanding of the show makes this interview basically unlistenable.
The reason why this blew up so much is because of the friendship between the girls. Raquel being around Ariana constantly, going on trips, girls night out all while she was sleeping with Tom. Yes there was cheating in the past but they were hook ups not affairs
I'd like to know what Rachel's dad's thoughts are. He had such strong opinions about that a**hole James, so I would like to hear him discuss the whole season regarding his daughter. I bet she's made her dad proud.
Leave Raquel alone ! She was with A..hole James. Raquel was doing her.. still learning life. Ariana always stated she wants nothing physical, including having children. Tom always stated that was what he needed & Ariana always shut him down. I'm on Tom & Raquel's side.
Knowing he “kissed” Rachel in Mexico and then gaslit everyone who questioned him at Rachel’s bday camping trip about them sneaking around together makes me feel a certain type of way about it. If u had been up front and honest from the jump maybe there would have been a different reaction.
As someone who has watched VPR since the beginning... This is just a broken record. It's not the first time he paints his girlfriend as crazy and how unhappy he is to excuse his cheating. He left Kristen for Ariana and is now doing it to Ariana with Rachel.
Literately. I have the older seasons playing now. Even with Miami Girl how she described their night was her and Tom talked all night, he was sweet and they ended up kissing and then some. Sound familiar? Said the same thing about Ariana and now he's saying the same thing about Rachel. Scheana even said how good of a liar he is and though he always told Jax to grow up.... he's literally acting like Jax.
Relationship lacks intimacy so the next step is OBVIOUSLY to cheat on your 9 year long girlfriend with her bff for months instead of just breaking up 💀
So frustrating that when Howie asked why there was so much backlash about this affair, no one said it was partly because he cheated with his partner’s best friend! UGH
@@Bota29ayoalso it sounds like he escaped his own negative feelings about his life through the thrill of new affection connection etc. the issue is internal and isn’t going to be solved with a new person. That’s a pattern with a lot of cheaters. Trying to solve internal issues through using people.
Howie excusing away tom’s behavior - particularly when his daughter pointed out Tom should have ended the relationship before the affair and Howie makes a case for how he couldn’t - makes me think Howie is a self absorbed cheater himself. Like gets like lol.
I never thought I’d wind up in a situation like this- Ive worked too hard for my image, business, integrity… everything. Note the order of importance of the things he worked hard on and the total absence of Ariana or the relationship in that list
Howie, always the voice of reason. He made a mistake and the hatred has been beyond ridiculous. I think the post has been awesome. You treated him with a respect that he isn’t receiving very often these days. And, of course, you always place the importance on mental health above all. And I think Tom needed to hear that I always love you. And , this just made me love you more! So glad I found your podcast ☮️🙏❤️
Also the fact that they are downplaying the fact that this wasn’t just a “random hook up”. This was a full blown love affair with Rachel and Tom BEHIND Ariana’s back. They both lied to Ariana and I can’t wait to see the rest of the show.
I agree, I feel bad for Ariana she stuck up for Raquel over and over again on the show and now people are watching it knowing about the 8 month affair behind her back... It's such a horrible situation to put someone in
I agree. Rachel and Tom have now scared Adriana terribly! It is very cruel. He should've broken up with her years ago if he was that unhappy. Either way, he's a Liar and a Cheater. I have lost ALL respect. No one thinks he's done the right thing...and rem how down on Jax he was over same thing! I do. Jeckle.
It is infuriating that Howie keeps praising Tom for being "open" about his issues. If Howie knew anything about the show he might understand that Tom is only being "open" in an attempt to manipulate the audience, apportion blame to Ari and push his narrative. His oh so familiar narrative, which he already used when he broke up with Kristen. In both situations he said that the relationship was no longer intimate and that they had become like roommates,living separate lives. Howie says he doesn't need to be familiar with the show to interview Tom and that just shows how utterly, frustratingly, ignorant he is of the whole situation. Tom couldn't have chosen a better interviewer! He totally fell for Tom's story. He also aides Tom by completely minimising the seriousness of Tom and Ariana's relationship . Who cares that they weren't legally married? They were in a de-facto relationship and owned a house together.If Howie knew the background, he might have pointed out that maybe the reason Ari seemed oblivious to Tom's affair, or the fact he was pulling away, was because she was grieving the loss of both Charlotte and her grandmother.As Howie was clueless he was unable to challenge Tom at all. Instead, Tom's version of events went completely unchallenged !
Tom’s drummer and manager is married to Howie’s podcast producer… it’s not coincidence this is the first interview he chooses. He probably picked the questions 🙄
I wish he would just be 100% accountable for cheating & being a coward by hurting Ariana. No matter what, relationships go through ebs & flows. That is not an excuse to cheat. No one discusses the fact that alcohol is a major factor in this show in general as well as the decisions HE made as well as Raquel. The history of this show & the "bad" decisions these ppl make are centered around ample amounts of alcohol.
Now I know why Tom chose Howie's platform to tell his side...bc of the prior relationship AND Howie is literally OK with how things went down so Tom KNEW he would get sympathy and validation....MAKES SENSE NOW!
I think it says a lot about him that he keeps referencing his brand, or that he didn’t expect this to blow up so much. He’s honestly enjoying the fame, he’s always wanted it.
Wow…. I feel like I’m back to hearing the narrative from my cheating, narcissistic, gaslighting, manipulative ex husband.. Ariana.. it beyond indescribable the pain you go through… but this is the best thing to happen to finally get you out.
Being in a relationship for 12 years (and not married), the most heartbreaking thing to hear is that he wanted to do therapy AFTER he knew the relationship had no hope. Why not bring these issues to face before throwing away a relationship, partnership and friendship.
yeh and going to break up with her IN therapy. dude, what was that easier than a court order or something? Talking about her being in denial- then leave dude! Leave, pack your shit and go. Tom is such a joke!
Exactly. He already did Rachel in his backyard while Ariana was inside sleeping. To give her hope while he is sewing his oats through his midlife crisis is disgusting. If the grass is greener on the other side, water your own f'ing lawn!!
Howie is so biased it’s disgusting he should really watch the show and understand Tom and Ariana’s relationship. if this was his daughter I’m sure he would think differently of it
He only cared about his "image" and his "brand". This is not a man, he is a little boy that is not capable of taking ANY responsibility for his horrible and destructive actions. I can not say that I am surprised that he is shifting so much blame to Ariana and is making himself out to be a victim by saying that he was in a very sad and dark place and was trapped... Poor f*cking baby unable to make big boy decisions like ending a relationship and not continuously lying to someone that he claims was his best friend and always had his back! I hope we never have to see this pathetic mand child again.
Let’s not act like Ariana didn’t care about her image. Jax said 3 years ago their relationship wouldn’t last & they were more friends than anything. They also hid any problems.
I can’t with this guy. If they weren’t getting along, not spending time together, he lost his mojo or what the fuck ever - then break up with her!! Breaking up with someone doesn’t require 2 people. The other person doesn’t have to grant you permission. You decide and then your actions match it. This is exactly what he did to Kristin. He can’t stand to be alone so he lets relationships drag on until he finds someone else.
I can’t imagine being in the spotlight or being in a situation where every move you make on a show is analyzed. I grew up before social media and I will forever be grateful for that!!! 🙌🏼😂 However.. Tom has NEVER admitted to making mistakes unless he’s been confronted with something he’s done wrong. He also constantly makes excuses for his actions.. it’s bullshit at the end of the day!! He cheated on Kristen and then Ariana.. he needs to just get himself in check!
i think the primary issue here that’s not been spoken on……. feels like tom literally does not understand the difference between love and infatuation….. you didn’t love raquel. you were infatuated with her.
He is so undeserving of any sympathy. His actions were inexcusable and disgusting. The reality of the situation is is that he is a narcissistic serial cheater.
This is so crazy to watch in the wake of the last episode before the finale, when we saw Rachel confronting Ariana about how she should want to have sex with Tom and questioning whether she’s even attracted to him. To hear the situation spoken about so casually is insane, as if it wasn’t a calculated, vindictive betrayal.
Men lie to women. Sandy would have told rachel a right load of codswallop, about Ariana, and rachel so naive she trusts his word. "My wife doesn't understand me!"
Also, notice he lies that all they did was kiss that first time. We now know they had sex in the car while Ariana was in the house and then he rang the bell for Ariana to let him in.
How do you know what he was feeling and thinking?!! Come on stop hating on this guy so much. You act like no one ever makes the same mistake twice! It doesn't make him a horrible person, he just made a horrible mistake.
So it’s okay for Ariana and her friends to talk about it. But he can’t! I bet everything he said is true. The only thing he is guilty of is NOT ending the relationship!! I’m sure it was already over!!
That’s what I was thinking. He’s navigate for mental health. Where was Tom losing his mental health? What he did to Ariana was awful for her. And how dare he say Raquel is hot. Her cringe. He voice that sounds like her vocal cords are inflamed, and on fire is awful. Oh, and the phone ringing in the middle of the interview how classless
Tom listed plenty of valid reasons to break up with Ariana. He listed zero valid reasons for cheating on her with her best friend behind her back for a year.
Absolutely...and I think he said several times he shouldn't have cheated. He did not handle this well at all but he is human and many people have made this awful choice
Right?! He didn't make one mistake. He made a mistake everytime he crossed the line with Raquel!
Spot on, and that is the part that it doesn’t matter all of the reasons he wanted to break up with her. I don’t care, agreed your relationship was not perfect if you were cheating. But that’s where you suck it up buttercup and you don’t try to get it your way all the way. Because let’s be honest, that’s what he was trying to do either he was trying to do this when they wouldn’t film, or he was trying to be clever to get her off of the house before he broke it up with her. I think he is a slimeball, he’s proved that before this, this just tops the sliminess.
100% it’s ok that he wanted the relationship to end but how can the interviewers and Tom NOT see what’s so messed up here
@lori martin which is fine - but you don’t cheat with one of her best friends
him blaming her for not noticing as if she shouldn’t trust the person she’s been with for a decade is DISGUSTING.
Right!?!?! She trusted him and Rachel and will probably now have a hard time trusting anyone in her life going forward all because of him. And he doesn’t even care what he’s done. It’s all her fault. SCUMBAG
Him accusing her of both emotional and physical abuse on this forum (a podcast) is AWFUL! I’m looking forward to the record being set straight on that. 🤦♀️
Came here to say the same thing , this guy sucks
100%
Gaslighting!!! He is such a piece of garbage!
Tom takes no accountability for his actions. He is blaming Ariana basically for him cheating! He is the crazy one here!
he's so self interested...
He could do whatever he wanted but Ariana, I bet she couldn't..
And when she did Tom always wanted his name on it.
"Ariana doesn't kiss my ass so... Lemme find a lackey stan."
I don't use this term lightly because it's over used but Narcassist.... who finds himself needing to gaslight to appear more innocent and save his "image"
and it wouldn't surprise me if he turned into a men's rights activist.
He does things for his own ego.
Oh stop . You don’t know him .
It’s not like no one has ever cheated before. Grow up
He’s an idiot. He needs a therapist, a crisis manager, a better PR person, and an acting coach.
Man..howie just dismisses everything his daughter says and she's the one that actually knows whats going on.
Exactly my thoughts. Very dismissive, and unfortunate that a woman's perspective was not honored or brought to the table.
@@MENTION-IT-ALL She didn’t get a chance tho
Howie interrupted his daughter at every opportunity. Why have her as a co-host if you’re only interested in hearing yourself talk? She was clearly better prepared to run this discussion as a fan of the show; Howie should have taken a back seat.
Agreed! I was so annoyed!!!
@@MENTION-IT-ALL I mean, she explained the story as Chandler cheating on Monica, with her very best friend Rachel.
If someone could tape Howie's mouth shut and let his daughter just run the interview that would be amazing. He's giving NOTHING.
Seriously! Who does an interview and doesn’t do the smallest amount of background info?
shoosh lady
Howie’s daughter is married to the drummer/manager of Tom’s band. This is exactly how this interview is supposed to go… to try give him a chance to look good so it wouldn’t mess up Howie’s daughter’s husband’s band’s success.
It’s intentionally bad interviewing and compromises the integrity of this podcast and Howie’s image.
@@cristinamariacabral-corby9684 WOW! Thank you so much for filling me in! Talk about Nepo baby privilege!!!! Hope Howie lost his audience if this is the lazy faux journalism he wants to have on his podcast.
He gave a lot of excuses and justifications for it.
Sandoval is a legend in his own mind and Howie is fueling his clearly inflated ego. I'm nauseated by this interview.
I can actually sympathize with how Tom is feeling. He turned 40 and he was depressed and unhappy in his life.
Worst interview ever!!! I was screaming and hurling 🍅 🍅 🍅 🍅 's in the chat! Two disgusting misogynistic pigs!
@@dextermoore278 Then he should have had an ounce of integrity and left Ariana before he began having a relationship with a 26 year old.
@@sablank18 Raquel isn't 26. She is older than that.
@@dextermoore278 My bad. She’s 28 !
“Never did I think I’d get myself in a situation like this…” You started out Season 1 in a situation like this.
Exactly..once a cheat, always a cheat. If you develop a relationship with someone who is already in a relationship, don’t be surprised when it happens again. Growing apart does happen. Tom didn’t break up with Ariana because the excitement came from the sneaking around. This interview was disgusting. Offering Excuses and acceptance of Tom’s vile behavior shows who Howie truly is.
So true EXACTLY like this.
PFFFTTT- 😭😂😂😂
Lol, that's what I thinking.
Facts
"I don't need this house" ... proceeds to refuse to leave said shared house
I noticed that too lol he’s such a tool
Exactly! Then GTFO!
💯
Exactly! 👏🏿👏🏿👏🏿👏🏿
Tom said he couldn't AFFORD to buy a new place. They have to sell their house, first.
Howie please please do not ever interview someone, when you are clueless about what is going on. This interview could have been better!
I feel like he was feigning ignorance. He’s either that lazy not to prep on a guest or has little respect for his audience that he’s willing to provide such half assed interview because he knows it’ll get views. Either way I’m not impressed.
Just because Howie wasn’t on the bandwagon to destroy Tom like many of y’all are doing doesn’t mean he held a poor interview. This is someone who has a personal relationship with Tom rather than us who have a para social relationship with him. Howie did a great job by not allowing the pressure of these bravo fans get to him, he was unbiased, and created room for Grace from human to human. Many people are so quick to discard this man and that’s ridiculous. Look at this contextually and not just off the surface. Ariana and Tom’s relationship sounded insufferable.
@@bltpod don’t disagree about para-relationships but turning up to work and effectively saying “I don’t have a clue what’s going on but let’s have a chat about whatever” is poor show for anyone. It’s insulting to his viewers.
The relationship sounded insufferable from one side & ironically the scenario with Raquel is exactly the same thing he did with Kristen. Friendship, stolen kisses etc. Tom could’ve been anyone but Mandel needs to not waste his audience’s time if can’t be bothered to do minimum research.
@@amalali504 I think Howie came into it with a clear head and wanted to be informed along the way by the very man himself being interviewed. He doesn't need to watch VPR to feel "prepared" for this interview when the person there can literally walk him through the real life situation. I don't think it's insulting at all. I think people are trying to find more ways to discredit Howie and this is the lowest-hanging fruit to do so. It's just silly.
@@bltpod You seem to project a lot on Howie & your argument is a strawman’s. He doesn’t need to have watched VPL to not know that Arianna & Raquel were very close which may’ve put context into reason for the “Hoopla”. As an interviewer you prep so you know the situation & can ask informative & thoughtful questions that really add colour to a situation however controversial. As an interviewer you should have the ability to challenge & examine to get to the matter.
Howie gets paid handsomely for his Podcast. He can’t short change his loyal viewers & not expect feedback. He needs to do better regardless of who’s interviewing because this was very poor indeed & not because he didn’t give Sandorval a hard time. I didn’t tune in for an annihilation session but for a balanced, truthful exchange.
There are plenty of great podcasts out there & only so much time for us to listen & this was a waste of my time so has me pissed.
You’re entitled to you opinion.
It's funny that he claims he had such a difficult time breaking up with Ariana because she was "in denial" and "threatened to self sabotage". Yet when she figured out about his affair with Raquel, she broke it off IMMEDIATELY. Which just proves that had she known the truth from the start, it would have resulted in the end of the relationship. So gross that he forced her to go to couples therapy and only talked in "hypothetical" terms when he was actively being unfaithful ..
She didn’t have all the information when he was trying to break up with one of the most sane matter of fact ppl on VPR
This!!! 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻
According to him, he did break up with her and she wouldn't stop. He said they were done by the time she found out. She didn't break it off immediately, it was already done but she stopped trying to win him back the moment she found out he had been with raquel.
Maybe couple therapy was her idea
She is just one of them good women who trusted her spouse. And was trying to keep her mental together and didn't realize he was "distant" I don't understand how even if they were living "separate lives " he was living with her being disrespectful. Your supposed to break up first and then you can talk to someone like this isn't hard
Howie respectfully isn’t asking good questions. We need someone who actually knows what’s going on and didn’t get briefed on the topic.
100% the completely wrong person to be interviewing him for the first time
Howie does not know all the background though
We need Heather McDonald!
Can you say softball
Hopefully we get that with Andy at the reunion! I feel like Tom agreed to go on this podcast because he felt safe and he wouldn’t get hard questions. And he still ended up looking like a total narcissistic douche.
So many missed opportunities to ask relevant questions, and Howie cutting off his daughter at every opportunity and not finding anything wrong with how Tom handled this is just disgusting.
His daughter wasn’t trying to even hear the context and give that some understanding yet she was loyal to trying to tear Tom down and that’s unfair. Howie sounded like a sensible person who had a sound conversation that was not blindly impacted by reports unlike his daughter who sounded like a crazed fan.
Because he doesn’t want Tom to look like an asswipe that he is!! Horrible interview
TOM is SKUM and karma Got his number!! ☎️📞
His daughter didn’t even get a chance to finish her thoughts on the matter and get feedback to change her mind.
@@jackiegonzales4761 💯😂
I’m just trying to imagine Howie justifying this if it was his own daughter this was happening to. Would that guy be “super nice and talented” still?? This is bulls***
Also Sandoval is a terrible singer so what talent is he talking about?!?!
Out of all of the sh*tty things that have transpired in the world, this is what makes you the angriest??? Unbelievable.
Then don’t watch it?
This is the short of it: Tom turned 40. He panicked because he’s getting older, real life is setting in, he’s not as attractive as he once was, he’s not as fun as he once was, the same things that used to make him happy and/or excited don’t anymore. He’s looking for an escape from his reality. In comes Rachel. The young, fun, new, exciting single girl that is giving Tom all the attention he so desperately needs. Classic narcissist. She feeds his ego and thinks he’s the best thing since sliced bread. This makes Tom’s brain feel really good, releasing dopamine, etc which is making him believe he’s in love with Rachel. This is called limerence. Tom’s brain is acting that of a child. One day he will wake up when the pattern with Rachel repeats. If he doesn’t get a grip on his mental health and the reason he is acting like this, he will continue to repeat the pattern. Thinking he’s found his true love of his life, reality sets in, his wandering eye is awaken, he cheats, and moves on to the next girl. Wake up, Tom! He honestly might have borderline personality disorder, but definitely Peter Pan Syndrome!
Tale as old as time…
I agree with all points but one. Let’s be clear. He was NEVER attractive. Lol. Literally never . 😂
CLASSIC NARCISSIST!!! 🎯
Agreed! We all do that lol
this is the best, most honest detail of who he is
Howie should have just said “boys will be boys” and saved us 1:19:03
💯💯😂
Perfectly said
OMG FOR👏REAL👏🙄
Exactly
Gross .. the more I hear him and howie … so gross
this is the most unprepared, so far fetched pod cast i’ve seen in my entire life. like blind leading blind
Sandoval chose this platform on purpose. He knew dang well he wouldn't be properly grilled and skewered like he should have been. This was a total joke.
@@clarissa585 right?! And because of that, he was able to accuse the actual victim here of both emotional and physical abuse unchecked. Awful!!
I agree. Total dribble.
It’s downright irresponsible
If the content of the podcast itself wasn’t bad enough, the production of this is atrocious. If he thought this was a good idea, he is going to be VERY disappointed.
Why the hell is howie trying to mansplain cheating and justify it by using mental health 🙄 disgusting
Because he is a human and made a mistake lime 50% of people in marriages. The reason he explained is bc people want to know how he felt and what transpired up to the affair.
Exactly... FUCK YOU, Howie!!! This is such crap and entirely unfair to others who suffer from mental health issues who do step forward and take accountability.
Mansplaining? Stop with the labels. What did you want him to say? It's obvious it was wrong but figuring out how it happened this way makes actual sense. You can actually not condone cheating but also understand why it occurred. It's not mutually exclusive.
@@moongurl1978 agree. I think Tom should do more podcasts. Why is everyone else telling his story?
@@jenniferwasko4540 thank you! Everybody is on here quickly destroying Tom and not even considering the mental anguish he experienced while being with Ariana who threatened to end her life if he leaves her. If a man threatened to end his life to stop his girl from breaking up with her, we would immediately bash him for that.
It is absolutely not the ending of the relationship that is worse, it’s the affair because now everyone feels betrayed, lied, & manipulated to say the least
Howie is so dismissive of his daughter and also justifying the situation.
Dissappointing
First episode I ever listened to and definitely the last.
he never once said he justified it. I mean what tom did was wrong. he is still human.
They way Tom tries to remain calm and articulate and then you see his true emotion come out in spurts of temper tantrums and hysterics of believing he truly is the victim before he catches himself and goes back to playing it cool is definitely something they study in psychology classes
why did I read that as "psychopath" classes lol😅
yes from the beginning he had a attitude like he didn’t know what he was there to talk about it
omg 100% -- I need a behavioral analyst youtuber to break it down..
I've been waiting for weeks to hear something and this guy just bored the shit out of me. To be expected.
100 %!
I love how no one mentioned that Rachel was very very close friends with Ariana. That’s a big huge part of the problem.
like how did the daughter not bring it up !?!
Was she? These people change allegiance very day
I was literally waiting for one of them to bring that up!! Pisses me off
I think this is what makes it so much worse.
My opinion I don't think she was ever ever A TRUE FRIEND not at all I think she was jealous of her life and relationship and he fell for it because he wasn't getting anything I'm sorry not sorry .. for her to continue to rub it in Ariana's face by sleeping with gim in there hone still is beyond DISGUSTING 🔥😡 she didn't care who she hurt or playing the villain would get her her ten minutes of attention... " HOW DID THAT GO GIRL ..… this is so childish Ariana is so right just overgrown CHILDREN .. keep shining ARIANA 🌟💎🌟💜♾️☮️💜🥰😘🤗 can't wait to see your first movie ... Your beautiful inside and out girl ... BIG BIG HUGS 🤗😘💜💜💜💜🌺🍀💋💋💋
Getting a ad of Ariana during this interview is GOLD!!! ❤❤❤ GO QUEEN
That was amazing!
Ya . A victim gets to go on Broadway for being cheated on . I never got to go on Broadway for being cheated on when I was pregnant with my child when my ex cheated on me 🙄
What a great example 🙄
@@frenchtoast7742 lmao what the heck
Wow, what a thrilling interview! Even with a generous interviewer like Howie, Sandoval still managed to dig himself deeper in his hole full of excuses and delusion. My heart breaks for Ariana who had to hear him say all this about her after everything he put her through. He and Rachel deserve each other!
Right!
Exactly this was the easiest interview ever and he still managed to look like a 0 remorse unapologetic douche.
There needs to be more compassion for people
@@alexandrayanes4375 how do we have compassion for someone with no compassion
😂 the gift that keeps giving, he just can’t stop failing
THE MOST PAINFUL THING FOR ARIANA IS THE ENDING OF THE RELATIONSHIP? No that’s the best part. The worst part is the betrayal.
Exactly!
She knew. She is a very smart woman! She said it herself that she is smarter than everyone!
Why are we disregarding the fact that Raquel was great friends with Ariana?! Completely being underplayed. So bizarre to take this stance without wanting to know the whole story, Howie.
Double betrayal and humiliation. Unforgiveable
Howie had ZERO knowledge of Vanderpump Rules and the background to this situation and never should have given Tom a platform to gaslight Ariana!
you are so right. how did they go through the entire interview without the daughter, who is very familiar with the full story, discussing the best friend betrayal aspect?? Howie kept saying he didn’t understand what the big deal is about, his daughter KNOWS but never mentions it. My guess is that Tom must have made avoiding that aspect a condition of his appearance on the podcast. Agreeing to do the show as long as that part is not brought up. it’s the only logical explanation
Imagine finding out your man is cheating by seeing a video on his phone of another woman playing with her vagina how disgusting
Great friends or for the show. This is a show people!!!!
the guy who lied to his girlfriend about his whereabouts (bc he was cheating) when she called distraught by her GRANDMOTHER dying? he’s commendable?? he’s all good??? wow. literally disgusting
He legit convinces himself he’s a good guy for all of this 🤣🤣🤣
Such a w⚓️
What Adriana said in the finale was The best assessment of who Rachel is. This girl has no identity she’s looking for her identity in men. Something to that effect. Smartest line I’ve heard in reality tv. Adriana is smart and beautiful and will have her next act. I thought they should’ve separated when she didn’t want to have kids and he wanted to be a father. Best wishes to all in the situation!
No . Ariana is too entitled
Her victim mongering is going to bite her in the butt again .
She is going to do it to the next guy . You watch 😂
This whole podcast is Tom trying to justify his actions and it’s absolutely sickening. There is nothing that he can say that makes what he and Rachel did OK. It’s insane.
And also Howie trying to stick up for Tom, and cut his daughter off and interrupt constantly when she was trying to say the RIGHT time to get out was the second he got feelings for Rachel.
How he is only looking at it as a man cheating on his girlfriend and not everything that's tied around it like Raquel and Ariana being friends and Ariana being there for retail or the fact that Schwartz had a crush on Raquel while Tom was screwing her and didn't know it. This is so much more than just someone cheating on someone
He knows he messed up. On many levels. I hope he has learned from this mess.
i am not mad at Tom for falling in love with someone else, I am mad that he cheated and basically blew up their entire friend group!!
But why are u “mad” at Tom or Raquel? Disappointed sure, but they’ll work it out, we aren’t their friends and it’s a reality show.
He's a coward
@@imcharmed4evrSandoval and Rachel trigger us all. Tom does the same thing in all his relationships, which is tell the new girl how she is so special and so different than his current gf...gaslighting the current gf about how their relationship is so bad, after he's been unfaithful multiple times and has moved on with someone new already. Arianna thought she was special, and different. Then Rachel thought she was special and different, because that's what he told her. But the difference is Rachel didn't think people were going to find out till they planned, and she wanted Arianna's popularity, fame, and her life. She sees women as competition. She never thought people would care, and saw no difference in what they were doing, anymore than James and Lala hooking up. 9 years of basically a marriage, may as well be 2 weeks.
he cheated and Shagged Rachel in the home he shared with Ariana and while she was away at a funeral.
He didn’t fall in love with Rachel
This man is so delusional. Did he think he’d get on this podcast and stutter through his bullshit indignations and think people were going to believe this? Even *if* this were true, he takes zero accountability and still places the entire blame on Ariana. He makes her out to look like she was near a psychotic break.
This narcissist is trying to gaslight us all into thinking he’s the victim. Throw the whole man away.
🔊🔊🔊🔊
💯💯💯
Tom was unhappy in his relationship with Ariana and he felt trapped. There was no romance or intimacy left in their relationship. However, Tom should have broken up with Ariana a long time ago.
👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼
Both he and Schwartz are cut from the same cloth they both gaslig emotionally and mentally abused their women, Sandovile bullied Ka.
#Scandoval thing is huge because it brings Season 1 - 10 to a full circle.
Sandoval + Kristen. Kristen + James. James + Raquel. Raquel + Sandoval.
Bizarre
Icky I hope everyone has a large supply of penicillin and monistat.
Or Valtrex. LoL Can you imagine the hookups we do not know about?
Oooo shit!!! U are so right!! Yuck!!
Not to mention that Sandoval not only paid but also planned and set up the Coachella location for James to propose to Raquel!!! So many layers of weird.
James took Tom ex, now Tom took James ex🤣🤣🤣
What gets me is Ariana saw Tom was willing to cheat on Kristen with her and then admits she knew he slept with Miami girl but went out of her way to lie in order to protect Tom (or her ego as Kristen was right) so she saw red flags early on.
Exactly. She def wanted to show that she was it for him. The cast has mentioned before how they were totally different behind cameras. I def believe Tom when he mentioned her saying that she wasn’t letting him breakup with her
@Name she admitted it when he was talking to her 1on1 and reminded her that he tried to break up with her and she threatened to kill herself.
Instead of denying it or calling him a liar she said "then you should have left".
For years she talked about being suicidal on the show so she was emotionally blackmailing him.
Tom is no Saint. I'm not even a fan of his but it makes me sick to see people pretending Ariana is some God incapable of being flawed like the rest of us.
I remember the backlash when she insulted half the country by bashing Republicans and virtue signaling about "don't slut shame" only to slut shame Miami Girl, Kristen and Rachel.
@@PaulDoe79 emotionally blackmailing! Perfectly said!
Because she got the Sandoval treatment- "you're nothing like my gf, you are so special, I've never felt like this with anyone..." So Rachel thought the same thing, with the bonus of seeing the life her friend had, that was going to be hers.
As horrible as all of this was, they did Ariana the biggest favor. She is going to be able to go on and get the love and appreciation she truly deserves. Sandoval is and always has been a dirtbag of a person. Wish him and Raquel the worst. ❤🥰
I wish Tom and Raquel the best.
Yes and Raquel will be on the receiving end of this in the very near future and as soon as some something shinier comes along to get Tom's attention.
@Dexter Moore you sound like an absolute moron. Get help
Ariana will find a man to love her like she should have instead of an 8 year old man-child
Hey wishing someone the worst is not anything you want to wish / the fingers point back to you / U don’t want bad karma
I think the larger issue is that Rachel was super close to Ariana and that’s why this is larger than life. It’s incomprehensible. People cheat, I’ve fallen for a married man and I’m not saying I was right, but the fact the 3 of them were friends and she was taken under Ariana’s wing is why this is so heartbreaking to people.
Agree. Would have been bad with anyone but the fact it was with raquel, who ariana was really close with AND James was engaged to...
I'm sorry but I doubt their friendship was that deep, obviously it wasn't,and Ariana has not came and said any differently
@@melmc9672 well it was.
You can fall for a married man but if you CHOOSE to be a mistress then you’re trash.
Rule number one. Never cheat....with a friend or family member. It's just gross!!
There’s a reason Tom chose to do this podcast over the millions of other options out there 😅 he took the easy way out with this one. What a chump.
My thoughts exactly...I wished the daughter would've done a better job when it came down to asking the questions since she actually watch the show and know who the cast are
How this guy didn’t bother to binge watch season 10 for the interview is beyond. I had to sacrifice two days worth of my life to get myself up to date for scandoval.
so lazy
Sandoval saying he is proud of Schwartz for hurting Katie by doing the one thing, the only thing she asked him to respect "please don't hook up with someone in the friend group."That tells me everything about his character....he has none.
After watching this I couldn’t help but wonder… how many affairs has Howie had?
Oh my gosh you're the first comment I've came across that has said that I have been thinking that the whole time I've been watching this!!!!!!! The only reason a man would talk that way about an affair is if he has justify having his own affairs. 100% believe he's cheated multiple times
YES YES YES
You’re absolutely right. I was pulling my hair out listening to Howie.
Exactly.
100%. I’ve never seen a man so quick to minimize having an affair.
If Tom thought this was gonna help him look better he is delusional
I think it's safe to say that Tom is, indeed, delusional.
AGREED
People like him are always delusional. They will always be the hero or the victim and never the villain. And everyone else just won’t “get it”. They should study people who cheat mainly in situations like these and have very little to no actual remorse.
I think Tom explained himself very well. They had a horrible, toxic, sexless relationship. Ariana is BORING AF. He should have dumped her years ago.
💯
The level of disrespect to Ariana is mind boggling. The fact he can sit here and speak so highly of Rachel and talk so much shit about Ariana while blaming her for everything is disgusting.
This how men act when they are done with a woman.
The fact that Howie is babying Tom so much and has never even seen the show
Saying to Arianna, “ I don’t think I can be faithful with you” while he’d been cheating behind her back for MONTHS, says it all. The gaslighting Arianna, the blaming her depression and their lack of sex, complaining about her personality and lack of attention…..Arianna is right- he IS a toddler. No accountability, no honor, no maturity, and honestly he deserves to be cancelled. He created this mess, let him lie in it.
He’s a narcissist. He’s playing the victim. He didn’t even apologize at all to her at first when he wrote his sad excuse of an apology. And news flash to Tom: maybe she was depressed and didn’t fck u because you’re a pos and your behavior has always been such a turn off. My ex despised my depression and anxiety and he was abusive af. When he left jr magically disappeared.
THIS.
No one will understand Tom unless you're trapped in a sex-less relationship (lacking connection for years) for a while. Raquel became his fountain of joy and a jolt to his spine. He deserves to be happy!
@@ctc6960 I agree but this wasn’t the way to do it. He is wrong Af. And he is a liar. He even admitted to her changinf and was so sweet and amazing. He’s a pos. If you haven’t watched every season you’d know why this isn’t like any other cheating scandal. This man is a manipulative narcissist and he displays the textbook symptoms MANY times over the years. He’s awful. If I was Ariana I would be so turned off and depressed too witb him. That’s what many fail to realize, with toxic dudes like this you don’t realize it in the moment, but they get you to that point. Myself and many other men/women who’ve been thru these type of relationships say they same. We leave and it’s like our problems go away. We are happier, we have those spicy feelings again, anxiety goes away. It’s incredible how it works.
That’s out of context. Ariana is also to blame
This is honestly so disgusting. Glad he went on here it made him look like the gaslighting narcissist we all know he is.
Insane howie didn’t do his homework. He didn’t get the full story. No wonder he didn’t understand why everyone is attacking him 🤯
Jackelyn staring at her dad with a look of "Hmmm is my dad being misogynistic right now?...do I try to correct him or just nod because he won't get it?" is so relateable lol
I wish she would of said something! I don’t fault her though.
He was singing with his band with Ariana & Raquel (his two women) cheering him on at the stage! He is Very sick!!!📣
This is one of the most painful interviews I have ever listened to. I can't believe anyone signed off on publishing this. What a shame.
I loved it too!
Howie's his friend wants him to look better. He's only helping him out, at least trying.
So boring too
Does Tom not realize he’s basically describing every single mid life crisis anybody has ever had? He’s such a narcissistic cliche and instead of just having the balls to break up with her he basically blames her for not catching on to his hints?
Jax rubbed off on him
But they did break up two weeks prior to her finding out about raquel. She wouldnt stop
@@bismakhan5280 he was cheating on her for months prior, are you challenged?
@@spamgarbage6999 The people in these comments defending him are his friends and PR team. The occasional cheater defending a fellow cheater.
@@bismakhan5280 so he says. Plus he was cheating on her for months before that already.
Taking her to "couples counseling" to break up with her, is manipulative AF! Going to counseling infers you want things to get BETTER. He basically "led her on" for months, secretly hoping the therapist would do the breaking up for them (for him).
Especially the fact they went for months!! Wild he thinks we would believe any of this
@@LeahSessions he's such a scumbag! Saying she flat out said "no I won't let you leave me" 🙄 Please! Ariana begs nobody to stay!
@@minners19 Please. You DON'T EVEN KNOW ARIANA. CLOWN 🤡 😂😂😂
ok what we're NOT going to do is make Tom some victim here. The unhinged delusion in this interview is honestly staggering and the doubling down makes him actually look worse if that's possible
So according to Howie, it's totally ok to cheat on your partner as long as it's because you were going through a midlife crisis, since y'know they weren't married. Even though they had been together for 10 years and owned a house together. Cool. Good to know.
Ya I hate how boomers act like nothing is that serious unless you are married
He's unhinged. This wasn't even an interview. He never once said "Maybe she cares that it wasn't just ONE mistake but went on for 7+ months with her best friend".......
Echoing what everyone has already said - Tom is a narcissist. What’s crazy is throughout this entire interview, he did not apologise to Ariana or express genuine remorse once. Nor did he express any physical signs of emotion or regret. Claiming he loves & cares for her but demonises & blames her. Also, at no point in time did he take accountability for how he contributed to the demise of their relationship. Did he fulfil her needs? Was he attentive? He loves deflecting blame. Incredibly disappointed with Howie too. He spent the entire interview justifying Tom’s behaviour and barely asked any relevant questions. He also did not challenge Tom. Wish Howie’s daughter was able to run this episode or perhaps she should start her own podcast where she has more autonomy.
He definitely is NOT a narcissist. 🤦♀️
@@MrsK976 what part of centring themselves as the victim in every version of events they share, deflecting blame onto other people, failing to apologise and dodging accountability for their wrongs makes them NOT a narcissist?
@@A-ze4vh he apologized and said it was wrong to cheat. He said it several times in this podcast alone. So how can you see he was “failing to apologize.” Did you even listen to the podcast? He certainly apologized and said it was wrong numerous times. A narc wouldn’t even do that. He deserves to be happy. Arianna would never have made him happy. She ignored him in marriage, children and intimacy. What type of partner is that????? Not a partner at all.
@@MrsK976 I’m not sure what kind of expectations and standards you have, but the mere act of “apologising” does not imply remorse. People apologise all the time or make an outward acknowledgement of wrongdoing (as Tom clearly did in this case) without being sincere. It is clear that Tom spent more time critiquing all of Ariana’s ‘flaws’ rather than taking any personal accountability (such as how he contributed to the tension in their relationship). His acknowledgement that it is “wrong to cheat” is not an impressive threshold to meet, in fact, it is the bare minimum. Plenty of narcissistic people apologise to save face also (hence not being sincere) and Tom has clearly recognised his businesses are at risk. Your commentary on Ariana not being a suitable partner because she ignored him in regards to intimacy and children also clearly shows your bias towards Tom and your illogical defence of him. Whatever the state of their relationship, he had 9 years to decide to leave if he was not happy. Any issues on her end also does not excuse the cheating and deception that was at play.
Jax went to every reunion he ever participated in saying he was “sorry” and was changing his life to become a better person and then would show up to the next reunion the same and spitting the same garbage. He was definitely a narcissist and even agreed that he was a narcissist- he’s the only case study in this group of friends you need to observe to see the truth. Tom has taken from his playbook multiple times but goes about it more smoothly
No way Tom does yard work! He would never get his hands dirty and risk messing up his nail polish and make up 😂💯💯
😂😂😂
I don't know why Tom doesn't know he is actually gay.
@@beatricelovato2886 facts 💯
😂😂😂dying
Would hate to be Howie’s wife right now if this is how he judges infidelity
he said numerous times he doesn’t condone infidelity
@thankgodfey Agreed. Ouch.
@@pamelav4861 he said he doesn’t see anything wrong with what happened, doesn’t see what all the fuss is about, and made Tom the victim in the situation.
@@thankgodfrey he lit said at least 4 or 5 times he doesn’t condone cheating but he was more interested in tom’s mindset and how it got here.
@@pamelav4861 oh stop
I get it. People grow apart. They meet other people and go their own ways.
The part I will never understand is the bold face lying to everyone’s faces and to the fans. That just speaks so badly of Tom’s and Rachel’s characters/reputations.
Stop blaming Ariana for your failures, Tom. It’s YOUR fault.
And for lort’s sake, don’t give yourself applause for your performance. Nobody wants to hear that.
I can’t wrap my head around this entire interview. Truly speechless!! Tom is more disgusting that I imagined.
I don't think Tom is disgusting. I think he felt trapped and didn't know what to do with Ariana. Like he said, they were business partners, a brand and on VPR together. They own a home together. They are stuck in this house together, right now, which is horrible.
I wish he would have went on call her daddy podcast 😭
@@dextermoore278 bro, get a life, it’s so sad and embarrassing that you’re under every comment trying to defend a 40yo man baby
Agreed. He's trying to blame her for everything
@@dextermoore278 I can't believe you're buying his bullshit.
There needs to be the WWHL drinking game to take a sip every time Tom says “you know” and “like”
and dude
We’d all be in the hospital or dead
This was a horrible podcast
No way my liver could deal with that 😂😂😂😂
He said like.1,962 times
LOL I’m cringing this whole interview because Howie was CLEARLY the wrong person to have this conversation. He doesn’t know anything! And he’s defending Sandoval while knowing nothing! Genius idea
It’s really not that hard to figure out what happened here. Tom started going through a midlife crisis and felt like he was getting old and didn’t have all the things that he had dreamed he would have. So he started looking outside of the relationship for validation, thinking the grass would be greener elsewhere. Ariana sensed a disconnect and started pulling away from him, intimately, because she’s probably like a lot of women who need to feel super connected and super understood to be able to have sex. Then he got even more frustrated and started focusing on sex sex sex. Then Raquel comes along, this hot little groupie, who was able to give his ego everything it needed, including the sex he clearly was obsessing over. The really sad part of all this is, building a relationship upon a foundation of lies is a death sentence. Ultimately, Tom will end up single, middle-aged, wishing he could go back in time and have done things completely differently. Even if Raquel and him manage to somehow make this last for a little while, and have a baby or get married or whatever, the way that this relationship started is unsustainable, and they will never have a foundation of respect and trust which are crucial for any long-term commitment. Tale as old as time. I feel sorry for him because he really did dig his own grave here and karma is going to be a a huge bitch to him in the end.
OK. My best friend did this to me. It was horrible. It was humiliating and the whole experience just gutted me. They went on to date for YEARS and YEARS and I used to see him with other girls all the time. He was a serious womanizer. Now, YEARS later, I see that God did me a huge favor by removing these two horrible people from my life. Ariana will eventually be happy again and we will see what happens with Tom and Raquel.
I think this is best for everyone, instead of crucifying all these people, let’s support them as individuals. They know it was shitty. I think that’s very clear he was trying to end it without hurting her, their brands, etc. I think this was a good interview and people need to chill out. My god.
Tom was with Kristen when Ariana first kissed Tom and she was very unapologetic about it
Same happened to me - it bothers you yrs later still.
@@kristinleigh3645 💯
@@kristinleigh3645 ummm, that's not at all what this person was saying 😂😂😂😂 he didn't give a **** about hurting her. he cared about the "brand."
Howie "I'm not condoning cheating on your partner"
No!.. just excusing it, downplaying it, and justifying it. But God forbid if you condone it.
Am I in the f#*!ing twilight zone here? Dafuq?
Jessica, I can't believe it either.
he said ariana is more upset the relationsthip ended than was cheated on my lorddddd i wish i had his ego
I NEEDED Jackie to ask Scandoval "Was Raquelle the only person you cheated on Arianna with??" - I certainly hope hope hope that Andy Cohen asked that at the Reunion. Listening to this interview was like listening to my ex-husband. The narcissism is astounding. I can't imagine how low Scandoval feels, but I can tell you for a FACT that the pain Arianna is experiencing is 10x worse.
Girl, have you not watched the show? Ariana was the other woman and Tom cheated on her right away with “Miami girl” - that’s why I have no sympathy for her. 😹 Only thing I feel for her is the fact that he did this with her best friend who she trusted.
I saw a sneak peek of it & yes Andy asks tom if there was other women and he lists a few, even Raquelle was shocked by one
Out of Tom Sandavol, Howie, and Jackie...Jackie is the only one that comes across as likable and having common sense. Sandavol's ego and Howie's kiss ass questions and overall lack of understanding of the show makes this interview basically unlistenable.
Well we know he has cheated before. That has come out, although he tries to deny it
Howie you are an idiot just saying
Howie: I'm an advocate for mental health
You know what's not great for a person's mental health? Being cheated on!
And having your mental health struggles shared -not by you but by your cheating ex!
And Ariana was the one with mental problems. She opens herself talking about depression and therapy last season. Sandoval is just an opportunistic ass
Right by two important people
No shit eh
@@Brooke00755 well on a podcast for the world to see to boot. He's a scum bag.
The reason why this blew up so much is because of the friendship between the girls. Raquel being around Ariana constantly, going on trips, girls night out all while she was sleeping with Tom. Yes there was cheating in the past but they were hook ups not affairs
I'd like to know what Rachel's dad's thoughts are. He had such strong opinions about that a**hole James, so I would like to hear him discuss the whole season regarding his daughter. I bet she's made her dad proud.
Yes, Howie , give Rachel's dad a voice, too! I can't wait to hear how he feels!
I have a feeling this isn’t his first rodeo
Leave Raquel alone ! She was with A..hole James. Raquel was doing her.. still learning life. Ariana always stated she wants nothing physical, including having children. Tom always stated that was what he needed & Ariana always shut him down. I'm on Tom & Raquel's side.
I cannot imagine being her parent. She is a shameful STRUMPET!!!
Knowing he “kissed” Rachel in Mexico and then gaslit everyone who questioned him at Rachel’s bday camping trip about them sneaking around together makes me feel a certain type of way about it. If u had been up front and honest from the jump maybe there would have been a different reaction.
There’s a reason Tom agreed to this interview. He knew it would be easy and he wouldn’t get tough questions.
He is giving all the specific details without being asked.
Good old boys supporting each other regardless who gets hurt. Disturbing.
Between Sandy and Schwartz im sure Bravo isn't happy they're not saving all this for the show!
Shalom on THAT! Hit the nail on the head...
I kinda think it’s a good bias opinion idk.
As someone who has watched VPR since the beginning... This is just a broken record. It's not the first time he paints his girlfriend as crazy and how unhappy he is to excuse his cheating. He left Kristen for Ariana and is now doing it to Ariana with Rachel.
Tom was cheating the entire time, from beginning of Kristen to the end of Ariana. He just got caught this time. ☕️
Except Ariana is not “normal” why so many people like her is beyond me.
Literately. I have the older seasons playing now. Even with Miami Girl how she described their night was her and Tom talked all night, he was sweet and they ended up kissing and then some. Sound familiar? Said the same thing about Ariana and now he's saying the same thing about Rachel. Scheana even said how good of a liar he is and though he always told Jax to grow up.... he's literally acting like Jax.
And he’ll do it to Rachel in 9 years for his second midlife crisis
Kristen cheated on him with his best friend. She's no victim.
Relationship lacks intimacy so the next step is OBVIOUSLY to cheat on your 9 year long girlfriend with her bff for months instead of just breaking up 💀
Or instead of trying to make things better with what you have like the grass is greener with Wrequel the twit 🤦♀️
I think the affair has been much longer. Either way, it's disgusting!
So frustrating that when Howie asked why there was so much backlash about this affair, no one said it was partly because he cheated with his partner’s best friend! UGH
Jax slept with his girlfriend... it's what they do
That was gross too… but Jax and Kristen was a one time drunk hookup, not a 7 + month affair
You have to reremember, this is what goes on in Hollywood. Affairs are a dime a dozen there.
@@paigea4745 Jax made it very clear that it happened twice...and if he was sorry, he would have only done it once.
It’s interesting how much he talks about the image and optics of being together being it’s main benefit vs love, support, growth etc. very telling.
Right, if she was down so bad, if he actually loved her he would’ve been worried and trying to take care of her, he did the opposite
@@Bota29ayoalso it sounds like he escaped his own negative feelings about his life through the thrill of new affection connection etc. the issue is internal and isn’t going to be solved with a new person. That’s a pattern with a lot of cheaters. Trying to solve internal issues through using people.
The obsession with his image and selfish actions and disregard for other’s feelings totally align with characteristics of a narcissist
Howie excusing away tom’s behavior - particularly when his daughter pointed out Tom should have ended the relationship before the affair and Howie makes a case for how he couldn’t - makes me think Howie is a self absorbed cheater himself. Like gets like lol.
just finished s10 and i know it’s only downhill from there. why would you platform this man howie
I Can NOT wait for Sheana and Lala to get a hold of this interview. Tom is gross.
CANNOT WAIT 🎉
FACTS!!!
Lala is going to be on WWHL tomorrow!
@@MirtaS226 they NEED to talk about this I’m BEGGING
My first thoughts. And Andy
I never thought I’d wind up in a situation like this- Ive worked too hard for my image, business, integrity… everything.
Note the order of importance of the things he worked hard on and the total absence of Ariana or the relationship in that list
Howie, always the voice of reason. He made a mistake and the hatred has been beyond ridiculous. I think the post has been awesome. You treated him with a respect that he isn’t receiving very often these days. And, of course, you always place the importance on mental health above all. And I think Tom needed to hear that I always love you. And , this just made me love you more! So glad I found your podcast ☮️🙏❤️
Also the fact that they are downplaying the fact that this wasn’t just a “random hook up”. This was a full blown love affair with Rachel and Tom BEHIND Ariana’s back. They both lied to Ariana and I can’t wait to see the rest of the show.
I agree, I feel bad for Ariana she stuck up for Raquel over and over again on the show and now people are watching it knowing about the 8 month affair behind her back... It's such a horrible situation to put someone in
I agree. Rachel and Tom have now scared Adriana terribly! It is very cruel. He should've broken up with her years ago if he was that unhappy. Either way, he's a Liar and a Cheater. I have lost ALL respect.
No one thinks he's done the right thing...and rem how down on Jax he was over same thing! I do. Jeckle.
It is infuriating that Howie keeps praising Tom for being "open" about his issues. If Howie knew anything about the show he might understand that Tom is only being "open" in an attempt to manipulate the audience, apportion blame to Ari and push his narrative. His oh so familiar narrative, which he already used when he broke up with Kristen. In both situations he said that the relationship was no longer intimate and that they had become like roommates,living separate lives. Howie says he doesn't need to be familiar with the show to interview Tom and that just shows how utterly, frustratingly, ignorant he is of the whole situation. Tom couldn't have chosen a better interviewer! He totally fell for Tom's story. He also aides Tom by completely minimising the seriousness of Tom and Ariana's relationship . Who cares that they weren't legally married? They were in a de-facto relationship and owned a house together.If Howie knew the background, he might have pointed out that maybe the reason Ari seemed oblivious to Tom's affair, or the fact he was pulling away, was because she was grieving the loss of both Charlotte and her grandmother.As Howie was clueless he was unable to challenge Tom at all. Instead, Tom's version of events went completely unchallenged !
never thought Uncle Howie would get involved in Scandoval but here we are! 🤯
Probably because there is a connection with Toms drummer and Howie. Howie stated he didn’t even watch the show 🙄
***Canada's Uncle
Tom’s drummer and manager is married to Howie’s podcast producer… it’s not coincidence this is the first interview he chooses. He probably picked the questions 🙄
And its crap..Tom is shit and so is Rachel..honestly..he HINTED he wanted to break up..wtf..
except he has no idea what is going on because he doesn't watch the show.
I wish he would just be 100% accountable for cheating & being a coward by hurting Ariana. No matter what, relationships go through ebs & flows. That is not an excuse to cheat. No one discusses the fact that alcohol is a major factor in this show in general as well as the decisions HE made as well as Raquel. The history of this show & the "bad" decisions these ppl make are centered around ample amounts of alcohol.
Now I know why Tom chose Howie's platform to tell his side...bc of the prior relationship AND Howie is literally OK with how things went down so Tom KNEW he would get sympathy and validation....MAKES SENSE NOW!
I think it says a lot about him that he keeps referencing his brand, or that he didn’t expect this to blow up so much. He’s honestly enjoying the fame, he’s always wanted it.
Apparently, that’s what he was with Ariana for his brand. So apparently, his new brand with Rachel is cheater/midlife crisis guy.
Wow…. I feel like I’m back to hearing the narrative from my cheating, narcissistic, gaslighting, manipulative ex husband.. Ariana.. it beyond indescribable the pain you go through… but this is the best thing to happen to finally get you out.
Omg I totally agree. Same situation happened with me. Tom is literal sewage.
I was sooo triggered too omg 😅
Being in a relationship for 12 years (and not married), the most heartbreaking thing to hear is that he wanted to do therapy AFTER he knew the relationship had no hope. Why not bring these issues to face before throwing away a relationship, partnership and friendship.
26:11 getting into therapy after Rachel and he kissed, no less
yeh and going to break up with her IN therapy. dude, what was that easier than a court order or something? Talking about her being in denial- then leave dude! Leave, pack your shit and go. Tom is such a joke!
He only got into therapy after he knew it was over so that he could look like a good guy and tell everybody that he went to therapy to try to fix it
Exactly. He already did Rachel in his backyard while Ariana was inside sleeping. To give her hope while he is sewing his oats through his midlife crisis is disgusting. If the grass is greener on the other side, water your own f'ing lawn!!
Howie is so biased it’s disgusting he should really watch the show and understand Tom and Ariana’s relationship. if this was his daughter I’m sure he would think differently of it
If the relationship was doomed then he should have ended it instead of cheating. There is no justification for cheating.
He only cared about his "image" and his "brand". This is not a man, he is a little boy that is not capable of taking ANY responsibility for his horrible and destructive actions. I can not say that I am surprised that he is shifting so much blame to Ariana and is making himself out to be a victim by saying that he was in a very sad and dark place and was trapped... Poor f*cking baby unable to make big boy decisions like ending a relationship and not continuously lying to someone that he claims was his best friend and always had his back! I hope we never have to see this pathetic mand child again.
Right! He didn’t talk about “the life we built together”….. he literally said “the brand we built together”…. So sad
Let’s not act like Ariana didn’t care about her image. Jax said 3 years ago their relationship wouldn’t last & they were more friends than anything. They also hid any problems.
I can’t with this guy. If they weren’t getting along, not spending time together, he lost his mojo or what the fuck ever - then break up with her!! Breaking up with someone doesn’t require 2 people. The other person doesn’t have to grant you permission. You decide and then your actions match it. This is exactly what he did to Kristin. He can’t stand to be alone so he lets relationships drag on until he finds someone else.
Completely left out how good of friends Rachel and Ariana were too
Moral of the story and something I’ve been told my entire life..a relationship started in infidelity will end in infidelity.
I believe him Idk: I think he felt trapped but it’s still inexcusable
The look on Howie's daughters face as she sits next to her dad & watches & listens to him justify the CHEATING is so sad & pathetic!
!!!!!!
I can’t imagine being in the spotlight or being in a situation where every move you make on a show is analyzed. I grew up before social media and I will forever be grateful for that!!! 🙌🏼😂
However.. Tom has NEVER admitted to making mistakes unless he’s been confronted with something he’s done wrong. He also constantly makes excuses for his actions.. it’s bullshit at the end of the day!!
He cheated on Kristen and then Ariana.. he needs to just get himself in check!
i think the primary issue here that’s not been spoken on……. feels like tom literally does not understand the difference between love and infatuation….. you didn’t love raquel. you were infatuated with her.
I feel like Howie is saying that everything is basically okay because they weren't married. That doesn't matter. What Tom did was wrong.
He took no accountability. Poor Ariana. I hope her mental health is well.
w Rachael
She lose about 180lbs when he left 😂
She needs the 6-Week deep in-house therapy with Dr. D. including the "Rodeo Rider" and "Abandonment" options.
He is so undeserving of any sympathy. His actions were inexcusable and disgusting. The reality of the situation is is that he is a narcissistic serial cheater.
"There were so many perks to the relationship...such as the image of it all" LMAO this dude is wild
He didn’t take it seriously. He said the connection wasn’t there. Why did he date her?
This is so crazy to watch in the wake of the last episode before the finale, when we saw Rachel confronting Ariana about how she should want to have sex with Tom and questioning whether she’s even attracted to him. To hear the situation spoken about so casually is insane, as if it wasn’t a calculated, vindictive betrayal.
Here for the rewatch post finale
Men lie to women. Sandy would have told rachel a right load of codswallop, about Ariana, and rachel so naive she trusts his word. "My wife doesn't understand me!"
Also, notice he lies that all they did was kiss that first time. We now know they had sex in the car while Ariana was in the house and then he rang the bell for Ariana to let him in.
Rachel is the ICK personified.
How do you know what he was feeling and thinking?!! Come on stop hating on this guy so much. You act like no one ever makes the same mistake twice! It doesn't make him a horrible person, he just made a horrible mistake.
Howie being an advocate for mental health while allowing Tom to trash Ariana's mental health is fucked up
This right here!!!
So it’s okay for Ariana and her friends to talk about it. But he can’t! I bet everything he said is true. The only thing he is guilty of is NOT ending the relationship!! I’m sure it was already over!!
That’s what I was thinking. He’s navigate for mental health. Where was Tom losing his mental health? What he did to Ariana was awful for her. And how dare he say Raquel is hot. Her cringe. He voice that sounds like her vocal cords are inflamed, and on fire is awful. Oh, and the phone ringing in the middle of the interview how classless
Wait, this man advocates for mental health?? My mind is blown
@@nicolegrant2750 ofc he can’t talk about someone else’s mental health! Are you tapped? Tf