I've been enjoying listening to so many of your original compositions! The mystery/suspense genre works well with your style, and I'm looking forward to seeing where this goes. If you plan on returning to this particular piece, I would recommend editing out some of the mentions of determination to survive and strengthening of their bond, especially toward the last section of the story. As cliched as this advice may sound, you'd benefit from a little more "show" and and little less "tell" for these moments. A change in posture, a certain set of the jaw, a softer voice, a bit of scenery for metaphor, etc. can do a lot of heavy lifting.
I literally can’t wait for the next part to come out!!👏 I’m so excited to find out what’s going to happen next!! On another note, I’m not as young as some of the other listeners are and I need my kids to explain how my phone works half the time, with that being said; if they’re using cameras and cell phones to track the people they’re trying to kill, couldn’t they just hide out in a cabin somewhere there isn’t any wifi or cameras to find them? I dunno, it’s just a thought…
Ok Doc, well you’ve certainly got my attention! And it’s holding firm so let’s get those sequels up and your audience fulfilled! So so many questions that still remain and if there are as many more parts to the story to come then I might just have to be more patient for the answers! Not my strongest suit. Aside from that it was an excellent story with multiple twists and turns that I can foresee happening much, much, more often in the future. So keep up the amazing work and deliver it to us all in the style only the great Dr Creepen can!! 👏👏👏👏👏👏
DOC - I’m loving your eloquent and descriptive writing style!! Your personal writing style goes perfectly with your style of narration. Great work!! Great Story!!!
I took quite a break from listening to pastas because I've literally listened to them ALL. All of yours, creeps and lighthouses (the other channels kind of suck by comparison ngl, yall got insane talent, and you definitely put insane work + talent.) I got back into them and listened to them ALL AGAIN, but forgot about this channel sadly. But boy am I happy to have remembered it. You only had 30k subs back when I listened, but now you have 300K!!!! Well earned, well deserved. Also the fact you narrate whole ass novels! I'll never be bored at work again!
That was an incredible story tonight. It is full of suspense and intrigue. I'm looking forward to more of this mystery. I really enjoy your narration. Job well done. Have a splendid weekend 🤗 ❤🌟
I’ve been listening to you for about 3 years and your stories got me through army basic training I was looking forward to every Sunday when I’d use my 30 mins of phone time to listen
Dr C, I believe I've heard you mention you having a position within a Uni...? I have to wonder whether you may be a Professor of Language Arts, Composition, or something within that field? Your use of the spoken word, while definitely creepy, is often eloquent. Almost poetry, from the imagery you invoke while setting up the story, to the rhythm of words within each line, your original writings are pleasing to the ear, despite the horror content. Keep giving us more, your stories are quite intriguing.
I'm going to sit back, maybe not grab a drink since I'm enjoying this laying down in bed, and most definitely listening. Thanks Dr. for yet another weapon in my arsenal against insomnia, those smooth and husky vocal eminations.
I don't like this story very much. Mainly because the decisions made by the main character border on ridiculous. I can see not notifying police immediately for fear of not being believed, but after he escaped a few attacks & gained possession of the guys phone, all he'd have to do then is photo the guy, grab the dudes wallet (along with his phone, of course) & go to the police. You now have evidence, other than the word of that manager guy. Afraid the cops are in on it? Just tell them that your lawyer friend (whose name you will not disclose to anyone) has already made copies of everything, (except manager's statements) with orders to release the story to other law enforcement agencies & media, should you disappear. & Does the character have any friends or family that could be at risk, or could file a missing person report with police? So dude just goes on the run telling no one, knowing the possibility of having to kill one of the "hunters?" He's probably wanted by police for assault & theft already & only half way into the story.
If everyone did the right thing immediately we,'d have no horror stories or creepypastas cause everyone would go straight to the police or buy an AK-47! Besides there are more people than you realize that do the dumbest things, over and over. I'm a 911 operator and you would be shocked how many people put themselves in danger and many more that don't think!
Hi Doc! I appreciate your writing, but I was having difficulty getting into tonight's story. I will try again tomorrow when I'm more alive. Have a fabulous weekend everyone!🤗💜🕷
I really thought Jamie was going to be a part of the game. Though it seems as if she is on his side and that they are being hunted together, it would be an awesome twist if she manufactured the "list" he read of those he thinks is after the two of them and Jamie used this as a way to experience the "hunt" alongside him and watch him suffer from a more intimate position (right alongside him). Maybe he killed a loved one by mistake a long time ago? Maybe something he did or said changed her life for the worst? She came into some money to enact her intricate revenge plan, and he is none the wiser? I don't know. I just really thought the girl he's running around with is really the one who orchestrated all this then got herself a front row seat in the action running around with him, watching him slowly devolve and become more and more terrified and unwound...like peeling back layers of an onion and breaking him down one near assassination at a time. Also it allows her to lead him in the direction she wants him to go in if he thinks she is a tried and true ally.
At the moment Jamie is on his side... but I'm still undecided about her ultimate motivations. I actually like her as a character and would feel bad if I decided she should betray Alex.
Why do I feel like the store manager is the one behind it all? I mean, I could be wrong (as I usually am with stuff like this), but all the evidence so far is pointing to him being either the ex friend or someone working closely with the ex friend.
Looking forward to hearing you latest entry, Doc. You should really consider finding a publisher, and creating a book from your short stories. I think it'd be a great opportunity for everyone, seeing as how sparse the genre seems nowadays (at least in terms of physical copies), both growing your audience, and also being a potential source of revenue. It's a win - win, if you ask me. Anywho, thanks for the story and narration as always. -Ben
Love this story so far! My only question is why he automatically believed the manager who seemed to know way too much... And without any real evidence or proof. Seems like this might turn out to be a psychotic episode of some kind
Felt like bad writing that his manager saw the cameras tracking the main character and immediately knew it was for this obscure dark web murder game, he also just so happened to know everything about.
In some ways I do agree, but at the same time, I can imagine the manager knew about this for some time. he may have had his reasons to tell Alex, but he didn't reveal them.
looking forward to the next installment. this honestly reminds me of a song I listen to now and then. It's called "Fight for My Survival" by the Phantoms. If this a TV show, this is the song I would use for its theme song
The plot reminds me of the movie called Guns Akimbo. the plot in that movie is about a man who is forced to participate in a death match that streams online. I like this one 👍🏻
Maybe Jamie has been with Marcus and Alex has been with Sarah.Thats the simplest reason,why they want them to hurt them like this. But I really want to know the reason. Thank you for the good story. Greetings from Sweden.
Lovely story Doc, can't wait for continuation.
I've been enjoying listening to so many of your original compositions! The mystery/suspense genre works well with your style, and I'm looking forward to seeing where this goes. If you plan on returning to this particular piece, I would recommend editing out some of the mentions of determination to survive and strengthening of their bond, especially toward the last section of the story. As cliched as this advice may sound, you'd benefit from a little more "show" and and little less "tell" for these moments. A change in posture, a certain set of the jaw, a softer voice, a bit of scenery for metaphor, etc. can do a lot of heavy lifting.
I literally can’t wait for the next part to come out!!👏 I’m so excited to find out what’s going to happen next!!
On another note, I’m not as young as some of the other listeners are and I need my kids to explain how my phone works half the time, with that being said; if they’re using cameras and cell phones to track the people they’re trying to kill, couldn’t they just hide out in a cabin somewhere there isn’t any wifi or cameras to find them? I dunno, it’s just a thought…
Ok Doc, well you’ve certainly got my attention! And it’s holding firm so let’s get those sequels up and your audience fulfilled! So so many questions that still remain and if there are as many more parts to the story to come then I might just have to be more patient for the answers! Not my strongest suit. Aside from that it was an excellent story with multiple twists and turns that I can foresee happening much, much, more often in the future. So keep up the amazing work and deliver it to us all in the style only the great Dr Creepen can!! 👏👏👏👏👏👏
You're a hell of a good narrator and just as good as a writer. I look forward to every notification on UA-cam. Thank you again for what you do!
DOC - I’m loving your eloquent and descriptive writing style!! Your personal writing style goes perfectly with your style of narration. Great work!! Great Story!!!
Thanks again!
I took quite a break from listening to pastas because I've literally listened to them ALL. All of yours, creeps and lighthouses (the other channels kind of suck by comparison ngl, yall got insane talent, and you definitely put insane work + talent.) I got back into them and listened to them ALL AGAIN, but forgot about this channel sadly. But boy am I happy to have remembered it. You only had 30k subs back when I listened, but now you have 300K!!!! Well earned, well deserved. Also the fact you narrate whole ass novels! I'll never be bored at work again!
I also want to quickly point out I've been subbed with notifs this whole time but I guess youtube shadowbanned you from my feed for some reason.
That was an incredible story tonight. It is full of suspense and intrigue. I'm looking forward to more of this mystery. I really enjoy your narration. Job well done. Have a splendid weekend 🤗 ❤🌟
Glad you enjoyed it!
I’ve been listening to you for about 3 years and your stories got me through army basic training I was looking forward to every Sunday when I’d use my 30 mins of phone time to listen
First! Thank you again!!! Keep it coming! I can’t wait for the next couple of parts! Trust no one!
Fantastic as always, Doc! Have a lovely weekend!😊
Thank you Dr. C. REALLY NEEDED THIS
Happy weekend, Dr. Creepen! Thank you for the start of another great series- I can't wait for the next installment 🫣
I really liked this one, and can’t wait to hear what’s next! (I don’t trust Jamie, though!)
Hell yeah doc, this one kicks ass! Can't wait for part two!
Just saw you out there going to sit back and listen , thanks for being there❤❤
Thanks for listening :)
Dr C, I believe I've heard you mention you having a position within a Uni...? I have to wonder whether you may be a Professor of Language Arts, Composition, or something within that field? Your use of the spoken word, while definitely creepy, is often eloquent. Almost poetry, from the imagery you invoke while setting up the story, to the rhythm of words within each line, your original writings are pleasing to the ear, despite the horror content. Keep giving us more, your stories are quite intriguing.
Wahooo! McCorkie is on the job!! This one had a good balance of all the elements! I can't wait to hear the rest! You have been a busy bee!
Why wouldn't he ask the manager how he knew. How would the manager know unless he's in on it.
I'm going to sit back, maybe not grab a drink since I'm enjoying this laying down in bed, and most definitely listening. Thanks Dr. for yet another weapon in my arsenal against insomnia, those smooth and husky vocal eminations.
What a great story!! Can’t wait for more
Eagerly awaiting the next chapter😢
I don't like this story very much. Mainly because the decisions made by the main character border on ridiculous. I can see not notifying police immediately for fear of not being believed, but after he escaped a few attacks & gained possession of the guys phone, all he'd have to do then is photo the guy, grab the dudes wallet (along with his phone, of course) & go to the police. You now have evidence, other than the word of that manager guy.
Afraid the cops are in on it? Just tell them that your lawyer friend (whose name you will not disclose to anyone) has already made copies of everything, (except manager's statements) with orders to release the story to other law enforcement agencies & media, should you disappear.
& Does the character have any friends or family that could be at risk, or could file a missing person report with police?
So dude just goes on the run telling no one, knowing the possibility of having to kill one of the "hunters?" He's probably wanted by police for assault & theft already & only half way into the story.
If everyone did the right thing immediately we,'d have no horror stories or creepypastas cause everyone would go straight to the police or buy an AK-47! Besides there are more people than you realize that do the dumbest things, over and over. I'm a 911 operator and you would be shocked how many people put themselves in danger and many more that don't think!
Hi Doc! I appreciate your writing, but I was having difficulty getting into tonight's story. I will try again tomorrow when I'm more alive. Have a fabulous weekend everyone!🤗💜🕷
I really thought Jamie was going to be a part of the game. Though it seems as if she is on his side and that they are being hunted together, it would be an awesome twist if she manufactured the "list" he read of those he thinks is after the two of them and Jamie used this as a way to experience the "hunt" alongside him and watch him suffer from a more intimate position (right alongside him). Maybe he killed a loved one by mistake a long time ago? Maybe something he did or said changed her life for the worst? She came into some money to enact her intricate revenge plan, and he is none the wiser? I don't know. I just really thought the girl he's running around with is really the one who orchestrated all this then got herself a front row seat in the action running around with him, watching him slowly devolve and become more and more terrified and unwound...like peeling back layers of an onion and breaking him down one near assassination at a time. Also it allows her to lead him in the direction she wants him to go in if he thinks she is a tried and true ally.
At the moment Jamie is on his side... but I'm still undecided about her ultimate motivations. I actually like her as a character and would feel bad if I decided she should betray Alex.
Why do I feel like the store manager is the one behind it all? I mean, I could be wrong (as I usually am with stuff like this), but all the evidence so far is pointing to him being either the ex friend or someone working closely with the ex friend.
Looking forward to hearing you latest entry, Doc. You should really consider finding a publisher, and creating a book from your short stories. I think it'd be a great opportunity for everyone, seeing as how sparse the genre seems nowadays (at least in terms of physical copies), both growing your audience, and also being a potential source of revenue. It's a win - win, if you ask me.
Anywho, thanks for the story and narration as always.
-Ben
OMGawd MOREEE! lol luv this story tho. Who has a feeling that homegurl is with him just to bring him to the ops? I hope not tho😅
Great story! Well done... cant wait for more❤😊❤😊
Thank you! 😊
Great story for my Saturday morning thank you Dr C.❤
My pleasure!
Love this story so far! My only question is why he automatically believed the manager who seemed to know way too much... And without any real evidence or proof. Seems like this might turn out to be a psychotic episode of some kind
Yes... I didn't really go into that as much as I could have. He did believe the scenario without questioning it, to be honest.
Enjoyed the story (so far), but a Friday night cliffhanger!?!?!?!💔 LOL! Thanks Dr!!😊
Felt like bad writing that his manager saw the cameras tracking the main character and immediately knew it was for this obscure dark web murder game, he also just so happened to know everything about.
Bad writing? ,;:,,....()"" means something.
He's the someone close
In some ways I do agree, but at the same time, I can imagine the manager knew about this for some time. he may have had his reasons to tell Alex, but he didn't reveal them.
The manager is running it and bet this guy will win.
I feel the same tbh
looking forward to the next installment. this honestly reminds me of a song I listen to now and then. It's called "Fight for My Survival" by the Phantoms. If this a TV show, this is the song I would use for its theme song
So when is part 2 of the web game? I'm waiting anxiously.
Nobody will ever come close to being a better narrator in my opinion. D.O.C is a league above the rest🎉😊
Thanks!
Very kind of you!
Awesome story backed by even better narration!
"Strengthen(ed) their bond and their resolve" counter... 7 and counting! 😂😂😊
That was awesome, I love a story about the dark web and being hunted. That was fun .
Awww! I want more 😢
Eeek. You left me hanging. Want to know the rest
❤❤❤Amazing Dr. Thankyou again!❤❤❤
Dunno who this Darius fellow is but you need to read more of their stuff. ;)
Ty for the sleep Dr! 😄 I love dark web stories plz do more!!
You are great keep them coming.
Thanks, will do!
Keep it up,doc! Ur doing awesome!! Btw,i dont mind ur waffling😁
😊 love it. Want to know what happens next
thanks Doc - have a great weekend
Bummer whens the next part?
The plot reminds me of the movie called Guns Akimbo. the plot in that movie is about a man who is forced to participate in a death match that streams online.
I like this one 👍🏻
Excellent 👏👏👏👍👍👍❤️
Thank You dear Doctor 🙌🏻💜✨
Don't mind if i do! Thank you : )
Loved it! Thanks Doc
Stalked by dark web neck beards...AHHHGGG.
Maybe Jamie has been with Marcus and Alex has been with Sarah.Thats the simplest reason,why they want them to hurt them like this. But I really want to know the reason. Thank you for the good story. Greetings from Sweden.
Please link the parts. Now have to wait for the other parts..
🖐💖💖🖑
Thanks! 😊
Welcome!
Cmon make it so you can't cheat the thing ffs
Is it meant to be Dark Web? Lol
I think it's interchangeable
The deep dark web.🙃
The Game would have been a better title. UA-cam Creepypastas have such crappy titles!
Love it Doc. Your performances are always just that much greater when you are more invested in the subject. Lol. Lead on MacDuff. 🔎🔎🔎