“My past is everything I failed to be.” ~Fernando Pessoa, The Book of Disquiet 🌹 Follow the artists - links are in the description box. 🎧 Tracklist: 00:00 Kayou. - give me a purpose 03:15 amies - pretty babe 05:26 ✞ enjyng ✞ - U Should Run 07:12 DNAKM - disappear 08:19 teqkoi x snøw x rxseboy - trapped 09:58 max fry - lose you w/ ali fry 12:24 Shae Delea - A Lost Promise 14:51 Laeland x Teqkoi x Essence - People Change 17:33 Shae Delea - Angela 19:52 nilöwh. - resonance 21:50 ohji - everstone [prod. n o r m a l] 23:20 Zaini - it's not the same anymore (ft. Vict Molina) 25:59 Swik - The girls are getting sick (with sofia mills) 28:22 Shae Delea - Letter from a Crow 💕 LIKE AND SUBSCRIBE if you liked this video! 🔔 Click the Bell to get notified when I upload! ✖️ Note that I haven't monetized the channel, so any ads you may see are from copyright claims which I cannot control. Therefore I apologize for the inconvenience.
wonderful tracks :) Love how you quoted a Portuguese poet.. wonder if your Portuguese.. and tanks for providing the track list, will be listening to this on a journey
Just discovered this and wow the comments really hit home because just like me, others are struggling, feel hopeless, and are in a tough part in life where it doesn't seem it will end, but the support from other viewers is so inspirational. i cant promise anything, but i keep hearing that it will be ok. i dont know about for me, but it might be worth it for you to keep pushing forward.
Thanks, nice piece for all! Sounds good n light, best elegant lofi mix music tune. Peace n calm the mind n heart.Delightful singing n all the great! Absolutely love the combination of sounds n music! Amazing!😎🎧
I got on my PS4 noticing my boyfriend was online and in a party alone, I joined him to hear him crying and listening to this music. I am now listening to it and I’m now crying.
às vezes eu me sinto muito triste, mas está tudo bem, porque o dia de ontem passou e agora está tudo tão legal. está tudo bem, eu juro, pode ser um momento ruim mas, por mais que tudo pareça se repetir, as coisas vão ficando cada vez melhores, está tudo bem ^^
I think we fail to account for emotion. We can pretend we don’t feel a thing, but that’s not true. And in this world ruled by cold calculating business we are never taught the right things unless we are lucky. But we do learn. Usually after things have been broken, when it would have been better if it hadn’t happened like that. If only we didn’t become next in line for abuse because we noticed and ended up in the crossfire, if only planet earth was sorted. Unfortunately that is not how it is. I can’t predict how this will go, too many disappointments. But I feel I have to cross the rubicon to salvage what is left of a broken heart. I know I might be putting my life on the line, but I could be wrong and would hate myself if I ignored love. People lie though. But at least then I will know. What comes next is on you.
All the comments are so depressing should I be listening to this said cus rn it’s 4pm and I’m just chillin cleaning my room to some chill songs🤷🏻♀️🤷🏻♀️🤷🏻♀️
It's really depressing to see how we are all alone when we have the same feelings and can understand each other perfectly. How comes destiny keeping us so far apart from the others to suffer in loneliness when we could stay in the same dark box being friends.
I started crying, because lately I've been feeling like I need a purpose. I have a hard time getting up in the morning because everything feels pointless and I feel useless.
Vohasiiv trust me one day your going to find what you wake up excited to do, what u can’t fall asleep because it makes you excited. Just keep pushing and you’ll make it through.
Everything goes in steps so to be happy there might be alot steps to go But your soul got a plan for you So trust your feelings There might be alot wrong in your life that make you feel bad So try to live your dream
Thanks for all your feedback guys you're all amazing!💖 but I didn't make up that quote by my lonesome it was Hinata from Naruto, She defines that as true strength. Failing is not weakness but giving into failure is what makes one weak. Why do we fall?
Then remind yourself: Fear can save your life sometimes but if there is one feeling that can hurt you way worse than any other one, it is regret. Don't fight with your conscience, listen to it. Being alive is what matters. Fuck fear, save your future. Even when you do mistakes, remember that nobody cares about it more than you. So take your first step, stop complaining and to whatever it takes to do whatever you want. Remember that as long as you're alive everything is possible.
" being weak is nothing to be ashamed of, staying weak is" what you fear now will make you strong later. your baby steps will grow to leaps, your wails of failure to screams of victory, your tears to trophies. you may not now, but you will. as long as you know this, it will be remember that it will be and will will it and it will be good luck my friend, tears to trophies
Tofu nah gotta support the artist that drew it. He linked them in the description and after following them & visiting their merch, they have the hoodie that the artist made. Should be supporting the artist
This mix hits me hard, for various reasons. My brother got hit by a car 4 years ago, me and my family were devastaded, he was the brother who I was more closer with. Since then, I became more and more like him, trying to make my mom happy. "You resemble a lot like your brother" she said in multiple ocasions, but after a while, I started to have a identity crisis, where I didn't know if I liked something because my brother liked it or it was me, I started to forget the person I was before, it got to the point that I took the same career as my brother for college, even though I don't like it that much, my mom said to me that "You'll finish his dream", but I don't want to live being seen like my brother, I want to be my own person. I don't know how to tell my mom that this behaivor of her, comparing me to my brother, is unhealthy, without sounding rude or making her sad. So yeah, I'm not my past. I'm not my brother. Have a good day everyone, take care and stay home on these hard days. (Sorry, english is not my mother language.)
Say nothing to your mum about it , discover who you are . That way you will honour you ,your mum and your brother .Respect for being strong and good luck on your journey of discovery.
You should always follow your dreams and take your own path. Sometimes it will feel like no one understands you or supports you, but you have to get through this, because it's your life nobody else's.. So maybe she will get sad, but she will be happy in the future because she will see you happy. Hopefully I could help you a bit.. And I wish you all the best. If you need someone to talk with, feel free. (I know we don't know each other, but I really wanna help people). Have a great day 😁
I’ve always been a chill guy, never held any grudges or remorse towards anyone. I’m not sociable, I spent my freshmen year alone to an extent. However, it all changed when I met her. When she moved to my biology class, just a few desks away from me. I didn’t pay too much attention at first, I was always so enrolled into my classes that some people could’ve considered me a nerd. It wasn’t until she asked such a simple question, such nice and smooth and overall normal question that locked my sight to her. She asked me “what’s your name” till this day I don’t even know why it took me half a minute to answer, but anyhow. That day, I gave away everything. Mu time was devoted to just appreciate everything about her... she had these amazing hazelnut brown eyes that looked so tender, so colorful. I knew they were normal brown eyes, but... god was I in love. It’s been 4 years now, and we’re still dating up until this day. Whenever I listen to these type of songs I really cherish that speck of a moment that started everything. If you read all of this which I doubt anyone will, thanks for your time. This is something I’ve been wanting to vent ever since I knew she would be mine. edit: I cant believe it has been 4 years since I made this comment. Yet this feelings are still true to this day. We are still going strong against all adversaries. I yearn to marry this woman soon, though soon does no justice to our love. Let my story be a testament to all that love is powerful and true. Goodluck everybody !
Nice one man. I ran into a girl at college on Friday and my goodness she's beautiful and extremely cute. I was too shy to speak to her. I really hope I run into her again.
Yuno Gasai don’t get stuck into anything, appearance can be so appealing, so tearful yet so dangerous. Keep your distance, but be close. Stay quiet, but speak your feelings out loud. I hope you understand me, and don’t fall for deceiving actions. A mans true sin is to fall in love, for love is the only thing that could break a man...
Standing above his first or last enemy, Achilles looked towards the desert Sun. He desired to yell, yet his spirit stayed slow at the river of Styx; how many souls flow from that river, and to where? Scream at God, they chant. God. The Author is the One who wields the Master (s)word(s).
I was young and a fool, bullying one kid, over and over. Hurting him, tipping and pushing him over for years, I don’t understand why he never fought back, he just smiled. Left him around 6th grade met back around high school, knew who I was yet he was still nice to me. I toned down and remembered what I had done. I’ve regretted everything. All of the terrible things i’ve done, to such a pure hearted boy. Treated me with kindness, even after our past, he looks at me like equals. It pisses me off how childish I was to do something like that.
Take care of him, I was just like him and I wouldnt stop smiling cause I thought I didn't worth anything. He probably lived things even more difficult than you bullying him and he thinks it's normal to be treat like that. Sorry for my grammar, im not english.
I had people who bullied me terribly to the point of suicide. The only thing I would ask from them is the learn from you’re mistakes and teach you’re children how to be a good to person. Don’t let it repeat. You’re a good person for recognizing what you did. Don’t let your past hang over your head. We’ve all done messed up stuff. We’re only human and we make a lot of mistakes. It’s okay ❤️
most of the time you only blame yourself for blaming yourself. it takes time to accept the past. But keep in mind that in those cases where you acted as you did, you were doing the right thing for yourself at the moment. I don't know you or your past, but you have changed and change can be very positive. Only you lay the blame for the mistakes you think you made. The "mistakes" do not describe the person you are now. Maybe u don't think so, but there are No mistakes in this world.
Just lost another job, it feels like my whole world is coming apart all around me and im left to just watch it burn, how many more failures will it take to just live
@@joecortesi2894 honestly terrible days are unavoidable but what happens next is up to you - just try and stay positive okay ? sometimes all you need to do is stop for a moment. take a deep breath. and relax . just let everyting flow past you for a moment
@@azi.q Myself, really. Was in a bit of a dark place some years back. I was disillusioned with the world and all, but then I found lofi hip-hop and chillhop. Before I knew it, I was listening to it daily as I wrote stories and poems. Even now, I'm listening to Chilled Cow radio as I write.
Damn, same thing. The comments are "we're all here for a reason (...)". Yeah, I'm just here to listen to good music, what's with the waves of depressed people ? Not that I mind, it's nice to see a place where they can share thoughts and help each others, but 99% of the comments are about depression... this is quite depressing 🤔
"They say humans are social animals, they can't live alone. But you can live pretty well by yourself. I tell ya...instead of feeling alone in a group, it's better to have real solitude all by yourself." - Faye Valentine (Cowboy Bebop)
I'm tired of being alone even though my kindness has been being taken for granted. How is it someone can be so highly spoken of yet i can't find happiness? I'm turning 29 next month and I'm just getting tired of crying nearly every night because i just can't catch a break. I have so much love and compassion to give but I'm only used from what I've been given at birth....a heart is a fickle thing to to play with yet it's humanity favorite game. If you're still reading this, you've just gotten a glimpse into someone's soul and i thank you for giving the time to get to know me. Good night.
I've been there, believe me you're not alone. My mom says It's best to be alone than to be in bad company. Work on yourself first, become the person you want to date. Oh and don't base your happiness off of one person or finding love, I made that mistake and got hurt. Stay strong
i feel you, i'm living the same since so many years... and i can tell you that you'll fine someone for you. if i could give you one advice, it would be this one : get out of you home, meet new people (at parties or things like that for exemple). sometimes, the person for us is not as far from us as we think ; the hardest part is to find the courage to do the first step and talk to the person you have some crush on, or who just look perfect to you. (i'm mean, you know, this girl/guy at this party you wanted to talk to but you thought there will never be something between you.) next time, just smile, look at her/him, and try you best to establish some contact. and even if you are persuaded to look like a strange person, keep it up that way. maybe the person in front of you is looking for a person like you, who is very sensitive and who have a mountain of love to share. i actually don't know how to help you anymore, then... just act like you feel inside, be you, the real you. i hope this will be able to help you, even a little bit. i'm sorry if my english is not perfect, i'm french then i don't speak it perfecty. have a nice day, and i hope things to become better for you!
I know exactly what you’re feeling, I’m 20 now but I’ve been feeling like this for 3 years or more... But I know that things happen and we just don’t need to have expectations about life’s events. We just need to be patient and keep on living, meeting new people. We just need to be ourselves. Be patient, you’re not alone.
you seem to be a nice person. you are not the only one in this situation. there are people that really don"t have luck in love, because they are good people and not everybody plays fair. They are lots of ways of giving love, like art for exemple. perhaps you can find hapiness without relying on one person? only you can find the aswer.
3 things I want in life are to make my parents proud, give my family a stable life, and give my son a father to look up to. i fucked up a lot when i was younger. was in and out of jail and placements for most of my life. finally really started to get my shit together about 6 years ago, but its hard to deal with knowing how much time i wasted hurting other people. i have a 3 year old son now. i just want to be a role model to him and point him in the right direction. i dont want him to go through what i did but i have to work so much right now sometimes its hard to spend time with him and be there to steer him in the right direction. i dont ever want my son to think his dad wasnt there.
Well... im sure you will find a father. You are a nice person. If you don't think that that take my quiz Are you a human? □Yes □No Do you have feelings? □Yes □No Do you want to be happy? □Yes □No Do you want others to be happy? □Yes □No Are you trying your best? □Yes □No Have you been very sad? □Yes □No The ones who go through the most, are always the nicest. You don't want others to be sad like you, so you always put on a smile, even if it means you have to fake it.
as long as he knows you love him to the ends of the earth, it won’t matter how far away you are or for how long. he will know that no matter what he is always and forever completely loved by you.
First thought that came into my mind when i read this comment: "Uhm, hey. looks like you've got a katana in your stomach? do you need a hospital or something?" "Huh? oh no it's fine, that's always just kinda been there, don't worry bout it" "I mean are you sure? Cause it looks kinda painful..." "No no, it's alright. Well I'm gonna go play football now, so, see ya" "o-oh...okay? uhm...bye?"
"Your story may not have such a happy beginning, but that does not make you who you are. It is the rest of your story, who you choose to be..." -That goat lady from Kungfu Panda 2
searching for my purpose, Most times I feel the wall, Wondering if its ok to be small Tears hit the pavement, Frames capture it all From the times before I met you To the days I kept fishing Waiting on whats sublime Trying to find what im gifted with Actualization placed me into maddness When I realized the real me was powerless The sheep that follow the wolf Became my brothers to find the light So backward, yet only moving forward in time. I strip the vail of uncetainty Strip essence of the ego One more deep breath One more try to let go
A person very dear to me has had a rough past he’s warned me about, and it’s true some people tell me that I shouldn’t have anything to do with this person but he tells me that he wishes he never did any of the stuff he did and I tell him his past doesn’t define him and if anyone is struggling with this learn from your past, don’t burden yourself.
My mom just came home.. it’s 2 am for me (she’s always at birthday party’s or some other party’s or clubs), my dad is screaming to me every day for no reason.. And now I’m listening to this to escape the reality..
I'm so sorry , my mom and my father do not agree when my father come back home bc we want him in our house , they always in fight , my mother was always in her room . But now he live the house . All this to tell you that ur situation is difficult but not unchangeable , I know ur tired of this but you know what there is only one person who can change it it's Jesus , He said '' Come to me all you who are tired and heavy I will give you rest " Matthew 11: 28 Come to him and let him change ur life . ( If u wanna talk or something else , I'm here ☺😊
i'm better than i ever was. but somehow, it feels worse than before. maybe it's because everything feels so mundane and boring now. maybe it's because i'm finally aware that i'm missing something. i think i'm lonely. i have lots of friends, everywhere i go, no matter where i am. good, trustworthy friends. but i always feel alone anyway.
do you really feel lonely? Is it maybe some other kind of emotion that you mistake for loneliness? It MAY be that you feel that it is loneliness because it occurs when you are alone, but actually it could be another emotion that occurs when you are not distracted. It could be anything, most probably a feeling of emptiness? Well bro i know that feeling very well since i felt like that for a long time during puperty and early adulthood ( im 20 atm ). What helped ME was philosophy and meditation. Kinda made me clear my mind and get the right thoughts. Altought it took for pretty long i'm not feeling that depressing emptiness inside me anymore.
I wish I wasn't my past. I started to get more and more confident when I was 17-18 but that crumbled again around 20. Fast forward 3 years and my crushing depression and anxiety are back. Got the MJ/alcohol/nicotine addiction bonus package aswell.
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"I don't think people always choose. I think its an innate drive that forces the lull of depression to hang in the air like extreme humidity on a cloudy day. Whether the act is committed by the individual, its not always their conscious choice. Realising the futility of life is really sad. Its almost like living already knowing the beginning and the end. A possible detachment from it; an escape - is gratitude. Everything is held by balance and for every negative we will learn a positive from it eventually; we will grow. I will always be grateful for the music and the messages within the music which perhaps now can be contextualised and aid the understanding of many, and possibly start the journey to realisation for others. I hope you have a nice day :) Keep being inspired X" - This is something I read a couple years ago and found it really encouraging; I hope it helps.
Your subconscious is screaming at you to listen, your “shadow” is trying to tell you something. Search and study Frederick neitzche. He will show you your potential and what your subconscious wants.
No one is their past; the very minute you regret what you've done you change. Fuck your past, the only way you become your past is if you dwell on it. I hope you defeat your depression, I know what its like; I was depressed for years but I am better now. I feel so happy all the time like I am going to burst, I am telling you it definitely gets better, you just need to realize the strength you hold; the world is yours, you just need to reach out and touch it, just go from there. I will pray to God in heaven for you, good day. ~♥
LIFE IS ALL ABOUT = jokes N laughs, music\movies, friends, family, a bike, a laptop, bedroom, chocolates, ice-cream, food, coffee\Tea, whiskey, water, LSD, weed and and a fucking lighter. (a cigarette once in a while is alright, just don't promote its use to others). EVERYTHING EXISTS AND OCCUPY SPACE, WHO GIVES A FUCK WHAT THE PURPOSE IS, IF ANYTHING IS TOO IMPORTANT TO HAVE A PURPOSE TO FULFILL, DON'T WORRY. LIFE WILL FIND ITS WAY. JUST LIVE AND DIE PEACEFULLY GUYS ;) :JINNY
@@ezarell6033 imagine getting the same from your girl of 2 years. Thats my story, but, some have had more years than that. The only way to find the one you love is to pursue yourself first. If not you will wind up appealing to a codependant nature. Shes out there, and shes walking a path just like you. She who is not named, the one who will help support your light, just like you would her. Shes out there, dont stop believing.
sanity is one of those things you dont miss it until it leaves you. the ability to be dumbfounded and awestruck by your enviroment is a gift to most. there are few who cant see life as simple but as a complex network of events past, present, and future, who doubt their every move in hopes of changing the outcome for the best but in the end it all ends up the same. overthinking is a curse on the few people that live in this world. they cant live like everyone else and end up going insane.
Haha got you there, no one liked me when I was little so I found a way to feel less lonely at the cost of slowly draining my own sanity till I lost it for large amounts of time before managing to get a good grasp of it. My first solution was probably one of the biggest mistakes I made, as I made a personality based on other peoples which later led me to use fake ones nearly 24/7 to the point where now I don’t even know who the real me is anymore or why I’m here.
It seems like krama has gotten you in the back.. Don't dwell on it too long it'll will hurt more, just move forward and never forget your old actions while making new ones ok?
Having love and respect for people now is the only redemption for past actions that can't be changed. Karma is a bitch, you get what you put out in the world.
@Pointless Channel I'm not saying sorry to fix the past, it's for them to forgive what I've done to them or at least they'll know I am sorry. If you are wondering. Yes I did apologize in front of everyone I I bullied.
"I was my past. I am my present. I will be my future. Everything that was and has yet to be is what makes us our own self now. Neither aspect makes a person without the other." -Some tired dude listening to this
Well everyone, it's been fun but I think it's time for me to go. I'd like to say this before I go though, you matter and I love you. I don't know you, I don't need to in order to know I love you. If you need me, I'm always here for you. I'll always be in your corner rooting for you, I promise. Until we meet again :)
Japan.... I've wanted to go for so long.. Even though I'm only 12 :/. I just love the perfect balance and chaos in Japan... The overwhelming amount of aesthethic.. The feeling of walking through the street of Tokyo at night. It hits me so hard whenever I think about that there are 3 years until i finish my school (In Denmark) and I've wanted to go for an exchange year to Japan as soon as i get out of school. I'm currently also learning japanese.. Now that I'm in quarantine I study my japanese almost every day.... Idk why I wrote this, thank you if you read this :/
You are doing it right. Follow your dreams, and remember do not dream about having stuff, dream about following your passion, picture yourself doing what you love... and the rest will follow. Edit: I love Japanese culture, and also started learning Japanese during the pandemic, Hajimemashite... but 30 years latter than you. You are going to do great. Good Luck.
It's been Year's now fighting this thought of Suicide and when it came time I couldn't do it. I feel as if I'm just stuck in a cycle of despair, I know it's just part of life but How much pain will it be? how many tears will We have to cry out? And even when I try to speak the Truth it always erases itself, therefore, defined as a lie, I always question if the life I'm living right now is the vision I'm not supposed to see, all I can say is, To all of you live your life in peace they may not believe you changed but don't tell them with words, show them with Actions. History doesn't talk about quitters so like me Don't quit.
I'm not sure if I misinterpreted your comment or not so I thought I might as well leave this here either way, in case anyone needs it. (sorry if its stupid or cheesy). For what it's worth, I hope that one day all of you out there will begin to see the small happy things again. A colorful sunny day in the middle of all the colorless dull ones.. I can't say that I understand what all of you are going through, but I hope your days become a little bit lighter, if not brighter. And that you'll hear that one song on the radio that makes you feel even a bit happy. A joke that makes you chuckle even though its stupid, a yellow flower, or even how the rain feels on your skin. Please keep on living. I believe in you.
"I am not my past. I am not the bully I once was thinking nothing of it when I did what I did until I realized as I got older it was not right. There is no justifying what I did because every reason or point I think of sounds like an excuse. I accept the actions I have done and did past to now, I know the bad ones are things I cannot take back and are also something I cannot allow to become more baggage on my heavy and tired body. I can't. I won't. I understand after being bullied years later what it felt like and I would never wish that upon anyone. I am not my past. "I have grown up in one of the most subtle and hard to see ways of being abused as a child to even now as I am an adult. Part of me remembers how those moments I blame myself for 'acting out' were not right. I didn't know it was okay to stand up for yourself when I tried and succeeded in a moment I didn't know I needed to be heard and know my ground was there. I may never get through to him, but he does not hold that power over me anymore. My voice is stronger. I am stronger. I am not going to be quiet anymore. I am not my past. "Strength. It's a word of many meanings. Built strong. Armor casing us in to protect us rom outside enemies or things that could hurt us. Standing back up when you fall once or many times. I was not a strong person in my past. I was brittle like egg shells, similar to the ones I had to walk across every waking moment around him. As years have gone by, there were those better moments I felt what being strong really was. But, also the ones that tore me apart limb from limb. Today I have a clearer perspective on what it means for me and others. I know for the average person you see walking down the sidewalk past you, it means differently to them and that's the definition for them. Its different. For me, it is making sure I keep moving forward with my head up high, eyes forward, and not looking back. I can hold back tears if I have to, but letting out all those emotions truthfully isolated or with trusted friends is also being strong. You show strength in trusting them helping. I am stronger now than ever, and pretty soon I'm going to hit my limit, but that's okay. I am not my past. "I am not the scared little girl anymore. I am not my past. I will not allow others to belittle my actions, words, or every single trait and part of my being. I am not my past. I am going to reach out for help when things get scary and I cannot handle it on my own. I am not my past, the one who was afraid to or didn't know it was okay to do. "I. am. not. my. past."
Holy moly, I have no words. This is one of the best mixes I've heard in a long, long time. This is amazing, from the art selection to the music selection. 10/10
I find myself back here again, I think to myself "there is no "better" version of myself". The people who mattered to me are gone, but then again I was the most horrible person to be called a friend, even with promise of getting better for the sake of those I hurt it wasn't enough, it didnt matter, whatever damage had been done was done, i questioned myself it I truly am better, no matter who walks into my life now, they will think i always been this version of me they call a good person, i can be called whatever anyone wants but I'll never be told I'm a "better" person, because they are gone, and if I have became a better person, why couldn't this "better" version of me save the friendships he once had, or was the old me so horrible that this "better" version of couldn't do anything to save it.
I'm sorry but… just wanted to tell someone, but well actually tell no one. Just writing this in hopes that maybe you will see it, just by a miracle. I'm sorry I cut ties with you at such a bad time, when you were probably suicidal, your best friend died and you couldn't even make it to his funeral, since you were abroad, and you probably felt really depressed and as of now I'm not even sure if you're alive, but I just couldn't, I liked you a lot, you knew that, but I just couldn't stop thinking about you, whatever I was doing, I found myself thinking about you in one way or another, and it got really depressing after more than a year… I was just trying to get my life back together since it was a mess and I almost did the same thing our friend did… I'm so sorry. But if you saw this by some miracle, I would love to hear from you and or see you, at least one last time, just wanna know you're still okay...
Life is painful as it is, but all we need to do is to get used to it, although it will break your heart, and make you cry and the tears that flow from your eyes is burning your skin, You think about yourself, parents, family, friends and love one, You tried to calm down, but after a while you are started to loses your mind, You are going insane, You grab a knife and put it onto chest, but you couldn't do so, as if the something is stopping you for doing so, because you are still something, you are special, and then you heard a voice whisphering into your ears, "You shouldn't gave up yet, You can do something that no one know you can, You must stay alive, if not they will cry, they will feel sad" You began imagine someone on your head, and you started to cry. The knife you hold fell from your hand, You began to loses your mind out by the madness, tears never stop flowing from your eyes, Couple of months has passed and you started to change, You decided to do something that is worthwhile you decided to think positively, You decided to be calm and relaxed, You keep moving foward, Keep the past as memories, You began to plan for your futures, Then you stand up and swear that you will change to be better, You began watch the billion stars on the nightskies, And you decided too change, To a better person, You began to think positively, You learn from your mistakes, You start to learn many things each day, You faced your own fear, You comfort yourself, Then you start to be more friendly to other people, Slowly each day, Smiles is starting to pictured in your face, Tears that were always flowing from your eyes, No longer burn your skins, You are no longer sad, depressed,stressed. YOU CHANGED, With all of those painful life, You use them, To help other people, You used the experience, To comfort other people, The people that you helped, Feel grateful to you, You started to make people smile, You are finally free, from the darkness that is consuming your heart, You are free, No more tears, You are now a beautiful blossom flowers, But no need to stop here, You can do more than this, You can achieve something more, Thank you... "HamanoKaito"
its been 3 years since i discovered this playlist every now and then when i feel sad i come back to it, thank you for the choice of these songs rly helped me wit em :)
I really can’t help reminiscing about my past when listening to this. did not look at my likes..n I met this girl about 3 years ago whilst I was on my gap year. My friends and I just arrived in Sydney, Australia and as we were just about to go to our hotel, I met this white haired waiter with ocean eyes in a cafe. I remember how we caught eyes for an instance and everything around us just stood still. We got each others details and nearly every night I would wait outside that cafe until 11:00 pm just to see her and walk her home. I didn’t want her to know I was only there for a couple of weeks so I lied and said my family just moved here. We finally got a whole day together no thanks to the busy schedule she had. We went to a local theme park and the last thing she wanted to go on was the Ferris wheel. I don’t know if she planned it or not but as we got to the top, we could see the sunset simmering down on everything. She turned to me and held my hand, she looked down and said “I really like you, like really really like you”. I knew what she was trying to say so I took a leap and said “I love you too”. She buried her head on my chest and held me tightly as the Ferris wheel took its course... We hung out every chance we got and she even introduced me to her family. I think I broke her heart when I told her I’ll be leaving in a couple of days. She gave me a cold shoulder every time I saw her from then. I told myself that I wouldn’t be surprised if she didn’t give me a proper send off, not as boyfriend and girlfriend, but as true lovers so I was shocked to see her waiting for me in the airport. We caught eyes just like the time we first met. She said her farewells and made me promise her that I would come back. It’s been about 3 years now and I’m starting to feel self conscious. I keep on thinking that I have left it too late and she’s moved on but for some reason, I know she’s still waiting. I’ve just graduated from my university in Toronto and I’m planning on surprising her next month. Wish me luck... Update 1: Thank you for all the support. Its confirmed I’m heading back to Sydney in 6 days instead of a month! All of you have motivated me and now I’m much closer to her than I was 4 days ago when I first shared my story, next update will probably be when I’m with her, hopefully. I’ve just brought tickets and I’m heading to LAX on Tuesday next week. If I haven’t updated you all in at least 8 days then I guess it’s safe to say that my experience of feeling lonely, feeling forgotten and feeling ashamed was a lesson to never let your soulmate go, even if you have to go through hell and back. Well, goodbye for now... Update 3: Hello everyone, this will be a short update. Don’t be worried though, yes I’m in Sydney, and no I haven’t been able to meet her yet, this was expected anyway. I went back to the cafe I met her in seeing if she was still working there. Turns out, she quit her job a couple of months after I parted with her 3-4 years ago. Her boss said she just wasn’t the same after I left, she would always turn up late to her shifts and would be rude to customers, I know I’m the cause of that. I went back to her parents house if she was there, when they opened the door they recognised me straight away. Her mother started crying whilst her dad gave me the death stare. He said my full name and gave me a hug. He said after I left, she became more motivated to follow her own dreams so she moved away with only the money she saved up from her work from the cafe. They said she told them she was going Melbourne. I had dinner at their house and we talked about everything that happened to her after I moved away, how she cut her long luscious hair, how she even dyed her hair but dyed it back because she didn’t like it brown, how she completely changed her clothes and how she started smoking for a couple of months but quit because everyone was worried about her. I know I was the cause of everything bad that happened to her. Her parents offered me to stay the night but I told them that I couldn’t burden them anymore, I also apologised to them for leaving their daughter so hastily and giving her false hope. They gave me a hug and told me that she was still waiting for me before waving me goodbye, I hope she is. Well, I’m in a hotel right now and I’m about to leave to go to Melbourne, I missed Sydney, I forgot how beautiful this place was. I keep telling myself that she’s still waiting to ease my mind. Next update will be in a couple of hours. I haven’t lost hope yet. See yall later. Update 4: it’s 3:30am in Melbourne, I’m in bed and right next to me, I can feel her breath bouncing off my skin. I’m holding back the tears and I’m struggling to text through my phone. She hasn’t changed at all... Just to think that around 12 hours a ago, I was doubting myself so much that a part of me wanted to head back home and now, the love of my life is in the same bed as me, we’re so close to touching each others hands, like in 2014. Honestly, I forgot how we met again. I just remember running into the ladies toilets in a car park convincing the girl to get out of the cubicle so she can face me again. I remember crying and smiling at the same time, I remember her punching my chest, calling me selfish whilst tears and her makeup was staining my shirt. I think I’ve never said the word sorry so many times in a minute. But now, all these things don’t matter. Lani is safe, she’s doing well and she’s with me. That’s all. All my efforts feel redeemed, all my doubts turned to happiness, all my worries has turned to just mere thoughts in my mind. I feel balanced. I feel thrilled, I feel like I can finally be at peace with myself. I’ll tell you all how I’m in this situation already in the morning. I’m tired and I just want to enjoy sleep again. Have a good one. Update 5: I guess it really is true that patience is a virtue. Having patience means having some sort of discipline, where you can command yourself to sit there and let time go past; wether it’s a couple of minutes, couple of hours, days, weeks months and even years, having patience will always end in something good. Even if you aren’t the type of person, you’ve read this much and hopefully my experiences have convinced you that something is truly out there, bigger than you or something much more meaningful. Anyways, Lani lives in a 3 bedroom apartment with 2 other people, she didn’t want me to sleep on the couch because one of her friends had sex on it with her boyfriend so I guess I didn’t have much of a choice sharing a bed a with her. It’s no big deal, after our first meet in more than 3 years, it felt like I was still on my gap year, we went to a restaurant to talk about some things. She hasn’t matured, but acts like it. Her sense of humour is still the same, her laugh has always been ugly, sounds uglier if she tries to hide it actually. But she’s developed a real sense of professionalism, which I find so attractive. She’s a primary school teacher and she’s so passionate about it. She also told me her feelings about me have been mixed but she’s starting to slowly revert back to 2014, I don’t know if that’s good or bad but I told her don’t reflect on the past, focus on the future but I’m not leaving you the same way I did 3-4 years ago, she kissed me on the cheek. She said she can see the guilt in my eyes and told me not to worry about it anymore. After that, we went back to her apartment and that was update 4. Nothing really happened yesterday, she said she’ll leave me alone for a while to let me catch up on sleep and work but I don’t want her to. My jet lag is as bad as the state of her room, but I don’t mind. Sorry this update is short. She said she wants me to go to the cinemas with her later, our first date as adults. Peace. (Had to cut update 2 out, it wasn’t important, it was just me rambling on about my troubles).
The title just fucking hit me, the past was so different. Its kinda late rn and I haven't slept early for days, I'm using a spare phone and the past is so much different. I was a damaged person and I got better, so much better Until I got into these two relationships, I got cheated on and dumped. Back then, my parents almost divorced and love just seemed impossible. I pushed people away and I did so much damage I can't forgive myself ever for, I'm now running away from so much guilt, depression and sadness. And once I got out of it It came back, and summer is over. School is starting over, new classmates and everything But yet after 2 more useless months, I'd have to leave the school After taking so much time to make friends and have a moment of calmness in my life. The neverending run comes for me, doesn't it? Now I just need to find a purpose to be here, even though it seems impossible Thanks for reading, if you made it this far
2 роки тому+1
Maybe turn to arts; create something that you would want to see through, something to hold your waking thoughts, something that makes you happy.
.. there is close relation between me from now and the person I was in past .. treating this pearson like a friend one day would be amazing .. Wish that you all have found those friends 🤞 Much love ❤
I remember religiously listening to this playlist throughout my highschool years, all the way back in the pandemic. This kind of music helped me pull through the late nights filled with homework and depression, and it's currently helping me pull through studying for my last year of university. Will always keep this one close to my heart. 💜
Lately I have been in love with a girl since I saw her, her attention was very important to me, her hair, her beautiful eyes, her skin, her essence. I decided to meet her, if it was easy for me to become her friend but I wanted to be more than that as I am not good at love, I failed. In these moments of pandemic we have been more connected and she became fond of me, she even says that I am very special to her, that she loves me and that she loves me, but I was already rejected several times by her and I knew that she does not want a relationship with anyone. but she always keeps me close to her and just by her presence or a message I feel good. But at this moment I have passed an emotional crisis and I no longer feel so safe around her. every time he tells me I love you or I love you. I feel a bit empty I don't know what the answer would be. I just come to listen to lofi and express my thoughts
"When you talk to me, you give me the impression that I won't scratch the surface." Interesting how just a simple lyric and rhythm can find a way through the cracks.
A vocês, minhas sinceras desculpas, pois escreverei isso em minha própria língua, afinal, a dor não pertence ao mundo das palavras. Eu estou, ou estava aqui, nessa noite,pensando em quantos estão tristes o suficiente para escutar esse som, mas eu gostaria que você soubesse, que apesar de tudo, não é o que o mundo faz com você o que importa, mas sim a forma como você lida com tudo. A loucura desse mundo parece sem fim, e a tristeza é como pesadas correntes que te impedem de seguir em frente, mas todos carregamos em nós a chave para a liberdade.Permita-se ser livre, e viva.
“My past is everything I failed to be.” ~Fernando Pessoa, The Book of Disquiet
🌹 Follow the artists - links are in the description box.
🎧 Tracklist:
00:00 Kayou. - give me a purpose
03:15 amies - pretty babe
05:26 ✞ enjyng ✞ - U Should Run
07:12 DNAKM - disappear
08:19 teqkoi x snøw x rxseboy - trapped
09:58 max fry - lose you w/ ali fry
12:24 Shae Delea - A Lost Promise
14:51 Laeland x Teqkoi x Essence - People Change
17:33 Shae Delea - Angela
19:52 nilöwh. - resonance
21:50 ohji - everstone [prod. n o r m a l]
23:20 Zaini - it's not the same anymore (ft. Vict Molina)
25:59 Swik - The girls are getting sick (with sofia mills)
28:22 Shae Delea - Letter from a Crow
💕 LIKE AND SUBSCRIBE if you liked this video!
🔔 Click the Bell to get notified when I upload!
✖️ Note that I haven't monetized the channel, so any ads you may see are from copyright claims which I cannot control.
Therefore I apologize for the inconvenience.
Whoa, Fernando Pessoa! És português?
wonderful tracks :) Love how you quoted a Portuguese poet.. wonder if your Portuguese..
and tanks for providing the track list, will be listening to this on a journey
"Meu passado e tudo o que eu falhei em ser"
Fernando Pessoa
@@joaovitordesaleslemosarauj5289 you mean Yugen? Because Fernando Pessoa is not from Brazil
I can't find the 3rd song, help please?
Certified depression classic
Best Lofi mix currently
Just discovered this and wow the comments really hit home because just like me, others are struggling, feel hopeless, and are in a tough part in life where it doesn't seem it will end, but the support from other viewers is so inspirational. i cant promise anything, but i keep hearing that it will be ok. i dont know about for me, but it might be worth it for you to keep pushing forward.
woow that background is so good
Thanks, nice piece for all! Sounds good n light, best elegant lofi mix music tune. Peace n calm the mind n heart.Delightful singing n all the great! Absolutely love the combination of sounds n music! Amazing!😎🎧
Who’s ever reading this come smoke a joint and just relax with me. Let’s put everything on pause and take a breather.
vaping atm xD
I need that right now 😭
i totally need that now :'(
I got on my PS4 noticing my boyfriend was online and in a party alone, I joined him to hear him crying and listening to this music. I am now listening to it and I’m now crying.
Goosebumps
Don't worry,
*Whatever happened was merely a test.*
*You have accepted that test to stand victorious to your past self.*
But these things...these demons killed my past and broke my future.
às vezes eu me sinto muito triste, mas está tudo bem, porque o dia de ontem passou e agora está tudo tão legal. está tudo bem, eu juro, pode ser um momento ruim mas, por mais que tudo pareça se repetir, as coisas vão ficando cada vez melhores, está tudo bem ^^
Wow nice music.
I think we fail to account for emotion. We can pretend we don’t feel a thing, but that’s not true. And in this world ruled by cold calculating business we are never taught the right things unless we are lucky. But we do learn. Usually after things have been broken, when it would have been better if it hadn’t happened like that. If only we didn’t become next in line for abuse because we noticed and ended up in the crossfire, if only planet earth was sorted. Unfortunately that is not how it is.
I can’t predict how this will go, too many disappointments. But I feel I have to cross the rubicon to salvage what is left of a broken heart. I know I might be putting my life on the line, but I could be wrong and would hate myself if I ignored love. People lie though. But at least then I will know.
What comes next is on you.
I WANNA FAR AWAY 😧
lofi for lifi
All the comments are so depressing should I be listening to this said cus rn it’s 4pm and I’m just chillin cleaning my room to some chill songs🤷🏻♀️🤷🏻♀️🤷🏻♀️
"Sometimes the person who you'd take a bullet for is holding the gun"
- GuyInTheCommentsGoing
ThroughSomeStuff
I can relate to this. anyone else?
@@theashamedwasp2502 ,-,
wow, that is deep meaning.......
I would have said
''Sometimes the friend you trusted with a knife, can use the knife you trusted them with against you''
-Zella
that's deep bro.
That background would make a dope shirt!
Dustin Carter agreed
Lets Find The Creator and Ask If I can use the Idea, If he/she agrees I'll make some shirts XD
@@nolanstewart1570 On the instagram account it looks like they were already made in limited quantity unfortunately
@@nolanstewart1570 See if you can bro I would for sure get one
theoretically you could screenshot the image and have one printed yourself, at risk of being sued, of course
It's really depressing to see how we are all alone when we have the same feelings and can understand each other perfectly. How comes destiny keeping us so far apart from the others to suffer in loneliness when we could stay in the same dark box being friends.
I geuss that's just how it is... 😢
Most of us just hide it and open up on here because it’s anonymous 😁😁😁
I always think the same thing. Maybe we make a discord server
In short we re alone cus we can take fakr shit we re stronger and honest, sometimes weak but we re better
U r right
Don’t be sad
Because sad backwards, is Das
And Das not good
( '-’ )
Lol 😂 true
that is very cute
I think your right 😂
@Dropdead_bop mhm
What's das?
I started crying, because lately I've been feeling like I need a purpose. I have a hard time getting up in the morning because everything feels pointless and I feel useless.
Vohasiiv trust me one day your going to find what you wake up excited to do, what u can’t fall asleep because it makes you excited. Just keep pushing and you’ll make it through.
Everything goes in steps so to be happy there might be alot steps to go
But your soul got a plan for you
So trust your feelings
There might be alot wrong in your life that make you feel bad
So try to live your dream
@@evazumtobel5976 Problem is I don't think I have a dream, or if I do I don't know it.
I feel you
Cus u are
Thanks for all your feedback guys you're all amazing!💖 but I didn't make up that quote by my lonesome it was Hinata from Naruto, She defines that as true strength. Failing is not weakness but giving into failure is what makes one weak.
Why do we fall?
Then remind yourself: Fear can save your life sometimes but if there is one feeling that can hurt you way worse than any other one, it is regret. Don't fight with your conscience, listen to it. Being alive is what matters. Fuck fear, save your future. Even when you do mistakes, remember that nobody cares about it more than you. So take your first step, stop complaining and to whatever it takes to do whatever you want. Remember that as long as you're alive everything is possible.
加油
This is very true. I experienced it myself today.
" being weak is nothing to be ashamed of, staying weak is"
what you fear now will make you strong later.
your baby steps will grow to leaps,
your wails of failure to screams of victory,
your tears to trophies.
you may not now, but you will.
as long as you know this, it will be
remember that it will be and will
will it and it will be
good luck my friend,
tears to trophies
Have you tried bathing in rice? I heard rice fixes everything 😊 Just a joke to make you smile 😅😁
🦟🦗🦟🦗🦟🦗🦟🦗🦟 I'm weird
If this picture was on a T-shirt or pullover hoodie. I’d buy it so fast.
Custom print it lol
Tofu nah gotta support the artist that drew it. He linked them in the description and after following them & visiting their merch, they have the hoodie that the artist made. Should be supporting the artist
@@azrael18 Where? Deathandmilk's merch page isnt up yet? I cant find the hoodie..
im wearing this picture now :3
@@babapurooyunda whered u get it?
This mix hits me hard, for various reasons.
My brother got hit by a car 4 years ago, me and my family were devastaded, he was the brother who I was more closer with. Since then, I became more and more like him, trying to make my mom happy. "You resemble a lot like your brother" she said in multiple ocasions, but after a while, I started to have a identity crisis, where I didn't know if I liked something because my brother liked it or it was me, I started to forget the person I was before, it got to the point that I took the same career as my brother for college, even though I don't like it that much, my mom said to me that "You'll finish his dream", but I don't want to live being seen like my brother, I want to be my own person.
I don't know how to tell my mom that this behaivor of her, comparing me to my brother, is unhealthy, without sounding rude or making her sad.
So yeah, I'm not my past. I'm not my brother.
Have a good day everyone, take care and stay home on these hard days.
(Sorry, english is not my mother language.)
some times to make progress you cant avoid hurting her, the sooner you do it the less painful it will be for both of you
Say nothing to your mum about it , discover who you are . That way you will honour you ,your mum and your brother .Respect for being strong and good luck on your journey of discovery.
You should always follow your dreams and take your own path. Sometimes it will feel like no one understands you or supports you, but you have to get through this, because it's your life nobody else's.. So maybe she will get sad, but she will be happy in the future because she will see you happy. Hopefully I could help you a bit.. And I wish you all the best. If you need someone to talk with, feel free. (I know we don't know each other, but I really wanna help people). Have a great day 😁
You are not alone , which ever path you chose . Your brother would want you happy . Godspeed 🙏🏽❤️🌙🌞
I will never stay home on hard days
There's so many depressing comments here.. I rlly wish everyone the best and stay safe! You all deserve the best in life
thanks
you too :D
I’ve always been a chill guy, never held any grudges or remorse towards anyone. I’m not sociable, I spent my freshmen year alone to an extent. However, it all changed when I met her. When she moved to my biology class, just a few desks away from me. I didn’t pay too much attention at first, I was always so enrolled into my classes that some people could’ve considered me a nerd. It wasn’t until she asked such a simple question, such nice and smooth and overall normal question that locked my sight to her. She asked me “what’s your name” till this day I don’t even know why it took me half a minute to answer, but anyhow. That day, I gave away everything. Mu time was devoted to just appreciate everything about her... she had these amazing hazelnut brown eyes that looked so tender, so colorful. I knew they were normal brown eyes, but... god was I in love. It’s been 4 years now, and we’re still dating up until this day. Whenever I listen to these type of songs I really cherish that speck of a moment that started everything. If you read all of this which I doubt anyone will, thanks for your time. This is something I’ve been wanting to vent ever since I knew she would be mine.
edit: I cant believe it has been 4 years since I made this comment. Yet this feelings are still true to this day. We are still going strong against all adversaries. I yearn to marry this woman soon, though soon does no justice to our love. Let my story be a testament to all that love is powerful and true. Goodluck everybody !
Buddy if that wasn't the sweetest thing then I don't know what is.
Nice, i felt the love.
Nice one man. I ran into a girl at college on Friday and my goodness she's beautiful and extremely cute. I was too shy to speak to her. I really hope I run into her again.
Yuno Gasai don’t get stuck into anything, appearance can be so appealing, so tearful yet so dangerous. Keep your distance, but be close. Stay quiet, but speak your feelings out loud. I hope you understand me, and don’t fall for deceiving actions. A mans true sin is to fall in love, for love is the only thing that could break a man...
I'm sorry but
*Have you heard of fortnite?*
I accidentally shit myself while listening cause that’s how relaxed my entire body got
That's strangely intense..?
Lmao
Gamer down, Fs in chat
@@SushiRicetm F
@@SushiRicetm F
"At war, you have to ask yourself, who should I feel sorry for? The ones who lost? Or the ones who won?"
There are no winners in war
Why do I have to ask myself anything? Soldiers don't ask questions. Why should we? Oh wait, you want to be better than them. My bad.
@@gerloke914 stop talking rubbish you weird guy.
I'd only feel sorry for people like you - people who are looking for someone to feel sorry for... :D
Standing above his first or last enemy, Achilles looked towards the desert Sun. He desired to yell, yet his spirit stayed slow at the river of Styx; how many souls flow from that river, and to where?
Scream at God, they chant.
God.
The Author is the One who wields the Master (s)word(s).
I was young and a fool, bullying one kid, over and over. Hurting him, tipping and pushing him over for years, I don’t understand why he never fought back, he just smiled. Left him around 6th grade met back around high school, knew who I was yet he was still nice to me. I toned down and remembered what I had done. I’ve regretted everything. All of the terrible things i’ve done, to such a pure hearted boy. Treated me with kindness, even after our past, he looks at me like equals. It pisses me off how childish I was to do something like that.
Wholesome Thomas Vue watch Eiga Koe no Katachi aka A Silent Voice(2016)
@@ReyCha96 i loved this, this is about a girl with bad hearing and a guy who bullies her, later learning sign language to communicate right?
Take care of him, I was just like him and I wouldnt stop smiling cause I thought I didn't worth anything. He probably lived things even more difficult than you bullying him and he thinks it's normal to be treat like that.
Sorry for my grammar, im not english.
I had people who bullied me terribly to the point of suicide. The only thing I would ask from them is the learn from you’re mistakes and teach you’re children how to be a good to person. Don’t let it repeat. You’re a good person for recognizing what you did. Don’t let your past hang over your head. We’ve all done messed up stuff. We’re only human and we make a lot of mistakes. It’s okay ❤️
Perhaps he did not take you seriously?
I'm in an unhealthy relationship with my past, I wanna move on but my past just keeps on clinging to me.
It keeps waiting around the corner for me.
same
most of the time you only blame yourself for blaming yourself. it takes time to accept the past. But keep in mind that in those cases where you acted as you did, you were doing the right thing for yourself at the moment. I don't know you or your past, but you have changed and change can be very positive. Only you lay the blame for the mistakes you think you made. The "mistakes" do not describe the person you are now. Maybe u don't think so, but there are No mistakes in this world.
@@sika7023 reading your message gives real positive vibes.
literaly you saying that and me seeing zuko as your profile pic
if you read this, you're here for some reason .
Everything is gonna be okay ❤
Hope so, let's all get through this together!
Honestly....I'm with you guys. Let's go.
Just lost another job, it feels like my whole world is coming apart all around me and im left to just watch it burn, how many more failures will it take to just live
@@joecortesi2894 keep your head up one door closes so you can fly high through another keep your faith that it will work out
@@joecortesi2894 honestly terrible days are unavoidable but what happens next is up to you - just try and stay positive okay ? sometimes all you need to do is stop for a moment.
take a deep breath.
and relax . just let everyting flow past you for a moment
Lofi saved my life...
Definitely feel you on this one man. Lofi got me through alot and will continue to, good for the soul and puts the mind at ease
I just get high...
@@chefbiggestdog LMAO
from what?
@@azi.q Myself, really. Was in a bit of a dark place some years back. I was disillusioned with the world and all, but then I found lofi hip-hop and chillhop. Before I knew it, I was listening to it daily as I wrote stories and poems. Even now, I'm listening to Chilled Cow radio as I write.
Every comment is sad I'm just discovering new music at 3 am
Welcome to the lofi fandom, a bunch of sad people and fuckboys. If u ever see my comments I'll just make fun of them, enjoy
0400 here mate, feels hit.
Damn, same thing. The comments are "we're all here for a reason (...)". Yeah, I'm just here to listen to good music, what's with the waves of depressed people ? Not that I mind, it's nice to see a place where they can share thoughts and help each others, but 99% of the comments are about depression... this is quite depressing 🤔
@@Shyning ikr , like wtf chills bro .. just listen to this masterpiece
Walk it off, you'll be fine.
"They say humans are social animals, they can't live alone. But you can live pretty well by yourself. I tell ya...instead of feeling alone in a group, it's better to have real solitude all by yourself."
- Faye Valentine (Cowboy Bebop)
nah get people that are good for you, the worst part youll have to become good
I was looking for solitude for like years without a concious, always heard in my mixes never looked up. thanks for sharing this, i'm complete.
Ikr
Sometimes i do feel kinda lonely but it works out best for me
No one:
Me: Scrolls through comments instead of working
GET BACK TO WORK YOUR LOOSING ME CUSTOMERS
same here heh
Lol same
I just found your channel and GOD DAM DOES THAT FIRST SONG HIT
First 50 seconds are so good, and I'm only 50 seconds in
@@supportwaifu it gets better, trust me
True, this is coming on my playlist
Subscribe to Kayou! His content is soooo so so so good. One of his playlists "It was only an Autumn Tale" hit me harddddd and I highly recommend it.
That's the first track I heard from this channel as well. Likewise what locked me in
I'm tired of being alone even though my kindness has been being taken for granted. How is it someone can be so highly spoken of yet i can't find happiness?
I'm turning 29 next month and I'm just getting tired of crying nearly every night because i just can't catch a break.
I have so much love and compassion to give but I'm only used from what I've been given at birth....a heart is a fickle thing to to play with yet it's humanity favorite game.
If you're still reading this, you've just gotten a glimpse into someone's soul and i thank you for giving the time to get to know me.
Good night.
Good night
I've been there, believe me you're not alone. My mom says It's best to be alone than to be in bad company. Work on yourself first, become the person you want to date. Oh and don't base your happiness off of one person or finding love, I made that mistake and got hurt. Stay strong
i feel you, i'm living the same since so many years... and i can tell you that you'll fine someone for you. if i could give you one advice, it would be this one : get out of you home, meet new people (at parties or things like that for exemple). sometimes, the person for us is not as far from us as we think ; the hardest part is to find the courage to do the first step and talk to the person you have some crush on, or who just look perfect to you. (i'm mean, you know, this girl/guy at this party you wanted to talk to but you thought there will never be something between you.) next time, just smile, look at her/him, and try you best to establish some contact. and even if you are persuaded to look like a strange person, keep it up that way. maybe the person in front of you is looking for a person like you, who is very sensitive and who have a mountain of love to share. i actually don't know how to help you anymore, then... just act like you feel inside, be you, the real you. i hope this will be able to help you, even a little bit. i'm sorry if my english is not perfect, i'm french then i don't speak it perfecty. have a nice day, and i hope things to become better for you!
I know exactly what you’re feeling, I’m 20 now but I’ve been feeling like this for 3 years or more... But I know that things happen and we just don’t need to have expectations about life’s events. We just need to be patient and keep on living, meeting new people. We just need to be ourselves. Be patient, you’re not alone.
you seem to be a nice person. you are not the only one in this situation. there are people that really don"t have luck in love, because they are good people and not everybody plays fair. They are lots of ways of giving love, like art for exemple. perhaps you can find hapiness without relying on one person? only you can find the aswer.
♥
3 things I want in life are to make my parents proud, give my family a stable life, and give my son a father to look up to. i fucked up a lot when i was younger. was in and out of jail and placements for most of my life. finally really started to get my shit together about 6 years ago, but its hard to deal with knowing how much time i wasted hurting other people. i have a 3 year old son now. i just want to be a role model to him and point him in the right direction. i dont want him to go through what i did but i have to work so much right now sometimes its hard to spend time with him and be there to steer him in the right direction. i dont ever want my son to think his dad wasnt there.
Well... im sure you will find a father. You are a nice person. If you don't think that that take my quiz
Are you a human?
□Yes □No
Do you have feelings?
□Yes □No
Do you want to be happy?
□Yes □No
Do you want others to be happy?
□Yes □No
Are you trying your best?
□Yes □No
Have you been very sad?
□Yes □No
The ones who go through the most, are always the nicest.
You don't want others to be sad like you, so you always put on a smile, even if it means you have to fake it.
as long as he knows you love him to the ends of the earth, it won’t matter how far away you are or for how long. he will know that no matter what he is always and forever completely loved by you.
damnnn she got a katana in her
That's pretty badass not gon lie
I mean, she's not even reacting
cool
that;s what it feels like my man...
Yah something that traumatic numbs u for a short time
First thought that came into my mind when i read this comment:
"Uhm, hey. looks like you've got a katana in your stomach? do you need a hospital or something?"
"Huh? oh no it's fine, that's always just kinda been there, don't worry bout it"
"I mean are you sure? Cause it looks kinda painful..."
"No no, it's alright. Well I'm gonna go play football now, so, see ya"
"o-oh...okay? uhm...bye?"
@@-ZiIver- W3RD
Ngl thats how i feel with music like i feel numb and no matter wat people say or do will ever hurt me as long as i hav my headphones in.
"Your story may not have such a happy beginning, but that does not make you who you are.
It is the rest of your story, who you choose to be..."
-That goat lady from Kungfu Panda 2
Walk it off, you'll be fine.
searching for my purpose,
Most times I feel the wall,
Wondering if its ok to be small
Tears hit the pavement,
Frames capture it all
From the times before I met you
To the days I kept fishing
Waiting on whats sublime
Trying to find what im gifted with
Actualization placed me into maddness
When I realized the real me was powerless
The sheep that follow the wolf
Became my brothers to find the light
So backward, yet only moving forward in time.
I strip the vail of uncetainty
Strip essence of the ego
One more deep breath
One more try to let go
Beautifully wrote!! Can I borrow this for my music?
A person very dear to me has had a rough past he’s warned me about, and it’s true some people tell me that I shouldn’t have anything to do with this person but he tells me that he wishes he never did any of the stuff he did and I tell him his past doesn’t define him and if anyone is struggling with this learn from your past, don’t burden yourself.
@@chefbiggestdog Did you really do this or you fucking around,you in a gang or some shit?
Kris Nor You’re fucked up, fucking asshole.
@@thetab0179 what did he say ?
@@40_abrarmehboob28 how he killed 15 children, injured several more, and crippled a few.
@@thetab0179 what the fuck? did he really say that coz that's messed up
My mom just came home.. it’s 2 am for me (she’s always at birthday party’s or some other party’s or clubs), my dad is screaming to me every day for no reason..
And now I’m listening to this to escape the reality..
Lol ur mom a bartender or something?
@@FGKing-gc3xn yah xD
I'm so sorry , my mom and my father do not agree when my father come back home bc we want him in our house , they always in fight , my mother was always in her room . But now he live the house .
All this to tell you that ur situation is difficult but not unchangeable , I know ur tired of this but you know what there is only one person who can change it it's Jesus , He said '' Come to me all you who are tired and heavy I will give you rest " Matthew 11: 28 Come to him and let him change ur life . ( If u wanna talk or something else , I'm here ☺😊
"Regret is for those who've earned the right to look back on the past, all I have is shame" ~Kurama, Elfen Lied.
"Why is everybody suddenly became a poet?"
- me
@@real2124 me not american
Me a cave man lol
Lol just the same type of us or people who want likes
"ahaha"
-me (2019)
People get inspired
i'm better than i ever was. but somehow, it feels worse than before.
maybe it's because everything feels so mundane and boring now. maybe it's because i'm finally aware that i'm missing something.
i think i'm lonely. i have lots of friends, everywhere i go, no matter where i am. good, trustworthy friends. but i always feel alone anyway.
do you really feel lonely?
Is it maybe some other kind of emotion that you mistake for loneliness?
It MAY be that you feel that it is loneliness because it occurs when you are alone, but actually it could be another emotion that occurs when you are not distracted.
It could be anything, most probably a feeling of emptiness?
Well bro i know that feeling very well since i felt like that for a long time during puperty and early adulthood ( im 20 atm ).
What helped ME was philosophy and meditation.
Kinda made me clear my mind and get the right thoughts.
Altought it took for pretty long i'm not feeling that depressing emptiness inside me anymore.
i do feel lonely. i'm lonely. i want someone likeminded that i can connect with, but i don't have a single friend like that. it's lonely.
Story of my life
ua-cam.com/video/fiAoNGZyNSU/v-deo.html
hi say hi to me
Hi
Hi
the past is ours to play with.
we can use it
I wish I wasn't my past. I started to get more and more confident when I was 17-18 but that crumbled again around 20. Fast forward 3 years and my crushing depression and anxiety are back. Got the MJ/alcohol/nicotine addiction bonus package aswell.
"I don't think people always choose. I think its an innate drive that forces the lull of depression to hang in the air
like extreme humidity on a cloudy day. Whether the act is committed by the individual, its not always their
conscious choice. Realising the futility of life is really sad. Its almost like living already knowing the beginning and
the end. A possible detachment from it; an escape - is gratitude. Everything is held by balance and for every
negative we will learn a positive from it eventually; we will grow. I will always be grateful for the music and the
messages within the music which perhaps now can be contextualised and aid the understanding of many, and
possibly start the journey to realisation for others. I hope you have a nice day :) Keep being inspired X"
- This is something I read a couple years ago and found it really encouraging; I hope it helps.
Your subconscious is screaming at you to listen, your “shadow” is trying to tell you something. Search and study Frederick neitzche. He will show you your potential and what your subconscious wants.
@@arim8845 so you like Jordan Peterson? xD
No one is their past; the very minute you regret what you've done you change. Fuck your past, the only way you become your past is if you dwell on it. I hope you defeat your depression, I know what its like; I was depressed for years but I am better now. I feel so happy all the time like I am going to burst, I am telling you it definitely gets better, you just need to realize the strength you hold; the world is yours, you just need to reach out and touch it, just go from there. I will pray to God in heaven for you, good day. ~♥
LIFE IS ALL ABOUT = jokes N laughs, music\movies, friends, family, a bike, a laptop, bedroom, chocolates, ice-cream, food, coffee\Tea, whiskey, water, LSD, weed and and a fucking lighter. (a cigarette once in a while is alright, just don't promote its use to others). EVERYTHING EXISTS AND OCCUPY SPACE, WHO GIVES A FUCK WHAT THE PURPOSE IS, IF ANYTHING IS TOO IMPORTANT TO HAVE A PURPOSE TO FULFILL, DON'T WORRY. LIFE WILL FIND ITS WAY. JUST LIVE AND DIE PEACEFULLY GUYS ;)
:JINNY
me: *listening to this and jamming out while writing my stories*
y'all: ITS GONNA BE OKAY ILY PLEASE STAY
me: oh ok
For real XD
P
Ok
Ol
AAAAAH ITS BACK!!! YESSSS!!! Thank you so much Yugen!
Yall in the comts are wise.
"God Wannabe" - You're just a wannabe. Learn from the really wise people on the internet.
Thank you God ♥
@@Esbro Hey us humans we're all wannabes, when you seriously look at it.
It feels like you get the sentence: "Sorry I don't like you" from your crush
imagine gettin that from your 2 month girlfriend tht wus just draging the relationship for her own needs when u were there just actually in love
@@ezarell6033 imagine getting the same from your girl of 2 years. Thats my story, but, some have had more years than that. The only way to find the one you love is to pursue yourself first. If not you will wind up appealing to a codependant nature. Shes out there, and shes walking a path just like you. She who is not named, the one who will help support your light, just like you would her. Shes out there, dont stop believing.
@@H411UCIN093NIC I just dont fall in love with anybody ever. Then again I neved had a chance to begin with so thats not really a problem.
I waited until I was 22 for my first gf. Hell I hadnt even gone on a date yet. I was way too insecure.
My crush did tell me that nonverbally, and that really hurts.
"Everything will be ok,
Maybe not today,
Maybe not tomorrow,
But it will be eventually." -Sean William McLaughlin
sanity is one of those things you dont miss it until it leaves you. the ability to be dumbfounded and awestruck by your enviroment is a gift to most. there are few who cant see life as simple but as a complex network of events past, present, and future, who doubt their every move in hopes of changing the outcome for the best but in the end it all ends up the same. overthinking is a curse on the few people that live in this world. they cant live like everyone else and end up going insane.
Haha got you there, no one liked me when I was little so I found a way to feel less lonely at the cost of slowly draining my own sanity till I lost it for large amounts of time before managing to get a good grasp of it.
My first solution was probably one of the biggest mistakes I made, as I made a personality based on other peoples which later led me to use fake ones nearly 24/7 to the point where now I don’t even know who the real me is anymore or why I’m here.
@@kaidan5122 ..........
From bully to being bullied, I'm sorry to everyone I bullied... Don't forgive me but I'm sorry.
It seems like krama has gotten you in the back.. Don't dwell on it too long it'll will hurt more, just move forward and never forget your old actions while making new ones ok?
Having love and respect for people now is the only redemption for past actions that can't be changed. Karma is a bitch, you get what you put out in the world.
Repent and trust in Jesus
@Pointless Channel I'm not saying sorry to fix the past, it's for them to forgive what I've done to them or at least they'll know I am sorry. If you are wondering. Yes I did apologize in front of everyone I I bullied.
@@grantkauahijr.1647 Yes.
"I was my past. I am my present. I will be my future. Everything that was and has yet to be is what makes us our own self now. Neither aspect makes a person without the other."
-Some tired dude listening to this
Indeed
Lol u weak af
Well said
14 year old girls : T-T
*Pulls out chair* , Have a seat, lets talk about that anime profile picture.
Well everyone, it's been fun but I think it's time for me to go.
I'd like to say this before I go though, you matter and I love you. I don't know you, I don't need to in order to know I love you. If you need me, I'm always here for you. I'll always be in your corner rooting for you, I promise.
Until we meet again :)
Thank you. Truly
@@zmbiezdiac27-65 No need to thank me, I'm just here to help to the best of my ability :)
@@blasphemous140 as am I. Just trying to get through while saving a couple people along the way
Japan.... I've wanted to go for so long.. Even though I'm only 12 :/.
I just love the perfect balance and chaos in Japan... The overwhelming amount of aesthethic.. The feeling of walking through the street of Tokyo at night. It hits me so hard whenever I think about that there are 3 years until i finish my school (In Denmark) and I've wanted to go for an exchange year to Japan as soon as i get out of school. I'm currently also learning japanese.. Now that I'm in quarantine I study my japanese almost every day.... Idk why I wrote this, thank you if you read this :/
better dedication than i ever had
keep working hard it will pay
Good luck dude!!
You are doing it right. Follow your dreams, and remember do not dream about having stuff, dream about following your passion, picture yourself doing what you love... and the rest will follow.
Edit: I love Japanese culture, and also started learning Japanese during the pandemic, Hajimemashite... but 30 years latter than you. You are going to do great. Good Luck.
You got this!
It's been Year's now fighting this thought of Suicide and when it came time I couldn't do it. I feel as if I'm just stuck in a cycle of despair, I know it's just part of life but How much pain will it be? how many tears will We have to cry out? And even when I try to speak the Truth it always erases itself, therefore, defined as a lie, I always question if the life I'm living right now is the vision I'm not supposed to see, all I can say is, To all of you live your life in peace they may not believe you changed but don't tell them with words, show them with Actions. History doesn't talk about quitters so like me Don't quit.
I'm not sure if I misinterpreted your comment or not so I thought I might as well leave this here either way, in case anyone needs it. (sorry if its stupid or cheesy). For what it's worth, I hope that one day all of you out there will begin to see the small happy things again. A colorful sunny day in the middle of all the colorless dull ones.. I can't say that I understand what all of you are going through, but I hope your days become a little bit lighter, if not brighter. And that you'll hear that one song on the radio that makes you feel even a bit happy. A joke that makes you chuckle even though its stupid, a yellow flower, or even how the rain feels on your skin. Please keep on living. I believe in you.
"I am not my past. I am not the bully I once was thinking nothing of it when I did what I did until I realized as I got older it was not right. There is no justifying what I did because every reason or point I think of sounds like an excuse. I accept the actions I have done and did past to now, I know the bad ones are things I cannot take back and are also something I cannot allow to become more baggage on my heavy and tired body. I can't. I won't. I understand after being bullied years later what it felt like and I would never wish that upon anyone. I am not my past.
"I have grown up in one of the most subtle and hard to see ways of being abused as a child to even now as I am an adult. Part of me remembers how those moments I blame myself for 'acting out' were not right. I didn't know it was okay to stand up for yourself when I tried and succeeded in a moment I didn't know I needed to be heard and know my ground was there. I may never get through to him, but he does not hold that power over me anymore. My voice is stronger. I am stronger. I am not going to be quiet anymore. I am not my past.
"Strength. It's a word of many meanings. Built strong. Armor casing us in to protect us rom outside enemies or things that could hurt us. Standing back up when you fall once or many times. I was not a strong person in my past. I was brittle like egg shells, similar to the ones I had to walk across every waking moment around him. As years have gone by, there were those better moments I felt what being strong really was. But, also the ones that tore me apart limb from limb. Today I have a clearer perspective on what it means for me and others. I know for the average person you see walking down the sidewalk past you, it means differently to them and that's the definition for them. Its different. For me, it is making sure I keep moving forward with my head up high, eyes forward, and not looking back. I can hold back tears if I have to, but letting out all those emotions truthfully isolated or with trusted friends is also being strong. You show strength in trusting them helping. I am stronger now than ever, and pretty soon I'm going to hit my limit, but that's okay. I am not my past.
"I am not the scared little girl anymore. I am not my past. I will not allow others to belittle my actions, words, or every single trait and part of my being. I am not my past. I am going to reach out for help when things get scary and I cannot handle it on my own. I am not my past, the one who was afraid to or didn't know it was okay to do.
"I. am. not. my. past."
But you are ugly...right?
broke me down .... thank you. real talk.
Holy moly, I have no words. This is one of the best mixes I've heard in a long, long time. This is amazing, from the art selection to the music selection. 10/10
I find myself back here again, I think to myself "there is no "better" version of myself". The people who mattered to me are gone, but then again I was the most horrible person to be called a friend, even with promise of getting better for the sake of those I hurt it wasn't enough, it didnt matter, whatever damage had been done was done, i questioned myself it I truly am better, no matter who walks into my life now, they will think i always been this version of me they call a good person, i can be called whatever anyone wants but I'll never be told I'm a "better" person, because they are gone, and if I have became a better person, why couldn't this "better" version of me save the friendships he once had, or was the old me so horrible that this "better" version of couldn't do anything to save it.
I'm sorry but… just wanted to tell someone, but well actually tell no one.
Just writing this in hopes that maybe you will see it, just by a miracle. I'm sorry I cut ties with you at such a bad time, when you were probably suicidal, your best friend died and you couldn't even make it to his funeral, since you were abroad, and you probably felt really depressed and as of now I'm not even sure if you're alive, but I just couldn't, I liked you a lot, you knew that, but I just couldn't stop thinking about you, whatever I was doing, I found myself thinking about you in one way or another, and it got really depressing after more than a year… I was just trying to get my life back together since it was a mess and I almost did the same thing our friend did… I'm so sorry. But if you saw this by some miracle, I would love to hear from you and or see you, at least one last time, just wanna know you're still okay...
Life is painful as it is,
but all we need to do is to get used to it,
although it will break your heart,
and make you cry and the tears that flow from your eyes is burning your skin,
You think about yourself, parents, family, friends and love one,
You tried to calm down,
but after a while you are started to loses your mind,
You are going insane,
You grab a knife and put it onto chest,
but you couldn't do so,
as if the something is stopping you for doing so,
because you are still something,
you are special,
and then you heard a voice whisphering into your ears,
"You shouldn't gave up yet, You can do something that no one know you can,
You must stay alive, if not they will cry, they will feel sad"
You began imagine someone on your head,
and you started to cry.
The knife you hold fell from your hand,
You began to loses your mind out by the madness,
tears never stop flowing from your eyes,
Couple of months has passed and you started to change,
You decided to do something that is worthwhile
you decided to think positively,
You decided to be calm and relaxed,
You keep moving foward,
Keep the past as memories,
You began to plan for your futures,
Then you stand up and swear that you will change to be better,
You began watch the billion stars on the nightskies,
And you decided too change, To a better person,
You began to think positively,
You learn from your mistakes,
You start to learn many things each day,
You faced your own fear,
You comfort yourself,
Then you start to be more friendly to other people,
Slowly each day,
Smiles is starting to pictured in your face,
Tears that were always flowing from your eyes,
No longer burn your skins,
You are no longer sad, depressed,stressed.
YOU CHANGED,
With all of those painful life,
You use them, To help other people,
You used the experience,
To comfort other people,
The people that you helped,
Feel grateful to you,
You started to make people smile,
You are finally free,
from the darkness that is consuming your heart,
You are free, No more tears,
You are now a beautiful blossom flowers,
But no need to stop here, You can do more than this,
You can achieve something more,
Thank you...
"HamanoKaito"
[to be continued] I'm just casually waiting on you to write more. haha
@@TheKidZombieSlayer thank you for replying I almost forgot about this
this is deep but touching....
i love it!
@@fanglewolf4257 yes I know and thank you, I upgraded it a little bit and will add it as a new comment
:')
I'd rather run toward my own self-destruction then walk away from those who I love.
-Shane Bruce 2019
i have trouble with that one but i'm learning.
Just be strong enough to survive, for yourself and for others.
Then or than? 'cause I mean...
Lol I kinda feel like I’m doing both at the same time
@@moggers7903 LOL I think I know exactly what you mean bud 💯
"wouldn't it be better if you let it go?"
If you think it will help you yes any more info text me in Instagram blood_lay_low
But what if I don’t want to? .... 🙁
What if its everything you have? What if its the only thing you sacrificed all your friends and emotions and time for?
What if it's the entire world! How can I just let it go? What I know is different than what I can. It's paining yet satisfying in a weird manner.
@@abdulrahmanshouli4200 i have no plans for the future no dreams anymore. Does it get boring, yes. Am i still sad, yes. Not worth it
Ok i just hate that everything is in dollar and I live in a shit country that 5x R$1 = 1 dolar
So just cant buy merch
Nothing wrong here, I'm the MF just tryna do some homework...
ha! i feel you, should be studying rn
"Sometimes your life is sad, But don't suicide you have alot to live for"
-PeopleWhoHaveSuicidalThoughts
)
All I have to say is TY for saving me 4 years ago. It felt like a struggle to get to this point and I'm happy so TY so much.
Even if I helped a single person get through a tough moment, it would have been all worth it
"If you feel like crashing, accelerate more you idiot"
-min yoongi
why the utter pain unknown? idiot
link wallpapaer?
its been 3 years since i discovered this playlist every now and then when i feel sad i come back to it, thank you for the choice of these songs rly helped me wit em :)
Thank you for sticking around!
same
Loving you is taking all the love I could never give myself and putting it to good use.
memory is not
and how can it be
what i call
me
Drew ...best comment I have read on any comment stream! May I have your permission to quote you?
@@delvingmind yea sure 😁 I put all my poetry on hello poetry as well, my pseudonym is D Letwixt
the best Thing is ,when ppl do lofis
it can't Sound actually bad
so i do enjoy every lofi ,but this seems legit good
Sometimes I just wanna be like an anime protagonist with this only one preson who love me...
I just wanna be loved :c
I love you ❤
Same
I really can’t help reminiscing about my past when listening to this.
did not look at my likes..n I met this girl about 3 years ago whilst I was on my gap year. My friends and I just arrived in Sydney, Australia and as we were just about to go to our hotel, I met this white haired waiter with ocean eyes in a cafe. I remember how we caught eyes for an instance and everything around us just stood still. We got each others details and nearly every night I would wait outside that cafe until 11:00 pm just to see her and walk her home.
I didn’t want her to know I was only there for a couple of weeks so I lied and said my family just moved here. We finally got a whole day together no thanks to the busy schedule she had. We went to a local theme park and the last thing she wanted to go on was the Ferris wheel. I don’t know if she planned it or not but as we got to the top, we could see the sunset simmering down on everything. She turned to me and held my hand, she looked down and said “I really like you, like really really like you”. I knew what she was trying to say so I took a leap and said “I love you too”. She buried her head on my chest and held me tightly as the Ferris wheel took its course...
We hung out every chance we got and she even introduced me to her family. I think I broke her heart when I told her I’ll be leaving in a couple of days. She gave me a cold shoulder every time I saw her from then. I told myself that I wouldn’t be surprised if she didn’t give me a proper send off, not as boyfriend and girlfriend, but as true lovers so I was shocked to see her waiting for me in the airport. We caught eyes just like the time we first met. She said her farewells and made me promise her that I would come back.
It’s been about 3 years now and I’m starting to feel self conscious. I keep on thinking that I have left it too late and she’s moved on but for some reason, I know she’s still waiting. I’ve just graduated from my university in Toronto and I’m planning on surprising her next month.
Wish me luck...
Update 1: Thank you for all the support. Its confirmed I’m heading back to Sydney in 6 days instead of a month! All of you have motivated me and now I’m much closer to her than I was 4 days ago when I first shared my story, next update will probably be when I’m with her, hopefully. I’ve just brought tickets and I’m heading to LAX on Tuesday next week. If I haven’t updated you all in at least 8 days then I guess it’s safe to say that my experience of feeling lonely, feeling forgotten and feeling ashamed was a lesson to never let your soulmate go, even if you have to go through hell and back. Well, goodbye for now...
Update 3: Hello everyone, this will be a short update. Don’t be worried though, yes I’m in Sydney, and no I haven’t been able to meet her yet, this was expected anyway. I went back to the cafe I met her in seeing if she was still working there. Turns out, she quit her job a couple of months after I parted with her 3-4 years ago. Her boss said she just wasn’t the same after I left, she would always turn up late to her shifts and would be rude to customers, I know I’m the cause of that.
I went back to her parents house if she was there, when they opened the door they recognised me straight away. Her mother started crying whilst her dad gave me the death stare. He said my full name and gave me a hug. He said after I left, she became more motivated to follow her own dreams so she moved away with only the money she saved up from her work from the cafe. They said she told them she was going Melbourne. I had dinner at their house and we talked about everything that happened to her after I moved away, how she cut her long luscious hair, how she even dyed her hair but dyed it back because she didn’t like it brown, how she completely changed her clothes and how she started smoking for a couple of months but quit because everyone was worried about her. I know I was the cause of everything bad that happened to her.
Her parents offered me to stay the night but I told them that I couldn’t burden them anymore, I also apologised to them for leaving their daughter so hastily and giving her false hope. They gave me a hug and told me that she was still waiting for me before waving me goodbye, I hope she is.
Well, I’m in a hotel right now and I’m about to leave to go to Melbourne, I missed Sydney, I forgot how beautiful this place was. I keep telling myself that she’s still waiting to ease my mind. Next update will be in a couple of hours. I haven’t lost hope yet. See yall later.
Update 4: it’s 3:30am in Melbourne, I’m in bed and right next to me, I can feel her breath bouncing off my skin. I’m holding back the tears and I’m struggling to text through my phone. She hasn’t changed at all... Just to think that around 12 hours a ago, I was doubting myself so much that a part of me wanted to head back home and now, the love of my life is in the same bed as me, we’re so close to touching each others hands, like in 2014.
Honestly, I forgot how we met again. I just remember running into the ladies toilets in a car park convincing the girl to get out of the cubicle so she can face me again. I remember crying and smiling at the same time, I remember her punching my chest, calling me selfish whilst tears and her makeup was staining my shirt. I think I’ve never said the word sorry so many times in a minute. But now, all these things don’t matter.
Lani is safe, she’s doing well and she’s with me. That’s all. All my efforts feel redeemed, all my doubts turned to happiness, all my worries has turned to just mere thoughts in my mind. I feel balanced. I feel thrilled, I feel like I can finally be at peace with myself.
I’ll tell you all how I’m in this situation already in the morning. I’m tired and I just want to enjoy sleep again. Have a good one.
Update 5: I guess it really is true that patience is a virtue. Having patience means having some sort of discipline, where you can command yourself to sit there and let time go past; wether it’s a couple of minutes, couple of hours, days, weeks months and even years, having patience will always end in something good. Even if you aren’t the type of person, you’ve read this much and hopefully my experiences have convinced you that something is truly out there, bigger than you or something much more meaningful.
Anyways, Lani lives in a 3 bedroom apartment with 2 other people, she didn’t want me to sleep on the couch because one of her friends had sex on it with her boyfriend so I guess I didn’t have much of a choice sharing a bed a with her. It’s no big deal, after our first meet in more than 3 years, it felt like I was still on my gap year, we went to a restaurant to talk about some things. She hasn’t matured, but acts like it. Her sense of humour is still the same, her laugh has always been ugly, sounds uglier if she tries to hide it actually. But she’s developed a real sense of professionalism, which I find so attractive. She’s a primary school teacher and she’s so passionate about it. She also told me her feelings about me have been mixed but she’s starting to slowly revert back to 2014, I don’t know if that’s good or bad but I told her don’t reflect on the past, focus on the future but I’m not leaving you the same way I did 3-4 years ago, she kissed me on the cheek. She said she can see the guilt in my eyes and told me not to worry about it anymore. After that, we went back to her apartment and that was update 4. Nothing really happened yesterday, she said she’ll leave me alone for a while to let me catch up on sleep and work but I don’t want her to. My jet lag is as bad as the state of her room, but I don’t mind. Sorry this update is short. She said she wants me to go to the cinemas with her later, our first date as adults. Peace. (Had to cut update 2 out, it wasn’t important, it was just me rambling on about my troubles).
If you pull your cheek you cant smile
Just kidding, I just wanted to make you smile
awww that was cute
i like memes i didnt
I forgot how to smile
@@jayvxm just remember how's all.
"Man fears the darkness, and so he scrapes away at the edges of it with fire. He creates life by diminishing the Darkness." ~Ayanami Rei
5:30 makes my soul cry
When the ppl from the comment section understand you better than your own friends
The title just fucking hit me, the past was so different. Its kinda late rn and I haven't slept early for days, I'm using a spare phone and the past is so much different. I was a damaged person and I got better, so much better
Until I got into these two relationships, I got cheated on and dumped.
Back then, my parents almost divorced and love just seemed impossible. I pushed people away and I did so much damage I can't forgive myself ever for, I'm now running away from so much guilt, depression and sadness. And once I got out of it It came back, and summer is over. School is starting over, new classmates and everything
But yet after 2 more useless months, I'd have to leave the school
After taking so much time to make friends and have a moment of calmness in my life. The neverending run comes for me, doesn't it? Now I just need to find a purpose to be here, even though it seems impossible
Thanks for reading, if you made it this far
Maybe turn to arts; create something that you would want to see through, something to hold your waking thoughts, something that makes you happy.
Everything you need in life is on its way to you.
@Raid Let's hope not. :X
.. there is close relation between me from now and the person I was in past .. treating this pearson like a friend one day would be amazing .. Wish that you all have found those friends 🤞
Much love ❤
don't let your past kill your future ...
Damn, it seems like the emo community has moved to lofi hip hop... :D
I remember religiously listening to this playlist throughout my highschool years, all the way back in the pandemic. This kind of music helped me pull through the late nights filled with homework and depression, and it's currently helping me pull through studying for my last year of university.
Will always keep this one close to my heart. 💜
Lately I have been in love with a girl since I saw her, her attention was very important to me, her hair, her beautiful eyes, her skin, her essence. I decided to meet her, if it was easy for me to become her friend but I wanted to be more than that as I am not good at love, I failed.
In these moments of pandemic we have been more connected and she became fond of me, she even says that I am very special to her, that she loves me and that she loves me, but I was already rejected several times by her and I knew that she does not want a relationship with anyone.
but she always keeps me close to her and just by her presence or a message I feel good.
But at this moment I have passed an emotional crisis and I no longer feel so safe around her. every time he tells me I love you or I love you. I feel a bit empty I don't know what the answer would be.
I just come to listen to lofi and express my thoughts
"When you talk to me, you give me the impression that I won't scratch the surface."
Interesting how just a simple lyric and rhythm can find a way through the cracks.
Every Lofi what i listen, make me remember the love of my life! Bianca Venturi
We met at the wrong time in our lives. =/
Gui Marini maybe you can get her back one day..
You can easily return to the past but no one is there anymore
Dang, whered everyone go
OSMANTHUS WINE TASTES THE SAME AS I REMEMBER, BUT WHERE ARE THOSE WHO SHARE THE MEMORY?
such a relaxing playlist but not sure if it actually makes me feel calm, or makes my depression 10 times worse.
i can't stop crying
harm doesn't actually hurt anymore; we're used to it by now.
A vocês, minhas sinceras desculpas, pois escreverei isso em minha própria língua, afinal, a dor não pertence ao mundo das palavras. Eu estou, ou estava aqui, nessa noite,pensando em quantos estão tristes o suficiente para escutar esse som, mas eu gostaria que você soubesse, que apesar de tudo, não é o que o mundo faz com você o que importa, mas sim a forma como você lida com tudo. A loucura desse mundo parece sem fim, e a tristeza é como pesadas correntes que te impedem de seguir em frente, mas todos carregamos em nós a chave para a liberdade.Permita-se ser livre, e viva.
lindo texto cara
lek se sabe qual é o anime da foto??
"I can't go back to yesterday, I was a different person then" - James Joyce
8:55
„Called me the devil, I asked you to dance.”
Here's a couple neat quotes:
"we drank the milk but kept the bottle, so ask away young Aristotle"
"99 cent dreams"
"Sometimes, I like being sad"