This is god awfull. The story suffers from grammatical errors, awkward phrasing, and inconsistent tense usage. Some parts are overly descriptive, slowing down the pace. For instance, its only 9minutes in and Kermits interaction after giving critical info for the story, goes from a conversation to how the company would file for a court without any explaniation. And from there it get worse and worse. There is no explanation fo WHY the women did what they did or much about them at all. Its as if, oh I will just throw in a couple of wives and leave it at that. And then there is the legal processes and legal options that are completely unrealistic. If your going to write an hour long story, run it though a graamar check at least. But then, we get a fricking duel in france to add to the length.
Why didn’t he have her charged with kidnapping the children if he had old done that she would have.
Taken off of Literotica. The story is Papatoad’s “Sea Cruise.”
This is god awfull. The story suffers from grammatical errors, awkward phrasing, and inconsistent tense usage. Some parts are overly descriptive, slowing down the pace. For instance, its only 9minutes in and Kermits interaction after giving critical info for the story, goes from a conversation to how the company would file for a court without any explaniation. And from there it get worse and worse. There is no explanation fo WHY the women did what they did or much about them at all. Its as if, oh I will just throw in a couple of wives and leave it at that. And then there is the legal processes and legal options that are completely unrealistic. If your going to write an hour long story, run it though a graamar check at least.
But then, we get a fricking duel in france to add to the length.
2nd story what a load of crap