How to get a toddler to listen without raising your voice

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  • Опубліковано 16 тра 2017
  • Parenting expert, Nanny Robina shows us how you can get your toddler's attention when asking them to put away their toys and getting them dressed.
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КОМЕНТАРІ • 220

  • @katrinikadixon6319
    @katrinikadixon6319 6 років тому +95

    This is not realistic. These kids are already well behaved. I want to see her with two or three kids that come in yelling

  • @omggiiirl2077
    @omggiiirl2077 6 років тому +335

    Death stare. Learn it. Master it. It works, trust me.

    • @karchata7123
      @karchata7123 6 років тому +11

      yes a childs nightmares lmao it works~!

    • @gigic9715
      @gigic9715 6 років тому +7

      Preach!

    • @nyokazafar3350
      @nyokazafar3350 6 років тому +1

      charlene hughes-peseta I AGREE!!!!!!!

    • @pearlishsha3526
      @pearlishsha3526 6 років тому +6

      charlene hughes-peseta ohhh yeah i agree, everytime i do it my child also stare at me ,

    • @aaartist3989
      @aaartist3989 6 років тому +3

      Pearl Ishsha 😂😂😂😂

  • @jessikapiche6097
    @jessikapiche6097 6 років тому +29

    i raised 2 boys and i can tell, as other parents can tell, that a same way doesn't work with different child. Some are shy and respectfull early on,, while others are just 'out there' and don't listen to anything, no connection, no amount of love will do a difference. There is not a single answer that fit all.

    • @jessikapiche6097
      @jessikapiche6097 6 років тому +1

      it's funny that you can hear her say 'HEY!' so loudly and the commanding voice she used... She is not ASKING the kid, she is TELLING the kid she expect to see him do, even if she continue saying 'don't expect the kid to follow through, you need to help (and basically do it yourself). So in the end, the kid will stop listening to the Hey command knowing very well you will do it instead... So i am sorry if i call this BS.
      i applied a simple principle ;
      1- i will not repeat myself
      2- bad behavior (and not listening to the first warning) bring isolation.
      3- Always do what you said you were going to do. (put you into your room, no tv, no distraction, BED!)
      this principle stop me from insanity with 2 boys that were at their peak 'performance' at 5 and 8. They were driving us crazy and didn't know what to do with them anymore. 'psy's didn't help at all. Always make it worst.
      After i apply these principles, the bad behaviour 'the constant fighting' 'playing with food' 'throwing stuff' stop in 2 days. 2 days! thats all it took before we would be able to go to restaurant, friends, shopping again!!!

    • @keylimetea
      @keylimetea 2 роки тому +1

      Exactly. You could tell any daycare or elementary school teacher this and they’d not be shocked at all. Ofc you can still have different approaches while still using positive reinforcement and redirection from negative behaviors and not have to tell you just have to find what works best for each kid. Slightly alter your approach or method. Some kids need to follow, some like to help, some need to be threatened or given a reward, some need to be told no, and then be redirected to another toy or activity or even be given an incentive or motivation. But yelling shouldn’t be required unless they continue to not listen despite trying every positive or gentle approach.

  • @FitBodyByU
    @FitBodyByU 6 років тому +37

    I it works because it’s not their parents and in a different environment

  • @thereseward7852
    @thereseward7852 6 років тому +25

    I begin giving choices at 18 months. Do you want to sit on my lap or play on the rug?
    As they get older - more choices given. My parents were in charge and disliked my giving choices until they saw the results. By 2 1/2 years old - choice given was - you can climb on the chess table or you can stay down. If you climb on the chess table - I will put you down.
    My parents thought it was magic as they saw my children make positive choices. As adults they are the masters of their lives.

    • @hinahinananoha7783
      @hinahinananoha7783 6 років тому +6

      Therese Ward Older generation so often assumes their way works. No matter how many counseling patients it created:)

    • @keylimetea
      @keylimetea 2 роки тому +1

      Choices even can be as simple as “do you want to go play with the cars? No? Okay what do you want to play with?” Even that’s a simple type of a choice for an 18 month old but it’s a big deal. And we give choices to 2 and 2 ½ year olds in my classroom as well. They understand so much more than many people think. They tend to not realize how smart and how aware children are. The choices are things like “do you want to play with the kitchen toys or would you like to go play with the cars over there?” Or “do you want to read this book or this book?” “Do you want to try the potty again later?” Everything can be a choice or seem like a choice to them and then they feel much happier knowing they have full control or seemingly so over their actions.

  • @katiesmith1062
    @katiesmith1062 6 років тому +185

    But it’s proven that children are worse when with their mothers. My son will listen to my grandmother but not me and I talk to him the same exact way she does? It makes no sense.

    • @nellgodwin8658
      @nellgodwin8658 6 років тому +38

      They are more likely most comfortable with the mother so they think they can get away with more.

    • @karlee9821
      @karlee9821 6 років тому +20

      I remember as a small child that I would listen to people I was more unsure about. Or strangers (like neighbors or something) they scared me because I didn’t know them well, and I would listen because I was more scared of what could happen if I didn’t listen.
      I think I was more scared of people than normal kids, but I think there is something to say about kids listening to people they are unsure about.

    • @katiesmith1062
      @katiesmith1062 6 років тому +22

      Eduno Eduno wow you’re sooo cool. Does that comment make you feel better?

    • @vivakelley7662
      @vivakelley7662 6 років тому +2

      Katie Smith yes that it is my 2 sons they will listen to other people but they will not listen to me as their mother

    • @doda-os3bp
      @doda-os3bp 6 років тому +5

      i think thats not only with children, me an 18 year old, my mom could literally scream at me and fight and scold about me not doing anything and i wouldnt really care, my dad would say one word about me not doing dishes and id start bawling, all because when i was growing up my mom was always the one who gave instructions and basically raised me, my dad was always there, just that he didnt really put much effort in all that. So now i do what he says but not what my mom sayd idk how to explain it, im not afraid of him or anything its just the way it is

  • @joanwalford1959
    @joanwalford1959 2 роки тому

    This info is so timeless. This was hosted since 2017 but still relevant to viewers in 2022.

  • @pistolkrystle
    @pistolkrystle 6 років тому +21

    Maybe I should just invest in holy water.

  • @christopherc4829
    @christopherc4829 4 роки тому +1

    Some interesting points. Yet the description was to get a toddler to listen 'without raising your voice'. I didn't hear a calm voice from the Nanny unfortunately.

  • @user-hs5ps9vv8l
    @user-hs5ps9vv8l 6 років тому +7

    I let my son from a few months have a choice and let him pick out things he likes. Since 6 months has been so helpful when it comes to putting on his clothes especially his arms in his shirts and socks. I always communicate his left side from his right side. He is so smart and is always blowing me away day by day

  • @BratBustersParenting
    @BratBustersParenting 7 років тому +35

    Make everything fun, even using an excited voice helps.

  • @omggiiirl2077
    @omggiiirl2077 4 роки тому +5

    I need to see her deal with some bay bays kids! The kind that cuss, fight, with spit, and act up!! I need to see that!!

  • @gigic9715
    @gigic9715 6 років тому +78

    The children portrayed here do not seem like misbehaved children. Too easy when the kid listens. Next time, get some children that actually shows their terrible 2s and 3s.

    • @RaVeNL0v3zU
      @RaVeNL0v3zU 6 років тому +7

      Gigi C like my demons, I mean kids

    • @kitthecat6543
      @kitthecat6543 6 років тому

      Gigi C amen!

    • @kitthecat6543
      @kitthecat6543 6 років тому

      Raven Bailey 😂😂😂 hilarious!!!

    • @hinahinananoha7783
      @hinahinananoha7783 6 років тому

      Gigi C Newsflash: 2s are not "terrible". Misbehaving and tantrums are beneficial.

    • @gigic9715
      @gigic9715 6 років тому +2

      Nadiya Nanoha says who???

  • @notavegan4722
    @notavegan4722 6 років тому +6

    Kids are what you make them!

  • @misslovely9586
    @misslovely9586 2 роки тому +1

    I searched for these videos to know if I’m doing okay in my parenting because you know it’s hard being a parent.. it’s an amazing journey but can hard at times and after watching this I know I’m doing good so far 👏🏻 phew

  • @karchata7123
    @karchata7123 6 років тому +100

    clothing a two hour task if you dont raise your voice? yes i would love to get up at 3:30am to whisper to my kid excitedly about getting dressed!

    • @gigic9715
      @gigic9715 6 років тому +8

      Panhandle Paranormal LMAO too funny. Yeah right, not happening

    • @koitsme
      @koitsme 6 років тому +2

      😂😂😂😂😂

    • @matemahe
      @matemahe 6 років тому +7

      Panhandle Paranormal I think it's a you problem. If from the start you keep your composure when soothing a baby. Baby will emulate you. I have seen my cousins raise their bratty kids with yelling and that's how the kids are too. My sister corrects my niece with kindness and at 1yr she is manipulative....
      1yr Outside please...
      Me No
      1yr outside please
      Me No it's cold
      1yr It's cold. Sweater?
      Me Why
      1yr Outside cold
      Me we will go outside later
      1yr Hug?
      I hug her
      1yr Outside please.
      Have never seen her throw a tantrum or cry other then when she wakes up alone and calls for mama and calms down when we respond to her.

    • @karchata7123
      @karchata7123 6 років тому +12

      lmfao thanks for the tip from a non-parent but you can shove it up your ass until you have a kid that will do anything to defy you by nature no matter what tone you give them. Some of us have jobs we cant be late for and my kindness technique has only taught my kid to defy teachers adults and authority. Sure my kid was sweet as a 1yr old but honey, they grow up and other kids teach them to be ugly anyway.

    • @beautysolutions87
      @beautysolutions87 6 років тому

      Panhandle Paranormal 🤣🤣🤣🤣

  • @MorganMingo70
    @MorganMingo70 6 років тому +36

    Great advice... but I was focused on the host's blouse! SUPER CUTE!! and the double straps makes the thin straps more flattering, IMO!

    • @PM-tc6sl
      @PM-tc6sl 6 років тому

      monica villanueva "in my opinion"

    • @LoveLaRieXO
      @LoveLaRieXO 6 років тому

      The first thing I noticed was her shirt🤣🤣🤣so cute

  • @ajohonly3721
    @ajohonly3721 6 років тому +12

    I will not be going back and forth with them.

  • @roannavoytko2276
    @roannavoytko2276 3 роки тому +1

    I’m happy for anyone that has raised children in a first World Country, with foundation, stability, and all human needs being met.
    It’s difficult to raise kids even for the privileged. So please give slack to those that have had to raise kids without the abundance of blessings that you have.

  • @Eyerusalem_
    @Eyerusalem_ 5 років тому +1

    The 4 year is so cute and a great boy he got up so quick when asked and he goes “Snack” these ladies are chatters wish they allowed the mom to talk.

  • @thebehaviouristguy
    @thebehaviouristguy 6 років тому

    Simple, but effective strategies. Thanks for sharing with the community.

  • @maryfesta7542
    @maryfesta7542 6 років тому +27

    but what if they are already screaming???

    • @erunstoppable1174
      @erunstoppable1174 6 років тому +4

      Mary Festa how old?
      I am a preschool teacher and normally if they start screaming or throw themselves on the floor I told him that’s not how you get what you want and they can come and sit in a chair when they are ready

    • @erunstoppable1174
      @erunstoppable1174 6 років тому +3

      The ages I teach are 17mo-26mo but I use it around 22mo or older. Just depending they on whether they have the comprehension to understand.

    • @Rosedaleb1
      @Rosedaleb1 6 років тому +2

      Care for their need first

  • @vrangel6634
    @vrangel6634 6 років тому +57

    She keeps going like "hey!" when he doesnt listen though. Thats kinda raising your tone. Good tips though

    • @tafadzwamhora
      @tafadzwamhora 6 років тому

      Veronica Rangel thinking 🤔 exactly the same 😂😂

    • @starlitsky8563
      @starlitsky8563 6 років тому +2

      Why does she even say "hey" when talking to such a young child. And her tone is definitely loud

    • @matsinhlapo8041
      @matsinhlapo8041 6 років тому

      Veronica Rangel

  • @lilyraimey3499
    @lilyraimey3499 6 років тому +63

    1:44 There's your first mistake. Didn't even praise him for doing what you wanted - something even dog owners know to do).

    • @queenandreen3205
      @queenandreen3205 6 років тому +36

      No, children need to understand that they should do things because the need to be done, not for praise

    • @theonlylaurawise8623
      @theonlylaurawise8623 6 років тому +5

      Andreen McLean that’s right

    • @sharondalewis1620
      @sharondalewis1620 6 років тому +3

      Lily Raimey she gave him a big smile, I think he can see she's pleased with him

    • @kinndah2519
      @kinndah2519 6 років тому +15

      Andreen McLean OBVIOUSLY a toddler doesnt understand that concept yet. And since you want that to be the case...then your child never has to thank you for doing your responsibility as a parent. You brought him to this world by choice. Don't expect praise for taking care of your own choices.

    • @starbucksgirl6715
      @starbucksgirl6715 6 років тому +14

      Andreen McLean its also never to early to show appreciation. You don't have to throw a party but a smile and a thank you goes a long way. Children aren't robots. You can't teach empathy and appreciation if you refuse to model it.

  • @ashleyb.2941
    @ashleyb.2941 6 років тому +18

    maybe this will work with my 16 year old sister

    • @omggiiirl2077
      @omggiiirl2077 6 років тому

      Ashley B. At that age assault.

    • @ashleyb.2941
      @ashleyb.2941 6 років тому

      charlene hughes-peseta I was only referring to the title “how to get a toddler to listen without raising your voice” ........

    • @ashleyb.2941
      @ashleyb.2941 6 років тому +3

      charlene hughes-peseta because asking someone to come to the table for dinner, take away tablet, put away toys, give choices....definitely abuse.

    • @omggiiirl2077
      @omggiiirl2077 6 років тому +2

      Ashley B. Lol I was just joking.....i remember when I had to deal with my 16 year younger sibling.....its challenging, and that sometimes really feels like the only solution. But truthfully, just let them be, in a few years, it will be a non issue, and you guys will be laughing about it.

  • @FemmedeFoi4078
    @FemmedeFoi4078 6 років тому

    She makes it look so easy

  • @galnamedtal
    @galnamedtal 6 років тому

    Oooh I like the when vs if distinction

  • @imvega07
    @imvega07 3 роки тому

    Blake is adorable!

  • @syl1286
    @syl1286 6 років тому

    She makes it so easy. They picked the kids that is Well behave to do the show. They should try it again when the kid is screaming and won't listen.

  • @Layla_Charlie
    @Layla_Charlie 6 років тому +14

    Grapes! Cut them , (or maybe it’s just me over paranoid 🙄)

    • @klrb93
      @klrb93 6 років тому +1

      Yes! I scrolled and scrolled looking for this comment lol.

    • @Lippymama
      @Lippymama 4 роки тому +1

      I was about to comment on that and saw this comment already!

  • @joevotto6512
    @joevotto6512 6 років тому +27

    My 8th graders can’t follow directions !!!!

  • @kitthecat6543
    @kitthecat6543 6 років тому +12

    These children are behaved... This wouldn't work on my son. Children will listen to strangers, not they're mothers... useless info

  • @herholisticpath7558
    @herholisticpath7558 6 років тому +31

    lol i clicked this video so fast

  • @Christian-xw8ne
    @Christian-xw8ne 6 років тому +5

    Use a lot of First and then commands, give choices, and Instead of get off the table, say something like,
    "Feet on floor"

  • @Serenityafterall
    @Serenityafterall 6 років тому +1

    SEND them to Grandma GMa !!!!!! 🙌🙌🙌🙌

  • @esharenee4186
    @esharenee4186 6 років тому +1

    This woman has some strong shoulders.

  • @thechildrensebookclub1838
    @thechildrensebookclub1838 6 років тому

    Good tips according to different ages.

  • @allnaturalindigo4893
    @allnaturalindigo4893 6 років тому +2

    My child was fully potty trained at 18 months and now at 2 and a half years old uses the actual toilet gets him own self dressed without my Direction all I have to say is we're about to go. He gets fully dressed down to socks shoes jacket if needed completely follows directions. these people are starting these children way too late

  • @wahitoperis3404
    @wahitoperis3404 6 років тому

    that advert is dope

  • @elenakushner127
    @elenakushner127 6 років тому +12

    by the book you're not supposed to say "she's a good girl" like the host did...
    then if they don't put on their close are they bad?

    • @lovedog49507
      @lovedog49507 6 років тому +2

      .Well, everyone have their own way of doing things.

    • @Tata-iu3fy
      @Tata-iu3fy 6 років тому +3

      Elena Kushner what book?

    • @adaharrisonn
      @adaharrisonn 6 років тому +4

      Elena Kushner flawed logic. Just because one thing is true doesnt mean the opposite is too. You sound like those annoying people who respond to "you look nice today" with "what, so I dont look nice all the time?!"

    • @Tata-iu3fy
      @Tata-iu3fy 6 років тому +1

      Ada Harrison 😂😂

    • @karchata7123
      @karchata7123 6 років тому +1

      its wrong to even call her a girl she hasnt decided yet ...... lolz

  • @lornatwins9944
    @lornatwins9944 3 роки тому

    Am hear looking at this and am thinking what even at five I will still have ask my child am already tired now he is just 2 gosh am exhausted

  • @ebunoluwataiwo9975
    @ebunoluwataiwo9975 6 років тому

    I was watchin gcse German revision approx 4 min ago how did i get here

  • @vanessabayardo9788
    @vanessabayardo9788 4 роки тому

    I try to get my nephew, also a toddler to help to clean the mess he made. And I'm not saying I ask him to do it by himself. I'm like come on lets clean up together. He says no and points at me to go sit there. I try not to let the situation escalate because I don't want his parents yelling at him or making him cry!

  • @toshajohnson3731
    @toshajohnson3731 6 років тому +3

    This child is not thinking about her or her assertive voice 🤔

  • @hinahinananoha7783
    @hinahinananoha7783 6 років тому

    Question 1: why listening is a good thing?

  • @relaxlove.3678
    @relaxlove.3678 6 років тому

    My friends boys be all over the place with her. But here, ummmmmmmmmmmmmmm......HAVE A SEAT!? okay. FINISH YOUR FOOD OR ITS GOING IN THE BIN...okay. CLEAN UP YOUR SPACE! got it... what else😂😂😂

  • @hymlog
    @hymlog 6 років тому +1

    ...PLAY BALL WITH THE PROBLEM ..GIVE THEM THE BALL ..WHEN THEY SLING THE BALL. ..YOU SLING THE BAT UNTIL YOU HIT SOMETHING ..BINGO ..YOU WIN!

  • @dasrazzul
    @dasrazzul 6 років тому +2

    Without raising your voice...that expert lady is CONSTANTLY SCREAMING AND HEY-ING THE CHILD! She even sings the instructions to make her sound more interesting to the child. She does not once engage Eye contact with the child, and does not even praise him for doing it right.
    Oh, and one task at a time? Yeah...Clean up, put this here, we put our toys here... NOT like a pro, lady. Gals, get your parentling advice somewhere else....

  • @PatmanAstro
    @PatmanAstro 3 роки тому

    I was waiting on the black version 🤣

  • @hitormiss9478
    @hitormiss9478 6 років тому

    Get those things done in their own home where they are comfortable. Those kids seem intimidated by the environment.

  • @ricardoseales6501
    @ricardoseales6501 3 роки тому

    Put these kids in a sound proof room so they can scream and yell period .

  • @kayzion3425
    @kayzion3425 6 років тому

    My 3 year old would of been playin with the toys .... he dont listen

  • @3brothersvwj896
    @3brothersvwj896 6 років тому +3

    Dont raise voice any higher, because your voice already very loud.

    • @leah8112
      @leah8112 6 років тому

      ua zoo tau zoo white exactly! She has a stern raised voice as it is! She's not shouting but she is loud

  • @MiriamA22
    @MiriamA22 6 років тому

    Toooooo muuuuuuch negotiation. I can understand being patient but if this persist, the child will start DEMANDING what s/he wants because the options are there.

  • @lilyraimey3499
    @lilyraimey3499 6 років тому +40

    I don't have (or want) children... Why am I here?

    • @imnotthebabydaddy
      @imnotthebabydaddy 6 років тому +5

      Me neither. I’m here out of curiosity.

    • @lovebug6388
      @lovebug6388 6 років тому +4

      Lily Raimey, oddly enough this works on adults, especially males. Give them options, win them over to your way of getting things done by making them think it was their idea in the first place. They will complete tasks quickly and minus the murmuring and complaining. This ignites creativity and problem solving and synergy amongst those whom you work with or work for you! Hope this helps!

    • @idiel24
      @idiel24 6 років тому +1

      Love Bug lol

    • @NycBeauty
      @NycBeauty 6 років тому

      Lily Raimey Hahahahaha. You are nosey or curious.

    • @sarahchick6838
      @sarahchick6838 6 років тому

      Lmao same.

  • @pedihotep3257
    @pedihotep3257 6 років тому +3

    Worthless info

  • @cherylmcleod6088
    @cherylmcleod6088 6 років тому +2

    She's raising her voice...you can't in a play voice they don't take you serious

  • @edunoeduno4980
    @edunoeduno4980 6 років тому +3

    raise your hand. that'll shut em up real good.

    • @omggiiirl2077
      @omggiiirl2077 6 років тому

      Eduno Eduno 😂😂😂😂😂

    • @hinahinananoha7783
      @hinahinananoha7783 6 років тому +1

      That's how you will be treated in the old age.

    • @omggiiirl2077
      @omggiiirl2077 6 років тому +4

      Nadiya Nanoha obviously you don't know the concept of a joke. And furthermore, I got spanked as a child, I would never hurt my Mother, your assumption is idiotic. Maybe try having a kid then speaking.

    • @hinahinananoha7783
      @hinahinananoha7783 6 років тому

      charlene hughes-peseta Very usual assumption then if you are an abusive parent, all other parents are abusive too....or they are not parents. Hm, and people still doubt that spanking fucks you for life. Get help. And I don't mean at as insult.

    • @candy5760
      @candy5760 6 років тому

      Spankings gets their attention real quick

  • @africancouscous
    @africancouscous 3 роки тому

    Belt.

  • @Courtt777
    @Courtt777 3 роки тому

    She was rude to the guest lol

  • @alexisanne4972
    @alexisanne4972 5 років тому

    This is terrible advice. You do not ask them if they want to do something (do you want to put your skirt on?) You TELL them. You are their parent. Stop coddling them.

  • @idahval
    @idahval 6 років тому

    But she speaks so loud

  • @purebitty8512
    @purebitty8512 6 років тому

    I thought this would help.... negative

  • @not_today_satan_7
    @not_today_satan_7 6 років тому

    Why not put them to bed in what their going to wear in the morning?

  • @vyvylin7796
    @vyvylin7796 3 роки тому

    Haha .. so unrealistic

  • @BeautifulBrainTrained
    @BeautifulBrainTrained 6 років тому +1

    Cringey!!!!!

  • @TheMarekduda
    @TheMarekduda 6 років тому +9

    The problem is maybe people give children to much love and freedom thats way the do not lisen