The son's posture becomes straighter and more prominent the more they open up to each other. Especially after the father talkes about loving him... Beautiful....
Folks keep commenting that Dad seems cold or passive to his sons feelings. I just want to acknowledge that sometimes when you really listen you dont have much to say back right away, especially when its hearing something that's hard to hear...the words are still settling in, and that means your honestly listening. Sometimes folks just need to be heard, and listened to and not have someone try to fix something for them. Maybe the son just needs to be heard and seen, and dad isn't pretending he can fix what hes already done. Maybe this is his way of being humble, not acting like he can just whipe away his mistakes with a "im sorry I love you." Maybe dad is holding back being angry and hes doing his very best right now. Maybe his son doesn't respond well to comfort unless it's the right moment and dad knows this and is doing his best to guess when that moment is. Maybe they've talked about this before on some level and they have a shared understanding about it we dont have. Maybe on camera is to vulnerable a place for dad to respond. Maybe having teenagers is one of the hardest relationships stages in life. Keep an open mind folks. We know so little.
@Susan Wilkerson.....very draining. There's a lot of unresolved pain between them....not sure they'll get it resolved over the next 2, 5 or 10 yrs. either.....I pray they will. ♡
How to destroy a growing man: Remove his voice, make your problem, his problems, confuse love with shame. Gorgeous young man, gain and grow your voice, arise from the authentic within, and heal. Much love.
Be his friend? This is so sad. I can feel the heaviness of the kid. The fact that he says "thanks" after his dad tells him that he loves him breaks my heart. Wish them healing.
I feel for Curtis. He obviously has a very low self-esteem and a broken relationship with his father. I don’t think his memory is to blame why he can’t remember any good memories with his father. You can tell that he thinks he’s a disappointment and that he has a strong memory of his father being mad at him when he was younger. It has stuck with him to this day and affected the way he thinks of himself. I wish him happiness, love and a stress less life❤️
Even though this was a very specifically fragile interaction to watch, I think what matters the most is that they are able to verbalize the love they very obviously have for each other. (And even though it's very easy to make an opinion either on the fathers' alleged coldness or his sons' unhappiness, I would just like to remind you all that there's a camera in the room. And even though The Skin Deep is making an absolutely amazing work and I'm sure they're making it as natural as possible, it's still an unusual and very delicate situation to be in. Also takes a lot of courage, maybe especially for Curtis & John, to do it. So thank you for this video and for providing the opportunity to see a bit from something as extraordinary and fascinating as human relationships.)
Notice how the kid’s posture changed when the father answered the “why do you love me?” question? He just stood up straight. Affirmation is all you need sometimes. It’s heartbreaking to see how the kid feels a lot of guilt for this broken relationship though.
I couldn't watch this to end, I stopped at 8:01 , I just had enough. The son's posture , it broke my heart, nobody should be this forlorn.. I wish the young man love and light ❤️
This is the most powerful segment of this series that I have ever seen. Thank you to both of them for being so willing to be vulnerable and share with us this moment. I will never forget this....
I’m curious what would be something you would want to tell your mom about raising you by herself and what would you say to your father if you had the chance
It kills my soul that parents don’t see what they do or impose on their children.... how THEY leave them broken, scarred, scared and feeling worthless. I hurt so bad for this young man. He just wants more of his dad.... his time, love and acceptance.
This was the most moving, sad conversation between father and son. I felt terribly sad for Curtis and thought there was so much he couldn't say. At times I thought John was cold and distant. His smile never convinced me. I couldn't believe his recounting of Curtis' birth being important because his mother in law was encouraged by his presence. Yet I heard John speak of the difficulty he has had in his life giving to others.
Dear Curtis' dad, 1. Your son needs you to be his loving father more than he will ever need you to be his friend. 2. He needs to be reassured that he brings you joy and is not a burden.
While I see that, I also see it as a response that his son doesn't owe him anything (cause he answered that he wants to help ease his dad's life) as to why he wanted to see his son be more comfortable with him. People differ and there's sometimes a difference between the comfortability of a father and a friend.
The son seems to be on the verge of tears all the time. This is a strained relationship - I think the son yearns for a better relationship with his dad. My heart aches for him
Feel so sad for the kid. Wishing him all the best. I hope I will become strong enough to talk more and more openly with my loved ones. So much stems from thoughts unsaid.
This is so painful that I had trouble watching the whole video. What a beautiful boy with such a beautiful soul. I don't know the dad's story, but sounds like he needs anger management and they both need counseling before his son is completely crushed. Dad needs to work on his problems without bringing Curtis into it. I get so angry at parents who focus on themselves so much that they forget how much emotional support children need.
Curtis is such a kind sweet heart. This made me really sad. You can tell how emotional he is, yet he doesn’t seem to know how to express that. And I can relate to that so much. I wish them both nothing but the best in life.
I think Curtis voiced his opinion most certainly and carefully. It takes a lot of courage to admit to your parent that there was a time when he was liked less and it’s beautiful to see that they have an relationship in which Curtis can express that to his father finally even though that is extremely painful to hear. It shows how far they have come and how far they will go!
We're all imperfect. Hope they aknowledge that the mere fact that both are willing to sit there, and answer those questions, show great love from both sides.
The father seemed so mindless of his son's experience. I feel so much for Curtis -- he needs nurturing and support -- not a father who is still a child.
Oh dear.. what a broken relationship.. so 1. the son does not have a single favorite memory of his father and him, 2. the father's memory of their first meeting (Curtis's birth) is the fact his grandmother healed from a stroke basically when holding him - so Curtis's birth is not about the Curtis, but about the grandmother.. how annulling of Curtis.. 3. Father does not want to share what he'd like Curtis to understand about him, rather turns it on Curtis's existing understanding of the father, and then basically says he wants to be himself (rather than his son having any expectations or wants from him), 4. he wants to be friends with Curtis.... and so on... Curtis is a broken young man, because of You dear father, not wanting to be one in the first place. You have a huge responsibility in this mess you've created with your son. Be an adult finally and stop being such a Narcissist and step up to the plate of fatherhood, if you have any good content in you, other than the anger and the feeling of being under-served in life.
S. I thought I was the only one that noticed the dad is showing traits of being emotionally abusive. I hope Curtis finds peace one day he seems extremely broken
@@amaryisblr2235 this is a "if I'm miserable in my life, why should you be better off" father . With all the effort, I just cannot find compassion for this father and his "victim" mentality. Curtis was a brand new being, worthy of all the love. But this father only knows the word and not the meaning of it.. sorry.
This was heartbreaking to watch...they seemed so restrained and hesitant to express themselves. But the hug at the end was beautiful...they're both trying to be there for each other and I hope their relationship grows stronger with time. Sending lots of love.
That’s so sweet that Curtis’ wish was to help his dad out so that he can have more free time 😭😭😭😭😭❤️❤️❤️💞💞💞💞and to be able to talk with him. Such a sweet video.
Wow ❤️ I wish I could give them both a hug. Being a human is filled with so much learning and uncertainty. I am grateful that people are willing to share these powerful discussions.
This was so heartbreaking. I hope that Curtis's father will be able to step up to the plate in the future. But more importantly I hope that Curtis will be able to find a mentor who can fill the gap left by his father. Sadly some people (in this case parent) never change or see their wrong doings and that's why it's so important for kids to have people they can look up to like a teacher, mentor, coach, youth counselor, etc. who can be there for them in a healthy way.
They needed this but it only scratched the surface. I feel a lot of unspoken feelings and emotions. A lot still stuck inside. I hope they find away to talk and listen, validate and make adjustments. 🙏
Based on the comments I've read I expected a completely different video. Yes, all of the sadness on both ends but the dad is showing vulnerability too. Both are so incredibly human and we humans are messy. Good on both of them for having this conversation together at ALL let alone on camera like this. It clearly didn't come easily and I think this could be a really beautiful beginning for them both.
I just want to give big hugs to Curtis and also tell him all will be well! Don’t carry your parents burden on your shoulder! He is free from that bondage today!!! This world is a better place because he is in it
I love this conversation!!!! There's so much hope and a clear desire for a better relationship in the future. You can tell from Curtis's immediate request for a hug that he's fine!! A lot of you have built a whole Netflix special on what's wrong here, ignoring what is clearly growth between then.
Reading especially critical comments of the father...a lot of respect and credit that he had the courage to expose himself in this authentic space. Wished we would all judge less and love more.
Definitely not. Not everyone is great at expressing emotion - especially western men of his father's generation. To parents, 17 year olds are impossibly hard to relate to. Father says he wants to be friends with his son, he wants to be there. This is a cold relationship, for sure, but there is nothing here that screams abuse. Do not be so casual with your accusations.
oh wow, I did not expect the flow of emotions watching this video. So much shyness so much unsaid things. You could see Curtis opening up as the video went along.
It's so sad when you have to seek for parental love. I really don't know the case and even with so much noticeable flaws, the father tries to reach his son, but try isn't enough sometimes. I have a conflicted relationship with my own father. He abandons me emotionally and after the divorce, he didn't try to find me as his son. He continues to be absent in every single way. Even when supported me financially for some years, he never asked me if I needed him or needed something else. He mistreated my mom being an abusive husband, called her names and the same things he did with me, he did to my elder sister. Today I don't try to seek for his love, approval or anything like that. I learned that I have to be good to my mom, my sister and all kind of people. He shows me the person that I don't like to be. I hope Curtis could be able to find himself besides all the sadness between him and his father and reach self-love and his love as well if he likes. Raise yourself, Curtis, from this short video you were able to show the amazing person you are! I hope John could be more present emotionally and physically to his sons.
Wow, this is the story of my life. No connection with my father whats so ever. He was never around for his kids. This father is emotional disconnected. There is a different between father and dad. I dont know the whole story here, but this is a man who shouldnt be a dad (have kids) and the same applied for my father. He was just useless!
@@maldoror6128 I been through the same thing you have experienced growing up with yr father. He work, travel, cheated on my mothe too. The only different is he told my sisters and brothers to leave his house, when reached 16 and. I left at 17 with no financial support. It was though, but we all made it and went have a good carreer of our own. Hope things are going well for you too. 🙌😊
I was trying so hard not to jump to conclusions because I wanted to watch the whole thing through without any preconceptions but the dad just reminds me so much of some dads I have known with extreme anger issues who blame & harm their own children regularly but pretend later on in life that they were just this nice, caring guy all along. The kind of parent that keeps their own kid begging for approval by giving them only crumbs, mainly because they themselves are emotionally deficient. When the son keeps saying his “memory is bad” and that’s why he can’t remember any good times with his dad, I keep thinking that there probably weren’t many, or that they were heavily overshadowed by the many bad ones. People say don’t assume the worst, but most of us get that gut feeling if we’ve experienced it firsthand or watched a loved one suffer it. Watching this video made my stomach churn. I hated seeing the dad smile at all the weirdest, most awkward times. It seems like not only can he not handle the sons painful emotions, but he tries to smooth them over with a cheesy grin and stories of how many “good times” they did have but he just can’t remember. That’s not even projection onto his behavior, that is him straight up gaslighting his son on camera. If it was just a smile you could say maybe it was awkwardness with heavy subjects and emotion, but he never recognizes that he contributed to how his son feels and apologizes. He also let his son take all of the blame for “being a little shit” when he was younger, clearly the logic he gave his own son for why he treated them the way he did. Basically, it sounds like he raised his son to believe their lack of a close relationship was all his fault for not being good enough when really it’s the father who was and still is inadequate. Now he wants to “be friends”? That’s a privilege, a privilege you only get when you’ve raised your child so well that you can be close like parent and child as well as, to an extent, friends into their adult years. You don’t get that when you skipped out on building a positive relationship with your child when they needed your unconditional love, support and guidance the most as a child and a developing human being. “You reap what you sow” is a pretty fitting allegory for that situation, but unfortunately that’s what he’s telling his son instead of himself. The parent has that responsibility in the parent child relationship for obvious reasons. It is not a peer relationship.
This was so hardest to watch... There's is love, it hasn't always been radiant, some deceptions and back holdings... But there is love. Thanks, #theskindeep 💜
a sad yet beautiful paradox. there is obviously a great disconnection, yet also the sign of new life arising. i feel for both of these men. everyone commenting negatively about the father must try to remember that he too is human, makes mistakes, just like the rest of us. how can we judge him based on a 12 minute video. perhaps the father's father struggled to express his emotions, didnt express his love- its a hard thing to learn and pass on when you werent raised with it yourself. i feel compassion for him and think he is trying his best to give his son something that wasnt gifted to him. i hope both these men can reconnect and remind eachother that vulnerability and emotion is healing.
There is a lot going on here, which they either cant or dont want to talk about. If you are unable to speak your mind it is either from the fear of rejection, embarrassment or dissapointment. The voice of the boy speaks volumes. He has a lot of fears burried deep into his mind, which he feels is not able to share. Due to the fights they had, the son never felt accepted. To hear the words, "i love you" can heal a lot, but only when it is also felt and shown in so many ways, which i dont think transpired clear enough. It is simply hard to hear these words, but cannot feel it. Talking about best friends, doesent cut it either. A parent is not your best friend. A parent is the one pillar that never lets you down, no matter what happens. A friend cannot provide that. So to me it seems like a disconnection.
Such a handsome and amazing young man!! I hope he finds his place in this big world!! 💙🌍 I’d love to criticize the father but that won’t help, as a parent I know it’s hard. We try our best and often fail, I just hope he uses this experience to learn and grow and become a better man, role model, and parent!! 🙏🏼🤞🏻
They have ackward moments, it seems they are seldom to see each other. The son looks very shy with his father, but when he asked "Why u love me" to his father, it changes the atmosphere and his posture. You see his smile and acceptance. They both sincere to each other. Hope they spend more time together and enjoy each other company.
Curtis, if you read this... You're not defined by the way your father loves you. It broke my heart to hear you say that memory wasn't good enough. You are enough. Just because you can't remember a good memory with your dad doesn't mean you're at fault. It could just mean that those moments weren't as happy as you'd wish them to be. I'm sure your dad has his reasons for not answering to those things you said the way you would want him to answer. Maybe he doesn't know how to. He's human, just like you. But you are enough.
I mean this in the most respectful way, but the son to me looks like he has a form of autism ( certain spectrum)... Reminds me of my little brother in a way. Just the way he expresses himself... The way of overthinking and communicating and seeing fault in himself in a really dry technical way... When reading a lot of the comments I am surprised people atribute it to just being "desperately shy or emotinally crippled". I see a person just being in a totally different wave length when communicating. And also looking at the body language, I see some traits popping up. But I am happy to see that there is a moment taking place in this session with the both of them. The moment of when the Son is saying he was a piece of shit when being Younger, just looking at the dad. I think he was really open for once (the son) and the dad just was really taking it in. I think it did them really good. Really loved this video
This is how NARCISSISTIC pathetic parent can hv a smug grin on his face at the brokenness of his son & still make it about himself...smh. My heart aches for the son poor baby. ♡
West Coast Cali you don’t know their story, only what they chose to share. There seems to be a lot of pain on both sides. Don’t jump to conclusions when you don’t have the facts.
@@2010muah Thanks, I am aware of that. None of us know their ENTIRE story, but I am/we ALL are allowed to voice my/our opinion, based off the video excerpt provided. My comment derives from similar traits/patterns based on cases I've counseled over the years. Anyway, thank u for expressing ur opinion about my comment :-) be well!
Don't throw around the word narcissist. I'm a child of one and Curtis's dad is nothing like it. He admitted that he doesn't do everything right. He was empathetic towards his kid... don't say that word without knowing more about the situation
theres this deep yet painfully transient love between them. curtis is a beautiful soul, lots of pain but within that all the space to grow. very illuminating to the power and responsibility of caretakers to heal, not hurt with words.
I sympathize with with the boy . Actually hurts my heart . Waiting for him to share his feelings but not .. something seems so off 5:53 “I’m not sure if I should say ..” His father smiling seemingly trying to move on from the question or his sons answer it seems while his son just has so much pain in his eyes
The son's posture becomes straighter and more prominent the more they open up to each other. Especially after the father talkes about loving him... Beautiful....
Great eye for that! Didn't think or notice it. :)
Yes ❤️love that!
People respond well to nurturing, nourishment. Much like how a plant needs water to thrives we humans flourish when surrounded by TLC.
Beautiful observation of a beautiful moment.
Folks keep commenting that Dad seems cold or passive to his sons feelings. I just want to acknowledge that sometimes when you really listen you dont have much to say back right away, especially when its hearing something that's hard to hear...the words are still settling in, and that means your honestly listening. Sometimes folks just need to be heard, and listened to and not have someone try to fix something for them. Maybe the son just needs to be heard and seen, and dad isn't pretending he can fix what hes already done. Maybe this is his way of being humble, not acting like he can just whipe away his mistakes with a "im sorry I love you." Maybe dad is holding back being angry and hes doing his very best right now. Maybe his son doesn't respond well to comfort unless it's the right moment and dad knows this and is doing his best to guess when that moment is. Maybe they've talked about this before on some level and they have a shared understanding about it we dont have. Maybe on camera is to vulnerable a place for dad to respond. Maybe having teenagers is one of the hardest relationships stages in life. Keep an open mind folks. We know so little.
Yes. This ❤️❤️❤️
Beautiful comment 😌
Hannah Boutilier if more people thought this way can you imagine the Mother Earth we would live on? 🌼🌻🌻
Thanks for saying this, thanks so much
AMEN
Felt for the son, he looks emotionally broken. This drained me emotionally. My heart breaks for them both, hope their can become closer.
Can you explain me what this video was about
@Susan Wilkerson.....very draining. There's a lot of unresolved pain between them....not sure they'll get it resolved over the next 2, 5 or 10 yrs. either.....I pray they will. ♡
ibro khan About father and son opening up to each other about their feelings.
How to destroy a growing man: Remove his voice, make your problem, his problems, confuse love with shame. Gorgeous young man, gain and grow your voice, arise from the authentic within, and heal. Much love.
This.... This comment right here... So elequent and strongly stated. I hope everyone sees this.
My GOD this comment hit home!!! Who said it??! 🙏🏽
Cynthia Volkmann how did come up with this?
@@great-full3612 I've lived it.
@Cynthia Volkmann....AMEN SISTA!
Be his friend? This is so sad. I can feel the heaviness of the kid. The fact that he says "thanks" after his dad tells him that he loves him breaks my heart. Wish them healing.
I've not cried this much over a UA-cam video in a long time.
Curtis is such a beautiful soul. I wish him all the love in the world.
Me too from Townsville Australia x
I feel for Curtis. He obviously has a very low self-esteem and a broken relationship with his father. I don’t think his memory is to blame why he can’t remember any good memories with his father. You can tell that he thinks he’s a disappointment and that he has a strong memory of his father being mad at him when he was younger. It has stuck with him to this day and affected the way he thinks of himself. I wish him happiness, love and a stress less life❤️
Even though this was a very specifically fragile interaction to watch, I think what matters the most is that they are able to verbalize the love they very obviously have for each other. (And even though it's very easy to make an opinion either on the fathers' alleged coldness or his sons' unhappiness, I would just like to remind you all that there's a camera in the room. And even though The Skin Deep is making an absolutely amazing work and I'm sure they're making it as natural as possible, it's still an unusual and very delicate situation to be in. Also takes a lot of courage, maybe especially for Curtis & John, to do it. So thank you for this video and for providing the opportunity to see a bit from something as extraordinary and fascinating as human relationships.)
Notice how the kid’s posture changed when the father answered the “why do you love me?” question? He just stood up straight. Affirmation is all you need sometimes.
It’s heartbreaking to see how the kid feels a lot of guilt for this broken relationship though.
Great observation. I saw that too.
Yes ❤️ beautiful
I think he did that to show his height after his dad talked about ho big he was getting...
He doesn't have to feel responsible for the broken relationship...the father should do something about it.
I couldn't watch this to end, I stopped at 8:01 , I just had enough.
The son's posture , it broke my heart, nobody should be this forlorn..
I wish the young man love and light ❤️
This is the most powerful segment of this series that I have ever seen. Thank you to both of them for being so willing to be vulnerable and share with us this moment. I will never forget this....
i agree. most powerful.
When he said “hug?” At the end my heart melted 🥺
I feel Skin Deep isn't about analysing what you're watching but feeling what you're seeing
beautifully put :'))
You are my inspiration by the way Wayne
I’m curious what would be something you would want to tell your mom about raising you by herself and what would you say to your father if you had the chance
Great comment...appreciating to remember all of us to feel rather than judge. Right o spot!
It kills my soul that parents don’t see what they do or impose on their children.... how THEY leave them broken, scarred, scared and feeling worthless. I hurt so bad for this young man. He just wants more of his dad.... his time, love and acceptance.
This was the most moving, sad conversation between father and son. I felt terribly sad for Curtis and thought there was so much he couldn't say. At times I thought John was cold and distant. His smile never convinced me. I couldn't believe his recounting of Curtis' birth being important because his mother in law was encouraged by his presence. Yet I heard John speak of the difficulty he has had in his life giving to others.
Dear Curtis' dad,
1. Your son needs you to be his loving father more than he will ever need you to be his friend.
2. He needs to be reassured that he brings you joy and is not a burden.
Hmm, I felt that honey.
While I see that, I also see it as a response that his son doesn't owe him anything (cause he answered that he wants to help ease his dad's life) as to why he wanted to see his son be more comfortable with him. People differ and there's sometimes a difference between the comfortability of a father and a friend.
The son seems to be on the verge of tears all the time. This is a strained relationship - I think the son yearns for a better relationship with his dad. My heart aches for him
The son seem to be painfully shy.
I think he was shamed a lot growing up. Shame causes shyness I believe.
That is painfully obvious
Feel so sad for the kid. Wishing him all the best. I hope I will become strong enough to talk more and more openly with my loved ones. So much stems from thoughts unsaid.
this channel never fails to make me cry huh
This is so painful that I had trouble watching the whole video. What a beautiful boy with such a beautiful soul. I don't know the dad's story, but sounds like he needs anger management and they both need counseling before his son is completely crushed. Dad needs to work on his problems without bringing Curtis into it. I get so angry at parents who focus on themselves so much that they forget how much emotional support children need.
Amen sista!
Exactly what i thought
Yessss!!
Thank you!!
100% what I thought watching.
So sad that you see the impact the dad has on his son so much
Curtis is such a kind sweet heart. This made me really sad. You can tell how emotional he is, yet he doesn’t seem to know how to express that. And I can relate to that so much. I wish them both nothing but the best in life.
I think Curtis voiced his opinion most certainly and carefully. It takes a lot of courage to admit to your parent that there was a time when he was liked less and it’s beautiful to see that they have an relationship in which Curtis can express that to his father finally even though that is extremely painful to hear. It shows how far they have come and how far they will go!
Powerful stuff. We need to talk to our loved ones, so much more.
I like that Curtis thanks his dad with every kind word he has to him. 👨👦
So much pain from the son... breaks my heart💔
6:20 aww Dad missed a huge moment to provide support & add context... I hope they're doing well. ❤
We're all imperfect. Hope they aknowledge that the mere fact that both are willing to sit there, and answer those questions, show great love from both sides.
i just feel so much empathy for the son
The father seemed so mindless of his son's experience. I feel so much for Curtis -- he needs nurturing and support -- not a father who is still a child.
Oh dear.. what a broken relationship.. so 1. the son does not have a single favorite memory of his father and him, 2. the father's memory of their first meeting (Curtis's birth) is the fact his grandmother healed from a stroke basically when holding him - so Curtis's birth is not about the Curtis, but about the grandmother.. how annulling of Curtis.. 3. Father does not want to share what he'd like Curtis to understand about him, rather turns it on Curtis's existing understanding of the father, and then basically says he wants to be himself (rather than his son having any expectations or wants from him), 4. he wants to be friends with Curtis.... and so on... Curtis is a broken young man, because of You dear father, not wanting to be one in the first place. You have a huge responsibility in this mess you've created with your son. Be an adult finally and stop being such a Narcissist and step up to the plate of fatherhood, if you have any good content in you, other than the anger and the feeling of being under-served in life.
Take a breath... you are right though... 100%
S. I thought I was the only one that noticed the dad is showing traits of being emotionally abusive. I hope Curtis finds peace one day he seems extremely broken
@@amaryisblr2235 this is a "if I'm miserable in my life, why should you be better off" father . With all the effort, I just cannot find compassion for this father and his "victim" mentality. Curtis was a brand new being, worthy of all the love. But this father only knows the word and not the meaning of it.. sorry.
@@kslucki Spot on!!!
@S.......VERY WELL SAID & ACCURATE!!!! Applause!
Yeah keep straightening up Cyrus. Sit confidently and say it with your chest. You’re cute and can tell you have a gentle soul.
The way Curtis sat up. He needs so much love. I hope and wish him well. I hope he finds someone to love him unconditionally. He's a beautiful soul.
his hair is on fleek tho
This was heartbreaking to watch...they seemed so restrained and hesitant to express themselves. But the hug at the end was beautiful...they're both trying to be there for each other and I hope their relationship grows stronger with time. Sending lots of love.
That’s so sweet that Curtis’ wish was to help his dad out so that he can have more free time 😭😭😭😭😭❤️❤️❤️💞💞💞💞and to be able to talk with him. Such a sweet video.
I just want to give this young man a hug. I feel he is having a conversation I should have had with my dad.
Oh, Curtis! 💔 I Just want to give you a big old hug!
Wow ❤️ I wish I could give them both a hug. Being a human is filled with so much learning and uncertainty. I am grateful that people are willing to share these powerful discussions.
CURTIS IS SO BEAUTIFUL!!!!I HOPE HE GETS MORE CONFIDENCE BECAUSE HE'S AWESOME 💜HE SEEMS SOOO KIND
My heart breaks. Curtis is such a sweet sweet soul ❤️
One of the toughest videos to watch on your channel, I would love to see u guys bringing them back in 10 years.
This was so heartbreaking. I hope that Curtis's father will be able to step up to the plate in the future. But more importantly I hope that Curtis will be able to find a mentor who can fill the gap left by his father. Sadly some people (in this case parent) never change or see their wrong doings and that's why it's so important for kids to have people they can look up to like a teacher, mentor, coach, youth counselor, etc. who can be there for them in a healthy way.
They needed this but it only scratched the surface. I feel a lot of unspoken feelings and emotions. A lot still stuck inside. I hope they find away to talk and listen, validate and make adjustments. 🙏
That posture got my back aching
Based on the comments I've read I expected a completely different video. Yes, all of the sadness on both ends but the dad is showing vulnerability too. Both are so incredibly human and we humans are messy. Good on both of them for having this conversation together at ALL let alone on camera like this. It clearly didn't come easily and I think this could be a really beautiful beginning for them both.
This broke me the fuck down. This channel is so important.
I feel like their relationship will grow because of this conversation. I wish them the best!!
They both want it but they both don’t know how to express it. Loved the future plans and the hug. 🤍
I just want to give big hugs to Curtis and also tell him all will be well! Don’t carry your parents burden on your shoulder! He is free from that bondage today!!! This world is a better place because he is in it
Couldn't finish it. Really tugs at your emotions. Wishing the best for both father and son.
I love this conversation!!!! There's so much hope and a clear desire for a better relationship in the future. You can tell from Curtis's immediate request for a hug that he's fine!! A lot of you have built a whole Netflix special on what's wrong here, ignoring what is clearly growth between then.
Curtis is a very beautiful human being. Wanna hug him for hours.
This has to be one of my favourite episodes, I'm so moved.
A safe space is needed for this relationahip to have a fighting chance.Cute son.
I've never been this early.
Definitely coming back for the comments
What a beautiful video. I feel they are teaching other sooooo much! Valuable lessons aren’t the easiest.
Reading especially critical comments of the father...a lot of respect and credit that he had the courage to expose himself in this authentic space. Wished we would all judge less and love more.
Awwww that was a painfully beautiful experience ! I wish them much success in their healing process
Can't think of any happy memories, but has to decide which fight to talk about....
I empathize with this kid....
"You are in my life because of love, Chris."
Well, that's the sweetest thing I've heard in my life.
They are both so very precious and trying so hard it’s beautiful to watch .
Something is giving me a strong vibe the dad is emotionally abusive. Something here is off to me idk
Definitely ....it's sad ..
Same!!
Definitely not. Not everyone is great at expressing emotion - especially western men of his father's generation. To parents, 17 year olds are impossibly hard to relate to. Father says he wants to be friends with his son, he wants to be there. This is a cold relationship, for sure, but there is nothing here that screams abuse. Do not be so casual with your accusations.
amaryis warren I don't think we've seen enough to come to that conclusion. It's clearly a fractured relationship. That's all we can deduce.
💜Watch with interest, not judgement. Please.💚
Wow, this is so touching. Seems like they never usually open up and they were finally able to connect
Curtis has a beautiful smile and a kind heart. I pray he this this message and receive it in his heart. 💜
oh wow, I did not expect the flow of emotions watching this video.
So much shyness so much unsaid things. You could see Curtis opening up as the video went along.
So many words being “said” but not literally said
It's so sad when you have to seek for parental love. I really don't know the case and even with so much noticeable flaws, the father tries to reach his son, but try isn't enough sometimes. I have a conflicted relationship with my own father. He abandons me emotionally and after the divorce, he didn't try to find me as his son. He continues to be absent in every single way. Even when supported me financially for some years, he never asked me if I needed him or needed something else. He mistreated my mom being an abusive husband, called her names and the same things he did with me, he did to my elder sister.
Today I don't try to seek for his love, approval or anything like that. I learned that I have to be good to my mom, my sister and all kind of people. He shows me the person that I don't like to be. I hope Curtis could be able to find himself besides all the sadness between him and his father and reach self-love and his love as well if he likes.
Raise yourself, Curtis, from this short video you were able to show the amazing person you are! I hope John could be more present emotionally and physically to his sons.
Wow, this is the story of my life. No connection with my father whats so ever. He was never around for his kids. This father is emotional disconnected. There is a different between father and dad. I dont know the whole story here, but this is a man who shouldnt be a dad (have kids) and the same applied for my father. He was just useless!
@@querida1809 It's so sad...
@@maldoror6128 I been through the same thing you have experienced growing up with yr father. He work, travel, cheated on my mothe too. The only different is he told my sisters and brothers to leave his house, when reached 16 and. I left at 17 with no financial support. It was though, but we all made it and went have a good carreer of our own. Hope things are going well for you too. 🙌😊
Seems like alot of us can relate to your story and it's so sad that we've had to learn to accept it and move on.
How did the father hear what the son said at 6:30 and didn’t say anything?
@Rheem Khattar......exactly....he said NOTHING!
I couldn’t hear him clearly, what did he say?
@@leastar8518 "If I hadn't been a piece of shit when I was younger and hadn't gotten you angry, perhaps that wouldn't be the case."
I wondered this too. This was the most heartbreaking part for me. :(
Because he probably told him that when he was younger...
Oh that was so hard to watch. Heart wrenching that there is such an emotional wall between them. I hope they can both heal.
I was trying so hard not to jump to conclusions because I wanted to watch the whole thing through without any preconceptions but the dad just reminds me so much of some dads I have known with extreme anger issues who blame & harm their own children regularly but pretend later on in life that they were just this nice, caring guy all along. The kind of parent that keeps their own kid begging for approval by giving them only crumbs, mainly because they themselves are emotionally deficient.
When the son keeps saying his “memory is bad” and that’s why he can’t remember any good times with his dad, I keep thinking that there probably weren’t many, or that they were heavily overshadowed by the many bad ones. People say don’t assume the worst, but most of us get that gut feeling if we’ve experienced it firsthand or watched a loved one suffer it. Watching this video made my stomach churn. I hated seeing the dad smile at all the weirdest, most awkward times. It seems like not only can he not handle the sons painful emotions, but he tries to smooth them over with a cheesy grin and stories of how many “good times” they did have but he just can’t remember. That’s not even projection onto his behavior, that is him straight up gaslighting his son on camera. If it was just a smile you could say maybe it was awkwardness with heavy subjects and emotion, but he never recognizes that he contributed to how his son feels and apologizes.
He also let his son take all of the blame for “being a little shit” when he was younger, clearly the logic he gave his own son for why he treated them the way he did. Basically, it sounds like he raised his son to believe their lack of a close relationship was all his fault for not being good enough when really it’s the father who was and still is inadequate. Now he wants to “be friends”? That’s a privilege, a privilege you only get when you’ve raised your child so well that you can be close like parent and child as well as, to an extent, friends into their adult years. You don’t get that when you skipped out on building a positive relationship with your child when they needed your unconditional love, support and guidance the most as a child and a developing human being. “You reap what you sow” is a pretty fitting allegory for that situation, but unfortunately that’s what he’s telling his son instead of himself. The parent has that responsibility in the parent child relationship for obvious reasons. It is not a peer relationship.
I stumbled upon this video. I'm glad I did. I needed this.
This was so hardest to watch...
There's is love, it hasn't always been radiant, some deceptions and back holdings... But there is love.
Thanks, #theskindeep 💜
His eyes🥺 his carrying a lot...I hope comfort and love to you Curtis and your dad too.
His son has some obvious issues with his dad. That was painful to watch but glad that this was able to take place.
a sad yet beautiful paradox. there is obviously a great disconnection, yet also the sign of new life arising. i feel for both of these men. everyone commenting negatively about the father must try to remember that he too is human, makes mistakes, just like the rest of us. how can we judge him based on a 12 minute video. perhaps the father's father struggled to express his emotions, didnt express his love- its a hard thing to learn and pass on when you werent raised with it yourself. i feel compassion for him and think he is trying his best to give his son something that wasnt gifted to him. i hope both these men can reconnect and remind eachother that vulnerability and emotion is healing.
The father has something in his face like Jack Nicholson in Shining. It’s scary....
This was hard to watch . They both seem like they’re in so much pain and have trouble communicating but the love is there.
I love this episode very encouraging!
There is a lot going on here, which they either cant or dont want to talk about.
If you are unable to speak your mind it is either from the fear of rejection, embarrassment or dissapointment.
The voice of the boy speaks volumes. He has a lot of fears burried deep into his mind, which he feels is not able to share.
Due to the fights they had, the son never felt accepted.
To hear the words, "i love you" can heal a lot, but only when it is also felt and shown in so many ways, which i dont think transpired clear enough.
It is simply hard to hear these words, but cannot feel it.
Talking about best friends, doesent cut it either. A parent is not your best friend. A parent is the one pillar that never lets you down, no matter what happens. A friend cannot provide that. So to me it seems like a disconnection.
There is something wrong and weird about this conversation.. It's depressing.
Cried my eyes out 😢
Lovely young man seems so lost x
Sorry dad, but it feels like you're waiting to get paid after this to get your beers after. 🤣
Such a handsome and amazing young man!! I hope he finds his place in this big world!! 💙🌍
I’d love to criticize the father but that won’t help, as a parent I know it’s hard. We try our best and often fail, I just hope he uses this experience to learn and grow and become a better man, role model, and parent!! 🙏🏼🤞🏻
They have ackward moments, it seems they are seldom to see each other. The son looks very shy with his father, but when he asked "Why u love me" to his father, it changes the atmosphere and his posture. You see his smile and acceptance. They both sincere to each other. Hope they spend more time together and enjoy each other company.
Curtis is so cute, he reminds me of Paul Rust
Curtis, if you read this... You're not defined by the way your father loves you. It broke my heart to hear you say that memory wasn't good enough. You are enough. Just because you can't remember a good memory with your dad doesn't mean you're at fault. It could just mean that those moments weren't as happy as you'd wish them to be. I'm sure your dad has his reasons for not answering to those things you said the way you would want him to answer. Maybe he doesn't know how to. He's human, just like you. But you are enough.
I mean this in the most respectful way, but the son to me looks like he has a form of autism ( certain spectrum)... Reminds me of my little brother in a way. Just the way he expresses himself... The way of overthinking and communicating and seeing fault in himself in a really dry technical way... When reading a lot of the comments I am surprised people atribute it to just being "desperately shy or emotinally crippled". I see a person just being in a totally different wave length when communicating. And also looking at the body language, I see some traits popping up. But I am happy to see that there is a moment taking place in this session with the both of them. The moment of when the Son is saying he was a piece of shit when being Younger, just looking at the dad. I think he was really open for once (the son) and the dad just was really taking it in. I think it did them really good. Really loved this video
This is how NARCISSISTIC pathetic parent can hv a smug grin on his face at the brokenness of his son & still make it about himself...smh.
My heart aches for the son poor baby. ♡
It’s all about power. I’m the strong father n look at you. It’s bullshit parenting to the core n it needs to stop.
West Coast Cali you don’t know their story, only what they chose to share. There seems to be a lot of pain on both sides. Don’t jump to conclusions when you don’t have the facts.
@@2010muah Thanks, I am aware of that. None of us know their ENTIRE story, but I am/we ALL are allowed to voice my/our opinion, based off the video excerpt provided. My comment derives from similar traits/patterns based on cases I've counseled over the years. Anyway, thank u for expressing ur opinion about my comment :-) be well!
Don't throw around the word narcissist. I'm a child of one and Curtis's dad is nothing like it. He admitted that he doesn't do everything right. He was empathetic towards his kid... don't say that word without knowing more about the situation
@@breathing_helium_art Thanks for ur feedback, but my Dad is a narcissist as well, but as u know they hv many traits....
Kid blamed himself for his dad getting angry at him "maybe if I wasn't a piece of shit when I was younger". I want to give him a big hug.
what in tarnation was going on with the camera in the beginning omg
The dad's vibes destabilized it
Gentle souls! Love it! Please invite them back! 💛
The father reminds me of Jack from The Shining..
theres this deep yet painfully transient love between them. curtis is a beautiful soul, lots of pain but within that all the space to grow.
very illuminating to the power and responsibility of caretakers to heal, not hurt with words.
Anyone have Curtis’s social media? I just wanna give him a hug and be a source of positivity for the guy.
seriously, his eyes at 8:10 brought me to tears.
for me, it was when he just asked "hug?" at the very end.
I would give anything to hug my dad one more time.
This hits home. Hard.
I sympathize with with the boy . Actually hurts my heart . Waiting for him to share his feelings but not .. something seems so off
5:53 “I’m not sure if I should say ..”
His father smiling seemingly trying to move on from the question or his sons answer it seems while his son just has so much pain in his eyes