10 Years of Therapy in 10 Minutes

Поділитися
Вставка
  • Опубліковано 29 лис 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ •

  • @ConnorFranta
    @ConnorFranta  Рік тому +345

    Oops forgot to leave a top comment. Bit of a more vulnerable video, but I think talking about this topic can provide a lot of comfort for people. Thanks for watching - sending you all my love, and I'll see you soon! ❤❤❤

    • @adamsmith4787
      @adamsmith4787 Рік тому +2

      Ok serious reply. It was fantastic! Great topic and very funny as always. We appreciate you.

    • @Peachystreams
      @Peachystreams Рік тому +2

      absolutely love this video, so well said.

    • @shakurwonders5216
      @shakurwonders5216 Рік тому

      Love u Connor

    • @oceanwonders
      @oceanwonders Рік тому

      That pathway that you were riding that was easy and familiar is a previously-established neuronet. When neurons fire the same pattern enough, they wire together. That's how we develop skills, but also habits good and bad, and habitual ways of thinking and feeling.

    • @oceanwonders
      @oceanwonders Рік тому +1

      Your smile lights you up.

  • @keeleyapperley1
    @keeleyapperley1 Рік тому +1545

    you calling yourself a 30 year old just made me shiver, when did we all just AGE??? you’re still 21 in my mind!

    • @ConnorFranta
      @ConnorFranta  Рік тому +563

      no im pretty sure im still 19

    • @SamUSB5000
      @SamUSB5000 Рік тому +26

      @@ConnorFranta and I agree ! You look fantastic 🙂

    • @alinasophie_d
      @alinasophie_d Рік тому +21

      ​@@ConnorFranta you don't seem like that though. You're way to mature to seem like 19 or 21 and it's actually amazing to see how much growth you've gone through since you were that age 🤍

    • @kairyan6115
      @kairyan6115 Рік тому +27

      30 isn’t old calm down

    • @staciii
      @staciii Рік тому +6

      ​@@kairyan6115 "calm down" no one said 30 is old. A 10 year difference is just shocking when you compare age 20 to 30

  • @erinherzog9466
    @erinherzog9466 Рік тому +401

    As a therapist, I thoroughly enjoyed this ☺️

    • @ConnorFranta
      @ConnorFranta  Рік тому +45

      aw, im glad! thanks for watching ❤

  • @SuperMiau3
    @SuperMiau3 Рік тому +237

    I have been in therapy for almost a year, and something that I learned so far is that the things that made you go to therapy are not going to dissappear, but you will be able to manage your emotions, your tougths and the way that you react to those things in a healthy way.

    • @naomijenkins7848
      @naomijenkins7848 Рік тому +5

      i can second this, as a now mentally healthy-ish person

    • @ameliabenitez3452
      @ameliabenitez3452 Рік тому +1

      not related but im the 111th like!

    • @BusinessHealthMasters
      @BusinessHealthMasters Рік тому +1

      Yes, it is a lifelong work. Whether or not we had trauma.

    • @Kuhreenuh13
      @Kuhreenuh13 9 місяців тому

      Yes! All my feelings and anxiety never go away. But I have the tools to manage them better and not have everything feel so heavy.

  • @SidneyRachelle
    @SidneyRachelle Рік тому +49

    "Other people don't know what you're thinking" is such an obvious phrase, and yet I've lived my whole life feeling like my whole existence has been recorded and perceived by all of the people around me, it's such a helpful reminder.

  • @ameliaruth5980
    @ameliaruth5980 Рік тому +538

    the amount of safety i feel when watching his videos is insane. when i sit down and watch connor i feel like my entire body and heart and soul and connection to the world just relaxes. i want to have chats with him all the time he's such a wholesome and genuine human being

    • @ConnorFranta
      @ConnorFranta  Рік тому +93

      this brings me so much joy. im glad i can be a safe space for y'all!

    • @ambercooper4676
      @ambercooper4676 Рік тому +2

      Both of Conor’s books have helped me feel so seen and helped me heal from a lot
      Of seasons of depression of been in. I’ll never forget picking up his first book and finally feeling like someone understood me. I’m not gay but there others feeling and things that he wrote that just felt like he was so on point with where I was in in life.

    • @kamaralzaman369
      @kamaralzaman369 Рік тому

      Omg you found the words. That's what I feel exactly

  • @naff_tm
    @naff_tm Рік тому +270

    *"don't catastrophize hypotheticals"* I think this summarizes everything so beautifully ! thank you for being like a friend or older brother, imparting such sage advice, even after all these years ! I appreciate you so so much 💖

  • @maybeinanotherworld
    @maybeinanotherworld Рік тому +82

    I've been in therapy on and off for about three years and one of the things I found most valuable was my therapist saying "there's a world outside of happiness", it's kinda stuck with me because I feel like I valued being happy so much that anything less than that was distressing, and I didn't really know how to be "just okay" because I was awful at validating my own feelings (still am, from time to time, but we'll get there eventually). It's something I still think about.
    One of my other favourite therapist interactions was when I told my therapist I found doing spreadsheets calming and she responded with "I love that for you but you're a crazy woman"

  • @qass1528
    @qass1528 Рік тому +32

    I came from a religious background, and anything related to mental health meant you have to be purified or u r possessed. Hearing stories like helped me to seek help and get treatment. I never knew what therapy was. So, thank you

    • @malikaoubilla
      @malikaoubilla Рік тому

      I congratulate you for taking this step to help yourself. Good luck

  • @yes7855
    @yes7855 Рік тому +55

    “I am a person experiencing the world.” Somehow this was so powerful! Humanizing indeed :0,❤❤

    • @ConnorFranta
      @ConnorFranta  Рік тому +4

      it's a very relaxing, grounding phrase. i say it all the time :')

  • @procrastinationismyspecial9162
    @procrastinationismyspecial9162 Рік тому +60

    How can I like a video twice? I’m in therapy and it’s so refreshing to hear you talking about this stuff and actually hear that yes, I’m not the only one going through these things!

    • @ConnorFranta
      @ConnorFranta  Рік тому +6

      you're not alone ! sending you all my love ❤

  • @katrinasutton8906
    @katrinasutton8906 Рік тому +3

    Being a client and now being a therapist myself, I always like to think of the art of therapy as a dance and like real magic happens once you find the right moves and become great partners in it and you learn to know when to push, when to pull, when to let go, and when to fall. Therapy is incredible 💜

  • @cameroncloseted9972
    @cameroncloseted9972 Рік тому +8

    All of this is life-changing GOLD. Perhaps the most important thing you discussed was how understanding and implementing these things takes time and practice. People can't just watch this once, think "that's what I should do!" and magically their life is changed. At a minimum you need post-its all over your bathroom mirror to constantly remind yourself about these ideas.

  • @LTMotions
    @LTMotions Рік тому +12

    "be kind to yourself" seems so obvious but when you think of it as if you're talking to a friend or a stranger it completely changes how you think about yourself. i'd never tell my friend they look stupid, or that joke they made was really dumb and everyone probably thinks they're weird, or that they're not good at what they do... so why should i be telling myself that???
    thanks for that one, really changed the way i look at things.

  • @motegadg
    @motegadg Рік тому +141

    This video was actually genuinely very helpful!!! Especially the friend "chapter" thing, i'm personally going through some stuff with that and hearing you say that it's normal and okay meant a lot in a weird way i guess???
    My experience with therapy has been not all too great? But im working on getting a new therapist luckily
    Its just exactly what i needed to hear, so uhhhh, thank you :) your video's are always a bright spot in my day!

    • @ConnorFranta
      @ConnorFranta  Рік тому +21

      happy i could help validate + comfort you! :)

  • @yessismiles
    @yessismiles Рік тому +72

    This is such a comforting video, I've been going to therapy for two years now and I've uncovered more childhood trauma than I ever thought I had, therapy is great and I hope more ppl have a chance to try it! You're the best, connor 💞

    • @ConnorFranta
      @ConnorFranta  Рік тому +4

      sending you so much love, yessi! ❤

  • @day2334
    @day2334 Рік тому +3

    therapist here.... love your thoughts on anger and resentment. I always tell clients that expectations are future resentments... lower your expectations of others.

  • @alleycatgirlxo
    @alleycatgirlxo Рік тому +201

    It’s always a good day when Connor grants us his presence ❤️

  • @annachebet1193
    @annachebet1193 Рік тому +82

    I got therapy and I think it was a great decision. It helped me forgive, heal and grow. I suffered with depression and I believe that therapy helped me overcome it. I've recommended to a few people since then because I believe it really helps. Over 14 million people in the US suffered a depressive episode in 2020. If you're depressed and you're reading this I hope that fact helps you feel less alone and less weird. Take care!

  • @paytons192
    @paytons192 Рік тому +7

    i’ll be honest i haven’t stopped by for a video in a while. glad this one was on my feed. thanks for being one of the most level-headed creators i grew up with, childhood me and current me appreciate you

  • @gunclebryan
    @gunclebryan Рік тому +9

    Love everything about this. As a therapist, this is a lot of what I teach myself. Honestly, most of my personal growth in the last year is from being a therapist and teaching all of these ideas repeatedly, every day. I've been come a lot better at taking my own advice and its worked wonders. I've personally taken up the mantra that "practice makes progress" because "perfect" isn't real (just like thoughts).
    I love that you've been with the same therapist for so long. I have never had a therapist longer than 3 or 4 years, either because they moved or I moved, but I think I've only met one I didn't like. He was a nice older man, but like wouldn't let me talk. He overdid it on the reflection, validation, and advice-giving piece. I was proud to have picked that up on the first meeting so as not to waste a bunch of time.

  • @emiliescorner2620
    @emiliescorner2620 Рік тому +10

    your approach to mental health is so comforting and refreshing! I feel like I'm starting to learn the same lessons, and it is really nice to have this feeling of universality.

    • @ConnorFranta
      @ConnorFranta  Рік тому

      aw im so happy to hear my words resonated with you!

  • @nikola_tesla-b4x
    @nikola_tesla-b4x Рік тому +11

    Freaking love this, it's everything, the way he just expressed all the stuff we've experienced and normalises feeling vulnerable in a world in wich they teach us to be lions

  • @camhutchins03
    @camhutchins03 Рік тому +18

    connor really is my comfort youtuber 😭 been watching him since i was 12 and i just turned 20 this week. This video literally addressed everything i’ve been going through in the last year lmao thank you for this ❤️

    • @m.l.7558
      @m.l.7558 Рік тому

      So true, 20 and overthinking much

  • @okaypearl
    @okaypearl Рік тому +7

    i like videos like these because i can't afford therapy and haven't been in 5 years but it's really valuable to see the lessons and takeaways people get from therapy. thank you connor

  • @lena5551
    @lena5551 Рік тому +24

    i haven't seen the video yet, but based on the title, i have an idea what it's about. all i wanted to say is that you've helped me so much with your videos, books, and just your presence in general. so thank u for that. i love u

    • @ConnorFranta
      @ConnorFranta  Рік тому +12

      this is so sweet of you to say, love you too ❤

    • @johncedarleaf224
      @johncedarleaf224 Рік тому +3

      Here’s an “old guy” who seconds Lena’s comment!

  • @Tildasongs
    @Tildasongs Рік тому +3

    The part about anger and resentment and how it only affects your own mood and not even the person you're angry about made so much sense. Thank you for this 🙏

  • @decoraboy
    @decoraboy Рік тому +6

    Wow Connor, to come back to your channel after years without youtube and see this as your most recent video is so amazing and refreshing and comforting and real. I really appreciate this video. as a queer person myself ive always gravitated toward your vids, i even have drawings of you from when i was younger, that ive turned into collage work now. ive watched this again and again. its the same things i tell myself but it hasnt sunk in yet. im always the therapist friend for other people but i am suffering so much. i feel like i cant forgive the ones who hurt me, its all i think about the hatred it stews in me all day and all night. I don't know how NOT to rot myself from the inside out. I am trying so hard. Ive been going to therapy for years, twice a week. I put so much effort into growth and change and getting better but it feels like Nothing is enough. i go in circles with my therapist. but all of the things you said in this video hit home for me hard, i am so mean to myself. always living in the past and cringing at my mistakes, its just never ending hell in my body and mind. i feel trapped i want out. but im on a path and that path is not easy but i know the more i keep working at it the better it will get. it cant happen in a day, just like a tree cant grow in a day. it felt SO affirming to hear you say all these things. i cant wait for the day where i find more people like you, where i have chosen family and where i can see the way all my hard work has paid off. i can already see so much progress from the years i put in even though i feel so stuck and awful right now. ups and downs. thank you for this video connor you are the best always.

  • @fay5772
    @fay5772 Рік тому +1

    this video feels like a big comforting hug thank you so so much!!

  • @juliasturrus876
    @juliasturrus876 Рік тому +7

    I've just started therapy a few months ago and it's so cool to see where it can lead if only you put the time and work into it

  • @chrisquinlan6527
    @chrisquinlan6527 Рік тому +4

    Been in therapy for years, and just started medicine. Both are irreplaceable. Thankful for all the lessons I've learned.

  • @josephinel2824
    @josephinel2824 Рік тому +7

    I was in therapy all through my youth from elementary school to high school with a brilliant psychiatrist who unfortunately retired when I got to uni (it honestly broke my heart, I really considered her as a friend) and since then I have tried hard to find a new match but still haven’t find a new psychiatrist after 4 years 😢 I miss therapy, I remember how it helped me so much so I’m still hopeful I’ll find a psychiatrist that can help me 🤞🏻

  • @lightpinkds
    @lightpinkds Рік тому +3

    i've been struggling a lot recently, due to a mess of things like relationships and childhood trauma, and i've been in therapy since i was like 14 and i'm 23 now, so about 10 years as well. this video was super helpful in reminding me of things i sometimes just like to forget so i can choose the easier way out and just let myself spiral and suffer lol, you're so right that like, i'll go to therapy and rant and feel so much better and just choose to not apply anything i learned when things get tough again because it's so hard to change the way you think and takes constant practice. so thank u for this❤️

  • @IoanaIrinaM
    @IoanaIrinaM Рік тому +2

    I've just had a revelation watching this. For the past 10 years I've been watching your videos and they kinda have been like a form of therapy (more like a very aware and friendly support but you get the idea). It's weird because now I'm a 20 something year old full with all this existential dread but I remember watching your videos in middle school like it was yesterday. Back then it was pretty rough. It was always about that start of the week, the horrifing Monday. Even so, at the end of the day, however shitty it was, I would come home and know that I can watch Connor's new video, how great! And right then and there I would feel like all was good.
    Reflecting back on everything I find it truly amazing that we've had this opportunity of an online community and support. I didn't even relize the impact it had on my life. All I want to say is that I am deeply grateful.
    Thank you all and especially you Connor and I guess we'll all see each other next Monday ;)

  • @benpollock8881
    @benpollock8881 Рік тому +15

    This video is EXACTLY what I needed today. I am dealing with nearly everything you went over and this video brought me so much comfort. Thank you, Connor, for continuing to be a source of comfort and peace. (And everything gay!)

    • @ConnorFranta
      @ConnorFranta  Рік тому +3

      So so happy this brought you peace, Ben! ❤

  • @anshreadsandrants
    @anshreadsandrants Рік тому +2

    I know you said that this video is not therapy and you’re not a therapist but honestly connor your videos always calm me down. Whenever I feel anxious overwhelmed I just put my favorite videos of you and it is just so therapeutic! Honestly, thank you so much seriously i love you🫶🏻

  • @InnerResearcher
    @InnerResearcher Рік тому +15

    Connor, I have LOVED - and still loved - seeing your evolution. I've been in therapy for 2 years now and it has been the hardest + best thing I've done. Brilliant & spot on video!

  • @lizzybarretto1997
    @lizzybarretto1997 Рік тому +4

    Your videos always seem to pop up at the right time. Been feeling very anxious lately but especially today and this video really made me feel seen! Thank you for your wise and gentle words they are comforting

  • @syaerafelina2469
    @syaerafelina2469 Рік тому +2

    been to therapy for five years and this is making me think the next five is where I'll get my money's worth. so amazing to see you articulate the thoughts and lessons I've been trying to integrate myself. this is a really special (and absolutely helpful) video, thank you so much for this

  • @pixelnickelofficial
    @pixelnickelofficial Рік тому +3

    I said it once and I’ll say it again, Connor Franta is the best person EVER 💕 So real, so kind, so smart, so honest. He’s amazing! 😌 Always here making our days better and a great coffee aesthetic maker too! Don’t even get me started on the baking. Literally, THE best man 👏

  • @robinrodriguez3107
    @robinrodriguez3107 Рік тому +1

    I’ve had a really good experience in therapy. It’s challenging to be vulnerable and I’m still working at being more vulnerable with those around me. The best thing I’ve learned is 1) you can think negative things/have negative thought patterns and alter them with your actions. So, you hate yourself and think you’re the worst, and instead of giving your thoughts attention, you get icecream or do the wordle. 2) if you’re not hurting anyone, it’s not your responsibility to take on the negative feelings they have about your decisions/life. 3) you’re tougher than you think you are. Everything terrible and bad that’s ever happened to you, you’ve survived and gotten through. So if something bad happens to you in the future, you don’t have to worry about the what-ifs now, you have all the tools you need to deal with it.

  • @mkwoodstock
    @mkwoodstock Рік тому +2

    Been learning these things recently because of a combination of meditation and therapy. Connor, you explain the internal experience so well in this video and I resonate a lot. Especially the part where you said that it’s easy to be a victim to circumstances because it makes you feel so much better, rather than picking yourself up and moving on. It’s a hard lesson to learn, but if I’ve learned anything in my psych courses in university or from meditation philosophies, it’s that this tendency is human nature, so we shouldn’t be ashamed of that desire. It’s a mechanism that we have to protect ourselves, just like all of these things. We have to learn how to be kind to ourselves while still holding ourselves accountable. A lot of people give bogus mental health advice on the internet, but this video is the opposite of that, and explains very common psychological flaws ❤️‍🔥

  • @lezlezzin
    @lezlezzin Рік тому +1

    you don't know how much I needed this today. In a very uncertain living situation, temporary and trying to find a job and an apartment in another city. I'm on several different deadlines and feel out of options. All I can do lately is spiral and convince myself that nothing is going to go right, because it feels lately like nothing has. But I know I have to stop those thought patterns. I appreciate your videos like this

  • @MichaelLeeHoward
    @MichaelLeeHoward Рік тому +6

    I think these are such great tips. I think also making peace with your inner child is a key part of getting better mentally. My therapist once said "what would you say your child?" wow that is a tough one to think about regularly but so true

  • @musicObseSSion001
    @musicObseSSion001 Рік тому +4

    Content like this is really important. Thank you for sharing these messages. I really needed to hear them at this moment ❤️

    • @ConnorFranta
      @ConnorFranta  Рік тому +1

      happy to hear it resonated with you!

  • @liasadventure
    @liasadventure Рік тому +4

    Feels like hanging out with an old friend on a lovely afternoon.. after like 10 years of watching, still love the vibe, love the videos! ✨

  • @paolafrattesi5012
    @paolafrattesi5012 Рік тому +1

    Connor, this should be a PSA!! You talk so eloquently and in such a light, approachable way!! You should consider being a counselor yourself (in a way, you kind of already are, even if you don’t jnow it). Thanks for sharing your learnings with us! ❤️

  • @goto6458
    @goto6458 Рік тому +3

    I was in therapy about 2 months when I was 19. I was horribly scared by every person I met but I wanted to be in society. So after this small time I stopped feeling anxiety and start filling Nothing. And I was like - oh that’s how normal works (no), I can quite now. Now I’m 24, I on therapy again, because anxiety back with bulimia and new problems arrived. But the basics (how to live and learn and existing with yourself and world around) I take from first therapy take me huge advantage in live. I think it would be good for every person who finishing the school or something like that

  • @Madisonv13
    @Madisonv13 Рік тому +1

    Thank you for being so inspirational and helpful and using your platform for good.
    I’ve been watching your videos for 10-11 years. From the beginning of highschool all the way until now when I’m in my mid 20s. I just wanted to say thank you for always being there for the community you started.
    I’ve had my own battle with depression and anxiety and it has gotten to some really bad places a couple times.
    I used to go to therapy when my parents paid for it but now I can’t afford it.
    But just having people like you telling people to find community and support each other makes a world of difference
    Thank you for making the change you want to see in the world!
    I love you too. We all do.

  • @J_aech94
    @J_aech94 Рік тому +1

    7:11 Honey - that's me! I resonated with everything you said in that bit. I used to love to ride that wave of sadness cause its easier and comfortable. I just didn't respect or care about myself to want to make a better life cause I found it too difficult at times. I have been at therapy now for about 5 years now, and I am learning more about myself every single session. I realised that I had drowned out my inner voice because of what I would call external forces influencing me and just not having belief in the fact I could create my dream life.
    Therapy is the one thing I can say I am proud of myself for investing in. Its truly changed me as a person.
    Love you too Connor xx Thanks for being vulnerable to us chickpeas

  • @denisechristina708
    @denisechristina708 Рік тому +2

    i've definitely been struggling lately, didn't know i needed this but i did, you honestly teached me more then the 6 years my therapist taught me, so thanks for sharing your wisdom

  • @CG.M
    @CG.M Рік тому +3

    Thank you so much for this Connor! So happy that you use your platform to talk about therapy and mental health. ♥

  • @caitlinmcquade5330
    @caitlinmcquade5330 Рік тому +4

    The medical anxiety/depression one stuck with me to the core, thank you, thank you Connor for covering this ❤

  • @elisazouza
    @elisazouza Рік тому +4

    I needed this for not having a support system and being validated for having mental health by my own family. If I had therapy or more support, I think I would be so much better

  • @jasmine3705
    @jasmine3705 Рік тому +1

    i had my first experience with therapy a few weeks ago and unfortunately it didn’t go well, the therapist didn’t made me feel comfortable enough to open up to her, and that really threw me off.
    but I love everything you said in this video, and I’m now thinking about opening myself to the idea of therapy again, so thank you!
    also, "there's no need to yell fire if you don't see flames" and what you said about "fake thoughts", I really needed to hear that!! 🧡

  • @mariaap286
    @mariaap286 Рік тому

    I have been trying therapy for about 3 years. Took me a while to find one that I could really open myself to and be vulnerable or scared of judgment.
    Something that had a huge impact on me was knowing that feelings are just feelings. They are not bad or good. Its natural to feel jealous or angry or sad and we normally associate those feelings as bad feelings (or at least i did) and that we shouldnt be feeling that way. Its only natural and normal. Its up to us to decide what we do with them.
    Such a good video Connor. Watching you for years and such Confort to see you well

  • @nasianikolova
    @nasianikolova Рік тому +3

    Thanks so much for being so vulnerable in sharing your experience and learnings. I could connect to so much of it! Really pleased this video appeared in my recommended x

  • @emilyl3293
    @emilyl3293 Рік тому +1

    Con, I’ve been watching your videos since 2014 and I’ve never resonated so much to a video. I was nodding along to everything you said because it’s exactly what I’ve learnt in my therapy as someone who also struggles with depression and anxiety. Proud of you for making it through it all!

  • @Wonky1000
    @Wonky1000 Рік тому +1

    I love this video. It has the right message and the right tone. I've been in therapy a few times and found it helpful. If someone is worried about the stigma then I suggest you just say that you want to be a better person and are willing to work on that. Most problems have solutions and having someone to talk to who isn't in your everyday life can be a big help.

  • @Kuhreenuh13
    @Kuhreenuh13 9 місяців тому

    Loved this. I’ve done therapy for a little over 6 months. I feel so much better as a person. I’m really glad I decided to go when I did, or else I’d be in a much harder situation. I went at the perfect time in my life to get help and now have the tools to manage better. All the anxiety and feelings are always there, but they are less heavy. And when bad days happen, they don’t feel like the end of the world. They feel like, ok we got this, this SUCKS a bunch but we can do it. I’ve been so passionate about mental health and just personal growth ❤️

  • @songseakleng
    @songseakleng Рік тому

    I really admire people who have supportive group, system or community. I admit that I don’t have access to those. Being all by yourself alone against the world is scary and exhausting. At this point, I ain’t sure whether I can survive the midlife crisis in the 30s as I’m now so struggling with being left-out, identity-lost, anxiety, emotional disorder and clinical depression.

  • @Po-sd3jd
    @Po-sd3jd Рік тому +1

    thanks for sharing your hard-earned wisdom connor, it's very comforting coming from you. i related especially to the bit about clinging onto sadness and spiraling feeling easier and soothing in a weird way. it feels so hard to get out of. i would love to hear you talk more about your experience with that, it would help many. big hugs!

  • @sheilaramirez6444
    @sheilaramirez6444 Рік тому +1

    This video has been popping up on my feed for a few days now and I finally clicked on it and I’m so glad that I did. Yes yes yes!! Struggling with OCD right now and it is comforting knowing I’m not alone ❣️

  • @phuongong40
    @phuongong40 Рік тому +10

    Connor your energy is beautiful. You're such a special soul

  • @justinebayais7462
    @justinebayais7462 Рік тому

    Ever since I started making videos, overthinking and imagining worse case scenarios started happening more often. This video is a great help.

  • @LisaKokx
    @LisaKokx Рік тому +4

    This was such a wonderful wonderful video, it definitely hit me. Thank you for being so open, it's so lovely to see how therapy helped you.

  • @gracemreyes
    @gracemreyes Рік тому +3

    Hi Connor! I’ve been watching your videos ever since i was 12(i’m 19 now) and you bring such peace and laughter every time you post. I read your books and they are amazing! This video was also amazing and i’m definitely taking note of it all. Keep up the good work, your doing wonderful!❤❤

  • @t_anesthesia
    @t_anesthesia Рік тому

    I’ve been in therapy for 4 months and it’s so groundbreaking, even a slight change matters. And your video is so calming, it helps to feel that I’m not alone in this journey. Thank you!!

  • @jaxm3715
    @jaxm3715 Рік тому +2

    This was super helpful - I wrote all of them down and are sharing with my siblings. Thanks for the chill vibes in the middle of a hectic work day!

  • @anastasiapryputen9832
    @anastasiapryputen9832 Рік тому +6

    what can be better on Monday than a new video from Connor 😭❤️ appreciate you and your work

  • @elven_music
    @elven_music Рік тому

    Very helpful, thank you. Anxiety and overthinking your life is really a downward spiral

  • @alexride242
    @alexride242 Рік тому +1

    i find the most difficult thing about my anxious thoughts is being stuck between wanting to validate my feelings, but also trying not to put the weight of my worries on someone else when the things I've worried about havent even happened. But then if I don't seek reassurance I become a nervous reck. Therapy has been so helpful.

    • @m.l.7558
      @m.l.7558 Рік тому +1

      Happy that it has been helpful! While some anxious thoughts are just stupid like "what if, what if..." , Some of them. come form ignoring stuff and letting it grow and then we are too scared to confront it and then the person explodes. Take care of yourself but don't forget about your instinct and how you are feeling, because it's valid

  • @ChristyStyles17
    @ChristyStyles17 Рік тому +3

    Did i just get a new role model? This video was in my recommended at exactly the right time 💚 I've been struggling with mental health issues for the last 7 years and had around 8 different therapists until now. I could relate to basically everything that you said in this video. Thank you for filming it, my mental health has gotten worse again recently so watching youe video was helpful for me 🙏

    • @ConnorFranta
      @ConnorFranta  Рік тому +1

      This is too sweet. I'm glad you enjoyed it and it resonated with you ❤

  • @GetWellSoonR.E.M.
    @GetWellSoonR.E.M. Рік тому +1

    I’m 25, and I’ve been in therapy in and out for about the same amount of time as you. It was so transformative for me.

  • @whattheheooooo
    @whattheheooooo 4 місяці тому

    Been going for more than 2 years now, having the support definitely helps you go through the hard times!

  • @bicuriousdirtbikeboi2594
    @bicuriousdirtbikeboi2594 Рік тому

    My biggest lesson I’ve learned in my 23 years of life is to let my happiness flow. And what I mean by that is that I tend to cling to the past memories that brought be joy during the best times of my life, and then I compare my current life to those memories and then get upset that they don’t match up.
    BUT here’s the thing. Happiness is a feeling just like anger and sadness, and feelings are not supposed to be forever. It is totally okay for you to feel happy one day and then sad the next. Sometimes you wake up and you’re like “This day is gonna rock! And it’s gonna be awesome”, and some days you wake up and youre like “Man I don’t want to go to work. I feel like shit. Please kill me.” And on bad days like that you have to remind yourself that the best part about bad days is that they fucking end. And you have to remember that just because you were happy yesterday, that doesn’t mean that you have to be today. Some days just suck ass, and you have ti keep the positive attitude of “Today sucks but tomorrow will be better”.

  • @sheensays
    @sheensays Рік тому

    the "don't wash down dessert with guilt" resonates with me SOOO much. what an amazing way to phrase that, i've never heard of it that way!! such a great one that i needed ❤ thought i was the only one too experiencing guilt all my life for simple pleasures or questioning if i really deserved to engage in/have them.

  • @tamakatsui_
    @tamakatsui_ Рік тому +1

    You are an amazing person Connor, i've never seen any other youtuber from your time evolve the way you have. Becoming such an amazing and positive person. You've changed for the best and it shows ! I've been enjoying all these videos from you where you are real and you let yourself be you. Be proud of yourself !

  • @Aya-ev6zw
    @Aya-ev6zw Рік тому +2

    watching your videos truly feels like chatting with a best friend, thank you so much for this ♥︎

  • @marianomoreno6478
    @marianomoreno6478 Рік тому +1

    sometimes you take months to post something and then you post a video that feels so comforting and helpful to that specific point in my life when I needed most. thank you so much!

  • @_Ice.
    @_Ice. Рік тому

    Wow man - I’m so, so grateful you chose to be open and upload this for all of us. I’ve been struggling so hard to move on because my mental/physical health issues have somehow felt “safer” than exploring the rest of life. I’ve never lived without my issues even though theoretically what waits on the other side seems so much nicer. It’s definitely not for lack of trying, I have tried so many times and let myself down just before I turned the corner. I’ve received a Lot of shit for being so stuck in place from everyone in my life too. So, hearing someone else talk about struggling with moving on in a similar way really really fucking helped me today. The way you talked about experiencing life so beautifully really made me feel like I should try again. Thanks for posting ❤️❤️

  • @ameliemueller1032
    @ameliemueller1032 Рік тому +2

    Absolutely in love with this kind of videos. They make me laugh, they make me think, they make me feel comfortable. "quality time with Connor" :)

  • @nicksibley-jett4660
    @nicksibley-jett4660 Рік тому +4

    This was just wonderful to hear and listen to, Connor 😊 thank you!

  • @plutonis6562
    @plutonis6562 Рік тому +2

    Can relate to all of this and am also learning these same lessons in therapy currently. It's tough as heck. I'm glad that you've been getting help and taking care of yourself. It's important. 👍

  • @equilibrium2843
    @equilibrium2843 Рік тому +2

    As someone experiencing major depression, I'd love to see a video with you talking about your experience, if you're comfortable doing so.

  • @unibookworm7
    @unibookworm7 Рік тому +1

    Thanks so much for posting this yesterday Connor! Needed to hear it yesterday and yay to the anxiety couch, thought I was the only one!

  • @charliefual
    @charliefual Рік тому +1

    I felt so seen with all of these things. I’m a 29 y/o guy who finally got the guts to schedule an appointment with a therapist last year, and to start unraveling a lot of stuff in my mind, my life and history, that really was taking a huge toll on my mental and physical health.
    There were three things that really resonated with me:
    1. I was diagnosed with depression and anxiety, which led to pills (clonazepam and antidepressants everyday) it got to a point where my body reached such a resistance that I was taking 2-3 times more pills to have the same effect. People around was concerned, but to me it really was “yeah give me more pills 💊 🥳”. Now I’m really starting to think I’m magnesium deficient.
    2. Intrusive thoughts really killed my mood in a matter of seconds. I cannot say that for the past 5 years I’ve been fully happy, but when I was feeling good, my brain really said “no boy, here are some thoughts”, which led me to lock myself in my room, punish my body by not eating, not showering, cutting all contact with friends, and the most scary one, when being alone in my room with all the blinds closed: suicidal thoughts.
    3. Not remembering things. I most definitely remember the day I got my first anxiety attack, not knowing what was happening and thinking I was having a heart attack. It’s been 5 years since that, and always refused therapy because in a very ignorant way of thinking, I said that that was for crazy people. It took me four years of medicine, depression, and completely instability to reach out for help. There are many things in those four years I don’t remember. That’s something I tell my therapist often, I don’t remember parts of my life, I don’t remember how I was before anxiety came into my life. I still feel it sometimes, that I am missing a chunk of me that was lost in the process.

  • @svenja1989
    @svenja1989 Рік тому +3

    I relate a lot to the part where spiraling into a ball of panic/ depression seems to be the easiest option. Thank you for your comment on that.

  • @ErisRift
    @ErisRift Рік тому

    4:49 👏😌 thank you. I really needed to hear that. I never gone to therapy but know I have a habit of talking to myself in a negative way.

  • @ro__nyc
    @ro__nyc Рік тому

    Great video!!!
    I’ve been in weekly therapy for 4 months now and it has been truly life changing. There are so many “insights” or “conclusions” that sounds soo easy but to get there or to understand them really is work. For anyone out there thinking about it, go for it! And do make sure to match with someone you feel comfortable.

  • @nishitaravuri8814
    @nishitaravuri8814 Рік тому

    I paused the video to make this comment and I never comment, but thank you Connor, for making this video. You won’t get just how much I needed this. Thank you for pointing out that souls hurt when people don’t stay and it feels like another failure. It makes me feel less alone.
    I just got broken up by the boy I thought was the love of my life so I’m doing some pretty heavy spiraling. I hope he realises how kind I’ve been while he figured himself out and left me with more open wounds. Thanks Connor, this is exactly the content I’m here for, real honest talk

  • @anastasia10017
    @anastasia10017 Рік тому +1

    anger/hate is a poison you drink and expect the other person to drop dead.

  • @fragmentedtapestry
    @fragmentedtapestry Рік тому +1

    This video is so comforting and gives me hope for what I could be in the future. Currently I am struggling mentally and with sort of passive self-destructive habits. It is so hard to stop and I just wish mental healthcare is even remotely as accessible in my country as it is in the US. Right now I'm still in university so can't really afford it plus the stigma and like i don't even think that there are professional therapists in the city that I live in, that's how bad it is here. But once I graduate and get a job, number 1 plan is to go to therapy and hopefully heal. It will have wait, but for now I am surviving.

  • @mysticalfooxs
    @mysticalfooxs Рік тому +3

    Your videos are a breath of fresh air, keep doing what you do

  • @bicuriousdirtbikeboi2594
    @bicuriousdirtbikeboi2594 Рік тому

    Choosing to learn how to love other people as well as myself and learning how to let people love me has been the hardest fucking thing I’ve ever done… and it is the best decision I have ever made for myself and it is the best decision I continue to make daily for myself. 💜
    Also I’ve learned that your psyche is not a plate, but it’s a Lego wall. If a plate breaks, it’s broken forever. You can mend it back together but it will never be the same it was. However, if a Lego wall breaks, you can put the pieces back together. Also sometimes when your Lego wall breaks, you can build it back up but you don’t have to build it the same way. You can change it up, and you get to chose the way that you build yourself back up. You are in control over how you respond to things in life.

  • @NathalieKohler
    @NathalieKohler Рік тому +1

    Haven't watched your videos for a while (dunno why) and this one was a blast! Thank you for sharing your experience, *socially anxious hug*! I've been into therapy for a couple of months already and it's been super helpful, hope it can be affordable for more people tho. It's always nice to be reminded that most people are also vulnerable and fragile souls no matter how they look or act.❣

  • @zeynebnv
    @zeynebnv Рік тому +1

    Wow this video is so useful! I didn't know you have gone through what I'm experiencing right now. Even though I've known you for a decade for sure. Thank you for being honest and sharing your story and giving advice. It motivates a lot to see someone who had same issues have passed and became a happy person. Love you 💙

  • @FloridaTesfay
    @FloridaTesfay Рік тому +2

    I was ale to breath a few times, like deep breathes. I didn't know I was tense but watching your video released some tension from my brain and heart, thank you

  • @ItsMePhoebe
    @ItsMePhoebe Рік тому +1

    I really enjoy these chatting videos you do

  • @dayingale3231
    @dayingale3231 Рік тому +1

    I have been in therapy for 1 year. And I am working on all the things you listed. And while I watch your video and nod my head, I realise that in practice it is so difficult