Me!!! It's crazy to think thats the same day I went into labor..... And I found their video's while sitting in the same hospital that she delivered Brynn in.....
I'm so beyond sorry for everything you have been through I can't imagine it but I still feel so much compassion and empathy for you. I hope you are doing as well as you possibly can and I hope you are able to find peace and grow your family in the future
A good family friend of mine had gone through fertility with her husband and had 3 miscarriages and then was blessed with a healthy set of boy-girl twins!!
watching this after watching you learning you're having twins, my heart is bursting with joy for you both, I have watched you since this video and cannot wait to see Emma be a big sister to two little babies. God has truly blessed you even if it didn't seem like it during this awful time xx
I am crying with you. Thank you for being so raw and open. Brynn IS such a beautiful baby, and is blessed to have you and Justin as her parents! ❤️sending so much love to you guys!!!!
I am so sorry that you have had to experience such loss. I too lost babies at 23 weeks and am also an angel momma. Having to leave the hospital and leave your baby behind is one of the worst things in the world. Then having to arrange a funeral. Healing if you can even call it that takes a long long time. My angels were born on 11/26/15. Some days it stings as much as the day it happened. You somehow find a way to continue as impossible as it may sound. Take time to take care of yourself and your husband. Take time to be in your feelings. Cry when needed. And do not let anyone rush your grieving. Thinking of you and your family.
There is someone special who is living a happy life up in heaven and waiting for the day, years from now, when she will be able to say "Welcome home, mommy".
I live in Canada, and we are lucky enough that autopsies and any medical care are covered. And it saddens me so much to see parents like you and your husband go through something so painful and sad, and not even have the chance to try and find out what happened through an autopsy without having to spend so much money. It is unthinkable for me, it just does not add up. I cannot even imagine what you both are going through, and I just want to send a little love to you from where I am. I really hope you both are granted with another little one soon enough that will ease your hearts, and your sweet Brynn will be watching over her, like she is already watching over you two, I truly believe that. xxxx
PS: I wrote a song that you can find on iTunes/Apple Music/Spotify titled "Hope"... if it can help you, that would mean the world to me. Here is the link: itunes.apple.com/ca/album/ml-ep/id1207501414?l=fr
I couldn't help but cry with you while watching this.. Your strength is so admirable. I just wish I could reach through the screen to give you the biggest hug 💖 We've been thinking of you both, as well as your beautiful Brynn, daily. Just so sorry you've had to endure such a devastating loss.. Sending all our love & support, always xxx
No need to apologize for getting emotional. I can't even fathom how difficult this situation must be. I'm at a loss for words and am crying with you. 😔
my heart breaks for you. I experienced a stillbirth with our first daughter also. I was 36 weeks pregnant. Nothing compares to that pain. Going out and trying to find your new normal is so difficult, it feels like at every turn there is a reminder. Give yourself grace, and take it slow. There is no "normal" way to grieve. We lost our daughter 7 years ago. Since then we have had 3 healthy pregnancy, the first 2 are boys and the most recent was another daughter who was actually born on March 7th, the 7th year anniversary of loosing our firstborn daughter. Don't loose hope. praying for you guys!
I found your channel several years ago after the loss of my granddaughter. I'm still a loyal viewer and its amazing to see how far you've come. I just wanted to go back and watch this again.
I'm so sorry for your loss. I'm also a fellow angel mommy. Our stories are very similar. Unless they have been through it, no one truly understands that moment when you are pushing out your child and you're having this internal battle with yourself because part of you is so excited to "meet" your child but the other part of you knows that when they are born it's all over...and you're not ready for it to be over. :(. I think my milk coming in was the worst reminder for me...then my 6 week postpartum check up bc all the other women had babies or pregnant bellies...I tried to just focus on that rainbow. Shopping helped me. I would buy things for our rainbow baby. I just kept praying. I'm so sorry that you are having to go through this now. I remember feeling so frustrated and hopeless...I felt like it was never going to happen for me (and really mad that I had to start all over again bc I was already half way thru my pregnancy). I can tell you tho, as soon as you get your miracle and they put her in your arms...joy returns. My rainbow (Knox) is 17 months old. I stumbled across your vlog tonight on accident but I'm glad I did. Keep your faith...your rainbow is coming :)
Tiffany Little your story truly touched me. Congratulations on your rainbow. May your child bring you all the happiness in the world. I cannot even wrap my mind around the pain you must have gone through but know that my heart goes out to you. Xox
I know that I’m years late, but thank you for sharing your story. I just lost my daughter at 20 1/2 weeks (3 weeks ago) and I admire the strength you showed here as I have been completely devastated. It really helps to see someone remain so positive at what is inarguably one of the hardest moments anyone can go through. I’m happy to see that you’ve been blessed with more children and wish you and your husband the best. ❤️
Watching you here and watching your most recent videos you have come so far! Grief isn’t something that you can get over instantly. I’ve never been in your position and I couldn’t imagine the pain you all went through. I’m proud of how far you and Justin have come, 4 years later with 3 children and you both are literally the light in their eyes. They are so happy! You’re the best parents. Pain changes people, time doesn’t heal it just helps you to deal with pain. Brynn has two amazing parents. She would be so proud of you. Happy belated birthday Brynn x
You are so incredibly strong, your daughter must be so proud of her mommy. I'm sure Brynn will handpick a brother or sister to send to you when you're ready to try again x
This video has been popping up in my suggestions for awhile and I've been avoiding it because I recently had a miscarriage in March and I worried it would be upsetting for me. But I'm glad I watched it. It's helpful hearing stories from others. I found out my baby had no heartbeat at an outside ultrasound center as well, at 19 weeks. I wanted to deliver the baby, but based on my situation I was advised to have a D&E which was done at 20 weeks. The miscarriage was the hardest thing I have ever been through and turned my world upside-down, but with time it has gotten better. I know I'm late on watching your video, but thanks for sharing your story! It's such a taboo and un-talked about topic, and more people need to share their experiences because it's no fun feeling so alone in the situation. Also, congrats on twins! ❤️
I'm a new subscriber, so this is four years later. I know your heart was completely broken after you lost you first daughter. You were so brave to share your story with the world. I also know that you have three beautiful children earthside now. God is so good. I also went through years of infertility(I will spare you the details.) I miscarried at 12wks with my first. Seems so much harder to lose the first baby because all I could think was that maybe that would be my only pregnancy. I did go on to have a singleton and a set of twins(with one fetus miscarried early in the pregnancy.) Dealing with infertility and then loss is the hardest thing I've ever experienced. My prayers were answered, in God's timing, and I was blessed to become a mother.💙
Watching this video breaks my heart all over again. I’m so glad that Emma is here. Seeing the light come back into your eyes with Emma has been nothing short of amazing. You guys deserve Emma so much. I love your family so much. Can’t wait to watch sweet Emma Brynn Grace grow up. I know she’ll grow up loving and knowing who her big sister Brynn is. ❤️
In tears hearing your story! I’m currently 23 weeks pregnant with our first little baby, and I just can’t begin to fathom what you’ve been through. A baby is the biggest miracle God gives, and a loss of that baby is just heartbreaking. While watching this I kept thinking how easily this could have been me & how thankful I am to be pregnant. So sweet that my little baby kept giving me little kicks throughout this video! ♥️ It is so amazing the connection we have with someone we’ve never met, but that’s a mother’s love- so perfect & all consuming! The overwhelming love we have for our baby is just a fraction of the love God has for us! What an amazing thought! 🙌🏼
You are so strong for making this video. I’ve had 3, and 3 live births, all boys, and I’m currently nursing my 5 month old baby son who turned 5 months TODAY, at midnight last night basically, which means we where pregnant together with our baby girl, and baby boy! So we already have a special connection in that sense. So I just had to watch this. And because of this video my little baby boy Wiley has been having sleep regression stuff going on, and also I am a single Mom who has done it all alone, even my pregnancy and labor. So it’s JUST ME. And I needed a little “something” to just remind me of how special this baby is to me. So while watching this video and the one before this, I just picked him up and nursed him the whole time, and kissed his hands, to remind him how much I love him, and what a blessing each day I’m able to even nurse my baby is. Thank you honey, for sharing this story with us. And what a brave, AND HARD thing this must have been for you. I’m a brand new subscriber, so I am now trying to go back and see what I have missed, so forgive me, but I am damn PROUD of you. And you and Justin seem absolutely lovely. XO💕 Oh, and I just LOVE your Baby girls name. I’m Emma, too. 🙃🥰😍☺️
I'm so sorry for your loss. I've never suffered the loss of a child but I have suffered loss. Both of my parents passed away last summer. After the funerals, I went home and barely got out of bed for 2 months. I have busted out crying in public...most recently around Mother's Day. I was in Walmart and walked past the Mother's Day cards. It gets easier with time. All we can do is pray for God's grace and look to the future.
Your recent video of finding out you were pregnant with your fifth baby naturally just came up for me, I am watching this feeling so sad for your loss but so excited for future you. My best friend's baby was stillborn at 41+4 weeks, Jan 2020, I went to the hospital that day to be with her and hold baby, and the pain and heartbreak I saw in my friend and her husband I wouldn't wish on anybody.
I am standing with every person that has prayed for you in the name of Christ that y'all have a beautiful healthy baby as soon as y'all are ready and that your family will grow even after that. In the name of Jesus Christ I pray Amen!
I am very sorry for your loss. I lost my son at 2 months old from SIDS. That was almost 16 years ago and I miss him all the time, but I am so grateful he was a part of my life, even for such a short time. Hold on to the happy memories. They are always in our hearts. Again, I am sorry and send you healing thoughts.
I'm crying watching this:( I had a miscarriage with my first baby and it was extremely hard, I know how hard this is on you and just know you have lots of supports here for you! She's so blessed to have you both of her parents! You both will be in my prayers!💕
emma is now almost one, and you may never see this comment as this video is from a long time ago, but you just seem so much more full of joy now rachelle and i am so happy for you. i can just see the light that emma has brought back to you, and being a momma suits you so well.
My 4th child, 2nd daughter, was born sleeping 19 days ago at 20 weeks and 1 day. This video and all the heart warming comments are really getting me through this tough time. Thank you ❤
I came across your channel today after watching an OKBaby video. You are so brave. I cannot imagine the nightmare you have experienced. You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.
Just came across it last night! I don't have a child but am still obsessed with this couple and channel!!!! Praying my heart out their day will come soon. This couple is what being parents is about.
BSBSPSensGirl88 That's so crazy, because I did too! Hello fellow bug buddy! Her strength and will is amazing. I am so happy that she has gotten blessed with another baby. I pray everything goes well for her.
Just recently found this channel, and watching this had me in tears...I’ve been there mama, I had two stillborn (36wks and 38.5 wks) and still the hardest thing I’ve ever been thru. Always praying for you! 💓
I just randomly came across this video.... my heart goes out to you and your husband. May 17th 2015 I went through having to give birth to a stillborn baby girl. It's the worst thing in the entire world. I have a little boy who is now 8 so I know the joy you get after giving birth and to have to go through labor and all that and not be able to have that baby in your arms and see/kiss/hold/hug her every day for the rest of your life is terrible. There will forever be a part of your heart that is broken. I pray that you guys get the chance to get pregnant again and have a healthy baby. I now have another little girl who just was born may 20th of this year ... just a little over 2 years later... and not that anyone could ever replace the daughter I lost 2 years ago but having gone through an entire pregnancy with no problems and now having a healthy perfect baby has definitely helped. I feel like the baby I lost sent her to me and it's like having a piece of her with me always. Time 100% helps but I really truly hope you guys have all the best luck in your journey forward. You forever have a beautiful angel looking over you guys 💕
As a new ftm and so many many problems during my pregnancy this absolutely broke my heart. You are so strong! Your baby girl will always be with you and even though she's grown her angel wings don't forget you will always be a mum and dad! She was loved and there is nothing you could have done. There is absolutely nothing wrong with not being okay, take the time you need to grief 💗 It's not going to get better, but it will get easier to cope. Talking helps. 💖💖
It is always darkest before the dawn. You are both wonderful people and I am wishing you strength and peace in this tough time. Don't lose hope for the future, you will get your earth baby soon. xo
wow not to take away from any of the raw feelings in this video and precious Brynn but to see your 3 children now is so incredible. you have four beautiful children, 3 on earth and 1 in Heaven. I feel so blessed to see the growth of your family. thank you for sharing your amazing journey.
I went into labor and gave natural birth to my beautiful daughter Madison Rey Vasquez at 20 weeks on May 23rd, 2019. They placed her in my arms, she took one breathe and moved her arm towards me and passed away. It was the hardest and the most painful day of my life, physically, emotionally, and mentally. I still wake up each morning thinking she is still in my tummy, only to realize she is not. It's been the hardest days of my and my fiance's lives. But your videos have given me some hope and made me feel less alone and empty inside. I suffer from an incompetent cervix. I just wanted to take the time to say I'm so very sorry for you loss and thank you for sharing your story and helping provide a ray of light for me in these darkest of times. You have helped me more than you will ever know. ♥️
Watching this while Emma is 2 months old. Still breaks my heart every time I watch it. Watching the life come back into your eyes after so much heartbreak and sadness is the best thing in the world. I love the Swannies so much and I can’t wait for your family to grow even more 💕💕
I came back to this today. Because this was the first video I ever watched. My heart is filled with joy and love!! To see you become such an amazing mama to Emma!! And your twin bows oh my!!! God is so good!!! You are amazing. & wish you the best babygirl!!! 🤍
Losing a baby never stops hurting and I'm so sorry. You are so so so sooo strong and I know she is so proud of her mommy's strength. I am just blown away with your strength! Lots of hugs from a navy spouse who recently lost a baby as well. I was not as far as you, and I am again so blown away by your strength.❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
I am pregnant with my first child and I don't think I could have empathized to this degree until now. you are SO strong to be taking all this head on and discussing everything on your channel. I truly hope you go on to have a healthy pregnancy. no matter what you ARE a mother, and yes, HAVE a daughter. I'm sure she loved you just as much as you loved her. I'm also glad you and your husband are such comforts to one another. again- strong people :) I'm a new subscriber and look forward to seeing what your future holds
You are so strong and just think in less than a week you will have your little miracle baby Emma in your hands. Brynn will always be watching and protecting her wonderful parents and her little sister from above. Sending all love and support.
This was the first video that I watched of this family. You look so happier now with your amazing and growing family. Since this video I always watch every single one and it's such a blessing to see your baby's grow and how amazing this family is.
So sorry that you had to experience such a loss. I too lost my baby boy at 17 weeks on January 16th. I'm 19 with a beautiful 2 year old boy and when my husband and I decided we wanted to expand our family, we were blessed with our angel. Sadly we only got 4 months with him but I cherish those 4 months so so much. We don't know the cause of our miscarriage but our doctor believes my body just went in to preterm labor. It has been the most traumatic thing I've experienced. Went through labor at home without knowing I was in labor and by the time I got to the hospital he was ready to be born. He lived for an hour but sadly passed away in my arms. I'm not sure why God picked me to be an angel mom but at the end of the day I'm grateful. Through all the pain and tears I am thankful to say I have a guardian angel looking over our family. I pray for you and your husband as you embark on a journey of healing. I'm blessed to say I'm currently 12 weeks pregnant with our rainbow baby and I wish nothing but the best for your family in the future. Know that there's a rainbow of hope at the end of every storm
New subscriber. I cried with you. I wanted to say something, but I know words cannot heal a broken heart. Honestly, I just want to sit with you and hug you. You're a strong beautiful woman and I know your daughter is just smiling down at you! I am praying hard for you and your family. May God bless you ❤️
I’m so sorry for your loss, I also went through a similar experience. It was truly traumatic. About 3 weeks ago, I was experiencing cramps, but didn’t think much of it, later when they didn’t go away I got worried and called the nurse line, who told me it was abdominal ligament cramps and not to worry, but when the cramps got too painful I checked into the ER, turns out it was actually contractions, I got admitted to the hospital and found out I was already 1 1/2 inch dilated. At that point there was nothing they could do, since my body kept contracting. I gave birth to my son at 20 weeks and 6 days at 2:50 am, he was alive for 2 hours. He was my first child. I felt so betrayed by my body. Most of all, cheated out of my motherhood. It’s been tough but I find comfort hearing other mother’s story, it helps me cope with the fact that I’m not alone and miscarriages happen for no apparent reasons. Thank you for sharing your story. I hope you and I both get out rainbow babies.
Thank you for sharing your story, it's so difficult to go through this all alone but knowing that there's so many women and stories helps with the healing process. I miscarried exactly a month after you did at 12 weeks and it was the most traumatic and saddest thing I've ever been through. It's been almost three months and I'm still struggling. Thinking of you, sending all my love and hoping you will get to hold your rainbow baby girl soon! ❤️
Sorry to hear about Brynn. What helped me after my daughter Isley passed was to make a memory box. Also I joined the MSIL group on Baby Center and met an amazing group of women who have gone through loss and are at different stages in their loss journey and when you are ready to try again they even have a TTC board. I know all too well how you feel. Hugs.
I know how this feels and please don't ever apologize for crying over baby Brynn. I went through almost the exact same thing this February and it really is traumatic. I hope your journey is filled with immense love and support. ❤️❤️
Sorry to hear about about Brynn heart breaking hearing poor mom taiking about not hearing brynn heart beat so sad For mom and dad and all the family and friends
My heart goes out to you on the loss of your sweet baby girl Brynn. In 1989 I lost my first pregnancy at 25 weeks. I went in for an ultrasound at 20 weeks because my doctor thought I might be having twins since I was measuring at 34 weeks in size. During the ultrasound, the tech was showing us the heartbeat, and the baby's hands and feet, but when she got to the head, she said the machine wasn't working right and I needed to go upstairs to see the head of the OB/GYN dept. I didn't get too nervous until that doctor did another ultrasound and told us our son had a neural tube defect, anencephaly, and that his brain and skull had not formed and there was nothing we could do except deliver our son as soon as possible. My body was compensating and making extra amniotic fluid to cushion our son in utero, which is why I was measuring so far ahead. We had the choice to continue the pregnancy to the end, but at the rate my amniotic fluid was growing, my doctor recommended ending the pregnancy since all the extra fluid was putting my health at risk. By the time I delivered my son at 25 weeks, I was measuring 40 weeks, and the extra fluid was putting undo stress on my body. Labor was induced and I had to go through 8 hours of back labor before delivering my son Ryan. He was perfect in every way, except for the neural tube defect. He weighed 1lb 2oz and was 12 inches long. It has been 28 years since I lost him. I did go on to have 3 healthy children. I know your Brynn will be watching over you and will send you the perfect little one when the time is right. Take time to grieve and heal, and when the time is right, you will get another chance to have a baby. Sending prayers and love your way from Wisconsin, from a retired military family.
As a loss Mom, with a few words of wisdom, communicate with each other. Men and women grieve so much differently. If your husband seems quieter, or different, it's his way of grieving or coping. My biggest fear was that my husband and I would not get thru our loss. Yet nine years later...we are stronger than ever!
I'm so proud of you for sharing your story. You're so brave. Stillborns aren't talked about enough in this society and all the grieving is done behind closed doors. Thank you for sharing.
I feel every emotion you are feeling. i lost my baby 3/24/2017. my beautiful baby boy Charlie Cruz. you go from being so excited to welcome your baby to the devastating loss. my baby was a day old before i lost him. we were completely devastated. i hid in my house for 6 weeks and could not face anybody except my family. i feel empty and lost and every day i feel completely different. i try and keep it together but sometimes i fall apart. youre a beautiful soul and your baby is beautiful ❤️ love from san diego.
I had a similar experience, during the ultrasound to make sure none of the baby or placenta was still in me. I asked the nurse if she thought it would happen to me again, she looked at me and said, I can't tell u for sure, but I don't think this will happen again, and that she thought I'd have a healthy pregnancy the next time I get pregnant, and I wasn't sure I'd get pregnant again. I did, and I had some health issues with bleeding and pre term labor. I did go on to have a healthy baby. and I've never been pregnant again. God knew. he knew what I could and couldn't handle. my son is 13 now, and sometimes I wish he had a sibling, but he does, up in Heaven, I can't wait to meet that baby someday. I believe you will have a healthy baby, I'm sure of it, and if u only have one living child, you will be more blessed than you ever thought possible, praying for everyone's comfort. the time will come when u hold your next baby earth side.
I am so sorry you know the loss of a child. The story of the birth of your daughter is beautiful and you will always keep those precious moments with her close to your heart. I lost my first born son Lucas in April 2017 after a short week with him in the NICU. He was born with a genetic disorder we had no idea we were carriers for. Seeing you cry just brought back all those feelings. I hurt for you. I know all to well how it feels to have your world shattered. You said you’re hopeful, that is the best way to put it. I think the only thing that has gotten me this far is hope, staying hopeful. Thank you for sharing your daughters story ❤️
My Mom had a miscarriage with her first baby 30+ years ago after she and my dad first got married and it absolutely devastated her. She said she’d always wanted children and that losing the baby left her with a grief so deep that she felt hollow. So I’m so incredibly sorry that you had to go through that, too. Miscarrying is something no woman should have to endure, and hearing your story just solidifies that belief. The funny thing is, my Mom says that she always felt like my older sister (her firstborn child) was the soul of the baby she lost- like God just put it into a new body & gave it back to her. She could never explain it, it was just something she felt deeply. And whether or not it’s the same case with you, Brynn will ALWAYS be watching over you and loving you and looking out for you. She’s your angel, and she’s your blessing. I hope and pray that you give birth to a healthy, happy little baby who will fill your heart to the brim with happiness. Just don’t lose hope, Rachelle, no matter what. I feel from the bottom of my heart that everything will turn out alright for you. I pray for you everyday! Sending you lots of love & light!
Wow. As a new mum I couldn't even begin to fathom your pain. I am new to your channel and I pray and hope one day your tears will turn into laughter and you'll have happily squealing little children running around your house. I cried so hard and I honestly never comment on anything but this touched me so much. I admire your strength and positive outlook. Know that your beautiful little girl knows that she is loved and also that she will never be forgotten. Know that one day you WILL see your children grow and prosper and that you shall see their children too! I wish I could reach through the screen and hug you. Sending my love all the way from Germany. A thousand kisses
I just came across your blog, and I too am going through IVF. I could not do a fresh transfer in April because I was over stimuliated, but we are preparing for a frozen one in June. I too am blogging and writing about my experience. My husband and I have had a couple of miscarriages previously, and did regular feriltiy treatments years before. I understand your pain as I have lost my twins a while back. I am so sorry for your loss. It is never easy, but my advice is dont forget her, talk to people about you experience, and take it one day at a time. I still get emotional till this day, but know my babies are in a good place.
I am so sorry for your loss, I am crying with you. You are so strong to be able to share your story. My prayers are with you, Justin and Brynn. I am graduating soon to be a labor and delivery nurse and your story helped me to see how truly difficult it is to go through a still birth and I hope I can be there to support families that go through this. ❤️❤️
I'm currently looking into going to school to become an ultrasound tech and I always knew that as much good news as you tell people there's also going to be bad news and after watching this video it's made me realize that I have some mental growing to do and some strengthening to do before I go into that field of work. I'm really sensitive and easy to cry and I don't want to stress out a mother by delivering bad news in a bad way I know that was not your intention of this video but I just wanted to let you know that it made me think. I know that that wasn't your full intention with this video but I just want to thank you for being so raw and vulnerable and helping out other women that might be going through what you went through I'm watching your pregnancy Journey with baby number three right now and I just wanted to get to know you guys a little bit better so I came to this video to understand a little bit about your past
I share your pain, I had my baby girl Rubi also stillborn on May 9, 2017 just a few days before yours and everything you said I felt and now is been two months and I'm starting to smile again. I pray to God for your rainbow baby and as well for mine
I am so sorry you have to experience this pain. I lost my little boy at 18 weeks, it is by far the worst pain I have ever felt, no parent should ever have to feel the pain of losing their child. She is absolutely beautiful! Many prayers to you and your family.
My heart is broken for you and Justin I am crying for the both of you . I am 15 weeks pregnant and can't imagine what your feeling. I pray you get that beautiful baby on earth.
Your story is really helping me...I lost my son June 10, 2017 at 20 weeks. My husband and I were devastated and I still struggle with him not being here with us but I know he is in heaven and is our angel watching over us. You and your husband are giving me hope because we also have been trying and have not been successful and I felt myself getting depressed all over again. I know exactly how you feel and it’s a rough situation to deal with but I thank you for your courage in sharing
Im so sorry for your loss. I too am a fellow angel mommy. My first baby was stillborn at 26 weeks and like you was also a girl, I named her Brianna. You are definitely in my prayers and just know that god will bless you with another child or 2 or 3 ☺. 2 years after I lost my first baby god blessed me with my first son and 6 months after he was born i got pregnant with my second son. I now have a healthy 11 year old and 10 year old. Stay strong love! ❤❤❤
I stumbled across your channel randomly early on during my pregnancy for my daughter. I have spent the past 8 months or so following you through your pregnancy. Your story of Brynn broke my heart. On Friday, July 20th, 2018... the day before my due date for my daughter Layla, your story became my story too. I gave birth to my angel baby on Sunday, July 22nd 2018. I truly believe I found your channel when I did for a reason, to give me hope and faith and to show me I’m not alone in this horribly unfair tragedy . ❤️❤️❤️
Watching this right after you’ve had the twins and I just want to hug you. You are so incredibly strong and I wish I could tell the girl in this video all that is to come❤️
Coming back and seeing these videos hurt my heart for you. Being pregnant I cant help but watch things like these and just feel grateful but also worry a little cuz its still so early. Anyways, enough of that. I didnt realize how much younger u look here 💕 i feel like u have came sooooo far 😍 and seeing where u are now just ugh, girl im so happy for u and justin and seeing emma walking around and knowing shes about to become a big sister to two little babies... i cant. I am so excited and happy for u
It wasn't until now, after you beautiful twin boys were born the other day, that I could bring myself to watch this one. How much you've been through, dear friends. And how deserving you are of the blessings that have come into your lives since this most excruciating time. God Bless!
I have been wanting to hug you kiss your head through this video even though I don't know you. I pray that you feel God's arms around you now and feel your beautiful Brynn with you always and every day. You are a brave and beautiful soul and I will be praying that you will know the joy of bringing your child home to raise; that child and Brynn will be so blessed to have you and Justin as their momma and daddy.
This is my first time watching this couple and I found out that they lost this child which is so sad . But they had twins I’m so glad for you both. God has blessed you!!!
Oh my gosh this video popped up after I watched your birth story! I'm so happy you have your little miracle baby Emma now ❤️ so crazy how much things can change in such a short period of time. Could not be happier for you guys!
Thank you for sharing 💜 I recently lost my baby girl Hannah, she was stillborn at 24 weeks. I hadn’t felt movement for a few days and had written it off as normal as I had an anterior placenta and thought she wasn’t old enough to distinguish a complete movement pattern. I got a Doppler to reassure myself and after not finding her heartbeat went to the emergency where they confirmed she’d passed. Delivering her and having to leave the hospital empty handed is the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do... I have found a lot of comfort in finding similar stories. It’s hard knowing I’ll never have an answer as to why I lost her but it’s true that there is such an output of love from family and an amazing community of women who understand the pain and can offer support to one another 💜💜
Ugh I’ve been keeping up with all the women who struggled with infertility and loss for awhile now, and now all of them have babies now ❤️ my heart is so happy. Thinking of all you ❤️
Oh Hun I'm so so sorry 😪 My sister in law also lost 2 baby girls at 20 weeks, 2 different pregnancies, and till this day they couldn't find out what went wrong, but after a couple of years she was just blessed with another baby girl who is 7 weeks old now. Remain hopeful and positive that one day soon you will hold your baby in your arms soon. Sending you and Justin lots of love and hugs ❤️
I admire the way you talk about your daughter. You will always be her mommy and she will always be your daughter. I can't imagine what you're going through but you are a strong woman to talk about it. Sending much love your way
Brynn is such a beautiful name. It suits her ❤️ I'm so sorry for your loss. She will always be your first daughter ❤️ sending so much luck and love to you guys
My heart ached for you as I watched you tell your story. I too have experienced that moment when you look at the screen and don't see a heart beat. Hearing you talk about it took me back to that moment and the moments that followed. I've been able to move on and find hope again, but it still pains me to think of that time. I hope that you have been able to find some measure of peace after such a difficult experience.
Oh my heart is in pieces for you. There are just no words. I lost a daughter to a NTD at around 18 weeks and that delivery is the saddest thing that has ever happened in my life. I'm so glad you got to spend some time with her. There is hope, I have two healthy little children now and I remember those moments where that seemed impossible. I will be praying for the two of you and hope that your hearts can be healed
We lost our son Jaxon at 36 weeks. It was a shock to say the least. The hardest part is we have no idea why he passed.... he just did.... It was a perfect pregnancy up until that point. Anyways I don't want to ramble too long.... I know that lots of people experience the same thing.
This video just popped up on my feed and I’m so sorry you had to go through this. Everything happens for a reason, sometimes we don’t know why because it doesn’t make any sense but know your baby is with God and is truly loved. I know you just had your baby and I’m so eternally grateful and happy for you and Justin. You deserve so much happiness and I’m extremely grateful to be able to watch your videos and watch your family grow. ❤️
Hi Rachelle sweetie, My heart hurts for you I can only imagine what you going through hugs to you and Justin, this is really just so sad I'm was wondering if you were going to try again, I feel so happy to hear that your not giving up your a real trouper! Please keep vlogging so we can follow your journey, Stay strong sweetie god loves you and he dose have a plan just have faith your going to have a baby keep that in your thoughts ok? You take care of your self and all of us are here for you we dont physically know each other but we are friends and we care very much, love from your viewer Marilyn...
It's really awesome of you for being so open about your experience, I can only imagine how hard it must be to vlog stuff like this but you must be helping so many people. Sending love your way, you will make an amazing mom one day xoxo
I feel your pain, I lost my daughter last month at 36 weeks aswell, her funeral is next week, we are still waiting for the post mortem results. It’s the worst thing I’ve ever had to go through. And I feel sorry for anyone who’s experienced it to, I wouldn’t wish it on my worst enemy. My body is still healing and I also find it super hard to go out, baby items in the shops are the hardest thing to look at. I was high risk both pregnancie to. I am so sorry for your loss. X
I lost a baby girl at 39weeks, 8 years ago, to this day I still think of her and I can't help but be drawn to kids that would be her age. All I can say is take your time grieving but know it does get better! Stay strong momma.
Im here rewatching this video! It’s so incredible sad that you didn’t get to raise your beautiful girl! Im so sorry this happened to you guys. Its beautiful that you are so happy right now, with your sweet girl emma. I wish you all the happines you can get. I love u
Who’s here watching after the twins were born? I knew god would bless Rachelle and Justin with more angels. They are such a beautiful family.
Me!!! It's crazy to think thats the same day I went into labor..... And I found their video's while sitting in the same hospital that she delivered Brynn in.....
Katie Christian me too! So happy for them!
i am and bless this beautiful family i hope the best for them
Me... sometimes I can't believe how far they've come xx
Wait what happened? I just found this Chanel
something tells me she’s gonna have twins next. idk why, but God is gonna bless her so much.
Crystal Jackson that would be a beautiful gift
I'm so beyond sorry for everything you have been through I can't imagine it but I still feel so much compassion and empathy for you. I hope you are doing as well as you possibly can and I hope you are able to find peace and grow your family in the future
Crystal Jackson Not a gift from God, but from Brynn 💜
A good family friend of mine had gone through fertility with her husband and had 3 miscarriages and then was blessed with a healthy set of boy-girl twins!!
Courtney Courteau uh. No. It would be from God love.
watching this after watching you learning you're having twins, my heart is bursting with joy for you both, I have watched you since this video and cannot wait to see Emma be a big sister to two little babies. God has truly blessed you even if it didn't seem like it during this awful time xx
Same I just came from that video!
Christine D I just posted the same thing!!! Woo Hoo
Same
Amen
I wish i could tell you then, whats happening now! Beautiful Emma And your darling twin boys! You made it through and youre stronger than ever now!
God is good!!!
I am crying with you. Thank you for being so raw and open. Brynn IS such a beautiful baby, and is blessed to have you and Justin as her parents! ❤️sending so much love to you guys!!!!
Ashley Adkins, RN. that right
I am so sorry that you have had to experience such loss. I too lost babies at 23 weeks and am also an angel momma. Having to leave the hospital and leave your baby behind is one of the worst things in the world. Then having to arrange a funeral. Healing if you can even call it that takes a long long time. My angels were born on 11/26/15. Some days it stings as much as the day it happened. You somehow find a way to continue as impossible as it may sound. Take time to take care of yourself and your husband. Take time to be in your feelings. Cry when needed. And do not let anyone rush your grieving. Thinking of you and your family.
So very sorry. God bless you both. RIP lil baby.
Who’s here after she found out she was pregnant naturally?! 🥰 God is so good!! It’s insane how far this family has come and more blessings to come! ❤️
Me!!! I cried so hard when I saw the announcement video before I even watched it
And precious wee Faye is here ❤️🙏❤️
Me
There is someone special who is living a happy life up in heaven and waiting for the day, years from now, when she will be able to say "Welcome home, mommy".
actressbrookesingleton well this made me cry harder than I expected
My eyes filled up with tears reading this ❤️
😭😭😍
I’m watching this after she just had her fifth baby and I’m so happy for them 🥺💕
I live in Canada, and we are lucky enough that autopsies and any medical care are covered. And it saddens me so much to see parents like you and your husband go through something so painful and sad, and not even have the chance to try and find out what happened through an autopsy without having to spend so much money. It is unthinkable for me, it just does not add up. I cannot even imagine what you both are going through, and I just want to send a little love to you from where I am. I really hope you both are granted with another little one soon enough that will ease your hearts, and your sweet Brynn will be watching over her, like she is already watching over you two, I truly believe that. xxxx
PS: I wrote a song that you can find on iTunes/Apple Music/Spotify titled "Hope"... if it can help you, that would mean the world to me. Here is the link: itunes.apple.com/ca/album/ml-ep/id1207501414?l=fr
I couldn't help but cry with you while watching this.. Your strength is so admirable. I just wish I could reach through the screen to give you the biggest hug 💖 We've been thinking of you both, as well as your beautiful Brynn, daily. Just so sorry you've had to endure such a devastating loss.. Sending all our love & support, always xxx
No need to apologize for getting emotional. I can't even fathom how difficult this situation must be. I'm at a loss for words and am crying with you. 😔
my heart breaks for you. I experienced a stillbirth with our first daughter also. I was 36 weeks pregnant. Nothing compares to that pain. Going out and trying to find your new normal is so difficult, it feels like at every turn there is a reminder. Give yourself grace, and take it slow. There is no "normal" way to grieve.
We lost our daughter 7 years ago. Since then we have had 3 healthy pregnancy, the first 2 are boys and the most recent was another daughter who was actually born on March 7th, the 7th year anniversary of loosing our firstborn daughter. Don't loose hope. praying for you guys!
Hannah Bishop that's incredible, that your daughter was born on your first daughters 7th year anniversary, she was sending you a sign from above x❤️❤️
Sad too
I found your channel several years ago after the loss of my granddaughter. I'm still a loyal viewer and its amazing to see how far you've come. I just wanted to go back and watch this again.
I'm so sorry for your loss. I'm also a fellow angel mommy. Our stories are very similar. Unless they have been through it, no one truly understands that moment when you are pushing out your child and you're having this internal battle with yourself because part of you is so excited to "meet" your child but the other part of you knows that when they are born it's all over...and you're not ready for it to be over. :(. I think my milk coming in was the worst reminder for me...then my 6 week postpartum check up bc all the other women had babies or pregnant bellies...I tried to just focus on that rainbow. Shopping helped me. I would buy things for our rainbow baby. I just kept praying. I'm so sorry that you are having to go through this now. I remember feeling so frustrated and hopeless...I felt like it was never going to happen for me (and really mad that I had to start all over again bc I was already half way thru my pregnancy). I can tell you tho, as soon as you get your miracle and they put her in your arms...joy returns. My rainbow (Knox) is 17 months old. I stumbled across your vlog tonight on accident but I'm glad I did. Keep your faith...your rainbow is coming :)
Tiffany Little your story truly touched me. Congratulations on your rainbow. May your child bring you all the happiness in the world. I cannot even wrap my mind around the pain you must have gone through but know that my heart goes out to you. Xox
Tiffany Little no
Alexandra Boky thank you
Tiffany Little that was so beautiful
Bless you for sharing this, Tiffany Little. I'm so glad you got your rainbow baby!🌈👶💙
If only you knew what the future holds ❤️❤️❤️
Yep 3 healthy kids ♥️❤♥️❤
@@lss74 n a natural pregnancy now what a blessing
Don’t you dare apologize for being upset when you talk about your lost babygirl. One day, you’ll all be together again. You’re so strong ❤️
I know that I’m years late, but thank you for sharing your story. I just lost my daughter at 20 1/2 weeks (3 weeks ago) and I admire the strength you showed here as I have been completely devastated. It really helps to see someone remain so positive at what is inarguably one of the hardest moments anyone can go through. I’m happy to see that you’ve been blessed with more children and wish you and your husband the best. ❤️
I am so sorry ❤️
So sorry!
Watching you here and watching your most recent videos you have come so far! Grief isn’t something that you can get over instantly. I’ve never been in your position and I couldn’t imagine the pain you all went through. I’m proud of how far you and Justin have come, 4 years later with 3 children and you both are literally the light in their eyes. They are so happy! You’re the best parents. Pain changes people, time doesn’t heal it just helps you to deal with pain. Brynn has two amazing parents. She would be so proud of you. Happy belated birthday Brynn x
You are so incredibly strong, your daughter must be so proud of her mommy. I'm sure Brynn will handpick a brother or sister to send to you when you're ready to try again x
She did. Beautiful baby sister Emma xxx
@@mandyjackson6894 And now two little brothers, Reuben and Asher 😭😭❤
@@Libz yes! 2 beautiful girls and 2 beautiful boys :)
This video has been popping up in my suggestions for awhile and I've been avoiding it because I recently had a miscarriage in March and I worried it would be upsetting for me. But I'm glad I watched it. It's helpful hearing stories from others. I found out my baby had no heartbeat at an outside ultrasound center as well, at 19 weeks. I wanted to deliver the baby, but based on my situation I was advised to have a D&E which was done at 20 weeks. The miscarriage was the hardest thing I have ever been through and turned my world upside-down, but with time it has gotten better. I know I'm late on watching your video, but thanks for sharing your story! It's such a taboo and un-talked about topic, and more people need to share their experiences because it's no fun feeling so alone in the situation. Also, congrats on twins! ❤️
I'm a new subscriber, so this is four years later. I know your heart was completely broken after you lost you first daughter. You were so brave to share your story with the world. I also know that you have three beautiful children earthside now. God is so good. I also went through years of infertility(I will spare you the details.) I miscarried at 12wks with my first. Seems so much harder to lose the first baby because all I could think was that maybe that would be my only pregnancy. I did go on to have a singleton and a set of twins(with one fetus miscarried early in the pregnancy.) Dealing with infertility and then loss is the hardest thing I've ever experienced. My prayers were answered, in God's timing, and I was blessed to become a mother.💙
Watching this video breaks my heart all over again. I’m so glad that Emma is here. Seeing the light come back into your eyes with Emma has been nothing short of amazing. You guys deserve Emma so much. I love your family so much. Can’t wait to watch sweet Emma Brynn Grace grow up. I know she’ll grow up loving and knowing who her big sister Brynn is. ❤️
In tears hearing your story! I’m currently 23 weeks pregnant with our first little baby, and I just can’t begin to fathom what you’ve been through. A baby is the biggest miracle God gives, and a loss of that baby is just heartbreaking. While watching this I kept thinking how easily this could have been me & how thankful I am to be pregnant. So sweet that my little baby kept giving me little kicks throughout this video! ♥️ It is so amazing the connection we have with someone we’ve never met, but that’s a mother’s love- so perfect & all consuming! The overwhelming love we have for our baby is just a fraction of the love God has for us! What an amazing thought! 🙌🏼
It's April 2020 and they have a toddler Emma and newborn twin boys. Bless them all xxx
You are so strong for making this video. I’ve had 3, and 3 live births, all boys, and I’m currently nursing my 5 month old baby son who turned 5 months TODAY, at midnight last night basically, which means we where pregnant together with our baby girl, and baby boy! So we already have a special connection in that sense. So I just had to watch this. And because of this video my little baby boy Wiley has been having sleep regression stuff going on, and also I am a single Mom who has done it all alone, even my pregnancy and labor. So it’s JUST ME. And I needed a little “something” to just remind me of how special this baby is to me. So while watching this video and the one before this, I just picked him up and nursed him the whole time, and kissed his hands, to remind him how much I love him, and what a blessing each day I’m able to even nurse my baby is. Thank you honey, for sharing this story with us. And what a brave, AND HARD thing this must have been for you. I’m a brand new subscriber, so I am now trying to go back and see what I have missed, so forgive me, but I am damn PROUD of you. And you and Justin seem absolutely lovely. XO💕
Oh, and I just LOVE your Baby girls name. I’m Emma, too. 🙃🥰😍☺️
I'm so sorry for your loss. I've never suffered the loss of a child but I have suffered loss. Both of my parents passed away last summer. After the funerals, I went home and barely got out of bed for 2 months. I have busted out crying in public...most recently around Mother's Day. I was in Walmart and walked past the Mother's Day cards. It gets easier with time. All we can do is pray for God's grace and look to the future.
I came across your vlog and am crying with you. I'm so sorry for your loss and pray for God's peace and comfort for both you and your husband.
Your recent video of finding out you were pregnant with your fifth baby naturally just came up for me, I am watching this feeling so sad for your loss but so excited for future you.
My best friend's baby was stillborn at 41+4 weeks, Jan 2020, I went to the hospital that day to be with her and hold baby, and the pain and heartbreak I saw in my friend and her husband I wouldn't wish on anybody.
I am standing with every person that has prayed for you in the name of Christ that y'all have a beautiful healthy baby as soon as y'all are ready and that your family will grow even after that. In the name of Jesus Christ I pray Amen!
Amen!!!
Racheal Lewis y
Amen 🙏🏽
Racheal Lewis amen🙏🏽🙏🏽
Amen
I am very sorry for your loss. I lost my son at 2 months old from SIDS. That was almost 16 years ago and I miss him all the time, but I am so grateful he was a part of my life, even for such a short time. Hold on to the happy memories. They are always in our hearts. Again, I am sorry and send you healing thoughts.
12-25-92 my twin daughters were born sleeping. Stacey and Stella. Much love sweetie.
I'm crying watching this:( I had a miscarriage with my first baby and it was extremely hard, I know how hard this is on you and just know you have lots of supports here for you! She's so blessed to have you both of her parents! You both will be in my prayers!💕
emma is now almost one, and you may never see this comment as this video is from a long time ago, but you just seem so much more full of joy now rachelle and i am so happy for you. i can just see the light that emma has brought back to you, and being a momma suits you so well.
My 4th child, 2nd daughter, was born sleeping 19 days ago at 20 weeks and 1 day. This video and all the heart warming comments are really getting me through this tough time. Thank you ❤
I came across your channel today after watching an OKBaby video. You are so brave. I cannot imagine the nightmare you have experienced. You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.
Thank you girls so so much
Jane Huston Cool! I am going to subscribe as well. I'm a relatively new you tube viewer and have been in a subscribing frenzy as of late! Haha.
Just came across it last night! I don't have a child but am still obsessed with this couple and channel!!!! Praying my heart out their day will come soon. This couple is what being parents is about.
BSBSPSensGirl88 That's so crazy, because I did too! Hello fellow bug buddy! Her strength and will is amazing. I am so happy that she has gotten blessed with another baby. I pray everything goes well for her.
My daughters first baby had no heartbeat as well and we were all devastated! It's a difficult to go through! God Bless you and your husband!
Just recently found this channel, and watching this had me in tears...I’ve been there mama, I had two stillborn (36wks and 38.5 wks) and still the hardest thing I’ve ever been thru. Always praying for you! 💓
I just randomly came across this video.... my heart goes out to you and your husband. May 17th 2015 I went through having to give birth to a stillborn baby girl. It's the worst thing in the entire world. I have a little boy who is now 8 so I know the joy you get after giving birth and to have to go through labor and all that and not be able to have that baby in your arms and see/kiss/hold/hug her every day for the rest of your life is terrible. There will forever be a part of your heart that is broken. I pray that you guys get the chance to get pregnant again and have a healthy baby. I now have another little girl who just was born may 20th of this year ... just a little over 2 years later... and not that anyone could ever replace the daughter I lost 2 years ago but having gone through an entire pregnancy with no problems and now having a healthy perfect baby has definitely helped. I feel like the baby I lost sent her to me and it's like having a piece of her with me always. Time 100% helps but I really truly hope you guys have all the best luck in your journey forward. You forever have a beautiful angel looking over you guys 💕
This was just recommended now 2 years later she had a beautiful baby girl and 2 healthy twin boys ❤️😍 #ripbryn
As a new ftm and so many many problems during my pregnancy this absolutely broke my heart. You are so strong! Your baby girl will always be with you and even though she's grown her angel wings don't forget you will always be a mum and dad! She was loved and there is nothing you could have done. There is absolutely nothing wrong with not being okay, take the time you need to grief 💗 It's not going to get better, but it will get easier to cope. Talking helps. 💖💖
It is always darkest before the dawn.
You are both wonderful people and I am wishing you strength and peace in this tough time. Don't lose hope for the future, you will get your earth baby soon. xo
This comment just made me tear up. Im watching this on the day of the twins birth vlog.
wow not to take away from any of the raw feelings in this video and precious Brynn but to see your 3 children now is so incredible. you have four beautiful children, 3 on earth and 1 in Heaven. I feel so blessed to see the growth of your family. thank you for sharing your amazing journey.
I went into labor and gave natural birth to my beautiful daughter Madison Rey Vasquez at 20 weeks on May 23rd, 2019. They placed her in my arms, she took one breathe and moved her arm towards me and passed away. It was the hardest and the most painful day of my life, physically, emotionally, and mentally. I still wake up each morning thinking she is still in my tummy, only to realize she is not. It's been the hardest days of my and my fiance's lives. But your videos have given me some hope and made me feel less alone and empty inside. I suffer from an incompetent cervix. I just wanted to take the time to say I'm so very sorry for you loss and thank you for sharing your story and helping provide a ray of light for me in these darkest of times. You have helped me more than you will ever know. ♥️
You will be in my prayers. Thank you for being strong enough to share your story.
Watching this while Emma is 2 months old. Still breaks my heart every time I watch it. Watching the life come back into your eyes after so much heartbreak and sadness is the best thing in the world. I love the Swannies so much and I can’t wait for your family to grow even more 💕💕
I came back to this today. Because this was the first video I ever watched. My heart is filled with joy and love!! To see you become such an amazing mama to Emma!! And your twin bows oh my!!! God is so good!!! You are amazing. & wish you the best babygirl!!! 🤍
Losing a baby never stops hurting and I'm so sorry. You are so so so sooo strong and I know she is so proud of her mommy's strength. I am just blown away with your strength! Lots of hugs from a navy spouse who recently lost a baby as well. I was not as far as you, and I am again so blown away by your strength.❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
Baby Emma is almost here. Look how much changes in a year! Both of your girls are so lucky to have you as their mama.
I am pregnant with my first child and I don't think I could have empathized to this degree until now. you are SO strong to be taking all this head on and discussing everything on your channel. I truly hope you go on to have a healthy pregnancy. no matter what you ARE a mother, and yes, HAVE a daughter. I'm sure she loved you just as much as you loved her. I'm also glad you and your husband are such comforts to one another. again- strong people :)
I'm a new subscriber and look forward to seeing what your future holds
RIP sweet baby girl. I'm so sorry for your loss. Your strength is so encouraging and sharing your experience is helping so many. Sending so much love.
You are so strong and just think in less than a week you will have your little miracle baby Emma in your hands. Brynn will always be watching and protecting her wonderful parents and her little sister from above. Sending all love and support.
This was the first video that I watched of this family. You look so happier now with your amazing and growing family. Since this video I always watch every single one and it's such a blessing to see your baby's grow and how amazing this family is.
So sorry that you had to experience such a loss. I too lost my baby boy at 17 weeks on January 16th. I'm 19 with a beautiful 2 year old boy and when my husband and I decided we wanted to expand our family, we were blessed with our angel. Sadly we only got 4 months with him but I cherish those 4 months so so much. We don't know the cause of our miscarriage but our doctor believes my body just went in to preterm labor. It has been the most traumatic thing I've experienced. Went through labor at home without knowing I was in labor and by the time I got to the hospital he was ready to be born. He lived for an hour but sadly passed away in my arms. I'm not sure why God picked me to be an angel mom but at the end of the day I'm grateful. Through all the pain and tears I am thankful to say I have a guardian angel looking over our family. I pray for you and your husband as you embark on a journey of healing. I'm blessed to say I'm currently 12 weeks pregnant with our rainbow baby and I wish nothing but the best for your family in the future. Know that there's a rainbow of hope at the end of every storm
New subscriber. I cried with you. I wanted to say something, but I know words cannot heal a broken heart. Honestly, I just want to sit with you and hug you. You're a strong beautiful woman and I know your daughter is just smiling down at you! I am praying hard for you and your family. May God bless you ❤️
I’m so sorry for your loss, I also went through a similar experience. It was truly traumatic. About 3 weeks ago, I was experiencing cramps, but didn’t think much of it, later when they didn’t go away I got worried and called the nurse line, who told me it was abdominal ligament cramps and not to worry, but when the cramps got too painful I checked into the ER, turns out it was actually contractions, I got admitted to the hospital and found out I was already 1 1/2 inch dilated. At that point there was nothing they could do, since my body kept contracting. I gave birth to my son at 20 weeks and 6 days at 2:50 am, he was alive for 2 hours. He was my first child. I felt so betrayed by my body. Most of all, cheated out of my motherhood. It’s been tough but I find comfort hearing other mother’s story, it helps me cope with the fact that I’m not alone and miscarriages happen for no apparent reasons. Thank you for sharing your story. I hope you and I both get out rainbow babies.
Your daughter was so lucky to have y'all as parents. You're going to give her future siblings such wonderful lives!
Thank you for sharing your story, it's so difficult to go through this all alone but knowing that there's so many women and stories helps with the healing process. I miscarried exactly a month after you did at 12 weeks and it was the most traumatic and saddest thing I've ever been through. It's been almost three months and I'm still struggling. Thinking of you, sending all my love and hoping you will get to hold your rainbow baby girl soon! ❤️
Sorry to hear about Brynn. What helped me after my daughter Isley passed was to make a memory box. Also I joined the MSIL group on Baby Center and met an amazing group of women who have gone through loss and are at different stages in their loss journey and when you are ready to try again they even have a TTC board. I know all too well how you feel. Hugs.
I know how this feels and please don't ever apologize for crying over baby Brynn. I went through almost the exact same thing this February and it really is traumatic. I hope your journey is filled with immense love and support. ❤️❤️
Sorry to hear about about Brynn heart breaking hearing poor mom taiking about not hearing brynn heart beat so sad For mom and dad and all the family and friends
My heart goes out to you on the loss of your sweet baby girl Brynn. In 1989 I lost my first pregnancy at 25 weeks. I went in for an ultrasound at 20 weeks because my doctor thought I might be having twins since I was measuring at 34 weeks in size. During the ultrasound, the tech was showing us the heartbeat, and the baby's hands and feet, but when she got to the head, she said the machine wasn't working right and I needed to go upstairs to see the head of the OB/GYN dept. I didn't get too nervous until that doctor did another ultrasound and told us our son had a neural tube defect, anencephaly, and that his brain and skull had not formed and there was nothing we could do except deliver our son as soon as possible. My body was compensating and making extra amniotic fluid to cushion our son in utero, which is why I was measuring so far ahead. We had the choice to continue the pregnancy to the end, but at the rate my amniotic fluid was growing, my doctor recommended ending the pregnancy since all the extra fluid was putting my health at risk. By the time I delivered my son at 25 weeks, I was measuring 40 weeks, and the extra fluid was putting undo stress on my body. Labor was induced and I had to go through 8 hours of back labor before delivering my son Ryan. He was perfect in every way, except for the neural tube defect. He weighed 1lb 2oz and was 12 inches long. It has been 28 years since I lost him. I did go on to have 3 healthy children. I know your Brynn will be watching over you and will send you the perfect little one when the time is right. Take time to grieve and heal, and when the time is right, you will get another chance to have a baby. Sending prayers and love your way from Wisconsin, from a retired military family.
As a loss Mom, with a few words of wisdom, communicate with each other. Men and women grieve so much differently. If your husband seems quieter, or different, it's his way of grieving or coping. My biggest fear was that my husband and I would not get thru our loss. Yet nine years later...we are stronger than ever!
I'm so proud of you for sharing your story. You're so brave. Stillborns aren't talked about enough in this society and all the grieving is done behind closed doors. Thank you for sharing.
So sorry for your loss. Don' t need to say sorry for your feelings, Cry if you need to you've been through so much. Hugs too you.
I feel every emotion you are feeling. i lost my baby 3/24/2017. my beautiful baby boy Charlie Cruz. you go from being so excited to welcome your baby to the devastating loss. my baby was a day old before i lost him. we were completely devastated. i hid in my house for 6 weeks and could not face anybody except my family. i feel empty and lost and every day i feel completely different. i try and keep it together but sometimes i fall apart. youre a beautiful soul and your baby is beautiful ❤️ love from san diego.
I had a similar experience, during the ultrasound to make sure none of the baby or placenta was still in me. I asked the nurse if she thought it would happen to me again, she looked at me and said, I can't tell u for sure, but I don't think this will happen again, and that she thought I'd have a healthy pregnancy the next time I get pregnant, and I wasn't sure I'd get pregnant again. I did, and I had some health issues with bleeding and pre term labor. I did go on to have a healthy baby. and I've never been pregnant again. God knew. he knew what I could and couldn't handle. my son is 13 now, and sometimes I wish he had a sibling, but he does, up in Heaven, I can't wait to meet that baby someday. I believe you will have a healthy baby, I'm sure of it, and if u only have one living child, you will be more blessed than you ever thought possible, praying for everyone's comfort. the time will come when u hold your next baby earth side.
Thank you for this hope. And your 13 year old will absolutely meet his brother again someday!
I am so sorry you know the loss of a child. The story of the birth of your daughter is beautiful and you will always keep those precious moments with her close to your heart. I lost my first born son Lucas in April 2017 after a short week with him in the NICU. He was born with a genetic disorder we had no idea we were carriers for. Seeing you cry just brought back all those feelings. I hurt for you. I know all to well how it feels to have your world shattered. You said you’re hopeful, that is the best way to put it. I think the only thing that has gotten me this far is hope, staying hopeful. Thank you for sharing your daughters story ❤️
My Mom had a miscarriage with her first baby 30+ years ago after she and my dad first got married and it absolutely devastated her. She said she’d always wanted children and that losing the baby left her with a grief so deep that she felt hollow. So I’m so incredibly sorry that you had to go through that, too. Miscarrying is something no woman should have to endure, and hearing your story just solidifies that belief.
The funny thing is, my Mom says that she always felt like my older sister (her firstborn child) was the soul of the baby she lost- like God just put it into a new body & gave it back to her. She could never explain it, it was just something she felt deeply. And whether or not it’s the same case with you, Brynn will ALWAYS be watching over you and loving you and looking out for you. She’s your angel, and she’s your blessing.
I hope and pray that you give birth to a healthy, happy little baby who will fill your heart to the brim with happiness. Just don’t lose hope, Rachelle, no matter what. I feel from the bottom of my heart that everything will turn out alright for you. I pray for you everyday!
Sending you lots of love & light!
Wow. As a new mum I couldn't even begin to fathom your pain. I am new to your channel and I pray and hope one day your tears will turn into laughter and you'll have happily squealing little children running around your house. I cried so hard and I honestly never comment on anything but this touched me so much. I admire your strength and positive outlook. Know that your beautiful little girl knows that she is loved and also that she will never be forgotten. Know that one day you WILL see your children grow and prosper and that you shall see their children too! I wish I could reach through the screen and hug you. Sending my love all the way from Germany. A thousand kisses
I just came across your blog, and I too am going through IVF. I could not do a fresh transfer in April because I was over stimuliated, but we are preparing for a frozen one in June. I too am blogging and writing about my experience. My husband and I have had a couple of miscarriages previously, and did regular feriltiy treatments years before. I understand your pain as I have lost my twins a while back. I am so sorry for your loss. It is never easy, but my advice is dont forget her, talk to people about you experience, and take it one day at a time. I still get emotional till this day, but know my babies are in a good place.
I am so sorry for your loss, I am crying with you. You are so strong to be able to share your story. My prayers are with you, Justin and Brynn. I am graduating soon to be a labor and delivery nurse and your story helped me to see how truly difficult it is to go through a still birth and I hope I can be there to support families that go through this. ❤️❤️
I'm so sorry guys. Don't let this stop you from trying again.
I'm currently looking into going to school to become an ultrasound tech and I always knew that as much good news as you tell people there's also going to be bad news and after watching this video it's made me realize that I have some mental growing to do and some strengthening to do before I go into that field of work. I'm really sensitive and easy to cry and I don't want to stress out a mother by delivering bad news in a bad way I know that was not your intention of this video but I just wanted to let you know that it made me think. I know that that wasn't your full intention with this video but I just want to thank you for being so raw and vulnerable and helping out other women that might be going through what you went through I'm watching your pregnancy Journey with baby number three right now and I just wanted to get to know you guys a little bit better so I came to this video to understand a little bit about your past
I share your pain, I had my baby girl Rubi also stillborn on May 9, 2017 just a few days before yours and everything you said I felt and now is been two months and I'm starting to smile again. I pray to God for your rainbow baby and as well for mine
I am so sorry you have to experience this pain. I lost my little boy at 18 weeks, it is by far the worst pain I have ever felt, no parent should ever have to feel the pain of losing their child. She is absolutely beautiful! Many prayers to you and your family.
My heart is broken for you and Justin I am crying for the both of you . I am 15 weeks pregnant and can't imagine what your feeling. I pray you get that beautiful baby on earth.
Your story is really helping me...I lost my son June 10, 2017 at 20 weeks. My husband and I were devastated and I still struggle with him not being here with us but I know he is in heaven and is our angel watching over us. You and your husband are giving me hope because we also have been trying and have not been successful and I felt myself getting depressed all over again. I know exactly how you feel and it’s a rough situation to deal with but I thank you for your courage in sharing
Im so sorry for your loss. I too am a fellow angel mommy. My first baby was stillborn at 26 weeks and like you was also a girl, I named her Brianna. You are definitely in my prayers and just know that god will bless you with another child or 2 or 3 ☺. 2 years after I lost my first baby god blessed me with my first son and 6 months after he was born i got pregnant with my second son. I now have a healthy 11 year old and 10 year old. Stay strong love! ❤❤❤
Erika Rodriguez qq
I stumbled across your channel randomly early on during my pregnancy for my daughter. I have spent the past 8 months or so following you through your pregnancy. Your story of Brynn broke my heart. On Friday, July 20th, 2018... the day before my due date for my daughter Layla, your story became my story too. I gave birth to my angel baby on Sunday, July 22nd 2018. I truly believe I found your channel when I did for a reason, to give me hope and faith and to show me I’m not alone in this horribly unfair tragedy . ❤️❤️❤️
Watching this right after you’ve had the twins and I just want to hug you. You are so incredibly strong and I wish I could tell the girl in this video all that is to come❤️
Coming back and seeing these videos hurt my heart for you. Being pregnant I cant help but watch things like these and just feel grateful but also worry a little cuz its still so early. Anyways, enough of that. I didnt realize how much younger u look here 💕 i feel like u have came sooooo far 😍 and seeing where u are now just ugh, girl im so happy for u and justin and seeing emma walking around and knowing shes about to become a big sister to two little babies... i cant. I am so excited and happy for u
I hope your baby made it here safe. I’m watching as I just lost my daughter yesterday. This is helping me cope just knowing I’m not alone. God bless
It wasn't until now, after you beautiful twin boys were born the other day, that I could bring myself to watch this one. How much you've been through, dear friends. And how deserving you are of the blessings that have come into your lives since this most excruciating time. God Bless!
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I have been wanting to hug you kiss your head through this video even though I don't know you. I pray that you feel God's arms around you now and feel your beautiful Brynn with you always and every day. You are a brave and beautiful soul and I will be praying that you will know the joy of bringing your child home to raise; that child and Brynn will be so blessed to have you and Justin as their momma and daddy.
This video is
This is my first time watching this couple and I found out that they lost this child which is so sad . But they had twins I’m so glad for you both. God has blessed you!!!
I lost my first child, a boy, at 26 weeks and want you to know that you are doing well, cried like baby at this video.
Oh my gosh this video popped up after I watched your birth story! I'm so happy you have your little miracle baby Emma now ❤️ so crazy how much things can change in such a short period of time. Could not be happier for you guys!
Thank you for sharing 💜 I recently lost my baby girl Hannah, she was stillborn at 24 weeks. I hadn’t felt movement for a few days and had written it off as normal as I had an anterior placenta and thought she wasn’t old enough to distinguish a complete movement pattern. I got a Doppler to reassure myself and after not finding her heartbeat went to the emergency where they confirmed she’d passed. Delivering her and having to leave the hospital empty handed is the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do... I have found a lot of comfort in finding similar stories. It’s hard knowing I’ll never have an answer as to why I lost her but it’s true that there is such an output of love from family and an amazing community of women who understand the pain and can offer support to one another 💜💜
My heart just hurts watching this. Prayers your way even though I’m watching this two years later.
Ugh I’ve been keeping up with all the women who struggled with infertility and loss for awhile now, and now all of them have babies now ❤️ my heart is so happy. Thinking of all you ❤️
I'm so so sorry for your loss. My husband and I recently lost our first born baby boy on June 1 😥 his name is Hudson.
SO sorry for your sweet baby boys passing. Praying you have healing!
I can't imagine what losing a child is like considering I'm 16 years old and am still a virgin. I am praying for you.
Oh Hun I'm so so sorry 😪
My sister in law also lost 2 baby girls at 20 weeks, 2 different pregnancies, and till this day they couldn't find out what went wrong, but after a couple of years she was just blessed with another baby girl who is 7 weeks old now. Remain hopeful and positive that one day soon you will hold your baby in your arms soon. Sending you and Justin lots of love and hugs ❤️
I admire the way you talk about your daughter. You will always be her mommy and she will always be your daughter. I can't imagine what you're going through but you are a strong woman to talk about it. Sending much love your way
Brynn is such a beautiful name. It suits her ❤️ I'm so sorry for your loss. She will always be your first daughter ❤️ sending so much luck and love to you guys
On my floor in tears for you. You are so brave. I am so sorry for your loss and the pain you've experienced. God, bless this family
My heart ached for you as I watched you tell your story. I too have experienced that moment when you look at the screen and don't see a heart beat. Hearing you talk about it took me back to that moment and the moments that followed. I've been able to move on and find hope again, but it still pains me to think of that time. I hope that you have been able to find some measure of peace after such a difficult experience.
Oh my heart is in pieces for you. There are just no words. I lost a daughter to a NTD at around 18 weeks and that delivery is the saddest thing that has ever happened in my life. I'm so glad you got to spend some time with her. There is hope, I have two healthy little children now and I remember those moments where that seemed impossible. I will be praying for the two of you and hope that your hearts can be healed
We lost our son Jaxon at 36 weeks. It was a shock to say the least. The hardest part is we have no idea why he passed.... he just did.... It was a perfect pregnancy up until that point. Anyways I don't want to ramble too long.... I know that lots of people experience the same thing.
This video just popped up on my feed and I’m so sorry you had to go through this. Everything happens for a reason, sometimes we don’t know why because it doesn’t make any sense but know your baby is with God and is truly loved. I know you just had your baby and I’m so eternally grateful and happy for you and Justin. You deserve so much happiness and I’m extremely grateful to be able to watch your videos and watch your family grow. ❤️
Hi Rachelle sweetie, My heart hurts for you I can only imagine what you going through hugs to you and Justin, this is really just so sad I'm was wondering if you were going to try again, I feel so happy to hear that your not giving up your a real trouper! Please keep vlogging so we can follow your journey, Stay strong sweetie god loves you and he dose have a plan just have faith your going to have a baby keep that in your thoughts ok? You take care of your self and all of us are here for you we dont physically know each other but we are friends and we care very much, love from your viewer Marilyn...
It's really awesome of you for being so open about your experience, I can only imagine how hard it must be to vlog stuff like this but you must be helping so many people. Sending love your way, you will make an amazing mom one day xoxo
I feel your pain, I lost my daughter last month at 36 weeks aswell, her funeral is next week, we are still waiting for the post mortem results. It’s the worst thing I’ve ever had to go through. And I feel sorry for anyone who’s experienced it to, I wouldn’t wish it on my worst enemy. My body is still healing and I also find it super hard to go out, baby items in the shops are the hardest thing to look at. I was high risk both pregnancie to. I am so sorry for your loss. X
chantelx
My goodness I'm so sorry for your loss!
I lost a baby girl at 39weeks, 8 years ago, to this day I still think of her and I can't help but be drawn to kids that would be her age. All I can say is take your time grieving but know it does get better! Stay strong momma.
Im here rewatching this video! It’s so incredible sad that you didn’t get to raise your beautiful girl!
Im so sorry this happened to you guys.
Its beautiful that you are so happy right now, with your sweet girl emma.
I wish you all the happines you can get. I love u