It’s so funny you say your struggling with content lately, I’ve been watching you for 4-5 years now and your content lately has felt like such a gift to me, it’s so real and honest and I feel like I’m catching up with a sister. Just wanted to share that encouragement, God is using you! 🤍
It will get better sis! ❤ I used to be involved in prostitution & just being very promiscuous back in the day. I always hate what I’ve done, however, once I got saved God transformed my life. Sex is still hard at times, but we must continue to purify our minds & hearts & not let our minds run so wild during sex with our husbands. Just pray even before sex & God will continue to renew your mind. ❤ love you girl & you will not be held down by this forever. 💗 PTSD & anxiety will get better overtime. 🩷
Your labor and delivery was very intense. After an intense delivery with my son (17 hours), I think I was honestly traumatized for about a year after. I didn’t really talk for the first few months after. Sending you love and healing. You’re truly a warrior. Please give yourself credit for how amazing you are. Be gentle with yourself 🤍
This needs to be talked about more!! I was like this after a traumatic birth and unplanned cesarean with my daughter. I literally would bawl uncontrollably if it was brought up in any way, I isolated bad. My 3rd and last baby was born in 2023 and it was seriously the easiest labor and delivery (VBAC). That brought tremendous healing from my daughter’s birth too. Birth trauma is very real and I truly didn’t even know that was a common thing until I went through it!! It’s just not talked about 😔
Hello Kian, as a 50 year old mother of 3, I still get the pms hard, can't wait to not have periods anymore. You Kian, are amazing, strong yet gentle, smart, pretty, a true warrior, great mother and wife. I watched your birth video and I was in awe with your strength. Praise God!!!! For he is good all the time. I love you guys, I appreciate your videos very much. Greetings and many blessings from Florida❤
Thank you for your honesty and videos lately, Kian! I had my first baby three weeks ago and your videos are always so refreshing and life giving to me. I always walk away feeling more inspired and challenged to pursue my relationship with God, slow down, appreciate the small things, and seek community. I appreciate it!
You’re not alone. Just before I get my period I get really sad, borderline depressed. It feels like everything that usually bothers me (but I suppress) is magnetised and I’m not able to suppress it.
thank you so much for opening up about your intimacy struggles!! i’m almost 7 months postpartum and it’s been my biggest struggle too..i also had a long and difficult unmedicated birth with tearing and hemorrhaging.. i have so much trauma and it also brings up past trauma so you saying that really helped me feel not alone. my husband is very understanding but i feel so bad. Lord please deliver us from trauma ❤
Thank you so much Kian for being so open and honest about your postpartum sex struggles. I am five months postpartum myself now and it's something I really struggle with. I come from a non-Christian background and have had relationships in the past where it felt like I had to give sex to keep the person in the relationship. And with zero libido postpartum and difficult healing with a bladder prolapse from labour, all of those trauma feelings of "having" to have come back up. Just hearing someone else say that trauma has resurfaced postpartum helps so much. Thank you again and praying for healing for you ❤
Silent viewer here :) Kian, I’ve been watching your videos for a few years now and now I’m a mom to a 4 month old. During each season of my life you have brought so much life and encouragement to me. This video though truly wrecked me and I don’t know what God is doing or did but I started crying as I was feeding my baby and watching this video and I guess I felt like you were in the room with me as you were sharing your life with us. So thank you for being obedient and posting this video. You are a blessing to many people, you’re doing great and I’ll be praying for you! Thank you for still pushing through and please don’t give up UA-cam! (Unless God says so) You’re beautiful and talented! ❤
Thank you so much for your vulnerability, Kian. Will be keeping you and your little family in my prayers. ❤ Your videos encourage me to further surrender my personal struggles to Jesus.
Praying for you Kian! I went through a similar journey with my sexuality. The Lord has brought healing and redemption to my life in this area. I am believing the same for you! God bless you 💕
I haven’t even finished this video. Yet, I have to pause it..To say at 48years old, I also go through what you go through when having your period. Definitely I have to Pray for Protection over my mind, to have a sound mind and clear thinking! Also take my emotions to The Lord in Prayer! I totally relate to what you are saying about your thoughts, be anxious and overwhelmed! I have prayed to be content with quiet. Not listening to or watching a UA-cam video, that creates more stimulation to to my brain! Yes, very helpful to have quiet when driving! I find myself praying more, having more peace! Processing my thoughts more! When Struggling with something recently that was really hard. Really praying specific things like for Peace, Contentment with whatever The Lord’s Will was. Also Praying to Lord to have Thankfulness and To Give The Lord Praise and Glory for what He has Given Me and Husband! Even if it wasn’t His Plan for me to Have a Tubal Reversal and Have More Children! I had some Pelvic Physical Therapy. Part of it had to do with my bladder. Yet the Lord has Revealed to me, that certain emotions I have affect my Pelvic and Bladder Muscles. So I can do certain exercises to help. But, it all starts in the mind! So it comes back to Submitting it all to the Lord! It has been a long Journey! The Lord has done so much healing in Me! Mentally,Spiritually and Physically! Praise Jesus!
Prayer request: I struggle to pray often and have long talks with the lord. I know he knows what's going on in my mind but I find it hard to talk about it with him. thank u to whoever prayed for me!
Oh sweet mama❤ I can completely relate. I just went through a very hard labor, lots of tearing as well, and a sexual past I’m not proud of. It’s bringing a lot up for me postpartum. Know that you’re not alone in everything you’re feeling!
Thank you for sharing in such a real way. I’ve been following your journey for years now and have always felt so at home, like I’m catching up with a friend. Inspired to take that time in the morning to connect with God and myself now.
You are so precious Kian! I appreciate your honesty and vulnerability. So many of us have a story similar to yours. You are already helping by sharing your testimony - even through your struggles and even if you don't have all of the answers. God is the Great Physician and I am confident that He will heal you in Jesus Mighty Name! Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to Him, and He will make your paths straight. Praying for you sister 💙🙏💙
women go through so much on this earth. I’m 22, not married, have no kids and yet can relate to so many of the points and struggles you shared. That’s a refreshing aspect of your channel and of womanhood in general.
Thank you for your transparency. I just had my 3rd baby 3 months ago. He has been having seizures since he was born and it has been the darkest, loneliest, anxiety filled, scariest time of my life. I think I push my postpartum mental health to the back of everything to focus on the baby, my other two kids and my husband are taken care of. Plus, my husband confessed a sin to me during this time. It has been such a hard season. I’m alone with the kids while waiting for God to heal my baby. I’ve been alone when he has had seizures with the other kids. It’s such a hard thing to experience. We’re trying to raise money so my husband can take the rest of his unpaid paternity leave. I trust our God to provide and make a way.
I'll keep you, your baby and your family in my prayers, Sister! The Lord is right there with you and He will make a way! 🧡 Much love from Germany, Kristina
wow im so sorry, this sounds extremely hard 😭. Praying for you! Praying that you would find community in this time as well, I know that helped me so much postpartum.
Wow I’ve been loving your authentic videos. I love your honesty, Kian. God is going to heal you 💗 I know it. Something I have been struggling with is focus and temptation.
Hi Kian, Just want to encourage you during your time of healing in intimacy. I do not have children, but did have another partner before I was married and I relate so much to your battle. Thank you for talking about the effects because it’s not something that I was ever told about either. The Lord has brought so much healing in my marriage and I know he will do that for you too! ❤
Kian, thank you so much for this, my soul is always refreshed by your videos and I genuinely feel like I am just listening to a friend. Thank you for being a true light for Christ in your honesty and encouragement to others. God is truly using you!
Praying for you Kian! I’m absolutely amazed now I’ve been watching you for 4 years now and just the journey you’ve been on gives me so much hope with healing in this areas of sexuality. God is faithful to you and your family. He’s got you ❤❤
Kian , i really wanna say , your new hair cut is sooo beautiful sis. ❤️🥰 i feel your situation though... God is always with you dear , God is close to the broken hearted and those crushed in spirit ❤ I love you sooo much 🙆🏻♀️
Lifting you up in prayer, Kian. We all go through such times, so know that you are not alone. Spending time in solitude and gratitude is very wise and can change the trajectory of your day. 🙏🏻
KIAN 🌸 thank you for this video! I have a similar promiscuous past and it makes me nervous for sex in marriage. But I’m believing for healing & that God will bring me the right man to walk through it together. ❤
I've actually been reading that book River Dwellers too! (very slowly over the past couple months haha). I had also read Soul Care a couple years ago and it was a big catalyst in some deliverance I experienced. But this encouraged me to get back to reading River Dwellers, and just overall encouraged me to go spend time in prayer and be with the Lord. Thank you for all you shared in this video!!
Kian! You're doing so good with what you're struggling with and you're so self aware, this is great! It's really nice that you're taking time to heal and making space for yourself to process some things. I'll be praying for you, may Lord give you the grace you need! Take care🩷
Literally less than 2 minutes in but wanted to pause to say I 100% relate to the “yikes, here’s the period darkness” feeling but then I was diagnosed with PMDD and my mood, motivation, and self-image stabilized soooo quickly once I started treatment! It of course may or may not be your story, and it’s not that I don’t have any swings throughout my cycle but it’s a night and day difference to how dark I used to get right before my cycle started each month. Just a thought 💭
Hey Kian! I just had my first baby 2 months ago, I too am really struggling to feel beautiful in my body. Most of my friends who have had babies look like they never had one two weeks after birth. Finding out that wasn't the case for me has made it very difficult for me not to compair myself. Thank you for being honest about how you're doing postpartum. I find you so so encouraging. I always look forward to your videos!..... also, we are our own worst critics because you are stunning inside and out! ❤❤❤
Never commenter on videos either, but couldn't stop myself. We all go through what you are talking about in this video, and for you to bring that in your content is perhaps a relief for someone. Maybe God wants you to speak how you truly feel and liberate us all from perfectionism... also, I've been watching your videos for about 4 years for sure and you have never looked better
Lifting you up in prayer Kian and someone below! I need prayer for the same thing.. I had a very sexually sinful past and sugar daddies and 5 years later I am newly married and struggling a bit. I am feeling a bit of pride in my heart creep back in which needs prayer as well and also prayer for my husband's faith to be strengthened through the difficult time he is facing- with work/family... praying he takes time to be still and mediate on the Lord before the stressors of his day begin. Lastly, community..Thank you!
Thank you for making this video. I love a good girl chat video. Prayer request: My husband and I are currently trying to buy a house. Please pray for God to bring us a house soon!
Thank you for being so raw and honest about postpartum! No one ever talks about these things postpartum is not all about cute baby stuff and baby wearing. I couldn’t even wear my son due to my traumatic birth it wasn’t physically possible for me.
lolol your outro keeping in the different takes of you thanking your viewers for dealing with your hormones throughout the video; that last one as you're yawning 😆"now I have to edit this" How much did you laugh while editing that outro part? I love editing video clips that make me laugh. I feel like a mad person sitting there laughing to myself over and over with the same clips. I appreciate your girl chat with these vulnerable topics! In Jesus' name, heal Kian where she needs it most and strengthen her so that she feels even stronger than she's ever felt. Thank you for your peace and infinite wisdom, Lord.
Hi! I am a pelvic floor PT and talk with my patients about the trauma from birth and intimacy often. I would recommend looking into CFT (crainosacral myofascial therapy), finding a massage therapist or physical therapist/ OT, that is trained in this specifically. CFT can help relieve the tension wherever you may be holding it, and with that come our emotions, too! People often cry afterwards or during the session as things surface. I’ll be praying for you!! 💚
✨You are a bright light, Kian!✨ Thank you for the hope that you give to countless lives! My prayer for you tonight is that God will lavish you with whatever it is that you need to fully heal from lingering trauma. Satan’s lies are the worst! Remember who(se) you are! ✨💖✨
Thank you for sharing your struggles. I had multiple partners before getting married and getting saved. I had to repent for each one, break off soul ties and covenant ties with each one. The Holy Spirit will lead you.
I feel you girl! Generally speaking wanting to share with you Mark de jesus. He talks a lot about mental health and OCD and overthinking and perfectionism in the context of the bible and Gods love. Maybe this can be a resource for you, and anyone reading this. He is helping me soo much and my therapist when I can't afford another session haha and he does it with so much humor too, which really helps!
Kian thank you for your honesty of struggling with sex postpartum, I have been a follower for years on your channel ane rememember your testomny video when you posted it. I am also a wife of 6 years now, 3 perfect babies and I still feel the creeping of past sexual regrets but I can say it does get lighter to carry, not easier but less of my cross to carry that the lord is healing and repairing the parts that were left outside of my marriage covenant. I will keep you in prayers also ❤ The devil can scrap but the lord has won!
Aww bless your heart Kian! Give it to the Lord and he will sustain you! Also from a physical perspective please consider pelvic floor physical therapy, there may be some physiologic reasons that are contributing to your issues with postpartum sex. Scarring can cause more pain and then cause anticipation of pain which might be contributing to some of your issues.
Kian, I can’t tell you how similar our stories are and how much we are literally in the same boat right now in terms of sexual & physical healing. I wish we could get coffee & chat & cry & pray together lol I know the suffering you are experiencing in the waiting. Love & hugs xoxo ❤
My husband and I had major struggles after our first born. Our sex life was awful. He thought I hated him. His self esteem was destroyed. I felt like the worst wife ever. I eventually got on levothyroxine which helped me but just know you’re not alone.
My name is Gabriela, and I do believe that the Lord is the Lord is in the process of healing and will Heal you and will do so at any time. Just keep praying and believing because, it can happen!🫶🏻
Please be praying for me! It is my first pregnancy since a second trimester lost with our first. Please pray for a healthy baby and my peace and trust in God ❤️
Pray request to have answers to body aches. May God heal my aches and pains so I can enjoy upcoming trips this summer, and not have days wasted being housebound from headaches, neckaches and backaches
About asking for a prayer.. The hardest for me right now is baby girl due any day now and she doesn’t have a finished room, she has all the necessary things but it’s nothing fancy, her room is still like a construction site and we can’t see the way financially to go forward… God has blessed us above and beyond and we can OWN a house, but making it feel like a home is something I really struggle with… at the moment we don’t have an oven and we have 0 “aesthetic”, and honestly I’m trying to stay as grateful as I possibly can, but letting go of control and order is something I always struggled with, and with all the uncertainty I feel like I’m drowning in endless “what ifs”
Healing emotionally is always a process. Christian Counseling could really help with this. God ordains sex through marriage. He can take away all your shame, guilt, and embarrassment once you are ready to give it all to him. Knowing who you are and realizing your self worth through Christ is life changing. ❤ God wants you to have a great sex life with your husband. You can’t change the past but that’s why we thank the Lord for Jesus’s sacrifice for our lives. I’ve never been in your specific position but to overcome some sexual abuse as a child I did EMDR therapy and that’s honestly the only therapy that helped emotionally. I am currently undergoing pelvic floor therapy as well for my body’s response. Sometimes we have to rebuke certain thoughts in the name of Jesus and ask the Lord to replace it with his Holy Spirit. The devil will use anything he can against you. Remember the armor of God and use them to defeat him. Wishing you all the best.❤
Also, im praying that you feel a breakthrough of healing from the top of your head to your tiptoes in Jesus name! I plead the blood of Jesus over your mind, will, emotions & that you feel immense JOY flowing from your belly into your whole life. Bless you 🤍💛
First of all you look so beautiful 😍 never looked better. Secondly thank you so much for sharing ❤ Body image was my biggest struggle. I really struggled with my body imagine after having my first, I actually wanted to cry everyday looking at myself specially because I realised I used to have so much pride in my previous body and was obsessed with working out which I believe was consequence of all the bullying during my childhood. I tried to start working out and struggled as I saw myself losing weight but it was so slow and the body shape being totally different 😢 My first is now 2 years old and I just had my second and I am being much kinder to myself now though I am still trying to lose the weight from my first 🫠 I pray God heals you ❤ All of us have a past that tries to hunt us down sometimes but nothing is impossible to the God that we serve. We will be healed and restored in Jesus Christ Name
I too struggle to enjoy sex. I have a really tough background sexually that involved addiction and impure relationships and I’m also in recovery. I have 2 children and I go to pelvic floor physical therapy to help with my postpartum recovery. I don’t have the same story as you but sometimes I feel like things will never get better, but it will!❤
I am in a season of waiting for a baby. I have had 2, possibly 3 pregnancy losses in the last 12 months. Could use some prayers 😢. It’s been so hard and Satan is getting in my head.
Hi!!! Love your videos!!! Keep up the good work!!! I’m really struggling right now. I’m trying to pray and read my Bible but it’s really hard to right now. I’m dealing with church hurt at the hands of leadership in my church (no I wasn’t sexually abused but I do believe that I was emotionally manipulated) and no one understands. I love my church but when you get hurt by the people in it (or specifically five people, including leaders) it’s hard to go to church. I don’t know how to handle it. I can’t necessarily stop going to church because it’s a requirement for living with my parents. Do you have any tips on how to prioritize God in hard seasons??? That along with prayer would be greatly appreciated!!!
praying for you as I listen and then I wonder what our Heavenly Father must think. Pure. He sees you and thinks of you as pure. Then I think of how you are a new creation, but not in your mind and your body- therefore there is some easy triggers for trauma. But in Romans chapter 12 we see renewing your mind, I believe there can and will be a deep renewing of your mind to align it with the thoughts God has for you, and about you. Wish you could come and talk to my teenagers at church, you have such a testimony. You are also glowing , love you sister
It is a secular book, but is 2nd to the bible of things that have transformed my life. The Queen's Code, by alison armstrong... I recommend it to every woman.
I was a virgin when I married and I hate sex and have a very negative relationship with sex. I feel degraded and I notice my husband likes me more when he doesn’t get it so I work hard to be obedient in my marriage covenant and keep sex regular but that doesn’t mean it’s easy for girls who waited either. It’s probably a result of our fallen world that most women don’t like sex!
It’s so funny you say your struggling with content lately, I’ve been watching you for 4-5 years now and your content lately has felt like such a gift to me, it’s so real and honest and I feel like I’m catching up with a sister. Just wanted to share that encouragement, God is using you! 🤍
Thank you bella 🫶
@@Kian_Wolfgangso true your content is a delight
Totally agree! Kian´s honest moments are such a blessing, they always bring so much peace and inspiration.
It will get better sis! ❤ I used to be involved in prostitution & just being very promiscuous back in the day. I always hate what I’ve done, however, once I got saved God transformed my life. Sex is still hard at times, but we must continue to purify our minds & hearts & not let our minds run so wild during sex with our husbands. Just pray even before sex & God will continue to renew your mind. ❤ love you girl & you will not be held down by this forever. 💗 PTSD & anxiety will get better overtime. 🩷
this is so helpful, praying before sex! thank you, i needed to see this ❤
@@SimplySami13 Amen sis 💖 It’s all God not me. Glad the short testimony could help someone else as well. :) It will get better with Christ. 💗
Thank you for the encouragement! 🥲
Your labor and delivery was very intense. After an intense delivery with my son (17 hours), I think I was honestly traumatized for about a year after. I didn’t really talk for the first few months after. Sending you love and healing. You’re truly a warrior. Please give yourself credit for how amazing you are. Be gentle with yourself 🤍
This needs to be talked about more!! I was like this after a traumatic birth and unplanned cesarean with my daughter. I literally would bawl uncontrollably if it was brought up in any way, I isolated bad. My 3rd and last baby was born in 2023 and it was seriously the easiest labor and delivery (VBAC). That brought tremendous healing from my daughter’s birth too. Birth trauma is very real and I truly didn’t even know that was a common thing until I went through it!! It’s just not talked about 😔
thank you!
Hello Kian, as a 50 year old mother of 3, I still get the pms hard, can't wait to not have periods anymore. You Kian, are amazing, strong yet gentle, smart, pretty, a true warrior, great mother and wife. I watched your birth video and I was in awe with your strength. Praise God!!!! For he is good all the time. I love you guys, I appreciate your videos very much. Greetings and many blessings from Florida❤
Thank you for your honesty and videos lately, Kian! I had my first baby three weeks ago and your videos are always so refreshing and life giving to me. I always walk away feeling more inspired and challenged to pursue my relationship with God, slow down, appreciate the small things, and seek community. I appreciate it!
thank you, definitely need to slow down and prioritize my time with God!
You’re not alone. Just before I get my period I get really sad, borderline depressed. It feels like everything that usually bothers me (but I suppress) is magnetised and I’m not able to suppress it.
thank you so much for opening up about your intimacy struggles!! i’m almost 7 months postpartum and it’s been my biggest struggle too..i also had a long and difficult unmedicated birth with tearing and hemorrhaging.. i have so much trauma and it also brings up past trauma so you saying that really helped me feel not alone. my husband is very understanding but i feel so bad. Lord please deliver us from trauma ❤
Thank you so much Kian for being so open and honest about your postpartum sex struggles. I am five months postpartum myself now and it's something I really struggle with. I come from a non-Christian background and have had relationships in the past where it felt like I had to give sex to keep the person in the relationship. And with zero libido postpartum and difficult healing with a bladder prolapse from labour, all of those trauma feelings of "having" to have come back up. Just hearing someone else say that trauma has resurfaced postpartum helps so much. Thank you again and praying for healing for you ❤
ugh so so relatable, thanks for sharing 🤍
Silent viewer here :) Kian, I’ve been watching your videos for a few years now and now I’m a mom to a 4 month old. During each season of my life you have brought so much life and encouragement to me. This video though truly wrecked me and I don’t know what God is doing or did but I started crying as I was feeding my baby and watching this video and I guess I felt like you were in the room with me as you were sharing your life with us. So thank you for being obedient and posting this video. You are a blessing to many people, you’re doing great and I’ll be praying for you! Thank you for still pushing through and please don’t give up UA-cam! (Unless God says so)
You’re beautiful and talented! ❤
Thank you so much for your vulnerability, Kian. Will be keeping you and your little family in my prayers. ❤ Your videos encourage me to further surrender my personal struggles to Jesus.
Praying for you Kian! I went through a similar journey with my sexuality. The Lord has brought healing and redemption to my life in this area. I am believing the same for you! God bless you 💕
I haven’t even finished this video. Yet, I have to pause it..To say at 48years old, I also go through what you go through when having your period. Definitely I have to Pray for Protection over my mind, to have a sound mind and clear thinking! Also take my emotions to The Lord in Prayer!
I totally relate to what you are saying about your thoughts, be anxious and overwhelmed!
I have prayed to be content with quiet. Not listening to or watching a UA-cam video, that creates more stimulation to to my brain!
Yes, very helpful to have quiet when driving!
I find myself praying more, having more peace!
Processing my thoughts more!
When Struggling with something recently that was really hard. Really praying specific things like for Peace, Contentment with whatever The Lord’s Will was. Also Praying to Lord to have Thankfulness and To Give The Lord Praise and Glory for what He has Given Me and Husband! Even if it wasn’t His Plan for me to Have a Tubal Reversal and Have More Children!
I had some Pelvic Physical Therapy. Part of it had to do with my bladder.
Yet the Lord has Revealed to me, that certain emotions I have affect my Pelvic and Bladder Muscles. So I can do certain exercises to help. But, it all starts in the mind!
So it comes back to Submitting it all to the Lord!
It has been a long Journey! The Lord has done so much healing in Me! Mentally,Spiritually and Physically! Praise Jesus!
Prayer request: I struggle to pray often and have long talks with the lord. I know he knows what's going on in my mind but I find it hard to talk about it with him. thank u to whoever prayed for me!
Oh sweet mama❤ I can completely relate. I just went through a very hard labor, lots of tearing as well, and a sexual past I’m not proud of. It’s bringing a lot up for me postpartum. Know that you’re not alone in everything you’re feeling!
thank you paige! definitely brought up a lot that I need to intentionally process with Jesus!
Thank you for sharing in such a real way. I’ve been following your journey for years now and have always felt so at home, like I’m catching up with a friend. Inspired to take that time in the morning to connect with God and myself now.
Thank you for being so open and vulnerable, Kian! This was an inspirational and sweet Girl Chat. 🧡
You are so precious Kian! I appreciate your honesty and vulnerability. So many of us have a story similar to yours. You are already helping by sharing your testimony - even through your struggles and even if you don't have all of the answers. God is the Great Physician and I am confident that He will heal you in Jesus Mighty Name! Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to Him, and He will make your paths straight. Praying for you sister 💙🙏💙
💞💞💞 first time mama here, less than 3 months postpartum. thank you for sharing. hugs 🤍
women go through so much on this earth. I’m 22, not married, have no kids and yet can relate to so many of the points and struggles you shared. That’s a refreshing aspect of your channel and of womanhood in general.
Thank you for your transparency. I just had my 3rd baby 3 months ago. He has been having seizures since he was born and it has been the darkest, loneliest, anxiety filled, scariest time of my life. I think I push my postpartum mental health to the back of everything to focus on the baby, my other two kids and my husband are taken care of. Plus, my husband confessed a sin to me during this time. It has been such a hard season. I’m alone with the kids while waiting for God to heal my baby. I’ve been alone when he has had seizures with the other kids. It’s such a hard thing to experience. We’re trying to raise money so my husband can take the rest of his unpaid paternity leave. I trust our God to provide and make a way.
I'll keep you, your baby and your family in my prayers, Sister! The Lord is right there with you and He will make a way! 🧡 Much love from Germany, Kristina
Praying for you ❤
wow im so sorry, this sounds extremely hard 😭. Praying for you! Praying that you would find community in this time as well, I know that helped me so much postpartum.
Wow I’ve been loving your authentic videos. I love your honesty, Kian. God is going to heal you 💗 I know it. Something I have been struggling with is focus and temptation.
You are so brave & I respect you so much Kian! Thank you for your vulnerability & honesty... it helps more than you know. I admire you so much! 🤍
I love the realness! ❤
Hi Kian,
Just want to encourage you during your time of healing in intimacy. I do not have children, but did have another partner before I was married and I relate so much to your battle. Thank you for talking about the effects because it’s not something that I was ever told about either. The Lord has brought so much healing in my marriage and I know he will do that for you too! ❤
Kian, thank you so much for this, my soul is always refreshed by your videos and I genuinely feel like I am just listening to a friend. Thank you for being a true light for Christ in your honesty and encouragement to others. God is truly using you!
Praying for you Kian! I’m absolutely amazed now I’ve been watching you for 4 years now and just the journey you’ve been on gives me so much hope with healing in this areas of sexuality. God is faithful to you and your family. He’s got you ❤❤
Thank you for your honesty and vulnerability ❤ praying for you Kian
Praying as well xx
Your such a strong cookie xx love you sharing your faith and personal faith. Xx
Kian , i really wanna say , your new hair cut is sooo beautiful sis. ❤️🥰 i feel your situation though... God is always with you dear , God is close to the broken hearted and those crushed in spirit ❤ I love you sooo much 🙆🏻♀️
Lifting you up in prayer Kian 🙏🏼 you will be completely healed and set free from all past trauma in Jesus name!
Lifting you up in prayer, Kian. We all go through such times, so know that you are not alone. Spending time in solitude and gratitude is very wise and can change the trajectory of your day. 🙏🏻
KIAN 🌸 thank you for this video! I have a similar promiscuous past and it makes me nervous for sex in marriage. But I’m believing for healing & that God will bring me the right man to walk through it together. ❤
Your honesty is always so refreshing ❤
I've actually been reading that book River Dwellers too! (very slowly over the past couple months haha). I had also read Soul Care a couple years ago and it was a big catalyst in some deliverance I experienced. But this encouraged me to get back to reading River Dwellers, and just overall encouraged me to go spend time in prayer and be with the Lord. Thank you for all you shared in this video!!
Kian! You're doing so good with what you're struggling with and you're so self aware, this is great! It's really nice that you're taking time to heal and making space for yourself to process some things.
I'll be praying for you, may Lord give you the grace you need! Take care🩷
Literally less than 2 minutes in but wanted to pause to say I 100% relate to the “yikes, here’s the period darkness” feeling but then I was diagnosed with PMDD and my mood, motivation, and self-image stabilized soooo quickly once I started treatment! It of course may or may not be your story, and it’s not that I don’t have any swings throughout my cycle but it’s a night and day difference to how dark I used to get right before my cycle started each month. Just a thought 💭
Hey Kian! I just had my first baby 2 months ago, I too am really struggling to feel beautiful in my body.
Most of my friends who have had babies look like they never had one two weeks after birth.
Finding out that wasn't the case for me has made it very difficult for me not to compair myself.
Thank you for being honest about how you're doing postpartum. I find you so so encouraging. I always look forward to your videos!..... also, we are our own worst critics because you are stunning inside and out! ❤❤❤
Never commenter on videos either, but couldn't stop myself. We all go through what you are talking about in this video, and for you to bring that in your content is perhaps a relief for someone. Maybe God wants you to speak how you truly feel and liberate us all from perfectionism...
also, I've been watching your videos for about 4 years for sure and you have never looked better
I just loved this video, we need more sincere and vulnerable testimonies, after watching I remembered again that faith is very important
Lifting you up in prayer Kian and someone below! I need prayer for the same thing.. I had a very sexually sinful past and sugar daddies and 5 years later I am newly married and struggling a bit. I am feeling a bit of pride in my heart creep back in which needs prayer as well and also prayer for my husband's faith to be strengthened through the difficult time he is facing- with work/family... praying he takes time to be still and mediate on the Lord before the stressors of his day begin. Lastly, community..Thank you!
Thank you! Praying for you Sara!! Congratulations on getting married, praying for a humble heart posture during this time of stretching and refining.
Thank you for making this video. I love a good girl chat video.
Prayer request:
My husband and I are currently trying to buy a house. Please pray for God to bring us a house soon!
Loved this, you’re doing great! God bless you and your family and thank you for sharing your vulnerability!
Thank you for being so raw and honest about postpartum! No one ever talks about these things postpartum is not all about cute baby stuff and baby wearing. I couldn’t even wear my son due to my traumatic birth it wasn’t physically possible for me.
Thank you for sharing your journey even its its painful! I hope your healing comes!
lolol your outro keeping in the different takes of you thanking your viewers for dealing with your hormones throughout the video; that last one as you're yawning 😆"now I have to edit this" How much did you laugh while editing that outro part? I love editing video clips that make me laugh. I feel like a mad person sitting there laughing to myself over and over with the same clips. I appreciate your girl chat with these vulnerable topics! In Jesus' name, heal Kian where she needs it most and strengthen her so that she feels even stronger than she's ever felt. Thank you for your peace and infinite wisdom, Lord.
lollll 😅 it was toooo much. Thanks for the prayers
Thank you for sharing. You feel like a friend. You remind me so much of my sister. I value your transparency and your vulnerability. Thank you 🤎🫶🏻🙏🏻
Hi! I am a pelvic floor PT and talk with my patients about the trauma from birth and intimacy often. I would recommend looking into CFT (crainosacral myofascial therapy), finding a massage therapist or physical therapist/ OT, that is trained in this specifically. CFT can help relieve the tension wherever you may be holding it, and with that come our emotions, too! People often cry afterwards or during the session as things surface. I’ll be praying for you!! 💚
Kian, you are so brave! Praying for you sis. ❤️
Breaking free by Beth Moore!!! Such a good Bible study to do with women! ❤
Kian, I LOVE YOU SOOOOOOOOOOO MUCH!!! thank you so so much for sharing this! You are SOOOOOO beautiful inside and out! 🧡
✨You are a bright light, Kian!✨ Thank you for the hope that you give to countless lives! My prayer for you tonight is that God will lavish you with whatever it is that you need to fully heal from lingering trauma. Satan’s lies are the worst! Remember who(se) you are! ✨💖✨
Thanks for the video! Trying to conceive currently and glad to be able to learn from those who are a season ahead of me.
Thank you for sharing your struggles. I had multiple partners before getting married and getting saved. I had to repent for each one, break off soul ties and covenant ties with each one. The Holy Spirit will lead you.
Kian I love your videos! You will be my “one person” I’ll be praying for this week🩷🩵🤍
You are so real and honest and brave … thank you
Aw I’ll be praying for you Kian! God absolutely heals and restores.🤍
I feel you girl! Generally speaking wanting to share with you Mark de jesus. He talks a lot about mental health and OCD and overthinking and perfectionism in the context of the bible and Gods love. Maybe this can be a resource for you, and anyone reading this. He is helping me soo much and my therapist when I can't afford another session haha and he does it with so much humor too, which really helps!
“Your eye is like a lamp that provides light for your body. When your eye is healthy, your whole body is filled with light.”
I’ve missed your sit down videos! ❤
The crying to hysterically laughing mood swings are sooo tough girl, happens to me every period😅🤣
hahaha it's toooo much 😆
new favorite video of yours -- thank you for being so honest.
Kian thank you for your honesty of struggling with sex postpartum, I have been a follower for years on your channel ane rememember your testomny video when you posted it. I am also a wife of 6 years now, 3 perfect babies and I still feel the creeping of past sexual regrets but I can say it does get lighter to carry, not easier but less of my cross to carry that the lord is healing and repairing the parts that were left outside of my marriage covenant. I will keep you in prayers also ❤ The devil can scrap but the lord has won!
Aww bless your heart Kian! Give it to the Lord and he will sustain you! Also from a physical perspective please consider pelvic floor physical therapy, there may be some physiologic reasons that are contributing to your issues with postpartum sex. Scarring can cause more pain and then cause anticipation of pain which might be contributing to some of your issues.
Kian, I can’t tell you how similar our stories are and how much we are literally in the same boat right now in terms of sexual & physical healing. I wish we could get coffee & chat & cry & pray together lol I know the suffering you are experiencing in the waiting. Love & hugs xoxo ❤
My postpartum anxiety was absolutely crippling 😢
Been single 8 years now. I definitely need to change my mindset. I mean I try to that’s what I do.
Girl, you are beautiful, loved, and cherished by Abba💓 2 Corinthians 1:4
The Joy of the In-between by Ashley Hettherington would be a great book club study
My husband and I had major struggles after our first born. Our sex life was awful. He thought I hated him. His self esteem was destroyed. I felt like the worst wife ever. I eventually got on levothyroxine which helped me but just know you’re not alone.
My name is Gabriela, and I do believe that the Lord is the Lord is in the process of healing and will Heal you and will do so at any time. Just keep praying and believing because, it can happen!🫶🏻
Please be praying for me! It is my first pregnancy since a second trimester lost with our first. Please pray for a healthy baby and my peace and trust in God ❤️
The end 😂❤
Now and Not Yet - Ruth Chou Simons
Is SUCH a great book. Read it at my women’s ministry group . So good
Pray request to have answers to body aches. May God heal my aches and pains so I can enjoy upcoming trips this summer, and not have days wasted being housebound from headaches, neckaches and backaches
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Thanks for sharing Kian - maybe you could share your health journey with us if you are struggling with content. 🙏❤️
Gospel in 10 words - Paul Ellis ❤️
I highly recommend the book / study: Untangle your emotions by Jennie Allen :)
About asking for a prayer..
The hardest for me right now is baby girl due any day now and she doesn’t have a finished room, she has all the necessary things but it’s nothing fancy, her room is still like a construction site and we can’t see the way financially to go forward… God has blessed us above and beyond and we can OWN a house, but making it feel like a home is something I really struggle with… at the moment we don’t have an oven and we have 0 “aesthetic”, and honestly I’m trying to stay as grateful as I possibly can, but letting go of control and order is something I always struggled with, and with all the uncertainty I feel like I’m drowning in endless “what ifs”
This was so good!!!!!
Healing emotionally is always a process. Christian Counseling could really help with this. God ordains sex through marriage. He can take away all your shame, guilt, and embarrassment once you are ready to give it all to him. Knowing who you are and realizing your self worth through Christ is life changing. ❤ God wants you to have a great sex life with your husband. You can’t change the past but that’s why we thank the Lord for Jesus’s sacrifice for our lives. I’ve never been in your specific position but to overcome some sexual abuse as a child I did EMDR therapy and that’s honestly the only therapy that helped emotionally. I am currently undergoing pelvic floor therapy as well for my body’s response. Sometimes we have to rebuke certain thoughts in the name of Jesus and ask the Lord to replace it with his Holy Spirit. The devil will use anything he can against you. Remember the armor of God and use them to defeat him. Wishing you all the best.❤
🤍💛 love this!
Also, im praying that you feel a breakthrough of healing from the top of your head to your tiptoes in Jesus name! I plead the blood of Jesus over your mind, will, emotions & that you feel immense JOY flowing from your belly into your whole life. Bless you 🤍💛
First of all you look so beautiful 😍 never looked better. Secondly thank you so much for sharing ❤ Body image was my biggest struggle. I really struggled with my body imagine after having my first, I actually wanted to cry everyday looking at myself specially because I realised I used to have so much pride in my previous body and was obsessed with working out which I believe was consequence of all the bullying during my childhood. I tried to start working out and struggled as I saw myself losing weight but it was so slow and the body shape being totally different 😢 My first is now 2 years old and I just had my second and I am being much kinder to myself now though I am still trying to lose the weight from my first 🫠
I pray God heals you ❤ All of us have a past that tries to hunt us down sometimes but nothing is impossible to the God that we serve. We will be healed and restored in Jesus Christ Name
I too struggle to enjoy sex. I have a really tough background sexually that involved addiction and impure relationships and I’m also in recovery. I have 2 children and I go to pelvic floor physical therapy to help with my postpartum recovery. I don’t have the same story as you but sometimes I feel like things will never get better, but it will!❤
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I am in a season of waiting for a baby. I have had 2, possibly 3 pregnancy losses in the last 12 months. Could use some prayers 😢. It’s been so hard and Satan is getting in my head.
❤love you!!!!
Hi!!!
Love your videos!!!
Keep up the good work!!!
I’m really struggling right now. I’m trying to pray and read my Bible but it’s really hard to right now. I’m dealing with church hurt at the hands of leadership in my church (no I wasn’t sexually abused but I do believe that I was emotionally manipulated) and no one understands. I love my church but when you get hurt by the people in it (or specifically five people, including leaders) it’s hard to go to church. I don’t know how to handle it. I can’t necessarily stop going to church because it’s a requirement for living with my parents. Do you have any tips on how to prioritize God in hard seasons??? That along with prayer would be greatly appreciated!!!
praying for you as I listen and then I wonder what our Heavenly Father must think. Pure. He sees you and thinks of you as pure. Then I think of how you are a new creation, but not in your mind and your body- therefore there is some easy triggers for trauma. But in Romans chapter 12 we see renewing your mind, I believe there can and will be a deep renewing of your mind to align it with the thoughts God has for you, and about you. Wish you could come and talk to my teenagers at church, you have such a testimony. You are also glowing , love you sister
I recommend the book
Fighting for our friendships by Danielle bayard Jackson
Thank you for sharing your life.
I pray to find a Christian group of friends one day.
❤️❤️❤️
I'm looking for a place to buy as I have received notice that my landlord needs her place back by end of the year.
It is a secular book, but is 2nd to the bible of things that have transformed my life. The Queen's Code, by alison armstrong... I recommend it to every woman.
Have your friend join the Year of the Bride Fast!
Same
I was a virgin when I married and I hate sex and have a very negative relationship with sex. I feel degraded and I notice my husband likes me more when he doesn’t get it so I work hard to be obedient in my marriage covenant and keep sex regular but that doesn’t mean it’s easy for girls who waited either. It’s probably a result of our fallen world that most women don’t like sex!
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Praying for Him to restore your enjoyment and confidence in sex!!! ❤🙌🏻😊