Why We Are Going To Homeschool Our Daughter (Ep. 5)

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  • Опубліковано 27 вер 2024
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КОМЕНТАРІ • 222

  • @loveanjelly
    @loveanjelly Рік тому +120

    I think no matter how much time flies, bullying can have a lifelong impact. It's so much more than just trying to "get over it", no matter how light or severe that person was bullying.

  • @cynthialedesma7466
    @cynthialedesma7466 Рік тому +5

    The way Gabe asks reassurance from Jess as she explains what she went through, truly shows how he validates how she feels it’s so cute 🥰🙂💕.

  • @Szepedaxo
    @Szepedaxo Рік тому +135

    I’m actually so shocked that you both sided with the bully 🥺😔 Jess got anxious remembering something that happened 10 years ago and that’s so valid! Just like Sam was valid in her emotions. Doesn’t matter how long ago something happened, it can still be triggering. The bully’s apology was probably genuine but Sam’s healing process is hers alone and she doesn’t have to accept someone into her inner space if she’s not ready for that.

    • @jordiis
      @jordiis Рік тому +1

      Age is also a big factor in this

    • @carolinec31
      @carolinec31 Рік тому

      @@jordiisnot really, the girl in the story was 17/18 in high school. Jess was feeling some type of way when she was remembering something from nearly a decade ago as well

    • @jordiis
      @jordiis Рік тому +3

      @@carolinec31 the girl was 9 when she was getting bullied though and so was the „bully“

    • @racheltherese4161
      @racheltherese4161 Рік тому +1

      I agree!

    • @carolinec31
      @carolinec31 Рік тому +3

      @@jordiis ohh okay nvm I see what u mean now, yes the girl in the story was younger. But idk I think it depends on how sensitive the person is

  • @thedrasc1465
    @thedrasc1465 Рік тому +12

    It's also been about 10 years since I was bullied, and this podcast gave me a heavy feeling in my chest. Those feelings definitely linger

    • @cathirodrigo2933
      @cathirodrigo2933 6 місяців тому +1

      Yes the feelings of hurt never goes away bc Satan doesn’t want you to forgive. It’s such a HUGE battle!! I’ve learned when those thoughts come up to start praying & asking God if He wants me to learn something from that or if it’s just Satan to rebuke him from my thoughts. Hope that helps. ❤

  • @saadiaziakhawaja
    @saadiaziakhawaja Рік тому +148

    Gabriel's parents have raised him so well!

    • @frankielou
      @frankielou Рік тому +4

      Not with him taking up acting roles that kiss other women

    • @CockneyRebel1979
      @CockneyRebel1979 Рік тому +2

      @@frankielou Jess knows it's just a job, I'm sure.

    • @freedom4063
      @freedom4063 Рік тому

      ​@@frankielouis he doing it? I think it gross to o

  • @sarahjost9826
    @sarahjost9826 Рік тому +20

    Best episode yet. Really cool conversation and a worthy topic that I feel like can get brushed over often because it feels like 80% of the internet is bullying or negative so therefore none of it is cause it’s so normal if that makes sense. You guys are really hitting your stride in this new podcasting space and it’s awesome! I love tuning in each week!

  • @glendass5
    @glendass5 Рік тому +17

    Jess is such a kind-hearted and genuine person idk how anyone can be mean or hate her! 🥺 Love you guys! 🫶

  • @abeerasrar
    @abeerasrar Рік тому +8

    Grief and trauma of any cause doesn't go away with time just a reminder to every person it needs acceptance and most precisely some kind reassurances.

  • @Justjaycee88
    @Justjaycee88 Рік тому +50

    I got bullied in highschool! It’s horrible and to this very day I have low self esteem because people called me ugly! One of my bullies became a teacher and another became a psychologist how interesting

    • @Justjaycee88
      @Justjaycee88 Рік тому +2

      Thank you so so much I really needed to hear this!! I really need to start believing in myself more !! 😭

  • @cassandraang105
    @cassandraang105 Рік тому +5

    Even after more than 10 years, I still can remember all the flashbacks during my secondary sch days. I don’t dwell much on it but whenever it comes to topic like this, it is something that I felt confident and comfortable to share. Really appreciate your sharings J&B! ☺️❤️

  • @Carolinee1045
    @Carolinee1045 Рік тому +140

    Saying this with love as someone who has watched you both for years. I think the rhetoric around “was it bullying or was it abuse?” and “was it physical bullying?” is very dangerous. When you are bullied in your formative years, it forms new belief patterns and habits that can be detrimental to someone’s life and mental health. Regardless of whether or not it was physical. That is why saying something as in “it’s been ten years” doesn’t mean as much when the bullying took place during those formative years. This is often when triggers are formed.
    It is also very possible and oftentimes much more healthy to forgive without allowing that person back into your life, or at least not giving them 100% access. You can wish someone well whilst protecting yourself. Forgiveness upon others is not a tool to do further self-harm and destroy your own boundaries. Seeing the language in the comments that ‘God probably wasn’t on Sam’s mothers side because of the family blow up’ is also super dangerous. Everyone in the family deserves to put up boundaries. Whether that means the girlfriend cannot come to Sam’s house or Sam cannot come to the cousin’s house.
    There is too much talk of “how bad was the bullying?” How can anyone determine that scale? If it permanently impacted the person, it was bad. We don’t need to ask people to defend how much bullying was too much for whatever reason.
    Again, I think this is something important to keep in mind. I have been enjoying the podcasts so far, and I’m happy to see y’all thriving. This particular episode just really surprised me, and the conversation it initiated in the comments was equally as surprising.

    • @KrislonR
      @KrislonR Рік тому +13

      Well said. This episode is harmful.

    • @cmotasilva
      @cmotasilva Рік тому +8

      Couldnt agree more 🙏

    • @ella62
      @ella62 Рік тому +5

      Love how you worded it!

    • @schokoladendonut
      @schokoladendonut Рік тому +2

      👏🏼👏🏼

    • @ophiliagrace23
      @ophiliagrace23 Рік тому +8

      100% agreed! Time doesn't always heal. No matter how long it's been, the impact can still be triggering, and the trauma can still be present. So the idea of "its been 10 years, one should get over it" is a big NO for me. The same way Jess still feel anxious over a bullying event many years back, the same way Sam too feels uncomfortable being around her bully. Can't be biased here. Getting bullied 10 or 15 years back or even longer or shorter, this duration can't be the judge of when a person gets over it, or heals, or can be in the same room with the bully, or feel anxious narrating the story. Bullying unfortunately causes a very lasting wound. We have to be careful on the comments we make on behalf of other people's situation and not come across as invalidating. Can be very harmful considering that you are two very influential people. I say this with love, I've watched you guys from the beginning of your journey, I'm sure you will take this well.

  • @username41938
    @username41938 Рік тому +5

    All trauma is stored inside you. Thinking of the situation and getting anxious is bringing up all past emotions you likely felt then. The brain has no idea this memory is “in the past” it believes it to be a current threat, especially if you haven’t resolved this trauma. Just because it was 10 years ago- your body keeps the score!

  • @migmfreitas
    @migmfreitas Рік тому +12

    25:05 this was 10 years ago... Now this is how the first girl from the reddit post was feeling about having someone come to her home!

  • @Nxg108
    @Nxg108 Рік тому +20

    I think ultimately forgiveness or not, my home will forever be a safe space for my kids. I would of dealt with the first situation not by dismissing my kids feelings and telling them to get over it. And instead would have asked my kid if there was more that i didn’t know or if it didn’t actually stop when i thought it did. Then guided them through the processing of the hurt. Processing may result in forgiveness but doesn’t mean access. Your kid might not like the idea of having to see their bully outside of school in their safe space, around the family or at their home. I would of asked someone else in the family, if they could host it at their place & that i would still be helping, just to keep my home a place my kids will never feel uncomfortable in. And that way giving my child an out because its not in their space.
    Just like how jess was taken back to an event 10 years ago, bullying is mainly the psychological effects that stay with the person, so clearly Sam is still effected by it. My personal experience and a lot of ppl i see online, schools suck at handling bullying. So for the school to actually act on it made me think it was actually quite serious, i think Emily also apologising a second time years later is also telling. Did she stop bullying but what she started stuck and other kids continued it and does Sam ultimately blame her for it / is Emily conscious of that and apologising out of guilt. The jokes or labels probably stuck or stunted sam’s self expression, at the same time she watched Emily get to be popular and enjoy her high school experience. I think at the end of it all Sam responded in fear to someone she doesn’t have trust for or feels uncomfortable with being around her family. Was probably upset and caught off guard that her mum who knows about it all being so okay with it , & seemingly to a teenage hurt sam taking her bully’s side. At the end of it all Sam probably will walk away from this situation feeling like Emily once again continues to be at the centre of hurt for her, because her family have taken Emily’s side.
    I think Sam should take it in stride not go to the family event and reassure herself that at least she doesn’t have to hang out with them. If they don’t work out, its whatever & if they do & they get married, realistically as she gets older has kids she wouldn’t have seen her cousin as much as immediate family anyway. Low key if outsiders ask about it the story is, you were uncomfortable with your bully she married into your family and you keep your distance for peace.

    • @thelittlesoldier5139
      @thelittlesoldier5139 Рік тому +1

      You are amazing, I felt hard when Sam mom's said "you need to get over it", trauma is trauma, she doesn't need to, it'd be healthier to find a way to safely deal with it. It all goes back to mental health and what a safe space is. If we talk about a trauma about sexual harrassment I'm 100% sure no matter the age no one would push their own child to deal with it or "just get over it" no matter how long ago it was, it's a personal process, but just being there for your kids and keepipng a safe place is what is best. I'm sad Sam's family would go back at the bad things she used to do, as if those were the reason why she got bullied, to even things out kind of, or just to dismiss what she was feeling.
      I know family is important, but they are also people and can be hurtful, sadly, not everyone's family is a safe place.

  • @madisonbailey7978
    @madisonbailey7978 Рік тому +5

    I was homeschooled until 4th grade and i feel like that was a perfect amount of time to grow emotionally and mentally with a healthy faith-based way! It created a very strong foundation in me and prepared me so well for a physical school. It was a private school but i still feel like i already knew who i was and knew how big God was. So if homeschooling ever seems daunting, know that they don’t have to be homeschooled forever! I love the idea of homeschool though :) you guys are going to be amazing parents

  • @joannaaracel8432
    @joannaaracel8432 Рік тому +3

    Jess, your parents deserve an applause 👏🏻 because they have raised the most wonderful human being ever. Your honesty more than anything is what makes you so relatable. And you have so much and are one of the most humble woman to be on this platform. More than anything may you continue to grow in Christ as you have today. Been a follower since a little before your engagement to Gabe and my you have grown🥰 God bless you and your family a ton!

  • @amy.usherwood
    @amy.usherwood Рік тому +2

    I'm 36 and Jess, I totally resonate with you on having an anxious, emotional reaction to talking about my bullying. Retelling and relaying something that was so traumatic for us brings us back into the feelings and emotions, and it's like we're reliving it. Reliving it, but not controlled by it any longer! Thanks for sharing your experiences:)

  • @Kimmiejo5
    @Kimmiejo5 7 місяців тому

    People who bully in their friend group really enable each other and truly enjoy every minute of it. This has happened in and established adult corporate work group where a new employee comes in and for no valid reason, except they feed off each other and want to bully someone out of the office. This happened for nearly 11 years. Jess I can see why it brings up anxiety when you bring it up because it never really leaves you 100%, even when you are in a better place. This can happen to anyone…very sad that even some adults have nothing better to do. Good topic.

  • @Kimmiejo5
    @Kimmiejo5 7 місяців тому

    People who bully in their friend group really enable each other and truly enjoy every minute of it. This has happened in and established adult corporate work group where a new employee comes in and for no valid reason, except they feed off each other and want to bully someone out of the office. This happened for nearly 11 years. Jess I can see why it brings up anxiety when you bring it up because it never really leaves you 100%, even when you are in a better place. This can happen to anyone…very sad that even adults have nothing better to do. Good topic.

  • @torrencel.2662
    @torrencel.2662 Рік тому +9

    There was one bully that came into my neighborhood & always started fights with all guys my age. This was from age 8-12. He always would act crazy & it made us fear him. Where I grew up you fought or got beat up. Once people knew you weren't a push over, they wouldn't bother you. One day the bully shoved my younger brother down and I hit him & bust his lip. I was still afraid but I didn't back down that day. He was the only person I ever lost a fight to. He backed up and saw the blood flowing from his lip and he attacked. I ducked & hit him again. He then bust my lip but I still didn't stop. We went toe to toe and I beat him for the first time. As word got around the neighborhood he wanted to prove it was a fluke so we fought twice more, the same day, and I beat him again. All the older guys cheered and said that they were so tired of us letting this kid bully us. They said it was about time one of us stood up to him. That was the last day we ever saw the bully! He quit coming around. I grew up in a Christian family too but the rule was look out for your brothers & my dad said always walk away unless someone tries to back you in a corner. Then you better fight your way out.

  • @tylerstanway4559
    @tylerstanway4559 Рік тому +4

    Such a great episode. Thank you for having the courage to speak out and share your own experiences 💛 I hope that anyone who is going through a tough time is able to see this and feel comforted and supported

  • @addibvideos
    @addibvideos Рік тому +1

    I went to public school until 6th grade, then was homeschooled until I graduated HS. I was so mad at first about being homeschooled, but I ended up loving it. I went to multiple co-ops and I ended up getting to start working pretty much full time because I only went to school a couple days a week. Homeschooling opens the door to so many opportunities and the freedom to do more things. I'm so glad people are finally realizing that.

  • @beccabobbitt4965
    @beccabobbitt4965 Рік тому +5

    Can y’all talk more about other reasons for homeschool, your plan for home school, and your specific plans for how you will structure it?

  • @Sharanya1357
    @Sharanya1357 Рік тому +1

    The same thing, about repeating clothes, happened to me too at school. It does feel silly but then those memories are still stuck with me. Because I stood in the middle surrounded by the others laughing at my clothes!! This made me so insecure that I used to go through so many clothes, including my mother’s clothes to wear to the school, so that I don’t get judged or laughed at!!

  • @erinchildress2950
    @erinchildress2950 Рік тому +3

    I LOST it when you guys started talking about the “dobbed on” thing 😂😂😂😂 that was hilarious

  • @edinagentz8241
    @edinagentz8241 Рік тому +2

    Ohh Jess, please don’t apologize for being real and vulnerable, I totally feel you, even when feeling for the ones that are vulnerable. Thanks for sharing this with us. And i am truly sorry for those people that bullied you, they mush have been really jealous. Because you are gorgeous and have the nicest body! God bless you

  • @kimchaffa
    @kimchaffa Рік тому +4

    Thank you so much for the vulnerability. I related so much to Jess' story. I was bullied as a teenager too and it left a lasting effect on my life.
    Thanks for another amazing podcast!

  • @gisellez2958
    @gisellez2958 Рік тому +3

    i genuinely look forward to seeing your content! jess gives me this calm abundant energy and gabe complements her so so well with his kindness and humor ❤️ thank you for doing what you do!

  • @mamimalista7924
    @mamimalista7924 10 місяців тому

    I love all the good advise at the end. I tell my kids whenever they feel hurt by someone, “you can’t control their sin, but you can choose to not be controlled by their sin.” We don’t have to react to people’s sin, we can learn to respond in a way that is God glorifying.

  • @thaisass6024
    @thaisass6024 Рік тому +1

    I'm not all the way through but I had a few really crippling (lifelong) experiences where someone really close to me would tear me down and want me to stop being certain things and then go on to copy it. I could never understand why. I would prefer that she mean what she was saying and that be her honest opinion rather than do that.
    A year ago, a therapist explained how awful jealousy really is. I didn't want to believe that was the case because I genuinely love seeing everyone shine in their own unique light. But you Jess are so pretty, sure pure and so kind - a triple "threat" in some ways (even though I'm sure you don't like the idea of being a threat at all) but hearing the shirt copying story, it was 100% that. I'm so sorry for what you went through💛

  • @natalieohlsson7777
    @natalieohlsson7777 Рік тому +2

    Jess I really appreciate that you allowed us to walk through that vulnerable moment of anxiety that you were having. I think sometimes it is so healing for people to be in the moment and experience that with someone and understand it’s just a part of life sometimes, especially when it comes to traumatic events. God bless you.❤

    • @SovaMukherjee-g5b
      @SovaMukherjee-g5b Рік тому

      Bullying anyone intentionally is always wrong and selfish...it can't be a part of life!bullies are always insecure, selfish and jealous!!

    • @SovaMukherjee-g5b
      @SovaMukherjee-g5b Рік тому

      In today's modern educated world how and why anyone or anybody bullying...why!!??ok to stop a bully first communicate with them with love then if they dnt listen then ignore then if they constantly wants to harm you then discuss this issue with your parents and then bring ur parents and they should inform teachers! if that does not work, sometimes teachers involved with that bully or group and support them to do wrong for obviously no reason just for their insecure nature..than share this with online and if possible if that's an cyber bullying than collect information or proof bt otherwise your parents should communicate with bullies mom and dad bt if again this happen then give them(bullies)a big slap,beat them with cricket 🏏 bat😂
      Really I mean it❤

  • @andreareyes7080
    @andreareyes7080 Рік тому +2

    Thats crazy how people would say Gabe married the wrong person, clearly he & Jess were made for one another 💛 Can’t wait for the merch!

  • @lauramartin12
    @lauramartin12 Рік тому +2

    Jess never apologize girl!! I really appreciate the honesty. You guys both have such good heads on your shoulders, you guys bring such a refreshing perspective to the world. Thanks for being such great role models :)

  • @natevaG85
    @natevaG85 Рік тому

    Love this topic. One big thing that I have learnt through experience as I have a younger sibling who experienced high school bullying 20 years ago is that you can't get through this alone. If you have been bullied at school or at any age, it can certainly have a lasting effect, you cannot always heal with time. You need to get professional help to help you understand what has ocurred and to give you tools to grow from this unfortunate experience. People that do nothing about it can grow into adults that use this as an excuse to continuously play the victim card and treat people like trash and even bully you, use aggression and use their childhood experience as an excuse for their behaviour. Get help, break the cycle. Please.

  • @cherylstockdale9111
    @cherylstockdale9111 Рік тому +115

    Bullying can have a lifetime effect on a person. I had a lisp at high school and the bullying I received still impacts me to this day. 😢

  • @ophiliagrace23
    @ophiliagrace23 Рік тому +3

    Time doesn't always heal. No matter how long it's been, the impact can still be triggering, and the trauma can still be present. So the idea of "its been 10 years, one should get over it" is a big NO for me. The same way Jess still feel anxious over a bullying event many years back, the same way Sam too feels uncomfortable being around her bully. Can't be biased here. Its okay for Jess to still feel uncomfortable for being bullied many years ago, its okay for Sam to feel uncomfortable too. Disappointed at Sam's family. I'd never let my child be in the same room as their bully even if its been years since the bullying event, unless my child has made their own decision to forgive, let go, or are not affected by it anymore, I'd respect and prioritize my child's boundaries any day!! Getting bullied 10 or 15 years back or even longer or shorter, this duration can't be the judge of when a person gets over it, or heals, or can be in the same room with the bully, or feel anxious narrating the story. Bullying unfortunately causes a very lasting wound. We have to be careful on the comments we make on behalf of other people's situation and not come across as invalidating. Can be very harmful considering that you are two very influential people. I say this with love, I've watched you guys from the beginning of your journey, so I do feel a bit free to be open about how I feel with regards to your comments in this Podcast. You guys are wise, I hope you will speak wisely. I'm sure you will take this well. ❤

  • @SamuelHiggins
    @SamuelHiggins Рік тому +3

    I have been loving these podcasts! Thank you so much guys for all that you do! Been watching your videos for a number of years and love to see how much you've all grown in life in wisdom. God bless you both!

  • @samanthaadams2576
    @samanthaadams2576 Рік тому +2

    It’s very normal to have a physical reaction when talking about something traumatizing.. there is still space for healing those parts of us that were hurt, if that is the case ❤

  • @kirstbecca
    @kirstbecca Рік тому +3

    This was such an amazing podcast. You are such amazing humans and parents and have the best values. Definitely the best podcast and episode i’ve listened to. Keep being the kindest souls! Love you guys!💗

  • @HeyItsHayleigh
    @HeyItsHayleigh Рік тому +4

    Now that my daughter watches Bluey, I get most of Jess’ Aussie slang haha I feel so cultured

  • @bellabloom8850
    @bellabloom8850 Рік тому

    just for the record i found jess’ singing videos before i had heard of gabe so when yall became public in my mind he was the lucky one for choosing the prettiest, most talented, girl best fit for him 🤗

  • @graciaclifford90
    @graciaclifford90 Рік тому +2

    Omg carindale hahahaaaa you're missing out Jess 😂😅 Great video, thanks guys!

  • @auzangelful
    @auzangelful Рік тому +2

    I think that the people who are responsible for the bullying or teasing are insecure or jealous people. In your case, with your relationship, with people telling Gabe that Jess is the wrong girl etc are probably so envious that you two have a strong respectful marriage. In my personal experience people who lash out at other people deep inside wish that their life was in a better place. And for whatever reason bullying makes them feel good. I can never understand why everyone just cannot be nice to each other. Hope that makes sense!

  • @danaeman8028
    @danaeman8028 Рік тому

    This podcast is so refreshing and yet calming, love the energy

  • @kamilakasmanova
    @kamilakasmanova Рік тому +3

    Yeeees!!!! I’m goint to prepare dinner and watch this episode💅🏻❤️❤️ love you guys🥰

  • @maryrosegutierrez3116
    @maryrosegutierrez3116 Рік тому +2

    Yes, Wrestle him to the ground!!!
    My husband and I stand by that parenting technique for bullies if it gets too far... but, sometimes kids can't physically stand up for themselves...
    My 8 year old son was being bullied by a girl in his class. It wasn't just him, but she was way worse to him for some reason. This girl had some stuff going on in her home life. I get that that happens and i truly feel for kids who have bad home lives. When our oldest boy was 8 his bully threatened to STAB him with a pencil and my son was like no, but ill fight you if that will make you feel better 🤦‍♀️, they didnt fight and he told me right away and I turned right back around and went to the school to talk to the teacher and staff. They explained his home life was a bit rocky (no details were givin to me of course), but we understood and explained our main concern is still our son's safety no matter the circumstances, and the school kept our son and the other boy safe. Fast forward 10 years to schools now a days....
    Like i said, this girl had some sort of issue at home, i dont need specifics, but she was PHYSICALLY hurting our son and breaking his things. Stomping on his legs while wearing boots when he was sitting on the ground doing a project (she was one the the bigger kids in the class.) , taking his water bottles and throwing them so they got dented and breaking his headphones for testing, etc. His teacher always reported it and messaged me immediately, but her hands were tied and the school staff didn't do much but say "sorry that happened to him, maybe he should avoid her". 🤯 she could have broken his leg! She sought him out. He was bruised for a while. He tried avoiding, he tried telling an adult, and if she were a boy, we wouldn't have been mad at him for physically standing up for himself by this point (pushing them away, punch them in the arm, wrestle them to the ground, yell at them or, you know, settle it like he does with his 3 brothers) BUT, like I said, she's a girl and we teach our boys that boys don't hit girls. We even go so far as to say that no matter what a person may claim as their pronouns, no matter what bathroom they are allowed to be in, if they were born female, you don't hit them. So, he couldn't settle it and had to deal with it the whole year. It was absolutely ridiculous. They wouldn't even put either of them in a different class. Schools are so scared of the repercussions of disciplining a kid, that they do nothing at all to make a kid want to stop being a little... poopy head. I was going to pull him out of that school, but he said he would rather deal with it than leave his brothers and friends just because she was a bully. Which we respected, because it is not fair that he would have to leave because he wasn't the problem. He is the kind of kid who really doesn't like change so pulling him out would really upset him, so we just made sure that when he came home every day that he was ok, and that he was mentally ok and knew he was loved. She eventually stopped hitting him at least, which is why we let him stay. He said he could deal with the rest and my husband and I, although frustrated and not made of $, would replace the little things she broke, got him a lock for his backpack so she couldn't get into it, and things chilled out by the end of the year. He is doing great this new year, but it was a rough year last year.
    We are the kind of parents who understand that every story and situationhave 2 sides and we also double check that our kids take responsibility for being part of the problen if anything ever happens. But his teacher reinforced that he really did just mind his own business and didn't instigate her bullying at all.
    (Just fyi, We also teach our girls that hitting their brothers, or boys in general, just because our girls are upset or something is not ok. Unless they are being hurt, hands to themselves)

  • @abigaledavis
    @abigaledavis Рік тому

    Bullying is really so terrible😢. I had really bad acne from the age of 10 which I was bullied for at school, fortunately for me, I have thick skin so it hurt but I shook it off. There are so many horror stories of young kids committing suicide because of being bullied💔
    It has to stop! I believe it starts at home, we have to show love to our kids, we as parents have to set an example for our kids.
    Be kind🌸show love🌸

  • @megothica
    @megothica Рік тому +6

    hurt people, hurt people

  • @larissashomeinteriors8821
    @larissashomeinteriors8821 Рік тому +13

    I was bullied in grade 9 really badly. It's now 15 years later and I still get anxiety around high-school girls. Sounds dumb but I do
    Also the "hello Matilda" had me cracking up 😂😂

  • @viewer5582
    @viewer5582 Рік тому +2

    The only reason they bullied you is because you were a threat. You're so sweet and beautiful and I'm sure that drove them mad!

  • @IisusLyubitMenya
    @IisusLyubitMenya Рік тому

    I rarely leave and comments but i really wanted to say Jess, you are the sweetheart of youtube. Never pay attention to those who say something negative about you. That is not true.

  • @annalee5254
    @annalee5254 Рік тому +16

    Sam just needed reassurance and support from her family while she’s still healing from a traumatic event, she would of forgiven Emily gradually but now it’s never going to get better for Sam, it’s funny how Emily got the best treatment from Sam’s family. Sam deserves a better family tbh, yes forgiveness is important but sometimes the trauma from an event can last a lifetime, 9 or not, Emily’s parents could of done a better job raising her.

    • @1997Kaffe
      @1997Kaffe Рік тому

      I agree😊

    • @puffylibra
      @puffylibra Рік тому +3

      I agree, I think it doesn’t matter if this happen when she was 9 years old or not because it still affects her and saying it was whatever time ago is invalidating how she feels which if Emily has changed, should have respected Sam’s boundaries especially that she’s the stranger to the family not the other way around and this could have been resolved if they threaded the water lightly by taking in everyone’s feelings but because Sam didn’t do what the family wanted and they’re now blaming her for their actions of dividing the family which is wild and sad.

    • @bearlyplaying
      @bearlyplaying Рік тому +3

      I don’t think she needs a better family. There has to be understanding that Emily is dating Sam’s cousin, if they are serious, she is going to be coming to family events and that’s just what’s going to happen. No one has to be friends with each other but Sam cannot expect everyone to stop and say “Sorry Emily, you were a bully years ago and we can’t have you here.” especially if Emily has truly changed as a person.
      Sam has a lot of growing to do, she’s still impacted by the bullying and does not like Emily, no one should force the two to be friends and no one should make Sam feel invalidated. However, Emily has come into Sam’s life through her cousin, it is also cruel to the cousin to say “You’re girlfriend is not accepted here.”
      It’s going to suck for Sam, it’s going to be uncomfortable, but that’s just reality. Sometimes it’s just the situation and challenge that is placed in your life and you have to face it head on in order to move on (to the best of your capability).
      If I was in Sam’s shoes, I would be uncomfortable and, depending on the bullying, hurt. I have been in situations where I’ve had to be with people who treated me poorly, it does suck. However, if I was in Emily’s shoes, I would also be hurt by the situation.
      Let’s consider all sides to the best of our capabilities, Sam’s, Emily’s, and the cousin’s. No one has to be friends, don’t twist my words.

    • @annalee5254
      @annalee5254 Рік тому

      @@bearlyplaying Oh Sam for sure deserves a better family, bullying can even cost someone their life, sometimes a sorry will never be enough, Sam definitely would of forgiven Emily in her own time but judging from how the family acts, I can see why she didn’t. Emily may be a changed person but sometimes your past haunts you forever, your actions have consequences, yes we all deserve a second chance but clearly it ain’t gonna happen considering how Emily is treated better than Sam (who’s literally their own blood).

    • @annalee5254
      @annalee5254 Рік тому

      @@bearlyplaying and to add to it they keep telling her it happened years ago, again, they invalidate her feelings and look past the trauma she’s been through, they were so quick to even ban Sam from the event but not Emily? That’s weird. Also her cousin tried to pull the “but you did this as a kid” plug on Sam to defend Emily which isn’t even the same thing because harmless pranks and bullying someone isn’t the same thing. So yes, SAM DESERVES A BETTER FAMILY.

  • @katiphillips2897
    @katiphillips2897 Рік тому

    These stories about bullies really boil down to not being able to give forgiveness lot of people hold grudges and hold resentments to people for way too long almost even lifetimes. Forgiveness is for yourself it frees you from all those feelings and living as a prisoner God helps heal and soften the heart to be able to give grace or forgive. I have let go so much from even parental hurts and honestly bullying by one step parent but it was amazing to let that go and forgive and then you protect yourself from any more of that. Although you can move on as long as you feel safe and confident once things can be let go on your end.

  • @cathirodrigo2933
    @cathirodrigo2933 6 місяців тому

    Reddit story #1, forgiveness is key & God was trying to give the parents a key teaching experience. No matter how old a child is the teaching for parents NEVER stops!!!
    Story #2 brother needs to learn to forgive & move on.
    S as far as social media rules, I agree with Gabe, every individual gets one account on any app, if they want to add one it needs to be registered & paid for by that individual. If a business applies for an account they have to pay an initial fee that would include, let’s just say 3 other accounts that are all linked & registered under the main business name. I’ve personally never understood why these rules haven’t been set up. It’s never too late to start enforcing rules!!!
    Obviously I thoroughly enjoyed this video!!! It brought back a lot of emotions & memories & made me think. Thank you for opening people’s eyes. ❤️❤️❤️

  • @kristiekris3401
    @kristiekris3401 Рік тому +4

    It's true, homeschool kids are so much nicer. Plus, they learn to interact with people of all ages.
    My three teenagers attend a coop. Homeschooling is huge in Texas.

  • @dakaraijane3717
    @dakaraijane3717 Рік тому +1

    It sounds like with the first story, a sincere apology was given and forgiveness should have been extended. Unless it was more severe than explained. Not saying they need to be friends, but we shouldn’t negate forgiveness as a principle and I feel these days it is no longer a thing. Forgiveness is hard, it’s not always going to be easy but it’s more for your benefit that the person that wronged you

  • @treesa2020
    @treesa2020 Рік тому +1

    Guys, LOVE the so far so good merch that you're wearing so much! When and where can we get our hands on them ?!?! ❤😂

  • @fikerlove1910
    @fikerlove1910 Рік тому +1

    I have been loving this podcast! It is so so amazinggg❤❤

  • @Itzezyyyy
    @Itzezyyyy Рік тому +1

    Sure everyone’s experiences are different but for those who actually suffer from the bullying today see it as abuse and no form of bullying should be tolerated point blank.

  • @pratyushakoratala8781
    @pratyushakoratala8781 Рік тому

    Such a nice episode, mean people are everywhere you just need to be okay with yourself enough to not let the meanness hurt you and also have good people so that can love youu over the hurt!! On a funnier note 😂 I was having a work call yesterday and my boss was asking me how's work and i ended up sharing so far so good 😂😂😂 and it doens't make sense because adding so good to my answer made me go lol in my head but it was such an immediate response because i had been listening to the podcast before the call so yeah 😂😂

  • @larkspurmoon
    @larkspurmoon Рік тому +1

    Thank you for the podcast. I have realised so many things through this podcast, I used to follow this youtuber, I really loved her, still love her, but one day something about the said youtuber popped up on my feed and it was soo mean and cruel, still I got sucked into it. At the end I said it's only rumours, none of it matters, but at the back of my mind, it was there. I stopped watching her vlogs for no reasons at all, still subbed but wont click on them. But yes, Internet throws huge loads of negativity everyday, all day.
    p.s. I'm gonna re-start watching her

  • @angelmurphy9262
    @angelmurphy9262 9 місяців тому

    If you don't know a kind person all the more reason to be a kind person

  • @LarissaTuong
    @LarissaTuong Рік тому

    I really enjoyed this podcast, getting to hear you guys' opinions is always the best. Sending lots of love to both of you and I can't wait to see the next episodes. P/S: Jess, just know that you're beautiful inside and out no matter what you're going through

  • @KizNic
    @KizNic 11 місяців тому

    This is the video I was waiting on!! 🙏 I was bullied and I got so many gems that I am not even going to try and list them. 😅 HOWEVER I must say this (caveat... I am from the Caribbean so you can look up what these words mean): But dem people fast and outta place!!! How can they tell you that is not the person you should have married? Who are they? Boldfaceness... smh Steups!!... Sigh.. okay... rant completed. 😅 Back to the video 😁

  • @desislavaapostolova1338
    @desislavaapostolova1338 Рік тому +1

    Sundays are my favourite 🫶

  • @soya9287
    @soya9287 9 місяців тому

    maybe make this into a small segment? reading a short story or two related to the podcast episode/topic

  • @patrickgilhuly06
    @patrickgilhuly06 2 місяці тому +1

    “We should make out” 😂

  • @barbarag312
    @barbarag312 Рік тому +1

    i had no problem in middle school but then high school came and i was in the class of the popular girls...they were never mean outloud but you could just tell they were judging and giggling at you, they did it to me and my friend right from the start of school when we literally had never spoken to them. im a big fan girl and the only time one of them verbally made fun of me was when i wore my shawn mendes bracelet i got at his concert which made me stop wear merch to school overall🥲 the girls kinda stopped and i never rlly talked to them but 2nd year this dude came and he tortured us until we finished high school, it was also never verbally, only when he would call us with a "funny voice", and he would throw shit from the back cause we were front of the class and he would just giggle and be an ass with his friends

  • @heavherbaves5079
    @heavherbaves5079 Рік тому +1

    My youngest Mase is starting 7th grade this yr. Rewind to 5th grade when friends of his (so-called friends) from preschool started bullying Mase. 1 posted a pic of a gun (in a group chat) & told him to kill himself. A parent brought it to the principals attention, where I was asked to come in. I was a Flippin wreck over it, especially when there was NO SUSPENSION. 2nd kid wrote his name in her "Death Note" book, again, NO SUSPENSION.
    SAME WEEK, he turned around in the lunch recess line because the girls were screaming to each other, yelling in his ear, he says STFU. I get called in to be told Mase was getting 2 days SUSPENSION 🤬🥺 I pulled him that day from school. District failed him with the "NO Bullying" rule.

    • @larkspurmoon
      @larkspurmoon Рік тому +1

      OMG that's horrible!
      And it's nice of you to understand his point of view and support him.

    • @heavherbaves5079
      @heavherbaves5079 Рік тому +1

      ​@@larkspurmoonThank you. Been homeschooling Him & his 16 yr old brother since then with k12. Our older 2 graduated from there already 😊 Mase has been thriving since 👌

    • @larkspurmoon
      @larkspurmoon Рік тому

      @@heavherbaves5079 Glad to know he's thriving! Good work ma'am ☺️

  • @ammnvx8799
    @ammnvx8799 Рік тому

    Goddd mom advice was the best 😂😂

  • @Anna-hd3rg
    @Anna-hd3rg Рік тому

    Hey I've been watching your channel for a while and really appreciated you sharing your experience. It's great that you've been able to overcome most, and i hope that if there's any remnants left, that too shall pass.
    I just wanted to ask regarding what you guys have been giving as an anecdote of bullying. Regardless of perceived severity (which is subjective), it seemed to be that you guys classified bullying as comments (whether it was individual or in a group, or true or false) that was made that impacted you emotionally. Within that line of thought, though, i did notice that as part of your "so good or no good" in previous episodes, you would make comments that could be perceived as negative regarding celebrities' professional and personal lives / perpetuate comments that has been made by someone else. Given the influence you have, wouldn't that also constitute as bullying? I don't mean to speak definitively, but to me at least, seems like a valid point to at least reflect on. Thanks!

  • @jordiis
    @jordiis Рік тому

    I don’t understand how there are so many people in the comments that are shocked by the fact that Jess and Gabe sided with „the bully“. Those were kids at the time. Literally 9 years old. People learn from mistakes and the „Bully“ apologized. You guys in the comments seem like bitter people that don’t know how to forgive.

  • @katelynpons
    @katelynpons Рік тому +2

    Love all the podcasts lately - so cozy and positive 🤍

  • @nguyentruc6928
    @nguyentruc6928 Рік тому

    Jess , could you please make a video for hair ? And how to grow your hair , please ? Thank you so much ❤

  • @nantucket3215
    @nantucket3215 Рік тому +1

    Brilliant vlog! Looks like Jess has gone to the dark side with AITA😂. Thankfully she brought it around with a positive message regarding bullying. All the best.

  • @mirandamona6053
    @mirandamona6053 Рік тому

    Their intro needs to be "another day another podcast"

  • @carolsomerhalder7
    @carolsomerhalder7 Рік тому +1

    Great episode! Though I do have a different view with the identity-tying part for people that just take privacy seriously that having that out in the world make them uncomfortable but that’s I guess a whole other sub topic of the whole thing

  • @rebeccacaviness255
    @rebeccacaviness255 Рік тому

    I agree with Jess and Gabe,I have a feeling Sam felt worse being the only person not invited then she would of had emily just showed up and she could of kept her distance because the world won't caiter to our feelings we have to be able to be put in situations we are uncomfortable with and make it through them not avoid them because life doesnt work like that as this story points out.

  • @sueothman7550
    @sueothman7550 Рік тому

    How many times has Gabriel said widy tidys in this video 😂😂😂😂

  • @angelmurphy9262
    @angelmurphy9262 9 місяців тому

    For sure those people were clearly wrong . Gabe definitely married the right women.they are a great couple

  • @jenni230
    @jenni230 11 місяців тому

    I haven‘t watched you ages..i forgot how hilarious you are! Love you guys.
    Aside from that of course the topic is not hilarious.

  • @savannahserna4133
    @savannahserna4133 Рік тому

    Like the underwear that Sheldon wears in the Big Bang theory 😂

  • @gosia5961
    @gosia5961 11 місяців тому

    I love the soundoard things that Gabe is making. Jess why you stop him from doing that 😅

  • @FarinaMyrtleRenato
    @FarinaMyrtleRenato Рік тому

    I think this was a great episode… and the analysis of the “Sam” situation was right based on the information given… yea, Jess got anxious talking about he bullying- but would she have had the person banned from an event because she felt insecure? Especially if the person had grown up and apologised… 🤷🏻‍♀️ I’ve also been severely bullied to the point I had to change schools mid grade .. so I see both sides.

  • @garimasingh2316
    @garimasingh2316 Рік тому

    I have nothing else to say but i totally get it jess❤

  • @zsofiadani970
    @zsofiadani970 Рік тому

    Me being 17yo I totally agree

  • @Emilyc13
    @Emilyc13 Рік тому

    As soon as you said 'Ask Fm' i cringed.... the same thing happened to me too. I had completely forgotten about it. It sucked just scrolling through a 'new and exciting' app and coming across your name:(

  • @bd3269
    @bd3269 Рік тому +1

    Omg... I always, always, thought your teeth were absolutely perfect.

  • @daydreamer6814
    @daydreamer6814 Рік тому

    She needs school just because you were bullied doesnt mean she will be. You cant put your fears on your kid. Kids need socialization they need to learn independance. If you guy put your fears on your kid thats wrong. Your daughter is her own person let her be herself you cant make your daughter hate the things you hate.

  • @Breatheintomeandmakemereal
    @Breatheintomeandmakemereal Рік тому

    I’ll be 36 next month and I still have bullies. And they’re all women. I literally hate being friends with women.

  • @CockneyRebel1979
    @CockneyRebel1979 Рік тому +1

    Sorry, but I'm with Sam- (Emily's got no bloody right to be there!) That's like when my sister became bezzie mates with one of MY former bullies- (this bloke called Chris), although, to be fair, Chris and I did eventually bury the hatchet.

  • @kaitlinparsons6556
    @kaitlinparsons6556 Рік тому +4

    There comes a point in time where you should take opportunities to teach kids forgiveness, especially when their bully has apologized and corrected their behavior. It prepares your kid for the future and adulthood. If you go through life holding grudges, it's not Christ-like and create lots of internal conflict, anxiety, and tension.

  • @adasanchez5042
    @adasanchez5042 Рік тому

    I can notice your deeper voice

  • @chloearmstrong9535
    @chloearmstrong9535 Рік тому +3

    Ao early and sorry to hesr that you were bullied but look at where you are now

  • @castillomomma
    @castillomomma Рік тому

    I feel like the ones who were bullied younger, became the bullies in the end.

  • @AlisaBeel-mo4oh
    @AlisaBeel-mo4oh 4 місяці тому

    I don’t want to do public school for my future kids because of the agenda they are putting in school and the values they hold . I want my kids to love and learn about Christ rather than the things they teach in school. I also feel like this gives more time to do family activities because I don’t think kids need eight hours a day in school

  • @BriannaGRC
    @BriannaGRC Рік тому

    I was bullied by this one girl SO MUCH. She once BIT HERSELF then went to the teacher and said I did it. 🙄

  • @bartschlief2574
    @bartschlief2574 Рік тому

    WoW the whitey-tidies story! I had exactly the same thing happening to me, when i was younger😢, but without the wrestling part haha😅. It was pretty rough for me, since I was (and am) a sensitive kid😓 so it made a big impression on me. Sadly the bully kept bullying😖. But a couple years later when i was in high school, i bullied the bully back with a friend of mine😠, but ofcourse thinking back now, i'm not proud of that.😪 but later on that bully never bullied me again🤗

  • @Takoda9721
    @Takoda9721 Рік тому +4

    Y’all are hilarious 😂😂😂 #WhiteyTighties4Life

  • @1997Kaffe
    @1997Kaffe Рік тому

    Love your podcast !😊 i follow you since 2015 .....amazing to see how much we all evolved and developed.❤
    Regarding the story.....I take Sam's side 😊😅