My ex always complained about me not having more but she did not work for a very long time. At times I wouldn't feel well about myself. I'm glad she's my ex and I didn't settle down with her. That was a blessing.
@@johnmartin4641 understandable too, but that wasn't the case. Trust me I was continously earning more over our time when we first started dating. We weren't struggling and had more than we needed. She complained about things but didn't want to improve herself either. Either way I'm glad, dont mind being the provider in the family, but having two in some situations would have definitely helped out. Thanks
Give your husband some grace, remind him daily how much you appreciate him and what he does for you and your family. Find the good in him. Be happy when he comes home, his home is his sanctuary so make it pleasant for him. Please don’t put him down
Yes, that goes both ways because I know she’s also exhausted from taking care of all of their small children. I think it’s also great that she’s taken the initiative to reach out for help in problem solving their issue. I think she got some great advice to discuss with her husband.
@@MsMockingbird06 No, I have to disagree! They both have “jobs” ( he provides and she stays home taking care of the kids). He did NOT call in to a public show to put down his wife’s role, so why does she get to do that to him? It sounds like he is doing his best, why isn’t his best enough for her? I listen to Dave’s show and sometimes I shake my head at his “advice” to these entitled women. We followed his financial advice and are at baby step 6…but everything else he preaches just sounds one sided, side with the women and attack the husbands. Tell me how is this fair?
Why are Dave and this woman discussing this man’s path as if he is a stupid child? It is not this woman’s place to go over her husband to fix him. How humiliating? Why isn’t Dave asking to speak to the husband directly to see what his view is?
@@elizabethjordan825 thank you!!! I can’t imagine calling in and doing this to my husband. Poor guy has the world telling him he isn’t good enough and then goes home to have her do the same.
Literally went through the same thing recently. I was a SAHM for a short while with two kids under two. My husband is working a full time job and it wasn’t enough. So guess what we did? I accepted a part time job that is opposite of his shift. So we rotate between watching the kids and going to work. He works morning and early afternoons and I work til the evening after he comes home. I know it’s not an option for some people, but I have to say I’m thankful its an option for us.
That's real marriage and team. Not often to see or hear of wife and husband working together to get through tough times. So many just divorce these days as if marriages and families are disposable.
I'm in a similar situation too, however my husband travels for work so this wasn't an option for me. Instead I was lucky enough to find a part time job I could bring my kids with me and another I could work from home. I feel like there are always options if you search hard enough.
Travis B I could probably afford a few kids and I’m scared to have one because I wanna give him/her all the best and I don’t wanna have to downgrade my life. My only explanation for low income having more kids besides lack of birth control is that they don’t consider the things higher income people do ( college, private school, trip, clothes, health insurance, etc)
They are not broke. They are house poor. Not lazy. Not irresponsible as far as kids. Kids are a blessing you just have to be smart enough not to buy a house you cannot afford.
Can you imagine this guy coming home from a 12 hour shift dog tired and his wife saying: “Hey I know we need more money so this is what Dave wants you to do.” I’d be freaking LIVID. Get a job woman.
Have you considered that my husband was the one to bring this whole subject up and try to brainstorm how we should fix our situation? I have said I will work outside the home and he said he would rather take a second job for a time than have me work. I didn’t say it in the call but I had a knee injury and Dec. 1 I had to have a huge surgery the doc told me I wouldn’t be recovered fully for up to a year. My husband is always looking out for me and I always tell him how much I appreciate him. This wasn’t spurred by me wanting to maintain a lifestyle. We just wanted to get by and save for him to go to school like he wants to. We’ve made plenty of mistakes in life and are trying to fix them. Just wanted Dave’s opinion. Had no idea how much judgement ppl would sling at me hahah
@Melody Anderson you couldn't afford housing because you needed space for the children you cant afford....now you are cramming them in the same room or moving to a bad school district or dangerous area in other words MAKING THEM PAY FOR YOUR MISTAKES
I love how everyone is ready to volunteer the husband for more work and more hours but when the wife asks if she should work then they are worried about her having "time to herself"
As one who lives in a very similar situation, running the home with four young children there with you all day is work. If she wants a side hustle and can manage the time, then great. If all she can do is what she's currently doing, then that's fine too.
This is awful, laying it all down on the guy's shoulders and talking like is only his responsibility is setting this up for divorce or the guy breaking down and being miserable.
She's using the we have small kids at home excuse so that I can't be pressured into stepping up and helping my husband because I'm my own little princess and stepping up would cut into my me time and I love myself more than my husband, besides my mommy always told me that men are the providers and woman are supposed to stay home at all costs.
My wife presented the same question to me. My argument was: I always help with the kids and cleaning around the house. It's now your turn with helping me with earning income.
@@johnmartin4641 I know it's my job and I do it well. It's her job to take care of the house, and I do my part with caring for the kids and house. So the moment she complains about my job and finances, is the moment she needs to go get a job then. I work a job, then come home and do what she does. I don't complain that she doesn't have a part time job
@@johnmartin4641 this is a very sexist response, as a man I personally will do all I could for a wife to have that choice, but it's an incredibly sexist thing to say that's required of a man
Yep. Nights and weekends. This isn't just conjecture. My wife and I have four kids, now school age, and this is exactly what we did and are doing. Never needed daycare or weird hours trying to work from home.
That’s ridiculous. Any decent husband would give his wife to option to not work. He’s her husband and the father of her children. It’s his job provide for her and the kids.
When your friends that don’t have kids are in their fifties they will all have luxury cars and vacation homes but will still have unfulfilled lives and major regrets.
@@edhcb9359 They might. Or they might be as happy as one possibly can be while those with kids are broke, have unfulfilled relationships with their spouses they only keep around because of the kids and regret it altogether until their death. Kids are not an universal path to happiness, and there are plenty equal or more fulfilling things life has to offer. Depending on the personal preferences, of course.
I have seen quite a few men and women (but I won't lie most of the offenders were female) who want to have the house on the hill and be a stay at home parent. You have to choose one or the other. You can either live poor for a bit and have one parent stay at home or both of you can work and take care of the kids and have more money. Some people I swear just don't want to work but love to spend other people's money
There are some first time buyer incentives with restrictions like staying in the house for some time. You can sell but then have to pay back the incentive.
Don't have children you can't afford to have. Dave acts like giving 10% to a church and having kids doesn't play into the math when you're in debt. Giving to others and kids are a blessing when you can afford do so and a strain and easy way to end up unhappy and divorced when you take on more than you can handle
Exactly, family planning is as important as financial planning. I know most people listening to this believe contraceptives are the devil, but is either that or be miserable
Yes! Having too many kids without the income to do it with, on top of the wife expecting the husband to jump up like Superman and save the day while she gets a free pass because she's a "wife and mom". What a joke!
And not once did he suggest not having any more kids. They shouldn't even have a cat. The man is going to work for a home he never gets to spend any time in.
He never suggests that on his calls. He's very biased when it comes to that. He's against mothers working and against limiting the number of children people have.
@@raymondares8951is that why he employs the mothers of his grandchildren? Yeah, no. He doesn’t advocate for fulltime mothers and NEVER criticizes a dual income household. I wish he did.
She said after paying all their bills, they have a couple of hundred for savings/emergency. Definitely tight, but not like some callers and not "sell the house" yet. Daycare is the only solution for her, even one more kid will open things up easily. She has those skills. (This guy deserves to see his kids at the end of the day, not go to a second job. They would both burn out under that plan.)
She needs to start babysitting to bring in more income. If your husband is working so many jobs/hours and overworking himself, that will affect your marriage and will end in divorce.
@@grizzlybear2702 exactly. Complain that he is always at work and never has anytime for her or the kids. Only way around it is her doing some kind of work but even then she will complain. Cant please a women now a days
@@Thebootyrater exactly. If you expect her to pay half the bills then you have women demonizing you for being a 50/50 man. So you can’t win no matter what you do or don’t do
They're having financial troubles but they keep breeding. Some people never cease to amaze me with their stupidity. And then has the audacity to call in and talk about that the man needs to step up and work even harder.
He is a loser though. He should’ve made better career choices. Any decent husband would give his wife the option to not work. Someone’s got to take care of the kids. A husband and father’s job is to provide for his wife and kids.
How many times are you going to repeat this same comment guy? It seems like they have a spending problem, not an income problem. The husband makes plenty of money for north Texas, seems they got into a house they can’t actually afford.
Depending on the loan and if they got some type of first time home buyer deal or whatever, they might have stipulations on selling within a specific timeframe.
@@Sunny888 my wife worked at a preschool. Took her with. I'd work a split shift. Left the house around 3Am. Went home and watch my child for a few hours, then went back to work in the afternoon once mom was home.
@@Ladyerica54 what you think is insanity is reality. Lifes a struggle and theres no participation trophies. You need to work for it. Now we have great jobs, own a house, and are financially stable. You dont get anywhere playing the victim.
@@alexs3187 I feel bad for you man. You toil away while your significant other lives the good life. I enjoy having a PARTNER in my relationship, we both work hard and enjoy our down time together.
Everybody in the comments is agreeing that the wife is sounding entitled in this entire conversation. What's worse, she's been trying to play victim in this that she can't do anything as the stay at home mom of four kids. First (and as a new home owner from the beginning of this year), the mortgage paperwork states there how much you end up paying monthly. Why were both of them not paying attention to that figure into their budget? Second, if they've been watching/listening to the Ramsey show, they would have known about the 25% rule and not end up with their dream home just to be house poor. I feel like there's just misdirected problem here and it's not really the income problem that they both have but lack of planning (kids, house, finances), but also the lack of communication between the two, and the lack of consideration between the two of them. Hopefully, their marriage doesn't fall apart at this crossroad.
How disappointing!!! What a shame to put EVERYTHING on the mans shoulders. What does he need to do to get us ahead.... No it should be what do WE need to do for OUR FAMILY. This poor guy has gotten with a woman who wants a free ride and give me everything. Get a job and help out!!! It is that simple. Life is hard and it is only harder when families do not work together..
I was that guy 20 years ago. In my case, it was easier for me to work two jobs and have my wife stay home and handle the household. Then, when I was home, everything was caught up and done so we could enjoy family time.
I agree! She needs to help out. But these are the type of women that find men who will marry them and try to provide everything for them. She’s taking advantage of the situation
@@Winnie-Kay it's indoctrinated into many Americans that's how you are supposed to raise your children. They view staying home as not real work. It's embarrassing how many people are brainwashed 😩🥴
@@alexjones28 yes. He definitely encourages engaged couples to get married, but he also tells married people who have absolutely NO business starting a family, that they should put things on hold to start one because he doesn’t preach that finances should prevent you from having children because they’re blessings. I do NOT agree.
Dave is a total blind Christian, so he would never say that to somebody, sadly. Christians are all about making kids regardless of the problems it brings to the world.
This just one of the reasons marriage rate is in the sewers. What happened to "stunning and brave, strong and independent that don't need no man" attitude here? She can do something small from home to help a little or downsize. Ultimately it ends up being "HIS fault" only in her eyes. I'm smelling future single mother with this one.
I have the opposite but I have a girlfriend that’s ok with 24 hours of minimum wage and she treats me very well but I’m afraid due to this lack of confidence a marriage would not be a good idea here.
Why? He’s not doing his job. His job is to provide for his wife and kids and he’s not doing that. I would feel bad for her if she hadn’t made the stupid decision to marry him.
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She can work from home, weekends, nights, opposite shifts. I know a lady that did insurance billing from home and loved it. She could be home and bring in some money.
She could do door dash around dinner time for an hour or two each day after he’s home from work and they’d be in a comfortable savings range of over $1K per month.
@@seankauder9721 And? I'm selling that house for ~$410K and moving to Rural NM, 4bd, 3bth, 2400 sqft on 0.33 acre city lot for $110K. Downside 100 miles to a town of 50K 2021 was right after the real estate rise though.
Ain't no way I'd let my wife sit me down and say "We need to talk about your future career and possibly a second income." Especially if she isn't working.
As a future wife, I’d never do this to my husband. That’s emasculating him. Heck, I’d never approach it publicly like this! Start an Etsy business, use UA-cam for ideas to start a side hustle while the kids are sleeping. There’s so much she can do while being a stay at home mom than just publicly complaining “hubby doesn’t make enough money”. This is sad 😢
I’ll admit whenever I hear stuff about families, and things like this when I hear their incomes I always feel a little bit torn. I’m a single guy no wife no kids and no girlfriend. And I always constantly feel like I need to make more money in order to support a family but I see families like this living off of either roughly what I make or even less incomes. And I always tell myself why can’t I have a family too I might just not making enough money, But at the same time I’m always glad I’m not in the situation where your family is dependent on your salary and you have a lot of responsibility.
There's another option. You DON"T have to start a family. If you want one go ahead nothing wrong with that. Don't feel like you have to. You're looking from the outside in when you see other families. They could in huge debt or they could be paycheck to paycheck or be making a lot of money. It's not a race. I'm in the same boat with no kids, wife, or girlfriend. I'm also 0$ in debt.
Why do people decide to have so many children without being able to afford them? Poor kids. It’s not fair to your children if later on you cannot afford to provide for them properly. I hope the parents can correct this. Also, today one has to consider that we already have significant over population on this earth, global warming etc. Imagine what would happen if everybody decided to have this many kids??
I agree with your first statement, but to not have kids because of climate change is ridiculous. Kids don’t cause climate change. Did you know that every so often the Earth moves slightly closer to the sun and eventually moves back to where it came from? That could explain climate change.
She needs to get a job or sell the house. They sound like they want a lifestyle they can’t afford and will end up divorced in a few years going down this path
Imagine the conversation the night after this call: Dave said you need to make more money. (As they all agreed she didn’t need to earn a nickel to fix this problem)
No she doesn’t. Someone’s got to take care of the kids. Any decent husband would give his wife the option to not work. A husband and father’s job is to provide for his wife and kids.
Any decent husband would give his wife the option to stay home and not work. It’s a husband’s job to provide for his wife and a father’s job to provide for his kids.
@@johnmartin4641 and any decent wife would take what the husband provides and spend it wisely and frugally to take care of the family. She’s unwilling to move out of a home that is double what they can afford. Who knows how else she’s wasting their money. $50k is enough in plenty of places that aren’t big cities like New York or LA
@@johnmartin4641 yes and any decent wife would see her husband struggles and get a job to help him. After all isn’t a wife the help mate of the husband
Wow. This dude is making the median wage $50K is a good income. 1/2 of all workers make less than that. He is an average dude making a decent wage. And they want him to jump from top 50% of all earners to top 15%. They are putting this all on him. She needs to go to work. She could easily go out and find a job making $30K to $35K right now to cover the gap.
@@donnawilde2936 they should have thought about that before they had 4-kids back-to-back. Sorry but you married an average guy making an average wage. You created this scenario. Solution is to do what all average families do, mom goes and gets a job.
Nurse here married to a firefighter, raised 3 kids. Work opposite hours from each other. She needs to get a job. Never understand why this is so difficult for some women. Don't have 4 kids if you can't afford it.
She has a job, she just needs to know how to do her job properly, which will take a little bit of Education, a good housewife can make a little bit of money stretch a long long ways,
I bet I could rework her budget and make it work on 50k I wish they would have went in depth and broke it down.. I bet food is her biggest expense out side the house payment
This is what happens when you have a generation that thinks men should be the bread winner and a generations that thinks everyone should be equal. No one is happy.
@@360undead The problem is many people can’t learn this on their own even with the resources available today. They need guidance. People shouldn’t need to call Dave, but for some reason they can’t figure out how to do it on their own.
Honestly, they may have decided on her being a sahm already, it sounds like they have. Childcare is ridiculously expensive so while providing in home care for others is an option, her affording childcare at this point is not feasible! their ultimate advice of hooking them up with services to explore, and learning about options for part time work is honesty not a bad idea to plan around, downsizing the home is probably their best bet for immediate relief.
Imagine making 50K a year total and being able to own a home in a new development. This entire concept is foreign to me as a Californian. Unbelievable.
I completely agree. I'm a Californian too. Some of these calls blow my mind when I hear how people earning less than me are able to afford brand new homes. Pretty insane. I'm ready to leave CA though. This state has gone down the tubes. And it's only getting worse.
A lot of different highways lead out of California, you know. Just don't export any California Dreamin' political views in your exit and everybody wins.
They are selfish. Funny thing is I was called selfish long ago because I didn't want kids from these same type of people. I reminded some of them. Had to ask one guy why he bought a new gaming laptop after I found out he had to leave work because his pregnant wife and kid was stranded on highway with one of the bald tires flat.
@Ethan depends on the quality of those 80+ years of life. It sounds like their children’s’ lives are miserable and will continue to be miserable because their dad failed.
They never said they couldn’t pay for their kids. Just can’t get ahead. Doesn’t sound like they are getting any aide so they are supporting their kids. Just stuck because they made a poor housing decision.
@Ethan They are the ones self centered and their worse enemy financially. Their standard of living was reduced before buying that house they can't afford. They were good at that.
All the men in the comments talking about how they expect a female partner to work as much as they do, I hope are stepping up and taking care of half of the responsibilities of running a home - example: cooking, cleaning, organizing, laundry, childcare if applicable. I've often seen the bulk of this left to the women in relationships with men, despite the woman working outside the home as well.
FYI my HOA charges people $20k if you sell or rent out your place within a year of buying. They have hardship waivers but the idea is it prevents investors and flippers from out bidding families trying to buy a house.
Children are a blessing from the Lord. My husband is the sole breadwinner, teaches and has a second job tutoring. He is also proud to carry this burden. We have three little ones and homeschool so I’m working zero hours outside the home currently. I used to work two jobs, had the kids in daycare and my husband and I were ships passing in the night. Getting over needing material luxuries made our family free. Parks and libraries require zero money, and siblings provide more entertainment than any toy you could buy. Living modestly is a joyful existence and those of you ranting about them needing birth control need to examine the bitterness of your hearts.
Yay that's exactly my situation granted my kids are older now in high school and middle school. I have never worked since being married but my days are very full. My husband believes it is his privilege to provide as I feel it is my privilege to take care of him. the home and the kids. I have always prayed to God on how to ease my husbands burden and apparently having a home where the kids are happy and he has a proper meal and clean home is my job. I was formerly a software engineer so I've had my career...I don't miss it.
@@TheRealfan1There’s more to life than a great salary. I wouldn’t give up my time with my kids for the world. I’m here when they need me. They’re the priority. Not money.
I don’t know why they want this family to sell $1400 plus utilities is not that much money to live in a house. They’re going to need a huge apartment to fit six people in it
This is absolutely cruel. She stays at home while her husband works and cries that they don’t make enough and wants him to pick up a pt job????? I hope he finds a better partner
I hope she finds a better partner. The guy cares so little about her that he dropped out of school and set himself up for a low paying career. And she’s not staying at home doing nothing; she’s taking care of the kids, which is a very important job.
How can you go to peoples house and babysit when you have your own kids to watch though? People don’t like to leave their kids in an unknown environment unless it’s a legit daycare
If possible, they could look into her opening an at home daycare. My friend did that when she was a single mom as a teenager and couldn't afford childcare for her son. Even in California it wasn't that expensive to get certified and pass the inspections.
@@pigpjsI can’t imagine the cost of insurance and everything that would be necessary. Not to mention, she already has four kids and is probably spread thin.
Welll ya knowwwww, we cannot question her decisions, that would be huh... problematic nowadays... Or you know, question whether or not she had any say in the selection of the house they are in.
Because she shouldn’t have to. Any decent husband would give his wife the option to not work. A husband and father’s job is to provide for his wife and kids. Someone’s got to stay home to take care of the kids. The husband should make more money and he probably would have made more money had he not foolishly dropped out of school. That’s 100% his fault.
Never will forget when I was riding my bike to college and saw a toddler WEEPING to not have their mother drop them off at day care. It’s unnatural but the incompetent men of today would rather dump their kids on someone else and dump their responsibility to provide for the family onto the wife at the expense of everyone else in the family. They would do well to forgo a family altogether and just have male roommates. Not everyone deserves a family.
This comment sounds like you didn’t even listen to the facts. He works-full time, she won’t get a part-time job in the evenings or weekends when Dad is home. Their are house poor, but she isn’t willing to sell (“they won’t let us” 🙄 yeah, ok). This is an entitled woman, not an entitled man.
@@katiejon17Bullshit. You didn’t listen to the call. The husband wants a career change. They’re saving to put him through school without loans. She asked about her getting a job but it seems to be that Dave and his cohost said if she could manage she could. She didn’t say she was unwilling. Heck, she’s in the comment section saying her husband would prefer she stay home with the kids. And they sold the house and got someplace more affordable. As far as your snide remark in selling, they might have been under some contract about not selling. We were for three years, or we paid back assistance. So it’s not an excuse. It could have been a clause she had to sign.
She can have all the kids she wants it's the husband responsibility to care for his family financially there is nothing wrong with a baby only some parents that have them women choose the right person to have babies with he don't need to be a rich man just a smart one
Marry a proverbs 31 woman. This woman is ridiculous. There are plenty of ways to make money from home. Don't marry someone who wants to spend more than they want to earn.
Why sell the house? Even if the payment will go to $1400, where will a couple with 4 children live for less? If you can't afford a $1400 house payment, how will you afford a $1500 or more rental?
Yeah one time, for about 30 years, out of all of human history. It was a fluke. For most people, life in the future is going to be more like 1930 than 1950.
It still is if you make good career choices and don’t do something stupid like drop out of school like this woman’s idiot husband did. I know because I did it for my wife and kids.
Still is If you ignore the news/media and drama. Common to raise two or three kids on $50k where I live including homeschooling. But these people aren't the type that will be calling or needing Dave for anything.
The current and future family income prospect should determine how many kids a couple should have. One spouse is sit at home and another spouse is bread winner is a bad strategy in general in today's economy. This strategy is far more susceptible to risk of getting broke, resentment and domestic violence.
Maybe she could start an in home business as a babysitter for all of the working mothers in her neighborhood or learn how to sew and do alterations. The husband could cut his neighbors yard once he finishes cutting his on every weekend. This could easily add a few hundred to the budget each month.
This was key to my success. I was just aimlessly working dead-end jobs had no idea what my purpose in life was. Someone gave me this book I always talk about in Dave's comment section "Purpose Driven Life" by Rick Warren it changed my life forever.
She can probably baby sit neighbor kids. That’s how my grandma made extra money so she could invest in stocks and property in Seattle in the 80s. It worked out well for her. Best to them.
With four (presumably) young children, it seems unlikely that she can get a job that would make more than childcare for four children. Something like reselling used clothes might be the best she can manage in this situation.
@@HacksawJimThuggin With four kids she's already watching? I'm pretty sure that's illegal in almost all states, to have one person watching five young kids...
so many entitled women who sit at home and feel that their husband should work a second job or even more. why can't she get to work and do something on the side? what's wrong with her
Someone’s got to take care of the kids. The husband should’ve made better career choices so he could support his wife and kids from one job like any decent husband and father would. Any decent husband would give his wife the option to not work. A husband and father’s job is to provide for his wife and kids.
If this woman wants to get a little, she has to give a little. She should be looking for a part time job while her husband looks for a career path towards a higher income.
My ex always complained about me not having more but she did not work for a very long time. At times I wouldn't feel well about myself. I'm glad she's my ex and I didn't settle down with her. That was a blessing.
👍🏻👍🏻
Agree. Want more money? Go earn more, lady.
Why? She’s was pushing you to be successful. That’s a good thing. It was your job to provide for her.
@@johnmartin4641 understandable too, but that wasn't the case. Trust me I was continously earning more over our time when we first started dating. We weren't struggling and had more than we needed. She complained about things but didn't want to improve herself either. Either way I'm glad, dont mind being the provider in the family, but having two in some situations would have definitely helped out. Thanks
@@johnmartin4641 Today’s modern world allows for males and females to provide for themselves. Nobody needs to be henpecked into action.
Give your husband some grace, remind him daily how much you appreciate him and what he does for you and your family. Find the good in him. Be happy when he comes home, his home is his sanctuary so make it pleasant for him. Please don’t put him down
Yes, that goes both ways because I know she’s also exhausted from taking care of all of their small children. I think it’s also great that she’s taken the initiative to reach out for help in problem solving their issue. I think she got some great advice to discuss with her husband.
@@MsMockingbird06 No, I have to disagree! They both have “jobs” ( he provides and she stays home taking care of the kids). He did NOT call in to a public show to put down his wife’s role, so why does she get to do that to him?
It sounds like he is doing his best, why isn’t his best enough for her?
I listen to Dave’s show and sometimes I shake my head at his “advice” to these entitled women. We followed his financial advice and are at baby step 6…but everything else he preaches just sounds one sided, side with the women and attack the husbands.
Tell me how is this fair?
Why are Dave and this woman discussing this man’s path as if he is a stupid child? It is not this woman’s place to go over her husband to fix him. How humiliating? Why isn’t Dave asking to speak to the husband directly to see what his view is?
@@elizabethjordan825 thank you!!!
I can’t imagine calling in and doing this to my husband. Poor guy has the world telling him he isn’t good enough and then goes home to have her do the same.
@@mrs.carter4775 agree
Literally went through the same thing recently. I was a SAHM for a short while with two kids under two. My husband is working a full time job and it wasn’t enough. So guess what we did? I accepted a part time job that is opposite of his shift. So we rotate between watching the kids and going to work. He works morning and early afternoons and I work til the evening after he comes home. I know it’s not an option for some people, but I have to say I’m thankful its an option for us.
Hustler! Love it!
That's real marriage and team. Not often to see or hear of wife and husband working together to get through tough times. So many just divorce these days as if marriages and families are disposable.
I agree. It is a rarity that any guy would be willing to "watch the kids" after a "hard day at work" so the wife can go "have fun at work".
I'm in a similar situation too, however my husband travels for work so this wasn't an option for me. Instead I was lucky enough to find a part time job I could bring my kids with me and another I could work from home. I feel like there are always options if you search hard enough.
You and your husband make an amazing team. blessings to you all.
WHY DID THEY HAVE FOUR KIDS, BACK TO BACK IF THEY HAVE NO MONEY????????
Because she is too lazy to take a birth control pill. Just as the fool is to dumb to put a rubber on.
That’s how low income households are. It’s a statistical fact.
Travis B 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼
Travis B I could probably afford a few kids and I’m scared to have one because I wanna give him/her all the best and I don’t wanna have to downgrade my life. My only explanation for low income having more kids besides lack of birth control is that they don’t consider the things higher income people do ( college, private school, trip, clothes, health insurance, etc)
They are not broke. They are house poor. Not lazy. Not irresponsible as far as kids. Kids are a blessing you just have to be smart enough not to buy a house you cannot afford.
“It would require you to give up any time you have for yourself” well yeah, what do you think the husband is doing
+
It is weird how some women have that mentality, of how to avoid work at all costs. She should do something after the husband gets home.
She needs to get up and work a 5-10. 5pm-10pm at 15 a hour would bring in a extra 20k which would do wonders for the family
Right!
@@elizabetha8565She’s probably doing laundry and cleaning and cooking and Meal prepping and shopping. She’s still working.
"Only women, children and babies are loved unconditionally...a man is only loved if he is providing something."
100%
There are women who will love you for who you are, but they are RARE.
@@ryankelsey9646 nope, at the end of the day men are disposable when the state becomes daddy
@@ryankelsey9646 there are a few of us unicorn types out there.
If that were true, my exhusband would go away.
Can you imagine this guy coming home from a 12 hour shift dog tired and his wife saying: “Hey I know we need more money so this is what Dave wants you to do.” I’d be freaking LIVID.
Get a job woman.
Have you considered that my husband was the one to bring this whole subject up and try to brainstorm how we should fix our situation? I have said I will work outside the home and he said he would rather take a second job for a time than have me work. I didn’t say it in the call but I had a knee injury and Dec. 1 I had to have a huge surgery the doc told me I wouldn’t be recovered fully for up to a year. My husband is always looking out for me and I always tell him how much I appreciate him. This wasn’t spurred by me wanting to maintain a lifestyle. We just wanted to get by and save for him to go to school like he wants to. We’ve made plenty of mistakes in life and are trying to fix them. Just wanted Dave’s opinion. Had no idea how much judgement ppl would sling at me hahah
People love making snap judgments.
@@MO-cu9uc why did you have children you cant afford and then expect everyone to throw you a pity party lol
@Melody Anderson you couldn't afford housing because you needed space for the children you cant afford....now you are cramming them in the same room or moving to a bad school district or dangerous area in other words MAKING THEM PAY FOR YOUR MISTAKES
For real! Heaven forbid this lady find a part-time job for 16 hours a week. Wouldn't that just be awful?
I love how everyone is ready to volunteer the husband for more work and more hours but when the wife asks if she should work then they are worried about her having "time to herself"
Isn’t he a man that should be able to provide for his family?
As one who lives in a very similar situation, running the home with four young children there with you all day is work. If she wants a side hustle and can manage the time, then great. If all she can do is what she's currently doing, then that's fine too.
You must have missed 2:45
They have four kids. Any money she makes will be eaten up by childcare. Makes no sense.
@@andyleo8418 She can work when he gets home, they do not have to work the same shifts.
This is awful, laying it all down on the guy's shoulders and talking like is only his responsibility is setting this up for divorce or the guy breaking down and being miserable.
Sounds familiar.
I’m confused, is her getting a job not an option? I understand that childcare is expensive, but she can work opposite of his shift.
She's using the we have small kids at home excuse so that I can't be pressured into stepping up and helping my husband because I'm my own little princess and stepping up would cut into my me time and I love myself more than my husband, besides my mommy always told me that men are the providers and woman are supposed to stay home at all costs.
So you expect them to never sleep?
@@michaelb.8953 just heard.. kids are five and under so that's an extra $1,200 a month Cry Me a River
@@michaelb.8953 U sound salty, hope u have a family. I feel bad the women in ur life. Pray u don't beat them.
@@michaelb.8953 Grow up child
My wife presented the same question to me. My argument was: I always help with the kids and cleaning around the house. It's now your turn with helping me with earning income.
Why? It’s a husband’s job to provide for his wife so she doesn’t have to work.
@@johnmartin4641 I know it's my job and I do it well. It's her job to take care of the house, and I do my part with caring for the kids and house. So the moment she complains about my job and finances, is the moment she needs to go get a job then.
I work a job, then come home and do what she does. I don't complain that she doesn't have a part time job
@@johnmartin4641 this is a very sexist response, as a man I personally will do all I could for a wife to have that choice, but it's an incredibly sexist thing to say that's required of a man
@@jtowensbyiii6018 life is sexist sucks but men need to work period
@@BMartinsGamingExpo and? You don't get to be a sexist "because"
What happened to the “WE” and “US” in their marriage….
It's all about what SHE wants. I'm glad my wife of 39 years isn't like that. We got to where we are by being about US.
Its only we and us when everything is smooth sailing... once it starts getting rocky then boom start pointing fingers and complaining
The vows are always lies.
@@blackworldtraveler3711 Not in our case. Friday is our 39th anniversary, no debt, paid-off house, and nice retirement investments. Life is great!!
@@jimroscovius
So rare nowadays.
They need to live like poor people, because they are.
LOL, right.
When he gets home, she goes works night job. When kids are all school age, both parents work full time
When does she sleep?
@@superblump87 when she gets home from the part time night job. I have two jobs ATM, today I'm working 8-5 then from 6-10.
Yep. Nights and weekends. This isn't just conjecture. My wife and I have four kids, now school age, and this is exactly what we did and are doing. Never needed daycare or weird hours trying to work from home.
@@superblump87 at night just like he will.
That’s ridiculous. Any decent husband would give his wife to option to not work. He’s her husband and the father of her children. It’s his job provide for her and the kids.
I'm 27 approaching 28 and the financial differences in having kids or not is starting to be apparent in my friend group
💡💡💡💡💡
When your friends that don’t have kids are in their fifties they will all have luxury cars and vacation homes but will still have unfulfilled lives and major regrets.
@@edhcb9359 speaking from experience? Don’t project onto others your failures.
@@edhcb9359 They might. Or they might be as happy as one possibly can be while those with kids are broke, have unfulfilled relationships with their spouses they only keep around because of the kids and regret it altogether until their death.
Kids are not an universal path to happiness, and there are plenty equal or more fulfilling things life has to offer. Depending on the personal preferences, of course.
@@SomnambulistCraze Yes, absolutely speaking from experience as a fifty two year old with a lot of friends my age who chose careers over kids.
“they” told us not to sell within a year of buying…? sounds like she just doesnt want to downsize so she’s making up excuses
I kind of thought the same thing.
I think shes just ignorant.
it sounded like it was the HOA, but it could also have been financing through the builder.
I have seen quite a few men and women (but I won't lie most of the offenders were female) who want to have the house on the hill and be a stay at home parent. You have to choose one or the other. You can either live poor for a bit and have one parent stay at home or both of you can work and take care of the kids and have more money. Some people I swear just don't want to work but love to spend other people's money
There are some first time buyer incentives with restrictions like staying in the house for some time. You can sell but then have to pay back the incentive.
Don't have children you can't afford to have. Dave acts like giving 10% to a church and having kids doesn't play into the math when you're in debt. Giving to others and kids are a blessing when you can afford do so and a strain and easy way to end up unhappy and divorced when you take on more than you can handle
Exactly, family planning is as important as financial planning. I know most people listening to this believe contraceptives are the devil, but is either that or be miserable
Well when you're in debt, you're not giving 10% to church. Also, when you have kids, you build it into your budget.
@@shareworthy5720 some people still give tithes to the church even broke people
@@blackbutterfly233ify he's talking about Dave's principles. Not what a lot of people, generally do.
@@blackbutterfly233ify those are called morons 😂
This my friends, is why you should never be shortsighted when it comes to having children. Only fools rush into a family.
the kids aren't the problem. It's the house
Yes! Having too many kids without the income to do it with, on top of the wife expecting the husband to jump up like Superman and save the day while she gets a free pass because she's a "wife and mom". What a joke!
Agreed.
Not once did he suggest she gets a job! You want to work the man into the ground?
And not once did he suggest not having any more kids. They shouldn't even have a cat. The man is going to work for a home he never gets to spend any time in.
He never suggests that on his calls. He's very biased when it comes to that. He's against mothers working and against limiting the number of children people have.
work is for men. Who exactly is going to look after the children?
@@raymondares8951 Dave's daughter would say the exact opposite, he comes from a different generation.
@@raymondares8951is that why he employs the mothers of his grandchildren?
Yeah, no. He doesn’t advocate for fulltime mothers and NEVER criticizes a dual income household. I wish he did.
Amazes me that almost no one asks themselves how many kids they can AFFORD before they have them.
Yup, you are where you are because you chose to be there.
For real. I feel like I can’t afford kids making $200K/year
people are not ready for that convo
Catholic
I could afford 2 and had twins on the second round. 💩 happens.
She said after paying all their bills, they have a couple of hundred for savings/emergency. Definitely tight, but not like some callers and not "sell the house" yet. Daycare is the only solution for her, even one more kid will open things up easily. She has those skills. (This guy deserves to see his kids at the end of the day, not go to a second job. They would both burn out under that plan.)
She needs to start babysitting to bring in more income. If your husband is working so many jobs/hours and overworking himself, that will affect your marriage and will end in divorce.
She will then complain that he is a workaholic. In fact a woman already complained about that on this channel
@@grizzlybear2702 exactly. Complain that he is always at work and never has anytime for her or the kids. Only way around it is her doing some kind of work but even then she will complain. Cant please a women now a days
@@Thebootyrater who hurt you?
@@finismartin7626 That is so worn out and dose not work anymore
@@Thebootyrater exactly. If you expect her to pay half the bills then you have women demonizing you for being a 50/50 man. So you can’t win no matter what you do or don’t do
Lady if you have financial trouble then Don't have more kids !!!!!!
How can people not know this basic common sense .
It’s the house not the kids.
@@donnawilde2936 kids put a strain when it comes to finances and overall flexibility of working... especially when you have four.
@@donnawilde2936 Of course it's the kids.
@@donnawilde2936 My goodness, have you checked out apartment rents for a 6 person family? I guess they could rent a 60’s trailer on a lot.
Cause its easy to pop out kids, especially when your not smart enough to wrap up
They're having financial troubles but they keep breeding. Some people never cease to amaze me with their stupidity. And then has the audacity to call in and talk about that the man needs to step up and work even harder.
Exactly but nobody wants to talk about stupid ppl breeding out of control
To be fair the guy should also know that knocking her up is going to increase the amount of bills. They both are at fault. They didn't plan
Get a job and stop making your husband feel like a loser when he’s the only one working
Did you not hear her say she is raising four kids at home? Her work is 24/7, most people’s are 9-5.
@@msi8311 what do you think the husband does when he gets home after work. He is a father 24/7 just as she is a mother.
Super annoying that they don’t even consider the fact that SHE needs a job. Work in the evening when he’s home.
He is a loser though. He should’ve made better career choices. Any decent husband would give his wife the option to not work. Someone’s got to take care of the kids. A husband and father’s job is to provide for his wife and kids.
How many times are you going to repeat this same comment guy? It seems like they have a spending problem, not an income problem. The husband makes plenty of money for north Texas, seems they got into a house they can’t actually afford.
She thinks she can’t sell her house. How are people so naive :(
I'm thinking she wants to keep her lifestyle.
Depending on the loan and if they got some type of first time home buyer deal or whatever, they might have stipulations on selling within a specific timeframe.
I worked 60 hrs a week, my wife worked two jobs and went to school. All with a child. It's possible, they just dont want to put in the effort.
Who watched your child?
@@Sunny888 my wife worked at a preschool. Took her with. I'd work a split shift. Left the house around 3Am. Went home and watch my child for a few hours, then went back to work in the afternoon once mom was home.
What you describe as "effort" is insanity. People should be able to have a reasonable work/life balance working full time.
@@Ladyerica54 what you think is insanity is reality. Lifes a struggle and theres no participation trophies. You need to work for it. Now we have great jobs, own a house, and are financially stable. You dont get anywhere playing the victim.
@@Rob-- Bullseye with that comment!!
Dave, why are you not telling her to deliver pizza after bubba gets home from work?
Dave always takes it easy on women
Why does she need to? Be a man and provide! I have three sources of income through work plus investments. Do whatever it takes!
@@alexs3187 That is u.......
@@alexs3187 Poor Sap
@@alexs3187 I feel bad for you man. You toil away while your significant other lives the good life.
I enjoy having a PARTNER in my relationship, we both work hard and enjoy our down time together.
My wife said I didn’t make enough money and that I was a financial loser. I ended up getting a 2nd job at the Home Depot. She still left me.
Greedy selfish woman
Probability bc "you don't spend time with me" as an excuse. You can never win.
Whats wrong with the Home Depot?
@@infidelheretic923 all women are hypergamous
Nobody said anything was wrong with Home Depot
Everybody in the comments is agreeing that the wife is sounding entitled in this entire conversation. What's worse, she's been trying to play victim in this that she can't do anything as the stay at home mom of four kids. First (and as a new home owner from the beginning of this year), the mortgage paperwork states there how much you end up paying monthly. Why were both of them not paying attention to that figure into their budget? Second, if they've been watching/listening to the Ramsey show, they would have known about the 25% rule and not end up with their dream home just to be house poor.
I feel like there's just misdirected problem here and it's not really the income problem that they both have but lack of planning (kids, house, finances), but also the lack of communication between the two, and the lack of consideration between the two of them. Hopefully, their marriage doesn't fall apart at this crossroad.
Someone’s got to take care of the kids. Any decent husband would give his wife the option to stay home.
Correct. Once the husband makes more, chances are they will inflate their lifestyle.
@@johnmartin4641 and the husband should be allowed to see his kids, make her work nights
@@johnmartin4641 any decent wife would let her husband stay home with the kids
@@Fishouta i don't think that's what the guy wants.
How disappointing!!! What a shame to put EVERYTHING on the mans shoulders. What does he need to do to get us ahead.... No it should be what do WE need to do for OUR FAMILY. This poor guy has gotten with a woman who wants a free ride and give me everything. Get a job and help out!!! It is that simple. Life is hard and it is only harder when families do not work together..
I was that guy 20 years ago. In my case, it was easier for me to work two jobs and have my wife stay home and handle the household. Then, when I was home, everything was caught up and done so we could enjoy family time.
I agree! She needs to help out. But these are the type of women that find men who will marry them and try to provide everything for them. She’s taking advantage of the situation
Do you guys know how much childcare costs??? She is helping out by staying home.
@@Ladyerica54 I think it's sad how 90% of the people commenting want this mother to go to work just so she can pay someone else to raise her children
@@Winnie-Kay it's indoctrinated into many Americans that's how you are supposed to raise your children. They view staying home as not real work. It's embarrassing how many people are brainwashed 😩🥴
SHE needs to get a job in the evening while he watches the kids. Seems like she's not willing to do that though.
No, she doesn't. Downsize house and get cheaper cars. Stay at home moms are just as important as the husband being an earner.
So she’s gonna get a job to give her entire paycheck to a babysitter? When she can stay home and save money and raise her own kids.
@@luxuryqueen42 hed watch them when shes gone
@@harpjason208Not according to comments. We’re just a bunch of lazy entitled brats that don’t do anything and have nothing to contribute.
Has Dave or his co hosts ever said: Do not have any more kids, please!
They’ve said they don’t believe money should prevent people from starting families. To which I’ve always said, “WHAT?!”
@@ashleyhartadams3939 false he always tell people who are engaged get married. What's the hold up. He never said have kids
Not having kids is the single best financial decision I have ever made
@@alexjones28 yes. He definitely encourages engaged couples to get married, but he also tells married people who have absolutely NO business starting a family, that they should put things on hold to start one because he doesn’t preach that finances should prevent you from having children because they’re blessings. I do NOT agree.
Dave is a total blind Christian, so he would never say that to somebody, sadly.
Christians are all about making kids regardless of the problems it brings to the world.
This just one of the reasons marriage rate is in the sewers. What happened to "stunning and brave, strong and independent that don't need no man" attitude here? She can do something small from home to help a little or downsize. Ultimately it ends up being "HIS fault" only in her eyes. I'm smelling future single mother with this one.
She's gonna leave him
I have the opposite but I have a girlfriend that’s ok with 24 hours of minimum wage and she treats me very well but I’m afraid due to this lack of confidence a marriage would not be a good idea here.
@@rem145 you're gonna have to up your income regardless of if your gf approves or not
A husband and father’s job is to provide for his wife and kids. Any decent husband would give his wife to option to not work.
@@rebel4721 as she should. He can’t take care of her and their children.
I feel so bad for this guy!!!
but not really though, he wouldn't get off of her and made his own decisions.
Na he dug his own grave a married a loser that doesn’t want to work
@@vincetaylor3948 he’s also a loser for continuing to have kids
Why? He’s not doing his job. His job is to provide for his wife and kids and he’s not doing that. I would feel bad for her if she hadn’t made the stupid decision to marry him.
@@johnmartin4641 ok dude we all get it now... you're a provider... you are a real MAN.
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Kiss you husband at the door as he's coming home from work and you are leaving to work. Money problems solved.
She can work from home, weekends, nights, opposite shifts. I know a lady that did insurance billing from home and loved it. She could be home and bring in some money.
She could do door dash around dinner time for an hour or two each day after he’s home from work and they’d be in a comfortable savings range of over $1K per month.
This isn’t the 1950’s anymore, it’s rare for a single income family with kids to live comfortably…
In 2011, you could buy a 4bd. 2bth 1800 sqft home for $50K here in PHX.
Under $200/mo
@@aolvaar8792 2011 was right after the real estate crash though
@@seankauder9721 And?
I'm selling that house for ~$410K and moving to Rural NM, 4bd, 3bth, 2400 sqft
on 0.33 acre city lot for $110K.
Downside 100 miles to a town of 50K
2021 was right after the real estate rise though.
I gaurantee, what constitutes "comfortable" has expanded A LOT since the 50's. People today have so much stuff that isn't necessary.
Some women are allergic to work even if it means sinking the household.
It must be tiring for you to spam so hard as a non-millionaire, no one wants your non-millionaire advice
@@tigerak02 What are you talking about? He is a non-millionaire? Even "hundred-naires" and "thousand-naires" are free to say their opinions.
Ain't no way I'd let my wife sit me down and say "We need to talk about your future career and possibly a second income." Especially if she isn't working.
I Agree
As a future wife, I’d never do this to my husband. That’s emasculating him. Heck, I’d never approach it publicly like this! Start an Etsy business, use UA-cam for ideas to start a side hustle while the kids are sleeping. There’s so much she can do while being a stay at home mom than just publicly complaining “hubby doesn’t make enough money”. This is sad 😢
You and me both
Add her in with the kids cuz she is just another child he has to take care of...
Exactly 🤦🏾♂️🤦🏾♂️🤦🏾♂️🤦🏾♂️ I don’t see why she can’t open a business herself or go to work.
@@collegelifeofderrick5135 cause she's lazy
You’re pathetic.
I’ll admit whenever I hear stuff about families, and things like this when I hear their incomes I always feel a little bit torn. I’m a single guy no wife no kids and no girlfriend. And I always constantly feel like I need to make more money in order to support a family but I see families like this living off of either roughly what I make or even less incomes. And I always tell myself why can’t I have a family too I might just not making enough money, But at the same time I’m always glad I’m not in the situation where your family is dependent on your salary and you have a lot of responsibility.
There's another option.
You DON"T have to start a family.
If you want one go ahead nothing wrong with that. Don't feel like you have to.
You're looking from the outside in when you see other families.
They could in huge debt or they could be paycheck to paycheck or be making a lot of money.
It's not a race.
I'm in the same boat with no kids, wife, or girlfriend.
I'm also 0$ in debt.
@@360undeadHe literally is saying he’s happy he is single but torn.
Why do people decide to have so many children without being able to afford them? Poor kids. It’s not fair to your children if later on you cannot afford to provide for them properly. I hope the parents can correct this. Also, today one has to consider that we already have significant over population on this earth, global warming etc. Imagine what would happen if everybody decided to have this many kids??
Yeah, kids come with a price. *BIG PRICE*
I agree with your first statement, but to not have kids because of climate change is ridiculous. Kids don’t cause climate change. Did you know that every so often the Earth moves slightly closer to the sun and eventually moves back to where it came from? That could explain climate change.
@john Smith I would rather not be born than be poor. When I was younger, I wished I was never born for similar reasons.
@john Smith wow so true lack of faith, spirituality, thinking out of box. Money is not everything in life!
Tell me you watch CNN without telling me.
She needs to get a job or sell the house. They sound like they want a lifestyle they can’t afford and will end up divorced in a few years going down this path
Divorce is coming sooner than later
You two must have healthy relationships..
I’d rather the bitter truth than pretty lies any day.
@@baw-mq4bt
Yup that's seed has been planted.
Imagine the conversation the night after this call: Dave said you need to make more money. (As they all agreed she didn’t need to earn a nickel to fix this problem)
She needs to get a job!
No she doesn’t. Someone’s got to take care of the kids. Any decent husband would give his wife the option to not work. A husband and father’s job is to provide for his wife and kids.
@@johnmartin4641 nah she needs to get a job. majority of families both people work.
@@johnmartin4641she could work nights and weekends when he is home with the kids
Am I the only person that kept thinking May be wife needs a part time job
I was thinking she needs to be more willing to live within their means. Instead it’s her husband’s fault for not making more money.
She definitely needs a job its no excuse these days. Because there are to many work from home jobs.
Any decent husband would give his wife the option to stay home and not work. It’s a husband’s job to provide for his wife and a father’s job to provide for his kids.
@@johnmartin4641 and any decent wife would take what the husband provides and spend it wisely and frugally to take care of the family. She’s unwilling to move out of a home that is double what they can afford. Who knows how else she’s wasting their money. $50k is enough in plenty of places that aren’t big cities like New York or LA
@@johnmartin4641 yes and any decent wife would see her husband struggles and get a job to help him. After all isn’t a wife the help mate of the husband
Wow. This dude is making the median wage $50K is a good income. 1/2 of all workers make less than that. He is an average dude making a decent wage. And they want him to jump from top 50% of all earners to top 15%. They are putting this all on him. She needs to go to work. She could easily go out and find a job making $30K to $35K right now to cover the gap.
If they had the average number of kids it would be a bit of a different story.
Paying daycare for four is going to talker most of that.
Sell the kids.. sell the car.. Ride a gazelle to work..👍
@@donnawilde2936 they should have thought about that before they had 4-kids back-to-back. Sorry but you married an average guy making an average wage. You created this scenario. Solution is to do what all average families do, mom goes and gets a job.
@@eq2092 The youngest kids couldve been triplets or twins maybe
Nurse here married to a firefighter, raised 3 kids. Work opposite hours from each other. She needs to get a job. Never understand why this is so difficult for some women. Don't have 4 kids if you can't afford it.
One income families always have these problems she needs to find a job
By the time she pays daycare she won’t make anything. Maybe night job.
She has a job, she just needs to know how to do her job properly, which will take a little bit of Education, a good housewife can make a little bit of money stretch a long long ways,
They wanted all those kids.
Mother need to work now.
@@jdbjoshua if be looking into e commerce solutions if I was her
I bet I could rework her budget and make it work on 50k
I wish they would have went in depth and broke it down..
I bet food is her biggest expense out side the house payment
This is what happens when you have a generation that thinks men should be the bread winner and a generations that thinks everyone should be equal. No one is happy.
Sometimes I think school needs to teach more about finances, especially if people become a parent!
I think more people should educate themselves because we live in an age where valuable information is readily available
@@360undead The problem is many people can’t learn this on their own even with the resources available today. They need guidance. People shouldn’t need to call Dave, but for some reason they can’t figure out how to do it on their own.
Honestly, they may have decided on her being a sahm already, it sounds like they have. Childcare is ridiculously expensive so while providing in home care for others is an option, her affording childcare at this point is not feasible! their ultimate advice of hooking them up with services to explore, and learning about options for part time work is honesty not a bad idea to plan around, downsizing the home is probably their best bet for immediate relief.
Imagine making 50K a year total and being able to own a home in a new development. This entire concept is foreign to me as a Californian. Unbelievable.
Yeah as a New Yorker, same this sounds insane...
I completely agree. I'm a Californian too. Some of these calls blow my mind when I hear how people earning less than me are able to afford brand new homes. Pretty insane. I'm ready to leave CA though. This state has gone down the tubes. And it's only getting worse.
A lot of different highways lead out of California, you know. Just don't export any California Dreamin' political views in your exit and everybody wins.
@@JP-xq7fo Living in New York sounds insane to many people. What is the upside?
@@ayo_k32 what’s your rent/mortgage in Cali?
My wife needs to do more dishes and clean more. See how stupid it sounds?
She just wants to see your efforts that’s it
Seems like a simple case of lack of understanding of personal financial
Why do people have all these kids they can't afford? News flash: kids are expensive!
Hindsight is 2020
@@citylights3452 not in the age of information. Knowing kids cost money isn't some great revelation.
@@citylights3452 hindsight should come after the 1st or 2nd kid not the 4th one
They are selfish.
Funny thing is I was called selfish long ago because I didn't want kids from these same type of people. I reminded some of them.
Had to ask one guy why he bought a new gaming laptop after I found out he had to leave work because his pregnant wife and kid was stranded on highway with one of the bald tires flat.
@Ethan depends on the quality of those 80+ years of life. It sounds like their children’s’ lives are miserable and will continue to be miserable because their dad failed.
Do what many of us do, work opposite shifts from one another. Like that neither one of you gets burned out and you can increase your income that way.
Good grief. My ex-wife used tell me I needed to make more money. All the while she brought in no income. 😞
Every woman wants her husband to make more money.
Or make less kids…
They should invest in protection first
If I was him I'd sleep on the couch the rest of the marriage ,guess they never heard of contraception
@Ethan seriously nobody should have to struggle to have kids its irresponsible to have so many kids when u obviously can't pay for them
It’s the house , not the kids that are the issue. Kids don’t have to be that expensive on the day to day unless you spoil them with material things.
They never said they couldn’t pay for their kids. Just can’t get ahead. Doesn’t sound like they are getting any aide so they are supporting their kids. Just stuck because they made a poor housing decision.
@Ethan wut?
@Ethan
They are the ones self centered and their worse enemy financially.
Their standard of living was reduced before buying that house they can't afford.
They were good at that.
Hey lady, how about YOU get a job, while your husband gets some time at home with the kids?!
She doesn’t want to downsize! They bought a brand new house....
Its 2021 baby, time for you to show how equal you really are....
c'mon people, you need to make family choices which match your income.
All the men in the comments talking about how they expect a female partner to work as much as they do, I hope are stepping up and taking care of half of the responsibilities of running a home - example: cooking, cleaning, organizing, laundry, childcare if applicable. I've often seen the bulk of this left to the women in relationships with men, despite the woman working outside the home as well.
Why isn't she going to work? $50k is average salary
Was s
She is working
She needs to sell the kids then get a job.
LOL!!
🤣
Don't date or don't buck or condoms
😂😂😂
seems more like they are living above their means
FYI my HOA charges people $20k if you sell or rent out your place within a year of buying. They have hardship waivers but the idea is it prevents investors and flippers from out bidding families trying to buy a house.
Children are a blessing from the Lord. My husband is the sole breadwinner, teaches and has a second job tutoring. He is also proud to carry this burden. We have three little ones and homeschool so I’m working zero hours outside the home currently. I used to work two jobs, had the kids in daycare and my husband and I were ships passing in the night. Getting over needing material luxuries made our family free. Parks and libraries require zero money, and siblings provide more entertainment than any toy you could buy. Living modestly is a joyful existence and those of you ranting about them needing birth control need to examine the bitterness of your hearts.
Yay that's exactly my situation granted my kids are older now in high school and middle school. I have never worked since being married but my days are very full. My husband believes it is his privilege to provide as I feel it is my privilege to take care of him. the home and the kids. I have always prayed to God on how to ease my husbands burden and apparently having a home where the kids are happy and he has a proper meal and clean home is my job. I was formerly a software engineer so I've had my career...I don't miss it.
@@marthar4370... and you just described how you work now. SAHM is also a career.
@@marthar4370 You're missing out on a great salary and easier financial life.
@@TheRealfan1There’s more to life than a great salary. I wouldn’t give up my time with my kids for the world. I’m here when they need me. They’re the priority. Not money.
I don’t know why they want this family to sell $1400 plus utilities is not that much money to live in a house. They’re going to need a huge apartment to fit six people in it
Because they’re house poor. Either earn more or sell.
I can understand why her husband wants to get a second job. He wants to get away from her.
This is absolutely cruel. She stays at home while her husband works and cries that they don’t make enough and wants him to pick up a pt job????? I hope he finds a better partner
I hope she finds a better partner. The guy cares so little about her that he dropped out of school and set himself up for a low paying career. And she’s not staying at home doing nothing; she’s taking care of the kids, which is a very important job.
i bet as soon as husband gets second job, wife will complain he does not spend enough time with her and kids and will call him selfish .
She needs to get a job.
Become a babysitter or something
How can you go to peoples house and babysit when you have your own kids to watch though? People don’t like to leave their kids in an unknown environment unless it’s a legit daycare
If possible, they could look into her opening an at home daycare. My friend did that when she was a single mom as a teenager and couldn't afford childcare for her son. Even in California it wasn't that expensive to get certified and pass the inspections.
Any decent husband would give his wife the option to not work. A husband and father’s job is to provide for his wife and kids.
@@pigpjsI can’t imagine the cost of insurance and everything that would be necessary. Not to mention, she already has four kids and is probably spread thin.
Why didn’t they tell her to get a JOB
Welll ya knowwwww, we cannot question her decisions, that would be huh... problematic nowadays... Or you know, question whether or not she had any say in the selection of the house they are in.
Dude living in the 1920's
Depends on how they would do it. Because if they were to use childcare... that would zero out the benefit of getting most jobs.
Because she shouldn’t have to. Any decent husband would give his wife the option to not work. A husband and father’s job is to provide for his wife and kids. Someone’s got to stay home to take care of the kids. The husband should make more money and he probably would have made more money had he not foolishly dropped out of school. That’s 100% his fault.
@@johnmartin4641 most people who go to school make 50-55k a year. She needs to work.
These are the things you think about before you have four kids…….maybe after the first one
Never will forget when I was riding my bike to college and saw a toddler WEEPING to not have their mother drop them off at day care. It’s unnatural but the incompetent men of today would rather dump their kids on someone else and dump their responsibility to provide for the family onto the wife at the expense of everyone else in the family. They would do well to forgo a family altogether and just have male roommates. Not everyone deserves a family.
This comment sounds like you didn’t even listen to the facts. He works-full time, she won’t get a part-time job in the evenings or weekends when Dad is home. Their are house poor, but she isn’t willing to sell (“they won’t let us” 🙄 yeah, ok). This is an entitled woman, not an entitled man.
I completely agree. Women working also weakens men.
Weird bitches living in an emotional world..
@@katiejon17Bullshit. You didn’t listen to the call. The husband wants a career change. They’re saving to put him through school without loans. She asked about her getting a job but it seems to be that Dave and his cohost said if she could manage she could. She didn’t say she was unwilling. Heck, she’s in the comment section saying her husband would prefer she stay home with the kids. And they sold the house and got someplace more affordable.
As far as your snide remark in selling, they might have been under some contract about not selling. We were for three years, or we paid back assistance. So it’s not an excuse. It could have been a clause she had to sign.
@@BlueDauntless I can see you are triggered 🤣
Hello it's 2021 She needs to become an asset to this family.Stop having kids that you can't afford dumbbell.
She is an asset. Who cares for the family?
She can have all the kids she wants it's the husband responsibility to care for his family financially there is nothing wrong with a baby only some parents that have them women choose the right person to have babies with he don't need to be a rich man just a smart one
When our kids were young, my husband worked full-time and I worked part-time. She could work weekends. He can watch the kids. Tina
Not if she’s breastfeeding.
Her concerns are very real. I hope the family will be successful and happy forever.
Marry a proverbs 31 woman. This woman is ridiculous. There are plenty of ways to make money from home. Don't marry someone who wants to spend more than they want to earn.
Why sell the house? Even if the payment will go to $1400, where will a couple with 4 children live for less? If you can't afford a $1400 house payment, how will you afford a $1500 or more rental?
Public housing is based on income. It will be way less than $1400.
It’s sad because it used to be affordable to provide for a family with one income.
Unfortunately that hasn't been the case in a long time now
That was long ago but nobody today is reading the memo.
Yeah one time, for about 30 years, out of all of human history. It was a fluke. For most people, life in the future is going to be more like 1930 than 1950.
It still is if you make good career choices and don’t do something stupid like drop out of school like this woman’s idiot husband did. I know because I did it for my wife and kids.
Still is If you ignore the news/media and drama.
Common to raise two or three kids on $50k where I live including homeschooling.
But these people aren't the type that will be calling or needing Dave for anything.
The current and future family income prospect should determine how many kids a couple should have. One spouse is sit at home and another spouse is bread winner is a bad strategy in general in today's economy. This strategy is far more susceptible to risk of getting broke, resentment and domestic violence.
Why can't she help out and drive UberEats/Doordash on Friday nights and Saturday afternoons while he watches the kids?
Good idea
Some people can make over 20$ an hour doing that.
She shouldn’t have to. Any decent husband would give his wife the option to not work. A husband and father’s job is to provide for his wife and kids.
@john yes ✨🙏🌹
@@johnmartin4641 😂😂😂😂
Hope her husband has good life insurance.
Maybe she could start an in home business as a babysitter for all of the working mothers in her neighborhood or learn how to sew and do alterations. The husband could cut his neighbors yard once he finishes cutting his on every weekend. This could easily add a few hundred to the budget each month.
Don’t have kids unless you can afford them!
Honey, you can't stay at home and eat Bon Bons forever. Get a part time job.
Wonder how old they are. Hopefully she gets a little gig from home and he finds his purpose in life and earns more as well.
This was key to my success. I was just aimlessly working dead-end jobs had no idea what my purpose in life was. Someone gave me this book I always talk about in Dave's comment section "Purpose Driven Life" by Rick Warren it changed my life forever.
She can probably baby sit neighbor kids. That’s how my grandma made extra money so she could invest in stocks and property in Seattle in the 80s. It worked out well for her. Best to them.
With four (presumably) young children, it seems unlikely that she can get a job that would make more than childcare for four children. Something like reselling used clothes might be the best she can manage in this situation.
@@razmiddle9410 or watching other people kids
@@HacksawJimThuggin With four kids she's already watching? I'm pretty sure that's illegal in almost all states, to have one person watching five young kids...
Lady you need a job, YOUUUUU DO NOT NEED ANYMORE CHILDREN. 🤷🏾♀️
She could at least look for some work she could do from home. Even if it’s 10-15 hours a week, it would help!
Because she got herself pregnant?
this is why you don't have more kids than you can afford to take care of
Yeah because property taxes increase with each child.
@@abey6131 not true in NY state at least. What state are you talking about?
Instructions unclear...she's pregnant again
so many entitled women who sit at home and feel that their husband should work a second job or even more. why can't she get to work and do something on the side? what's wrong with her
And Dave and all his personalities reinforce this. Super annoying.
Someone’s got to take care of the kids. The husband should’ve made better career choices so he could support his wife and kids from one job like any decent husband and father would. Any decent husband would give his wife the option to not work. A husband and father’s job is to provide for his wife and kids.
@@johnmartin4641 i completely agree
If this woman wants to get a little, she has to give a little. She should be looking for a part time job while her husband looks for a career path towards a higher income.
I ain’t saying she’s a golddigger….
50k isn't enough, she has a point
@@axe2001 it isn't enough cuz she's mooching HARD
😂
What is the freaking point of being house poor? Gimme four non condemned walls and basic furniture and I'm happy.