Black Women and The Hygiene Olympics

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  • Опубліковано 5 лис 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 8 тис.

  • @rallitas11q
    @rallitas11q Рік тому +16138

    In middle school I had this friend who apparantly smelled really bad where even teachers would make faces when she passed by. I couldn't really tell because I couldn't smell that well (allergies) but I always thought that everyone took the jokes too far. It turned out that her mom didn't allow her to use deodorant yet. At the end of the year she gave me a note where she wrote "thanks for being my friend". I hope she's doing well.

    • @aprilbennett4161
      @aprilbennett4161 Рік тому +1278

      I once had a schoolmate in middle school who honestly smelled like fish, and it'd fill a whole room within thirty minutes, like the bo of over half a dozen football players who skill post-game showering. She'd get teased all the time, and even I was disgusted and avoided her. It wasn't until years later that I Googled her symptoms and discovered that she probably has trimethylaminuria.

    • @InfestedLice
      @InfestedLice Рік тому +773

      That honestly sucks, i wonder why her parents didn’t allow deodorant? Was it due to culture or religion ?

    • @Shizukanexen
      @Shizukanexen Рік тому +623

      ​@@InfestedLice I mean, a lot of deoderants have terrible chemicals in them. I got cysts under my arms from deoderants with aluminum in them (the majority of commercial deoderants) when I was little, and assuming this was 10+ years ago, we didn't have many easy options for stuff that is natural and safe like we do now.

    • @SebastianBlackwell94
      @SebastianBlackwell94 Рік тому +124

      ​@Shizukanexen i also got a cyst from deodorant back in 2008

    • @tessaelto1472
      @tessaelto1472 Рік тому +220

      Bro this made me cry 🥺😭😭

  • @Therealmykag
    @Therealmykag Рік тому +5796

    I saw a post that roughly said, “The Vagina is literally an opening into the body, it’s going to smell. It’s not supposed to smell like flowers.” And it completely changed my anxiety surrounding bodily odor. Take care of your gut, and stay hydrated! Remember that people are mammals, animals. We’re human and we’re gross, you’re good.

    • @engelberthovel8566
      @engelberthovel8566 Рік тому +1

      AMEN!!! Genitals aren’t supposed to be pretty, they’re honestly very ugly because they’re built for UTILITY!! Just enjoy yourselves, people!!

    • @cupoftlc1006
      @cupoftlc1006 Рік тому +201

      While this comment is nice, it’s also kind of harmful and misogynistic. If the scent is bad and cant go away with a shower, pee and sweat smell, then people need to see a dr. And look into their diet. The scent shouldn’t be unpleasant or fishy.

    • @mhj4
      @mhj4 Рік тому +974

      @@cupoftlc1006 no idea where u got misogyny from in that comment at all lol. the point is just that a vagina won’t smell “good” in the way flowers or perfume smell good. doesn’t necessarily mean it smells bad either.

    • @yukikanegawa7470
      @yukikanegawa7470 Рік тому +372

      ​@@cupoftlc1006Those are different circumstances. The 😺 does have a an smell. It's not necessarily bad but it's not what you think of when you think of pleasant smells. It's just a scent that exists. If that smell changes or smells particularly strongly or bad then yeah you should look into that and maybe go to the doctor.

    • @anab.3835
      @anab.3835 Рік тому +292

      @@cupoftlc1006where was the misogyny? I swear people hear a word and run with it….

  • @leeann4329
    @leeann4329 Рік тому +6881

    As a Caribbean black woman we have it ingrained in our heads "just because we're poor doesn't mean we have to be dirty"

    • @katieegan5178
      @katieegan5178 Рік тому +476

      Raised by Irish parents and same! It drove me insane growing up that they were so OCD compared to other kids families in the US … the older I get the more it makes sense though. You don’t get to feel in control of much of your life as a poor person, but you can make sure you take good care of what you do have. And everyone deserves to feel good about themselves when they step into the world, life is hard enough!

    • @erinclarocca
      @erinclarocca Рік тому +198

      As a white woman I was also taught this. The same for our home - just bc poor doesn’t mean we don’t maintain & clean the home.

    • @Burn143
      @Burn143 Рік тому +167

      Yeah that’s true, we do. I grew up in a Caribbean household (Mother is Trinidadian, father is Jamaican). My mother always said that same exact line growing up. Even if you didn’t have much, take care of what you have, practice good hygiene, and cleanliness was the way to go.

    • @raic3283
      @raic3283 Рік тому +1

      Yep

    • @brandyyolidio4213
      @brandyyolidio4213 Рік тому +30

      Wish that was the rule for everyone

  • @asiajones5798
    @asiajones5798 Рік тому +2782

    It starts early af. I remember in middle school, Black girls being shamed by other Black girls for having discharge in their underwear. Girls would literally brag about not having any discharge… as if discharge isn’t a sign that your vagina is cleaning out itself.

    • @pinkpugginz
      @pinkpugginz Рік тому +333

      thats insane...no kids ever talked about thay at my school. why woukd that even be brought up. gives sexual abuse victim vibes. an adult must have said that to them. then they bully other people

    • @Niobesnuppa
      @Niobesnuppa Рік тому +100

      That's awful. Teenagers can be so mean too.

    • @maimunaali3072
      @maimunaali3072 Рік тому +158

      ​@@pinkpugginz thought the same it does give sexual abuse victim vibes. i hope that's not the case but still an adult probably told them that cuz where would they get that from???

    • @idorus
      @idorus Рік тому +105

      @@pinkpugginz this whole video is about black people learning this from their elders so they most likely heard it from older black women

    • @monica1047
      @monica1047 Рік тому +6

      I remember that happening too!

  • @HOLLYWUDSHUFFLE
    @HOLLYWUDSHUFFLE Рік тому +5759

    400+ years of people telling you you’re dirty will do some serious damage on a persons mental and their off spring. Understand it’s deeper than people like to think.

    • @SiSi-oi5xn
      @SiSi-oi5xn Рік тому +56

      Then maybe they shouldn’t call white people dirty if it’s so damaging

    • @kellynaz9256
      @kellynaz9256 Рік тому +525

      ​@@SiSi-oi5xnwho tf is doing that. On a real systemic level?

    • @HOLLYWUDSHUFFLE
      @HOLLYWUDSHUFFLE Рік тому +402

      @@SiSi-oi5xn come back when they’ve been doing it for 400+ years.

    • @BerryNiceToMeetYou
      @BerryNiceToMeetYou Рік тому +68

      ​@@HOLLYWUDSHUFFLE wow, I can't believe you have been alive for over 400 years.

    • @HOLLYWUDSHUFFLE
      @HOLLYWUDSHUFFLE Рік тому +183

      @@BerryNiceToMeetYou 401 years to be exact

  • @serenity6831
    @serenity6831 Рік тому +16274

    The amount of shame surrounding black women and our genitalia is insane.... And whoever said it's supposed to smell like "fruit" is a dunce.

    • @alanabruno
      @alanabruno Рік тому +1

      Girl it’s 2023, proper hygiene will tell you your Kitty not supposed to smell like roses but fishy, musty and sour isn’t a scent either… vaginal odor especially is NOT hard to control…

    • @jadziawynter9241
      @jadziawynter9241 Рік тому +575

      I always thought that the smell was also how the inside of the body also smelled like

    • @LoveAndSnapple
      @LoveAndSnapple Рік тому +1471

      Exactly. The vagina is literally an opening to the body and has its own ecosystem.

    • @starbright3509
      @starbright3509 Рік тому +847

      And it’s mainly other blank women doing the shaming…

    • @MISSMADISONMEDIA
      @MISSMADISONMEDIA Рік тому +662

      One man wished for that and now it’s our standard 😂 Absolutely ridiculous

  • @erica9314
    @erica9314 Рік тому +11449

    I used to work with an older black woman and she was telling us we were nasty bc we didn’t put a cap of bleach in our baths. There is no way that that is healthy.

    • @leandreaatkins4224
      @leandreaatkins4224 Рік тому +1219

      My grandma would put bleach in our baths.. probably generational

    • @Grace-jb7me
      @Grace-jb7me Рік тому +1441

      Bleach baths have been a medical treatment for skin conditions like eczema! Just look up bleach baths. I think skin infections were more common back then but I don't think it's as necessary anymore.

    • @lovelydiva06
      @lovelydiva06 Рік тому +441

      Black people and bleach and pine sol in baths now when I think about It, I think wth were they thinking cause this is definitely something I remember some family members doing growing up and it definitely can’t be healthy

    • @Stukupgorgeous1
      @Stukupgorgeous1 Рік тому +69

      I put bleach in my lettuce…then rinse it off no worries

    • @Serenityblu23
      @Serenityblu23 Рік тому +110

      My doctor told me to use bleach .

  • @danijohnnie
    @danijohnnie Рік тому +3700

    ALL of this bashing about how women smell while somebody's son paying top dollar for panties that have been worn ALL day! 🤷🏾‍♀️😂🤷🏾‍♀️ Choose your battles.

    • @TurbulentFlow
      @TurbulentFlow Рік тому +70

      😂😂👏

    • @WordThought
      @WordThought Рік тому

      Cant buy whats not being sold- scent and stank is 2 different things- and thats old white guys buying dirty drawers- pheremones and clam chowder are not the same :)

    • @atlanticgirl76
      @atlanticgirl76 Рік тому +38

      😂😂😂

    • @WordThought
      @WordThought Рік тому +92

      @shonqrenee100 yes natural scent is perfectly fine- scent and stank are 2 different things...

    • @danijohnnie
      @danijohnnie Рік тому +48

      @shonqrenee100 Sniff is the name of the app SiS. Merry Christmas 😂

  • @Pagesandperfumes
    @Pagesandperfumes Рік тому +6684

    Growing up in treatment facilities we were taught to be mindful and to not make fun of the kid with the poor hygiene because sometimes the girl with the bad hygiene is being molested and is hoping not washing will keep the abuser away.

  • @BarbeeSpeaks
    @BarbeeSpeaks Рік тому +5012

    Ummm...I immediately subscribed. As a Black OBGYN, you were spot on. I absolutely hate how the feminine product industry preys on women.

    • @TheBrianagh
      @TheBrianagh Рік тому +79

      Yes especially Lume!

    • @thomyorke7622
      @thomyorke7622 Рік тому +162

      and I've been noticing a lot more "feminine body washes" (vaginal soap) recently, unnecessary!

    • @Mistyerie
      @Mistyerie Рік тому

      It's amazing how many black women I see buying douches.

    • @QRSTUVe
      @QRSTUVe Рік тому +72

      A Black OBGYN ❤❤❤
      Thank you for your service!

    • @abcxyz-dp4rl
      @abcxyz-dp4rl Рік тому +5

      ❤❤❤❤❤❤

  • @chanellynel
    @chanellynel Рік тому +2779

    There's an overarching theme on social media where everyone feels the need to prove themselves to strangers and this is just one way in which people attempt to do that.

    • @IntelexualMedia
      @IntelexualMedia  Рік тому +132

      Agreed!

    • @sarah-jl8cr
      @sarah-jl8cr Рік тому +36

      After the named incidences twitter was a mess. They had me questioning everything I learned about what is healthy for skin etc.

    • @kayhope2602
      @kayhope2602 Рік тому +60

      This 100%. It’s nothing but a cry for attention.

    • @CC-si3cr
      @CC-si3cr Рік тому +15

      I said the same thing just more long winded.🤣🤣🤣I say you shouldn't judge, but when those Kutchers tried joking about how nobody in the house showers daily, I judged! Active children who play outdoors need baths! If not for hygiene just as a routine for bedtime. Nothing annoys me more than ppl w/access who don't use it!

    • @gregorynuptials
      @gregorynuptials Рік тому +9

      Good point! I remember before Cardi B really blew up she made a series of posts on Instagram about sex and I was like who is this ignorant woman? I was really shocked! But now things like that are the norm and people don't believe in tmi anymore

  • @thelinguistshow
    @thelinguistshow Рік тому +2029

    I find the term 'Hygiene Olympics' to be spot on.

    • @MaryLou913
      @MaryLou913 Рік тому +22

      Yes, I read that phrase on Instagram and cried laughing because it’s so perfect!

    • @corsicanlulu
      @corsicanlulu Рік тому +2

      i got this phrase from lipstickalley, its hilarious

  • @NisaTye248
    @NisaTye248 Рік тому +5336

    If one more "divine feminine" brand tries to sell me rose oil and yoni soap 😤

    • @Kaylah_Boswell
      @Kaylah_Boswell Рік тому +1

      Exactly! I’m so sick of random dm’s from those kind of accounts on instagram

    • @IntelexualMedia
      @IntelexualMedia  Рік тому +876

      The word yoni always makes me laugh, it’s the most immature thing about me lmao

    • @suicideshy451
      @suicideshy451 Рік тому +225

      It reminds me of the virginity soap from the Philippines. 😊

    • @jfm14
      @jfm14 Рік тому +284

      ​@@suicideshy451 Oh no... dare I ask?

    • @sharondarenee
      @sharondarenee Рік тому

      @@jfm14I wanna know too ! 👀

  • @trinityharris6515
    @trinityharris6515 Рік тому +3510

    Love this. The fellow black girls at my school were always bragging about how they showered 3x a day and “I could never go that long with spraying perfume” . And it made me realize it was due to the extensive bullying that WOC received at my school for hygiene or having “ugly 🐱’s” man this is so sad!

    • @gaj30
      @gaj30 Рік тому +315

      yeah and a lot of the black girls i knew would try to shame everybody for not being as clean as them and i always wondered why that was such a thing for them

    • @calidawg510
      @calidawg510 Рік тому +4

      you have afro

    • @plantlifeforever6994
      @plantlifeforever6994 Рік тому +201

      I didn't grow up around a lot of black people, but I was close with one black girl and was always amazed by how focused on grooming and cleanliness she was. DAYS on her hair that she could braid in herself, moisturising every day, always smelt incredible and her skin was like...perfect. She just took such exceptional care of herself and I was always wondering how and why she invested so much time and effort in to it, and why that wasn't as important to me - I never asked her why, but I really wish I had now.
      For the record, she never made me feel bad about my own hygiene.

    • @miac2382
      @miac2382 Рік тому +1

      You don't look Black but bi racial or Hispanic. I never was told that but I did hear Black people saying White people are dirty and don't bathe growing up. And wet dog when they do ect.

    • @Tornado1994
      @Tornado1994 Рік тому +7

      @@calidawg510 Natural is EVERYTHING and Whole lot more! Its Arousing too.:)

  • @arriek.1375
    @arriek.1375 Рік тому +2620

    when i see black female “femininity coaches” and they say that we should smell like candy and sweet all the time, i side eye them very quickly.

    • @IntelexualMedia
      @IntelexualMedia  Рік тому +283

      its ridiculous!

    • @patrickmiller1674
      @patrickmiller1674 Рік тому +137

      "Should" is crazy. The nerve of these people

    • @MyNeonBubbles
      @MyNeonBubbles Рік тому +420

      @@vnolan633 There's a difference between being clean and smelling like cotton candy and roses

    • @SweetEssie
      @SweetEssie Рік тому +1

      ​@@vnolan633The problem is that it is artificial. It's like you want women to put cotton candy up their cooch.
      If your elbow smells like elbow and your knee smells like knee and your shoulder smells like shoulder, why does your vagina need to smell like candy?

    • @imbored6037
      @imbored6037 Рік тому +158

      I side eye black feminine coaches periodt.

  • @hazelhedgewitch2188
    @hazelhedgewitch2188 Рік тому +588

    I was the stinky kid. Had no choice. Smelly made my stepdad leave me alone sometimes. I still struggle with it as an adult. I deeply appreciate the kindness in this vid.
    I also deeply appreciate Black Women who, through social media, have taught me some of the hygiene I been lacking due to csa

    • @FUEGOSTARR
      @FUEGOSTARR Рік тому +80

      Wow!!! 😮😮 May you be blessed and safe🩷

    • @Universityofuncommonsense
      @Universityofuncommonsense Рік тому +38

      😢😢😢😢😢

    • @Butterfly-yk9bw
      @Butterfly-yk9bw 11 місяців тому +92

      I pray for your healing❤️‍🩹

    • @mspaint93
      @mspaint93 9 місяців тому +41

      All my love to you dude, shit made me tear up. Hope youre getting through it regardless of hygiene practices x

    • @deesiobhan
      @deesiobhan 5 місяців тому +4

      I see you.

  • @katherinehernandez1139
    @katherinehernandez1139 Рік тому +3482

    I was depressed over the summer and could not bring myself to shower or even brush my teeth. It was dark moment for me and it was made worse by the guilt of being conscious of the fact that by societal standards i was a disgusting human being for not keeping up my personal hygiene. A vicious cycle of poor mental health and then talking down on myself which didn't help to get me out of that dark place.

    • @macummings7818
      @macummings7818 Рік тому +68

      😢❤❤❤

    • @SJ_Vibezz
      @SJ_Vibezz Рік тому +33

      🤗 🧸

    • @86Kera
      @86Kera Рік тому +191

      Hope you’re better . More people get it then we realize.

    • @nibirue
      @nibirue Рік тому

      But white people be going around only bathing once a week and not using a washcloth.

    • @Irishlen64
      @Irishlen64 Рік тому +183

      As a therapist this goes with the territory of depression ad overwhelming anxiety, nothing to be ashamed of. I hope all is good for you now Miss Hernandez.

  • @mewmew6158
    @mewmew6158 Рік тому +2740

    It really sucks that people make having a scent so shameful because sometimes you actually just need to go to a doctor and it has nothing to do with how well you wash.

    • @Chemicaldessert
      @Chemicaldessert Рік тому +506

      You can also have good hygiene and still smell, if I take a shower and then I'm out and about all day by the end of it I'm not gonna smell as fresh as I did straight out of the shower. Sweat and discharge are completely unavoidable as a woman.

    • @alanabruno
      @alanabruno Рік тому +60

      @@Chemicaldessertif you had “good hygiene” then you wouldn’t have a strong odor… ofc by the end of the day, you’re not going to be as fresh as when you first stepped out but I hope that doesn’t mean you’re putrid or musty at the end of a long day😬 THATS a problem…

    • @LoveAndSnapple
      @LoveAndSnapple Рік тому +377

      @@alanabruno We just need to let people’s bodies body. Our bodies are literally ecosystems and we all don’t have to match.

    • @alanabruno
      @alanabruno Рік тому +22

      @@LoveAndSnapple who said anything about matching😂 yes our bodies are ecosystems but just like any other ecosystem, there are WAYS we have to care for our bodies… that ecosystem you speak of includes our mental, vaginal and skin health… remember your SKIN in the biggest organ of your body… if you can’t take proper care of that then how are you caring for your ecosystem🤔

    • @PGOuma
      @PGOuma Рік тому +208

      ​@@alanabruno I think a lot of people are musty after a long work day, especially if you're doing heavy work. People just reapply their deodorant during their work day

  • @LorewithTrees
    @LorewithTrees Рік тому +3017

    We wanted to teach a hygiene/health course at our middle school. Literally just the importance of washing, brushing etc how to care for your body like deodorant after a shower not body spray over sweat, but parents voted no. It's wild that parents are preventing kiddos from accessing that info.

    • @lateforitalways
      @lateforitalways Рік тому +349

      Really huh. I’m surprised the parents voted no. When I was in middle school, it was actually just my gym teacher who told us about proper hygiene. I would think parents would want their kids to know hygiene especially during puberty 😂. Preteens are stinky!

    • @heymisswest
      @heymisswest Рік тому +165

      What???? That's wild! It should be mandatory

    • @Lipanj92
      @Lipanj92 Рік тому +107

      ​@@lateforitalways They indeed are stinky. I almost pass out when a preteen girl walks by me. I always feel bad for them and wonder what neglecting mothers they must have or don't have a mother at all.

    • @Lenora2020
      @Lenora2020 Рік тому +2

      When a teacher calls children (Kiddos)

    • @rav3nhaus
      @rav3nhaus Рік тому +81

      ​@@Lenora2020 So what? They're kids to the teachers.

  • @wangarikariuki6522
    @wangarikariuki6522 Рік тому +1865

    As an African living in Africa, i also think that geographical climates play a huge role in hygiene. I noticed that a number of white people dont shower as often as im socialized to but i thought its because of cold climatic conditions. I doubt my bathing routine would still be the same if i lived in some of these extremely cold places. Here in the hot tropics where weather variations arent so extreme, its imperative to bath atleast once a day. The sweating and dusty conditions simply do not allow for any other option.
    Also, most African cultures emphasize cleanliness that even predate colonization/slavery so yes, these seemingly extreme hygiene practices arent only a factor of imperial rule/racism

    • @seaurchinted
      @seaurchinted Рік тому +136

      I live in the Southern US and during the summer it is very hot and humid. i can say that bathing at least once a day is important to not just smelling decent but also FEELING clean.
      unfortunately i’m a very warm blooded person so i get hot really easily as well as being genetically prone to acne. as a young teen it was awful- sweating horribly in gym class and finding new huge cysts all over my chest and back when i got home. everyone would try so hard to wipe themselves clean with wet wipes and pile on deodorant and perfume after gym because they didn’t let us use the showers. it sucked.

    • @straw1berry11
      @straw1berry11 Рік тому +23

      She literally mentioned this in the video....

    • @NB-nh2sf
      @NB-nh2sf Рік тому +32

      Hmm interesting. I have many friends from Africa who had to acclimate to America's cleanliness standards and hygiene when they moved here. One of my good friends, we had to kindly gift a hygiene basket. Body wash deodorant body sprays bc and she admitted later that in Africa using deodorant showering frequently wasn't the norm. She wasnt rich though. A villager and then a bigger city..i mean she had to learn a lot.

    • @Moi_81
      @Moi_81 Рік тому +112

      ​@@NB-nh2sfI lived and traveled throughout various countries in Africa, they all bathed daily and wore deodorant. No one stank. Where was this person from?

    • @nadjak3410
      @nadjak3410 Рік тому +63

      ​@@Moi_81 People don't stink necessarily if they don't shower daily or use deodorant. Actually the habit of frequent showers destroys the skin barrier for the good bacteria that allow you to smell neutral for longer periods of time.

  • @tylerbhumphries
    @tylerbhumphries Рік тому +4203

    I’m a Black woman who has always had a very problematic p*ssy. Lol. I started menstruating when I was 7 or 8 and by the time I was in high school, I was having irregular periods that would last for months at a time with heavy flow. So I was very used to seeing a gynecologist. When I was in college, I developed a smell. My girl was smelling riper than she should so I started showering two times a day and that made it worse. So I went to a gynecologist and told her what was going on. She did an exam and told me nothing was wrong, I just needed to rinse better. She never told me to stop putting soap inside even though she knew I was doing that. When the smell died down but didn’t go away, I started using Summer’s Eve. That gave me a muted smell but it was still a smell. It took me years and two yeast infections to find out I wasn’t supposed to use soap on the inside. A gynecologist should have told me not to put soap on the inside. This is what we’re up against.

    • @lemonslove-lc5tm
      @lemonslove-lc5tm Рік тому +1

      Women can be so trash to other women. She should have given you the advice you required.

    • @Napash.Masharath
      @Napash.Masharath Рік тому +217

      What kind of soap where you using? They all say for external use only omg!! Glad that's all figured out. But as of now I use non scented equate or dove externally, I haven't had an issue in that area for a couple of years

    • @tylerbhumphries
      @tylerbhumphries Рік тому +167

      @@Napash.Masharath probably something like Irish Spring and then Summer’s eve, Dove, and now unscented dial soap. Although I no longer put soap inside. Learned my lesson the hard way,

    • @ummno8645
      @ummno8645 Рік тому +482

      IRISH SPRING??? I’m crying I feel the burning just reading it😭😭😭

    • @caffeinatedkatie4696
      @caffeinatedkatie4696 Рік тому +244

      Thank you for sharing this. It can be hard to talk about stuff like this because everyone makes a joke out of it. I once heard a girl say her p*say tasted like rose petals. I want to think she was joking but these days idek

  • @Kerrviii
    @Kerrviii Рік тому +1427

    One thing I learned from a high school guidance counselor…. they usually find sexual abuse in the home when their students purposely try to neglect their hygiene.

    • @narlywaves2371
      @narlywaves2371 Рік тому +256

      Over cleaning is also a sign ....

    • @loumeep
      @loumeep Рік тому +149

      Yes and weight issues. Protective layers

    • @laurelledubois
      @laurelledubois Рік тому +47

      But there's a huge difference btw abuse / hygiene and not showering every day/multiple times a day. It is not necessary to shower EVERY DAY. There's thing called hydrolipidic film - and it's there to protect your skin from outside intrusions. If you wash every day - especially using foamy soaps - it kills the hydrolipidic film barrier.. I'm 50 yrs old. I've hardly showered every day and my skin is great. Much more should ppl care about what they eat - that has a much bigger influence on B/O than trying to wash off body smells and cover it with fragrance...

    • @jellyacc
      @jellyacc Рік тому +4

      guidance counselor sounds like shes brain dead if she really said that, and since shes a hs counselor chances are im right lol

    • @xiolaamapola3180
      @xiolaamapola3180 Рік тому +65

      ​@@canone.colombeSome abuse victims will wear extra layers of clothing as a way to hide their figure, to feel more safe, and it acts like a barrier for them. It's mental comfort, not physical.

  • @laurelinvanyar
    @laurelinvanyar Рік тому +945

    Thank you for being kind to us depressed girls.

    • @sisternikeisha
      @sisternikeisha Рік тому +46

      Sending you love ♥

    • @denisestatham9879
      @denisestatham9879 Рік тому +44

      Hi, I understand because I have been there, sending you hugs.

    • @Tornado1994
      @Tornado1994 Рік тому +41

      @@sisternikeisha As a POC 40 year old Man, I send love and am sorry for how Feminine Hygiene wasn't properly taught to ya'll. It Doesn't Matter how it Smells in there. At all. Just keep the Flora taken care of, keep it clean and Natural and you'll be good.

  • @rtoriq
    @rtoriq Рік тому +586

    Im so glad this is being discussed. “Performative” is definitely what it is. Obviously we as humans do need cleanliness, but the loudmouths always feel the need to be extra because of some inferiority complex within them.

    • @toxihex876
      @toxihex876 Рік тому +32

      Everybody acts like odor is something out of the ordinary, as if as long as you shower that morning your body is naturally fresh unless you purposefully sit on a pile of garbage. I spent decades of my life not knowing that animal products will cause body odor depending on the amount of fat in them. For some reason, some deodorants make me smell worse because they nuke bacteria I actually need, while others don't, and I still can't figure out why.

    • @divinelivin
      @divinelivin 9 місяців тому +1

      Right

  • @acat6935
    @acat6935 Рік тому +5364

    In college I had a boyfriend who one day announced we couldn't have sex again until I douched because his mom said so. They had a weird relationship (but that's another story) but he was so insistent so I went out and bought a kit. Mind you I had never douched in my life and my own mother, grandmother aunt never suggested it and didn't use it to my knowledge. Well a week after using it I had an odd, unusual odor so I went to the gyno and I had BV which she said was likely caused by douching. She gave me a lecture about never douching and sent me home with antibiotics. Well the antibiotics for the BV then caused a yeast infection. Long story short, leave your vagina alone. It is a self cleaning oven and these products do more harm than good.

    • @PlaywithDaisy
      @PlaywithDaisy Рік тому +95

      I rinse my insides with water twice a day and never had a bacterial infection.

    • @Irishlen64
      @Irishlen64 Рік тому +2

      That boyfriend and his mother sounded like a couple of douchebags.

    • @carolsimpson4422
      @carolsimpson4422 Рік тому +462

      @@PlaywithDaisy bvs happen. Avoiding douching will lower risks but there's no sure fired way to avoid them either.

    • @mermaidmomma3696
      @mermaidmomma3696 Рік тому +50

      Yogurt douches every few months are awesome. A regular douche from the store destroys ph and all good and bad bacteria. It's def not necessary to douche at all though

    • @thecommunity1102
      @thecommunity1102 Рік тому

      Don't put soap, scents, and be very, very weary of hormonal birth control. All of those things will fuck you up and it'll take antibiotics and weeks to months for your system to re-regulate. Also, if you as a woman are in the dark about your own body know that men are absolutely blind about the female body. Don't take any of their advice. Recommend a female gyn too.

  • @MamaDoctorJones
    @MamaDoctorJones Рік тому +6897

    I am THRILLED this came up on my recommended. Thank you for making it, teaching me, and helping normalize normal bodies!

    • @Ash-72
      @Ash-72 Рік тому +88

      Watching this, I thought about your videos.😂

    • @JustJ-Me
      @JustJ-Me Рік тому +80

      I'm actually glad YOU came into the comments. I'm curious if you have any feedback? I've watched a few videos on your channel before and really enjoyed them. There still seems to be quite a bit of shaming around women and our bodies, regardless of race, but this video and the comments have been helpful to gauge what others are experiencing and why. Thank you!

    • @MusicalMe123
      @MusicalMe123 Рік тому +46

      Hi Mama Dr.Jones!!! Thanks for boosting her video! We need pros like you backing truth on Social Media ❤️

    • @SECERETSONG
      @SECERETSONG Рік тому +23

      Girl I thought about you when I saw this! Please give her video some boost on your platforms. A lot of your viewers could learn something here.

    • @dparker1600
      @dparker1600 Рік тому +3

      Yea fish ain’t normal

  • @LaFlor718
    @LaFlor718 Рік тому +2521

    Once in high school a boy I never even hugged said my 🐱 stunk. A friend told me one morning. I literally pointed at him and said loud enough for his friends to hear “who him?! He couldn’t even get a whiff of it!” That was the first and last time anyone tried me and I’m a grown woman now. Baths are my number one form of self care yet I view it like my sex life. Most of us are doing it. But none of us need to be talking about it in social media posts.

    • @moonlightprincess449
      @moonlightprincess449 Рік тому

      He just wanted to act like a bitch

    • @gildedpeahen876
      @gildedpeahen876 Рік тому +306

      YOU PULLED THAT UNO REVERSE CARD ON HIM YES GIRL 🙏

    • @SamariJane
      @SamariJane Рік тому +174

      The last part!! Like why can't we just live and that be obvious that we're clean lol who cares.

    • @quon8835
      @quon8835 Рік тому +55

      Amen! 🙌 Men and Women, Black and whatever else, hygiene should be taken care of and not talked about publicly! 🙏

    • @ThePresentTimeNow
      @ThePresentTimeNow Рік тому +131

      You must had some skrrrroonggg women who read to filth raising you because a lot of us would have been scared or embarrassed to say anything. I love this comment.

  • @emx3720
    @emx3720 Рік тому +126

    This video just made me realise I have never seen ads/ products targeting men’s privates whereas women are bombarded 24/7 with all sorts of products like probiotics/ soaps/ wipes/ douching and expected to smell like a fruit bowl down there….truly unfair

    • @maggiescarlet
      @maggiescarlet Рік тому

      Yup I wanna see an Old Spice ad where Terry Crews reminds men to wash their f***ing *ssholes 😂

  • @LK-sy3kl
    @LK-sy3kl Рік тому +1919

    My otherwise very clean cousin stopped showering in the last few months before she committed suicide. It is definitely a thin line between people just not caring to be clean and it being a result of mental illness.

    • @RuminatingRaptor
      @RuminatingRaptor Рік тому +219

      I'm sorry for your loss.

    • @isidoraveronica
      @isidoraveronica Рік тому +25

      Wow 💔

    • @flawlesshoney
      @flawlesshoney Рік тому +17

      😢💔

    • @Jules2439.5
      @Jules2439.5 Рік тому +35

      I’m so sorry. I wish you and your family peace.

    • @nazimovab3549
      @nazimovab3549 Рік тому +96

      Sorry to hear about your cousin. My sister is Bipolar, along with my mother, and there are times she can't bring herself to shower, brush her teeth, or do laundry. Depression takes a strong hold on her.

  • @swimmingbyrd6283
    @swimmingbyrd6283 Рік тому +598

    I love the free feminine products comment. One day a homeless girl asked me for a tampon. I didn't think twice. I left every tampon I had on my purse for her. I can't even imagine life like that...

  • @ksis86
    @ksis86 Рік тому +586

    I always found it so weird how obsessive we can be about being clean and smelling like we just got out of the shower 24/7. I remember i had a pretty physical job and used to be so embarrassed and worried that everyone could smell my crotch sweat , like why did i care so much about sweating when thats a literal normal and healthy body function?

    • @prettygemini3432
      @prettygemini3432 Рік тому +51

      Because smelling bad is unpleasant. That's just it

    • @InfestedLice
      @InfestedLice Рік тому +22

      Same, but I’m Hispanic and so I often saw how other POCs were treated :/

    • @morganwilliams2597
      @morganwilliams2597 Рік тому +55

      For real though, trying to avoid or shaming your natural body functions just for the sake of appearance is ridiculous.

    • @kencupid3720
      @kencupid3720 Рік тому +1

      @@prettygemini3432 fr

    • @bobtheball5384
      @bobtheball5384 Рік тому +43

      ​@@prettygemini3432
      I think there's degrees of which when it's acceptable. If you're doing as taxing of a job that requires physical labor I don't expect you to come out smelling like daisies.

  • @hotexwife
    @hotexwife Рік тому +545

    THANK YOU!!! I recently had to endure a very embarrassing conversation with a coworker, who implied that I was dirty because I bathe with Dove bars instead of "real soap" and had to listen to her rant about how she bathes twice a day after she wipes her entire house down with Lysol. Now that I understand where her sentiments MAY HAVE stemmed from, it's easier to let go the shame and embarrassment I felt during that conversation

    • @melodya4833
      @melodya4833 Рік тому +47

      Dove is best for “down there” esp if you’re sensitive. I use that and then Cremo soap for the rest of my body

    • @nadjak3410
      @nadjak3410 Рік тому +42

      ​@@melodya4833Honestly Dove is way too harsh imho. A mild oil and a wash cloth to get into all skin folds. Ta da - done. That's how you keep a baby's bum clean and hydrated as well. But tbh I'm lazy and also just use shower gel down there but it's too drying sometimes.

    • @KRW3321
      @KRW3321 Рік тому +58

      I doubt she wipes down her entire house with Lysol daily. First, there’s a lot of surfaces and materials that you can’t just wipe clean or use Lysol on without damaging them. Imagine the cost and time it would take to wipe down the “entire” house. I’d be willing to bet she doesn’t know anything about cleaning or she’s hoping you don’t so she can make you feel bad.

    • @lynsylva-bb6ss
      @lynsylva-bb6ss 11 місяців тому +14

      Doesn't matter what soap you use as long as you use it .

    • @meeka59
      @meeka59 11 місяців тому +13

      ​@@KRW3321I actually use to wipe door Knobs, light switches, toilet handles, etc..daily. it took all of a few minutes but that was like 20 years ago after taking microbiology lol. Then I went to weekly but giving less of a damn bc we still living 😂.

  • @VioletTheGeek
    @VioletTheGeek Рік тому +1706

    The saddest part is that douching is so awful for vaginal health, and it has zero benefits, yet companies get away with marketing it like they do.

    • @mightymeatymech
      @mightymeatymech Рік тому +108

      I had a college friend who I thought had a good head on her shoulders, start tryna tell me I needed to douche and that her grandma told her it is not that bad.
      Her grandma also made her swallow straight tea tree oil to treat her strep throat, so... Not really the medical advice I was gonna take tbh

    • @dumbdumbstupid8613
      @dumbdumbstupid8613 Рік тому

      really? my mom told me her gynecologist recommended it.

    • @Misstressofdons
      @Misstressofdons Рік тому

      ​@@dumbdumbstupid8613 gyne's can be ignorant people beholden to societal shaming too. Douching is highly damaging and injures vaginas. The vsgina is a self cleaning organ, it does not need us blasting it full of bleach or whatever.

    • @lalalola.
      @lalalola. Рік тому

      @@dumbdumbstupid8613 there must be a specific reason then, overall it’s not recommended for a normal healthy vagina

    • @fenyoaeemckinney2144
      @fenyoaeemckinney2144 Рік тому

      ‘Cause greedy corporations only care about the almighty dollar! Duuh! They’ll sell you bad foods, makeup, houses and multiple harmful products just for the money! So, of course the average ignorant consumer will buy sh#t that is totally unnecessary!🤪

  • @kimallnaturelle
    @kimallnaturelle Рік тому +2583

    Thanks for doing this video. A few months ago, my boyfriend and I was discussing our hygiene routines. I told him that Haitians bear the brunt of anti black racism globally (being made an example of for centuries policy wise) and we are super on top of our hygiene culturally. I even told him that any uncleanliness was linked to shame and disrespect of my ancestors.
    My own grandmothers instilled the following ideas in me so much that I hear them till this day in my mind.
    "Shower before stepping out your house. "
    "Always shower and wear pretty underwear to bed just in case you're rushed to the hospital"
    "Always have your hands and feet done."
    All of this was to overcompensate for the stereotypes that Haitians were unclean, had AIDS and are savages.
    I'm still healing from my OCD ways lol. I keep my feminine care natural, unscented and minimally invasive. The market vilifies our natural vaginas. Annoyed!

    • @TriggaTreDay
      @TriggaTreDay Рік тому +114

      I’m sorry you have to deal with that. Being American it was always made to us growing up that black people from other countries were some how dirty and stinky and if we want to be better we had to do all of these extra things. The imagery we saw on tv of our foreign brothers and sisters were not the best. It’s all a system that we were placed inside to believe that as black people we are the dirty ones so we had to go above and beyond to prove that we are not. I truly hate this, but these conversations are healing for us all.

    • @Serenityblu23
      @Serenityblu23 Рік тому +23

      The 1st 2 my mom said alot. We are not Haitian though

    • @kinga5224
      @kinga5224 Рік тому +125

      Can you believe that I kept hearing the same thing about nice underwear "in case of the hospital" in Poland 🥴

    • @cj222100
      @cj222100 Рік тому +46

      Yeah, my mom had a variation of your second example, but she said 'always make sure you're wearing clean underwear in case you're in an accident & have to go to the hospital'.

    • @missd411
      @missd411 Рік тому +39

      I'd say we as Africans bear at least equal if not more of the brunt. Even today people wonder where you learned English and ask questions like where do we give birth and are we happy we will be using a toilet for the 1st time. There are even commenters here in the comments saying "it's true" that we are funky. And the worst part is that people assume we are so backwards that we don't even know how we are perceived or see 'being dirty' as a problem. Some people even feel that Africans/blacks (and south Asians at times) are inherently dirty. And we as black people equally judge and make assumptions based on origin, skin tone etc of other black people
      I'm not saying everyone is perfect but people will use the example of people in the worst situation or an off day and say that's how we all are and that's how those people always are even if you take them out of poverty. Mind you we are talking about a whole continent with different (and mostly extensive hygiene practices). And that's far from reality. I remember speaking to a chick who was working with a charity organisation in the country where I was doing my MSc in Europe and she said the most demanded items by African asylum seekers are soap, toothpaste, lotion and roll-ons! Before things like snacks and even some food items. It's that important for them to feel and look clean!
      But I also see how Haitians are perceived in a similar way (and being darker skinned anywhere just adds another layer to the stereotype)
      We are all socialised as black people to obsess over hygiene, be incredibly judgemental, overexplain how perfectly clean we are and point out how other races are not because of the insecurity we feel (ultimately all humans will have some odour in line with their lifestyles and individual genetics even if you're super clean...coz you're human! so let's stop judging particularly over 'mild' smells which are natural e.g. vulva musk!)

  • @itsjustarie
    @itsjustarie Рік тому +1584

    Also as a plus sized black women I have hyperpigmentation especially around my neck and when I tell you it is tiring continuously telling people that its not dirt around my neck and having rumors being spread that im dirty. 🙄

    • @MissMiaAfroGoddess
      @MissMiaAfroGoddess Рік тому +113

      I have that too, it’s called acanthosis nigricans. It’s because I have PCOS

    • @wtallen3935
      @wtallen3935 Рік тому +125

      Consider decreasing your sugar intake. Hyperpigmentation can be a sign of pre-diabetes.

    • @americansforhire5378
      @americansforhire5378 Рік тому +96

      @@wtallen3935 bro stfudh you don’t even know them

    • @nora_evans
      @nora_evans Рік тому +76

      ​@@americansforhire5378 I know. I have that too. And my father has diabetes. Doctor said I may have it in future if I won't change my food and do some sports

    • @0aghost0
      @0aghost0 Рік тому +95

      @@americansforhire5378 it isn't being rude though? it could be worded in a more tactful way, but this is literally a very common sign of a health issue that can end up being debilitating and even deadly. if the hyperpigmentation is velvety, it is likely acanthosis negricans, which is a early sign of high blood sugar.

  • @Deafkid97
    @Deafkid97 Рік тому +1137

    I have poor hygiene due to mental health, adhd, & a history of child neglect. I have always been deeply embarrassed that it’s hard for me to take care of my body with these barriers. I know that I am not the target demographic for this video but I want to thank you for being factual about hygiene but not stigmatizing

    • @angelaruyle2041
      @angelaruyle2041 Рік тому +73

      Right there with you.

    • @lunali2368
      @lunali2368 Рік тому +96

      As someone with ADD, hygiene is not always a consistent thing. but, it is a form of self care so it feels good to do it. Having people that you frequently meet up with can help you stay up with it. I do know those bedridden days are hard but theyll get better💜

    • @chelseaxoxo784
      @chelseaxoxo784 Рік тому +30

      I used to have the same issue but I levelled up ❤.
      If you do need help, you can reply this at anytime.
      Remember, we are not our backgrounds or the people who raised us✨

    • @circus111
      @circus111 Рік тому +39

      hey! invest in fun hygience things like sugar scrubs and bath bombs and skincare and that way ull become more interested in personal hygience stuff, especially since you invested your money into it! it really does work

    • @angelaruyle2041
      @angelaruyle2041 Рік тому +30

      @circus111 you are right. I bought a strawberry taffy body wash and I really enjoyed using it and can't wait to use it again.

  • @nikkibrissett5477
    @nikkibrissett5477 Рік тому +1948

    Becoming a woman my mama always told me the Va- JJ cleanses it’s self. Those products only lead to easier access to catching diseases. Thank God I have a nurse for a mom 😊

    • @bascoaful
      @bascoaful Рік тому +133

      And if it starts smelling different, go to your doctor

    • @miss.l.1563
      @miss.l.1563 Рік тому +43

      Your mum is right! 👍💕 .

    • @quitedapper
      @quitedapper Рік тому +100

      This is so true. I hate that douching is still a thing. The National Institute of Health states, "Douching has been associated with many adverse outcomes including pelvic inflammatory disease, bacterial vaginosis, cervical cancer, low birth weight, preterm birth, human immunodeficiency virus transmission, sexually transmitted diseases, ectopic pregnancy, recurrent vulvovaginal candidiasis, and infertility."

    • @cherrrielouise
      @cherrrielouise Рік тому +45

      THAT is how you spell va-jj lmao I'm never saying it or spelling it any other way ever again

    • @Victoria_06647
      @Victoria_06647 Рік тому +4

      @@cherrrielouise right😂

  • @copperblaze22
    @copperblaze22 Рік тому +592

    Be mindful of older girls who stop washing or who only wash outside of home. It's one of the signs of sexual and child abuse. Sometimes someone won't mess with you if you smell.

    • @NerdSplash5555
      @NerdSplash5555 Рік тому +86

      It use to work for me,to keep my dad's brother out of my room.

    • @TK_Danes
      @TK_Danes Рік тому +73

      It's a safety mechanism for sexual abuse for surw

    • @86Kera
      @86Kera Рік тому +84

      Wow this made me tear up. Never knew .

    • @briolivia
      @briolivia Рік тому +42

      I literally thought of this and people have the nerve to be rude about it. You never know what people are going through

    • @copperblaze22
      @copperblaze22 Рік тому +23

      @Being human is so overrated💤yawns💤 I am so sorry. I didn't learn about this until I took a women of color and health class maybe decade ago and now I remember how some girls would be sleepy, smelly, and have an "attitude" in the morning. Y'all literally had to fight demons every day and night.

  • @staceybeck4292
    @staceybeck4292 Рік тому +1312

    My first ex used to berate me about the way I smelled and would joke that “he could smell my p*ssy from here” even though I had just showered. Meanwhile, his apartment was a pig stye and there were old take out containers and pizza boxes everywhere. It made me hyper conscious about my hygiene and I told myself that no one would ever tell me I smelled bad again. 5 years later, even with my current partner, I still will avoid physical contact, especially sexual, unless I have taken a shower within the last day. I don’t know if it is something I will ever be able to break.
    Edit: added some clarifications. Also, to tell you how bad the apartment was, as a prank, he and his friends left a fully opened 64oz container of chopped garlic in his roommate's room amongst the garbage to see how long it would take him to notice. It was 3 weeks. And the whole apartment was like that. But sure, I was the one that smelled bad.

    • @wendyev310
      @wendyev310 Рік тому +309

      I’m sorry you had the misfortune of dating such a terrible person

    • @jujulachlan11
      @jujulachlan11 Рік тому +110

      i’m so sorry :( i’m glad you got out of that relationship, you’re not dirty!!

    • @WordThought
      @WordThought Рік тому +20

      dont think he was joking- and a messy apartment is not the same as a funky crack- it happens we deal with it to a point, but it is a major factor- yall never consider that he may be turning his nose up while handling u from the back- most men would never say anything to protect ur feelings- but plz- wash b4 sex always- its traumatizing to a man- i avoid it too if my balls is funky- i always shower first-

    • @MyKeeP81
      @MyKeeP81 Рік тому

      you should break it cuz its all in your head. not healthy

    • @painteroffeels7466
      @painteroffeels7466 Рік тому +38

      I'm sorry, that's awful. I feel the same way. I'm so afraid of a man telling me I stink.

  • @melissajean4149
    @melissajean4149 Рік тому +250

    I love this. Another portion of this is how serious it is to be called “musty” or stink. You have better luck beating an accusation of murder before beating an accusation of being musty. Smelling bad in public is a thing that stays on your permanent record forever.

  • @MelanieJMurray2023
    @MelanieJMurray2023 Рік тому +945

    This was awesome. So glad it came up in my suggested feed. In Canada, they called us Indigenous women “dirty Indians,” and in my community we’re experiencing an epidemic of our stolen sisters being disposed of in dumpsters and landfills. It’s no wonder BIPOC fear being called “dirty.”

    • @HoneySwtDrms
      @HoneySwtDrms Рік тому +12

      Please stop using the word “BIPOC”
      It’s erasure.

    • @lily5952
      @lily5952 Рік тому +231

      ​@HoneySwtDrms that's ALL you can say after reading the above comment? Wow.

    • @kphoria1009
      @kphoria1009 Рік тому +91

      @@HoneySwtDrms that’s the most important thing?

    • @HoneySwtDrms
      @HoneySwtDrms Рік тому +1

      @@kphoria1009 Yes it fucking is! Tons of folks are discussing how this topic pertains to their specific community. Last I checked, this video was about Black women! People hate focusing on Black women and are always bringing their communities into conversations about us! STOP THAT SHIT!!!

    • @galaxylucia1898
      @galaxylucia1898 Рік тому +105

      @@HoneySwtDrmserasure for who? It literally covers everyone who is NOT white🤨😒

  • @cochineal2851
    @cochineal2851 Рік тому +458

    I hate that so much of our existence has been reduced to an attempt to dispel racists assumptions about our blackness. And that’s word to Toni Morrison. It is actually and absolutely exhausting.

    • @HoneySwtDrms
      @HoneySwtDrms Рік тому

      The damage that white people have caused us is insurmountable

    • @c4tac133
      @c4tac133 Рік тому +2

      literally

  • @berickslime6718
    @berickslime6718 Рік тому +1821

    I find this extremely interesting as a black man. Even within black male circles, a majority of men have strict hygiene regiments as well, especially in the ones in athletics. Growing up, we could not go a week without getting a haircut, having to wear a durag to sleep every night. We had to shower every day with no questions and put on lotion. Also, many of my peers were very meticulous about clothing and keeping sneakers in pristine conditions. We were dirt poor and still had to adhere.
    But unlike for women, who mainly had to overcompensate due to the judgment of men, we had to do it so that we looked employable. We were told we would never get a good job looking like a bum.

    • @_ghoul3z
      @_ghoul3z Рік тому +130

      Ty for sharing. I can’t know the perspective u have as a woman so it’s my first time hearing abt this. I grew up w 2 sisters and my dad was private abt his hygiene but like u mention-clean polished shoes and barbershop every week. Also cologne. I’d have no other way of knowing sm of this goes deeper bc guys in my family hide it well. Wish we all weren’t weighed down by these stereotypes

    • @berickslime6718
      @berickslime6718 Рік тому +81

      @d. yeah, it has caused so much lingering insecurity. Now that I am grown and live and work in predominantly white environments. I still feel like I have to always keep up a certain appearance in order to navigate. But in reality, no matter what I do, the stereotyping is going to occur anyway.

    • @DeeDaKaang1
      @DeeDaKaang1 Рік тому +41

      Very true......I work as The Head of Security at a Middle School and you would be amazed at the # of young guys who call themselves "ladies men", keep their sneakers in prestine condition yet come to School smelling like a bag of onions.

    • @cherryorchard5600
      @cherryorchard5600 Рік тому

      This is overkill and not natural. It’s unhealthily overcompensating for something or some idea that slave masters forced onto slave descendants, that they now think was all their idea instead of their programming

    • @dggfddgdrfdddgd2124
      @dggfddgdrfdddgd2124 Рік тому +7

      So true, I’m not black but I’m a female and just take a shower or multiple everyday natural because the hot water literally relaxes me and relieves stress but I do feel like a lot of it for women is related to judgement of men to be sexually desirable and another reason all together for men. Although men do get embarrassed when their dick smells

  • @dezzyoc9096
    @dezzyoc9096 Рік тому +1416

    Honestly, I’m a black woman who showers every other day and sometimes every three days. Of course I wash my vagina, butt, and face everyday, twice a day, but for me washing too much makes my skin worse. I’ve had eczema and psoriasis since I was a little kid. Showering too much would dry out my skin and the lotion did not help. I’ve never been told I smell by friends or family members. I just wanted to share this so people don’t feel pressured into taking a bunch of unnecessary showers that make their skin conditions worse. Of course be mindful of your hygiene.

    • @ttaybelle
      @ttaybelle Рік тому +125

      I shower every other day too! I also got hella dry skin when I’d wash every day, so that’s why I stopped. I think we put pressure on people to follow the “correct” hygiene habits to the point where it goes too far. Everyone is different and requires different hygiene that works for them. I mean we’ve come to that understanding with hair care, that some people need to wash their hair every few days and other people once a week or less, it shouldn’t be any different than washing other body parts too!

    • @levi-ly5vg
      @levi-ly5vg Рік тому +40

      @@ttaybelle same, I found that gentle non foaming face wash allows me to get clean without sacrificing my skin when I work and sweat a lot, I'll never go back. That plus the CeraVe lotion has healed years of skin damage and hyperpigmentation from constant irritation.

    • @prettyxbonez96
      @prettyxbonez96 Рік тому +22

      Also, ask your doctor to recommend special soaps and lotions for your specific skin condition

    • @kaaayyyyyy111
      @kaaayyyyyy111 Рік тому +56

      I feel like as long as you wash the important parts you should be fine . I can't imagine the skin on your arms or legs is thaaaat dirty especially when clothes protects your skin.

    • @Urm0mz
      @Urm0mz Рік тому +24

      This was how I was raised and from a biological perspective, the main places where bacteria accumulate are the only areas that need to be cleansed daily.
      If you look at your pets, they are designed to reach their biome areas. They depend on other cats bathing or owners to clean areas they cannot get to on a daily basis 😅
      We aren't pets but we are animals. Anyone wish someone would wash their back for them? 💁🏾‍♀️

  • @charmaineespeut4627
    @charmaineespeut4627 Рік тому +530

    Soap + water + washcloth= clean
    Its that simple. No fancy douches, lysol, bleach and crazy things.

    • @lovelocked5385
      @lovelocked5385 Рік тому +9

      Femflora probiotics are important.

    • @phglam
      @phglam Рік тому

      Omg loved your comment. It's really not that serious. Just clean yourself with soap and water and stop talking about it damn it's that simple.

    • @ladymsthing6056
      @ladymsthing6056 Рік тому +74

      Exactly, please stay away from all that nonsense that will actually screw up your ph.

    • @jennifernabrahamable
      @jennifernabrahamable Рік тому +74

      @@lovelocked5385 unless you have an actual infection, eating the correct foods (including yogurt) and keeping hydrated will be enough (plus what the OP said).

    • @evaphillips2102
      @evaphillips2102 Рік тому

      Be careful with soaps. A lot of them contain chemicals which mess up your PH balance. Wash with only wate, and drink lots of water then you should be fine.

  • @zainz7438
    @zainz7438 Рік тому +1243

    I love how committed you are to providing this information. You did your research, dressed up for the video, edited the video well with lots of visual options. I love your dedication - black women work hard, and I love it.

    • @IntelexualMedia
      @IntelexualMedia  Рік тому +56

      Thank you so much 😊

    • @JustJ-Me
      @JustJ-Me Рік тому +5

      @@IntelexualMedia I hope you don't mind, but I asked another creator if she'd mind checking out your video. I thought it was really interesting and gave me a different perspective as far as learning and understanding to the best of my abilities, things I wasn't all that aware of prior to watching. She's a black woman, and she thought the topic sounded interesting and worth checking out. Your video generated a lot of dialogue about such a vast amount of topics relating to hygiene and how they're experienced from one person, culture, circumstance, ethnicity, childhood/upbringing, place one resides, etc to the next.
      Thanks for providing the content.
      I agree that so many black women do work very hard.

    • @JustJ-Me
      @JustJ-Me Рік тому +7

      @@backhurts11 They're also not taking away from the work that other creators do/ put effort into.

    • @IntelexualMedia
      @IntelexualMedia  Рік тому +14

      @@backhurts11 you’re so mad I’m receiving flowers 😂😂😂😂 cry harder

    • @hihowareyatoday573
      @hihowareyatoday573 Рік тому +6

      @@backhurts11 how is this video a basic task tf?

  • @carayj
    @carayj Рік тому +376

    When I was growing up the ultimate insult would be "you smell like fish" 🐠

    • @alanabruno
      @alanabruno Рік тому +48

      Still is to this day because who tf wants to be smelling fish or smelling LIKE fish🥴

    • @saxviars9749
      @saxviars9749 Рік тому +15

      A girl said that to me once in sixth grade, I didn't even know what it meant at the time haha

    • @RachelRampage88
      @RachelRampage88 Рік тому

      Yooooooooo I'm howling

    • @legzfalloffgirl5148
      @legzfalloffgirl5148 Рік тому +12

      Yep, "I smell fish, close your legs!!" Was shouted at me and other girls more times than I can count

    • @makaylataft1545
      @makaylataft1545 Рік тому +5

      Still to this day It gives me PTSD.

  • @queensheeba1791
    @queensheeba1791 Рік тому +252

    This is the stuff they should teach LITTLE GIRLS/YOUNG WOMEN in school. A whole class/period alone. We needed this. I needed this. Didn’t know about any of this until mid 20s. I’m upset but thank you ❤

    • @PiscesPrincess87
      @PiscesPrincess87 Рік тому +13

      I both agree/disagree this is one of those it starts at home subjects. Parents should have these conversations. However, I will point out that hygiene is a topic that is discussed in sex education but some parents are super against these classes.

    • @twothousandandchew
      @twothousandandchew 10 місяців тому

      uhm no … id feel so awkward if the adults who were there to educate me academically were talking to me about my vagina uhm no… that’s literally something parents should do… what next. we gonna teach the kids about drag queens in school? like no… teaching personal hygiene is. PERSONAL and should be between a parent and child i’d literally be SO fucking uncomfy if TEACHERS talked to me about that

    • @dariya1873
      @dariya1873 9 місяців тому +3

      @@twothousandandchewyou know what’s crazy. Drag queens are not a necessary topic but personal hygiene is. Let’s not forget not eveyrone has a loving family to talk to them about personal hygiene or their bodily functions. Schools are meant to educate students and I don’t see why just because a few people are uncomfortable about it, they shouldn’t teach them.

    • @lynsylva-bb6ss
      @lynsylva-bb6ss 9 місяців тому

      No shit, they to busy teaching gay sex.

  • @Mack2244
    @Mack2244 Рік тому +755

    Wow this really hit me. I hated myself for neglecting my hygiene … but when you’re at the lowest point of your life it seems so pointless to care for yourself. Thank you for helping me realize I’m not a total piece of sh*t. I don’t need to be told how gross I am.. I feel it.. I know it. My biggest struggle each day is getting out of bed and reaching my hygiene goals. Doing the smallest things every day feels like pushing a boulder uphill with where I’m at mentally.

    • @lyndaslocs
      @lyndaslocs Рік тому +41

      Please consider talking to a professional about this. WIth intervention, you can feel a lot bettter.❤

    • @clarasn40
      @clarasn40 Рік тому +50

      hi! i’d recommend watching a tedtalk called “how to do laundry when you’re depressed”, the speaker talks about how we should realize that not being able to do small tasks such as hygiene care some days does not make you a bad/gross person. hope you feel better❤ also talking to a professional could be really beneficial if you can!

    • @Mack2244
      @Mack2244 Рік тому +7

      @@clarasn40 thank you 😊

    • @waterflower4458
      @waterflower4458 Рік тому +5

      Me too ❤💕

    • @engelberthovel8566
      @engelberthovel8566 Рік тому +19

      This is so relatable… although I’m doing better emotionally now, hygiene can be a serious struggle. When I’m tired like that, it seems impossible to do things like wash my hair, there’s something about the repetitive motions and the change of environment from going into the shower that just sounds so exhausting.
      Don’t feel bad, it’s okay and you don’t need the be ashamed! Think about all the people throughout history that weren’t even depressed but just never washed because they didn’t feel like they needed to, I’m sure they were way less hygienic than you but no one in those cultures cared, and everyone just thought it was normal and found each other beautiful all the same.
      I remember one time I saw Plumbella saying that it’s ableist to make fun of people for struggling with hygiene, and I think she was totally right. Who freaking cares whether your hygiene is great or not? Yeah it’s fine to not think someone with low hygiene is super hot or whatever, but there’s no reason to think less of someone as a human being just because they’re not as hygienic as others. They’re not hurting you in any way by being less hygienic, and unless they’re exercising nearby I honestly doubt they even smell that bad at all, especially if they’re still using deodorant regularly

  • @ebonih7138
    @ebonih7138 Рік тому +716

    Growing up with a chronically depressed and emotionally absent single mom really has had an impact on my womanhood. You don’t know what you don’t know until you do and often that comes with ridicule and shame. People make so many assumptions on what the standard is and are out of touch with reality frfr.

    • @Lonelylovelywestindian
      @Lonelylovelywestindian Рік тому +34

      Same, i didnt thing about manicure, pedicure or even looking alright, i always looked raggedy, if only i knew back then maybe people would have not bullied so bad. Also the mother of my ex would give my soap and shit because maybe she thought i was too dirty for her raggedy ass son but it was the other way around. This guy barely washed and barely washed his teeth and anything. Shame on these people, god will vindicate me.

    • @queerlybelovdd
      @queerlybelovdd Рік тому +29

      me toooo!!! so much of what i learned about hygiene has come from a place of shame & self-consciousness. i remember once somebody pulled me aside and told me i was musty because i thought improperly washed clothes would air dry as i wore them. talk about humiliation🫣

    • @yougotgamesonyourphone6947
      @yougotgamesonyourphone6947 Рік тому +21

      @@Lonelylovelywestindian same here. Didn’t know how to properly wash vagina, good lotions and creams for the skin, keeping your nails and toes groomed(not necessarily done up), etc. didn’t really learn until I left home at 18

    • @mica8435
      @mica8435 Рік тому

      great point.

    • @IssaNessquick
      @IssaNessquick Рік тому +18

      Same here. I’m still learning at 23 and it just makes me feel just completely crappy

  • @zain6930
    @zain6930 Рік тому +613

    My momma wasn’t emotional or mentally available to teach me proper hygiene in middle school. Sadly I only learned bc I told I stunk by a lot of people. Being told that cuts you deep bc you just end up being a huge hygiene and germ freak.

    • @manher4335
      @manher4335 Рік тому +1

      Fix it. Honesty hurts some times but would you rather people talk under their breath about how pungent you smell? Scrub well and make sure your underarms don't smell like a bag of expired onions and your backside doesn't smell like limburger cheese.

    • @zain6930
      @zain6930 Рік тому +16

      @@manher4335 wym fix it did you read my whole comment this was all the way in middle school

    • @manher4335
      @manher4335 Рік тому

      It's not rocket science. Just bathe daily/appropriately and you'll be fine.

    • @galaxylucia1898
      @galaxylucia1898 Рік тому +22

      I’m sorry you went through that I hope you and your mom are doing better and living well. Much peace and light to you and your loved ones✨💗

    • @dollsucca
      @dollsucca Рік тому +9

      honestly same, its okay we were young

  • @tiyramclaughlin2493
    @tiyramclaughlin2493 Рік тому +420

    A rant? Girl this was an educated video essay. More please!

    • @cboy-ou2hr
      @cboy-ou2hr 4 місяці тому

      I don’t mean to expose many black men but a lot of them need the cleanliness of black women that shit don’t be making no sense how a grown as man can come in a building thinking he’s more masculine because he’s dirtier than you and your somehow more feminine because as a man you value personal grooming & cleanliness a weird social dynamic that plaques the black community indeed

  • @goodgrief888
    @goodgrief888 Рік тому +1444

    My white southern raised mother near constantly doused her nether regions with talcum powder that contained asbestos to prevent odor and WETNESS. As a consequence she did get ovarian cancer, which she didn’t tell her 4 daughters about because that would have meant that she would have to admit to having female genitalia. The fear of being caught having a vagina seems to have been a worse fate than actually having a functioning vagina, to women of a certain age and culture. Although my Mom was white, she had major issues with class and gender, and being from the south, I assume she was sent many of the same messages that black women were sent at the time. I can’t imagine what it must be like to try to have sexual relations with someone who won’t admit to wetness, and so therefor zero even natural lubrication.

    • @a_bookish_gemini
      @a_bookish_gemini Рік тому +201

      This whole story is so heartbreaking 😢

    • @paganpines
      @paganpines Рік тому +98

      When I was growing up, douche commercials were an everyday thing. I remember hyperscented pads and feminine sprays too, all coming with the same advertising: you smell "down there". Now that I've grown up and I know a few people who actually have hyperhydrosis, I'm glad that companies like Lume that offer a scent-free deodorant for the entire body, but it still feels like we're being told our genitals stink.

    • @a_bookish_gemini
      @a_bookish_gemini Рік тому +120

      @@paganpines I have Lumè ads blocked wherever I can - they try to be so witty and edgy but at the heart of it, they’re a HUGE part of the problem, perpetuating the notion of women being “unclean” by default and needing to “fix” the problem, which was never a problem to begin with. Take a shower, at least every other day, don’t put random shit in or near your vagina, and eat some fruit and veggies once in a while and you’re FINE. This obsession with hyper-sterilizing our lady parts is out of control.

    • @goodgrief888
      @goodgrief888 Рік тому

      @@paganpines Right? Like men are ever told their genitalia stinks, and yet we women are fully expected to gobble them all up like it’s the most delicious thing ever when you know some men aren’t even washing their balls in the shower for fear of “feeling gay” or something. But here we are in 2023 and still terrified that women’s bodies might have a natural odor. God forbid.
      I’m kinda of the belief that not shaving down there either is better as razor stubble is horrid. Lucky me my husband likes a full 80s bush, but even if he didn’t he’d just have to deal with it because I’m not going near my genitalia with a razor, depilatory cream, or lasers.

    • @aprilbennett4161
      @aprilbennett4161 Рік тому +14

      @@a_bookish_gemini The target audience of Lumè is both sexes, though.

  • @freetobree5323
    @freetobree5323 Рік тому +199

    I remember being in middle school.. “smelling like fish” was the worst thing you could be

    • @luvburden5743
      @luvburden5743 Рік тому +21

      That s hit was a horror, one of the worst feelings.

    • @helpmegetto10kwithnovideos81
      @helpmegetto10kwithnovideos81 Рік тому +1

      well yeah. fish is the top worst smell in the world

    • @kittydollsxo189
      @kittydollsxo189 Рік тому +11

      Yeah once I was funky at school , it was embarrassing and it wasn’t on purpose.

    • @Grimm_Butterfly
      @Grimm_Butterfly Рік тому

      I guess this is why I'm confused that this is being repackaged as a black Twitter thing. This happened in the whitest and most rural schools daily.

  • @LifeWithAri831
    @LifeWithAri831 Рік тому +328

    The comments are so refreshing. I love black women / women of all color. I love a safe space for us to talk and not be judge no matter what. I hope you ladies have an amazing year❤️ May everything you touch turn into prosperity 💕💕💕

    • @user-qf8hk2jn3w
      @user-qf8hk2jn3w Рік тому +7

      You too, hunny bun!!! ✨️♥️

    • @DsgSleazy
      @DsgSleazy Рік тому +3

      I only love black women.

    • @majalisiecka7443
      @majalisiecka7443 Рік тому +2

      ​@@DsgSleazy that is your right 👐

    • @greennumberthree
      @greennumberthree Рік тому +2

      I don’t want be a dark skin black woman anymore. Being in this body sucks. But I also don’t want to be anything else either. I end up doubling down on all my natural features. I don’t put make up, don’t alter my pictures to look lighter, don’t straighten my hair, use a wig or extensions, run away from the sun, force a higher voice pitch, walk or sit “lady like”, shave my legs, chin or “mustache”… I hate armpit hair on everyone. So, I do shave my armpits. I have natural gap teeth on my otherwise perfect set of teeth… I’m not planning to change that ever. And what is the result of me doubling down on my natural features? Racism, prejudice, forever single syndrome and still a virgin at 31. Life is awesome y’all. And I do these on top of not being perfect either. My looks objectively speaking are a 6.5 on a good day and a 4 normally (mostly because of my bad posture and mediocre understanding of style). I’ve come to accept my fate and have decided due to my own experience to not reproduce if I happen to get extremely lucky and finally meeting a man who sees some romantic worth in me. I honestly don’t know why I started writing this whole book down in the comment section. I’m sorry that I shared way too much about myself. I’m still gonna hit enter though.

    • @kitcowool
      @kitcowool Рік тому +3

      @@greennumberthree sis, your feelings are valid. But finding live is NOT off the table. You sound comfortable being you, now you just need the confidence. You can find it. Looks aren’t everything and even 1s and 2s find love. Look within yourself, love yourself more than ever… take the best care of yourself… go where you enjoy yourself the most… find hobbies that you enjoy…. and you will find love.

  • @jailadavis5638
    @jailadavis5638 Рік тому +289

    Thank you for highlighting the mental health aspect. I have ADHD and have been depressed since I was a young teen, and taking a shower is usually the hardest part of my day. I spend an hour hyping myself up for a 10 minute wash.
    It definitely doesn’t make it any better that I’m black, plus’s sized, and have hyperhidrosis.

    • @Urm0mz
      @Urm0mz Рік тому +22

      I thought I was the only one on this for so long.
      It is because water is hyper stimulating as it is something you use all 5 senses to experience. Because ADHD can have the issue of hyper focusing, too much stimulation cannot be enjoyable 😅
      I like to blare music so that I'm focused on the music and disassociate from the shower itself. Then it's just autopilot

    • @lavenderoh
      @lavenderoh Рік тому +19

      ​@@Urm0mzI feel the same. It wasn't until recently in my mid 30s I've found out I'm autistic. I also have asthma which has recently gone from mild to severe, so hot steamy showers make it hard to breathe. I was avoiding showers like the plague. I took a bath instead and found I loved it! Idk if that would work for you but for me it's great. I can manage getting in the shower to wash my PTA (pits, tits, ass😂) daily but it's a quick in and out. Every 3 days though I do my quick shower and then clean the tub and run a bath with bath salts and bubbles, light a candle, turn on a lamp instead of the big overhead light... I also have a little table beside my tub for my laptop so I can watch a movie or something. Now I love my baths and I get very annoyed if I can't have them lol

    • @jordynensor2081
      @jordynensor2081 Рік тому +8

      i feel you. once went 6 weeks without a shower. i try to be compassionate with myself about that cause i was in a horrible place mentally but man that was rough 😬

    • @lynsylva-bb6ss
      @lynsylva-bb6ss 11 місяців тому

      Yeah I guess would make it worse.

    • @LinnetPlacidPoetry
      @LinnetPlacidPoetry 9 місяців тому

      Girl.. shower....

  • @emmetharrigan5234
    @emmetharrigan5234 Рік тому +807

    I’d love to see how hygiene expectations also vary across sexuality

    • @LoveAndSnapple
      @LoveAndSnapple Рік тому +29

      Yes, I would also like to see this!

    • @AntoinetteChanel
      @AntoinetteChanel Рік тому +8

      Same!

    • @deebutterfly19
      @deebutterfly19 Рік тому

      THIS is the one. Because they shame women’s hygiene so bad and yet a lot of these mens balls smell like straight dookie juice. 🎯

    • @JustJ-Me
      @JustJ-Me Рік тому +5

      Agree!

    • @atinyevil1383
      @atinyevil1383 Рік тому +2

      That would be interesting.

  • @Marymackthequeenofwack
    @Marymackthequeenofwack Рік тому +430

    I don't know how or why this ended up in my feed but I'll add this: talk to your daughters about hygiene and most importantly, discharge and what's normal and what's not. My Mom did am excellent job of educating me on what was normal discharge and how to handle it but I learned really quickly that not all Mom's are comfortable with that conversation. My Mom was the go-to for most of my friends and female family members with questions about female hygiene because too many Mothers didn't talk to their daughters about it.

    • @nla5307
      @nla5307 Рік тому +40

      Wow I wish I was comfortable enough to ask my mom when I was younger or had a woman I could go to for any questions. I bet your friends really appreciated your mom and her wisdom.

    • @jfm14
      @jfm14 Рік тому +10

      You user handle is hilarious, especially next to Patrick Bateman there.

    • @psyolytesaille
      @psyolytesaille Рік тому +21

      Mine was all about keeping your period a secret. Didn't even want to help me out much and even hid the pack of pads in the shopping cart.

    • @bizbuildingwithsamarieraynee
      @bizbuildingwithsamarieraynee Рік тому +8

      Absolutely. My mother not once educated me on hygiene at all, even when I got my first period she didn’t even bother to help with that either. Someone else went and got me supplies. So when I see women who struggle with hygiene I know it’s possible that someone hasn’t taught them yet but luckily we can all learn through trial and error 🫶🏾

    • @krimezofkolor4683
      @krimezofkolor4683 Рік тому +1

      Yes my mama taught me early about personal hygiene . So blessed she showed me how to take care of myself . We have to help each other .

  • @aruallauraarual
    @aruallauraarual Рік тому +2231

    I as a white woman even noticed the intense shower routine of black female youtubers. Layering multiple soaps and shower gels etc. I find it relaxing and visually pleasing to see all the products. But I always think a simple look at actual founded research will tell you you really don’t need it. So it’s really interesting what the possible historical reason for it could be. Great video!

    • @BixbyLBC
      @BixbyLBC Рік тому +419

      The average black woman doesn't have an intense hygiene routine. The average black woman has her favorite bar soap and or shower gel, maybe some feminine wash and a body scrub to use once or twice a week. The hygiene Queens are just a YT trend that most of us love watching but in all honesty, we dont go out and buy all that crap....just keeping it 💯💯💯

    • @einhorntaschentuch9404
      @einhorntaschentuch9404 Рік тому +271

      @@BixbyLBC That’s why they said ‘Black female youtubers’. Reading comprehension?

    • @Nyyduhh
      @Nyyduhh Рік тому +34

      Def not listening to you 😅

    • @BixbyLBC
      @BixbyLBC Рік тому +174

      @@einhorntaschentuch9404 Yeah, but we all know that the stigma of what black women do on social media and television follows all black women, so it's highly likely that people will be inclined to think all or most black women have extreme hygiene practices like this. So, for good measure I decided to inform her that it was really for entertainment purposes because most of us dont subscribe to the "Hygiene Queen" ideology. Not sure why you're so pressed about it, but carry on....

    • @zeppelin_7245
      @zeppelin_7245 Рік тому +16

      ​​@@Nyyduhh Exactly! Of all people...😂😂

  • @CreepIt100
    @CreepIt100 Рік тому +159

    My mom died from ovarian cancer due to using J&J baby powder from the time she was a teenager. She came from a lower class family in a very rural area, so hygiene was very enforced in her family because everyone thought the poor coal miner and his family were unwashed and nasty. Thankfully she didn’t force the same level of hygiene on me. I’m a white woman, and I know I have a different experience in ways, but I do understand the situation very well.

    • @lynsylva-bb6ss
      @lynsylva-bb6ss 11 місяців тому +4

      It don't matter what race you are. Hygiene is something we all practice. Or not.

    • @twothousandandchew
      @twothousandandchew 10 місяців тому +21

      @@lynsylva-bb6ssyes but they clarified because this video is focused on black girls

    • @lynsylva-bb6ss
      @lynsylva-bb6ss 10 місяців тому +1

      @@twothousandandchew
      Yes, and that is strange.

    • @shippo4ever101
      @shippo4ever101 9 місяців тому +19

      @@lynsylva-bb6ss Did you even watch the video? Race does matter in this case bc it’s a collective experience that black women go through bc of OTHER black people enforcing a stigma on the THEIR bodies

  • @juelzm149
    @juelzm149 Рік тому +508

    Schools, jails, and prisons not providing basic feminine hygiene products is absolutely mind blowing! Like.. U provide toilet paper wtf.?!

    • @dinarusso3320
      @dinarusso3320 Рік тому +6

      No, I'm a white female and I did 2 years in jail many years ago and we would ask for 4,5 days for toilet paper!

    • @juelzm149
      @juelzm149 Рік тому

      @@dinarusso3320 also BS 🤬

  • @YounhaMizuki
    @YounhaMizuki Рік тому +1827

    As a brown-skinned Mexican, I can relate heavily to this video. It is important to mention my mom and my older sister are light-skinned. As a child, I used to sweat excessively because of my father. My mom constantly pressured me to be cleaner, sometimes making me feel bad about myself. My mom always told me I did not have proper hygiene. There were things that I could not control. The difference of skin did play a big role in how I saw myself because I was different from my mom and my sister. I would see the older women in my life as the standard of cleanliness that I would never be able to achieve. I don’t think anybody will read this but thank you for discussing the pressure that so many women face! ❤

    • @nebraskawaters8791
      @nebraskawaters8791 Рік тому +151

      My daddy sweats a lot too😅
      It's an unfortunate inheritance, we just be standing and start to sweat out of nowhere. I feel you, girl.

    • @cassandramackie4994
      @cassandramackie4994 Рік тому +47

      I read it and understand and am glad that you shared.

    • @YaLittleFriend
      @YaLittleFriend Рік тому +26

      Thank you for sharing!!!❤❤

    • @madgirl4eva1
      @madgirl4eva1 Рік тому +80

      Completely relate to this! My mom would do the same, complaining about my body sweat while she did the laundry. Still working on the shame that caused to this day.

    • @YounhaMizuki
      @YounhaMizuki Рік тому +34

      @@nebraskawaters8791 Honestly, I felt like I was the only one. I have the same problem with my dad. Lol, sweating was my superpower! 😩

  • @splicedsociety9221
    @splicedsociety9221 Рік тому +616

    Neurodivergency plays an important part of this as well. Im 24 and just now finding ways to maintain hygiene that don't stress me out or overwhelm me.

    • @alanabruno
      @alanabruno Рік тому +36

      What’s overwhelming about drinking water, taking your vitamins and washing your behind🥴

    • @whatsup9993
      @whatsup9993 Рік тому +52

      A bird bath can help until you decide to take a shower… taking time to wash your pits and other regions.

    • @PGOuma
      @PGOuma Рік тому +173

      ​@@alanabruno well if you have depression, you're not gonna be in the right mindset to even do all that but there's tons of different types of ways of being neurodivergent

    • @momama9146
      @momama9146 Рік тому

      @@alanabruno do some research on depression, (ADHD/autistic) burnout, domestic violence, brain regression, mental unwellnesa etc hope that helps with the question you ask...

    • @alanabruno
      @alanabruno Рік тому +17

      @@PGOuma you can literally wash up your body parts. I have a nephew who’s autistic and deals with sensory issues… WASH HIM AT THE SINK does the same job… yall finding every excuse to be musty🥴😭 ion like that at all. The times of social media I guess😬

  • @WhatsBliss
    @WhatsBliss Рік тому +557

    Thank you for making this video! I'm a white woman and I observed this whole phenomenon of "Hygiene Olympics" among black people on TikTok awhile ago. I felt like it had to be based in the racist maxim that "dark = dirty" but I felt unequipped to analyze and articulate it without bringing in my own biases.

  • @timiciagrant
    @timiciagrant Рік тому +1745

    This conversation is definitely needed to be had. The most obvious thing that isn't being addressed in this conversation is depression and mental health issues and the correlation to daily activities of living. Black people pretending that disability, mental health, financial restrictions, abuse, neglect and other issues can cause a decreased level of hygiene is very anti black. Because it doesn't allow for fragile human existence for black folks. I've been saying it's anti black to shame and make fun of people's smell/hygiene habits. It's all anti black and anti woman.

    • @mewmew6158
      @mewmew6158 Рік тому +125

      Yes, this is something people who've not experienced or acknowledged mental health problems miss a lot!

    • @alanabruno
      @alanabruno Рік тому +1

      It’s “anti black” for a mf to tell you it’s not okay to be musty? The black community doesn’t “pretend” that shit doesn’t exist but remember sweetheart that we’ve always had to work TWICE AS HARD to be at the same level as our counterparts and MANY of services that combatted said issues weren’t FOR US… so let’s not talk about “struggles” and what’s “anti black”… the slaves on the plantation washed their asses everyday and they were sold, raped, kidnapped and beaten… stop the bullshit💯

    • @Callimo
      @Callimo Рік тому +73

      @@BecomingShalom If you can, definitely see a doctor about any autoimmune issues. I'm glad it cleared up, but that's a very strange array of allergies to go through for so long.

    • @LoveAndSnapple
      @LoveAndSnapple Рік тому +96

      I agree. As someone who works in the mental health community Black people will just not allow themselves to be vulnerable enough to admit that they can’t always be clean every day. No matter what happens they still have to have the mental fortitude to maintain hygiene at 1000%.
      Black people will convince you that there is nothing terrible enough, nothing awful enough, nothing debilitating enough to prevent oneself from being clean. And at the same time want to be seen as just as vulnerable and human as everyone else. Black women don’t want to be labeled as strong superhero types, but wanting that means admitting that you’re just as human as everyone else and will exhibit behaviors of BEING human.

    • @miketyson9540
      @miketyson9540 Рік тому

      Seeing how victimized you are as a group is there Any way you arent oppressed? LOL As a white man enjoy watching your mental gymnastics. So sad to see you all become mental slaves tot he same left that has created a single mother rate of 80 percent in your community and took yo out of your homes and into section 8 housing. You even use all their vocabulary now its hilarious.

  • @aviparmy-lthatblinkedoncew774
    @aviparmy-lthatblinkedoncew774 Рік тому +642

    my grandmother told me the traumatizing story associated with her period health and feminine hygiene because of her grandmother ignorance because her grandmother assumed she was promiscuous for getting her period and how her family refused to help her learn personal hygiene

    • @incognito3599
      @incognito3599 Рік тому +70

      I am so sorry💓I hope she is at peace now..

    • @SJ_Vibezz
      @SJ_Vibezz Рік тому +110

      Same happened to my auntie in Jamaica and she was made to sleep under a table once her period started

    • @SamariJane
      @SamariJane Рік тому +52

      @@SJ_Vibezz omg???? WHY tho????

    • @blessednhiglyfavored465
      @blessednhiglyfavored465 Рік тому +102

      Same my great grandmother parents never talked to her about her reproduction system, period, nor even about sex. Wouldn’t even let her read books about it. She didn’t learn all that til she was in her late 20s and six kids later when she became a army nurse just a damn shame. She started talking to me about that stuff when I was 12 cause she wanted me to know early.

    • @FranSanTeeth90
      @FranSanTeeth90 Рік тому +4

      😢

  • @ayanna96111
    @ayanna96111 Рік тому +976

    I grew up in a Caribbean household and I remember my mother making us bathe in Dettol (which is a disinfectant) and wash with it during our periods. The being extra clean and having good hygiene is in the Black Caribbean culture too

    • @doeeyes2
      @doeeyes2 Рік тому +94

      Wow really? During the pandemic I made sure to wash my clothes with Dettol and ended up burning my hands... you useed that one ur ladybits?? 😳

    • @itsnaya9916
      @itsnaya9916 Рік тому +99

      @@doeeyes2 there is bath dettol that you can put a little into a bath you don’t put it on a wash cloth and shower with it

    • @doeeyes2
      @doeeyes2 Рік тому +12

      @@itsnaya9916 oh Ive need seen that before... ive only seen that anti-bacterial green liquid that is really strong. My mom makes a bottle of 3/4 aater, 1/4 vingar and a splash of Dettol... and uses th
      at as a housecleaner to wipe doen counter tops and stuff. I think I might have seen Dettol bar of soap now that I think of it. Still seems rather harsh to me... i guess it cuz of that chemical rash burn i gave myself

    • @itsnaya9916
      @itsnaya9916 Рік тому +8

      @@doeeyes2 I know what your talking about that would burn your kitty of 😭😭😭 but with the bar and bath one it’s great when your sick or on your period it’s not to be used everyday x

    • @cleoldbagtraallsorts3380
      @cleoldbagtraallsorts3380 Рік тому +28

      I'm white and British, and my mother did the same.

  • @TouchofShunshine
    @TouchofShunshine Рік тому +174

    Some of my classmates and I are 48-50 yrs old. I grew up abused and neglected. I started my period at 9 and didn't have or know about pads or anything. I came to school bloody and smelling of blood. No one, not even a teacher talked to me or helped me. Plus, my aunt used our money to buy drugs and men, so we didn't have water a lot. I admit that during elementary and early junior high I did come to school stinky at times. My brothers and I at times didn't have a place to lay our heads, food, or water, except for school lunches. My classmates to this day call me stinky. I am more successful than them, but they tell everyone who will listen that I don't bathe.

    • @peachmari
      @peachmari Рік тому +9

      🙏🏾💗

    • @Kap3lka
      @Kap3lka Рік тому +61

      Hey, it was not your fault.

    • @TouchofShunshine
      @TouchofShunshine Рік тому +29

      @@Kap3lka Thanks, I'm happy that I don't see them often. It's only one set of cousins who talk about me, everyone else is normal

    • @faithinallthingsw4088
      @faithinallthingsw4088 Рік тому +27

      You still standing sister and people will never understand the walk in another's shoes.

    • @MaryLou913
      @MaryLou913 Рік тому +10

      God I’m sorry. Tell them they better stick to grade school name calling because you’re balling now! I h8 people sometimes. Look how you came out on the other side of that! You should be proud of yourself!

  • @literallymonica5868
    @literallymonica5868 Рік тому +490

    There was a moment on twitter where people were saying if you wash your panties with the rest of your laundry it's nasty...? And to prewash them in the shower? That was beyond me.

    • @TinyToonStar
      @TinyToonStar Рік тому +168

      I only hand-wash my panties if I got my period. Any other occasion is a little bit of a stretch for me.

    • @melikaaziminia9522
      @melikaaziminia9522 Рік тому +111

      OK. It is a Middle Eastern woman of color, I wash my panties in the shower, but that’s just like a cultural thing? I don’t know where it comes from, but in my culture most girls tend to wash their bras and panties in the shower with soap? I also know that some people in the Dominican republic in the Caribbean do that as well.

    • @luccissimp7758
      @luccissimp7758 Рік тому +95

      I think that’s more of a cultural thing where some women in different cultures prefer to wash their underwear in the shower. It could be because of periods and they want to remove the slight blood stain but doing it everyday in the shower is a hassle .Regardless all panties should be thrown in the laundry for a final good clean because that’s essential.

    • @asseater2486
      @asseater2486 Рік тому

      @@TinyToonStar me too!!

    • @ahoee
      @ahoee Рік тому +52

      @@luccissimp7758 i’ve see a similar post where people were saying to prewash all used underwear, not just bloody ones. maybe it makes some sense if they are bloody, or have heavy discharge, but otherwise it really makes no sense if you have a working washing machine

  • @briolivia
    @briolivia Рік тому +993

    The craziness thing is how rare it is for seggsually active people to consider ...that peen is filthy. Celibacy and hydration has worked wonders for my PH

    • @MamaLinz123
      @MamaLinz123 Рік тому +64

      Ditto!!

    • @jfm14
      @jfm14 Рік тому +43

      Lmao, same.

    • @marcel3942
      @marcel3942 Рік тому +40

      There's a thing called condoms. Yall just out here letting anybody smash raw is crazy. Yall take no accountability in your own choices.

    • @marysupernova7780
      @marysupernova7780 Рік тому +229

      ​@@marcel3942semen isn't the only component creating chaos in pH. It would of course prevent most STD & pregnancy, & should be a priority. The entire vulva is still typically exposed to the dude's sweating pubic regions tho.

    • @dewilew2137
      @dewilew2137 Рік тому +1

      @@marcel3942 oh please. All men are filthy. This is not a “not all men” conversation. Come to think of it, this really isn’t a conversation for men at all, yet here you are. 🤔

  • @Shura4219
    @Shura4219 Рік тому +231

    As someone who has struggled with B.O throughout my teens and early twenties I can honestly say that all these feminine hygiene hacks are wack.
    Now I follow simple rules:
    1- no matter how clean it looks don't repeat dirty underwear
    2- no matter how clean it looks don't repeat a pad ( i know sometimes money is tight but its not worty it)
    3- no matter how clean it looks don't repeat dirty t-shirts (the bacteria on it will make you smell even worse)
    4- don't use fragrance on your vigina!
    5- take regular showers or at least wash the essentials.
    I really hate this talk about certain races smelling one way or another. If you don't wash or use deodorant you will smell irrespective of race. Sweaty armpits all smell the same to me, there is no specific black, white or asian smell. We should teach people how to take care of themselves instead trying to prove who has better hygiene practices.

    • @MonstehDinosawr
      @MonstehDinosawr Рік тому +14

      ❤️ love this comment, black people really have taught so many of us other races how to clean effectively for centuries.

    • @Earthlybeing396
      @Earthlybeing396 10 місяців тому

      @@MonstehDinosawryou’re definitely not a non black person commenting that. Get your racist black supremacist nonsense out of here

    • @phyllishammonds9400
      @phyllishammonds9400 10 місяців тому +2

      Amen

  • @trulydisappointed5142
    @trulydisappointed5142 Рік тому +415

    Such a great video once again. "If someone is depressed to the point of suicidal ideation, would it be surprising if they stopped giving a fuck about hygiene?" Indeed. 👏♥️

    • @jfm14
      @jfm14 Рік тому +7

      YES.

  • @d.s9798
    @d.s9798 Рік тому +367

    Growing up I was very insecure about my hygiene and it caused me to have depression. My mother would have me (7) and my sister (5) take a bath together. The water would only be a few inches high and the dirt never came off of me and I would be so itchy. I would scrape my leg and there would be a lot of dirt under my finger nail. She didn't allow us to take a shower individually because of the "water bill". We were also homeless for years after that and I didn't always get to shower. I ended up having bad hygiene practices in my teens up until I was 14. Those girls on UA-cam taught me so much about hygiene so now I'm very proactive when it comes to my hygiene. It's sad when I hear people say "didn't yall mom's teach you basic hygiene?". Mine did not unfortunately.😞

    • @sheilajohnson5511
      @sheilajohnson5511 Рік тому +33

      Wow, u really made me realize, just how much I took my Mom & her teachings for granted. Makes me wish u grew up with me & my sisters. Our mother was a nurse/midwife, who dotted on her daughters. She encouraged a simple routine of daily showers, keeping our face clean & moisturized, & definitely no products in our vaginas. I can happily say, I've never had a yeast infection!, ever!.

    • @jamiehulsey938
      @jamiehulsey938 Рік тому +3

      @@sheilajohnson5511 good for you I guess. It feels like you’re bragging

    • @sheilajohnson5511
      @sheilajohnson5511 Рік тому +15

      @@jamiehulsey938 Not at all, it's just that since my Mamacita is no longer with us.i'm realizing how very blessed me & my sisters were to have her.

    • @jamiehulsey938
      @jamiehulsey938 Рік тому +4

      @@sheilajohnson5511 i hope my children speak as highly of me one day.

    • @sheilajohnson5511
      @sheilajohnson5511 Рік тому +3

      @@jamiehulsey938 I'm sure they will.

  • @sabrinamitchell4107
    @sabrinamitchell4107 Рік тому +886

    In my experience I've noticed it was black women who like to insult other black women's hygiene. This girl I used to talk to had just randomly came out accusing me of having a body odor. I asked her what it was and she said she didn't know, but it was a "nauseating stench." I didn't smell anything on me and neither has anyone else smelled any weird odor from me after I asked them. But she claimed she did and she was telling "the truth" because thats what friends do, tell each other the truth. And she was smiling when she said it too. Her and I had an huge argument about that that night and I never spoke to her again. To me that is one of the most insulting things you could tell a person, it's not even funny. Don't insult me. I wash myself everyday.

    • @sabrinamitchell4107
      @sabrinamitchell4107 Рік тому +149

      @@fa9183 yeah see it wasn't any of that you just listed. She couldn't even tell me what it was. She just thought it would be funny to insult me. I would smell myself and clean up first before I ever let anyone else smell me.

    • @sabrinamitchell4107
      @sabrinamitchell4107 Рік тому +61

      @@fa9183 not if you don't ask. I never asked her. Now have I ever claimed her to be a friend. She put herself in that category. And how would you know people are used to their own smell?

    • @HeidiSholl
      @HeidiSholl Рік тому +129

      @@fa9183 I feel like this only counts if you smell like that most of the time. I don't know what my natural smell is, but I 100% know when I smell of BO! And I can 100% tell what all the different, non-normal smells are like on my feet and breath and such. The only people I know of who have any kind of permanent noticeable smell really are either people who use a strong scented products frequently, or people who you know probably haven't washed in weeks, usually for very sad reasons. Unless you're sticking your nose on someone, you probably won't notice their smell. The majority of people you come across day to day have no noticeable smell.

    • @HeidiSholl
      @HeidiSholl Рік тому +44

      @@fa9183 Generally just getting into the smell chat 😂 Food smells I find commonly stick to your clothes more than they do to you. Although I know that if you eat a lot of garlic or onion you can actually sweat out the smell hours later 😂 From personal experience, I've only found that with onion. I've got a hypersensitive sense of smell (according to my therapist anyway), and I can usually smell quite a lot of things before other people can, but the main offender honestly is alcohol. You can smell that on someone a mile off!
      Anyway, I work in customer service, so I meet many many people every day, and most of the time the smells I notice strongly are bo or perfumes. Everything else is generally quite neutral.
      Men who complain about female genitalia scents though, I take issue with. Everyone with female genitalia has a smell, and as long as it's not pungent it's not a problem. I've only known one person in my life who had a smell where people told her she should really see a doctor for it, and it turns out she had a few things going on. Women also smell different depending on where they are in their cycle, it's completely natural, and usually (from what I've been told) smells quite nice. I think some guys just assume women shouldn't smell of anything, which is ceazy! Men who have a problem with the natural smell of women need to look in the mirror because semen is definitely stronger, and definitely less pleasant. Especially when you know it's gone stale 🤢

    • @HeidiSholl
      @HeidiSholl Рік тому +19

      Also, on the topic of smells generally, for feet, leather shoes. Never plastic, never never plastic. Especially not in wet weather. If you get smelly feet in plastic shoes, those plastic shoes will basically fuse themselves to the smell, whereas leather will return to smelling like leather after a couple of days, without needing to spray or wash or anything. Literally just avoid anything plastic on your feet because it A) gives you athletes foot much easier than anything else and b) will retain all bad smells. C) In my experience, actually makes your feet smell worse because they can't breathe as well. My teenage years were very much a time of discovery when it came to shoes 😂

  • @Mizzdianadymond
    @Mizzdianadymond Рік тому +306

    My step mom was a firm believer in douching and made sure I douched after my monthly. Once I got a real long lasting yeast infection and she took me to the ob-gyn. Doc told her I shouldn’t be douching because it was washing away my good bacteria. Needless to say I never saw a douche in the bathroom ever again. Now I have a 14 year old daughter and we had a conversation about good vaginal hygiene and PH balance. Thank you for making this video🎉

    • @MyrakaWilliams
      @MyrakaWilliams 11 місяців тому +2

      I’ve always told to that growing up Plus with soap inside 😭as soon as I got sexually active at 15 I’m going on 18 now but literally I literally started noticing all the signs I’m starting break off the habit, but our parents literally don’t know what the hell they be talking about 😭

    • @Catalina-Winemixer
      @Catalina-Winemixer 11 місяців тому

      @@MyrakaWilliams Girly please. Your vagina is self-cleaning, it lubricates itself for a reason. It only needs water and mild soap on the outside. All of your ph issues will go away.

    • @carrie9716
      @carrie9716 10 місяців тому

      /😊

    • @twothousandandchew
      @twothousandandchew 10 місяців тому

      @@MyrakaWilliamsyeah… ur vagina cleans its self by discharge you don’t need to shoot up water and soap in there… that’s not healthy…

  • @vmlksm9
    @vmlksm9 Рік тому +905

    I take pride in cleanliness as a black woman. I love my scented oils, lotions, & perfumes. Most other BW I know, also smell really good. My boss (who is an older WM) jokes that he can always tell when me & my other black female coworkers are around because it’s smells like vanilla, coconut, & desserts! Lol Also when I date men of other races I notice they always point out how soft my skin is & how good I smell.
    So I think it’s great that we take so much pride in our hygiene. But I don’t think we should make a toxic competition out of it either. If someone wants to just use soap & water & leave it at that. That’s perfectly fine ❤

    • @viviantoblerone
      @viviantoblerone Рік тому +85

      This is such a nice positive comment ❤

    • @vmlksm9
      @vmlksm9 Рік тому +13

      @@viviantoblerone Awe Thankyou 🥰💜

    • @therealmccoy2004
      @therealmccoy2004 Рік тому +39

      Girl u masking behind fragrant scents. That don't make u clean lol

    • @vmlksm9
      @vmlksm9 Рік тому +264

      @@therealmccoy2004 You clean your body before adding fragrance. That’s common sense

    • @lily5952
      @lily5952 Рік тому +109

      ​@@vmlksm9 you got the obligatory misogynistic comment lol

  • @serenaofvenus
    @serenaofvenus Рік тому +285

    i want to add that I wasn't taught about hygiene because I was neglected as a child. There were many times while I was a little girl where I was responsible for bathing myself, dressing myself, getting myself ready for school, and even washing my clothes. I was never given formal education about how to properly clean any part of my body or care for my hair. My parents just held a toothbrush at me and expected me to take care of myself without much instruction. I wasn't even provided floss or conditioner until I discovered and requested them. Everything I know about haircare, skin care, or even how to properly wash my body or care for my teeth and gums was slowly accumulated throughout high school and is still on going. It is difficult for me to feel the need to even take care of myself sometimes, because I was never given that love as a girl. I have better habits surrounding caring for my daughter. She is always in clean clothes, with hair done and teeth brushed even as a toddler. I cannot say the same for myself. Informative hygiene videos have helped me and still continue to do so today.

    • @krischambers9021
      @krischambers9021 Рік тому +5

    • @Luckimee
      @Luckimee Рік тому +14

      This is literally my story. I literally wasn't taught anything

    • @revenge0lobster
      @revenge0lobster Рік тому +2

      I’m so sorry you went through that 💕

    • @XHeartCriztalx
      @XHeartCriztalx Рік тому +6

      I had parents like this too. Taught me NOTHING, expected me to know everything. That's not how any of this works. Some people think you pop out a kid and boom, the work is done. Nothing left to do right, because they can take care of themselves?? No!! 🙄 Then they would get so angry with me when I wouldn't wear deodorant, or found bras uncomfortable and hated them. They thought I was 'rebelling' against then like give me a break... I was clueless, with social practices and general hygiene upkeep NEVER explained to me, so why are you getting mad when I don't understand the right times to implement them? Some parents didn't deserve to be parents for real. This stuff goes waaaay back for some people.

    • @lemonslove-lc5tm
      @lemonslove-lc5tm Рік тому +2

      OMG! I hope you understand that it was a failure on the part of your parents and not your failure. I hope you now have peace and love ❤

  • @makaylataft1545
    @makaylataft1545 Рік тому +483

    Growing up, i was neglected as a child. I use to get bullied so bad for having poor hygiene. I didn’t have a mother to teach me about the importance of personal hygiene & the functions of the vagina. I only washed with what was available to me, not knowing the consequences of putting foreign products near my vagina. as I got older, I did all I could do to “mask” the odor but nothing really worked. Couldn’t afford going to the OBGYN. I even had someone I was absolutely in love with tell me that my weight was the cause of my odor. Here it is; post college, 25 and I finally got my shit together but man 😪 had I known this & was taken care of properly as a child / pre teen. It would have save me from a lot embarrassment & emotional trauma.

    • @TradBarbie
      @TradBarbie Рік тому +40

      Same here. My parents taught me nothing and I was bullied so badly that I often thought of ending it so they'd all feel bad.

    • @hz1823
      @hz1823 Рік тому +29

      Same here. My mother made sure to teach me how to put on makeup and shave every inch of body hair but she never taught me how to clean my vulva properly or take care of feminine hygiene, or even how to brush my teeth properly. I still practiced basic hygiene but always wondered why I suffered with certain things and people looking at me like I was dirty. It was horrible and I had to learn all of those things myself when I had access to the internet. I think mothers like this don't deserve to be mothers. If you have a daughter it is your duty to teach her about the female body and how to take care of it. I'm glad that you are doing better now.

    • @L.W..
      @L.W.. Рік тому +8

      Aww I’m so sorry you experienced that. The good news is, now you know and that’s all that’s matters 💛

    • @modica36jerkin
      @modica36jerkin Рік тому +19

      This same thing happened to me I was bullied in grade school but my parents where not fit. And immature so I wasn’t taught to wash properly until my grandparents taught me (that wasn’t until they realized my parents weren’t teaching me though.) my smell is something I’m still paranoid about today. And I have a very clean and simple routine. I know I smell great now but it’s always in the back of my mind especially when I’m in a place I’m uncomfortable

    • @Lexxulv
      @Lexxulv Рік тому +2

      I’m so sorry

  • @Yeahmorgs
    @Yeahmorgs Рік тому +45

    I have depression so it’s hard to take a shower or brush my teeth a lot of days

    • @inmyOWN_world
      @inmyOWN_world Рік тому +3

      It's such a challenge every day to do

  • @tacrewgirl
    @tacrewgirl Рік тому +817

    So many facts. I figured it had to do with racism and classism.

    • @MISSMADISONMEDIA
      @MISSMADISONMEDIA Рік тому +45

      It’s almost as if, when we turn our backs on people in our same group, thinking we’re better than them for some silly reason… it’s always about classism and racism🤯🤯🤯😱🤯

    • @zebraskin
      @zebraskin Рік тому +13

      And capitalism

    • @AriessunvirgomoonlightLibraise
      @AriessunvirgomoonlightLibraise Рік тому +6

      I wash my AZZ 2 times a day no matter what, an many more that day depending how hot it was or cold I am but idc what time of day I'ma take 2

    • @bmwjourdandunngoddess6024
      @bmwjourdandunngoddess6024 Рік тому

      Same.

    • @meme-fs1jn
      @meme-fs1jn Рік тому +6

      Colorism tooo

  • @DrJessicaKatanga
    @DrJessicaKatanga Рік тому +230

    Black doctor and content creator in the UK here! - This was an AMAZING video - liked and subscribed x

  • @LasPhoenix777
    @LasPhoenix777 Рік тому +59

    My own dermatologist told me to only wash my under arms my under boobs and my groin/butt/inner thigh area. She said the only reason I would need to wash arms legs back stomach is if they got dirty, but regular day-to-day living doesn’t make them dirty. my severe eczema is gone. Her advice helped.

    • @christinepoppy3277
      @christinepoppy3277 Рік тому +7

      Same here! I started showering less and my skin is thanking me .Your skin is an organ and should be treated like one, not like a piece of plastic.

    • @dddddangel
      @dddddangel Рік тому +3

      Same! No need to scrub your arms and legs with soap.. just makes my skin dry and itchy..

    • @maramra393
      @maramra393 Рік тому

      I don't believe that's true since I'm moroccan and we use special soap and wash gloves that get rid of dead skin cells. I can assure you legs and arms are the parts where you get the most dead skin cells out .

  • @blackhealthlit
    @blackhealthlit Рік тому +93

    This is much-needed information for Black women, I've been saying for years that the hygiene "standard" for us is making us sick and killing us.

    • @lynsylva-bb6ss
      @lynsylva-bb6ss 11 місяців тому +2

      In what way are black women sick and dying from hygiene? I don't understand.

    • @samaraisnt
      @samaraisnt 10 місяців тому

      ^ douching and poisoning bodies with constant chemical products in human’s most sensitive area. In what way were women not poisoned by J&J when it gave them cervical cancer? That part. Not even mentioning chemical treatments for the hair and bleach cream. That’s off the dome but then I listen and have common sense. 💅🏽

  • @Joyce-ry4kd
    @Joyce-ry4kd Рік тому +681

    I'm in middle school and this doesn't stop. With the pointing out of smell and hygiene. Like a girl would walk into a room and say "it smells like ass" or whisper to their friends and say "this girl's pussy stank" it tires me out and make me scared that they might spread a rumour about me. The society have gotten worse over the years.

    • @umbellicalchick5635
      @umbellicalchick5635 Рік тому +208

      It's worse in middle school than any other time of your life. Hang in there.

    • @bivianaromero7083
      @bivianaromero7083 Рік тому +126

      I always thought middle school was harder than high school. Please stay true to yourself. I used to feel that way too. They’d say the same comments around me. It took me 10 years to learn to be strong and stand up for not only others but also myself. I usually put myself last. It’s a bad habit. You’re so strong for even talking about this.

    • @troi6500
      @troi6500 Рік тому +66

      Come up with comebacks. Your intellect is your weapon.

    • @troi6500
      @troi6500 Рік тому

      Girls who are bullies in middle school end up insecure, unhappy adults. They’re followers.. not leaders.

    • @Joyce-ry4kd
      @Joyce-ry4kd Рік тому

      @@troi6500 The thing is if someone talks about me I don't wanna make a issue out of it cause all girls wanna do now is fight.

  • @SomeRandomBlackWoman
    @SomeRandomBlackWoman Рік тому +110

    I didn’t see anyone discussing bladder issues/incontinence. I have a leaky bladder and it was hard growing up because no one else seemed to have this issue. I was the Black girl who had a smell even though I’d been seeing urologists and gynecologists since the age of 7. I was told to not get surgery before having children as it would more than likely reoccur. Then lawsuits started about mesh slings and supports for bladders causing internal bleeding made me scared. My vaginal health was fine but I was trying all the remedies and ways I could to not smell like pee while leaking pee. I wasn’t bullied but a couple Black girls did make comments and they stuck with me for a long time. Black folx have no mercy or kindness for each other and wonder why the community is in shambles.

    • @octoscorpion2506
      @octoscorpion2506 Рік тому +10

      I have bladder leakage issues too. Have you ever tried "interlabial pads"? Instead of regular pads that sit in your underwear, interlabial pads are leaf shaped or a rounded diamond shape and you fold them in half and tuck in between your labia. That way they are right at the opening of your urethra to absorb any urine as soon as it drips out. They are quick and easy to change and more discrete than regular pads. There are disposable ones and reusable washable cloth ones.

    • @bbrooklynnbaby
      @bbrooklynnbaby Рік тому +3

      if you ever are able to try, i suggest using a pad. thin or medium, and keep a few in your bag in case. it at least spares the smell and gives time to maybe go to the restroom every so often to change it out. :)

  • @sanchiacharles7172
    @sanchiacharles7172 Рік тому +336

    I developed OCD after experiencing trauma and one of the first things I experienced is feeling unclean and dirty and needing to wash myself. Not because I was dirty, but I felt like I was defective in some way. I do believe the trauma in the black community attributes to our need to feel "clean" all of the time but many don't realise it's actually psychological.

    • @yin4296
      @yin4296 Рік тому +18

      Yeah I would agree that adds another layer of depth to the issue. I grew up in the south but I’m white, I remember a few of my black friends’ moms teaching me better hygiene (not that my parents neglected it, we just didn’t use things like moisturizers and I didn’t really have a habit of changing my towels/wash cloths enough). But I never was obsessed with it until my OCD really started kicking in around the time I was 16. When I’m feeling to tired to shower, my OCD makes it significantly worse to the point where I feel defective and like I deserve to feel this way bc I’m gross for not showering after one day of not sweating. It sucks, I would feel even worse for people who have the same struggles but live in an active community that makes you feel guilty for not maintaining a perfect top tier hygiene routine everyday.

    • @MrBUGS713
      @MrBUGS713 Рік тому +1

      What trauma are you speaking of

    • @christinepoppy3277
      @christinepoppy3277 Рік тому +11

      @@yin4296 I have ocd too and one thing that has helped me is realizing there is a limit to how “clean” a human body can get. Like you’re not a piece of plastic that can be wiped clean with bleach, you’re a living organism that has living bacteria on you all the time. Bathing once a day, or even every other day, and following basic hygiene habits are great, but taking 10 showers a day (as I used to do when my ocd was at its worst) is only going to give you dry irritated skin and make you more prone to infections. I feel that the “hygiene police” need to understand that obsessive cleanliness can be caused by psychological issues, that can be highly distressing to individuals, and there’s a balance to be had between teaching good habits, but not shaming.

    • @embroideredragdoll
      @embroideredragdoll Рік тому +8

      @@MrBUGS713 that’s not really something you’re entitled to know even if you think you have helpful insight for it.

    • @yin4296
      @yin4296 Рік тому

      @@christinepoppy3277 it's not a "I'm not clean enough" thing and more of a "I know maintaining good hygiene is essential to health and I must be the worst for not even keeping a basic habit like showering every night," your comment could definitely help others though

  • @mommalion7028
    @mommalion7028 Рік тому +158

    I had a black room mate in college for literally a week and a half because she kept calling me nasty because I didn't change my bed sheets everyday like she did. I was like 'you're insane and OCD.' If only this video existed back then, I would have understood the vast cultural chasm between us and maybe not taken her reaction to my white hygiene habits so personally. (I did shower everyday but didn't do anything special besides that, there were video games to play.)

    • @LifeisaBeautifulting
      @LifeisaBeautifulting Рік тому +147

      Changing sheets every day is crazy, who even has the time

    • @queencleopatra007
      @queencleopatra007 Рік тому +106

      Changing sheets every day is not a black thing. Your roommate might have actually had OCD or something.

    • @Earthlybeing396
      @Earthlybeing396 10 місяців тому +16

      Definitely not a cultural difference just a personal one. Had nothing to do with you being white or her being black. She probably was racist and didn’t like white people so she looked for a valid excuse to change roommates

    • @shizukagozen777
      @shizukagozen777 10 місяців тому +5

      ​@@queencleopatra007
      I have OCD and I don't do that. 😅😂😂

    • @shizukagozen777
      @shizukagozen777 10 місяців тому

      ​@@Earthlybeing396
      Fr

  • @Brando-6200
    @Brando-6200 Рік тому +97

    This was dope! As a black man from Texas, my mother's cardinal rules were never leave the house without taking a shower, always have on clean underwear on, and the most important one of all never get in bed without bathing. Til this day I can't sleep if I haven't taking a shower. This video makes perfect sense.

  • @LisaSimpsonsHomeGirl
    @LisaSimpsonsHomeGirl Рік тому +202

    There are two other reasons women get yeast and vaginal infections are wiping from back to front instead of the way around and washing down there with soap. I realize some people aren’t educated and I agree need more resources. I would love for the next topic to be about black women and nail trends like how Flo Jo did her nails.

    • @Chemicaldessert
      @Chemicaldessert Рік тому +41

      You don't get yeast infections from this practice, but it can cause bv. Ecoli from the bowels proliferate and cause infection.

    • @PGOuma
      @PGOuma Рік тому +42

      And also from douching so if people claim that black women smell fishy down there, it could be due to all the douching and other harsh chemicals that they are putting down there

    • @jfm14
      @jfm14 Рік тому +20

      Some kinds of soap are usually okay, but it should be something gentle and have the proper pH, with little to no fragrance.

    • @dewilew2137
      @dewilew2137 Рік тому +1

      @@PGOuma yes, but that was discussed in the video already.

    • @maddie19
      @maddie19 Рік тому +1

      YES TO ALL OF IT! I stopped using soap on my lady bits about 2 months ago and I never realized how much it was effecting my body. This may sound dramatic, but I no longer feel like I’m constantly fighting with my body to feel clean, it just is. I accidentally used soap down there the other day and wouldn’t you know my PH has been off ever since and I’m mad at myself

  • @d.n.9909
    @d.n.9909 Рік тому +747

    My black Mexican grandmother taught me that showering with hot water was killing the microbiome on the skin and to only wash my privates daily in morning and night but hair and the rest of body was washed 2-3times a week. Unless I got dirty that day doing work or sweating of course. She claimed that eating right would make my body odor pleasant and coconut oil and shea butter or cocoa butter on skin was better than chemical products. 🤷🏻‍♀️ I still do it her way and my husband of 11yrs doesn’t complain

    • @tamikad3535
      @tamikad3535 Рік тому +43

      How do you wash your privates daily but not the rest of your body? Just with a washcloth? I want to start using coconut oil as a moisturizer for my skin.

    • @peonycrystal
      @peonycrystal Рік тому +17

      My grandma (mexican) does the same.

    • @d.n.9909
      @d.n.9909 Рік тому

      @@tamikad3535
      Yes, walk in tub get my wash cloth wet with water and pure Castile soap. Wash my face, breasts, armpits and bottoms. My body does get wet but I do not focus on the rest at all with soap. When I completely shower I use a exfoliate gloves and sugar or salt scrub. Never conditioner because my hair falls out more with that I noticed. Also, I use a boar brush everyday to get the natural oils on scalp spread to the strands to avoid build up and dryness. I have wooden combs to help de tangle. Organic extra virgin unrefined coconut oil and sometimes mixed with other oils like almond, jojoba and castor ext…

    • @d.n.9909
      @d.n.9909 Рік тому +1

      @@peonycrystal
      I don’t understand your question

    • @mya.xoxo_
      @mya.xoxo_ Рік тому

      they’re no studies that prove hot water (unless boiling) kills more bacteria than cold water. your grandmother lied to you.

  • @Lime1958
    @Lime1958 Рік тому +39

    In Asia we have the same problem. It comes down to colorism. Here, if you're tan dark skin, you dont look "clean" so you are expected to at least smell as good as a bouquet of flowers even in a tropical humid summer.

    • @V_4_Versace
      @V_4_Versace 6 місяців тому

      Which parts of Asia is this? When I lived in Korea it was hard to even find actual cleaning products because they have some gene where they don’t sweat or stink so it’s literally not even a conversation unless it was brought up that white people smell weird because they do sweat etc

  • @Sweet_Dee
    @Sweet_Dee Рік тому +181

    Great video! I'm a white woman who grew up in a neglectful household and was never taught a lot of things regarding hygiene growing up. So as a teen/young adult, I looked to other people in my life and online to learn how to actually take care of myself. And MANY of said people were black women! Learning that a collective fixation on hygiene is actually rooted in defying racist stereotypes explains a lot, and is really heartbreaking. I just want to give a shout-out to all of the wonderful black women who have educated me on both hygiene AND history.

    • @yeahyeahwowman8099
      @yeahyeahwowman8099 11 місяців тому

      I'm so sick of white women pandering, jesus christ😂

  • @ladawnecopeland3749
    @ladawnecopeland3749 Рік тому +160

    My mother never told me about hygiene. I was so dirty in middle school, they sent me home and called DCF on my mom.

    • @dewilew2137
      @dewilew2137 Рік тому +10

      ♥️♥️♥️

    • @QueenMufasa552
      @QueenMufasa552 Рік тому +40

      Same here. My mum was way too busy to sit me down and talk to me about hygiene and when the time came for her to actually have time for me, she passed. Had to learn on UA-cam.

    • @traplotus
      @traplotus Рік тому +4

      🤯🥺😭

    • @MS-bn3rg
      @MS-bn3rg Рік тому +12

      I'm sorry this happened to you

    • @honeyvoss1477
      @honeyvoss1477 Рік тому +14

      Same. My mother never taught me proper hygiene practices.

  • @urmibhatt8276
    @urmibhatt8276 Рік тому +118

    This video hit me, i’m not black but i am indian and due to my race we often get stereotyped as “dirty/ smelly”. I noticed that i definetly have a fixation on cleanliness and smelling good. I like literally only wear most clothes once before washing them, and on days i don’t shower/ wash my hair i feel gross (even if i didn’t do anything). I do know it’s a stereotype for indians to have oily hair so i used to literally wash my hair everyday, luckily now i’m at every 2 days so it’s a lot better than before. But this video was a great introspection on a lot of things i didn’t even know about societal expectations and how that impacts black womens and even other poc on their own hygiene

    • @gomoestas
      @gomoestas Рік тому +18

      A stereotype that insults Indian hair is so sad, you guys literally have amazing hair. Full, thick, strong. It's the hair that sells on fake hair market. It's so obviously the jealousy of the colonizer.

    • @LucielStarz123
      @LucielStarz123 Рік тому +7

      Indian eats a lot of curry and heavily spiced food, so of course you’d smell because of that.
      It’s not a stereotype if it’s true unless your family eats lightly spiced cuisine like Japanese

    • @orsikocs
      @orsikocs Рік тому +8

      I was waiting at a medical centre last week and a west asian family sat down next to me. I could smell the spices n it kind of made me smile. The adult son was taking care of his mom. I was thinking probably she’s making fresh meals for the family every day. All I’m saying is that not all smells are unpleasant. It was kinda heartwarming. I wished a little to smell like curry too 😊

    • @みゆき-s6g6x
      @みゆき-s6g6x Рік тому +10

      @@LucielStarz123 Japan? The land of fried food and grilled fish? I can assure you, you can smell that too...

    • @LucielStarz123
      @LucielStarz123 Рік тому +5

      @@みゆき-s6g6x You can smell it when you’re eating at the place, or residual scent on clothes , but not as like an actual pungent stench from the sweat. A train ride on Japan versus a train ride in India are two entirely different planets

  • @xMissPegasusx
    @xMissPegasusx Рік тому +62

    I had a black male professor in university that loudly preached to the (90% female) class about the importance of douching. This was only a few years ago. I was infuriated by it, it still bothers me to this day.

    • @nadjak3410
      @nadjak3410 11 місяців тому +22

      That wasn't only wrong, but also super inappropriate tbh.

    • @lynsylva-bb6ss
      @lynsylva-bb6ss 11 місяців тому

      Sounds like a perv.
      He has no business talking to women about anything private.

    • @MarieAntoinetteandherlittlesis
      @MarieAntoinetteandherlittlesis 10 місяців тому +7

      What the hell kind of professor was he?? Also- not a smart one.

  • @Blessed_Sound
    @Blessed_Sound Рік тому +169

    I remember back when the pandemic started, I used to stay home a lot since we couldn’t go out, so I would end up not taking a shower for like 2-4 days straight (I’d just clean the small areas on my body that would need to be cleaned), and I never forgot, whenever my mom would hug me, she said “Wow, you I smell like a baby.” And now that I’m thinking about it, it makes sense, becuase babies usually don’t get baths/showers all the time, they just get certain areas that need to be cleaned cleaned, and if they needed a bath, they got one.

    • @uliitssummerok3173
      @uliitssummerok3173 Рік тому +13

      Yes 👏! The baby smell is a real thing when you leave your skin alone really. I couldn’t agree more 😊

    • @dangsood4945
      @dangsood4945 Рік тому +22

      I've been doing this all my life and nobody has ever told me I smell. Just a shower when my hair needs washing and spot cleaning necessary areas daily. Saves water and keeps clean. The skin is an organ - it does best with less imo

    • @loumeep
      @loumeep Рік тому +9

      My mum used to love smelling my neck in the mornings. This would be the reason why ❤

    • @lisa_wkw2046
      @lisa_wkw2046 Рік тому +4

      Yeah I do the same. I shower all three days when I have to wash my hair and wash myself normally everyday under the arms and down there.
      It saves so much time and water, and I still never smell bad!

    • @christinepoppy3277
      @christinepoppy3277 Рік тому +5

      I have really dry skin and my doctor suggested I don’t bathe every day when I’m not working out and my skin is way more soft and feels really clean. I still wash my face once a day, my armpits and my groin, but everything else I leave. And I only use cleanser in those areas and shampoo in my hair when I shower. I don’t need to scrub my legs and other parts of body. I also use moisturizers with chemical exfoliants which are way more gentle on your skin then mechanical exfoliation

  • @jannahugheshickey4114
    @jannahugheshickey4114 Рік тому +261

    Being a woman is hard, being a black woman is even harder. Life is difficult enough without worrying that you smell like a person. Thank you for making this video!

    • @inmyOWN_world
      @inmyOWN_world Рік тому +3

      So true!!!! I say this all the time

    • @scruffyo4460
      @scruffyo4460 Рік тому +2

      You’re black??

    • @jannahugheshickey4114
      @jannahugheshickey4114 Рік тому +5

      @@scruffyo4460 no?

    • @scruffyo4460
      @scruffyo4460 Рік тому +1

      @@jannahugheshickey4114 you wrote that comment as if you are a black woman so I was confused.

    • @jannahugheshickey4114
      @jannahugheshickey4114 Рік тому +13

      @@scruffyo4460 no, I’m not, but I understand life is more difficult as a POC

  • @tavern2468
    @tavern2468 Рік тому +1058

    Weird opinion: I feel like most people who claim they fully wash more than once a day every single day are lying and want to feel superior and simultaneously shame others for falling short of washing frequently and also never want to be accused of being dirty/ unworthy. It’s amazing to hear how common it is for people to admit that daily hygiene is exhausting or not easy because of a series of circumstances. Also summers eve is terrible. I’ve used a stainless steel bar of “soap” and it really cleans you.

    • @tammibrown5074
      @tammibrown5074 Рік тому +200

      Alot of people i Know including myself fully wash twice a day, theres no other way, esp when you live in a tropical country

    • @tcdecatur2077
      @tcdecatur2077 Рік тому +77

      Why would someone lie about this? 😂

    • @JukuduB
      @JukuduB Рік тому +6

      ​@@tammibrown5074 💯💯💯💯

    • @cjohnson_
      @cjohnson_ Рік тому +1

      😂😂😂😂 wo has to lie about washing their ass more than once a day

    • @calmccabe3202
      @calmccabe3202 Рік тому +73

      stainless steel "soap"??? You not tryna say castille, right? What is stainless steel soap

  • @olilumgbalu5653
    @olilumgbalu5653 9 місяців тому +18

    I'm a black woman and I shower about every 3 days or so. That's because I mostly don't leave the house so I don't see any need to as the only person I could potentially be offending is myself. I shower just before going out about 90% of the time. The other 10% of the time, I shower the French way. 🤫

    • @lynsylva-bb6ss
      @lynsylva-bb6ss 9 місяців тому +4

      Nothin wrong with that. If your not going out what difference does it make.

    • @allisoncarroll1284
      @allisoncarroll1284 4 місяці тому +2

      There is no problem with that. If I'm going to be inside all day in the air conditioning, I don't bother to shower. If no one is around, no one is going to be bothered by it.

    • @mukaniwatkins2598
      @mukaniwatkins2598 2 місяці тому

      Same

  • @charlesecarmichael2510
    @charlesecarmichael2510 Рік тому +47

    I'm mixed race (African American and White). One of my coworkers is a Jamaican lady, and she always makes comments about how I should be showering at least 2-3 times a day. I take a shower every night as well as my daughter. She suggests showering at night, when you wake up the next morning, and every time after you poop. This obsession with cleanliness in our community is crazy.

    • @kozuyoko7028
      @kozuyoko7028 Рік тому +5

      i shower when i wake up in the morning and night, and only skip when i am sick
      but after you poop is wild 😞

    • @84tahlia
      @84tahlia Рік тому +3

      I live in Belize and the states. Jamaica’s weather is just like ours. When I’m in Belize itself normal to take 2 or 3 showers because of the humidity. So that’s why she’s saying that and it’s ingrained. However, here in the states I take 1 shower a day if I have no reason to take two. I work in healthcare, and the amount of people who don’t like to bathe ( usually white people) is insane. And yes we do smell them, their skin is flaking everywhere, and their intimate areas are 😳. I guess everyone is going to do what they feel is normal regardless if they are clean or not. I just don’t want to have to touch or sleep with said adults.