YO MAN I DONT WANT THAT SHT I GOT ENOUGH WITH MY OWN I feel like the university is sabotaging my focus so I cant leave the town. Devils, nymphs, tricksters and wizards throwing spikes in my path Even though I know I should keep to peace and compassion all I feel is wrath.
I am not sure how much of this is just me reading it a certain way or if you might be talking it up because.. well... internet. But if this is how you truly feel and this is your real waking life experience I urge you to seek professional assistance and get medicated or correct your medication to help get you back to zero so one day you might be able to try to come off meds again with a better head space leading in a better direction. Your situation is your responsibility, power to you :)
@@schizophrenic101-heretohel5 What is me even? Something is making 'me' this way, cause I 'am' pushing my boundaries mentally, seeing what I was not supposed to see. Its like this world is telling me to be grateful for the shit I am eating cause I could be drinking gasoline. Its always an 'or else' scenario when I start asking real questions. So now I am supposed to numb myself through the complexity of it, while no one holds my hand, so I can fit in to this big piece of shit. Meanwhile these mystical 'syncronicities' are becoming little insults at my adress, cause I need to comply 'or else'. I AM FILLED WITH HATRED, WHY ARE YOU DOING ME LIKE THIS!??!?!?! I WANT TO HELP, BUT WHEN I HELP ITS JUST WEIRD AND IF I DONT DO IT I GET THE HAMMER. Fuck a world that does not want to you to succeed on your terms, this makes a man want to kill. But yo man you are right I can just be sorta ignorant and live a lie then I am happy, why care?
@@LILEVERYTHINGG Not what I said at all. I suggested you get professional assistance, get correctly medicated to bring you some stability, so that then you may be able to more affectively help yourself and others and then maybe one day being able to handle being unmedicated. From what I can tell, you are not coping so well right now. Please take care of yourself, you are worth it.
@@schizophrenic101-heretohel5 Awhh, yeah my bad. I don't really want meds, I just want to be free of stress, cause otherwise I go loko. All of that is just university energy, bad vibes. I would cope well if I was not getting fucked by my thesis. But I can therapise myself by writting poetry and drawing, just don't make me a fool for not integrating in society - give me a path that does not involve selling my soul. Thank you for the kind words, you seem to be doing well. Good luck.
@@LILEVERYTHINGG not doing well but trying and that is all any of us can do. good luck to you too, and take advantage of the German health care system, I am missing it already.
There are always many paths to take and I don't know if locking onto any one direction is a good idea in this day and age, but I am on a better path than in my past and that is a good start.
@@schizophrenic101-heretohel5 Yeah, seems like entrepeneurship is the way forward nowadays, work on many projects at once, keep the mind flexible and flowing ;) .
YO MAN I DONT WANT THAT SHT I GOT ENOUGH WITH MY OWN
I feel like the university is sabotaging my focus so I cant leave the town.
Devils, nymphs, tricksters and wizards throwing spikes in my path
Even though I know I should keep to peace and compassion all I feel is wrath.
I am not sure how much of this is just me reading it a certain way or if you might be talking it up because.. well... internet. But if this is how you truly feel and this is your real waking life experience I urge you to seek professional assistance and get medicated or correct your medication to help get you back to zero so one day you might be able to try to come off meds again with a better head space leading in a better direction. Your situation is your responsibility, power to you :)
@@schizophrenic101-heretohel5 What is me even? Something is making 'me' this way, cause I 'am' pushing my boundaries mentally, seeing what I was not supposed to see. Its like this world is telling me to be grateful for the shit I am eating cause I could be drinking gasoline. Its always an 'or else' scenario when I start asking real questions. So now I am supposed to numb myself through the complexity of it, while no one holds my hand, so I can fit in to this big piece of shit. Meanwhile these mystical 'syncronicities' are becoming little insults at my adress, cause I need to comply 'or else'. I AM FILLED WITH HATRED, WHY ARE YOU DOING ME LIKE THIS!??!?!?! I WANT TO HELP, BUT WHEN I HELP ITS JUST WEIRD AND IF I DONT DO IT I GET THE HAMMER. Fuck a world that does not want to you to succeed on your terms, this makes a man want to kill. But yo man you are right I can just be sorta ignorant and live a lie then I am happy, why care?
@@LILEVERYTHINGG Not what I said at all.
I suggested you get professional assistance, get correctly medicated to bring you some stability, so that then you may be able to more affectively help yourself and others and then maybe one day being able to handle being unmedicated.
From what I can tell, you are not coping so well right now.
Please take care of yourself, you are worth it.
@@schizophrenic101-heretohel5 Awhh, yeah my bad. I don't really want meds, I just want to be free of stress, cause otherwise I go loko. All of that is just university energy, bad vibes. I would cope well if I was not getting fucked by my thesis.
But I can therapise myself by writting poetry and drawing, just don't make me a fool for not integrating in society - give me a path that does not involve selling my soul.
Thank you for the kind words, you seem to be doing well. Good luck.
@@LILEVERYTHINGG not doing well but trying and that is all any of us can do.
good luck to you too, and take advantage of the German health care system, I am missing it already.
Real talk sounds like the universe released you from some heavy responsibilities. Do you have a path to lock unto now?
There are always many paths to take and I don't know if locking onto any one direction is a good idea in this day and age, but I am on a better path than in my past and that is a good start.
@@schizophrenic101-heretohel5 Yeah, seems like entrepeneurship is the way forward nowadays, work on many projects at once, keep the mind flexible and flowing ;) .