That end message really helped me at the end. I have a lot of health issues that are too much on a first date and yeah I’m deff worried sometimes if I’ll meet someone who loves me back. But that ending note really helped my confidence. Much love Anthony - thank you for the inspiration.
Caaaan rellllaaaaaaattteeee. It's really hard to figure out what's just the right amount of info to convey when you have health issues. You'll find someone! You're worthy of love even if your body is failing you a bit.
Omg the demisexual thing that she talked about MADE SENSE TO ME! I don’t get physically attracted and I don’t like touching people! Thank you Anthony, now I know what to do!
I've identified as Demi for many years. Welcome to the ace community ☺️ Reading stuff online - particularly like AVEN - can help clarify any questions you may have ☺️ All the best with your self-discovery journey.
@theDespoiler Hi there. Demisexuality is a type of sexuality or sexual orientation. People who identify as demisexual only feel sexual attraction to another person if they form a strong emotional bond or connection with them first. Demisexuality is under the asexual umbrella. So people who identify as demisexual can basically have absolutely NO sex drive UNLESS a bond has been formed with a person. I can understand your confusion. On the surface it can sound normal, but imagine not having any crushes on anyone, not wanting to touch anyone or be touched, not wanting to diddle your fiddle, and seeing someone you can tell is conventionally attractive, but not feeling any way about it until you've been friends with them for a while.
@@alisinchainmail 100% thank you. Everything you said is 100%. I seriously hate how people like @theDespoiler dismiss asexual spectrum people as "normal" (i.e. allosexual). No. It's darn hard for asexual spectrum people in today's allosexual society. That person is so ignorant. They should educate themselves before commenting garbage and misinformed judgements and dismissing people's sexuality.
Every episode has so much value man, this is actually crazy. I really relate to the "oversharing" part, and this video helped me pointing it out. The ending really left me speechless and also excited about the future, almost like an epiphany. Like always, keep going Anthony, and thank you. The OG italian fan
I tend to "model" some aspects of my personality to get along with people anyway, probably because I'm scared of confrontation/I want to be liked by everybody. The ending helped realized/remember that, if I'm not being myself 100% of the times, I won't be able to find someone that likes me for who I really am, and that being with someone just for the sake of it or because I'm scared of being rejected it's tiring and almost disingenuous.
I really like how Alisin and Anthony addressed physical boundaries in dating scenarios right off the bat. Although I myself am not demisexual like Alisin is, I think that going at your own pace with anything physical is so so important for everyone to do in dating-especially girls. I say this because I know so many girls, myself included, who have been harmed by rape culture. And rape culture doesn’t just have to do with sex. It has to do with pushing anyone’s physical or emotional boundaries in any way when they have withdrawn their consent. For me, I am still learning how to fully respect other people’s consent in my late twenties, and it always begins by asking what their boundaries are (in friendships as well as in romantic relationships). Consent issues aside, I really relate to Alisin’s struggles as well as to her personality. This video has taught me more about myself than any other of Anthony’s videos. To end this on a happier note, I really dig both of the individuals on this date-both Alisin and Chet. Alisin shows so much vulnerability throughout this video, and Chet is, of course, a gem. Even if there is no connection there, it is very brave of both of them to try out something this scary and vulnerable. And in front of an audience of UA-camrs and UA-cames, no less
Awh you're sweet! I'm really glad you can relate and learned about yourself. Self discovery is the tits! Lol Chet really was a sweetheart and such a positive guy. I wish he got some more time to shine in this cuz he was super awesome IRL!!
Oh my god this is freaky! I’m freaking out and I’m at a loss for words cuz I totally did NOT expect you to reply! Alisin, I love you for engaging with me! Yeah for me, I only got enough of Chet to tantalize me. I would love to see more. Did you say he lives in LA? I live near San Diego...you never know...so I have a question for you, Alisin. Where can I find Chet’s podcast that he mentioned (Trash Mountain). I was looking for it online. Do you know any more about it than was mentioned in the video?
I am demisexual, and this is the first time I'm hearing/seeing Anthony acknowledge people on the asexual spectrum. That means a lot to us as the ace community. We're very misunderstood and judged harshly in society. It's not easy. The dating world today is so exclusive to allosexuals.
Yes! I love this! As an ace woman myself I’ve found dating in the past to be weird for similar concerns Alison had. Seeing Alison make that call beforehand really inspired me. That showed me that dating doesn’t have to be so awkward. I actually like the idea of calling before the date and setting expectations, I can see how that would definitely take off the pressure so both people can just come together to be themselves and enjoy the interaction. Talking about expectations, boundaries, and expressing your attraction (as I saw Eric Wen do in another video) is so refreshing to see. I think some might think that if you talk about those things that you’re being too direct and it’s unattractive to do, I see it now as a way to be considerate of the other person, keep the interaction in a place where both can have fun, and shows so much confidence to be so open about your attraction and what you need to feel safe and understood.
What a treasure series, glad I've Iooked into Anthony's first dates. Every person truly has some small automated self-sabotaging mechanisms just because they have never known any better. It's so helpful to observe these small patterns by others to better understand one's own behaviour. Alisen is so sweet ❤️ and her dog is a cutie too!
This just made me love you so much more. You make it feel safe to be vulnerable and awkward and real. I hope I can do that for other people too. I also appreciated this as someone with adhd who always used to feel like too much. I watch your videos because besides adhd, I grew up mostly outside society in a mini cult and I am still so aware of my imperfect social skills. What you do and the spirit of love and care you do it in is so refreshing and kind. Thank you
I love how anthony understands both sides of the gender expectations because she is demi sexual but guy who go on dates with her maybe don't know what that is so I love how anthony brings up communication we men are no mind-readers so we also have to guess when someone is not attracted to you by their body language so thank you anthony great video
It's so interesting how different the perspectives and interpretations are by the people on these dates you're setting up Anthony. Like one person will think it's "vibing so good" and the other will be like "nah, they're nice, but it wouldn't work for me". I'm learning a lot from these "youtube dates" 😁
Alright didn't watch your last "putting blabla on a date" because I was like that sounds boring but omgggg best series ever i just watched them all., please never stop making them :)))
@@AnthonyRecenello To be honest the presentation (title + thumbnail) just didn't really intruige me like I guess I thought it was just going to be setting up the date and it'd be boring. BUT it's actually SO interesting seeing somebody truely interacting (well at least the most true way considering theres a third person with a camera) on a first date and there insights after, as well as your perfect ways of redirecting them, and I think it's probably really helpful to basically all the viewers, so yeah keep it up im here for it!
@@AnthonyRecenello ALSO I personally think the titling could be better id say not putting but like following or something because from the first view it feels like your going to just brief them on what they should do on their upcoming date which is way less exiting than going along on the date with them. (I would've titled this video something along the lines of "coaching an onlyfan's girl through a first date")
To each there own, if someone can handle a cam girl or something with that realm of work, then great! But if you can’t, then great! There’s nothing wrong with one or the other, it’s just your preference.
She might be a Fearful Avoidant for attachment styles. I'd check out Thais Gibson. I'm very similar to Allison in the way she overshares upfront, feeling anxious, etc. Knowing my attachment style has helped me to start healing
I kinda love the angles you're using in this video, lad. I swear you're gonna blow up soon! I think its so interesting to see how you and Matthew Hussey are so different (I only mention him because he's one of the biggest relational coaches on youtube right now I think!). But I think I really love your style a lot more! You do more than just give little tips and tricks...you walk the journey with them, mate. Keep up the good work :)
Anthony you never disappoint! Another great video. I met someone really cool the other day and was thinking about your advice and guidance throughout our interaction and it really helped ! He asked for my number :)
I'm in the same boat as her. It takes me a long time to be attracted to someone and the feelings come in waaay down the road. I always see woman as friends first and somewhere down the road feelings pop in but I don't know when or if it'll happen
You know I'm on OG of your channel. I'm taking my precautions. But I've been dating. With one forthcoming this evening. We gotta live! Everyone, stay safe and love one another ✌.
Hey Anthony, don’t know if it’s your style but I would like to see you react to a UA-cam dating show in the uk called: ‘does the shoe fit’, If it’s not up your ally completely understand, liking the recent content my man 👍
Omg... she’s me. Like fully and whole-heartedly my exact personality. I struggle with that so much. I didn’t know about Demi-sexuality and made me research and think through about if that applies to me. This was a REALLY good one. I feel like a lot of the others were conventionally attractive people. Like she’s gorgeous and she’s doing HER thing with her look and what she does with her life. She does all of the things that aren’t in the center and that’s so amazing and inspiring. She and you, Anthony, will probably never see this. But I LOVED this video and idk how I didn’t see it before. I really loved it, she’s got a lot of I can tell similar fears, discomforts, triggers, and problems. This is amazing advice to see on how to deal with that. I place it on the table, because it weeds out the guys that it’s not a big deal between the boy that’s like “I’m not like that” because they’re hiding that they might be. This is now my absolute favorite by Anthony now. It really brought all of that to the front and made me think of how I want to present those things.
I really, really appreciate these videos Anthony. I feel like I'm learning so much and feeling so much better about myself. Much love to you and Allisin ❤️💖🍻
I love this series so much! So underrated and raw! Love your channel and way of communicating and connecting with others ☺️💕 would love to see more of these videos, so boo pandemic
Oh my God! I really am an oversharer when it comes to some things in my life and I scare the person away! :( Its such a down side of mine. Its like I really like someone, Im scared they wont like me back and I push them away by oversharing, because I wanna see will someone accept me for who I am ( Im anxious alot and always think that would be such a problem for someone), because my ex was such an asshole to me
wow, she really trust you to open with you that much, glad she can trust i hope she finds a significant other, i feel that i have way to much theory about dating, but i don't have dates, i never really get pass the messaging phase.
I don’t think it’s trust.. I think it’s being so numbed to rejection that you just want to get all the deal breakers out of the way so you don’t have to waste so much time + emotional energy. I know that this is at least the reason why I have such an urge to overshare.
Never heard of the enneagram before! I think I'm a 7 THE ENTHUSIAST - The Busy, Fun-Loving Type: Spontaneous, Versatile, Distractible, and Scattered. I find with most personality tests, the ADHD really hijacks the test. lol
Hey bro! just a heads up, that guys phone number is on the screen at around 2:45 you can blur it in youtube to edit it out, you don't have to reupload the video or anything. Just thought I'd let you know!
Btw I find your content pretty interesting, been a subscriber for a while, and I understand you are trying to help these people date and stuff, but I definitely think some people need to go through therapy instead of learning these tricks that you tell them on how to get a second date with someone. They need to get their lives in order and be in a good place before pursuing relationships. If I was on a second date with someone and they started telling me all this crazy stuff that they left out on the first date I would maybe be a little upset that they mislead me into that second date. I think it's important to let your "freak flag fly" like she did so the other party knows what they are getting into from the jump. I'm by no means a dating expert, just my 2 cents.
13:35 I talked to a woman who was just like that and explained it like she did. The woman was very open and wanted to air everything out to let ppl know what they were getting into. Being open is totally fine and actually a good thing it's just it was a lot lol. We did end up hanging out. It didn't work out but it was still nice.
I am demisexual slightly myself. I am not having touch problems when they touch me but i personally don't touch at all and i don't feel sexual for someone instantly like others do. I need to properly know someone before i get to the sexual level and this has created for myself numerous "friendzone" situations. I absolutely hate it because i also live in a country where instant attraction and touch are pretty much expected otherwise it's interpreted as you not being interested.
I see that too. I'm not a demisexual myself. And though I've never been on a date, I don't think I could do the whole unwritten rules and all of that [that I'm supposed to know about]. Like 3 dates meaning sex. To me, that is way too soon to do something as scary and risky as kissing someone, let alone having sex with them. I would need much more time to get to know the person, develop closeness and trust, etc. Not necessarily because I'm not attracted to them, but because it's way too early to do something so vulnerable and risky with someone.
Hey Anthony, so I haven’t dated since being diagnosed with my chronic illness. How would I approach this in a dating dynamic - it doesn’t feel like first date material?
Just finished! So Allison is pretty normal, in the sense that there are a LOT of girls like her. She's damaged. And the collateral damage from that is rejection. She puts up so many walls. That in a sense; she purposely makes herself undesirable in order to speed up the process. She doesn't like getting on with a guy well and then having the rug pulled from under her. Since she's so damaged; she over-thinks which element of her baggage causes her misfortunes. It's a painful place to be in. She doesn't have a healthy sexual outlet through a relationship. But she's a young woman that has desires. She doesn't know how to connect to her sexuality. But she knows it's there. So she detaches herself from it and expresses it on OF. I've dated women like her. And in fact; my Wednesday date did almost exactly what she did! We met on an app. Early 20's. Smart. Beautiful. Within the first 30mins; I knew all about her recent divorce and the foreigner that essentially screwed her over. That unfortunately killed it for me. Not due to her. But I wondered if she was even in a space to be in a healthy relationship. I hope Allison gets therapy. She's got personality. And she would do serious damage in life of she could tackle her issues once and for all. Good luck Allie 🙏💪
I realize you probably don't intend to be negative or rude with this comment, but please keep in mind that you're talking about a woman, a human being. Humans don't get damaged, they're not objects, they get hurt. The idea that people get damaged and then fixed it's really harmfull, as it perpetuates the idea that you have a state of 'untouched' and if you're somewhat hurt you loose value. People are not things and their value and capability of hapiness is present always. To talk about someone as a 'damaged' person implies that she will need to be 'fixed' when people are constantly healing from what hurts them and their value does't diminish for it. Please, just mind those words a little more. I hope my message was clear (english is not my first language) and that you have a nice day.
@@antonellacallegaro5143 I appreciate your perspectibe. But it appears the message was well - received. I spoke my opinion in my words. And I'm sending her nothing but love.
@@alisinchainmail It's a life changer! Doesn't fix things over night. But just being open to it is big enough. The dropout rate is astronomical. So I salute you and anyone else for staying diligent 🙏
Didn't really know what demisexual was and a comment below helped me to connect it with "I don't like touching people". I don't know that I am demisexual but definitely funny about touching people. Like shaking hands is weird to me. Man I think I been friend zoned a lot because of this. Your advise about "setting the pace" before hand sounds like a good technique to remedy this.
Hi! So this could be touch sensitivity or a sensory processing disorder. I might be touch sensitive because of my ADHD and I think my demisexuality and previous traumas might add to that discomfort. Touch sensitivity can be linked to anxiety disorders, autism, adhd, ptsd, etc...or it could just be how you operate. It's fairly common, so know you're not alone 🖤
@@alisinchainmail I have anxious attachment so def not judging. I recommend checking out the book Attached, it has helped me understand why I struggle w intimacy and relationships so much
@@mishvo i find that i've been wanting a more relaxed self-secure partner. I've been curious with polygamy and open relationships. I don't think I want a super glue attachment to another person again. I can only focus on so much at once so in order to juggle a relationship and all of my hobbies and endeavors, i think i'd be ok with being one of multiple relationships so the pressure isn't all on me. I'm incredibly independent and haven't had relationships for most of my dating years, even from the get go. (Demisexuality thing- i just can't be bothered.) That's why i hesitate to think your theory is completely valid in my case. I can be a ride or die when serious feels come into place but i have yet to discover how often that can occur. I suspect that comes with the ADHD hyperfocus or chemical release of love rather than an insecure attachment.
@@alisinchainmail ahh okay I see. This sounds more avoidant then. Or who knows I could be totally off and you’re securely attached! I tried the open relationship thing...both partners have to be VERY securely attached (plus communicative and transparent as hell) for it to work.
@@choco1199 thank you so much for the first advice! And sure but you can you share your IG and I’ll dm you cause lol I don’t feel comfortable sharing mine online lol
Also, I have the perfect recommendation for the show! Kalel is a UA-camr in the LA area, I believe. I'm pretty sure she's single and would be open to this type of thing. She used to go by the name KalelKitten, but now, it's just Kalel. This is the link to her channel: ua-cam.com/users/WatchUsLiveAndStuff
Had to pause around the 7 minute mark because I got exhausted by her fussing with the dog lol I imagine that would be a constant thing on a date with her that her attention is on a thousand things at once, seems hard to keep up with. For me at least. They're both cool people and even if nothing romantic comes of it I think it was definitely a cool experience for both of them
I wish she would have been able to pick up on his tone of voice & body language. I feel as soon as she mentioned the family issues he shut her out of his mind as a possibility. When she asks “how do you feel about us being on a first date?” It seemed too heavy & specific of a question.. & I feel he probably assumed that she was already trying to push them into a relationship since it did sound like this was what she was hinting at. It definitely seemed that she may come off as “too needy”, which I can understand having been on the guy’s side of things before. It’s a common block to dating if the individual seems too interested too early on. Working on recognizing tone & body language would certainly help her in life as well as relationships. I have experience with oversharing as well but it is important to accept that this behavior is only self harming.. just like drinking or other physically/emotionally harmful behaviors. It can be addictive just like a drug.
I am the opposite when it comes to unknown expectations. If I don't know. I assume the worst and think they are not interested at all. unfortunately it's a self fulfilling prophecy.
That end message really helped me at the end. I have a lot of health issues that are too much on a first date and yeah I’m deff worried sometimes if I’ll meet someone who loves me back. But that ending note really helped my confidence. Much love Anthony - thank you for the inspiration.
Caaaan rellllaaaaaaattteeee. It's really hard to figure out what's just the right amount of info to convey when you have health issues. You'll find someone! You're worthy of love even if your body is failing you a bit.
Yes, 28 single mom of 3 young kids. And 5 different severe health issues with no cure. 😑😩 No dating here
@doll i have a feeding tube too! but yes that would be a dope episode
Let's give Alisin some love in the comments. She put her full self into this experience without hiding one thing. Commendable. 🙏🏻
Way to go Alison!
I spelled her name wrong 🤦. But more love to this strong woman!
She is super brave! What a cool lady!
Awwhhhhh geee thanks, buddy!! ❤🖤❤🖤
Omg the demisexual thing that she talked about MADE SENSE TO ME! I don’t get physically attracted and I don’t like touching people! Thank you Anthony, now I know what to do!
🙏🏻
Dude it's so confusing to figure out. It's like not asexual, but almost.
I've identified as Demi for many years. Welcome to the ace community ☺️ Reading stuff online - particularly like AVEN - can help clarify any questions you may have ☺️ All the best with your self-discovery journey.
@theDespoiler Hi there. Demisexuality is a type of sexuality or sexual orientation. People who identify as demisexual only feel sexual attraction to another person if they form a strong emotional bond or connection with them first.
Demisexuality is under the asexual umbrella. So people who identify as demisexual can basically have absolutely NO sex drive UNLESS a bond has been formed with a person.
I can understand your confusion. On the surface it can sound normal, but imagine not having any crushes on anyone, not wanting to touch anyone or be touched, not wanting to diddle your fiddle, and seeing someone you can tell is conventionally attractive, but not feeling any way about it until you've been friends with them for a while.
@@alisinchainmail 100% thank you. Everything you said is 100%. I seriously hate how people like @theDespoiler dismiss asexual spectrum people as "normal" (i.e. allosexual). No. It's darn hard for asexual spectrum people in today's allosexual society. That person is so ignorant. They should educate themselves before commenting garbage and misinformed judgements and dismissing people's sexuality.
Such a good - You’re superhuman man at connecting with and humanizing everyone in super unexpected ways
This is some real stuff!!!!
Every episode has so much value man, this is actually crazy. I really relate to the "oversharing" part, and this video helped me pointing it out. The ending really left me speechless and also excited about the future, almost like an epiphany. Like always, keep going Anthony, and thank you.
The OG italian fan
What was the epiphany?
I tend to "model" some aspects of my personality to get along with people anyway, probably because I'm scared of confrontation/I want to be liked by everybody. The ending helped realized/remember that, if I'm not being myself 100% of the times, I won't be able to find someone that likes me for who I really am, and that being with someone just for the sake of it or because I'm scared of being rejected it's tiring and almost disingenuous.
She seems like such a sweet girl! I love this series!
Dude, your stuff is so refreshing, thanks for making 2020 suck a little less
Big compliment
@@AnthonyRecenello Big reply
Am i the only one who likes chet like that man is the definition of wholesome
I really like how Alisin and Anthony addressed physical boundaries in dating scenarios right off the bat. Although I myself am not demisexual like Alisin is, I think that going at your own pace with anything physical is so so important for everyone to do in dating-especially girls. I say this because I know so many girls, myself included, who have been harmed by rape culture. And rape culture doesn’t just have to do with sex. It has to do with pushing anyone’s physical or emotional boundaries in any way when they have withdrawn their consent. For me, I am still learning how to fully respect other people’s consent in my late twenties, and it always begins by asking what their boundaries are (in friendships as well as in romantic relationships).
Consent issues aside, I really relate to Alisin’s struggles as well as to her personality. This video has taught me more about myself than any other of Anthony’s videos.
To end this on a happier note, I really dig both of the individuals on this date-both Alisin and Chet. Alisin shows so much vulnerability throughout this video, and Chet is, of course, a gem. Even if there is no connection there, it is very brave of both of them to try out something this scary and vulnerable. And in front of an audience of UA-camrs and UA-cames, no less
Awh you're sweet! I'm really glad you can relate and learned about yourself. Self discovery is the tits! Lol Chet really was a sweetheart and such a positive guy. I wish he got some more time to shine in this cuz he was super awesome IRL!!
Oh my god this is freaky! I’m freaking out and I’m at a loss for words cuz I totally did NOT expect you to reply! Alisin, I love you for engaging with me! Yeah for me, I only got enough of Chet to tantalize me. I would love to see more. Did you say he lives in LA? I live near San Diego...you never know...so I have a question for you, Alisin. Where can I find Chet’s podcast that he mentioned (Trash Mountain). I was looking for it online. Do you know any more about it than was mentioned in the video?
@@mariescott8053 lol no we didn't even exchange numbers after our date haha
That’s ok. Chet said he had “unplugged” from the internet a while ago
@Beats Beats the irony.
Anthony, you should do the follow-up on these vids when the date goes well
Omg, yes!
I am demisexual, and this is the first time I'm hearing/seeing Anthony acknowledge people on the asexual spectrum. That means a lot to us as the ace community. We're very misunderstood and judged harshly in society. It's not easy. The dating world today is so exclusive to allosexuals.
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Yes! I love this! As an ace woman myself I’ve found dating in the past to be weird for similar concerns Alison had. Seeing Alison make that call beforehand really inspired me. That showed me that dating doesn’t have to be so awkward. I actually like the idea of calling before the date and setting expectations, I can see how that would definitely take off the pressure so both people can just come together to be themselves and enjoy the interaction.
Talking about expectations, boundaries, and expressing your attraction (as I saw Eric Wen do in another video) is so refreshing to see. I think some might think that if you talk about those things that you’re being too direct and it’s unattractive to do, I see it now as a way to be considerate of the other person, keep the interaction in a place where both can have fun, and shows so much confidence to be so open about your attraction and what you need to feel safe and understood.
@@johannaguerrero1790 🙏🏻
I love how you actually SHOW in practice how to just be your best self. This is the most helpful relationship advice I saw.
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What a treasure series, glad I've Iooked into Anthony's first dates. Every person truly has some small automated self-sabotaging mechanisms just because they have never known any better. It's so helpful to observe these small patterns by others to better understand one's own behaviour. Alisen is so sweet ❤️ and her dog is a cutie too!
This just made me love you so much more. You make it feel safe to be vulnerable and awkward and real. I hope I can do that for other people too. I also appreciated this as someone with adhd who always used to feel like too much. I watch your videos because besides adhd, I grew up mostly outside society in a mini cult and I am still so aware of my imperfect social skills. What you do and the spirit of love and care you do it in is so refreshing and kind. Thank you
I love how anthony understands both sides of the gender expectations because she is demi sexual but guy who go on dates with her maybe don't know what that is so I love how anthony brings up communication we men are no mind-readers so we also have to guess when someone is not attracted to you by their body language so thank you anthony great video
That’s Anthony’s main value offering
Alisin is so brave doing this! I really admire her confidence:)
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🖤🖤🖤🖤
It's so interesting how different the perspectives and interpretations are by the people on these dates you're setting up Anthony. Like one person will think it's "vibing so good" and the other will be like "nah, they're nice, but it wouldn't work for me". I'm learning a lot from these "youtube dates" 😁
Love the humanization of this video!
I’m glad u thought so
@@AnthonyRecenello OH SHIT YOU RESPONDED THAT'S COOL.
Alright didn't watch your last "putting blabla on a date" because I was like that sounds boring but omgggg best series ever i just watched them all., please never stop making them :)))
This show needs to be viral!
i knew ud come around
@@AnthonyRecenello To be honest the presentation (title + thumbnail) just didn't really intruige me like I guess I thought it was just going to be setting up the date and it'd be boring. BUT it's actually SO interesting seeing somebody truely interacting (well at least the most true way considering theres a third person with a camera) on a first date and there insights after, as well as your perfect ways of redirecting them, and I think it's probably really helpful to basically all the viewers, so yeah keep it up im here for it!
@@AnthonyRecenello ALSO I personally think the titling could be better id say not putting but like following or something because from the first view it feels like your going to just brief them on what they should do on their upcoming date which is way less exiting than going along on the date with them. (I would've titled this video something along the lines of "coaching an onlyfan's girl through a first date")
@@gedpictures2487 im taking your great advice
To each there own, if someone can handle a cam girl or something with that realm of work, then great! But if you can’t, then great! There’s nothing wrong with one or the other, it’s just your preference.
Lol yeah! Some people can't handle dating accountants either lololol
I've been on so many first dates and done so much work on me to find a partner but haven't been successful as yet. This was super eye-opening!!
I'm really rooting for you to get a prime time TV show. You are worthy!
She might be a Fearful Avoidant for attachment styles. I'd check out Thais Gibson. I'm very similar to Allison in the way she overshares upfront, feeling anxious, etc. Knowing my attachment style has helped me to start healing
I kinda love the angles you're using in this video, lad. I swear you're gonna blow up soon! I think its so interesting to see how you and Matthew Hussey are so different (I only mention him because he's one of the biggest relational coaches on youtube right now I think!). But I think I really love your style a lot more! You do more than just give little tips and tricks...you walk the journey with them, mate. Keep up the good work :)
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I got nervous for her when Anthony said “do you know what I’m thinking about right now?” Lol I hate phone calls😅
Love this series😊👊🏾
OMG SAAAMMMME Phone calls make me so nervous!!
I am from Kelly Stamps to here, love your videos too
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Anthony you never disappoint! Another great video. I met someone really cool the other day and was thinking about your advice and guidance throughout our interaction and it really helped ! He asked for my number :)
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I'm in the same boat as her. It takes me a long time to be attracted to someone and the feelings come in waaay down the road. I always see woman as friends first and somewhere down the road feelings pop in but I don't know when or if it'll happen
Great video, made a bunch of notes.
I needed this video! I tend to overshare, and the part about what you share on a first date (lifestyle stuff) is super useful!
You know I'm on OG of your channel. I'm taking my precautions. But I've been dating. With one forthcoming this evening.
We gotta live! Everyone, stay safe and love one another ✌.
🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻
Hey Anthony, don’t know if it’s your style but I would like to see you react to a UA-cam dating show in the uk called: ‘does the shoe fit’, If it’s not up your ally completely understand, liking the recent content my man 👍
The horror like background music before she called the guy is how I feel before making any call lol
Really cool video tho she is funny
Also Idk who edited this but they did a good job:))
Me goddamit. ME!
Omg... she’s me. Like fully and whole-heartedly my exact personality. I struggle with that so much. I didn’t know about Demi-sexuality and made me research and think through about if that applies to me. This was a REALLY good one. I feel like a lot of the others were conventionally attractive people. Like she’s gorgeous and she’s doing HER thing with her look and what she does with her life. She does all of the things that aren’t in the center and that’s so amazing and inspiring. She and you, Anthony, will probably never see this. But I LOVED this video and idk how I didn’t see it before. I really loved it, she’s got a lot of I can tell similar fears, discomforts, triggers, and problems. This is amazing advice to see on how to deal with that. I place it on the table, because it weeds out the guys that it’s not a big deal between the boy that’s like “I’m not like that” because they’re hiding that they might be. This is now my absolute favorite by Anthony now. It really brought all of that to the front and made me think of how I want to present those things.
So glad you connected with it Alicia
I wish I had seen this years ago. Would have saved me so many heart breaks. Thanks for teaches us this ❤
She might have spooked him with oversharing personal problems, but the camgirl thing definitely sealed the deal.
Awwww I love her when she's expressing on how her past has hurt her cuz I can relate !!!!! Your amazing girl❤️🙌🏼
I really, really appreciate these videos Anthony. I feel like I'm learning so much and feeling so much better about myself. Much love to you and Allisin ❤️💖🍻
"Demisexual"...good to know. I live in the Midwest lol....never heard that phrase.
hey me to!
@@abigailgray yay for the corn fields!
Demisexual basically means ur not sexually attracted to someone unless you have an emotional connection.
@@slinkid9410 which makes some good sense to me :D
@@oliviatrue2907 It’s also under the asexual umbrella ☺️💕
Here from Chris Chann. You were really genuine and get the sub man.
Yes! The part about being enough is so so so important :)))
I love this series so much! So underrated and raw! Love your channel and way of communicating and connecting with others ☺️💕 would love to see more of these videos, so boo pandemic
You KNOW I appreciated this one. 💗🙏🏻✨🌷
🙏🏻
Oh my God! I really am an oversharer when it comes to some things in my life and I scare the person away! :(
Its such a down side of mine. Its like I really like someone, Im scared they wont like me back and I push them away by oversharing, because I wanna see will someone accept me for who I am ( Im anxious alot and always think that would be such a problem for someone), because my ex was such an asshole to me
:-)
You'll find the right person, Mr Bean! I believe in you
@@Zedd550 lool , im a woman btw
wow, she really trust you to open with you that much, glad she can trust i hope she finds a significant other, i feel that i have way to much theory about dating, but i don't have dates, i never really get pass the messaging phase.
I don’t think it’s trust.. I think it’s being so numbed to rejection that you just want to get all the deal breakers out of the way so you don’t have to waste so much time + emotional energy. I know that this is at least the reason why I have such an urge to overshare.
Uuh I feel you girl! 💜 (Ps: do you know the enneagram? Because I have a feeling you could be a personality 4 too)che
Never heard of the enneagram before! I think I'm a 7 THE ENTHUSIAST - The Busy, Fun-Loving Type: Spontaneous, Versatile, Distractible, and Scattered. I find with most personality tests, the ADHD really hijacks the test. lol
Hey bro! just a heads up, that guys phone number is on the screen at around 2:45 you can blur it in youtube to edit it out, you don't have to reupload the video or anything. Just thought I'd let you know!
Just thought id let all comment readers know that lool
This comment needs more likes
I dont have ADD but i will ramble about anything if im anxious i will just keep talking or being hectic just like she did so thank u!!
These videos are so helpful, thank you!!! Would love to see more!
Loving these videos thank you Anthony♥️♥️♥️
Btw I find your content pretty interesting, been a subscriber for a while, and I understand you are trying to help these people date and stuff, but I definitely think some people need to go through therapy instead of learning these tricks that you tell them on how to get a second date with someone. They need to get their lives in order and be in a good place before pursuing relationships. If I was on a second date with someone and they started telling me all this crazy stuff that they left out on the first date I would maybe be a little upset that they mislead me into that second date. I think it's important to let your "freak flag fly" like she did so the other party knows what they are getting into from the jump. I'm by no means a dating expert, just my 2 cents.
omg keep doing it, I'm loving it and learning so much!
I love your advice, I always keep it at the back of my head!!❤️
13:35 I talked to a woman who was just like that and explained it like she did. The woman was very open and wanted to air everything out to let ppl know what they were getting into. Being open is totally fine and actually a good thing it's just it was a lot lol. We did end up hanging out. It didn't work out but it was still nice.
Solid advice from the dating coach
The end really opened my eyes thanks for the help
I Always learn something new!!! Thank you!
I was wondering where you're finding these guys from and how do you pick out 3 guys for each episode?
In the description it says how to apply to be on the show
I love this series so much
This makes me feel like I could work on myself too because if I was in Chet's position I would not be with it at all
He fully addressed it at the end. The divulging really got me
How do you think you would react?
These videos are amazing. Keep it up Anthony!
really like this video and the idea behind it!
Great job man keep up the good work
"A wizard that owns a dive bar" 🤣😂🤣🙏🤣 Best movie ever! 🤣
I want more of theseee
It's amazing. She's so different than what I'm used to see
🙏🏻
Ali is cool as shit. I got a chance to hang out with her at vidcon 2019. Such a character.
Love this !!
I wish I had Anthony as my guardian angel on my first dates :) It would make things so much easier lol
I am demisexual slightly myself. I am not having touch problems when they touch me but i personally don't touch at all and i don't feel sexual for someone instantly like others do. I need to properly know someone before i get to the sexual level and this has created for myself numerous "friendzone" situations. I absolutely hate it because i also live in a country where instant attraction and touch are pretty much expected otherwise it's interpreted as you not being interested.
Man dude. I don't love myself. I really don't. I'm crying.
🙏🏻
Demisexual here as well. Thanks for including us because it feels like we are aliens in this hook up culture society.
🖤👽🖤
Question here: how being demisexul tempered with also being a cam girl. Is it an alter ego
I see that too. I'm not a demisexual myself. And though I've never been on a date, I don't think I could do the whole unwritten rules and all of that [that I'm supposed to know about]. Like 3 dates meaning sex. To me, that is way too soon to do something as scary and risky as kissing someone, let alone having sex with them. I would need much more time to get to know the person, develop closeness and trust, etc. Not necessarily because I'm not attracted to them, but because it's way too early to do something so vulnerable and risky with someone.
LOVE U ALISIN
🖤
Could you do a video on Holland Roden and Dylan O’Brien? ✨
Hey Anthony, so I haven’t dated since being diagnosed with my chronic illness. How would I approach this in a dating dynamic - it doesn’t feel like first date material?
I’d love to do this!!!
I think it’s funny I’m watching this. I’m so not looking for a relationship lol. Great tips though thanks!
Just finished! So Allison is pretty normal, in the sense that there are a LOT of girls like her. She's damaged. And the collateral damage from that is rejection. She puts up so many walls. That in a sense; she purposely makes herself undesirable in order to speed up the process.
She doesn't like getting on with a guy well and then having the rug pulled from under her. Since she's so damaged; she over-thinks which element of her baggage causes her misfortunes. It's a painful place to be in.
She doesn't have a healthy sexual outlet through a relationship. But she's a young woman that has desires. She doesn't know how to connect to her sexuality. But she knows it's there. So she detaches herself from it and expresses it on OF.
I've dated women like her. And in fact; my Wednesday date did almost exactly what she did! We met on an app. Early 20's. Smart. Beautiful. Within the first 30mins; I knew all about her recent divorce and the foreigner that essentially screwed her over.
That unfortunately killed it for me. Not due to her. But I wondered if she was even in a space to be in a healthy relationship.
I hope Allison gets therapy. She's got personality. And she would do serious damage in life of she could tackle her issues once and for all. Good luck Allie 🙏💪
I realize you probably don't intend to be negative or rude with this comment, but please keep in mind that you're talking about a woman, a human being. Humans don't get damaged, they're not objects, they get hurt. The idea that people get damaged and then fixed it's really harmfull, as it perpetuates the idea that you have a state of 'untouched' and if you're somewhat hurt you loose value. People are not things and their value and capability of hapiness is present always. To talk about someone as a 'damaged' person implies that she will need to be 'fixed' when people are constantly healing from what hurts them and their value does't diminish for it.
Please, just mind those words a little more. I hope my message was clear (english is not my first language) and that you have a nice day.
@@antonellacallegaro5143 I appreciate your perspectibe. But it appears the message was well - received. I spoke my opinion in my words. And I'm sending her nothing but love.
@@antonellacallegaro5143 Thank you for saying this.
I am in therapy, my dude. Highly recommend.
@@alisinchainmail It's a life changer! Doesn't fix things over night. But just being open to it is big enough. The dropout rate is astronomical. So I salute you and anyone else for staying diligent 🙏
Soooooo when are you gonna have your own netflix show?
Her : "Oooh, this is also like Dead by Daylight"
Me: *Connection established*
Didn't really know what demisexual was and a comment below helped me to connect it with "I don't like touching people". I don't know that I am demisexual but definitely funny about touching people. Like shaking hands is weird to me. Man I think I been friend zoned a lot because of this. Your advise about "setting the pace" before hand sounds like a good technique to remedy this.
Hi! So this could be touch sensitivity or a sensory processing disorder. I might be touch sensitive because of my ADHD and I think my demisexuality and previous traumas might add to that discomfort. Touch sensitivity can be linked to anxiety disorders, autism, adhd, ptsd, etc...or it could just be how you operate. It's fairly common, so know you're not alone 🖤
@@alisinchainmail Yes. Probably related to my ADHD.
This man is a genius
WHO?!
Anthonyyyy this comes back to insecure attachment (shes probably anxiously attached to romantic partners)
🤷♀️ i guess only time will tell
@@alisinchainmail I have anxious attachment so def not judging. I recommend checking out the book Attached, it has helped me understand why I struggle w intimacy and relationships so much
@@mishvo i find that i've been wanting a more relaxed self-secure partner. I've been curious with polygamy and open relationships. I don't think I want a super glue attachment to another person again. I can only focus on so much at once so in order to juggle a relationship and all of my hobbies and endeavors, i think i'd be ok with being one of multiple relationships so the pressure isn't all on me. I'm incredibly independent and haven't had relationships for most of my dating years, even from the get go. (Demisexuality thing- i just can't be bothered.) That's why i hesitate to think your theory is completely valid in my case. I can be a ride or die when serious feels come into place but i have yet to discover how often that can occur. I suspect that comes with the ADHD hyperfocus or chemical release of love rather than an insecure attachment.
@@mishvo i do appreciate the book suggestion though! My ADHD makes me haaaate reading. 😭 It's too much of a battle if it's not smaller increments.
@@alisinchainmail ahh okay I see. This sounds more avoidant then. Or who knows I could be totally off and you’re securely attached! I tried the open relationship thing...both partners have to be VERY securely attached (plus communicative and transparent as hell) for it to work.
How do you know what type of guy suits your personality or if i have a type? Cause man I don’t have a type and my dating life is all over the place 😩
Just try finding guys you really like. You can also try learning about Personality Compatibility like MBTI
I could msg u some tips if u tell me ur instagram
@@choco1199 thank you so much for the first advice! And sure but you can you share your IG and I’ll dm you cause lol I don’t feel comfortable sharing mine online lol
I try to use eye contact but I legit go crosseyed n get anxiety
Please react to COURTMIEN (Courtney and Damien from Smosh
good video anthony
Hahhaha, thanks for giving me content Anthony!
😘
Also, I have the perfect recommendation for the show! Kalel is a UA-camr in the LA area, I believe. I'm pretty sure she's single and would be open to this type of thing. She used to go by the name KalelKitten, but now, it's just Kalel. This is the link to her channel: ua-cam.com/users/WatchUsLiveAndStuff
Go tell her!
She is a sweet good -hearted person, but I feel that she needs help(professional).
Well Done Anthony, can you coach a man next time ? Loving this new serie and I don't know why it's not getting more attention.
man coming next
Had to pause around the 7 minute mark because I got exhausted by her fussing with the dog lol I imagine that would be a constant thing on a date with her that her attention is on a thousand things at once, seems hard to keep up with. For me at least. They're both cool people and even if nothing romantic comes of it I think it was definitely a cool experience for both of them
🙏🏻
How many times did she say ADHD?
Lolololol enough times for it to make the cut so anyone watching would know I have it...if they couldn't tell already
I wish she would have been able to pick up on his tone of voice & body language. I feel as soon as she mentioned the family issues he shut her out of his mind as a possibility. When she asks “how do you feel about us being on a first date?” It seemed too heavy & specific of a question.. & I feel he probably assumed that she was already trying to push them into a relationship since it did sound like this was what she was hinting at. It definitely seemed that she may come off as “too needy”, which I can understand having been on the guy’s side of things before. It’s a common block to dating if the individual seems too interested too early on. Working on recognizing tone & body language would certainly help her in life as well as relationships. I have experience with oversharing as well but it is important to accept that this behavior is only self harming.. just like drinking or other physically/emotionally harmful behaviors. It can be addictive just like a drug.
I would love to see his take on Taekook with their secret eye and hand signal communication.
You should check out AustinTV’s love or host show 😆
I am the opposite when it comes to unknown expectations.
If I don't know. I assume the worst and think they are not interested at all.
unfortunately it's a self fulfilling prophecy.
Hey Anthony--- can you please check out CantoMando and maybe help Sheldon out because his dates are really hard to watch? :)
You gotta go DM them and comment on their vids. It’s super hard for us to get in contact w influencers!
Yeah its cuz of the pandemic ha ha definetly (bursts out crying)
07:04 did she rly said Dead by Daylight ? xD i Love that game, as KILLER and survivior :P
Yup she loves that game
@@AnthonyRecenello chances are low buuut, can we play together ? i mean like alisan and i. :) i feel her.. small backpacks is a luxury right ? ^^'
@@AcVinicious contact her!