A Personal Journey (Euro Truck Simulator 2)
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- Опубліковано 27 вер 2024
- Taking a drive and chatting about why there have been no videos over the last couple of months.
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I am genuinely blown away by the concern, understanding and best wishes expressed in the comments that I have read (and I've read hundreds of them).
Thank you
Squirrel you don't need to thank us Paul we're all here for you
YOU'RE THE BEST SQUIRREL! "The nut house is the classiest community on the internet" - Squirrel 2014
God bless you, Paul. You have my condolences.
God bless you and your family R.I.P. to your mom
We are here for you paul. If you ever need to talk to someone just tell one of us.
Don't ever be sorry for being human my friend. We will be here for you. whatever comes. Glad the time helped. I'm losing my mom to demensia right now. I know the punch is coming. But I also know it's going to destroy me. But life will go on. Courage and love to you.
Marc Dupont What you wrote is Very Nice and kind of you
Such a nice intro, I hope you can carry on making videos. That being said, take all the time you need let’s make yots4 the best ever
EDIT: thanks for all the likes. And the heart
Shaun Huggins I second my good friend here, take as much time as you need to grieve man 👍
Well said 😁
Addy 12156 thanks
I agree. Take as much time as you need. Here's to yots4
Jack Emsley of course
Thank you, thank you for making me learn to cherish my parents more now. Thank you❤️. God bless you , cheers
You need a video for that ? , shame.. SHAME !
Squirrel.
You may see this comment, you may not (I really hope you do). I've been following you for years. Years and years. FSX, Car Mechanic Simulator, Spin Tires, ETS2, My Summer Car, and the like. Not once have you disappointed. I used to come home from secondary school, waiting for the "Squirrel has uploaded a video" notification on my phone, or my emails. I do the same even now - I'm an IP lawyer in training, and I still come home some evenings and wait for those notifications. I came home this evening, saw this notification and was so excited. I knew what had happened from your post on your social page here on YT - so I understood totally the absolute pain you were going through, though I have yet to experience it myself. At 21:05, you then apologise for your absence.
That got me. That got me that you felt you had to apologise, because trust me, you have nothing to apologise for. I'm damn sure that your other many subscribers will agree with me when I say that you could take all the time you need and want, because we have your back. We will wait for you to be ready to come back.
Paul, I wish you all the best. It's hard, but the hardest bit has passed, so rest in the knowledge that things can only get easier for you, that your mum is at peace. Think of yourself for a change, and don't worry about us. We'll be here. :)
All the best for 2018.
James G :)
Dribbly Midget - sorry to hook on to your post .... but I was feeling the exact same way as you.
Can't describe it better...
Yakumo Fujji Feel free :)
You said That really well, I feel the same. :]
You cannot have said it any better,
Well said!
Hi Paul i am not one of the most prolific posters either on here or twitch but i just wanted to say i am really sorry for your loss, being part of your community is something really special and i consider myself lucky to be part of it.Completely understand you taking time out, welcome back my friend and happy trucking.
Dkentflyer jhgffggghhhfhjfffjfjfjfjdjfjfjfjfjfndndndndjejdndndndnnddnnddnndndndndndndndndndndndndnnddnnnenenenenenenneennenenenenennenenenenenenenenenennenenenenenenenenenenennenenenenenn I n
You nearly made me cry
Because my grandad had vascular dementia form cigars when he was younger and he also died in his sleep in hospital very peacefully after all my family had said goodbye but we weren’t expecting it to go so soon so I kind of know where your coming from my grandad died on the 21st of December 2015 and still to this day I talk to him before I fall asleep and he is my stress reliever you should always talk to her because if she is there in your heart then she will be with your forever
I’ve decided to put this in a different comment coz it doesn’t fit the original one but I live in England and right now it’s -1 degrees Celsius which is freezing for me
Lewis Newell here is -29 degrees :(
kukkahattu täti where?
Alessandro Moretti In Finland at the morning when I ride to school by bike
kukkahattu täti oh wow
Hi Paul, I want to commend you for making this video. It's something you didn't really need to do...but it just shows the passion you have for your work and your communities to share something so personal to you.
It must have been difficult to make this video as it would have brought alot of emotions back thinking about things...just remember we are all here for you and never feel bad about having to take time off for any reason. Some people tend to forget you are not a video making machine and you have a life outside of all this.
I for one enjoy any content you produce regardless of its frequency. I find you an inspiration how you connect with your twitch and youtube communities and able to see the positives in most things, you always bring the laughs with the people you interact with...you truly are my favorite youtuber and twitch streamer (I have donated to you a couple of times during your streams but due to timezone differences I do not get to catch you live often...but i watch most of your vods)
Thankyou for making this video, I know it must have been tough for you to do. I look forward to all your future content :)
That is very nice: yerolo
yerolo Mate that is such a beautiful comment. Congrats to you.
So thats why you been away so long sorry for your loss i lost my grandma two days after you lost your mom my condolences to you and the family
Thank you for posting this, Squirrel. I am getting ready to head home in a few days, as my grandfather is in his final days. This actually helps me prepare myself for what about to happen. My condolences to you and your family and thank you for sharing your memories with us.
Rest In Peace, I’m sure she’d be very proud of all your great work. ❤️
I'm just curious to know who the 31 people were who disliked this video 😒 Anyway, sorry for you loss Paul. I was in America and my dad passed away in the back of his car on the way to the hospital in Nigeria. Acute Pneumonia they called it. I did not get to say goodbye either. It gets better...eventually as you know. May she rest on. Good to hear from you again.
Nna-dozie E some people dislike videos that involve loved ones passing on as a sign of a way to be saying “No this can’t be” with a video like this. The dislike button is a mixture of emotions. I liked the video but I used to be one do the dislikes on videos like these because I was confused. “Should I like it or dislike it. A great tubers mother had passed. Hnnnn~ dislike because of remorse.” But I like these videos now because of the strength of these tubers.
Rainbow Blazie now that makes sense. I never thought of it that way. Thank you for that.
R.I.P. squirrels mom
repmacibin yes
100 % respect to you squirrel and sorry about your loss
Having lost my mother in 2015, I feel your pain. Sorry for your loss squirrel. The pain will always be there but cherish the good times. Thanks for sharing and thanks for all you do for all of us sir.
RIP sorry for your loss. Huge respect. We are happy you are back
RIP squirrels Mum we all understand why you haven’t made videos stay strong mate
That was a lovely intro Paul
That intro made tears in my eyes. And hear you talk about her is something special, and it makes you an even more special youtuber.
I think you deserve over a million subscribers. And talking about that, I’ve just noticed that you are just about to hit 600.000 subs, so congrats to you!
Dude i am feeling very bad after hearing the news.. take care...
Sincere condolences on the loss of your mother. I totally understand what you went through as it happened to me a few years ago.
Re the spring mod - and assuming that’s Grimes frosty winter you have - his spring v2.7 is updated for ETS2 v 1.30.
Good to see you back Squirrel. This video was brave, moving and compelling. Respect. o7
So sorry man hope you are ok and may your mother and father both rest in peace in heaven
ROBEF 1heaven?
he spelt it correctly so shut up he was being kind to Paul Beucase he Lost both of his Mother and Father so be Respectfull !
Julian leave
Even though it's awkward to get such responses from an internet stranger, I feel like leaving a like isn't enough. I'm sorry for your loss, Squirrel. May she rest in peace. The way you put it, the way you've come back to videos, the way you made this personal journey is really touching. We're all happy to hear that you are well and ready to make videos again. Thank you for being you and being strong.
God bless you
I know what its like, i lost 3 of my grandparents within 8 months of each other....... im 13
Ouch man, I hope you are doing well now.
noodleWrecker7 thanks for the concern, im doing fine
You mean that you don't live with your actual mom or dad?
Róbert Balázs Lőrincz grandparent is your mother or father of your parent which means you have 4 grandparents
I grew up in a foster family so i had 8 of them , and i lost them all . But i am close to 30 ,,, Still to soon for many of them
Thank you for this very heartfelt video. My mother actually passed away near the end of November, and I agree with much of what you’ve said. I commend you for your honesty and I pray you will continue to be blessed and comforted. I live in the US, but I’m actually traveling to the UK for the first time later this spring! I thought I’d tell you that I’m living a very similar reality to yours, again, thank you. - JD
RIP I am so sorry for your loss.
I know how you feel. I lost my grandma over Christmas and it still hurts to think about. Also glad to hear your back and can’t wait to see more of your videos.
*Deepest condolences*
2018 is going to be a great year for you! I want to thank you for inviting us all into the processing of your grief for your mom. Your honesty and emotion was very touching. I wish I could shake your hand and give you a pat on the back, to express my condolences. My best wishes to you and your family.
Dementia causing her to stop smoking reminds me of something my mother used to say, "there's nothing so bad it's not good for something."
I like that.
I, for one, missed your videos. So sorry about your Mom. I've lost both my parents now. I think one of the hardest things for me was the fact that I'm here on the west coast and they were thousands of miles away. You read in the obits about all these people passing away surrounded by family. After my Dad died, back in 90 or 91, and ever since, I can hardly listen to "Living Years" by Mike and the Mechanics. Just about every word applies to me and my relationship with him.
Glad you're back!
Identity releases Module 1 on March 21st Paul.I backed them too and upgraded to the Biker pledge.
Thanks Paul for creating such great content, I found your channel years ago when you was building your PC in an attempt to find a competent guide, I found this and more I started watching your collection of videos on ETS2 and instantly found a hobby I could get behind. Your videos have been there for me when I needed them, so i can hope that the community you provide for can provide for you through this tough time, best of wishes, happy trucking.
I don't accept your apology because you don't have any reason to apologize anything in my eyes. :) It's great you took the time you felt you needed to get your mindset right to get yourself back in working mode. Everybody grieves in a different way and it doesn't stop. Oh, I almost forgot: my condolences about (or is it for? [we Finns don't have all these unlogical little words but we do have lots of different ends to the word ;) ]) your loss.
I struggle with a dementia through my dad whose 93 yo mum is really losing her memories. We just got her a nursery spot two weeks ago. My other 86 yo grand mum is also struggling remembering things but she's living with my mum.
It was so nice to hear about your plans to live out some parts of the games you play! Keep on with them! Until next time... [insert some horn sounds here] :)
I live in Vegas, I'll be there for sure. There are a couple pubs in town that will make you feel right at home. Make sure you visit McMullen's Irish Pub and The Crown and Anchor. The Irish breakfast at McMullen's is top notch and the fish and chips at the crown and anchor are spot on.
So sorry. This was sad watching.. I don´t know what to say.. I think the only thing I can say is that we are here for you, and you can take as much time as you want. We can wait.
I send u a hug from sweden 🙏🏻 lost my mom When I was 7 years old n my dad around 18teen !
About the euro games all I can say is that u really help me ”to feel like Im drivning again” got stroke in december 2016 n still paralysed in left arm n leg so live my life in a wheelchair n also have problems with my eyes !so thank u for your videos thank u so much for doing this 🙏🏻❤️😊
Sorry for your lost paul. Let your mother have a good time above the clouds.
Glad to see you're back Paul! I'm so sorry for your loss... I unfortunately lost my grandfather to dementia early January of this year, I can understand the struggle you must have had to go through... to an extent. Once again, my condolences mate, hope things get better for you in 2018!
I feel sorry for you squrril your videos are grate keep trucking for your mum I'm short she's prowd of you and you made me cry my name is Levi
You did what you had too do ...Never be sorry for that . I lost my dad nearly 10 years ago now and it is difficult losing a loved one ,especially a parent . Happy to see your back ...squirrel love and huge respect for wearing your heart on your sleeve making this video .
Sorry for your loss Paul! Glad you're still around to make videos when you can. Keep on Truckin'!
I'm sorry for you los squirrel
Paul I have been watching your vids for 2 years now and I love all of your vids.
when I heard that your mum had passed away I was shocked.
keep up the good work paul.
AND REMEMBER WE ARE ALL HERE FOR YOU!
I’m sorry about your mother Paul...
Hey Paul.
Thanks for this video. It must have been a hard time and You have my condolences for you and your familys loss.
I was indeed missing your fabulous videos and was wandering when you would make new once. Im so glad that you toke your time the come out on the other side. You were missed.
Wow, I really like your Videos and your voice.
The story is quite sad, but I think it's very touchy.
Greetings Michael
I’m am literally in tears for you I had a similar thing happen to me in 2017 my very close uncle had been saved many times in hospital but he eventually gave up. I also had similar thoughts. My mother had sorted out the funeral and the amount of paperwork that had to be signed etc. RIP for your mother. God bless you.
Man.. I almost started crying from this.. I am truly sorry Paul
So sorry for your loss. Your video was both a wonderful tribute to your mum and a nice introduction to where you want to go. As for vids of crap games, I think you should post honest videos about sims you think aren’t worth buying because you are a trusted voice in the sim community. Take care!
sorry to hear about your mum I'm sure she would like you to be happy
hope to see you at truckfest will you be there Saturday, Sunday, Monday?
Welcome back Paul, and so sorry to hear about your mum! Lost my brother 2 years ago and I understand where you are coming from. Take care and take your time on the videos.
I have enjoyed your videos for over a year. I am sorry for your loss. I do hope you have a good 2018. Look forward to your future videos. Best regards.
Rip SOS love you vids
No problem Squirell. Sorry for your loss. Be safe. I hope you back and be happy again with making videos.
Lovely message at start of the video, Really sorry for you loss can't imagine how hard it is for you, hope all the best for you and your family and it's great to see you making videos again :)
Sorry to hear the passing of your mum. Sending all my support and best wishes to you and your family. Take as much time as you need, we all understand.
It's great to have you back Paul, I know about your mom from your streams on Twitch. I feel with you i lost my own dad 2 years ago so i know all about how it feels. hope mother SQRL Rest in Peace. SQRLlove from BCS and Cindy
So sorry for your loss. I know it's tough and I'm happy you took the time to talk to us about it. Take your time getting back in the swing of things.
Paul, in my 18 years on this planet, I have lost my Granddad, My Grandma, so far
The Mad Trucker both of my grandpas died before I was born so I never got to see them
My father died when i was 7 and my both of my grandfathers died before i was born
I can't remember the Sunday night trucking song word for word (it's been a while) but I know it says "You'll always have a friend" Many people have needed the friendship and understanding of the Nut house and this time it was you who needed it. Completely understandable.
Sorry for your loss Paul,
I lost my Dad in August after a long battle with cancer.
After you get the news your basically in a shock for a few days no matter how much your prepared.
But this shock is good to let you go through the next days after it.
It's not to image how you feel after all. But I can tell you, things get better with time goes on and you find yourself carrying on.
Best wishes to you and your family.
Stay how you are, you're just a great Personality :)
Extremely sorry for your loss and My deepest Condolences
Squirrel and your families. May her soul REST IN PEACE.
I never got to see my great grandmother for 3 months and when she passed away in 2016 it has been haunting me for 2 years
Thanks Squirrel for taking us into your world.... all the best to you and yours.
i know how you feel Squirrel. I live with my grandmother and she has early stages of alzheimer disease and her short time memory are gone.. and we (her family) does not want to put her in a home to fade away so instead i live with her to take care of her.. keep up the good work love from Norway
I'm sorry to hear about your loss. That was a very lovely intro and I really do hope you and your brother are doing well. Take care and may your mom rest in peace.
So sorry for your loss. Thanks for sharing, glad to see you're ok.
So mom will never come home and see your summer car..?
Anyway i hope you're feeling okay, it gets better.
Paul, I’ve followed you for years. You’re my guilty pleasure on UA-cam and your videos are always the highest standard. A lot of people love the work you do and admire you as a person. I’m so sorry for your loss and my thoughts are with you and your family at this time. We all hope you begin to feel better, because at the end of the day, we all care for you. ❤️❤️
Sorry for your loss Paul... Real sorry to hear about your mom, your video scared me a bit since. Y mom is real sick too, and last Christmas was an eye opener... Life is too short to worry about minor thing, we have to focus on the things that matter
I had to go through this at the start of the new year and it sucks cause you can't do anything about it except be positive about it and I couldn't play games at all and it's rubbish losing someone you love but keep positive about it squirrel and keep making the best vids and don't feel pressured to make them because we will be here for you
Know exactly what you are going through Paul, and it hurts so bad! You will never get over it,but something you have to learn to live with. Take all the time you need! It is very understandable! R.I.P Mama Squirrel.
Paul you are the best youtuber i've seen in quite a while and to hear this news made me nearly cry. I can not understand how it must be for you, but all I can hope is that you and your family and all the other people that knew you mother are all alright. I am shocked by this news and therefore my condolences for everyone that knew your mother. Good luck for all of you and you in particular Paul.
You're the best
Sorry for your loss, very brave to talk about it to lots of people. Hope 2018 goes better for you
So sorry for your loss Paul, I have no idea how you feel as I've never personally lost anyone but I imagine it is very, very hard to deal with, and at no point should you feel you need to come back nor apologise for your absence as like you say it's very difficult to come back from something such as this. I wish you and your family the best Paul!
Sorry for your loss Paul. Keep up the great videos and I will see you on the next videos. R.I.P
Paul I’m so sorry to hear that, things will get better over time. Don’t feel as though you need to rush back into making videos. Wishing you and family love at this hard time.
Kindest regards,
Elliott 👍
Don't be sorry. You had and will have various things to deal with. Glad you feel better and happy that you're back making videos. I have no real idea about who you are but you seem to be a great guy, straight forward and no nonsense.. All the best- keep going.
Squirrel,
May your mother rest in peace. I wish you and your family all the best in the future.
I have watched your videos ever since you did the ETS2 Oversize Load. Keep up the great videos.
Oh Paul, my condolences from Germany. I can so very much feel you. My parents are well, but they are both over 75 now and I am so afraid of loosing them. Since I am their only child and do not have a family of my own, it will be a big challenge for me... hopefully in a very far future. I think it was a good decision to take some time of and get your head straight. I'm glad that you are back now and I'm looking forward to lots of great videos. All the best and keep on keeping on, mate!
Really good to see you back with with another excellent trucking video. Sorry to hear the news about your mother and fully understand the situation. Really looking forward to your output over the the rest of 2018.
A huge respect to you, for talking about it.
Personally:
My parents have come to an age they could pass away any time. And my dad has some form of dementia. My mother is heart-patient/'sugar'-patient. At the end of 2016 it was almost done for my mother but the hospital managed to get her back on her feet. That was a wake-up call for my mother to re-plan her daily habits/jobs.
And then at the beginning of 2017 I lost my aunt. She was a smoker and died because of tumor after tumor. We did manage to say goodbye a couple of months before that. But still it was hard. Maybe even harder then with grandma.
Thank you so much for sharing with us. No need to apologize for taking time away to work through your grief. Thank you for all your great content, looking forward to watching your 2018 adventures :)
Hi Paul. My dad passed last year, in June. Thanks for talking about your sorrow and loss. Grieving takes time, and hearing you talk about your experience helps me continue my own journey. It seems fitting that a channel dedicated to simulated travel helps us navigate challenges in our outside lives as well. I did miss your videos while you were working through the past couple months, and wondered if perhaps you had moved to more Twitch streaming or if the UA-cam ad changes caused you to slow on the production, but now that I know what's happened, the lack of productivity mirrors my own dislocation. Yes, there's a lot to do when someone passes, but it was almost harder for me to motivate myself when there *wasn't* anything to do - the time where I'd have free moments and play video games, for example. My family noticed - I was withdrawn, sad, out of sorts - and it took a couple months to begin to feel myself again. I hope for you that playing games, streaming, making videos, and interacting with the great community here helps you heal and move forward. Cheers to you, your mom and your dad. Keep on trucking.
Seriously dude no need to apologise. I've come across your videos after playing OMSI and CS2015 and am very impressed by your presentations. Thanks so much for sharing your personal experience. Look forward to seeing more videos!
OMG im so sorry paul for your loss we are all here and take all the time you need
I"m so sorry to hear about your loss Paul I hope you take all the time you need to heal that is never easy get well man hugs
I feel very sorry for your loss Paul I can’t imagine the heartbreak you and your family have gone through all I can say is I hope you recover soon and get back to doing what u do best
Hey Paul your an amazing person who I look up to because I know when I am feeling sad, down or nervous with my anxiety I know I can click on your channel or twitch and all of that goes away.
Keep smiling, keep up the good work but still take as much time as you need, I am sure we will all still be here waiting when you come back.
I am so sorry for your loss. I nearly cried at the intro. Take all the time you need from making videos because we won't go anywhere.
Squirrel - thanks so much for this vid. You sound good, like there's a little more spirit in your voice. This whole grieving thing takes time and in many ways, we never fully "get over" the death of a loved one. I lost my dad very suddenly 10 years ago and I miss him every day, but I also try and smile and keep the best memories alive - even though I also stood there and watched him pass. I'm happy for you that you had the opportunity to listen to yourself, do what you needed to do, and now you're back. Glad to have you back in the saddle, mate. Here's to a great 2018. -BlackMutt
This video really helped me gain a better focus on my life and what is important to me.Thank you Paul for your frankness and openness and your great ability to get to the things that matter to all of us. Love your videos and your streams on Twitch.
Hi Paul, I'm very sorry to hear your mother passed away. My condolences to you and your family. I usually don't comment on your videos but I wanted to say to you. I think you're a great guy and you make great videos. The way you are handling the loss of your mother is very respectful and beautiful. Stay strong
I love your honesty and being just human. Keep on doing what you have, and best luck!
Glad to see you back, Squirrel. Sorry to hear about your Mum. I agree DIY is good for the soul. I like your ideas and look forward to future videos.
Firstly, I am so sorry for your loss Paul.
Secondly, Massive respect to you for this open hearted video. A lot of us can relate to your experience of loosing a loved one. I can understand the difficulty around having to deal with it, I lost my grandfather the evening before my Wedding last April, he was so determined to make it to the day, but I think he realised he physically wasnt capable & simple gave up as he didnt want to let me down. So I printed a photo of him the morning of my wedding, put it in a frame and had my 6 year old daughter carry him into the cermony. The wedding was kind of surreal, it helped everyone deal with the hurt and pain of losing him. But after it was all said and done... we crashed emotionally. Its tough and takes time to come round again, but massive respect to you man.
I am loving the plans for Vlog's etc for 2018. Wish I could make it to TF Peterborough... Looking forward to an enteraining year Paul!
Much love fellow human!
my condolences, best wishes to you and your family in this difficult time
Hi. This is the very first video that I have watched of yours - it randomly popped up on my feed and I thought “why not?” 😊 I am so touched by your frankness about the loss of your mother. I can’t / don’t want to imagine how you feel. Being open with your feelings with your followers I think, is a very effective way to aid the healing process. I offer you and your family my deepest sympathies. Keep strong.
I've always fear a sudden phone call from my relative at times that people don't usually call... never good news when such call suddenly come up; so everytime I heard phone rang at unexpected time, my heart just stunt for a moment.