13 Years of marriage, dealing with divorce & moving on - Julz Bakunzi | ThatHusbandPodcast

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  • Опубліковано 10 гру 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 117

  • @The_Dream_Space
    @The_Dream_Space  7 місяців тому +11

    Thank you to all you good people for the support you've shown this channel! ✨
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  • @kabelontobo303
    @kabelontobo303 7 місяців тому +70

    The 1st time I ever heard from God was when he confirmed that my then wife was my wife. We were married for 10 years, separated for 4 going on to 5. I finally got the guts to file beginning of this year and we are just waiting for the matter to be settled/finalized now. I never thought I'd ever get divorced even before I got born again, this was always my belief and only got even more entrenched in my belief system when I received Christ as my Lord and Saviour. One thing that I know is that God never make mistakes. The word that got me through 2022 was "All things work together for those who love the Lord." I still desire marriage in the future but I'm not in a hurry. I'll wait until I can fully give myself to a new person emotionally. Right now I'm enjoying being a Dad to my 15 and 9 year old daughters who stay with me. The rest will come in the right time, but I'm looking forward to it. Marriage is a beautiful institution when both parties are in it for the right reasons.

    • @chosenqueen5109
      @chosenqueen5109 7 місяців тому +12

      How did you know that was the voice of God if you hadn't heard Him before?

    • @Drawingboredi
      @Drawingboredi 7 місяців тому +6

      Did God tell you to divorce too or is it just a personal choice? It's okay also you followed the voice ,played your part for that time. I'm just curious

    • @nonkululekoxaba4820
      @nonkululekoxaba4820 7 місяців тому +5

      Cheers to you King, "all things work together for good to them that love God"

    • @kabelontobo303
      @kabelontobo303 7 місяців тому

      @@chosenqueen5109 Trust me when it's him you'll know. It's different than anything you've ever experienced before. The calmness and peace that comes with it. It's unmistakable. You can't confuse it for anything else.

    • @kabelontobo303
      @kabelontobo303 7 місяців тому

      @@Drawingboredi No he didn't but she's moved on so there's no need to keep holding on to something that's dead. I tried to get an answer from him many times before and all I got was silence.

  • @Lelo_diokana
    @Lelo_diokana 7 місяців тому +52

    Finally something for men!!! I've felt like the ministry of being a husband is being attacked and I just couldn't articulate it and I wasn't seeing a lot of conversations around it...arg, you are doing the Lord's work indeed

  • @nosiphomakhoba5329
    @nosiphomakhoba5329 3 місяці тому +5

    Bumped into this podcast a few days ago and I am loving every minute of it. As a growing christian who aspires to get married soon, it's so refreshing and restoring to know that there are "young" black men of the faith who hold such strong, positive views about marriage. We really didn't have enough "realistic" role models for this institution and some advocates for marriage are not in the faith. So so many gems, I pray that these conversations land on my future husband's YT page🤭

  • @tlaly
    @tlaly 7 місяців тому +50

    Yoh guys🙌🏾what a heart-warming conversation!!! I'm only just discovering your channel via this video and I'm in awe! Our society (without being aware) is DESPERATE for such insights, young-ish (🤭) men opening their hearts to the public about husbandhood??? What? Both of you dropped such GEMS too🤌🏿 Please man this is beautiful beyond words🙌🏾, it's so refreshing 🥹🥹🥹. I listened to the whole hour but the last 15 minutes had a different anointing 🔥🔥🔥. I'm the 2576th subscriber, may there be 97500 after me by next week 😅😌

    • @The_Dream_Space
      @The_Dream_Space  7 місяців тому +3

      What a beautiful message!!! Thank you so much for watching and for catching the vision sis! We believe very much for the, currently, 97333 subbies coming behind you🙌🏾

  • @AyandaIris
    @AyandaIris 7 місяців тому +39

    I am a lady but I am learning a lot from this Podcast Thanks a lot Guys🙌🙏😇

    • @dadaidzvairo9198
      @dadaidzvairo9198 7 місяців тому +2

      You and me sis😉

    • @The_Dream_Space
      @The_Dream_Space  7 місяців тому +2

      Happy the ladies are here! The more we ALL know the better for ALL of us 🙌🏾

  • @puseletsomazibuko5403
    @puseletsomazibuko5403 7 місяців тому +17

    This is the first time I come across your channel, this is refreshing and necessary to see men talk, open up and unashamed about talking about the Lord. I'm here to stay.

    • @The_Dream_Space
      @The_Dream_Space  7 місяців тому

      amen and amen! thanks so much for watching 🙏🏾

  • @yandie_z
    @yandie_z 6 місяців тому +4

    What an admirable man and a mature conversation. Beautiful to see how he is taking accountability of where he could have done better, even though his actions weren't what broke "the camel's back", but as the leader of the family/unit, he can see how he could have done better to manage the situation before it got out of hand. Much respect for him and wish him well in his new marriage. May God continue to restore what the enemy tried to destroy.

  • @siyamthandaaphelelemthembu1656
    @siyamthandaaphelelemthembu1656 7 місяців тому +8

    This was a beautiful conversation. I truly enjoy enjoyed it. I’ve never been married so I have never experienced someone in such close proximity leave the Lord. That must’ve been devastating.
    However I’ve experienced a friend leaving Christ and it grieved me, I never stopped praying and I never stopped trying to have conversations with them but outside of you losing this person you essentially witnessing them lose their identity. I love the picture he painted that it felt like they were walking together and then you turn to your side and you’re no longer walking together
    . With all that being said I encourage everyone in the faith to not only check on the physical well-being when it comes to loved ones but always ask if the person is still praying, are they still having quite time? if not then why? Not say their salvation is your responsibility but I believe we are to help each other run this race well. Check in and pray!

  • @zinedanewikruger7014
    @zinedanewikruger7014 7 місяців тому +20

    Made me think of 'Ownership is nothing;
    MANAGEMENT is key.'
    Thank you🙏

    • @The_Dream_Space
      @The_Dream_Space  7 місяців тому

      That's the one! And thanks so much for watching 🙏🏾

  • @ibugemartha4564
    @ibugemartha4564 7 місяців тому +8

    I love to hear men side of this good thing marriage.
    Uganda the pearl of African.

  • @masegomoruakgomo9033
    @masegomoruakgomo9033 7 місяців тому +4

    First time on the channel and I loved this conversation, the transparency, the accountability, the nuggets of wisdom. The guest did a really great job of explaining his journey in a transparent and respectful way, not bashing the former and not disrespecting his current wife either, very delicate but he’s the first person I’ve heard handle remarriage/divorce subject this way 👏👏 much respect

    • @The_Dream_Space
      @The_Dream_Space  7 місяців тому

      He truly did an amazing job of balancing things with love and grace and honesty. Such a special quality and a true reflection of who he is as a person. Thanks so much for tuning in, hope you get to watch more episodes 🙏🏾

  • @buyihlubi3344
    @buyihlubi3344 7 місяців тому +12

    Wow so many gems in this convo🔥🔥
    In addition to what was said, i took some lessons:
    1. The importance of being with someone who has personal convictions outside of the church /home traditions. It becomes easier to sway from something God hasn't personally revealed. Values are not really values until one understands why.
    2. It was in the moment she found people in her masters class that challenged her world views, that i was reminded of how deceptive the serpent was to Eve - he asked "did God really say you couldn't eat from that tree". In that moment, Eve's view changed. In essence, its important the to discern the kind of seed people plant in your life. Does it draw you away or closer to God?
    Can't wait for next week
    Loved this convo 👏🏼

    • @The_Dream_Space
      @The_Dream_Space  7 місяців тому +4

      It's so crazy cause most of us never want to believe we are influenced by others or the world around us yet it happens all the time. So we have to be intentional about what we take in and make sure to wash ourselves off of what may harm us or where we want to go... Thanks so much for watching 🙏🏾

    • @masegomoruakgomo9033
      @masegomoruakgomo9033 7 місяців тому +3

      Not exactly the same thing but this reminded me of a sermon I heard titled “Who’s whispering into your ear” it was basically about Naomi instructing Ruth and the importance of having the correct voice influence your actions

    • @kabelontobo303
      @kabelontobo303 6 місяців тому +1

      1 Corin 15:33 Bad company corrupts good morals. Don't be a starring and think you can hangout with whoever, wherever and you won't be corrupted. Greater men and women have fallen because of false sense of bo Christian starring.

    • @yonelajafta547
      @yonelajafta547 2 місяці тому

      ​@masegomoruakgomo9033 please share a link to that sermon.

  • @leornardmbatha7156
    @leornardmbatha7156 7 місяців тому +8

    Do you believe in love at first site? I did a subscribe at first minute. Yoh! Y’all killing it. I’m inspired. As a young husband navigating this thing I kinda need this community. Big ups guys. Wow.

    • @The_Dream_Space
      @The_Dream_Space  7 місяців тому

      Love at first sight would be an interesting episode to explore hey. we’ll have to find someone who may have that story to share… thanks so much for watching 🙏🏾

  • @lillymillion
    @lillymillion 7 місяців тому +11

    So many takeaways from this episode, too many to type... wow. Shout out to you Julz! 🙌🏾

  • @mahadimkwanazi3152
    @mahadimkwanazi3152 6 місяців тому +2

    Really great guest! What a solid gent. 😊
    I however struggled a bit with this conversation, I felt like I wanted to know MORE about his journey and less about his ex’s part of it as she isn’t here to speak for herself. It felt like too much was shared about her (she could be okay with it or not, I don’t know obviously) but my point is I would’ve loved to hear more about how he processed all of this for himself, without so many details about her. I’m still yet to watch part 2 so maybe this was needed for context I don’t know, I just know I struggled. But I also appreciated the vulnerability of this conversation. And I suppose inevitably details will be shared about the other as a marriage does make your lives one. So I suppose mixed feelings.
    PS You are doing great work on this platform though! Big ups

  • @SisiM-fu4xq
    @SisiM-fu4xq 7 місяців тому +4

    Wow I love this podcast. It’s needed

  • @lesegobabypuso8795
    @lesegobabypuso8795 7 місяців тому +4

    What a heartwarming conversation between two men. Just came across this podcast and I’m thoroughly encouraged. We don’t see enough men talk about so honestly about God and their family life. More of these please

    • @The_Dream_Space
      @The_Dream_Space  7 місяців тому

      Thanks so much for clicking and watching, so happy to have you 🙏🏾 We release this podcast every Wednesday at 11:30 so definitely stuck around. You can also turn notifications so you don't miss next week 😉

  • @PhilasandeMalevu
    @PhilasandeMalevu 7 місяців тому +8

    Julz is a gem fam

    • @The_Dream_Space
      @The_Dream_Space  7 місяців тому +3

      He's a solid brother. Good to see you over here as well bro! Thanks for watching 🙏🏾

  • @gugungonyama1341
    @gugungonyama1341 7 місяців тому +5

    Shout out to Juls! Still the same gent from His People and living with us at the commune back in 2007. So genuine and consistent ❤

  • @linetk5444
    @linetk5444 7 місяців тому +2

    Wow, such a beautiful, real and encouraging conversation, rooted in the Gospel... I hope we see more of these. Thanks you guys 🙌🏽

  • @nolwazindlovu2320
    @nolwazindlovu2320 7 місяців тому +6

    This might be my fav episode for the year so far. There very clear points communicated.. Cause a husband shouldn’t be liberal is a powerful statement… be a lion as well. This episode very key. 👌🏾The chemistry was also so enjoyable.

    • @The_Dream_Space
      @The_Dream_Space  7 місяців тому

      Yeah its definitely up there but we have just begun :) Thanks Nola!

  • @anda2736
    @anda2736 5 місяців тому

    Yo we just had Julz in our church the past 6 months at ENB, what a fantastic conversation 👏🏾. Honestly have been encouraged by this

  • @adelineduiker5460
    @adelineduiker5460 Місяць тому +1

    "God didn't make it perfect, he made it good"❤‍🔥❤‍🔥❤‍🔥

  • @yasminekazadi1656
    @yasminekazadi1656 7 місяців тому +5

    God bless you for this Podcast, My goodness, this is divine and needed. For all of us fighting for our marriages.

    • @The_Dream_Space
      @The_Dream_Space  7 місяців тому

      Amen and amen! Thanks so much, and I pray God strengthens all of us

  • @kingdomliving-kingdomconve5511
    @kingdomliving-kingdomconve5511 7 місяців тому +2

    The counsel you gave the friend starting a new business, top tier Sir!!

  • @opfamakhuvha2361
    @opfamakhuvha2361 10 годин тому

    My Pastor 🥳I'm Happy for you Pastor Julz

  • @1234prettyhead
    @1234prettyhead 7 місяців тому +6

    This was beautiful to watch.

  • @nonkululekoxaba4820
    @nonkululekoxaba4820 7 місяців тому

    First time here, I absolutely enjoyed the conversation. So healthy, and Godly.
    I would definitely not think twice to marry a wholesome divorcee like this Man of God.

  • @karensinclair4922
    @karensinclair4922 7 місяців тому +9

    Great chat boys, my take is: As husbands you can lead but you can't control.
    At the end of the day, your gal was grown, she had her own relationship with God.
    She excercised her God-given free will and walked away from both God and you.
    We minimise this lady's personal agency by inferring you failed to lead some poor misguided / naive / weak/ woman.
    James 1:14 " each person is tempted when they are dragged away by their own evil desire and enticed."
    Proverbs14:1 "A wise woman builds her home, but a foolish woman tears it down with her own hands."

  • @IT6PR
    @IT6PR 7 місяців тому +4

    I was there in that period where young black men were inspired to mary at His People, Jhb. You had to be there +/- 2006.
    It was beautiful to see young black men being inspired to take up the call of being husbands.
    I love to hear Julez reflect on that.
    I am deeply sorry to hear that things didn't work out with first wife Ps Julez. I loved you both, and love the grace arround it all...

  • @Amza101
    @Amza101 7 місяців тому +5

    Yho this was amazing!!!

  • @Engetelani
    @Engetelani 7 місяців тому +6

    Loved this episode so much 👏🏾

  • @yolisalisanqari
    @yolisalisanqari 7 місяців тому +2

    Wow this has been a great episode, I just said to myself let me comment before I go listen the 3rd time now. 😅 I am out here taking notes, thank you Pst Julz for coming in❤ I love the sense of humor in here 😅must say. Please Sir let the Lion roar and of course the lamb be in there too. I see your current marriage working sir and beautifully so.
    Thank you @TheDreamSpace for such a powerful installment ❤
    Enkosini guys❤

  • @WordsPictures997
    @WordsPictures997 7 місяців тому

    Absolutely needed that note on " friendship ". That was very sobering.
    Thank you Gentlemen!

  • @bantukazimini4274
    @bantukazimini4274 7 місяців тому +5

    Yhooo bro you coming hard....these episodes have been a lot..... Yhoo....Relax.... Yhooo.... Im still recovering from the previous ones ....😂😂😂😂 Bless you this is good for them husband's...im also learning a lot....the is so much realness 🙏🏽

    • @The_Dream_Space
      @The_Dream_Space  7 місяців тому +1

      😂 We not resting little sis!! Thanks so much for supporting 🙏🏾

  • @lillymillion
    @lillymillion 7 місяців тому +3

    I know we are very much in our feels (including me) but 50:12 - 50:40 "I bless people and help them find steps towards their destinies" took me out!!! 😂

    • @The_Dream_Space
      @The_Dream_Space  7 місяців тому

      It's okay to tell the truth! 😂😂😂

  • @nokuthulaphakathi2798
    @nokuthulaphakathi2798 7 місяців тому

    I love this may the good God continue to make man be open and teach one another.

  • @snenhlanhlamashile6398
    @snenhlanhlamashile6398 7 місяців тому +3

    Definitely tuning in tonight ❤

  • @DiscoveringKatlego
    @DiscoveringKatlego 7 місяців тому +4

    The intro got me killing the subscribe button

    • @The_Dream_Space
      @The_Dream_Space  7 місяців тому

      Thank you!!! We worked hard on that 🙌🏾

  • @LesediShai-q5h
    @LesediShai-q5h 2 місяці тому

    Wow Pastor Julz! His responses are so well thought through and well articulated 🥹 didn’t expect what I got from this episode . Thank you guys 🙏🏾

  • @BlissfulConversationswithLelo
    @BlissfulConversationswithLelo 5 місяців тому

    Shuuu what a wholesome conversation 🤍

  • @unathiludaka6032
    @unathiludaka6032 3 місяці тому

    I am married to someone who doesn't go to church anymore, this bothered me at first, and i even wanted to call off the marriage bt I got a point where I spoke to my inner person and be lyk" you love him ryt? You understand God is your own way n heaven is your promised land and do wat God want you to do n he will hear your heart " and now am 7 years and months happily married n waiting for God to heart my heart about him❤

  • @Pinki0134
    @Pinki0134 7 місяців тому +2

    Grace all over this testimony...even in the way the story is told. Very encouraging and rare.

    • @The_Dream_Space
      @The_Dream_Space  7 місяців тому

      Agreed! Julz did an impeccable job in expressing his story accurately but with grace and accountability. Thanks so much for watching 🙏🏾

  • @Nandy_Nyc
    @Nandy_Nyc 7 місяців тому +1

    This was wholesome

  • @wendymashiyane1025
    @wendymashiyane1025 7 місяців тому +6

    This was too beautiful to watch🥺🥺❤

  • @ntomboxolosontsonga9608
    @ntomboxolosontsonga9608 7 місяців тому +3

    Just subscribed for my partner. I hope he grasps what your channel wants to promote. Keep going

    • @The_Dream_Space
      @The_Dream_Space  7 місяців тому +1

      I hope so too. Thank so much for watching and the encouragement 🙏🏾

  • @Vutlhari_Mathebula
    @Vutlhari_Mathebula 7 місяців тому +4

    Here I am all the way from tik-tock🎉🎉

    • @The_Dream_Space
      @The_Dream_Space  7 місяців тому

      thanks for tuning in!!!! 🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾

  • @ZakaniNgqokotya
    @ZakaniNgqokotya 7 місяців тому +2

    Also please consider iniquity found in the blood of both couples. That comes in because of their legal right to come and collect in the form of finding yourself not interested in your partner any more, out of nowhere not interested in fighting for your marriage coz Satan had infiltrate it. Expecially when u know God told about your partner... but I'm glad of wat your doing because this is important for men find people to account to expecially mem particular saved men

  • @thokozanimkhize7617
    @thokozanimkhize7617 4 місяці тому

    I wonder what made/caused that shift for her in her faith for her to move in a completely different direction. In my observations a lot of people who are deconstructing, experience a disappointment or hurt of some kind where they then struggle to reconcile the faith or God with whatever has caused the rift and the idea that this will somehow work for their good.

  • @AyandaIris
    @AyandaIris 7 місяців тому +2

    Hey bro you're not alone in this walking away instead of resolving it which is not Good but we're working on it

    • @The_Dream_Space
      @The_Dream_Space  7 місяців тому +1

      Keep working on it and praying for guidance as well 🙏🏾

  • @emba_d
    @emba_d 7 місяців тому +6

    YEY YEY YEY YEY!! What in the world is going on in this episode🤯🔥🤺🤺🤺
    Do y’all really want us to timestamp every minute?😮
    I’ve just gone through WAY too many emotions in one hour😮‍💨 Nah y’all went off🤒

    • @The_Dream_Space
      @The_Dream_Space  7 місяців тому

      Give us the timestamps! 😂

    • @emba_d
      @emba_d 7 місяців тому +2

      @@The_Dream_Space There’s too many, I’ve had to watch this episode 3 times. He needs to come back after next week to double click on some stuff. But 42:50 literally made me go get a glass of water the first time I watched.
      Shoutout to Julz. Don’t know how he’s able to crack jokes while sharing this 🍃

  • @yvonneoshevwe2334
    @yvonneoshevwe2334 7 місяців тому

    Can you allow the save button please? Thank you

    • @The_Dream_Space
      @The_Dream_Space  7 місяців тому

      Hi not sure what you mean... We don't control the save button. UA-cam allows all videos to be saved to personal or public playlists

  • @joshchabalaendure6223
    @joshchabalaendure6223 7 місяців тому +1

    This is great, are you on Spotify?

    • @The_Dream_Space
      @The_Dream_Space  7 місяців тому +1

      Hey thanks so much, yes we are set up now open.spotify.com/show/4niQ41FftbvrNUfILSXjCR

  • @brendahlungwani2538
    @brendahlungwani2538 3 місяці тому

    "The will of God is subject to the will of man in marriage". Can two walk together unless they agree?

  • @hildamoeketsi4712
    @hildamoeketsi4712 3 місяці тому

    This site of the world is aesthetic💫✨️💛👌.Thank you for holding the space of Masculines🙏

  • @KamurukoVillage
    @KamurukoVillage 7 місяців тому +1

    Edifying really... Confident it's doable and that's it's desirable

    • @The_Dream_Space
      @The_Dream_Space  7 місяців тому

      definitely! thanks so much watching 🙏🏾

  • @innocentiaradebe9314
    @innocentiaradebe9314 7 місяців тому +1

    ❤❤

  • @nosipheloduduma3735
    @nosipheloduduma3735 7 місяців тому +1

    This conversation 😢😢😢😢

  • @rrekomane9631
    @rrekomane9631 4 місяці тому

    I love Ugandans hey, Ugandans and Kenyans specifically

  • @HarveySidney-r7o
    @HarveySidney-r7o 2 місяці тому

    Martin Gary Hall Kevin Wilson Michelle

  • @disciple8531
    @disciple8531 4 місяці тому

    How do you realize years later that your wife was not following you? What made her change/ deviate from being a follower of Christ? What exactly did she not like about the church?
    People don't backslide from serving Christ overnight. It happens overtime.
    For me, I felt like kukho angakukhulumiyo... Not 100% transparent.
    As a believer in Christ to other fellow believers. What's your stance on the scriptures about divorcing and remarrying while the other spouse is still alive?

    • @The_Dream_Space
      @The_Dream_Space  4 місяці тому +1

      Hey thanks so much for watching. We are not not sure how far you have gotten into the episode. Gonna answer some questions below.
      - he explains clearly the issues she began to develop with the faith when faced with the new spiritual beliefs she developed and was interested in.
      - he explains clearly that the backsliding was over the course of a few years and small decisions and concessions that lead to it.
      - it’s up to him how much he chooses to share we cannot force more. He was already extremely generous
      - he is remarried so I think his the stance is quite clear please do check out the episode following this one 🙏🏾

  • @sandilekhumalo198
    @sandilekhumalo198 7 місяців тому +5

    Mr interviewer try to ask short and straight to the point questions, l feel like you are talking more than your guest. And u keep interrupting

  • @ndumisodlamini711
    @ndumisodlamini711 7 місяців тому

    First time watching your podcast. My concern though, as long as there's no opportunity to hear from the other. Rather stay away from details. Adam, did not divorce Eve. That is, if you heard from God. God is Alpha & Omega. Certainly, in that context, God knew your future. P
    Perhaps, I declare, twice I have been divorced. Yet am a devoted Christian all my life.

    • @The_Dream_Space
      @The_Dream_Space  7 місяців тому +1

      thanks for watching and the feedback. Everyone has the right to share their story if they choose to and when it suits them. This was an opportunity our guest took for himself. if the other party ever wished to, that would be her choice.

  • @dineomoaisi6724
    @dineomoaisi6724 7 місяців тому +4

    Blaque 🤌🏾 This was gold🎉 Proper gems dropped here

    • @The_Dream_Space
      @The_Dream_Space  7 місяців тому

      Nothing but gems!!! Thanks so much for watching 🙏🏾

  • @WordsPictures997
    @WordsPictures997 7 місяців тому +2

    Absolutely needed that note on " friendship ". That was very sobering.
    Thank you Gentlemen!

    • @The_Dream_Space
      @The_Dream_Space  7 місяців тому

      Agreed! That was an unexpected but such a necessary point... Thanks so much for watching🙏🏾