In my experience, as a woman of nearly 60, men aged over 60 who are looking for a partner want one who will settle down and live a quiet life with them, care for them and be looked after. Whereas most women over 60 who are looking for a partner want to spend our later lives gaining new experiences and want someone to share adventures with and break from the traditional norm of relationships because we've usually already spent many years in traditional, caring roles.
You are right, but luckily I found a 67 year old guy that is still looking for adventure and fun. We are planning a month long camping trip this summer, after he takes Kayak lessons so he can join me on some shorter kayaking trips. Lucky me. PS we enjoy our nights together too ;) I'm 65
I can tell you from experience what most older men don't want. A friendship. I love being single, but would also enjoy a close friendship with a man. I've discovered that most aren't even open to ease into a relationship as friends. It's very puzzling to me. At 61, you'd think I'd have it all figured out. Good thing I'm content being on my own. 😊
@@patrickdunn8918 Wow! I have other people in my life that help with tasks I can't do myself. A person isn't single for many years, without developing resources! And your comment is exactly why it's so hard to find genuine people that want to offer their friendship! Its sounds like you're afraid of being "used". So sad.
I was a nurse for 44years. Now retired. Looked after my family too, of course. Most older men I have met want a nurse or a purse, preferably both, to become their cook, cleaner, washerwoman ,housekeeper. Once a man learns I was a nurse their eyes light up !! I don't need anyone else to look after. Am enjoying MY TIME now.
Those are two women out of millions. Many women I know want a monogamous, loyal, committed, safe relationship where one can be their true self, and the man can too, and work together as a team. We are supposed to achieve a higher level together and bring out the best in one another. Having the same values is key; otherwise, the relationship will go south. I am sorry that you were hurt. You did not deserve that. I will pray for your healing. You were with the wrong women. @@ufxpnv
@@ufxpnv It sounds like you are meeting (and marrying) the wrong women. Try finding a group that contains women that you can make friends with and talk to. Then make friends and just talk and hang out, paying your own way unless it is something you or the other person really wants to do and needs someone to go (in that case, I would pay for both). After getting to know some women as friends, I would be surprised if you did not find someone you enjoy and have easy conversations with... when that happens, offer a more date style outing and, if she agrees and keeps acting like your friend and seems to be attracted to you also (I assume you can tell by now) then you have a good base for a REAL committed relationship. You should also know the woman enough by then to know their ethics and values, too. Of course, I am no expert and have no idea if you did exactly that before. I just know I have never cheated on (or with a married man) any man, including a husband that wouldn't work, yelled all the time and expected me to make the money, raise our special needs daughter and take care of the house. I stayed much longer than I should have, but NEVER once considered cheating. I finally left, though. I am just saying, if you think it will happen, it probably will and if you treat it like a friendship at first, it won't matter and you can go your own way before becoming too involved. I will step off my probably ridiculous sounding soap box now. 🙄 I wish you the best in finding a good woman!
There is risk involved in a second marriage.( First ones as well, but with way less baggage!) There are more factors now: children, emotional scars, health problems, and financial issues. DO NOT REMARRY UNLESS YOU ARE SURE YOU ARE WILLING TO ACCEPT THE POSSIBLE CONSEQUENCES.
marriage being a 3 way contract is never a good deal but to bar assn and state extra rediculous after 50 as most women can t get pregnant and protecting children is off the table
@@angieharipershad588 Along with that, most relationships involve compromise. Unfortunatly, the word 'compromise' cannot be found in either my Oxford or Webster's dictionaries, LOL! A woman friend who is 61, was married twice, and says she never wants a man in her life again; because she would always have to be there for a husband, and she would not be able to enjoy days out, or talking on the phone with friends. Bein tied down can really limit one's independence. And, the dynamics of romantic relationships are often better between older woman yonger man partnerships, which is the reverse of what most men are looking for.
I just turned 62 and only date guys my age or a few years younger. Most men I meet want an equal partner, someone with a sense of humor and who is smart. Granted, I have a high powered job and earn a lot of money. All the men I have dated want someone intelligent, funny, emotional honest and available. If I acted like she suggested they would look at me as if I had 2 heads. Be yourself! You have to live you every day.
It makes sense you would date younger men. I recently retired at 59 and want to slow travel, a career woman has no time for any of that. Retired single women my age are rare. I’m too old for you as most retired men would be.. You are correct about what an older man wants. Sense of humor and smart that typically means they are nice to be around.
but women biologically age 1 decade faster and adding that handicapp to a relationship just makes things much harder to b actually functional and lasting
@@chris532008 then why do many men look/act older at the same age? Most of them have more health problems when they are in the same age group. And then they die at a younger age than women on average.
@@annwrog many do those who live hard and fast i don t see them in the equation and at 62 u should not really encounter them i m talking bout the others
Amen! Love! Love my freedom..freedom of not looking after another adult. Freedom of not checking in every hour 😅 How much money I make, spend..give😂😂😂 I get to train early in the morning or late at night..( not conditioned by another’s feeding schedule) my list just goes on and on😂😂😂😂❤
I had a great woman for 30 yrs god took her from me I been alone since havnt dated anybody so I'm still alone George most thenlaydirs I talk to think I'm rich all want moneneney
I'm 62 look great for my age & here's the reality. The men my age who are falling apart would love to have me as their nurse, of course thats not what I'm looking for. The men in their 60s who have taken care of themselves as I have, who are financially secure as I am....they can get a girl 20 years younger than them....so.....finding a quality man who could easily get your daughter.....to choose to date you.....is challenging. I haven't given up but I think I'm about to break my lifetime rule & date younger men.
You are right but those women 20 yrs younger won’t stay around when the men age, don’t look as good, can’t preform, even with money, younger women want younger studs!!
I couldn’t agree more with you, Nicki Snyder..I’m 57, and I’m in good physical health, and men my age that are in good health & take care of themselves only want women 20 years younger! I refuse to be another caregiver-I made the mistake of getting involved with an abusive narcissist that was a lot older than me, and the last 3 years of his life I was a full-time (day & night) caregiver and was belittled and totally unappreciated. But who walks out on someone dying, especially someone you’ve invested several years in?? He’s been gone for a year now, and I’m still recovering from the abuse and not ready to get involved. But I do NOT want to get stuck in that trap ever again.
I have been a successful career women, am well educated and know what I like to be happy. I’m not about to change that for some insecure man who wants to be my hero. I honestly do not think what was discussed is reality in terms of what men want. Try intelligence, respect, shared interests, sense of humour, a women who takes care of herself in grooming and dressing, and companionship enjoyed in a variety of situations.
@@mindexpanding1 It’s my husbands reality and we have shared 25 years of marriage recognizing each other’s strengths that each of us sought in a partner.
Who says women weren't allowed to go to college??? My mother had a double major in college in the 1930s, worked a job after school, and surfed, raced cars on the salt flats! She had 4 brothers.
Your mother's story is not 'every woman's story.' The vast majority of women in those days did NOT go to college. A significant number of people didn't even finish high school back then! It's not like nowadays where just about anyone with a laptop can go to college.
@@americanwoman445 In those days, college was cheap enough for a farmer's daughter. Better still, my grandmother didn't even have the option of going 200K in debt for a degree in Women's Studies, qualifying her for little more than Head Patriarchy Smasher at Starbucks. 😄
To carriered ..... I might know what you mean about dating widowers. I was friends with a widower for about nine months, and all he ever talked about was his wife ..... how wonderful she was, how talented she was, how gorgeous she was, how she made him see certain things, how she convinced him to go on trips, etc.. He burst into tears five times a day, even though his wife had died six years earlier! And when he wrote me emails, usually 15 pages long, telling me what wonderful things his wife had done, if I didn't comment enough and agree enough about how wonderful she was, he would get really angry, and I do mean really angry. If you date a widower, or are even just friends with one, there is a good chance that you will ALWAYS be second in his life. I would never date a widower.
@@galaxy98765 My ex wife was all of those things too and I lost her to a divorce, WTH is the difference, she's gone too? I don't look at things that way, if she's gone, I will start over. I would dump him in a heartbeat!
I just want a companion . someone to go out with on occasion and maybe cook a meal every 3 months. Watch a good movie or go see one. You know, things like that.
@@porcupineparty8598 exactly. Why women need a man just to cook them a steak, go to movies… Sorry, but men can’t be just “friends” forever. They start feeling used.
@@SUPERSTREETMUSTANG I'm in my early/mid-sixties and I have absolutely no desire to just be friends with a woman of any age! If they want the pipe we can talk but other than that they can yammer to the other women!
I did some online dating for a bit; decided it wasn't for me, men consistently told me, they were looking for a woman who was financially independent; healthy, adventurous and available for world travel. Basically the men did not want to be needed for anything.
Discovery is fun? Good lord - no. If you roll a log over in the woods, you're far more likely to find worms, spiders and snakes than gold. It is the same with dating.
As a woman who is 60, honestly I’m not 100% in agreement with women needing a protector. I do agree with conversing with a man in a respectful way. I do very much think 🤔 that a woman looks for a best friend in a man. Relationships work when people hold similiar core values. It’s also important when either a woman or a man can honestly admire their partner for their core values. For instance my husband will not hesitate to stop and help someone. It’s an automatic reflex he has. It’s also a core value that he demoonstrates that I admire about him. He also has two sisters that he respects and that core value, that respect for women, is what actually attracted me to him in our courtship. We were friends who respected and admired each other equally before we became life partners and married. My advice, be yourself whether you are a man or woman. Look for friendship. Admire people for who they are and how their values lead them to be who they are. Matching core values and respecting a person for who they are worked for me, in essence these traits helped to bring equality to our relationship. That male female stereotype stuff is interesting, I’m just suggesting to dig deeper. Hope this is insight is helpful to somebody.
It took me 25 years to notice that my husband is so much more relaxed when he’s done with work and I just let him watch his car show and an episode of StarTrek! He works on computers all day long and it really tires his mind. So now I’m more patient, less worried about having the perfectly clean house and we’ve both stopped looking at the outside rather instead we are very in love with each other’s heart. Married 25 yrs. but best friends in the last 4yrs. We learned how to be mindful of each other which makes us cherish each other and we have become are our own treasure to each other. No ever told me that you get to be best friends and that falling in love is a process. Stay safe out there and practice patience and mindfulness with everyone you meet. God bless you all.
I love the idea of letting him be your hero. It is wonderful to know that I am capable of taking care of myself but that I can turn to him for shelter when life feels like it is too much. Really, all the advice boils down to entering any relationship as a gift rather than a burden and seeing the humanity in our partner so we can provide a space that is emotionally safe for them. I would add that at the same time, we ned to do our own work rather than relying on a man to make us happy and we need to make sure we have healthy boundaries to show him how to love us and provide safety for us. It is a two way street. And, we need to choose our partner carefully. Not everyone is a good match for us. It is better to wait for the right one if we are looking for something fulfilling long term.
I ended a bad marriage at 40 and single handedly brought up two kids. Now I am retired, financially comfortable and have great relationships with my adult children. Now I can do whatever I want and the last thing I need is to please an older man. I know some women cannot live without man ( an ex-colleague had said those exact words to me). That's definitely not me. I don't ever want to or need to please a man, any man, just so I can have their company. To me, that altitude makes a woman cheap.
As a mature man in his 50s, who was a very strong supporter of women’s rights and equality in his 20s and 30s, now really am attracted to feminine women. Unfortunately, because of the feminist movement, many women became like men in a woman’s body. A huge turn off. To all the women out there looking to date men, please, please, please become feminine once again. I love feminine women. They are just hard to find these days. Nothing sexier than a feminine woman.
Yes! I'm 52 yrs and very girly, feminine and effervescent, plus I look half my age and my body is still nice, men love it! I'm currently dating a man in his 60's and he's sooo appreciative of it, plus he's more of an alpha and leader, which is a big turn on! Haha
@@lisagrl89m.67 Well, let you be an example or role model for other women to follow. But, I’m not holding my breath. Unfortunately, you can’t singlehandedly change an entire generation or two. Sounds like you are a very rare gem indeed. Almost too good to be true! Are you seeking a long-term committed relationship, or just out to fulfill men’s desires with your body men so enjoy as you say?
@@iamHispen Yes, you are absolutely right. Thanks for pointing that out. I think what can happen sometimes is women start focusing on feminism too much and start to almost lose their femininity. But, not always. I realize I’m partly off topic here, but I wish to share my experience as a Canadian in Canada 🇨🇦: Rather than being a proponent of equal rights for women, I am a proponent of equal rights for ALL regardless of gender, socio-economic status, ethnicity, age, etc. It maybe hard to believe, but as a white male, specifically in my several careers, I have often been discriminated against by not being hired or promoted in favor of other candidates or colleagues who were visible minorities or female. It sounds hard to believe, I know. I never wanted to believe it myself. But, I experienced it many times. I lost many opportunities and suffered greatly because of it. All my friends and colleagues who belonged to visible minorities or who were female went on to have extremely successful careers. People don’t realize being a white male has been extra challenging. I’m a string believer in hiring and promoting the very best candidate regardless of their skin colour or gender, etc. (I know completely off topic from dating).
Men of all ages but particularly as we get much older, would dearly love to find a woman who takes responsibility for her own thoughts, feelings and behaviour. There is no one who makes you happy; one chooses such a response to a situation. It is the lack of accountability from women with which men have such difficulty understanding.
Yeah hope men find their thoughts more responsible on replying thoughts as i dont understand well whenever i ask questions why they keep on hanging you up without any explanations or reasons so that i may know when to give up or the contrary.
Does anyone talk to each other to try and understand where each one is coming from, or what each other want,, where’s the respect of getting to know each,, we all should accept our responsibilities and handle them accordingly, Am I wrong?
I saw that title and immediately thought “Who cares what men want? Haven’t we spent a lifetime worrying about what other people want?” Time to think about what we want for a change.
No we are not equal. There can't be two presidents two vice-presidents two CEOs two cfo's . My home and kingdom is my domain I need an assistant not a equal partner .
It’s better to ask a man if he WILL do something for you, not if he could, because of course he could do it , but using WILL sounds more like you are eliciting his agreement (willingness) and also gives him the right to decide whether he will comply, and possibly,even when, whereas could seems to imply you want it done now. This makes it more like a negotiation than a non negotiable request
I am 60 And Men of 50 and under find me attractive !!!We supposed to be with a life partner at our age....so dating is still in the mind its a young person arena...
I don’t think women have to do anything to boost up a man. They are perfectly capable of being “manly” themselves…whatever that means. Women are perfect ,men are perfect, We attract exactly what we need at that moment in time. We may not know what we want but we certainly know what we don’t want.I have 3 brothers and nobody makes me feel anything that I don’t already feel for myself. ❤️❤️❤️❤️🇨🇦👍
I’ve had terrible experience the dating sites. I have found that not only they want younger woman they make it a point that the women be FINANCIALLY STABLE. What do they want, a woman to make them feel great, be passionate and to be the ones to pay for the date as well?
I think they may be looking for financial stability as a sign that the woman is not after him because of his money. Too many women look for husbands based on how he can help her financially. it’s a bad scene when that happens.
Being critical and complaining are huge turn-offs. My issue is selfishness and being an empath myself, I find a lot of people are delusional. We don't see ourselves as we truly are. You are right, Lisa, we can't believe we are 60 or so. These men also don't shave! Why can't they groom themselves? Yet they want a supermodel. You are right, they seem to want a 30-something. Very true, most of us don't know what we want, women OR men.
You mentioned the word "hero" - but I think a more appropriate term would be "champion." I think that both men & women would like their partner to be their "champion" - the person who is in their corner, and both partners bring out the best in each other. Using the word 'Hero' is an idealized & idolized version of a person. In a relationship, having one partner be the hero assumes that the other person/partner is weaker... or 'needs' their partner (hero) to save or rescue them. That would not interest me at all. Having a relationship where both bring strengths to the table & where each adores & champions their partner is a wonderful thing!
From what I know they want to control and that can be done with a younger man or woman, an older woman can not be controlled they have been there and some have lost everything they owned because they gave and trusted too fast, so too men and woman best to stay alone and not lose everything you have work your whole life to get from someone who doesn't care and will replace you in a heartbeat! peace to everyone stay safe
Life itself is a risk. Even your first marriage is. Your Red Flags are many and do not leave any opportunities for a change. Desperation is adventurous but also dangerous. Honesty, Truth, Trust and Maturity may help if you are searching for companionship. Just be humane enough since everything is a risk. Take Care. Be Safe Always.
most likely if relationship is age spaced 15 years with man older woman not but 30 80 percent matched for compatibility no major addictions no mental problems as with sociopathology narcisism then divorce is probably never in the picture people entering into a fixerupper relationship r generally doomed for despair
Okay...But I have a few words for the men, considering what women do to attract them from the time they are in high school: 1) Improve your personal hygiene and grooming! Please. 2) . Think about manscaping. You don't want to focus on a lady's wrinkles, and we don't want to relax into a bush of white and grey hair starting from the neck down! 3) . Style yourself! How many older guys do you see wearing styles from 30 years ago, and poorly fitting clothes although their body has changed . Add on a fine, modern haircut and maybe a subtle bit of comb-in color. Make an effort! 4) Updated attitudes and tastes. Nothing at all wrong with memories of "our time". After all, who else but someone our age wants to listen to those? But show some movement! Here is a true story: One of the retired guys in our group was focusing on me, waving 2 tickets to a summer concert at me, and says "you won't believe these fabulous tickets I have".... He kept playing it up, and I'm thinking "oh, Cold Play, or Eddie Vedder, even Metallica, another current act or even a 50s supergroup." and getting interested. Finally, he gives it up - "Johnny Mathis!" I blurted out, i thought he was dead. Now, I loved Johnny Mathis 40 years ago. He's a great talent. There were many who sang our first love songs ... but my retired friend was stuck in this period. Then he went on to extoll the virtues of poor Karen Carpenter. Joan Rivers wrote an entire book about staying current, changing areas of your home instead of keeping yellowed photos on top of the piano, etc. There is a lot older men can do to get real and appeal to all kinds of women. Sorry this is so long, but I had to say it!
I guess it depends on the woman and the man...it's sounds like you and this guy would NOT be a good match so it's probably for the better that you didn't go out. On the other hand, people like other people who like the same things that they do and have the same experiences...I'm just about 60 and I l-o-v-e Johnny Mathis and dearly miss the one-of-a-kind smooth voice of Karen Carpenter. Doesn't mean that I don't like some modern music but I definitely love THAT type of music. So, with all due respect, it just sounds like you and this guy just weren't compatible, simple as that, instead of something being wrong with him or with you.
@@firstlast2034 I think that attitude will get you a free ticket to ride on the bus that takes you to the Cat Pet Shop, (special offer, buy one get ten free), and the Bitter and Twisted Knitting Club.
I enjoyed this. Relationships are delicate. My marriage is strong and still takes effort, awareness, respect and nurturing. My genuine love for my husband and the security and trust he enjoys in our marriage plus my strength to stand up for myself when needed- I feel are the reasons he married and loves me deeply. He does express his desire to receive my verbal appreciation. That’s Encouragement. Business wise hd’s highly successful- yet that vulnerability exists. We all have strengths and wounds. Love is my main asset. This topic made me step back- thank you 💕
You expressed that so well. I am in a relationship that is pretty good too. I also am enjoying this topic and conversation. It is really important to praise each other and that was the best tip I was reminded of here.
Congratulations on a successful marriage. I was married for 25 years but he then decided to cheat. It’s been 9 years since I got a divorce but this dating scene has not gone well.
These are not stupid games. This is how the gender chemistry works. You challenge a man, you get nothing. You request in a polite way you get more than what you even desire.
What is hard is when older people in their 50s, 60s know what they are looking for. If they have been in a divorce they don't want anyone like their spouse and then there are people who loved their deceased spouse and they are looking for that person. I was married to a controller who treated me like I didn't have the brains to do anything so he wanted to take over even selecting furniture and wallpaper without compromising and asking my opinion. So, I don't want a controller again. I want a kind, loving, giving man who is financially stable and he doesn't have to work. My ex husband couldn't keep a job because he was always being fired because of his temper. I had to work, not that it hurt me but, even though my ex is almost 70 he still can not retire. He keeps a job for a few months and moves on to the next job. I don't want to replace a man's deceased wife either. I hope I find someone who deserves me and I deserve him. It isn't easy. I don't want to go online anymore. I have lost interest after 13 years of online dating.
I am a 78 years-old man. Several years ago I realized what a mistake it is to consider women that I should consider one woman. To hear two well spoken experienced women talk about men is a eye opener for me. You are talking about about men when you should be encouraging women to think about A MAN. The very idea of treating men as a group is absurd. You also demean your sisters acting like you are all want and do the same thing. If A WOMAN wants to know what A MAN thinks and wants, talk and listen to him.
Find a companion that fits you. After my divorce I took on a roommate. A gay male 5 years younger. It’s been over 20 years now we have shared our lives and family. I’m grateful for his companionship and we have no expectations.
Im have the same feelings about women. I dont care much about them. But I still like them. Hey, maybe we can get together for a coffee and chat ?? Id like that. Im on the Maine coast.
OMG! That's is EXACTLY my issue. I see the men my age who respond to my online dating profile and I recoil in horror because they look like old men that look like my father or even grandfather. I can't imagine ever wanting to kiss any of them. Some of them might be willing to shave but I'm also repelled by facial hair.
Yes, whenever I see a man with a beard, I wonder what he really looks like under all that hair. I always imagine beards to have some nose mucus in them or drippings from his last meal. It just makes a man look unclean. There is a man who is really friendly and kind in my neighborhood but he has a grey beard almost down to his belt buckle. A person can't tell anything about him with all that mess on his face. He doesn't have the hair on his head cut either. He looks like Rip Van Winkle.
This sounds cruel......but why date a guy if you get serious that in 10 years they can be going into a nursing home? I am 54 have no desire to take care of anyone. I raised my kids took care of my mother. I want to be taken out to eat not cook for somebody so they could watch the football game spend a weekend watching your grandchildren. Men at that age have baggage. Too much for me. I rather be single.
Interesting conversation, a secure alpha male will not be toxic and if active will not do well with a pretty none active woman no matter the age. You have to know what you want, novelty carries a energy of excitement releases dopamine, but once the brain adjust to that emotion and you settle in. What will the relationship be? This dopamine release is the same problem In any new encounter, once the high is examined closer where is the substance of the connection no matter what age.
That's true, I was in the grocery recently and there was something I wanted and couldn't reach. There happened to be a lanky college type guy walking by and I asked him, on an impulse to get it for me. I usually don't ask for help and I felt badly about it. But when I saw how that guy acted I could see that he felt really good about reaching that for me. He looked really happy when he walked away. Idid it to a young guy in the parking lot of the Dollar store once. I was stuck with the empty wagon at my car and I can barely walk. I yelled out to this guy who was going in the store and asked him if he would take my wagon. His face broke out into a big grin and I thanked him profusely.. But I wouldn't recommend doing these things if you are not an old grandma type like me. Who knows a guy might say "do it yourself lady". Can't be sure these days!
Thanks for the chuckle! Who knows, maybe that grocery store guy is just what you need..not meaning that sarcastically either. You just never know what life holds for all of us out here. Stay safe and have some fun! 🥰
To me, you are better simply alone, rather than having a husband and still feeling alone and invisible. Ladies, if you are a lone and happy, enjoy it. At least you have an option whenever it may be to start a new relationship.
@@ritamariefromsc9356 I got a divorce from my ex wife the narc 23 years ago and I am doing just fine single, I am retired and own my own small business, life is good...
I’m 72 and don’t look my age, and most men I’ve attracted are at least 10 years my junior. I would rather be feminine, and work from their. I find if I treat a man as a man, and look for his help and advice in whatever I feel is acceptable to myself.
You should stop being all that needy. You don't need men. Stop wasting your time. You need love, you need a community. Work towards building your commune.
Seriously? Let's change how we ask men questions and be more feminine? Just listening to that woman made me understand why continual patriarchy rules. Ladies you do not have to sell men on how special they are and pump up their egos. If you are married be kind, funny and have friends to laugh and do things with. And if single...have a beautiful place to live that is all yours, make good friends that enjoy things you like to do and see whomever floats your boat at the moment. Be yourself and do not put on some phoney sales act to get a man. Have dinner, have laughs and get it on if you are attracted to them and do not worry about kissing some old man's saggy butt so he will like you...ridiculous! Do not waste your time with needy old men! Have fun in your older years and stop trying to please men! Be kind, funny and fun...if they want younger women who cares! This was the worst guest yet!
Age does not matter to me, I'm a male 71+ Aries, It's what can be made of a true relationship which takes two to make it happen, I used to hear many bad stories of young couples breaking up and never getting back together.The star signs of us do help to get that right person & when it happens you both just clik.
I totally agree with this last comment. Honestly, if a man needs to be talked to like that in order to feel like "a man", he has a serious problem of self-esteem, identity or god knows what and should get some professional help. I don´t think women should pay so much attention to the words we use , provided they are polite and respectful. When a man needs to feel like a hero (just as when a woman needs to feel like a princess), something has gone wrong in the ageing process.
Just last Sunday I went on a FIRST DATE to a local restaurant ( not the fanciest but not fast food either). I had my nails done, my hair washed and blown dry, makeup, perfume, a new top, etc. HE showed up with a pair of old shorts, work boots, knee-high sox and a shirt that looked like he pulled it out of a bottle. At dinner he picked his teeth, spittled food several times, ate like a pig to the point where people at other tables were looking and I was embarrased. When we left, he decided to walk me to my car. He proceeded to attempt to kiss me on the mouth (trying to get the toungue in there). I quickly turned my face and gave him a peck on the cheek (trying to be nice) thanked him for dinner and said my goodbyes in a sweet and friendly voice. I was parking my car at home (15 minutes) and he texted me that he was not happy "AT ALL" because he had spent almost $100 on the dinner and had expected an "ELEGANT FIRST KISS" and got "NOTHING"
Ellie, even if it's a first date, I always prefer a coffee date...I take some time to get to know someone first ...I'm thinking Is this person someone I would like to be friends with...a coffee date is open-ended, casual and you can really get to know someone
look at your passions, the hobbies that you each enjoy, make sure you have plenty you can share, you don't find a mate so you can each do your thing, you do it to have someone to do things with that will enhance the passions you already have - and it many cases you will learn new passions by trying something new your partner loves to do, make sure the foundations are similar, and don't be bossy ever, us older men do not need mothering
I don't even want a man in my life except as a friend but I found this interesting. Seems no matter how old I get (68) I have to play games to have a relationship. Nope! Yet I still attract in inappropriately young men on occasion. In grade school the girls were taught to never compete with boys if we could help it and always let the boy win and never, ever let them know you are smarter than they are. Even as a child I wondered why boys were so fragile! Still wondering. Seems manipulative. On the other hand I think we have forgotten how to appreciate the other person, male or female. Thanking someone honestly for their help or kindness goes a long way.
I've been around the block several times in my 81yrs and have concluded that all I want is a few friends and a woman of the night !! I don't need the games or the stress at my age !!
Unfortunately, what Lisa said comes natural with African women especially from my area in Nigeria but men tend to abuse this privileged handed to them by their partner. Women are now taking control and looking for a man who loves them and treat them with respect
No head games honesty, loyalty, fidality, Godliness, respect, consideration, appreciation etc. Things they should have done before the flower fell off.
My Grandmother told us growing up in the 1970/80s: "Girls, you must always allow a man, to be, a man. YOU be the woman." There were eight granddaughters, and we all thought at the Time, we needed to be strong women. She lived until she was almost 100 years, a wise lady.
Sorry, I am at my happiest without someone. My piece of mind is most important to me. I don’t want to be someone’s mommy or nurse, or cook or maid. I don’t see happily ever after. Never found it. It comes down to two people in a relationship only one can lead. The other has to be stuck following even if the person leading has no idea how to lead. I personally am burnt out on all of it.
I heard of how woman were taught growing up how to dress and behave to find a man and keep the act up on a daily basis after marriage to keep a husband. This talk reminds me of that. I am over 70, and am appalled to hear that today.
It's not an act - its embracing your feminine side. Theres also a time to embrace your masculine side. Men also have a feminine side and should be taught to use it, when appropriate.
Marsha Baker here--Alot of women stay in their masculinity all the time and forget how to be feminine. I was raised only around men, married 2 and had 3 boys and man it is hard for me to Find my feminity lol. My brother says I deal with men Like a man does not like a woman does. He's right too!
The more I watch and listen, the more it illustrates the differences between men and women and how little is known by either of you about men. How could you possibly know…….you aren’t one. You have a lot of men that tune in and just shake their heads or roll in in amazement of the real lack of knowledge on the male topic. It may sound I’m being critical, but I’m not. It’s more complicated than we imagine.
Looking at guys my age, 69, makes me cringe. You know they are probably a hot mess medically speaking. I wouldn't want to wake up next to any of them. My gf showed me my ex on a dating site, ALL LIES !! I'm sure he's not the only one full of baloney.
Dr. John Gray - the Men From Mars, Women From Venus guy, explains all this in more detail. He's got the role of hormone fluctuation in both genders just dialed in. It's not kissing up to men to "pump up their egos;" it's wise, because that's what makes them value you more and want to please you more. Every time I remember to do it - and this is ONLY with sincere praise and gratitude, not made-up stuff - I get more affection from the man I'm with.
This is a great program and I would love to be a part of this,I am 58 years old and will be 59 in a month and a half time. I just starting dating a 62 year old man and i am not sure what he is thinking because all he speaks about how much he got hurt in the past. I would love to know what I should do I don't believe he's ready for a real relationship.
Dont know if i am in a position to give advice. Somehow i think some straight talking to him is in order. Ask him nicely if he is looking for anything at all, someone to share experiences with, or just someone to offload negativity. I hv always been a straight talker, just say all that nicely, LOL! If he is looking for a trash bin, pls move on. 💖
The thing is, as people get older, they all come with baggage. Almost everyone has been hurt in a relationship at one time or other. It depends on whether he's done the work to recover from past hurts, to the extent possible. It also depends on how long ago that was and whether he seems to be carrying it with him regarding other women. It's better that he was the hurt one than the one who was unfaithful & left his spouse for some floozy, hurting his wife terribly. Admitting he was hurt is a good thing, as long as he doesn't dwell on it too much.
Trust ur gut instinct & move on. I dated a guy once & all he did was talk incessantly about his ex. Then I found out they broke up 10 yrs ago. He was still talking like it was yesterday. Wouldn't date a guy fresh out of a relationship either. They're screwed up & need time to sort things out. Women are more apt to sort things out before dating while men jump quickly into another relationship. Afraid of being alone.
@@calicokat4172 - …besides being afraid to be alone, many (not all) men are also looking for a cook/maid/social planner. Men often lack the support systems that women typically have over the decades.
As a woman in her mid 30s, wandered onto this channel casually planning for her future, I am RELIEVED by the top comments. Even at my age group we’ve been warned of older men/most men, wanting a nurse with a purse. Was worried for a sec here that y’all missed the memo 😅. For sure I definitely use the “Can you help me?” to get what I want from men but even with my comparatively less life experience I know the poor ROI of coddling men. They’re very transactional, mercenary creatures, we’ve been too naive.
Honestly, i do not want to take care of anyone but me now. I am over that stage of my life. I really don't want to be in the what do you want side of life.
Hello my dear ladies, good evening and compliment of the season. I am new in this community and I must say that I am enjoying and learning from all the conversations. I am 60 and a widow for 10 years now.
Lisa, this is traditional values but this is the 21st century. Values are different. I don't think there is a one size fit all when it comes to relationships. There are some men here who completely disagree. Mutual respect is important and where there is love/affection/attraction, there would not be a striving. I'm afraid Lisa, I disagree with these values for the 60 and me ladies
Life is a very beautiful words every man or women want to live in the world many person men or woman want to start a new life between fifty to seventy years and they try to find a new patner for spent a happy life it is right if they try to spent a happy life with a patner
Societal “norms” and all the rhetoric that goes with them can change all they want but basic male and female DNA does not change. Like Popeye said “ I yam what’s I yam” Gender confusion is disruptive to our species. Men and women are each uniquely equipped to contribute different things to the world. Media in my generation tried very hard to convince women they don’t need men so women took over some male roles. Now these women complain that men are unchivalrous and entitled. Can’t have It both ways.
I find it very telling a good amount of these people alone at older ages keep repeating. “I love it! Being single is great. I’m so happy. I’m so happy. I’m so happy.” I think it’s a massive cope.
I just turned 60; my husband of 27 years has cheated on me 3 times ( that I know for sure) no telling how many times he’s cheated that I didn’t know; I finally put my foot down and said ENOUGH IS ENOUGH!!! He’s pouting; blaming me for our problems! I’m done!! Ready for my freedom! I’m an RN, but have been out of the workforce for 10 years! Raised our son who is now 24! I’m ready for my freedom!!! I don’t feel I look 60; I’m told I look 50; but I don’t want a man who just wants another “mommy” to look after him!
As my widowed older sister says “if you can find me a 96 year old millionaire with 1 month to live I might consider remarrying”. Haha. She’s very happy living her single life.
At the age of 24 I dated a guy who was 52 but he broke my heart the guy was over controlling and everytime he never listened to me he was so mean old mens to me is no go zone to me
I agree with the taken away from men a lot women don't realize that a man needs to know that you feel that he is intelligent and capable. And if you're asking him to do something for you and then you'd say no that's wrong please do it this way then to him he's hearing he is incompetent
A hero is someone you can turn to someone you trust someone you respect man needs to feel needed otherwise they'll feel obsolete every time they do kind honorable courteous act for you thanks him show him how much you appreciate it either, a touch and thank you a hug and thank you a kiss on the cheek and to thank you a kiss on the mouth and thank you men love attention like this not just words be demonstrative ladies
The saddest thing here is reading all the comments down below it sounds like the majority of you have just given up on life altogether and even love and are actually very happy about being alone. So that's it? you just say i give up i don't want to be happy anymore? Love is absolutely 100% worth fighting for its amazing having someone there beside you to share everything and anything with even the smallest things make a huge difference they make life worth living don't give up. Yes men and women are different but that is the point! You two become one he makes up for what u need and u bring what he needs. Not everyone is the same and i know there bad people out there that have hurt you i know from experience believe me it's not easy but there some great people out there also don't give up and go find them and bring love and happiness back into your life.
Re the example of discussing a meal, maybe just pursue his feelings or ideas instead of jumping in to offer yours. He's telling you something about himself. It's an opportunity to learn more about him. Dig a little with genuine interest. You might learn something of value.
Clarice Aust Very sarcastic, Clarice. You’ve prob been burned often. No. Perhaps he’ll explain how he likes his steak and depending on his answer, or your follow-up question, you’ll find out where he had had such a great meal. Maybe it was Tokyo. This opens up the conversation for you to ask him questions about Tokyo. This is TOTALLY non-threatening. He may even ask you out on a second date.
Men are still and always will be that little boy. If you think of them as little boys, when you don't want to scar him, when you want to encourage him to be wonderful.., then you will be treating the man well.
A friend of mine is a psychiatrist, and he related some statistics compiled by the AMA years ago that said that 2nd marriages after age 35 had less than a 1% chance of lasting 5 years, and 3rd, 4th etc had exponentially lower chances of even lasting 1 year.
In my experience, as a woman of nearly 60, men aged over 60 who are looking for a partner want one who will settle down and live a quiet life with them, care for them and be looked after. Whereas most women over 60 who are looking for a partner want to spend our later lives gaining new experiences and want someone to share adventures with and break from the traditional norm of relationships because we've usually already spent many years in traditional, caring roles.
Very wise abs insightful comment!
You are so right Amanda !!
You are right, but luckily I found a 67 year old guy that is still looking for adventure and fun. We are planning a month long camping trip this summer, after he takes Kayak lessons so he can join me on some shorter kayaking trips. Lucky me. PS we enjoy our nights together too ;) I'm 65
Yes, Amanda, I agree with you, very insightful:)
@@DiraMcClintock Hi Dira, lucky you😀. How n where did you meet him? Through a mutual friend or what?
I can tell you from experience what most older men don't want. A friendship. I love being single, but would also enjoy a close friendship with a man. I've discovered that most aren't even open to ease into a relationship as friends. It's very puzzling to me. At 61, you'd think I'd have it all figured out. Good thing I'm content being on my own. 😊
@@mitchj8032 where r the right places?
Hello Lisa, how are you? Can we be friends.
Will you be on your own forever? Lol
I agree with you lisa
@@patrickdunn8918 Wow! I have other people in my life that help with tasks I can't do myself. A person isn't single for many years, without developing resources! And your comment is exactly why it's so hard to find genuine people that want to offer their friendship! Its sounds like you're afraid of being "used". So sad.
I was a nurse for 44years. Now retired. Looked after my family too, of course. Most older men I have met want a nurse or a purse, preferably both, to become their cook, cleaner, washerwoman ,housekeeper. Once a man learns I was a nurse their eyes light up !! I don't need anyone else to look after. Am enjoying MY TIME now.
After two cheating ex-wives, I think women want a paycheck and the freedom to pursue their next affair. That's from experience.
Those are two women out of millions. Many women I know want a monogamous, loyal, committed, safe relationship where one can be their true self, and the man can too, and work together as a team. We are supposed to achieve a higher level together and bring out the best in one another. Having the same values is key; otherwise, the relationship will go south. I am sorry that you were hurt. You did not deserve that. I will pray for your healing. You were with the wrong women. @@ufxpnv
@@ufxpnv It sounds like you are meeting (and marrying) the wrong women. Try finding a group that contains women that you can make friends with and talk to. Then make friends and just talk and hang out, paying your own way unless it is something you or the other person really wants to do and needs someone to go (in that case, I would pay for both). After getting to know some women as friends, I would be surprised if you did not find someone you enjoy and have easy conversations with... when that happens, offer a more date style outing and, if she agrees and keeps acting like your friend and seems to be attracted to you also (I assume you can tell by now) then you have a good base for a REAL committed relationship. You should also know the woman enough by then to know their ethics and values, too. Of course, I am no expert and have no idea if you did exactly that before. I just know I have never cheated on (or with a married man) any man, including a husband that wouldn't work, yelled all the time and expected me to make the money, raise our special needs daughter and take care of the house. I stayed much longer than I should have, but NEVER once considered cheating. I finally left, though. I am just saying, if you think it will happen, it probably will and if you treat it like a friendship at first, it won't matter and you can go your own way before becoming too involved. I will step off my probably ridiculous sounding soap box now. 🙄 I wish you the best in finding a good woman!
O please dont flatter yourself, your older than dirt!
EXACTLY
There is risk involved in a second marriage.( First ones as well, but with way less baggage!) There are more factors now: children, emotional scars, health problems, and financial issues. DO NOT REMARRY UNLESS YOU ARE SURE YOU ARE WILLING TO ACCEPT THE POSSIBLE CONSEQUENCES.
marriage being a 3 way contract is never a good deal but to bar assn and state extra rediculous after 50 as most women can t get pregnant and protecting children is off the table
This is so true for me I just can't give up control.
Hindsight is 20/20. If I would have known/felt what it would be like with steps, I would have run the other way.
@@angieharipershad588 Along with that, most relationships involve compromise. Unfortunatly, the word 'compromise' cannot be found in either my Oxford or Webster's dictionaries, LOL! A woman friend who is 61, was married twice, and says she never wants a man in her life again; because she would always have to be there for a husband, and she would not be able to enjoy days out, or talking on the phone with friends. Bein tied down can really limit one's independence. And, the dynamics of romantic relationships are often better between older woman yonger man partnerships, which is the reverse of what most men are looking for.
i agree
I just turned 62 and only date guys my age or a few years younger. Most men I meet want an equal partner, someone with a sense of humor and who is smart. Granted, I have a high powered job and earn a lot of money. All the men I have dated want someone intelligent, funny, emotional honest and available. If I acted like she suggested they would look at me as if I had 2 heads. Be yourself! You have to live you every day.
It makes sense you would date younger men. I recently retired at 59 and want to slow travel, a career woman has no time for any of that. Retired single women my age are rare. I’m too old for you as most retired men would be..
You are correct about what an older man wants. Sense of humor and smart that typically means they are nice to be around.
@@arnoldjohnson3317 - Wow, you sound like an emotionally (high EQ) secure, intelligent man! Yay you. Sadly, you are a minority in your age group.
but women biologically age 1 decade faster and adding that handicapp to a relationship just makes things much harder to b actually functional and lasting
@@chris532008 then why do many men look/act older at the same age? Most of them have more health problems when they are in the same age group. And then they die at a younger age than women on average.
@@annwrog many do those who live hard and fast i don t see them in the equation and at 62 u should not really encounter them i m talking bout the others
if you have to work hard in a relationship then something is wrong.
Over 60&it is my time.God,my son,my education,my dreams.Now living it 100 %.
Yay for you, Hazelita.
Not many women over 60 who have been married are interested in having a partner again. SO much freedom in life alone.
Yes. Dating is great. Marriage never again. Living together. Big big maybe someday. Probably not.
@@czarina7786 Sharing a bathroom is the kiss of death imho😄
Amen! Love! Love my freedom..freedom of not looking after another adult. Freedom of not checking in every hour 😅 How much money I make, spend..give😂😂😂 I get to train early in the morning or late at night..( not conditioned by another’s feeding schedule) my list just goes on and on😂😂😂😂❤
I had a great woman for 30 yrs god took her from me I been alone since havnt dated anybody so I'm still alone George most thenlaydirs I talk to think I'm rich all want moneneney
@@georgestone-rh7km It's okay to be alone and make life about you and only you.
I'm 62 look great for my age & here's the reality. The men my age who are falling apart would love to have me as their nurse, of course thats not what I'm looking for. The men in their 60s who have taken care of themselves as I have, who are financially secure as I am....they can get a girl 20 years younger than them....so.....finding a quality man who could easily get your daughter.....to choose to date you.....is challenging. I haven't given up but I think I'm about to break my lifetime rule & date younger men.
You are right but those women 20 yrs younger won’t stay around when the men age, don’t look as good, can’t preform, even with money, younger women want younger studs!!
I couldn’t agree more with you, Nicki Snyder..I’m 57, and I’m in good physical health, and men my age that are in good health & take care of themselves only want women 20 years younger! I refuse to be another caregiver-I made the mistake of getting involved with an abusive narcissist that was a lot older than me, and the last 3 years of his life I was a full-time (day & night) caregiver and was belittled and totally unappreciated. But who walks out on someone dying, especially someone you’ve invested several years in?? He’s been gone for a year now, and I’m still recovering from the abuse and not ready to get involved. But I do NOT want to get stuck in that trap ever again.
You go, girl!
The young girls don't want a dude who's diapers they have to change.
@@wyleecoyotee4252 that’s a good one! 👍
I have been a successful career women, am well educated and know what I like to be happy. I’m not about to change that for some insecure man who wants to be my hero. I honestly do not think what was discussed is reality in terms of what men want. Try intelligence, respect, shared interests, sense of humour, a women who takes care of herself in grooming and dressing, and companionship enjoyed in a variety of situations.
Carol Love Exactly 💕. Married 34yrs on the 25th of this month.
@@mindexpanding1 It’s my husbands reality and we have shared 25 years of marriage recognizing each other’s strengths that each of us sought in a partner.
Hey Carol
Are you currently in a relationship? If not this could be the reason but if you are comfortable on your own that's cool too.
@@kathykonkle1097 do you have Instagram?
Who says women weren't allowed to go to college??? My mother had a double major in college in the 1930s, worked a job after school, and surfed, raced cars on the salt flats! She had 4 brothers.
Yay!!! Good for her!!!
Your mother's story is not 'every woman's story.' The vast majority of women in those days did NOT go to college. A significant number of people didn't even finish high school back then! It's not like nowadays where just about anyone with a laptop can go to college.
@@thegrandmasabrina
Exactly, and she probably came from money because in those days there was no financial aid.
@@americanwoman445 In those days, college was cheap enough for a farmer's daughter. Better still, my grandmother didn't even have the option of going 200K in debt for a degree in Women's Studies, qualifying her for little more than Head Patriarchy Smasher at Starbucks. 😄
of course the college of today is the high school of yesteryear
I'm 60 now, and Perfectly happy being Single. I went out with a Widower for a brief time.
Never again Thankyou.
Sorry am 39 and want you so you can be happy as young
To carriered ..... I might know what you mean about dating widowers. I was friends with a widower for about nine months, and all he ever talked about was his wife ..... how wonderful she was, how talented she was, how gorgeous she was, how she made him see certain things, how she convinced him to go on trips, etc.. He burst into tears five times a day, even though his wife had died six years earlier! And when he wrote me emails, usually 15 pages long, telling me what wonderful things his wife had done, if I didn't comment enough and agree enough about how wonderful she was, he would get really angry, and I do mean really angry.
If you date a widower, or are even just friends with one, there is a good chance that you will ALWAYS be second in his life.
I would never date a widower.
" I went out with a Widower for a brief time. Never again" What about never-marrieds?
@@galaxy98765 My ex wife was all of those things too and I lost her to a divorce, WTH is the difference, she's gone too? I don't look at things that way, if she's gone, I will start over.
I would dump him in a heartbeat!
enjoy that lonely grave
I just want a companion . someone to go out with on occasion and maybe cook a meal every 3 months. Watch a good movie or go see one. You know, things like that.
Agree… I do have a male friend like this, we’ve been friends a Long time & its wonderful. Let the man know right away:
No pressure friendship!
You can go out with your lady friends and do that stuff with can't you?
@@porcupineparty8598 exactly. Why women need a man just to cook them a steak, go to movies…
Sorry, but men can’t be just “friends” forever. They start feeling used.
@@SUPERSTREETMUSTANG I'm in my early/mid-sixties and I have absolutely no desire to just be friends with a woman of any age! If they want the pipe we can talk but other than that they can yammer to the other women!
@@porcupineparty8598 The pipe! If you are still around to read this, that is so tacky! LOL
I did some online dating for a bit; decided it wasn't for me, men consistently told me, they were looking for a woman who was financially independent; healthy, adventurous and available for world travel. Basically the men did not want to be needed for anything.
Or they want a nurse with a purse!! Older women do not want to be a caregiver for an old man!!
@@dianaevans6725 and vice versa!
@@porcupineparty8598 not many women look for a male caregiver. They aren’t good at it, they go for younger women, they die before women do!!
What exactly would you expect or like a man to be needed for?
@@dianaevans6725 They do go for younger women! That I can agree with for sure! It's a basic biology thing.
Let's just not OVER TALK the situation. Men & women are still attracted to each other. Fun part is discovery!
Discovery is fun? Good lord - no. If you roll a log over in the woods, you're far more likely to find worms, spiders and snakes than gold. It is the same with dating.
Hello 👋 dear, how are you doing, u look familiar
But women are looking for Elvis at this age! LOL
As a woman who is 60, honestly I’m not 100% in agreement with women needing a protector. I do agree with conversing with a man in a respectful way. I do very much think 🤔 that a woman looks for a best friend in a man. Relationships work when people hold similiar core values. It’s also important when either a woman or a man can honestly admire their partner for their core values. For instance my husband will not hesitate to stop and help someone. It’s an automatic reflex he has. It’s also a core value that he demoonstrates that I admire about him. He also has two sisters that he respects and that core value, that respect for women, is what actually attracted me to him in our courtship. We were friends who respected and admired each other equally before we became life partners and married. My advice, be yourself whether you are a man or woman. Look for friendship. Admire people for who they are and how their values lead them to be who they are. Matching core values and respecting a person for who they are worked for me, in essence these traits helped to bring equality to our relationship. That male female stereotype stuff is interesting, I’m just suggesting to dig deeper. Hope this is insight is helpful to somebody.
It took me 25 years to notice that my husband is so much more relaxed when he’s done with work and I just let him watch his car show and an episode of StarTrek! He works on computers all day long and it really tires his mind. So now I’m more patient, less worried about having the perfectly clean house and we’ve both stopped looking at the outside rather instead we are very in love with each other’s heart. Married 25 yrs. but best friends in the last 4yrs. We learned how to be mindful of each other which makes us cherish each other and we have become are our own treasure to each other. No ever told me that you get to be best friends and that falling in love is a process. Stay safe out there and practice patience and mindfulness with everyone you meet. God bless you all.
We love each other today more than when we first got married.
You LET HIM. What are you, his mother?
So, after your husband returned from work, you started instantly to command him around? Don't you have your own work /friends/hobbies?
Hello beautiful friend how are you doing today, it's a pleasure meeting you .
You are so lucky. It was not meant to be for me.
I love the idea of letting him be your hero. It is wonderful to know that I am capable of taking care of myself but that I can turn to him for shelter when life feels like it is too much.
Really, all the advice boils down to entering any relationship as a gift rather than a burden and seeing the humanity in our partner so we can provide a space that is emotionally safe for them.
I would add that at the same time, we ned to do our own work rather than relying on a man to make us happy and we need to make sure we have healthy boundaries to show him how to love us and provide safety for us. It is a two way street.
And, we need to choose our partner carefully. Not everyone is a good match for us. It is better to wait for the right one if we are looking for something fulfilling long term.
Nice
I ended a bad marriage at 40 and single handedly brought up two kids. Now I am retired, financially comfortable and have great relationships with my adult children. Now I can do whatever I want and the last thing I need is to please an older man. I know some women cannot live without man ( an ex-colleague had said those exact words to me). That's definitely not me. I don't ever want to or need to please a man, any man, just so I can have their company. To me, that altitude makes a woman cheap.
Age is no matter, important respect and good behavior, attitude and true feeling
Exactly. Only details change but true character is diamond which is not even scratched with time.
thumbs up!
Mukaaram Ali yes. I totally agree!
Age matters.
Right on
I prefer being alone in my 60
Being independent and having freedom again is such a big advantage! Older men wants to be taken care of !
Sad isn't it? 😕
My mom's SO saved her life.
Living alone has its hazards.
@@r.j.dunnill1465 ???
Or perhaps it's nice to be able to look after one another.
Perhaps the best advice.....be the change you want to see and attract, and don't settle for bad energy relationships.
Best advice on here.
Yup, at our age we should be able to spot those right away
Yes, don't just settle for PIPE.
Hello
As a mature man in his 50s, who was a very strong supporter of women’s rights and equality in his 20s and 30s, now really am attracted to feminine women. Unfortunately, because of the feminist movement, many women became like men in a woman’s body. A huge turn off. To all the women out there looking to date men, please, please, please become feminine once again. I love feminine women. They are just hard to find these days. Nothing sexier than a feminine woman.
I agree, traditional is much better
Yes! I'm 52 yrs and very girly, feminine and effervescent, plus I look half my age and my body is still nice, men love it! I'm currently dating a man in his 60's and he's sooo appreciative of it, plus he's more of an alpha and leader, which is a big turn on! Haha
@@lisagrl89m.67 Well, let you be an example or role model for other women to follow. But, I’m not holding my breath. Unfortunately, you can’t singlehandedly change an entire generation or two. Sounds like you are a very rare gem indeed. Almost too good to be true! Are you seeking a long-term committed relationship, or just out to fulfill men’s desires with your body men so enjoy as you say?
Femininity and feminism are not necessarily opposite.
@@iamHispen Yes, you are absolutely right. Thanks for pointing that out. I think what can happen sometimes is women start focusing on feminism too much and start to almost lose their femininity. But, not always. I realize I’m partly off topic here, but I wish to share my experience as a Canadian in Canada 🇨🇦: Rather than being a proponent of equal rights for women, I am a proponent of equal rights for ALL regardless of gender, socio-economic status, ethnicity, age, etc. It maybe hard to believe, but as a white male, specifically in my several careers, I have often been discriminated against by not being hired or promoted in favor of other candidates or colleagues who were visible minorities or female. It sounds hard to believe, I know. I never wanted to believe it myself. But, I experienced it many times. I lost many opportunities and suffered greatly because of it. All my friends and colleagues who belonged to visible minorities or who were female went on to have extremely successful careers. People don’t realize being a white male has been extra challenging. I’m a string believer in hiring and promoting the very best candidate regardless of their skin colour or gender, etc. (I know completely off topic from dating).
Men of all ages but particularly as we get much older, would dearly love to find a woman who takes responsibility for her own thoughts, feelings and behaviour. There is no one who makes you happy; one chooses such a response to a situation. It is the lack of accountability from women with which men have such difficulty understanding.
Yeah hope men find their thoughts more responsible on replying thoughts as i dont understand well whenever i ask questions why they keep on hanging you up without any explanations or reasons so that i may know when to give up or the contrary.
Truthful Communication and Trust is a must!!
Does anyone talk to each other to try and understand where each one is coming from, or what each other want,, where’s the respect of getting to know each,, we all should accept our responsibilities and handle them accordingly,
Am I wrong?
@Mark Ford....I like your comment on men, however never found one who thought like you.
Looking to please a good a women in all general & social activies that please her
I saw that title and immediately thought “Who cares what men want? Haven’t we spent a lifetime worrying about what other people want?” Time to think about what we want for a change.
Wow nice to hear that from you
So how are you doing today ?
Do you really think so
Yes tell me what you want we are equal are we not
Oh you hit the nail on the head!
No we are not equal. There can't be two presidents two vice-presidents two CEOs two cfo's . My home and kingdom is my domain I need an assistant not a equal partner .
It’s better to ask a man if he WILL do something for you, not if he could, because of course he could do it , but using WILL sounds more like you are eliciting his agreement (willingness) and also gives him the right to decide whether he will comply, and possibly,even when, whereas could seems to imply you want it done now. This makes it more like a negotiation than a non negotiable request
Try using “would you...” works pretty good for me😊
Be honest, caring, and supportive. Great information. Communication,trust and intimacy are key to being happy. Thank you for sharing.
So true. I've been married to my "room mate" for many years and have had neither.
@@ritamariefromsc9356 Hello Rita
How are you?
Hey Kathleen
@@ritamariefromsc9356 I know what you say
I am 60 And Men of 50 and under find me attractive !!!We supposed to be with a life partner at our age....so dating is still in the mind its a young person arena...
Everyone deserve a better partner in respective of the age
Hello there how are you doing today and hope all is well with you in this time of covid.
60 is still YOUNG
@@mariskatjon911590 is the new 60 .
I don’t think women have to do anything to boost up a man. They are perfectly capable of being “manly” themselves…whatever that means. Women are perfect ,men are perfect, We attract exactly what we need at that moment in time. We may not know what we want but we certainly know what we don’t want.I have 3 brothers and nobody makes me feel anything that I don’t already feel for myself. ❤️❤️❤️❤️🇨🇦👍
I’ve had terrible experience the dating sites. I have found that not only they want younger woman they make it a point that the women be FINANCIALLY STABLE. What do they want, a woman to make them feel great, be passionate and to be the ones to pay for the date as well?
Hello Adnerys, How are you doing?
I think they may be looking for financial stability as a sign that the woman is not after him because of his money. Too many women look for husbands based on how he can help her financially. it’s a bad scene when that happens.
Being critical and complaining are huge turn-offs. My issue is selfishness and being an empath myself, I find a lot of people are delusional. We don't see ourselves as we truly are. You are right, Lisa, we can't believe we are 60 or so. These men also don't shave! Why can't they groom themselves? Yet they want a supermodel. You are right, they seem to want a 30-something. Very true, most of us don't know what we want, women OR men.
Hello Lisa how are you doing?
The man next door to me takes his morning walk with his hair standing on end, like he just crawled out of bed. Its so funny!
Hello 👋 dear, how are you doing, u look familiar
@Dr. Christopher Johnson Hello! I’m from Clearwater, Florida. Have a lovely week! ❤️💖💕
Hello Lisa 😊
You mentioned the word "hero" - but I think a more appropriate term would be "champion." I think that both men & women would like their partner to be their "champion" - the person who is in their corner, and both partners bring out the best in each other. Using the word 'Hero' is an idealized & idolized version of a person. In a relationship, having one partner be the hero assumes that the other person/partner is weaker... or 'needs' their partner (hero) to save or rescue them. That would not interest me at all. Having a relationship where both bring strengths to the table & where each adores & champions their partner is a wonderful thing!
Hello
From what I know they want to control and that can be done with a younger man or woman, an older woman can not be controlled they have been there and some have lost everything they owned because they gave and trusted too fast, so too men and woman best to stay alone and not lose everything you have work your whole life to get from someone who doesn't care and will replace you in a heartbeat! peace to everyone stay safe
So true...
Especially now a days, so many scammers coming into our country.
So so true 💯
Just do not combine or marry! Stay separate! It will keep things alive!!
@@dianaevans6725 Agree!
Life itself is a risk. Even your first marriage is. Your Red Flags are many and do not leave any opportunities for a change. Desperation is adventurous but also dangerous. Honesty, Truth, Trust and Maturity may help if you are searching for companionship. Just be humane enough since everything is a risk.
Take Care. Be Safe Always.
Good advice! 👍
most likely if relationship is age spaced 15 years with man older woman not but 30 80 percent matched for compatibility no major addictions no mental problems as with sociopathology narcisism then divorce is probably never in the picture people entering into a fixerupper relationship r generally doomed for despair
Okay...But I have a few words for the men, considering what women do to attract them from the time they are in high school:
1) Improve your personal hygiene and grooming! Please.
2) . Think about manscaping. You don't want to focus on a lady's wrinkles, and we don't want to relax into a bush of white and grey hair starting from the neck down!
3) . Style yourself! How many older guys do you see wearing styles from 30 years ago, and poorly fitting clothes although their body has changed . Add on a fine, modern haircut and maybe a subtle bit of comb-in color. Make an effort!
4) Updated attitudes and tastes. Nothing at all wrong with memories of "our time". After all, who else but someone our age wants to listen to those? But show some movement!
Here is a true story: One of the retired guys in our group was focusing on me, waving 2 tickets to a summer concert at me, and says "you won't believe these fabulous tickets I have".... He kept playing it up, and I'm thinking "oh, Cold Play, or Eddie Vedder, even Metallica, another current act or even a 50s supergroup." and getting interested. Finally, he gives it up - "Johnny Mathis!" I blurted out, i thought he was dead. Now, I loved Johnny Mathis 40 years ago. He's a great talent. There were many who sang our first love songs ... but my retired friend was stuck in this period. Then he went on to extoll the virtues of poor Karen Carpenter.
Joan Rivers wrote an entire book about staying current, changing areas of your home instead of keeping yellowed photos on top of the piano, etc.
There is a lot older men can do to get real and appeal to all kinds of women. Sorry this is so long, but I had to say it!
Francine, Good advice, thanks!
I guess it depends on the woman and the man...it's sounds like you and this guy would NOT be a good match so it's probably for the better that you didn't go out. On the other hand, people like other people who like the same things that they do and have the same experiences...I'm just about 60 and I l-o-v-e Johnny Mathis and dearly miss the one-of-a-kind smooth voice of Karen Carpenter. Doesn't mean that I don't like some modern music but I definitely love THAT type of music. So, with all due respect, it just sounds like you and this guy just weren't compatible, simple as that, instead of something being wrong with him or with you.
I agree with everything!
True.
Metallica is timeless 😉
I’m 66 and tired of pandering to what men want. At this time of my life I’m focusing on what I want.
I think that is healthy!
@@firstlast2034 I think that attitude will get you a free ticket to ride on the bus that takes you to the Cat Pet Shop, (special offer, buy one get ten free), and the Bitter and Twisted Knitting Club.
Wow, most women start that at about 20 years old.
@@bud5084LOL! Keep telling yourself that.
We can encourage but it also needs to be returned
Hello Sandra 👋
You’re right smile 😊
Where are you from if i may ask?
I enjoyed this. Relationships are delicate. My marriage is strong and still takes effort, awareness, respect and nurturing.
My genuine love for my husband and the security and trust he enjoys in our marriage plus my strength to stand up for myself when needed- I feel are the reasons he married and loves me deeply.
He does express his desire to receive my verbal appreciation. That’s Encouragement.
Business wise hd’s highly successful- yet that vulnerability exists.
We all have strengths and wounds.
Love is my main asset.
This topic made me step back- thank you 💕
Being in love whatever the age st
I said being in love at any age is just wonderful it the same euphoric experience at 15 or 70. Amen.
You expressed that so well. I am in a relationship that is pretty good too.
I also am enjoying this topic and conversation. It is really important to praise each other and that was the best tip I was reminded of here.
Hey Susan
Congratulations on a successful marriage. I was married for 25 years but he then decided to cheat. It’s been 9 years since I got a divorce but this dating scene has not gone well.
I'm over playing stupid games with men. I want a grown up, equal.
How old are you?
These are not stupid games. This is how the gender chemistry works. You challenge a man, you get nothing. You request in a polite way you get more than what you even desire.
What is hard is when older people in their 50s, 60s know what they are looking for. If they have been in a divorce they don't want anyone like their spouse and then there are people who loved their deceased spouse and they are looking for that person. I was married to a controller who treated me like I didn't have the brains to do anything so he wanted to take over even selecting furniture and wallpaper without compromising and asking my opinion. So, I don't want a controller again. I want a kind, loving, giving man who is financially stable and he doesn't have to work. My ex husband couldn't keep a job because he was always being fired because of his temper. I had to work, not that it hurt me but, even though my ex is almost 70 he still can not retire. He keeps a job for a few months and moves on to the next job. I don't want to replace a man's deceased wife either. I hope I find someone who deserves me and I deserve him. It isn't easy. I don't want to go online anymore. I have lost interest after 13 years of online dating.
I am a 78 years-old man. Several years ago I realized what a mistake it is to consider women that I should consider one woman. To hear two well spoken experienced women talk about men is a eye opener for me. You are talking about about men when you should be encouraging women to think about A MAN. The very idea of treating men as a group is absurd. You also demean your sisters acting like you are all want and do the same thing. If A WOMAN wants to know what A MAN thinks and wants, talk and listen to him.
Find a companion that fits you. After my divorce I took on a roommate. A gay male 5 years younger. It’s been over 20 years now we have shared our lives and family. I’m grateful for his companionship and we have no expectations.
What I’ve found is that the older I get, the less I give a rat’s behind what men want.
Im have the same feelings about women. I dont care much about them. But I still like them.
Hey, maybe we can get together for a coffee and chat ?? Id like that. Im on the Maine coast.
Amen to this.
Who cares what they want ? We’ve been catering to what they want for decades.
Yesssssss, I agree with you 💯!!!!!!!!
bitter much?
Ditto
OMG! That's is EXACTLY my issue. I see the men my age who respond to my online dating profile and I recoil in horror because they look like old men that look like my father or even grandfather. I can't imagine ever wanting to kiss any of them. Some of them might be willing to shave but I'm also repelled by facial hair.
Hello 👋 dear, how are you doing, u look familiar
Yes, whenever I see a man with a beard, I wonder what he really looks like under all that hair. I always imagine beards to have some nose mucus in them or drippings from his last meal. It just makes a man look unclean. There is a man who is really friendly and kind in my neighborhood but he has a grey beard almost down to his belt buckle. A person can't tell anything about him with all that mess on his face. He doesn't have the hair on his head cut either. He looks like Rip Van Winkle.
😂🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣you so funny, I cut my beards most times I don’t enjoy keeping them
🙄 I’d like to see Kathy’s mug shot.
And I'm not interested in the grandma look, and a ton of baggage
This sounds cruel......but why date a guy if you get serious that in 10 years they can be going into a nursing home? I am 54 have no desire to take care of anyone. I raised my kids took care of my mother. I want to be taken out to eat not cook for somebody so they could watch the football game spend a weekend watching your grandchildren. Men at that age have baggage. Too much for me. I rather be single.
Couldn’t agree more!
Men feel the same way! Men are tired of being used!
you most likely will.
@@danhorton1877 😂
Totally agree. Don't want to be some dude's caregiver. Not interested in long term. He would have to be damn special, which doesn't exist
The Good relationship between man and woman if u have respect one another, honest, both of you and you have love together,
👍
Honesty is the one good foundation of good relationship
@@vemindaalipio7351 indeed nothing greater than that
Thank you for explaining how I think, If your goal is to be alone your well on your way.
yyyyes
Be yourself!
Hello 👋
Happy New Year Christine i hope this year bring joy and happiness to all Americans and all over the world 🌎
Interesting conversation, a secure alpha male will not be toxic and if active will not do well with a pretty none active woman no matter the age. You have to know what you want, novelty carries a energy of excitement releases dopamine, but once the brain adjust to that emotion and you settle in. What will the relationship be? This dopamine release is the same problem In any new encounter, once the high is examined closer where is the substance of the connection no matter what age.
That's true, I was in the grocery recently and there was something I wanted and couldn't reach. There happened to be a lanky college type guy walking by and I asked him, on an impulse to get it for me. I usually don't ask for help and I felt badly about it. But when I saw how that guy acted I could see that he felt really good about reaching that for me. He looked really happy when he walked away. Idid it to a young guy in the parking lot of the Dollar store once. I was stuck with the empty wagon at my car and I can barely walk. I yelled out to this guy who was going in the store and asked him if he would take my wagon. His face broke out into a big grin and I thanked him profusely.. But I wouldn't recommend doing these things if you are not an old grandma type like me. Who knows a guy might say "do it yourself lady". Can't be sure these days!
Thanks for the chuckle! Who knows, maybe that grocery store guy is just what you need..not meaning that sarcastically either. You just never know what life holds for all of us out here. Stay safe and have some fun! 🥰
@@thisisme3238 - OMG! I'm on my last legs. Romance is the last thing I need. Thanks for the thought though.
@@grandmajane2593 Your welcome! 🤗
Hello
I think most people feel good when they help others.
Being alone at 67 is just fine, don't need anyone in my life, just my freedom and Jesus...
To me, you are better simply alone, rather than having a husband and still feeling alone and invisible. Ladies, if you are a lone and happy, enjoy it. At least you have an option whenever it may be to start a new relationship.
@@ritamariefromsc9356 I got a divorce from my ex wife the narc 23 years ago and I am doing just fine single, I am retired and own my own small business, life is good...
@@Tafiquhusainjannn no, what you like is visa and money. Shameless liar.
Why are you here?
Jesus? You sound like my mother lol 😂
I’m 72 and don’t look my age, and most men I’ve attracted are at least 10 years my junior. I would rather be feminine, and work from their. I find if I treat a man as a man, and look for his help and advice in whatever I feel is acceptable to myself.
You should stop being all that needy. You don't need men. Stop wasting your time. You need love, you need a community. Work towards building your commune.
Hello 👋 dear, how are you doing, u look familiar
62 is a good age for younger for you to have fun with
Seriously? Let's change how we ask men questions and be more feminine? Just listening to that woman made me understand why continual patriarchy rules. Ladies you do not have to sell men on how special they are and pump up their egos. If you are married be kind, funny and have friends to laugh and do things with. And if single...have a beautiful place to live that is all yours, make good friends that enjoy things you like to do and see whomever floats your boat at the moment. Be yourself and do not put on some phoney sales act to get a man. Have dinner, have laughs and get it on if you are attracted to them and do not worry about kissing some old man's saggy butt so he will like you...ridiculous! Do not waste your time with needy old men! Have fun in your older years and stop trying to please men! Be kind, funny and fun...if they want younger women who cares! This was the worst guest yet!
Toootally agree!
Age does not matter to me, I'm a male 71+ Aries, It's what can be made of a true relationship which takes two to make it happen, I used to hear many bad stories of young couples breaking up and never getting back together.The star signs of us do help to get that right person & when it happens you both just clik.
"... whomever floats your boat at the moment... "
🤮
@@jimmyyounger618 I thought it was very amusing myself!! 😁😂
I totally agree with this last comment. Honestly, if a man needs to be talked to like that in order to feel like "a man", he has a serious problem of self-esteem, identity or god knows what and should get some professional help. I don´t think women should pay so much attention to the words we use , provided they are polite and respectful. When a man needs to feel like a hero (just as when a woman needs to feel like a princess), something has gone wrong in the ageing process.
Just last Sunday I went on a FIRST DATE to a local restaurant ( not the fanciest but not fast food either). I had my nails done, my hair washed and blown dry, makeup, perfume, a new top, etc. HE showed up with a pair of old shorts, work boots, knee-high sox and a shirt that looked like he pulled it out of a bottle. At dinner he picked his teeth, spittled food several times, ate like a pig to the point where people at other tables were looking and I was embarrased. When we left, he decided to walk me to my car. He proceeded to attempt to kiss me on the mouth (trying to get the toungue in there). I quickly turned my face and gave him a peck on the cheek (trying to be nice) thanked him for dinner and said my goodbyes in a sweet and friendly voice. I was parking my car at home (15 minutes) and he texted me that he was not happy "AT ALL" because he had spent almost $100 on the dinner and had expected an "ELEGANT FIRST KISS" and got "NOTHING"
Wow! I'm so sorry you had to endure that!
He deserved what he got, love
Ellie, even if it's a first date, I always prefer a coffee date...I take some time to get to know someone first ...I'm thinking Is this person someone I would like to be friends with...a coffee date is open-ended, casual and you can really get to know someone
I would have written him out a check right away and told him on the text to come and pick it up.
WOW, whatever possessed u to go out w/ him in the first place.
look at your passions, the hobbies that you each enjoy, make sure you have plenty you can share, you don't find a mate so you can each do your thing, you do it to have someone to do things with that will enhance the passions you already have - and it many cases you will learn new passions by trying something new your partner loves to do, make sure the foundations are similar, and don't be bossy ever, us older men do not need mothering
Hey how are you
I don't even want a man in my life except as a friend but I found this interesting. Seems no matter how old I get (68) I have to play games to have a relationship. Nope! Yet I still attract in inappropriately young men on occasion.
In grade school the girls were taught to never compete with boys if we could help it and always let the boy win and never, ever let them know you are smarter than they are. Even as a child I wondered why boys were so fragile! Still wondering. Seems manipulative. On the other hand I think we have forgotten how to appreciate the other person, male or female. Thanking someone honestly for their help or kindness goes a long way.
Why would a woman want a man for a friend? Why not just have women as friends?
@@porcupineparty8598 I am sure in this world no woman or man wants your "friendship"!
@@silviabrodkorb3300 You would be wrong and you didn't answer my question!
So tired of men and their fragile egos.
@@porcupineparty8598 Long-time marrieds are friends. Best friends. IMO.
I've been around the block several times in my 81yrs and have concluded that all I want is a few friends and a woman of the night !! I don't need the games or the stress at my age !!
Unfortunately, what Lisa said comes natural with African women especially from my area in Nigeria but men tend to abuse this privileged handed to them by their partner. Women are now taking control and looking for a man who loves them and treat them with respect
Yes, men lose interest quickly! They need variety!
No head games honesty, loyalty, fidality, Godliness, respect, consideration, appreciation etc. Things they should have done before the flower fell off.
My Grandmother told us growing up in the 1970/80s: "Girls, you must always allow a man, to be, a man. YOU be the woman." There were eight granddaughters, and we all thought at the Time, we needed to be strong women. She lived until she was almost 100 years, a wise lady.
Wow I'm 51 - this coach knows her stuff - her first answer to what do men want- is SPOT ON.
Shouldn’t you get an over 60 man to tell us?
Hello 👋 dear, how are you doing, u look familiar
That’s normal, men should make you feel protected, it’s what it is.
Hello....... how are you doing today?
Sorry, I am at my happiest without someone. My piece of mind is most important to me. I don’t want to be someone’s mommy or nurse, or cook or maid. I don’t see happily ever after. Never found it. It comes down to two people in a relationship only one can lead. The other has to be stuck following even if the person leading has no idea how to lead. I personally am burnt out on all of it.
You are speaking for yourself! If I thought a woman really felt like you just stated, I also would walk away!
I heard of how woman were taught growing up how to dress and behave to find a man and keep the act up on a daily basis after marriage to keep a husband. This talk reminds me of that. I am over 70, and am appalled to hear that today.
I agree. I fel tlike we were being told to protect their fragility.
It's not an act - its embracing your feminine side. Theres also a time to embrace your masculine side. Men also have a feminine side and should be taught to use it, when appropriate.
This was a very good conversation - love to see a 2022 update on it. Thanks.
or 2027
............to be left in peace to do what the hell they like without being screwed over
Are there men who only want a decent, honest, female traveling buddy?
Wah, call the wah-mbulance
Marsha Baker here--Alot of women stay in their masculinity all the time and forget how to be feminine. I was raised only around men, married 2 and had 3 boys and man it is hard for me to Find my feminity lol. My brother says I deal with men Like a man does not like a woman does. He's right too!
Older men want younger women to make them feel young and stud-like. They look at older women and it makes them feel older. They just don’t get it.
The more I watch and listen, the more it illustrates the differences between men and women and how little is known by either of you about men. How could you possibly know…….you aren’t one. You have a lot of men that tune in and just shake their heads or roll in in amazement of the real lack of knowledge on the male topic. It may sound I’m being critical, but I’m not. It’s more complicated than we imagine.
Excellent comment from a female
Looking at guys my age, 69, makes me cringe. You know they are probably a hot mess medically speaking. I wouldn't want to wake up next to any of them. My gf showed me my ex on a dating site, ALL LIES !! I'm sure he's not the only one full of baloney.
Ex blew us up with catfished photos. Creepy.
Ha,ha same here,looking at women your age makes me feel the same way to put it mildly!
A woman wants to be cherished and a man wants to be useful.
Very true, are you single
@@pattizapf4135 Yes I am.
My ex. didn't want to be useful. He would like it if someone admired his diamond rings, but he would not be interested in doing something for a women.
@@grandmajane2593 And that's why you call him your ex.
@@mimi1girl2dempsey3 - No, its a long story.
This is a horrifying sign of the times. Hoping things have changed in the 7 years since this video was published
Dr. John Gray - the Men From Mars, Women From Venus guy, explains all this in more detail. He's got the role of hormone fluctuation in both genders just dialed in. It's not kissing up to men to "pump up their egos;" it's wise, because that's what makes them value you more and want to please you more. Every time I remember to do it - and this is ONLY with sincere praise and gratitude, not made-up stuff - I get more affection from the man I'm with.
Hello
Wasn't he divorced like 5 times?
This is a great program and I would love to be a part of this,I am 58 years old and will be 59 in a month and a half time.
I just starting dating a 62 year old man and i am not sure what he is thinking because all he speaks about how much he got hurt in the past. I would love to know what I should do I don't believe he's ready for a real relationship.
Dont know if i am in a position to give advice. Somehow i think some straight talking to him is in order. Ask him nicely if he is looking for anything at all, someone to share experiences with, or just someone to offload negativity.
I hv always been a straight talker, just say all that nicely, LOL! If he is looking for a trash bin, pls move on. 💖
The thing is, as people get older, they all come with baggage. Almost everyone has been hurt in a relationship at one time or other. It depends on whether he's done the work to recover from past hurts, to the extent possible. It also depends on how long ago that was and whether he seems to be carrying it with him regarding other women. It's better that he was the hurt one than the one who was unfaithful & left his spouse for some floozy, hurting his wife terribly. Admitting he was hurt is a good thing, as long as he doesn't dwell on it too much.
Trust ur gut instinct & move on. I dated a guy once & all he did was talk incessantly about his ex. Then I found out they broke up 10 yrs ago. He was still talking like it was yesterday. Wouldn't date a guy fresh out of a relationship either. They're screwed up & need time to sort things out. Women are more apt to sort things out before dating while men jump quickly into another relationship. Afraid of being alone.
@@calicokat4172 - …besides being afraid to be alone, many (not all) men are also looking for a cook/maid/social planner. Men often lack the support systems that women typically have over the decades.
As a woman in her mid 30s, wandered onto this channel casually planning for her future, I am RELIEVED by the top comments. Even at my age group we’ve been warned of older men/most men, wanting a nurse with a purse. Was worried for a sec here that y’all missed the memo 😅. For sure I definitely use the “Can you help me?” to get what I want from men but even with my comparatively less life experience I know the poor ROI of coddling men. They’re very transactional, mercenary creatures, we’ve been too naive.
Honestly, i do not want to take care of anyone but me now. I am over that stage of my life. I really don't want to be in the what do you want side of life.
Hello Betty
Hello my dear ladies, good evening and compliment of the season. I am new in this community and I must say that I am enjoying and learning from all the conversations. I am 60 and a widow for 10 years now.
Register for what? You are welcome here? I’m
Lisa, this is traditional values but this is the 21st century. Values are different. I don't think there is a one size fit all when it comes to relationships. There are some men here who completely disagree. Mutual respect is important and where there is love/affection/attraction, there would not be a striving. I'm afraid Lisa, I disagree with these values for the 60 and me ladies
Life is a very beautiful words every man or women want to live in the world many person men or woman want to start a new life between fifty to seventy years and they try to find a new patner for spent a happy life it is right if they try to spent a happy life with a patner
Societal “norms” and all the rhetoric that goes with them can change all they want but basic male and female DNA does not change. Like Popeye said “ I yam what’s I yam”
Gender confusion is disruptive to our species. Men and women are each uniquely equipped to contribute different things to the world.
Media in my generation tried very hard to convince women they don’t need men so women took over some male roles.
Now these women complain that men are unchivalrous and entitled.
Can’t have It both ways.
I find it very telling a good amount of these people alone at older ages keep repeating. “I love it! Being single is great. I’m so happy. I’m so happy. I’m so happy.”
I think it’s a massive cope.
What do single men over 60 want? It sure as heck isn't women over 60!
😂😂😂 I’d say usually that’s right.
I would like a woman near my age
I just turned 60; my husband of 27 years has cheated on me 3 times ( that I know for sure) no telling how many times he’s cheated that I didn’t know; I finally put my foot down and said ENOUGH IS ENOUGH!!! He’s pouting; blaming me for our problems! I’m done!! Ready for my freedom! I’m an RN, but have been out of the workforce for 10 years! Raised our son who is now 24! I’m ready for my freedom!!! I don’t feel I look 60; I’m told I look 50; but I don’t want a man who just wants another “mommy” to look after him!
The gal with the white hair is super charming! The brunette is so smart, she understands History!
Hello 👋 dear, how are you doing, u look familiar
As my widowed older sister says “if you can find me a 96 year old millionaire with 1 month to live I might consider remarrying”. Haha. She’s very happy living her single life.
So sad but honey enjoy your life 😉
J. Griffin,
And that is probably just what men over 60 want to avoid. "Many a true word is spoken in jest!"
Love the intro. Women over 60 should know by now!
thank you so much even not having a man in my life, I still can treat men in general this good to feel good as an a individual
At the age of 24 I dated a guy who was 52 but he broke my heart the guy was over controlling and everytime he never listened to me he was so mean old mens to me is no go zone to me
My husband was 15 years older than me when we married and that was a stretch how the hell do you marry a man that can be your grandfather....
I agree with the taken away from men a lot women don't realize that a man needs to know that you feel that he is intelligent and capable. And if you're asking him to do something for you and then you'd say no that's wrong please do it this way then to him he's hearing he is incompetent
Hello
For people to stay out of their lawn
red drib That’s great !!! Hahaha 😁
A hero is someone you can turn to someone you trust someone you respect man needs to feel needed otherwise they'll feel obsolete every time they do kind honorable courteous act for you thanks him show him how much you appreciate it either, a touch and thank you a hug and thank you a kiss on the cheek and to thank you a kiss on the mouth and thank you men love attention like this not just words be demonstrative ladies
& my guy is my hero. Seriously.
Hello
Hello beautiful friend how are you doing today, it's a pleasure meeting you .
Hello 👋 dear, how are you doing, ur name looks so familiar
The saddest thing here is reading all the comments down below it sounds like the majority of you have just given up on life altogether and even love and are actually very happy about being alone. So that's it? you just say i give up i don't want to be happy anymore? Love is absolutely 100% worth fighting for its amazing having someone there beside you to share everything and anything with even the smallest things make a huge difference they make life worth living don't give up. Yes men and women are different but that is the point! You two become one he makes up for what u need and u bring what he needs. Not everyone is the same and i know there bad people out there that have hurt you i know from experience believe me it's not easy but there some great people out there also don't give up and go find them and bring love and happiness back into your life.
It's not your fault you've always looked like a 75 years old man even when you were in your 20s.
Re the example of discussing a meal, maybe just pursue his feelings or ideas instead of jumping in to offer yours. He's telling you something about himself. It's an opportunity to learn more about him. Dig a little with genuine interest. You might learn something of value.
...........that he likes his steak well-done?
Clarice Aust Very sarcastic, Clarice. You’ve prob been burned often. No. Perhaps he’ll explain how he likes his steak and depending on his answer, or your follow-up question, you’ll find out where he had had such a great meal. Maybe it was Tokyo. This opens up the conversation for you to ask him questions about Tokyo. This is TOTALLY non-threatening. He may even ask you out on a second date.
@@ClariceAust ...and hoping he'll cook it and clean up after himself!
Penelope, that is exactly what I was thinking
Men are still and always will be that little boy. If you think of them as little boys, when you don't want to scar him, when you want to encourage him to be wonderful.., then you will be treating the man well.
As an older lady once said to me, most older men want one of two things: a nurse or a purse.
My cousin, from southern VA, said they want the three Bs…..a biscuit, a bed and a booty.
I'm young and can take care of you honey
Excellent advice!! & soo true! Loved it
Sounds like a woman has to walk on egg shells to cater to the male ego. I would rather be myself.
You would rather cater to your own ego.
@@hornet5761 No, I would rather be happy.
So you can't be yourself if you are polite and appreciative? Why not?
Right, like women don't have egos? Get real.
Mr. D. Yes we do..we’re also human.
A friend of mine is a psychiatrist, and he related some statistics compiled by the AMA years ago that said that 2nd marriages after age 35 had less than a 1% chance of lasting 5 years, and 3rd, 4th etc had exponentially lower chances of even lasting 1 year.