Hope you guys got to know a new side of Jes! If you would like to share your thoughts on the episode, do let us know in the comments! Let's all keep an open-mind and respect her story. (:
the scariest part of coming out is the insults and humiliation being targeted at your own parents instead of yourself. Bearing with the hate relatives have among homosexuals is a lot easier than watching your own parent being called the cause. It all goes down to "how did you raise your daughter for her to become like this?". I know that if I were to ever come out to my mother, she would blame herself for not bringing me upright. I can't come out knowing the fact that if I do, I would be putting my mother in a position where she would be subjected to criticism of how she was never a great mother just because I did not just like men.
Can someone interview Leah? She’s such a good host and person at heart but she needs to share the story of how she’s misconceived by the elderlies/ partners parents just bc she’s not the typical girl-next-door sort of look 😍
sending hugs to Jes for being so brave and for coming such a long way! 🤍 props to zula for contributing to the part of the change that we would all like to see more of and to Leah for being such a good host!
I hate the kind of culture where some families just think they can say anything they want to your face just because they are related to u, even if it is something negative. And unconditional love from family is very important, no matter how your child is like, I feel.
I was raised and educated as a child that blue is for boys and pink is for girls. So do you think it is bullshit? Just like you think it is bull shit because you are not in my timeline. Right or wrong who decide?
The saddest part about life is that the people that you love the most, live with everyday, grow up with, trust the most, the people you call family that you expect will have your back....will judge you the harshest. Betrayal only comes from those closest.
About judging the harshest, I think it's also because of the feeling we have towards them. I mean you may feel sad/mad if a stranger said something bad about you, but it does not have as much effect as when people very close to you say the same exact things.
Yea, sadly relatable. I live in *extremely* homophobic country. I am a gay demigirl which makes things harder. When I was 15 I decided to tell my mom about my sexuality (back then I didn't figure out my gender). She didn't take it seriously at all and still talks harshly about LGBT+ community when I sit right next to her. One phrase that I clearly remember: "These people should be burnt alive". It hurt me so much that even a year after I can remember it clearly. I know that she loves me, but I don't get why she says things like that when she knows that my fragile self-esteem can be affected? I am just a human like everyone else, why don't I deserve to live and why do I hear it from my own mom? It hurts fr..
it’s hard to see lgbtq content especially with media censorship in SG and to see a major platform like TSL being so open and making more content about it makes me so happy!!
Or for people with mental health issues (like me). Relatives always tell you to 加油 (fight on) or 不要想这么多 (don't think so much), but it's not like I can control it. And if I'm already in a depressed state, telling me 加油 will make it worse. I'm really dreading CNY. I just want to hang out with my friends this CNY and not my family...
Dear Jes, thank you for being so brave to share your story. it really takes a lot of courage to do so. so thank you for that. i’m sorry that wanting to be yourself is something you were afraid of and had to be embarrassed of. it sure is damn sad but thank you for sharing your story, shedding light and advocating to acceptance of LOVE in all forms🤍 Jia You Jas
Her story is as Singaporean as it gets, like this story is more relatable than the LGBT thing abroad. Like this is so Singapore all the culture and vibes. If we are non LGBT, we don't get it, but after this, I think I get y'all a little bit more. Jiayous for bridging the gap.
I've watched many interviews and it seems like the main hurdle is always family. Which is the most difficult because we have to see them every day. Hopefully, things change for the better, if not in this generation, then the next. Everyone deserves to be happy.
When Jes mentioned about she had to apologise for being who she want to be to her family, I really want to bring out that you have done nothing wrong, you don’t have to apologise for being someone you have always wanted to be because that’s what makes you happy, you live the way you want not how others want and don’t feel ashamed of who you are. I hope in the future a lot of more people could accept this for a FACT and not forcing anyone to fit into their idealised norm. Sorry my English is not my first language so there might be grammatical mistakes 😭but seriously this video got me teared up a bit, I wish you all the best Jes. Thank you for sharing this valuable story.
It’s okay to be true to yourself. Living for your own happiness is the most important thing in life. Speak when you are ready and know that it is only out of respect to share with your family, anyone’s adverse reaction (if any) shouldn’t determine how happiness looks like for you. Brave on!
Jes seems like a very mature, sensible, and a kind person who'll treat their closest friends, family and lover with utmost respect. I hope people associate someone with what's inside, rather than from outside appearance and other unnecessary 'label'. Kudos to Jes for sharing, truly respect!
hey im a trans and gay male,, just wanted to say its brave for you to talk abt this, Jes! im currently in sec sch and im v v grateful that i have supportive LGBTQ+ friends, allies and also a v naise bf. sadly i understand being disapproved by my parents,, ive not come out to them bc idw to bother them,, but u are v brave fr talking abt this! ure such a role model, ty Jes
Hey don't say that, being gay doesn't mean you deserve any less of a right or any less of love than anyone else okay? Also I hope you realise that your comment is quite insensitive and may negatively impact others.
thank you for this, jes. i really needed it. i jus came out to my parents 2 weeks ago out of pressure (as my parents are really religious), and clearly they cant accept me being gay. we quarreled until it triggered my panic disorder. fortunately, i have some frens who are really accepting of who i am. until now it still terrifies me as im currently hospitalised and idk how to face my parents. but one thing for sure: just be yourself, really.
Hey Zhi Nan, idk if u rmb me but I knew you from a few years ago. Saw ur FB post and want you to know that life is though but there will always be people cheering for you. We were never close and you might be a different Zhi Nan but if you used to play VG and was in that WhatsApp grp like 5/6 years back then I'm wishing you all the best
I'm sorry if i am ignorant, but would you mind explaining briefly what is Pansexual ? coz... well, i saw one Uncle Roger's and he said he is attracted to a wok, after that he joked about he is pansexual and i never actually thought that was a pun so, please kindly enlighten me
@@ru1ennn but isn't that considered as bisexual ? sorry to say, but aside from heterosexual and homosexual, i don't really know much about other sexuality .
@@evd7733 nope, pansexual means that you're attracted to anyone regardless of their gender, which means u only like the person due to his/her personality and not gender preference!
As a straight person, although I cannot relate to the story personally, I strongly feel the need for community to normalise this norm. Being in the LGBTQ+ should not be seen as something wrong as the most important thing is still the individual's character. Kudos to Zula and Jes for sharing!
Whether a person approves of your lifestyle or not, he or she needs to be considerate and keep their comments to themselves. Honestly, toxic family members and relatives are the worst sometimes. They use the "it is because we are family and we love you that we tell you..." Nope. Filter your words Sir / Ma'am. If you have nothing nice to say, don't say anything at all.
i just want to give jes a big hug and tell her thank you, good job, and that everything will be okay. And to everyone that is watching this and feeling like they are in some kind of funk, you are great, you are beautiful, you are doing what you can to get by, everything will be okay
💕 it makes me remember telling my mother about me being gay, and the last thing i said was please dont think too much cause i know she will stay up overthinking 🥺 im so glad like channels like this are like normalising lgbtq+ topics and it sort of spreads hope on a more accepting and changing future 🙆♂️
Not sure why I cried when she shared about her family issues. I’m so proud of you Jes ❤️ I really hope the world can be more open-minded and one day, we will no longer need to celebrate Pink Dot because we are all equal. Thanks for being such a strong advocate for the LGBTQ community 🤭 we need more of such people! Jiayou!
It's not easy for LGBTQIA+ to be out and open. It's even harder for their family/older generation, cos they have to face all those 三姑六婆. So stay strong, keep sharing love, love is love ❤️🧡💛💚💙💜
Hey Jes. Respect for coming out and speaking up. Stay strong and true to your goals and believes. No one in life should tell another how to live theirs.
I have been loving Jes's presence in the TSL and ZULA videos! Hearing about her story made me cry, even though I cannot relate to it. I was especially touched by the part when she said majority of the time she is on her phone talking to strangers who are struggling, and she wishes her mom can know and be proud of her in that way. Such a kind person!
22:23 just hearing her story, I find that inspirational. she is brave for even telling this online, and maybe even inspire others who are experiencing the same things to be braver. I am liking Jes even more now that I know her story. I hope you guys feature more of these kinds of stories to spread more awareness. Bravo, Zula.
I’m a singaporean malay gay man aged 35 this yr, i could relate to her. I don’t celebrate hari raya anymore since 2017 cause i’m afraid my relatives would judge me of being single at my age. Most of the time i feel so miserable when hari raya is approaching and i would also lock myself in the room most of the times, even relatives come to the house for raya visiting also I don’t go out and say hi to them.
Hey Jes! Thanks for sharing your personal stories and experience with everyone out here :) You’re really brave :) We’re always here for you Jes💕 For anyone reading this, there’s always someone out here for you and no matter what you’re feeling, just remember that there will always be a part of this world that is filled with love and acceptance 💕
Jess has been an inspiration to me because I found myself as part of the community: my style, my personality etc and I hope one day I'll be brave enough to talk about it with my family
wow, jess you’re so strong, it’s something so hard and something i struggle with everyday but at least there’s people like you around showing me that who i am is ok.
Don’t have to bother what others thinks or talk about you!! Just be yourself! Me seeing you being yourself and you being happy with it, I’m so proud of you Jes ! 🥰
Yes let's go JES!!! I'm a lesbian and I've been watching TSL for her because It feels great to see local LGBTQ+ representation online :,) proud of TSL for being so loving to the community yall are the best! proud of Jes too!!
i’m so fucking proud of jes for all she’s done for herself and others we love you jes!!!! your power makes me feel like i can do just as much for our community:)
Absolutely one of the best videos Zula has done, periodt. Jes’ story really hit home with me esp on the coming out thing man. Really reassured me that sometimes coming out isn’t needed as long as ur comfortable and ppl u trust and love are chill with it too. Altho I’d like to just add in a bit of some journalistic advice tho. It’d be great if u guys could put down mental health or important hotlines in the description box or maybe show them on the screen too. That way, if someone was to get triggered or was in harms way or needed a resource, it’d be there for them, and also for others to look into it and educate themselves too. It’d be amazing to see some hotline links in the bio one day, bc I’ve realized lots of ppl don’t know about them. But besides that, wanna say this is a really honest video, the first tsl vid to make me cry
Also just wanna clarify bc I forgot to put this in but when I meant the hotline links will be great is when sensitive topics such as mental health, sexuality and etc etc are being talked about.
Kudos to Jes for the courage to share their story! In a way this hits home since my parents would probably react that way (or worse) if I attempt that convo with them. And also the difficulty in trying to explain my polyam relationship choices. I love that at for Jes, their sister turned out to be such a great supporter!
It's great to see more and more people being more open about the LGBTQ+ community. Thanks TSL for making this video for those in the closet or even those who are already out to be comfortable with themselves.
I'm liking these interviews in Zula, especially since you're doing a lot of topics that can encourage discussions. You have a new sub. Also, I have to say, I think Jes is very good looking.
This is really Relatable and Jes, Thank You for doing this. I can’t wait to share my success and experience coming out especially after BMT... as Genderfluid... the overwhelming support, being expose in army, my family reaching out to me... Wow I just need a medium to share!
can we just 🥰🥰💯💯💯👍👍👍👍😊😊😊👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻 thank you jes and thank you zula
Yes, truth is the struggle is real. There will be like thoughts of frets which somehow keeps the pace back and forth. True said, Comes out of the closet when you feel is the time. Most of the points which like aligned mindset of both parties, being public with the relationship, PDA etc that’s pretty much resonates for me hahaha. Thank you Jes & Zula for the video.
jes is v admirable for sharing all her feelings on what happened i mean even with my immediate family probably being a lot more accepting about it, i think i would never talk about this with them (not that i've even gotten into a homosexual rs as of now) i think i can try to be more open w my younger brother at least tho
I'm bi, I used to date a girl when I was in sec 3. But we broke up due to family and loss of feelings for each other. My sister and I are really close which gives me all the courage to come up to her and tell her who I am,she is totally cool with it. The second one who knew about me dating a girl was my mom,she could not accept it at first,and told me that she will bring me to see a doctor if that were to continue. She kept on questioning me from whatever that reminds her of it. I did not tell my dad about it but I knew that he got the hint. I hold hands and hug her with my gf in front of my family and told them that we are just "best friend" my dad told me that it somehow felt wrong and kept hinting me that he knew something was off between us and that we both are not just "best friend" . As for my gf,her parents was a little strict side. I remembered that my gf told me that her mom found out about us as she was browsing through her text between her and me,which makes me so scared. Her mom once texted me using her phone telling me to stay away from her daughter as I was being a bad influence. I felt kinda sad as I knew that our relationship wasn't normal. And that's when I lost feelings for my girlfriend,she is a type of clingy person. Even in public,she would just casually told me that she was desperate for my kiss. She would even announce to others about us being together when I told her to keep it just between me and her as I was so scared of being judge by everyone else even though my friends are okay with it. At that point of time,I really wanted to be alone by myself. So I started distance away from her. I started to ignore my gf messages and even avoided her in school. She noticed it and one day she asked me what's wrong and why have I been avoiding her. I wanted to let out everything I have been carrying onto my back but I couldn't,all I could say to her is that we should not continue this kind of relationship and to go back to being friends like we both used to. She respected my decision and now we both have parted our ways,both of us did not talk like we used to now as we both has been really awkward with each other. I graduated from my secondary school last year and moved to a new environment where I could start a fresh. Unlike jas,I actually didn't tell my new friends that I have used to dating girls as I was afraid that I was being judge by others. I have been telling myself recently that I am straight and I like boys,not girls. I really hope I could do well and fit into the normal people.
Honestly we shouldn't judge or like discriminate .we should just respect them .love is just love, doesn't really matter about gender so I hope we could just give them space lah
Kudos to Zula team! Great to see this episode in my feeds! I have tons of respect for Jes, you are so brave to share your experience with all and even willingly respond and accept DMs from those who needed some help. The LGBTQ+ and all minorities have suffered alot of discrimination. What I personally wish for is for all parents and family members to accept their loved ones as who they are. there are things that are really wrong e.g. killing lives, inflicting hurt on others etc, but sexual preference / sexuality does not exactly fall into right and wrong spheres. We have ethics and beliefs to uphold, but when it comes to an individual's sexuality, one should respect the individual's preference as long as he/she does not hurt himself/herself nor do they inflict hurt on others, I think that is good enough.
thank you for sharing your story with us jes. you're really strong and came this far, i wish you only happiness from now on. keep doing and being you! you deserve your own happiness and lots of love ❤️ ps. everyone is beautiful uniquely in their own way, don't let the typical stereotypes define who you are
Don’t know Jes personally but hey! I really appreciate that you are being honest and open to share your stories. And I’m pretty sure that there will be more people (even though there’s like a lot right now but I mean... the more the merrier right?) who will hop on the bandwagon and be accepting and welcoming to people who are coming out in the years to come! 😄
You did great Jes! I have family members whom we love for being brilliant individuals just like you. Keep on creating content and being yourself. There’s no right or wrong in your case, it is living life to the fullest and love will conquer all. Jiayou, jiayou, jiayou!
Dear Jes, I am not sure if you gonna see this. I would not normally sit down in front of my computer and not skip the videos that I'm watching but I did not skipped this particular video, first and of all I am sorry that you had a tough time coming out to your family. Don't be afraid to be the real you, I am a mother of 4 kids and I will always be proud of them no matter their sexual orientation, I want my kids to be able to reached out to me about everything. Stay strong and be HAPPY! Take care and greetings from the US!
Although singapore is a very great country, I have to admit that this country is still very stereotypical and living in this country myself, i see alot of people being quick to judge and would not accept the way someone is. I hope that every single singaporean can have the chance to see another person up close who is a trans- gender/black/white/coloured/gay/etc and finally see the bigger picture and finally see that we are all human and to treat each other better. However, we must all admit that singaporeans are slowly recognising that there are people like this and instead of shaming them, we are extendind them our helping hand.Remember this, don't ever fall in love with your gender, fall in love with your person that you deserve. God bless Singapore god bless yall🇸🇬🇸🇬🇸🇬
I'm so happy to know there is many other LGBTQ people in Singapore. Honestly, majority of the people around me are hetero but my friends were very accepting of my sexuality. But it really nice to see others out there. Thank you for sharing your story
I feel so sorry for what you had to go through. LGBTQ+ people deserve to be loved too! I never understood people who were so opposed to LGBT relationships because ultimately, it has nothing to do with you in any way shape or form.
Everyone should have a friend like Mavis. The world will be a better place. I remember a quote from a public speaker which goes: "Being gay can be influenced. Good luck with that."
Just want to put this out here: Never ever put the blame unto someone who decides to come out for the better of their mind and soul / NEVER push someone to come out when they are still searching themselves. Even when you’re currently unable to accept what they are telling you about their choices, NEVER EVER make it their fault. I would say, they are born this way and it already take them quite some time to finally find themselves what makes them happy so if you add on the reasons for them NOT to come out or accept themselves, what kind of outcome do you want after that? People have ended their lives because of the negativities towards LGBTQ+ and thinking it’s their fault or they’re wrong. I love the LGBTQ+ community ❤️🧡💛💚💙💜 🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️
i’m in love with my straight best friend and i’m still pretty closeted watching this vid really helps boost my confidence and courage to be proud of myself in singapore and find it in me to one day let my family know who i really am
thanks Jes for sharing your stories and thanks Zula for this video 🥰🙏 I have so many LGBT friends and I just wanna let y'all know that I'm always here for you guys!!!!
Wow, Jes, listening to you is really inspiring. I think its not just for the LBGTQ+ community also for interracial relationships too. Not many parents can take it too... Can see the pain in your eyes when speaking about your family. , Sincerely wish u happiness and things will definitely gets better & easier. ❤️🧡💛💚💙💜
Thank you Jes for sharing, thank you for being there... Hopefully there will be a time that theres no need for anyone to talk about LGBTQ... Hopefully it will be just the norm where LGBTQ is just like anyone falling in love with anyone being together with anyone each one wants to...
Didn't want to tear up while watching this but i failed.. Hahaha! Too relatable when it comes to parents and family members who aren't as accepting as what we thought they'd be. Thank you for representing us LGBTQ+ on here and sharing your story Jes! I personally am only out to friends(and mom) but not my family or relatives and i agree, it's tough to do it especially if there's no "plan b" if anything bad happens.
Hope you guys got to know a new side of Jes! If you would like to share your thoughts on the episode, do let us know in the comments! Let's all keep an open-mind and respect her story. (:
the scariest part of coming out is the insults and humiliation being targeted at your own parents instead of yourself. Bearing with the hate relatives have among homosexuals is a lot easier than watching your own parent being called the cause. It all goes down to "how did you raise your daughter for her to become like this?". I know that if I were to ever come out to my mother, she would blame herself for not bringing me upright. I can't come out knowing the fact that if I do, I would be putting my mother in a position where she would be subjected to criticism of how she was never a great mother just because I did not just like men.
lmao your profile pic made me think I wrote this comment
bro im sorry and i wish u well ik this is 2 years late but i hope ur mom accepts u
Can someone interview Leah? She’s such a good host and person at heart but she needs to share the story of how she’s misconceived by the elderlies/ partners parents just bc she’s not the typical girl-next-door sort of look 😍
She's pretty ... frankly reminds me of mediacorp queen Zoe Tay ... maybe she's secretly her daughter ?
16:56 damn. she has to apologize for being who is she is, that truly hurts.
Dude jes looks sooooo friggin good in shirts
Woohoo Jes!!!
yess
sending hugs to Jes for being so brave and for coming such a long way! 🤍 props to zula for contributing to the part of the change that we would all like to see more of and to Leah for being such a good host!
I agree with your very wholesome comment 🥰
I hate the kind of culture where some families just think they can say anything they want to your face just because they are related to u, even if it is something negative. And unconditional love from family is very important, no matter how your child is like, I feel.
That’s so true ...
Its like that in my country, hurting your children is also normalized as a kind of discipline here. Really sucks tbh.
That is very true tho
I was raised and educated as a child that blue is for boys and pink is for girls. So do you think it is bullshit? Just like you think it is bull shit because you are not in my timeline. Right or wrong who decide?
The saddest part about life is that the people that you love the most, live with everyday, grow up with, trust the most, the people you call family that you expect will have your back....will judge you the harshest.
Betrayal only comes from those closest.
About judging the harshest, I think it's also because of the feeling we have towards them. I mean you may feel sad/mad if a stranger said something bad about you, but it does not have as much effect as when people very close to you say the same exact things.
Yea, sadly relatable. I live in *extremely* homophobic country. I am a gay demigirl which makes things harder. When I was 15 I decided to tell my mom about my sexuality (back then I didn't figure out my gender). She didn't take it seriously at all and still talks harshly about LGBT+ community when I sit right next to her. One phrase that I clearly remember: "These people should be burnt alive". It hurt me so much that even a year after I can remember it clearly. I know that she loves me, but I don't get why she says things like that when she knows that my fragile self-esteem can be affected? I am just a human like everyone else, why don't I deserve to live and why do I hear it from my own mom? It hurts fr..
Jes is so brave to share their story
it’s hard to see lgbtq content especially with media censorship in SG and to see a major platform like TSL being so open and making more content about it makes me so happy!!
CNY is the worst time for LGBTQ people in Singapore.
Or for people with mental health issues (like me). Relatives always tell you to 加油 (fight on) or 不要想这么多 (don't think so much), but it's not like I can control it. And if I'm already in a depressed state, telling me 加油 will make it worse. I'm really dreading CNY. I just want to hang out with my friends this CNY and not my family...
Cos cny is full of "when find bf ah? When married ah? When baby ah? "
I'm straight and I HATEEEEE cny too.
Dear Jes, thank you for being so brave to share your story. it really takes a lot of courage to do so. so thank you for that.
i’m sorry that wanting to be yourself is something you were afraid of and had to be embarrassed of.
it sure is damn sad but thank you for sharing your story, shedding light and advocating to acceptance of LOVE in all forms🤍
Jia You Jas
Her story is as Singaporean as it gets, like this story is more relatable than the LGBT thing abroad. Like this is so Singapore all the culture and vibes. If we are non LGBT, we don't get it, but after this, I think I get y'all a little bit more. Jiayous for bridging the gap.
I've watched many interviews and it seems like the main hurdle is always family. Which is the most difficult because we have to see them every day. Hopefully, things change for the better, if not in this generation, then the next. Everyone deserves to be happy.
When Jes mentioned about she had to apologise for being who she want to be to her family, I really want to bring out that you have done nothing wrong, you don’t have to apologise for being someone you have always wanted to be because that’s what makes you happy, you live the way you want not how others want and don’t feel ashamed of who you are. I hope in the future a lot of more people could accept this for a FACT and not forcing anyone to fit into their idealised norm. Sorry my English is not my first language so there might be grammatical mistakes 😭but seriously this video got me teared up a bit, I wish you all the best Jes. Thank you for sharing this valuable story.
I dont have the brave to tell my family yet .. Im so proud of you Jes .
stay strong💕 there are people who love you for who you are!
and it's okay! take your time :-)
stay strong!! take your time :D
It’s okay to be true to yourself. Living for your own happiness is the most important thing in life. Speak when you are ready and know that it is only out of respect to share with your family, anyone’s adverse reaction (if any) shouldn’t determine how happiness looks like for you. Brave on!
Jes seems like a very mature, sensible, and a kind person who'll treat their closest friends, family and lover with utmost respect. I hope people associate someone with what's inside, rather than from outside appearance and other unnecessary 'label'. Kudos to Jes for sharing, truly respect!
hey im a trans and gay male,, just wanted to say its brave for you to talk abt this, Jes! im currently in sec sch and im v v grateful that i have supportive LGBTQ+ friends, allies and also a v naise bf. sadly i understand being disapproved by my parents,, ive not come out to them bc idw to bother them,, but u are v brave fr talking abt this! ure such a role model, ty Jes
Hey don't say that, being gay doesn't mean you deserve any less of a right or any less of love than anyone else okay? Also I hope you realise that your comment is quite insensitive and may negatively impact others.
@@user-wz6qf7td1j it’s always the people with no profile picture that have the most to say
@@yxt8948 lol
@@yxt8948 u have nothing to do :D
@@autumn2008 did I ask bitch bruh
thank you for this, jes. i really needed it. i jus came out to my parents 2 weeks ago out of pressure (as my parents are really religious), and clearly they cant accept me being gay. we quarreled until it triggered my panic disorder. fortunately, i have some frens who are really accepting of who i am. until now it still terrifies me as im currently hospitalised and idk how to face my parents. but one thing for sure: just be yourself, really.
just wanted to tell you that i love you for who you are, stay strong and positive 💛
Hey Zhi Nan, idk if u rmb me but I knew you from a few years ago. Saw ur FB post and want you to know that life is though but there will always be people cheering for you. We were never close and you might be a different Zhi Nan but if you used to play VG and was in that WhatsApp grp like 5/6 years back then I'm wishing you all the best
stay strong and stay safe!! you'll get through this :D jiayou!!
Takes time... be strong. It will be better
stay strong my guy, you can get through this!
Jes, you are a real inspiration!
Actually all people want to be accepted and be who they are and express themselves
Yes! I never knew I wanted this ep before this came out, I hope I can relate as I came out as Pansexual last month 🥺🌼
Pansexual pride and CONGRATULATIONS 😌💞
I'm sorry if i am ignorant, but would you mind explaining briefly what is Pansexual ?
coz... well, i saw one Uncle Roger's and he said he is attracted to a wok, after that he joked about he is pansexual and i never actually thought that was a pun
so, please kindly enlighten me
@@evd7733 pansexual means that you’re attracted to people of all genders !!
@@ru1ennn but isn't that considered as bisexual ?
sorry to say, but aside from heterosexual and homosexual, i don't really know much about other sexuality .
@@evd7733 nope, pansexual means that you're attracted to anyone regardless of their gender, which means u only like the person due to his/her personality and not gender preference!
As a straight person, although I cannot relate to the story personally, I strongly feel the need for community to normalise this norm. Being in the LGBTQ+ should not be seen as something wrong as the most important thing is still the individual's character.
Kudos to Zula and Jes for sharing!
Whether a person approves of your lifestyle or not, he or she needs to be considerate and keep their comments to themselves. Honestly, toxic family members and relatives are the worst sometimes. They use the "it is because we are family and we love you that we tell you..."
Nope. Filter your words Sir / Ma'am. If you have nothing nice to say, don't say anything at all.
my aunt is part of the lgbtq community too!! my family didn’t accept her but i’m glad they eventually did! i’m so proud of uu
i just want to give jes a big hug and tell her thank you, good job, and that everything will be okay. And to everyone that is watching this and feeling like they are in some kind of funk, you are great, you are beautiful, you are doing what you can to get by, everything will be okay
💕 it makes me remember telling my mother about me being gay, and the last thing i said was please dont think too much cause i know she will stay up overthinking 🥺 im so glad like channels like this are like normalising lgbtq+ topics and it sort of spreads hope on a more accepting and changing future 🙆♂️
Not sure why I cried when she shared about her family issues. I’m so proud of you Jes ❤️ I really hope the world can be more open-minded and one day, we will no longer need to celebrate Pink Dot because we are all equal. Thanks for being such a strong advocate for the LGBTQ community 🤭 we need more of such people! Jiayou!
It's not easy for LGBTQIA+ to be out and open. It's even harder for their family/older generation, cos they have to face all those 三姑六婆. So stay strong, keep sharing love, love is love ❤️🧡💛💚💙💜
so true I can't even come out to my dad and relatives for they are super Christian
(btw my pic is me and my older sister)
Hey Jes. Respect for coming out and speaking up. Stay strong and true to your goals and believes. No one in life should tell another how to live theirs.
I have been loving Jes's presence in the TSL and ZULA videos! Hearing about her story made me cry, even though I cannot relate to it. I was especially touched by the part when she said majority of the time she is on her phone talking to strangers who are struggling, and she wishes her mom can know and be proud of her in that way. Such a kind person!
22:23 just hearing her story, I find that inspirational. she is brave for even telling this online, and maybe even inspire others who are experiencing the same things to be braver.
I am liking Jes even more now that I know her story. I hope you guys feature more of these kinds of stories to spread more awareness. Bravo, Zula.
I’m a singaporean malay gay man aged 35 this yr, i could relate to her. I don’t celebrate hari raya anymore since 2017 cause i’m afraid my relatives would judge me of being single at my age. Most of the time i feel so miserable when hari raya is approaching and i would also lock myself in the room most of the times, even relatives come to the house for raya visiting also I don’t go out and say hi to them.
Im a closeted trans guy in malaysia and im still a minor. This is my phobia of not getting to hang out with my family for being who i am
@@bungerman7560 hi bro
Can I speak with you in insta?
@@gunrocks3831 haha yeah @torricle
Thank you for this, Jes and Zula! Using your platform to portray us LGBT folk as normal people who just want to live our lives is the way to go.
My biggest wish for you is that you will be able to enjoy your CNY from now on!!! So proud of you 🤍👊🏻
Hey Jes! Thanks for sharing your personal stories and experience with everyone out here :) You’re really brave :) We’re always here for you Jes💕 For anyone reading this, there’s always someone out here for you and no matter what you’re feeling, just remember that there will always be a part of this world that is filled with love and acceptance 💕
Just a random question are you from sg
Jess has been an inspiration to me because I found myself as part of the community: my style, my personality etc and I hope one day I'll be brave enough to talk about it with my family
wow, jess you’re so strong, it’s something so hard and something i struggle with everyday but at least there’s people like you around showing me that who i am is ok.
I see Jes, I click. And no regrets because she proves to be true and goddamn cool. We LOVE you!!
Don’t have to bother what others thinks or talk about you!! Just be yourself! Me seeing you being yourself and you being happy with it, I’m so proud of you Jes ! 🥰
thanks Jes and Zula for sharing!! The advice portion is really good
My heart dropped in the first clip lmao imagine if I texted that to my mum too I’m crynnnnn😫😫
30:24 She is so mature and wise for her age. I love it. I quoted RuPaul in Mandon's video, and I'll say it again, you have to love yourself first.
Yes let's go JES!!! I'm a lesbian and I've been watching TSL for her because It feels great to see local LGBTQ+ representation online :,) proud of TSL for being so loving to the community yall are the best! proud of Jes too!!
i’m so fucking proud of jes for all she’s done for herself and others
we love you jes!!!! your power makes me feel like i can do just as much for our community:)
Absolutely one of the best videos Zula has done, periodt. Jes’ story really hit home with me esp on the coming out thing man. Really reassured me that sometimes coming out isn’t needed as long as ur comfortable and ppl u trust and love are chill with it too. Altho I’d like to just add in a bit of some journalistic advice tho. It’d be great if u guys could put down mental health or important hotlines in the description box or maybe show them on the screen too. That way, if someone was to get triggered or was in harms way or needed a resource, it’d be there for them, and also for others to look into it and educate themselves too. It’d be amazing to see some hotline links in the bio one day, bc I’ve realized lots of ppl don’t know about them. But besides that, wanna say this is a really honest video, the first tsl vid to make me cry
Also just wanna clarify bc I forgot to put this in but when I meant the hotline links will be great is when sensitive topics such as mental health, sexuality and etc etc are being talked about.
Kudos to Jes for the courage to share their story!
In a way this hits home since my parents would probably react that way (or worse) if I attempt that convo with them. And also the difficulty in trying to explain my polyam relationship choices.
I love that at for Jes, their sister turned out to be such a great supporter!
I support and admire you Jes!
It's great to see more and more people being more open about the LGBTQ+ community. Thanks TSL for making this video for those in the closet or even those who are already out to be comfortable with themselves.
I'm liking these interviews in Zula, especially since you're doing a lot of topics that can encourage discussions. You have a new sub.
Also, I have to say, I think Jes is very good looking.
This is really Relatable and Jes, Thank You for doing this.
I can’t wait to share my success and experience coming out especially after BMT... as Genderfluid... the overwhelming support, being expose in army, my family reaching out to me...
Wow I just need a medium to share!
Sending love to Jes and everyone else who is going through similar struggles 🙆🏽♀️🥰
LEAH'S DEMON SLAYER SHIRT THOOO
s/o to Leah, she’s the best host so far and Jes for everything she has gone through 💪🏻
Thank you for doing this interview Jes ❤️ it’s so brave for you to do this. I’m sure you’ve touched and helped some souls out there with this.
Omg I tried to not cry but by the 20 minute mark I’m already like 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺
Is the Mavis that Jes mentioned, Brenda' Mavis!!??
@@xxiivivixn it's not!! HAHAHA I ASKED but great Mavis nonetheless!!!
remember that safety always comes first if you want to come out. conversion therapy is still practised in singapore.
cancel conv therapy
can we just
🥰🥰💯💯💯👍👍👍👍😊😊😊👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻 thank you jes and thank you zula
Yes, truth is the struggle is real. There will be like thoughts of frets which somehow keeps the pace back and forth.
True said, Comes out of the closet when you feel is the time.
Most of the points which like aligned mindset of both parties, being public with the relationship, PDA etc that’s pretty much resonates for me hahaha.
Thank you Jes & Zula for the video.
jes is v admirable for sharing all her feelings on what happened
i mean even with my immediate family probably being a lot more accepting about it, i think i would never talk about this with them (not that i've even gotten into a homosexual rs as of now)
i think i can try to be more open w my younger brother at least tho
I'm bi, I used to date a girl when I was in sec 3. But we broke up due to family and loss of feelings for each other. My sister and I are really close which gives me all the courage to come up to her and tell her who I am,she is totally cool with it. The second one who knew about me dating a girl was my mom,she could not accept it at first,and told me that she will bring me to see a doctor if that were to continue. She kept on questioning me from whatever that reminds her of it. I did not tell my dad about it but I knew that he got the hint. I hold hands and hug her with my gf in front of my family and told them that we are just "best friend" my dad told me that it somehow felt wrong and kept hinting me that he knew something was off between us and that we both are not just "best friend" . As for my gf,her parents was a little strict side. I remembered that my gf told me that her mom found out about us as she was browsing through her text between her and me,which makes me so scared. Her mom once texted me using her phone telling me to stay away from her daughter as I was being a bad influence. I felt kinda sad as I knew that our relationship wasn't normal. And that's when I lost feelings for my girlfriend,she is a type of clingy person. Even in public,she would just casually told me that she was desperate for my kiss. She would even announce to others about us being together when I told her to keep it just between me and her as I was so scared of being judge by everyone else even though my friends are okay with it. At that point of time,I really wanted to be alone by myself. So I started distance away from her. I started to ignore my gf messages and even avoided her in school. She noticed it and one day she asked me what's wrong and why have I been avoiding her. I wanted to let out everything I have been carrying onto my back but I couldn't,all I could say to her is that we should not continue this kind of relationship and to go back to being friends like we both used to. She respected my decision and now we both have parted our ways,both of us did not talk like we used to now as we both has been really awkward with each other. I graduated from my secondary school last year and moved to a new environment where I could start a fresh. Unlike jas,I actually didn't tell my new friends that I have used to dating girls as I was afraid that I was being judge by others. I have been telling myself recently that I am straight and I like boys,not girls. I really hope I could do well and fit into the normal people.
Honestly we shouldn't judge or like discriminate .we should just respect them .love is just love, doesn't really matter about gender so I hope we could just give them space lah
Kudos to Zula team! Great to see this episode in my feeds! I have tons of respect for Jes, you are so brave to share your experience with all and even willingly respond and accept DMs from those who needed some help. The LGBTQ+ and all minorities have suffered alot of discrimination. What I personally wish for is for all parents and family members to accept their loved ones as who they are. there are things that are really wrong e.g. killing lives, inflicting hurt on others etc, but sexual preference / sexuality does not exactly fall into right and wrong spheres. We have ethics and beliefs to uphold, but when it comes to an individual's sexuality, one should respect the individual's preference as long as he/she does not hurt himself/herself nor do they inflict hurt on others, I think that is good enough.
Thank you Jes for your story, u are so brave and so admirable! You are on for bigger and greater things in the future! 💪🏻
hi jes thank you for doing this, you have no idea how nice it is to hear your story 💜
thank you for sharing your story with us jes. you're really strong and came this far, i wish you only happiness from now on. keep doing and being you! you deserve your own happiness and lots of love ❤️
ps. everyone is beautiful uniquely in their own way, don't let the typical stereotypes define who you are
Don’t know Jes personally but hey! I really appreciate that you are being honest and open to share your stories.
And I’m pretty sure that there will be more people (even though there’s like a lot right now but I mean... the more the merrier right?) who will hop on the bandwagon and be accepting and welcoming to people who are coming out in the years to come! 😄
You did great Jes! I have family members whom we love for being brilliant individuals just like you. Keep on creating content and being yourself. There’s no right or wrong in your case, it is living life to the fullest and love will conquer all. Jiayou, jiayou, jiayou!
thank you so much for sharing this :””) must have been really tough, very very proud of u ❤️
This is a great topic! Jes is really making a difference to other people’s life! Kudos to Jes
This made me cry. Kudos to you for your journey
Dear Jes, I am not sure if you gonna see this. I would not normally sit down in front of my computer and not skip the videos that I'm watching but I did not skipped this particular video, first and of all I am sorry that you had a tough time coming out to your family. Don't be afraid to be the real you, I am a mother of 4 kids and I will always be proud of them no matter their sexual orientation, I want my kids to be able to reached out to me about everything. Stay strong and be HAPPY! Take care and greetings from the US!
Although singapore is a very great country, I have to admit that this country is still very stereotypical and living in this country myself, i see alot of people being quick to judge and would not accept the way someone is. I hope that every single singaporean can have the chance to see another person up close who is a trans- gender/black/white/coloured/gay/etc and finally see the bigger picture and finally see that we are all human and to treat each other better. However, we must all admit that singaporeans are slowly recognising that there are people like this and instead of shaming them, we are extendind them our helping hand.Remember this, don't ever fall in love with your gender, fall in love with your person that you deserve. God bless Singapore god bless yall🇸🇬🇸🇬🇸🇬
I'm so happy to know there is many other LGBTQ people in Singapore. Honestly, majority of the people around me are hetero but my friends were very accepting of my sexuality. But it really nice to see others out there. Thank you for sharing your story
Jes, I m a mother too.
What is so wrong to love your own gender, not that u commit a crime.
Stand strong and ##&*@ your relatives
I feel so sorry for what you had to go through. LGBTQ+ people deserve to be loved too! I never understood people who were so opposed to LGBT relationships because ultimately, it has nothing to do with you in any way shape or form.
I am overjoyed for you Jes, thank you for sharing your story, I don't feel so alone now.
Jes, you are so loved and yassss i love you sis!! Proud of you and continue to believe in yourself! 🥰🥰🥰
love jes. she is so attractive in and out. proud of her!
This is such an inspiring story :') I can relate to Jes very much! You go do your thing!!
Everyone should have a friend like Mavis. The world will be a better place. I remember a quote from a public speaker which goes:
"Being gay can be influenced. Good luck with that."
Yes, love yourself, come out or not, be proud of who you are ☺️💕
she is so strong, thank you for sharing your story
Just want to put this out here:
Never ever put the blame unto someone who decides to come out for the better of their mind and soul / NEVER push someone to come out when they are still searching themselves.
Even when you’re currently unable to accept what they are telling you about their choices, NEVER EVER make it their fault.
I would say, they are born this way and it already take them quite some time to finally find themselves what makes them happy so if you add on the reasons for them NOT to come out or accept themselves, what kind of outcome do you want after that?
People have ended their lives because of the negativities towards LGBTQ+ and thinking it’s their fault or they’re wrong.
I love the LGBTQ+ community ❤️🧡💛💚💙💜 🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️
i’m in love with my straight best friend and i’m still pretty closeted
watching this vid really helps boost my confidence and courage to be proud of myself in singapore and find it in me to one day let my family know who i really am
you’re so brave, sending all my love and support to you. ❤️
Thank you for be real and I totally respected you for being who you are.
thanks Jes for sharing your stories and thanks Zula for this video 🥰🙏 I have so many LGBT friends and I just wanna let y'all know that I'm always here for you guys!!!!
You’re so brave!! Keep it up and always be yourself. Love yourself!
So happy for this episode! Thank you Jes
Wow, Jes, listening to you is really inspiring. I think its not just for the LBGTQ+ community also for interracial relationships too. Not many parents can take it too...
Can see the pain in your eyes when speaking about your family. , Sincerely wish u happiness and things will definitely gets better & easier. ❤️🧡💛💚💙💜
This kind of content will save so many lives. Keep it up guys.
Great content! Keep up the good work! Thanks for sharing Jes!
watching jes gives me motivation to tell my parents too
Thank you Jes for sharing, thank you for being there... Hopefully there will be a time that theres no need for anyone to talk about LGBTQ... Hopefully it will be just the norm where LGBTQ is just like anyone falling in love with anyone being together with anyone each one wants to...
Hi Team Zula, I'm enjoying the content and I think it'll be great if you guys could consider uploading these as podcasts too :)
Is the Mavis that Jes mentioned referring to Brenda's Mavis!!?? 🙃
Didn't want to tear up while watching this but i failed.. Hahaha! Too relatable when it comes to parents and family members who aren't as accepting as what we thought they'd be. Thank you for representing us LGBTQ+ on here and sharing your story Jes! I personally am only out to friends(and mom) but not my family or relatives and i agree, it's tough to do it especially if there's no "plan b" if anything bad happens.
Finally this episode waiting forever