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How I Discovered I Like Boys
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- Опубліковано 1 вер 2021
- Hi All, I think we all have had that moment in our lives that lets us know immediately what we are into. My moment was definitely memorable and fascinating. I thought it would be a great idea to share my story and I hope you enjoy this video.
E-Mail: richiewestie@gmail.com
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I am now approaching 80 and I remember always "liking boys". Have married one and we are extremely happy together. It gets better.
Respect i totally relate to you xx
Y'all ain't married. Just pretending. Imagine being 80 amd not having overcome being ghey. Sad
Bro, so many people can relate. I’m 42, masculine, and am still closeted to some degree. Being a police officer in northern Mississippi I pretty much have to be. Just about everything you experienced, I did too and still do to a point. The only real difference I think I can say is my “rebellion” was me being very introverted. I made decent grades in school, but hated being there. I had no friends there and didn’t want any there. I had a couple buddies that lived down the street that I hung out with, but I never told them about my feelings. I also had guys at school that I looked at, but never said a word. When I became old enough to work I started working to have an outlet other than being so introverted. Even then, all I wanted to do was work as many hours as I could and hang out with those people because they were more mature. I’m proud to say that I finally came out at the age of 24 to a female paramedic that I worked with on the ambulance. I was a paramedic before I became a cop. She was an older lesbian and I would frequently go to the gay bar (primarily lesbians though) with her. I always just told her that I tagged along as her straight friend. We worked 24 hour shifts together at the fire department, so I became close friends with her and finally came out for the first time. Talk about a weight lifted!! But there has still been more weight ever since. I’ve been with my partner for the past 7 years now, but in my current profession I haven’t come out. I never discuss my home life at work and I’ve been at my current agency for 4 years now, so I think the guys might suspect, but they don’t ask and I don’t talk about it. I’ve told many more people (even some cops at my last agency), so I know the info is out there, but there still is that little bit of closet. I’ve learned to just live my life with my partner, but I still find myself to be a homebody rather than going out with friends all the time. Probably still that introvert in me sticking around. My partner makes me get out at times though, so we balance each other’s personalities well.
Thank you for sharing your story. Made me feel good. And I hope that mine somehow helps you as well. I promise you that you are helping lots of people your age and younger. And through younger guys like yourself, you’re helping us older guys see just how much progress has been made of the past few decades. You’re awesome, brother!! ❤️❤️❤️
I knew a prison guard who was so not closeted fellow I can honestly say that I love him still from his ability to give me words of encouragement during a very rough time in Fed prison.
I agree 110%❤️. I had that exact experience that Richie had of riding a motorcycle with an older guy who was a friend of my older brother’s. I was 13 at the time and I already knew I was very different by the time I was 7, though I didn’t have any noticeable effeminate characteristics. But, it sucked to have to pretend I was interested in girls when I knew I was more interested in boys.
My brother was five years older and had friends that were pretty nice to me because they all knew my brother to be an asshole older brother though they were friends with him. But, I had honors classes and skipped the eighth grade, so I was relatively accepted by many of the older crowd as an equal. When I was in the 10th grade, I continued the honors classes that had a lot of high school seniors in them, and so many of them loved hanging out with me and so we became very good friends. They always saw to it that I was included in on any Senior skip events, beach days and parties. One of those guys later told me that he had a crush on me way back then but was too afraid to say anything.
To Richie- I must have had about 8 major crushes on other guys at that age and trying to hide it was a bitch. It felt like multiple breakups and would plunge me into a depression every time. I didn’t have anybody I could tell about it or talk to that could relate so I would say my life and personality was bifurcated from that point forward. That’s why now that I’m an adult and old enough to make a difference, I create safe places for kids to be themselves and opportunities for them to express themselves! I never say it’s okay to do this or that since they’re under age and have parent to help them make those decisions. But, I do what I can to help bridge that communication gap between teen and parent! 🌞🌴❤️❤️
Been there done that. Retired law enforcement. Been with my partner 23 years. He was so supportive during my career. I too was closeted. At my retirement ceremony, I had him there and praised him for his support and understanding. Some people were surprised, some were not, and some knew him (Friends on the force who knew us as a couple). He was always disappointed that I didn’t take him to police functions. The “Policeman’s Ball” as he puts it. Lol.
Awesome story. It made feel like just getting one night stands were not for me. Once in high school I met a guy that turned out to be my best friend. We did a lot of experimental things sexual and I realized that we were made for each other. Sadly he passed away after a serious bout with cancer. I will always remember him and all the great times we had together.
I can relate to you let's meet up and get to know each other
So sorry!💙🙏zane
I sometimes wonder how many young offenders in juvenile detention were at a stage of 'acting out' but weren't fortunate enough to make that "turnaround" before it got to that point, because they simply didn't have anyone they felt comfortable enough around to support them or help them figure stuff out. Just a little encouragement can make a huge difference. Troubled kids are basically invisible until they snap, then suddenly they get this whirlwind of negative attention from the authorities. It really irks me when they charge kids as adults, wtf?
Glad you made it out safe and sound. 🥂
. . . you are a natural storyteller . . . appreciated the listen . . . medicine for my Soul . . . tks . . .
Hi there,
It was interesting to hear you talk about how your confusion as a 12 yr old lead you into being an angsty rebellious kid.
So glad that within a couple of years you were able to resolve those issues and turn your life around 'Ritchie'. Lots don't ever come to terms with themselves.
Excellent!
Take care, hey.
Thank you for telling us all about how you were feeling during that period in your life.
You tell your story in a very down to earth way, and I'm pretty sure that a lot of guys could relate to what you said.
Especially the part about your wanting to "fit in" with the majority of others around your age.
Young folks are bombarded with all manner of contradictory slogans/ messages; some that say
"Just be yourself", hmph! yeah right!
Puberty can be a fairly confusing time for a lot of boys, and I think that by telling everyone about how you were feeling
during your younger years, will almost certainly make a lot of young guys feel a lot less uncomfortable and alone.
That was so very relatable. It somehow does a soul good to know that they are not alone - and others had the same experience. Thanks for sharing.
Very good presentation. I weep for you and I am happy for you. What a strange mix. To this day I have never been able to tell my story. I wish I had someone who could listen without judging me harshly. Good for you Richie. Good for you!!!
Tell it here. Tell it in a blog. It is good to put memories in writing. It helps to clarify your thoughts and feelings. 😊👍
Thank you for sharing, it was really honest. Most kids get through a rebellious phase at that age, but that "park crew" part gave me goosebumps... You could have gotten hurt in very bad ways.
Been loving your channel for a while. You always seem so calm and older for age. Not 62 old but more down to earth.
Wow Richie.......... So yeah, first off thanks for sharing this with us. Very open, and honest video.
All those feelings at the young age, and trying to sort through them and deal with them. And being from a small town............ I totally understand.
No one to talk to about it, not wanting to be found out, or stand out.............. Yeah. Brings back so many memories.
Sorry you had issues with the law, but glad you found your way out of it. Turned things around, and moved on and up............... I think you've turned out pretty damn good.
Now the guys at the park....... after school........ Yeah that brings a few thoughts to mind. Don't think they was just there to socialize.
Even small town..... They was most likely dealing, or looking........... Indiscreetly I'm sure but....... Still. Red Flag.
Love how you always bring up so many good issues, and topics....... Keep it going Richie.
I can relate to your story, as I didn't come out until age 19. I missed all those opportunities you spoke about at the end, and it makes me sad, but we're all on the path we're on for a reason. Thanks for sharing your story! :)
That’s not even bad at all.. some men keep themselves closeted til they’re in their 50s or 60s and completely miss out on being gay during their best years… I feel so sad for them, honestly.
Hey buddy - thanks for the genuine reflections about your life’s early revelations about discovering who you are. Honestly, it made my mind remember my earliest stirrings about my own preferences than ran contrary to the norms of the small town I grew up in Ohio. Your story of the sexy bike rider reminded me of an older, athletic guy whose company I was thrust into when we went on a long bus ride for some Boy Scout trip. Through pure happenstance he got seated next to me and became my “buddy” for the duration, just so all the kids were paired up with someone. He was very friendly and also treated me like an equal and not a little kid. I can remember being quite taken aback by him, but not having a clue as to why. I only remember wanting to hold onto his arm and snuggle. This has to have been like my late preteen years. I’d long since forgotten the experience, but your story reminded me of his and my feelings, which had to be my very first feelings of attraction toward a guy. It may have just been his “big man on campus” vibe within our troop of kids rather than any actual sexual feelings, given what a late bloomer I was. But now I wonder if there wasn’t more to my feelings than I’ve considered looking back on it. Something to think about. Thanks for your story and I look forward to more of your content! Be safe. 🤓
This was quite the couch session & definitely feel you revealed a different side. Now Im thinking about motorcycle stud & wonder how he turned out 😉🏍️
Awww, I only hugged one guy. This was a really sweet story
Richie...thanks for your share. I watch you a lot, but don't really say things to you that I think. I'll try to do that more. I love your channel and your helpful advice. Take care.
Love your story telling
I've watched a few of your videos tonight and you're a great storyteller Ritchie. I'm older than you are. I was a 70s kid and like you I discovered I liked guys when puberty started hitting me hard when I was 12. I was a small town boy (500 people in the whole town) and a parochial school kid attending the local Lutheran School. I never felt bad about my feelings or guilty because I knew I was hard wired that way. After I got a little older and reflected back, I realized I had hard feelings towards boys going back to elementary school. Everyone's experiences are different. If you'd care to hear I'll comment about my first boyfriend in 8th grade after I started public school. Hint: that year he was state champion for his weight class in wrestling. ❤❤❤❤. Love to you sir.
What kid didn’t go through a rebellious stage at that age? The “park crew” is different, never heard that before…and a bit creepy. Thanks for sharing Richie. 🤗
👏👏👍 thanks Richie! That was a great story,glad to hear I was the only one who did that too. When you came out how were you treated? When a so called friend sold me out I was disowned, so what did I do? I was like to he__ with everyone I started focusing on myself and my love for agriculture went to school for animal husbandry,no didn't finish short on cash, and have worked hard for what I have. Yep my first crush was a baseball player and he was very nice to me we had lots fun together until his untimely death.
Thanks for sharing.
Richie, your wonderfully told tale of you on the motorcycle reminds me of a fantastic coming of age (foreign) film called North Sea Texas. I highly recommend that you check that film out! (This was a really good video of yours, btw. )
I love ❤️ the film North Sea Texas!
So do I, Francisco! Wonderful film with a memorable motorcycle scene!
This sounds like something that could be made into a sweet ,wholesome coming of age film. And the bond you
two shared seemed to me at least like that of really close brothers.
Also: QAF US version - Yearning "yearning is when you want something really badly, like so bad it hurts"
ruffles hair and give hugs
A movie would be great. I thought the very same thing...
Very nice video. Thank you for having the valor to talk about your feelings at such a young age.
Great story Richie. I had a similar experience with a senior in high school when I was 12. Now to be clear, this was not a sexual relationship btw. It was like I was being ‘seen’ for the first time. He was the star quarterback of the school, staggeringly handsome, and really nice to me. We would meet behind the gymnasium after school as I had to stay and wait for my older sister to have cheerleading practice.
As I write this, I know it may sound like I was being groomed for something more, but, nothing like that ever happened. His name was Wade Rush and died in a car accident at the age of 21. 6’4, 220lbs, and just seemed to have a light behind his eyes. I grew up and was always attracted to this ‘type’ of man. Then, one day, I realized that I subconsciously had always wanted to BE like Wade. Once I realized that I WAS, in fact, very similar to Wade, I no longer had a ‘type’. I was then more attracted to specific men, not based on appearance, but, to other qualities, such as a nice smile, a twinkle in their eyes, or smart AND funny. I would have missed out on so much if I had only dated men based on their appearance. So, by getting right with myself allowed me to see the beauty of men that I might never have noticed before. Wade will always be my first Love.
When I was 14 I saw Sam Elliott in the movie Lifeguard, that's when I knew!
The most important words that Richie said: "I'm grateful for the life that I live now." He learned to accept and overcome the challenges, didn't expect life to be perfect and made it over the hump. (I couldn't resist.) Everyone has the ability to do that. Sometimes we are taught the opposite and become convinced of it. All those of you facing the same challenges as Richie, find your way to a good life. It may require you to work so hard to find the right path, and it's possible some other people will help you, while some put obstacles in your way over and over again. However, it's your unique and special life you're dealing with, not theirs. Persevere.
Thank you so much Richie for your candor and sharing your (actually) beautiful story! This may very well help other closeted guys and closeted girls to overcome their guilt / hidden feelings.
You are so easy to listen to. Nice life experiences, the good and the not so good.
Have to say that you are just great, the pain and the uncertainly that you were feeling is part of the growing up and accepting that you are a wonderful person and Gay, you will move on and discover better persons and better things
Wonderful story. I am happy for you. Smart young man.
Thanks for sharing that defining experience .. sorry he came and disappeared as quickly .. still think you're amazing!
The feelings you describe when you held on to him for the bike ride, happen to many of us, and some young people can't deal with that too well. So we delve into different forbidden things, and often can lead a teen to suicide, but your story can only help those who watch it. I hope many questioning teens, can view it.
Richie, a lot of people go thru that same thing, only they don't get over it. first, at the age of 13, the hormones are running your life. You're one of the few that make it thru it. BTW, I live in the Eastern part of Maryland. You have said that you're from the Western part. I think you said somewhere near Cumberland.
Im actually from Western Maryland.
@@RichieWest Yea. What I was trying to say as a fellow Marylander, our state is small enough to go from the beach (Ocean City) to Deep Creek in less than 8 hours. not many states can say that.
Richie you’re precious.Love and admire you from Brazil.
ua-cam.com/video/5QqMQNPy2LU/v-deo.html
You speak so cultured and eloquently. I can listen to you at lenght, whatever the topic.
Richie, you are articulate, smart and beautiful. We will be successful in finding a boyfriend.
You are a very special person.❣
56 years old here. I really enjoyed your story. You reminded me of when I was a boy. Thank you for posting this.
I believe that you have spoken directly to a lot of young guys who are going through the same problems and you have given them hope.
I know everyone’s story is different. I’m happy you had the courage to come out while in high school. I waited a few years until I was in a local college, and met my first boyfriend. He was a bit older than me, so I was hesitant to let him meet any family or friends. He began taking me to local gay nightclubs, which I fell in love with immediately. I felt like I was in high school again, finally being allowed to be myself. I grew the courage to tell my 2 best friends. My boyfriend discouraged me fearing I might lose them. But I was just as shocked when I confessed to them, and then found out they were a couple hiding in plain sight. They had never gone to a gay nightclub before, and suddenly the 4 of us were going out frequently. That is until my parents, being suspicious cornered me and forced me to come out. It wasn’t good. They gave me 30 minutes to pack, leave my house and car keys on the table, and GO. I was in shock, my boy friend was in shock, my friends were in shock. I suddenly was living out of a suitcase, my boyfriend didn’t like this new live in situation. We soon parted ways and I had to start my life, again. I had many ups and downs. My folks eventually came around. I dated guys who I was unhappy with. Along the way I buried 2 of them which made me feel I’d never find anyone. I stopped going out as much. One night I found myself at Tiffany’s, daydreaming. I felt a tap on my shoulder, I turned around to face a taller, darker, handsome guy with a moustache. He held out his hand to introduce himself. He asked me to join him for drinks. We had fun that night. 4 nights later he called to invite me to dinner, “anyplace I’d like to go”. A year later I asked for a commitment. He said he couldn’t do that. I was crushed, but said goodbye. A week later he called asking to see me. He took me to dinner and was a little teary. He asked me to forgive him and said he’d give me what I asked for. 2 years later we moved in together. He’d told his roommates it was time for everyone to move on so we could begin our life together. We ended up with an empty house, but the love we had made up for it. My folks took us on a cruise for our 10th anniversary. It was a fun trip. The 4 of us together, and staying at the Eden Roc for a week after. We eventually had to move for his career. My folks weren’t happy, but they understood after they visited us the first time. My mom said she knew we had made the right decision. They are both gone now. After we sold their home, we donated a chunk of the selling price to the homeless gay shelter in our city. It seemed right after what I’d gone through. Next month will be our 31st anniversary. We got married along the way, and still can’t figure how the time flew. I think I love him more now than ever before. I always remember what he said with tears in his eyes the night he asked me to take him back, “John, I just want you to be happy”. He’s done that everyday for over 30 years. I know it can work out for all of you out there who doubt yourselves, or have family who turn on you. It really DOES get better.
I think I was about 10 when I knew, bur I didn't come out until I was 23 years old, thanks for sharing you handsome man
You're a terrific speaker who's very articulate & well spoken...and you've got a terrific smile as well...btw my first time watching! Loved it!
Thank you!
Loved your story 💓
Wonderful story.
Thanks for listening
BEEN THERE DONE THAT RICHIE!!! I've had a crush OR TWO in my day!!!!!!!! It's so true what U aid, LOOKING BACK YOU'LL SEE THAT GOD HAS A PLAN---U might not see it BUT B PATIENT, RIGHT? HAVE A GOOD ONE!!!!! YOUR #1 FAN, Tom NYC
This made me sad. I'm glad you changed for the better. I wish I could be myself.
You are such a sweetheart, and we share some similar situations.Thank you for your stories.
You story brings back many memories for me. Here I am close to the "jumping off" point of my life and I can relate to you and your experience with the motorcycle ride. I feel, today, that my experiences during my teen years brought me to a point where I was confident with seduction and making love -- not just sex; but making love. There is a difference and it should be explored. My first kiss happened when I was 14; my first total encounter happened when I was 15. My first love affair was the summer of 1961. And it is engraved in my heart forever. For me, there was no COMING OUT. I landed square in the middle of Gay Life and never looked back. I even took the time to make up for some of the "losses" I had when I was young. LOL LOL Now after 31 years of marriage, I'm fortunate to have someone who really cares. And I know my time on Earth will have been worth it!
I think youth is emphasized because youth is the time of discovery and decision making for life in a way. Youth is also wrinkle free! This video is so real!
Hi Ritchie....I have like boys since I was 13 in 1967, you are so lucky you had a Dad like you did!!!!...its men like you who help many young men...you are the best!
Happy I can help 😊
You did well and we are all on a journey...
A really open blog about your feelings. We can all relate. So reflective! TY
What a wonderful, touching story! BTW: Good lord, you are sooo adorable!
Great story buddy,and hope you have a great week :) :)
I loved the video, Richie! I can totally relate, too, buddy. I feel like my thoughts for boys happened in 5th grade when I just REALLY liked my best friend. And somewhere around that time I realized that I liked him as more than a friend.
Hope you are doing well!
Thank You for sharing. Coming Out stories are so helpful for everyone. You spoke about it so genuinely with honesty from your heart and perspective. Stay Strong, Be Well, Keep Safe, Keep Rockin brother!!
Hey, just discovered your channel! I had a story kind of similar to yours. When I discovered I was not straight ( lol) was in my middle school. I was in 8th grade I believe and there was this new kid that came to school actually in the last few months of 7th grade the year before. Anyway, I didn't really take full notice of him until 8th grade. I can recall whenever he was around ( he went to a few of my classes) I would always feel weird and nervous around him. It wasn't like a bad or negative nervousness but in a positive ( if that makes sense). Anyway, I remember in Spanish class ( I arrived early and was waiting for class to start) I was the only one in there until he came in!! We finally got to have a full conversation and surprisingly he knew who I was. In middle school sometimes people knew me before I knew them lol. Anyway as we were talking I mentioned to him somewhere along the that most of the time I had no one to hangout with and he invited me to come hang out with his friends if I wanted. I can recall being happy to do this ( even though I really wanted to be near him) and I remember going home and thinking him a lot. Just like you mentioned in your video I didn't know what I was feeling but it felt very weird and I kept telling myself basically I'm not gay, I don't think he's cute and it's just a friend crush or something. Anyway, I got to hang with his friends a few times but he was the only one that really talked to me. Other than that I was just tagging along and was ignored basically. After that we kinda stopped talking and I wasn't hanging around him and his friends anymore. After that I noticed that I seem to be noticing guys more ( if you know what I mean) but I kept saying to myself I'm not gay and if I'm bi like people say I have a better chance at being normal and not liking guys. Fast forward till now I have to say it got harder to suppress and I ended accidentally outing myself to my mom and now my parents know ( grandma and mom) so I don't have to worry too much about hiding. However my siblings don't know yet. Anyway, I just wanted to say your video helped me in a way and while I am still coming to terms with my sexuality I can still find times when I feel lost, confused and scared
Then at other times I Feel confident in my sexuality and it's not a problem. I just hope that one day I can fully come to terms and feel comfortable with who I am sexually. I just get annoyed sometimes and worry what will become of me and my future since I am gay. Will I go to hell, will I find someone, will I be successful, etc. Anyway, I hope I am making sense here and sorry for the long message. Just wanted to know if you had some advice that could maybe help? Also, what you said at the end of the video was like an eye opener. Thanks for the that, I needed to hear it as well as don't question Gods judgement.
DJ-- what a beautiful essay. As an older gay man, allow me to answer your questions and provide some life lessons.
1) No, you are not going to Hell. If you are gay, you are simply fulfilling how God made you. The only "sin" is if you treat people like objects and USE them for sex or your own selfish wishes without taking their needs into consideration.
2) You will be as successful at anything you put your mind to. Focus on getting educated, then devoting your knowledge, skill, time and ambition to whatever you want to do.
3) Will you ever meet a loving partner, who loves and treats you well as you do him? Well, yes, hopefully. But it may be a challenge. You may need to move to a different place. The Internet has made it much easier to meet fellow gays than before there was the Internet (when I was growing up). You must expect to get your heart broken a few times. Love is hard -- whether you are straight or gay. Do not expect to find love through a series of one-night stands. Hooking up may give you momentary pleasure, but it is (usually) not the path to love. Select your partners wisely, and don't let anyone use you, abuse you, or take you for granted. To love someone who loves you back is one of life's great joys. Good luck! 😁👍❤
@@markmh835 Thank you Soo much mark for your advice! I will take heed to this
@@djvinylgoblin -- Anytime DJ. I wish I had had someone to advise me when I was growing up and coming to terms with being gay. Instead, I had to deal with the HIV/AIDS crisis when I became sexual. Fortunately I stayed negative, because I knew how to protect myself. It's hard to believe we are still dealing with HIV in the 2020s. That would be like still coping with COVID19 in the 2060s. 😲😱😵👎
@@rayderosa6014 Sorry can't say. Don't like saying my age much
Hope things are better for you
I always remember looking at the guys in that way. I can remember as early as eight years old.
Wonderfully courageous and encouraging. Many youths go through that period ofn trying to figure out and understand and accept who they are, so thank you for sharing.
Thank you for sharing your story.
Hey, I'm from Maryland. My mother raised me, never knew my dad well. I never had game though
I'm from Maryland
so honest...thank you
Thanks for sharing such a personal story! You are so awesome! Peace and love to you!
Very proud of you!!! You Rock Richie 🤩
Realised I liked guys when I was 8. 😲
You’re from Arizona, it touches me when you say you were rebellious when you were running away from your sadness and feelings.
Really enjoyed listening to your story! I know you’re a genuine guy!❤
You could find the motocycle man. You are old enough now to do it. So, find him.
I just love how you tell the life story's that happened 😊😊😊
Hello richie west and how your day going and what is your opinion about onlyfans chageing there own mind about banning adult content in october 1 and are you going to try and move to a different platform like fansly just in case if onlyfans decide to change there own mind again in the future
Richie, you always do a great video. Just being yourself is the trick.
Seems the algorithm is bringing a lot of people to you who want advice, kindred spirit, kind voice or even someone we know is a friend even if you never meet. I think we all forget just how many friends each of us have in this world.
Good for you! You seem like a really great person!
Such a cute story 🥲 hope everything works out for you
I'm 68 years old but you did a very very nice job explaining your feelings
I was just under 4, when I kissed my cousin. He was 12. After my mother and father divorced, I never saw him again. Bless you, for your story.
Good for you young man...you are no doubt helping other young gays come to grips with who they are.
That sounds so much like myself when I was 12 years old. I'm in my 50's now and those was just my enjoyable and favoritable experiences in my life.
Great video, Richie. You are one terrific speaker. Bravo!
I am surprised at how much I like this video. Very sincere
Thank u soo much for sharing this with us! I most def can relate from ur past experiences!
You have inspired a chapter in my novel, where my mm MCs will ride pillion on a plough horse. Thank you for your insights.
Yes, my moment was at 9, when i got a piggy back ride from a school friend.
Hi Richie.Iistening to your story . lovely
Perspective from the way back machine - c. 1980: you might have known in 6th grade, been sure in 7th, but there was no way in hell you were going to share that with ANYONE until you got out of town and away at college. And even at that, you'd picked the school carefully ('why do you want to go to a City, University of Bucolic is so pretty') to make sure there was at least a decent chance of finding kindred souls. So for 5 years and a little beyond you constructed a fiction, and it worked well enough (fortunately for many sexuality is flexible when you're full of hormones and you can make it with a girl, who you might actually like, just not really want the same way). Ah, but those rare motorcycles rides, the kid you met on a ski trip, at the hotel with the away team - treasured memories. Totally get the escapism though - I was honor role all the way and won an academic scholarship to a top school, but drank like a fish.
Sounds like a great movie. I loved your story. Haha. Mine is similar.
I remember some early brushes with other guys that i should have acted on. I feel like I was a snob for ignoring them. Regrets about missed connections because of my ignorance. It still hurts Richie. 😔
Do you enjoy cuddles and long hugs? I love my wife and enjoy our relationship and all it entails. However, I long for hugs and cuddles and intimate moments with guys. I am warmed deep in my heart when a guy of any age takes an interest in me. Not especially necessarily in a sexual way but just a closer and deeper friendship than most guys. Anyone else feel this way. I am definitely attracted to both sexes, but I just don’t feel like I get enough cuddling and hugs and playful wrestling like I did in my youth. I miss it!!!
Good video man , sad people still feel the societal need to not be there true selves, you like guys thats fine, it,s no issue, or it should'nt be in 2021 get on with your life, society moves forward , be yourself !
Good video. Open up my eyes to see what I have been doing
I like the way you keep things very very simple.
I started liking boys when I was in grade school around 7th grade, I didn't know about gay back then ,but I had feelings for guys and I couldn't stop looking at some, in high school I got out of gym because I couldn't keep my eyes off guys in the locker room ,I got a doctirs note for nerves
Thanks for your honest sharing. I wish I had come to terms with my true sexual attractions when I was young. Instead I tried to be someone I wasn't and failed miserably at it. Now at 56 and never having an adult relationship I am just sad, scared, and alone. I desperately want a special friend not even sexual but more as a companion. Finding a partner at my age is extremely difficult but if it is to be it will be. Anyway thanks.
Hi Nadim Nadim
Greetings from Paris.
I am glad you turned around. You will have to do a video later on it
interesting insight to your life and who you are NOW....tks
It was not easy to open up being gay. All the thing he say was related to my situation. I’m noticing I’m like boys more than I like girls when I’m 13 years old. It’s was quite difficult at first to coming out and thanks to God now my family accepts who I am. 😁😁😁
You had me once the motorcycle showed up. I loved riding, loved bikes, road bikes like fast, sporty 750s. I loved long rides, like a trip from Atlanta to Canada, loved a trim leather jacket. That smell turned me on; fun to wear to bed. I had quite a few bikes over the years. But the roles were reversed. I was up front. In back was the guy with arms around my waist. Great to feel him there, his hands clasped in front, near my crotch. It all felt so right...
I'm glad that you're true to yourself my friend that is the only way to be true to yourself and why hide
Parents divorced, no behavior issues, NEW Normal, ok well adjusted 👍 Real friends are very special!
One of the most extreme, heavy, things I experienced in my life was a 12 yr. old boy, in 6th grade who really liked me and I him. He resembled me a little, and really liked that, along with other things we had in common. For nearly a year prior, was very social, would watch me with curiosity and longing, and was very into me and cool. He and his friend one day really turned on me, and he said hi to me in this exaggerated, teasing, melodic-feminine voice, then started whispering and giggling to his friend. They kept watching me, intensely, but cruelly. Weeks later I said to him and his friend they could get in trouble for saying cruel things about me (calling me gay, in love with....) and that I'd report it. The boy that liked me, and I him, became super sad for days. One kid told me how sad this kid became... how he couldn't play in gym or play football at recess. I told him, that the kid that liked me, had issues, and he was projecting his issues on to me, by spreading rumors/making fun of me, which took the focus off of him and put it on me, making it look like I had all the issues. This other kid likely told him, and he unliked over 50 photos of mine on social media right after. Days passed and this kid walked around miserably, afraid to look at me. I felt awful so I finally confronted him. I said I wanted to let it all go. He started to cry. He said, "What would I say bad about you? The gay thing? Well, what's wrong with that?" I said, "Well, it's not a nice thing to say." I should have said, there is nothing wrong with being gay... you just don't go around spreading rumors and teasing people that you think they are gay. Instead, the kid was so miserable still. I talked with him later in class and said, "you're breaking my heart, can you tell me why you are so sad?" He snapped, "What do you care?" He added, "It's just that I don't get to see you everyday." I told him that he was one of my favorites and that I remember all the compliments he gave me. He smiled a little, but then was sad all over. 2 days after, March 11, 2020, school shut down for good due to Covid. It never got resolved. I tried so hard via social media to do the right thing, and show I cared. I was blocked by him. He posted a photo on another friends account of himself, imitating me in one of my photos, my expression, exact styling of my hair, in a revengeful/mocking way. A friend of mine said, it's like he wanted to be me, yet make fun of me more as he was hurt. One of his friends wrote me, "I'm sure he'll forgive you... eventually." But he never explained what I would be forgiven for.... what horrible thing did I do? The secret was never revealed. I was blocked by him and most of his friends... only 3 remain. His mom was very mean to me on the phone. I think, I was this kid's first love and he assumed I rejected him and was homophobic. The police were involved and I was forced to leave the school forever and after 2 yrs. still got no resolution over it. One of the worst, heaviest things of my life. Betrayed and abandoned by everyone from the school and parents. It's THE thing more than anything I wish I could go back and do things right, or at least some day, somehow get some resolution and reconciliation. There's not a day that goes by that I don't hate myself for what happened. I've never been hated by so many people of so many different ages.
Thank you for sharing this heartfelt story of yours with me. I know it may be hard but you have to trust that everything will come full circle one day. Try to only learn from the lessons that the experience taught you so you don’t have to go through that again. I support you 😊
@@RichieWest Thank you. I appreciate your kind words. Indeed, I just repeated today, the errors I made. I've tried reaching out to others thinking they'd help... but they didn't want to help me or the situation. I even approached him weeks back, and he just walked right by and his mom lashed out at me.... even after 2 yrs had passed. I sure hope, one day there will be good to come.