My teachers knew I'd been sexually abused so they attributed all the symptoms to that

TW: cult torture survivor. When I was a teen in high school my teachers knew that I had been sexually abused as a child by my great uncle so they attributed all the symptoms I was showing to that. What they didn't know that I was that I was still being tortured and ráped by my parents and other cult members every day and night. I couldn't tell them. I was too terrified to; I was living with my abusers, I'd seen them murder other kids and they told me they would kill me if I talked, and they'd increased the torture since my disclosure. I also dissociated from what was happening and other parts of me took over and they knew that we couldn't tell and still be safe. I wish I had had enough safety to tell and I wish that people had been more educated about cult torture. I showed symptoms in so many ways, from walking facing the wall so people wouldn't touch me or walking sideways or jumping at touch, to being so shy and scared that people could barely hear what I said in class, to dissociating in class or trembling as memories came at me, to curling up in a ball from the trauma memories, and more. I did have two incredibly supportive teachers, my English teacher and my history teacher and they helped. And I read The Courage To hHeal by Ellen Bass and Laura Davis and took it with me everywhere. It was a support. #cultsurvivor #traumatok #didsystem #ramcoa #dissociation