24:55 After I had my baby, within a couple of days I started having the most deranged thoughts. ‘Invasive’ doesn’t even cover it. I started thinking ‘What if I accidentally sat on the baby? What if I stood on them? WHAT IF I ACCIDENTALLY DROPPED HER OUT IF THE WINDOW?’ (I was five floors up). All I could see was the awful, vivid, images of awful things happening. I called my mother and asked “What’s wrong with me? Why can’t I stop picturing all these awful things happening?” because I felt shame, guilt and fear. I had no idea what was going on. She just said “Welcome to being a parent” (she was next to useless. When I called her the day after the baby was born, sobbing because I’d read all the books and thought I knew it all but knew NOTHING and couldn’t successfully breast feed or get the baby to keep a feed down or get them to let me put them down without crying, she just said ‘Well it just sounds like you wish you hadn’t had her.’ which wasn’t true and just sent me into a guilt and shame spiral.) It was only twenty years later that I learned about intrusive thoughts and new parent anxiety, and that it’s awful but it’s perfectly normal. It doesn’t mean you’re ‘wishing it’, it doesn’t mean you’re a bad parent, it’s borne out of fear and anxiety and worrying that you’ll somehow mess up. That baby is almost 23 now and I still worry every time they leave the house. It gets easier, but you always worry. Just know that if it happens to you, although it’s frightening, it doesn’t make you a bad parent or mean that you will harm them. You’ll regain your confidence and you’ll find your way, I promise. Talk to someone - your health visitor, a friend who has children, don’t let the guilt keep you from sharing. You’ll get through it. ❤
Just found these videos and am binge watching
Uh oh, get ready to be hooked!!! 😊
sameeee
Sameeeeeeeeeee
I love these videos 🎉
24:55 After I had my baby, within a couple of days I started having the most deranged thoughts. ‘Invasive’ doesn’t even cover it. I started thinking ‘What if I accidentally sat on the baby? What if I stood on them? WHAT IF I ACCIDENTALLY DROPPED HER OUT IF THE WINDOW?’ (I was five floors up). All I could see was the awful, vivid, images of awful things happening. I called my mother and asked “What’s wrong with me? Why can’t I stop picturing all these awful things happening?” because I felt shame, guilt and fear. I had no idea what was going on. She just said “Welcome to being a parent” (she was next to useless. When I called her the day after the baby was born, sobbing because I’d read all the books and thought I knew it all but knew NOTHING and couldn’t successfully breast feed or get the baby to keep a feed down or get them to let me put them down without crying, she just said ‘Well it just sounds like you wish you hadn’t had her.’ which wasn’t true and just sent me into a guilt and shame spiral.)
It was only twenty years later that I learned about intrusive thoughts and new parent anxiety, and that it’s awful but it’s perfectly normal. It doesn’t mean you’re ‘wishing it’, it doesn’t mean you’re a bad parent, it’s borne out of fear and anxiety and worrying that you’ll somehow mess up.
That baby is almost 23 now and I still worry every time they leave the house. It gets easier, but you always worry.
Just know that if it happens to you, although it’s frightening, it doesn’t make you a bad parent or mean that you will harm them. You’ll regain your confidence and you’ll find your way, I promise. Talk to someone - your health visitor, a friend who has children, don’t let the guilt keep you from sharing.
You’ll get through it. ❤
Thank you so much! You do an amazing job❤🎉
First! I just wanted to say I love these videos so much.
I'm curious what the second is
24:15