Limmy's Improv Stories: Glasgow Uni Student on Work Experience at the Barras

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  • @adudefromtheukvideos
    @adudefromtheukvideos 5 років тому +1968

    Hey Limmy - I’m just 3 months into a 600 year prison sentence for the cannibalistic murder of 87 women and children, so as you can imagine I’m a bit down in the dumps - these videos are a real treat, helping me forget my troubles. Thanks and all the best x

    • @Scott_Raynor
      @Scott_Raynor 5 років тому +385

      stay strong mate you'll be out soon

    • @quantumblurrr
      @quantumblurrr 5 років тому +184

      Stay true to yourself ignore the haters they’re just jealous x

    • @robertmartin4555
      @robertmartin4555 5 років тому +85

      You'll pull through, I'm sure it was all just a misunderstanding

    • @chrisscott7990
      @chrisscott7990 5 років тому +47

      Hopefully an endorsement from limmy will show people our life choices aren't something to be ashamed of.

    • @urgumskurgum7570
      @urgumskurgum7570 5 років тому +30

      Do you know where i can get some steak ?

  • @mt2oo8
    @mt2oo8 5 років тому +260

    Unreal how invested I was in this story. Just zonked out picturing it aw out

  • @BIGJAMES026
    @BIGJAMES026 4 роки тому +179

    My name is Jamesy Johnstone and I absolutely shat myself when you said my name staring into the depths of my soul

    • @scumbad7953
      @scumbad7953 3 роки тому +26

      But you look like a Peter.

  • @KirbyMario12345_939
    @KirbyMario12345_939 5 років тому +402

    That intimidating angry guy voice is comedy gold.

    • @Sadpanda82
      @Sadpanda82 4 роки тому +1

      Aye, that's pretty standard for Scots.

    • @urthofthenewsun8465
      @urthofthenewsun8465 4 роки тому +23

      I love how he whisper shouts because his wean and the missus are probably asleep

    • @Elcore
      @Elcore 9 місяців тому

      Laugh a minute when yer on the receiving end ay it selling steaks in the Barras.

  • @Darthox200
    @Darthox200 4 роки тому +255

    “We’re corrupt as fuck”
    This is the best sentence I’ve heard a person say

    • @G2020-
      @G2020- 3 роки тому +9

      You need to get out more then, Craig.

    • @kirstymcintee8162
      @kirstymcintee8162 3 роки тому +2

      I kno man hehe

    • @pimposki6232
      @pimposki6232 2 роки тому +2

      @@kirstymcintee8162 "hehe" is the best possible spelling for this
      "hehe im corrupt as fuck man hehehehe"

  • @pitchwife7573
    @pitchwife7573 5 років тому +335

    pissing myself why does it always end up so violent

  • @baisteescruncher
    @baisteescruncher 5 років тому +503

    So weird but me and my wife were shagging there with our usual UA-cam playlist of shagging tunes and this video randomly came on the sequence. Even weirder we both just ploughed on. I was watching this whilst rattling her up the Miller and Carter (I.e Farter) and we were both just laughing away. Thanks

    • @rutter89
      @rutter89 5 років тому +26

      This comment man 😂

    • @Etcher
      @Etcher 5 років тому +2

      This comment is better than the video!

    • @cartmanofsp
      @cartmanofsp 5 років тому

      Hahahahaha

    • @bajsbrev4651
      @bajsbrev4651 5 років тому +7

      Is it the playlist "tunes for when burst"? Those are some BANGING 80s tune m8.

    • @jamamafegan4382
      @jamamafegan4382 5 років тому

      Hahahahahahaha

  • @yuudoooo
    @yuudoooo 5 років тому +217

    "great on a plate" you just can't teach that

  • @Jonathan-pg2hd
    @Jonathan-pg2hd 4 роки тому +113

    “Jenksy was right about you lot man” - barras salesmen

  • @majalis7010
    @majalis7010 4 роки тому +149

    asmr roleplay: you’re getting strangled for using the word “sate” in the barras

    • @Jamie-yr9be
      @Jamie-yr9be 6 місяців тому +1

      That was my favourite part, it reminded me of Ivor Cutler's "The Shapely Balloon" when the shopkeeper goes ballistic after hearing the word "assuage"

  • @sleepcyclesgaming
    @sleepcyclesgaming 5 років тому +195

    used to buy games in the barras from a guy. he'd walkie talkie a lad and he'd appear with CDs for the ps1. great times.

    • @avlpe7662
      @avlpe7662 5 років тому +9

      What about Amiga disks before that, did you ever get them there..!??

    • @aluskn
      @aluskn 3 роки тому +11

      @@avlpe7662 Not in the Barras, I'm from Manchester, but this brings back memories of me as a 13 year old travelling 30 minutes on a bus to Cheetham Hill to meet up with an older lad, hand over a fiver and get passed a brown shipping envelope full of 3.5" disks loaded with ST and Amiga Warez compilations from groups like Automation and Fairlight, good times :)

  • @zanaris-xu5fr
    @zanaris-xu5fr 3 роки тому +29

    "I CANT BREATHE!!!!"
    [Terrifying Presence] "coz im fucking killing ye."

  • @PeroxideQueenie
    @PeroxideQueenie 5 років тому +216

    Think this is my favourite one, I like an uplifting story.

  • @WritingOnGames
    @WritingOnGames 5 років тому +335

    Was worried Craig wouldn't be involved for a minute there.

  • @scottyoung1161
    @scottyoung1161 5 років тому +312

    Why didn’t The Barra’s Human Resources Department get involved in this managerial harassment?

    • @Etcher
      @Etcher 5 років тому +28

      That's what I was wondering. Surely there is strict procedural protocol to handle this kind of situation in the Barras.

    • @scottinbristol
      @scottinbristol 5 років тому +57

      @@Etcher There is, a fuckin chokin'

    • @jjammmees
      @jjammmees 3 роки тому +5

      because they’re corrupt as fuck

    • @craigfromscotland5272
      @craigfromscotland5272 3 роки тому

      @@Etcher plot twist: they are the HR department tae 😂

    • @alibrown6268
      @alibrown6268 2 роки тому

      🤣🤣🤣

  • @jackmiller1324
    @jackmiller1324 5 років тому +162

    These emotions feel too real. Feel like this is some life experience comming out here

    • @scottinbristol
      @scottinbristol 5 років тому +24

      There's personal tragedy in all good comedy

    • @kdmedia1534
      @kdmedia1534 3 роки тому +3

      Nah Limmy’s just that good.

  • @captainbeachboy3413
    @captainbeachboy3413 5 років тому +151

    even the polis dinnae like a grass

  • @mmc11512
    @mmc11512 5 років тому +183

    Limmy nails these stereotypes to a tee. Craig then drops out after spending too much time at underground art school parties drinking hooch, gets a job at the politics bar and evolves into Malcolm Malcolm by his 30s.

  • @MarqueeDeSade
    @MarqueeDeSade 5 років тому +108

    "Your appetite it will sate"

  • @roisinmc7442
    @roisinmc7442 3 роки тому +31

    I always remember when I was in first year in Glasgow Uni, just arrived from Northern Ireland and someone told me to go to the barras one weekend. There was a jakey guy trying to sell 1 shoe and a wee van selling "sea food" that smelt really off and was stinking the whole place out. Was a baptism of fire. Bought a load of pirate cds, happy days 🤣

  • @FunnyAngeli
    @FunnyAngeli 3 роки тому +46

    i like to hold my breath everytime the kid gets choked out to really immerse myself in the story cheers !

  • @Brickkzz
    @Brickkzz 5 років тому +87

    Top ASMR channel

  • @brooscaredya
    @brooscaredya 5 років тому +93

    This happens to me everytime i go to the barras.

    • @agsrd4496
      @agsrd4496 4 роки тому +4

      Diz it aye

    • @brooscaredya
      @brooscaredya 4 роки тому +3

      @@agsrd4496 no I was lyin

    • @agsrd4496
      @agsrd4496 4 роки тому +7

      @@brooscaredya
      Wir ye aye

  • @BeatPoet67
    @BeatPoet67 4 роки тому +35

    "the shops look shite..." Tears.

  • @reidreid2280
    @reidreid2280 5 років тому +44

    "you're jenks now" that was so wholesome

  • @newdawnfades5725
    @newdawnfades5725 4 роки тому +69

    idk why but the thought of elon musk travelling all the way to Glasgow just to hear Craig speak has me in hysterics

  • @bennyblanco9602
    @bennyblanco9602 5 років тому +210

    16 glasgow uni students disliked this

    • @agsrd4496
      @agsrd4496 4 роки тому +3

      Did they aye

    • @zinodali1334
      @zinodali1334 3 роки тому +2

      You a long way from the Bronx benny

  • @AlexnicholasBlakely
    @AlexnicholasBlakely 4 роки тому +133

    Would be incredible if someone animated these haha

  • @tommaddi
    @tommaddi 3 роки тому +17

    This is Limmy's crowning achievement.

  • @scrimmybingus4871
    @scrimmybingus4871 3 роки тому +8

    Skyrim court wizard: "I'm sendin' yu t' the barras"

  • @Uppers101
    @Uppers101 5 років тому +17

    Limmy, this is your finest work to date. Amazing.

  • @philipe1502
    @philipe1502 5 років тому +12

    the void noise in these videos are really the cherry on top

  • @hauntedgamingpc
    @hauntedgamingpc Рік тому +11

    this and parasite 2019 are constantly fighting for dominance over who is the better classism commentary in my head

  • @Hutchie2112
    @Hutchie2112 5 років тому +26

    Spot on with that vinegar and sickly sweet smell description, it cracked me up as I instantly remembered it, and flashbacked to digging about for cheap singles (records!) on a sunday. I wonder what that smell was, but I dareny think about it too much.

    • @MrOllivie
      @MrOllivie 4 роки тому +9

      It's the brewery man, the brewery mixed with the old river industry. The combination smells toxic

  • @christywhiteman4249
    @christywhiteman4249 5 років тому +15

    So happy you posted some again. Really helps when my life is in the toilet. Appreciate you Limmy.

  • @pwdplastering2120
    @pwdplastering2120 5 років тому +30

    That Mr Jenks has worked everywhere btw (also in the Reunion Improv), gotta love a recurring character Limmy #doubleplusgood

  • @sohaibnk
    @sohaibnk 5 років тому +14

    I lost it at the bit where the cops go ''we're corrupt as fuck here mate...'' hahaha

  • @MarcusMandible
    @MarcusMandible 5 років тому +67

    "Always felt that I look like a Peter"

  • @ClaireyG100
    @ClaireyG100 5 років тому +31

    As soon you hear “let the story commence” then you know you’re in for a ride 😂

  • @ajsctech8249
    @ajsctech8249 3 роки тому +9

    "The shops look shite". The best line in this story

  • @ultimok
    @ultimok 5 років тому +51

    Hey!! Stop that...or I'll be telling Twitter. 🤣🤣

  • @adam-wq9ew
    @adam-wq9ew 5 років тому +39

    this is the most jarring ASMR video i’ve seen

  • @Sun-Eater616
    @Sun-Eater616 5 років тому +158

    This is very problematic

    • @Etcher
      @Etcher 5 років тому +11

      Only if you're Craig

    • @88omair
      @88omair 5 років тому +20

      What's the ploblem?

  • @ASMRMuzz
    @ASMRMuzz 5 років тому +166

    Fkn Craig man, ah hate that khunt.

  • @jambutty2218
    @jambutty2218 3 роки тому +7

    This is the third time I’ve listened to this story an it gets better every time.

  • @mrtandemslidessbtt
    @mrtandemslidessbtt 5 років тому +37

    You know you’re Scottish when the title alone makes you laugh 😂😂

  • @Soki7000
    @Soki7000 5 років тому +70

    Started laughing just at the title.

  • @kriswingo5905
    @kriswingo5905 3 роки тому +14

    For about 10 minutes, I thought he was talking about selling STICKS. Imagining the uni student with a pile of twigs he's gotta sell.

    • @amp4105
      @amp4105 2 роки тому

      @Marty McK most def

  • @alanreid3175
    @alanreid3175 5 років тому +33

    A steak that tastes great on a plate mate 😂

  • @pootpoot13
    @pootpoot13 2 роки тому +5

    This is tremendous. I genuinely haven't laughed so much at a comedian for years.

  • @NekitGallus
    @NekitGallus 4 місяці тому

    This story is a strong lesson in humility, flexibility, and the real challenges of business. It shows that true business skill isn't just about book knowledge or big ideas, but about understanding and handling different situations, dealing with tough people, and making the best of hard times.
    Craig's story is a clear reminder of the difference between school learning and real-world application. It emphasizes the need for adaptability, hands-on experience, and the ability to navigate various and tough environments in business.The hard lessons Craig learns at the Barrows could be very valuable in his future, making him a more complete and resilient person.

  • @riceboybebop7018
    @riceboybebop7018 3 роки тому +6

    Mary didnt know John's name for the 10 years they were together until they both met Craig

  • @Cairo_666
    @Cairo_666 3 роки тому +5

    This should really be a movie.

  • @intello8953
    @intello8953 2 роки тому +3

    Still one of my fav Limmy improve stories

  • @spaceship_00
    @spaceship_00 5 років тому +6

    Limmy the Story Genius, always a joy too watch dude....

  • @craynosis
    @craynosis 5 років тому +61

    I love goin tae the barras

  • @frostieuk3064
    @frostieuk3064 3 роки тому +2

    I cannot believe this free to watch, it is AMAZING, PURE GLESGA xxx

  • @joshdr45
    @joshdr45 5 років тому +40

    Benny Harvey rip

  • @cartmanofsp
    @cartmanofsp 4 роки тому +3

    Back for my weekly viewing of this masterpiece

  • @BennTheGamer
    @BennTheGamer 4 роки тому +9

    Didnt know Limmy was playing Begbie in Trainspotting 3 following the cancellation of Robert Carlyle

  • @nickriches4641
    @nickriches4641 5 років тому +5

    Best improv story you've ever done

  • @bloodhound9638
    @bloodhound9638 3 роки тому +4

    This is my current favorite story, i go through stages where im addicted to the one story, keep the laughs coming in this fucked up world, Legend

    • @peterbett3076
      @peterbett3076 2 роки тому

      Why is it one of your favourites? My favourites if I had to choose are ‘dodgy cookie’ and ‘facebook friend only, doesn’t really like him’, although there’s so many others which are also genius, too many to mention.
      I think this one, which you’d expect from the title to be perfect class dynamics material for Limmy, loses its way and gets bogged down in the social politics. In my view he falls into this trap too often, even now as a more accomplished story teller. Most often, but not always, with the independence/scottish vs english source material.

    • @jackglossop4859
      @jackglossop4859 Рік тому +1

      I’ve watched every improv story he’s done but I return to this one for the full 25 minutes every now and then. It’s pure joy.

  • @klawpse
    @klawpse 4 роки тому +24

    I watch this every night it's a perfect bedtime story for adults.

  • @G2020-
    @G2020- 5 років тому +26

    Watch Mr Glasgows videos on here they are absolutely hilarious showing small clips of the characters past and present in the barras.

  • @tyredmechanic290
    @tyredmechanic290 3 роки тому +8

    I want a spin-off story about Jamesie Johnston

  • @mankyscotchgit4986
    @mankyscotchgit4986 5 років тому +10

    'Mary, do people know what 'rate' means?'

  • @conor1814
    @conor1814 5 років тому +9

    The barras guy is Gary Barton aka mr Glasgow on UA-cam

  • @BP_Psychology
    @BP_Psychology 4 роки тому +4

    this is my favorite video on youtube

  • @LEMCproductions
    @LEMCproductions 3 роки тому +4

    the glasgow uni accent gets me everytime

  • @sevendaughters
    @sevendaughters 10 місяців тому +2

    I'm a lecturer and I got the job by becoming rich and then losing it all. Now my life is full of Craigs.

  • @iangpark
    @iangpark 3 роки тому +4

    that ending was fit for a black mirror episode

  • @SomethingVeryGeneric
    @SomethingVeryGeneric 5 років тому +6

    After that story, I feel as though we are all Jenks now

  • @nolikeygsomnipresence270
    @nolikeygsomnipresence270 2 місяці тому

    Limmy, this is glorious. Thank you.

  • @MIKE-TYTHON
    @MIKE-TYTHON 2 роки тому +2

    17:00 this is just so good it’s honestly wasted on a random improv vid on UA-cam. 😂

  • @MoonThuli
    @MoonThuli 3 роки тому +12

    15:35 had me in tears

    • @threegenders201
      @threegenders201 Рік тому +1

      Especially as I imagined it being some old lady 😂

  • @theziggyh
    @theziggyh 5 років тому +15

    “I’ll ram ma fookin steak thru yar hart”

  • @douglasadam5253
    @douglasadam5253 5 років тому +8

    That was different class. Came across too many to mention like Craig.

  • @scottcrawford8755
    @scottcrawford8755 2 роки тому +4

    "am no oan the internet a don't gee a fuck" 🤣🤣🤣🤣

  • @tomjones6347
    @tomjones6347 2 роки тому +1

    I've been here a few times... This is the best improv.

  • @ingylu
    @ingylu 5 років тому +3

    i can't stop staring at that flick of hair on limmy's crown

  • @Scott_Raynor
    @Scott_Raynor 5 років тому +6

    Great story. Shocking ending.

  • @willmckellar7542
    @willmckellar7542 5 років тому +11

    I think the Mary character could be developed further. Currently she seems very two dimensional, but I feel she has more to offer, possibly as a sub or meta narrator across the whole or the Limmy cannon.

  • @banefulness
    @banefulness 5 років тому +3

    You are a fantastic fucking storyteller. I was right there in the shitty auction stall in the Barras with you.

  • @jakeescott
    @jakeescott 2 роки тому +2

    Might be the best one, certainly my favourite from the old fella.

  • @teejaymack5839
    @teejaymack5839 5 років тому +3

    Super enjoyed that just waiting on the first bus on shift to arrive so I can go busking maybe a story about buskers would be cool

  • @jonescrusher1
    @jonescrusher1 4 роки тому +8

    I want more Jamesy Johnston.

  • @aiden2083
    @aiden2083 2 роки тому +7

    Love me some hand fed corn fed Argentinian kobe steaks from Japan

  • @MIKE-TYTHON
    @MIKE-TYTHON 2 роки тому +1

    What a masterpiece of performance art this is.

  • @elizabethkierere5806
    @elizabethkierere5806 4 роки тому +3

    I don't care what anyone says, I'm attending this man's streams.

  • @emlyndewar
    @emlyndewar 4 роки тому +1

    The is the most inspirational story I've ever heard.

  • @ЮлияСуходоева-л6о
    @ЮлияСуходоева-л6о 5 років тому +1

    The best story I've heard!

  • @donaldbrechin8170
    @donaldbrechin8170 5 років тому +11

    23:20 . burst into laughter

  • @cukeumberr
    @cukeumberr Рік тому

    ending fucking sent me. could only dream of being this good at improv

  • @newwave6404
    @newwave6404 4 роки тому +1

    I’m fucking addicted to watching these fucking stories man. Don’t know what I’m going to do once I’ve seen them all........ Maybe I’ll sell some steaks or something 🤔

  • @potatoefacedfox
    @potatoefacedfox 3 роки тому +4

    you know that cliché where the old fart is too out of it to realise he's reciting the plot of a tv show he saw?

  • @leedobson
    @leedobson Рік тому +1

    The barras guy would be played by Robert Carlisle, Craig by a young Alan Cummings

  • @roo407
    @roo407 4 роки тому +3

    24:51 is that wee look that gets me man

  • @YOYO-mx6ie
    @YOYO-mx6ie 5 років тому +3

    Carwardic priesthill very on limmy.
    I guess limmy lives in a lovely part of Glasgow now. Cool 😁

  • @fancypants1
    @fancypants1 4 роки тому +1

    This is your finest story

  • @fionaflorissax
    @fionaflorissax 5 років тому +7

    Fav incarnation of craig