I still remember this anti joke this guy I knew from jr high and high school told me "what's green and on wheels? Grass I lied about the wheels" RIP Adrian, that is seared into my brain
Fun fact: the most famous anti-joke is "Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side." This is also arguably the most famous joke of any joke genre.
2:47 1. take out the batteries of the remote, typically two or four. 2. Find any cable, recommended to find a tv cable or power cable. 3. Remove copper wires from power cable. 4. Twist copper wires into a double helix that has two prongs on either end 5. Tape the middle of the helix with electrical tape. 6. Use magnets to attach one battery to two adajcent prongs. 7. Now you have a homemade taser that only works when it touches human skin because humans have a slightly negative electrical charge😊👍
I feel like "Why did Jimmy drop his ice cream? Cuz he was hit by a bus" is a terrible example of an anti-joke. It's literally just an actual joke, just a dark one. No wonder the guy who gave the example deleted their account
@@codymarshall587that was their example of an anti joke though? Their example of something that wasn't an anti joke was Jimmy just dropping the ice cream.
Tbf, in the story, the mouth of the guy is only taken away after he kills everyone else and is punished by AM. Idk about the video game, though. The cool thing about the ending is that the phrase "I have no mouth but I must scream" can also apply to AM, who has his own eternal suffering. And in the end he does the worst thing possible to the narrator, which is to make the narrator like himself. But it kind of backfires on AM, because he can now no longer listen to the narrator scream, which was his only source of joy in his strange imitation of life.
An anti-joke is a joke without a punchline. That's it. That's all it is. Everything else is just people explaining why they find anti-jokes to be funny.
3:40 Can’t agree more with the “take your wins where you can get them” part. I nearly lost an eye to a retractable metal pole with a spring that was way stronger than it had any right to be. Instead, I just had to get stitches, and now I get to tell people about the worst Christmas of my life.
That "why is 6 afraid of 7" joke reminded me of this one Supernatural quote. I don't even remember the context, but Castiel just says "why is 6 afraid of 7? I assume it's because 7 is a prime number and prime numbers can be intimidating" and its been fucking seared into the wrinkles of my brain ever since I saw a screen grab of it on tumblr in middle school and thought it was the funniest shit ever.
i think my favourite type of anti-joke is the ones that the punchline is a really long story that is funny but it's being told as a serious answer to the question
3:40 You reminded me of a story when I worked at a movie theater. Some dipstick started the popcorn popper with the lid wide open, and me and my coworker only found out when we heard the kernels spitting out of the popper and smacking into the metal walls. We ran in and got it closed, but as the dust settled, my coworker suddenly panic swiped at their right ear. A kernel coated in hot oil had somehow ricocheted off the wall and lodged itself behind their earlobe. They got a pretty nasty burn from that one.
I only worked in a kitchen for like 3 months and I have several oil burns that had nothing to do with me doing anything wrong. Mostly just people not paying attention and smacking me with bacon pans and whatnot.
Reminds me of when my niece would say, “Why did the chicken cross the road when the stop light was green?” “Idk why” “Because they painted it that way” Huh😂
I Have No Voice But I Must Screamed in one sentence "A super-duper computer decided to take the last five humans and make them immortal so he can mess with them."
Because courage is not a rhyme for orange, and while porridge is a near-rhyme, near-rhymes are not typically considered to be rhymes when discussing whether or not a word has any rhymes.
@WishGender neither are most rap words ? The point of rhyming is to jump from first part of the word to the last that builds into something else while simultaneously creating another sentence that connects to the 1st 2nd to last . You can even ask ai on words that rhyme with orange and that checks out. I'll be honest most rappers fail needling it in. Think of it as like your knitting a sweater.
“There are only two days left!” Meanwhile, I’m here, watching the video two days after it’s been uploaded. I’d be sad, but I’ve already got enough definitely-not-flesh receptacles to drink from, so, I’m chilling as long as no one searches the suspicious cabinet in my cabinet.
Teacher: “Everyone named Michael, please sit down!”
Kid named James: 🧍
That actually made me laugh the first time i heard it 😭
@@MeanGPT YOUR CRINGEEE!!11111!
Hello James here
EVERY ELEPHANT IN THE SAFARI START DANCING!!!!
Zebras:
@@drpepperenjoyerr
I was watching a video earlier where they translate jokes from their native language literally and one of them was "What's worse than wind? Vampires."
what video did this happen to be? i am quite interested..
“translating French jokes word for word so it doesn’t make sense” by cibu
Why the hell did this make me laugh
Directly translated jokes are prime anti-joke stuff. Written to be funny, but never translating in a way that makes sense.
My farts are better than Kwite’s farts
A horse walks into a bar.
A guy walks out of the bar.
- bar that turns horses into guys
My farts are better than Kwite’s farts
…Oh.
The bartender returns the horse to the guy
@@p-__damn they’re better then kwites too
I still remember this anti joke this guy I knew from jr high and high school told me "what's green and on wheels? Grass I lied about the wheels" RIP Adrian, that is seared into my brain
Did bro die ??? 😭
i remember that one being told on game grumps as well
@@Breadknees_ yee
Oh, RIP funny joke guy@@LooseGoose463
@@LooseGoose463 rip anti joke guy
anti-joker: why so humorous?
My farts are better than Kwite’s farts
I don't believe you
ant-joker: nothing because ants can’t speak
PJSK FAN SPOTTED IN THE WILD!?!?!?!
The jokeman: what do you call a alligator that is a detective
Can’t wait for the disembodied manic voice to whisper sweet nothings into my ruined ears as it coaxes me into my final rest
🥰🥰🥰
That's a mood lol
5:00 No, that starts with 't' and ends with 'hat'
no, it starts with an “i” and ends with “t”
No, "no, that" starts with "n" & ends with "o, that"
@@crocosnake2761 Incorrect. "No, no, that" starts with "n" & ends with "o, no that"
@@monoteozin "No." That ends with "o, no that. "
What.
I thought the title says 'joke antis' and was thinking who tf is anti-joke? What did the jokes do to you? Make you drop the ice cream?
Coincidentally, Jimmy dropped his.
No, the bus did.
They could’ve dropped their croissant
Q: Imagine you are in a room with no doors, no windows, nothing inside, and impenetrable walls on all sides. How do you get out?
A: Stop imagining.
My farts are better than Kwite’s farts
@@p-__ SHUT UP NOW
Now climb out of the hole. You're obstructing roadwork.
@@TheLordVictor Roadwork ahead UH YEAH I SURE HOPE IT DOES
Uploaded twice in one day like a good boy
Are you good bro
Bro?
@@memelord74 by what metric do we measure
@@TheTransTankie if we’re asking that i can assume the answer is no
In the course of 24 hours yes but in what we would call a day, no.
“Yes Kwite.” We all say simultaneously.
kwite needs a second pair of glasses so he can take off a pair and still have glasses on
Fun fact: the most famous anti-joke is "Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side." This is also arguably the most famous joke of any joke genre.
actually i'm pretty sure "the other side" is a play on the afterlife. it's a joke disguised as an anti-joke! :)
@@boop7354 wait thats genius
6:53 the fact that r/antjokes is a subreddit is probably the funniest joke
2:47
1. take out the batteries of the remote, typically two or four.
2. Find any cable, recommended to find a tv cable or power cable.
3. Remove copper wires from power cable.
4. Twist copper wires into a double helix that has two prongs on either end
5. Tape the middle of the helix with electrical tape.
6. Use magnets to attach one battery to two adajcent prongs.
7. Now you have a homemade taser that only works when it touches human skin because humans have a slightly negative electrical charge😊👍
I feel like "Why did Jimmy drop his ice cream? Cuz he was hit by a bus" is a terrible example of an anti-joke. It's literally just an actual joke, just a dark one. No wonder the guy who gave the example deleted their account
Well, they came to the conclusion it wasn’t even an anti-joke so??
@@codymarshall587that was their example of an anti joke though? Their example of something that wasn't an anti joke was Jimmy just dropping the ice cream.
7:48 this gives the same vibes as a "why can't helen keller drive? because she's a woman" which one of my friends told to a chaperone on a school trip
Ah yes, I have no mouth and I must scream, my favorite video game where the guy has a mouth
Tbf, in the story, the mouth of the guy is only taken away after he kills everyone else and is punished by AM. Idk about the video game, though. The cool thing about the ending is that the phrase "I have no mouth but I must scream" can also apply to AM, who has his own eternal suffering. And in the end he does the worst thing possible to the narrator, which is to make the narrator like himself. But it kind of backfires on AM, because he can now no longer listen to the narrator scream, which was his only source of joy in his strange imitation of life.
holy yap @kze24
An anti-joke is a joke without a punchline. That's it. That's all it is. Everything else is just people explaining why they find anti-jokes to be funny.
Does an implied punchline count?
implied punchline: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9
"What did the badmington say to the goodmington"
2:03 HE HAS LEGS!!!! 😭😭😭😭
He just attached some pants to the bottom of the hoodie. Obviously.
Non-cannon episode
This is a prequel
beautiful profile picture of someone who's hopefully live a long life❤
Why did the chicken cross the road?
It didn't, but the deer did & it got stuck in headlights
2 men walk into a bar.
The third one ducks.
This is the OG Anti-joke, never fails
Oh fuck yea whata up dude
What up, son?
@@Mooman380 What up, daughter?
what up, nephew?
What up, homunculus?
What up, skinwalker?
4:58 no, "that" starts with a "T"and ends in "hat".
Kwite, I was having a really rough time today, and this video dropped right in the middle of it to help break me out of it. Thanks man.
I love men.
Real- also I love your user lmfao
yoooooo sameee
Fr
Same
Same starting in about 4years
0:29 kitty cat spotted
3:40 Can’t agree more with the “take your wins where you can get them” part. I nearly lost an eye to a retractable metal pole with a spring that was way stronger than it had any right to be. Instead, I just had to get stitches, and now I get to tell people about the worst Christmas of my life.
That "why is 6 afraid of 7" joke reminded me of this one Supernatural quote. I don't even remember the context, but Castiel just says "why is 6 afraid of 7? I assume it's because 7 is a prime number and prime numbers can be intimidating" and its been fucking seared into the wrinkles of my brain ever since I saw a screen grab of it on tumblr in middle school and thought it was the funniest shit ever.
I’m not sure if this made me smarter or dumber. It just made me.
Cacoons
It made you er
Two videos in less than 24 hours is crazy. Oh wait it’s December nvm get that bag!
What's brown and sticky? A stick
Me.
@Fandom_Surfer lol
Shit
@@DefinetlyNotACrocodile What did Billy do when the Crocodile said a swear word?
tell his mom
ITS GETTIN STICKYYY1!!1!1!1!1!1!1👅👅👅👅👅🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏
My God, Kwite, I am so pleased I’m not the only one who thought of “I Have No Mouth and I Must Scream” at 12:10. Also, it’s depressing af
2:14
"マスクされた"
"Masuku sareta" which translates to "Masked"
What's green and has four wheels?
:grass I lied about the wheels
I'll see myself out.
The most diverse friend group(depending on the people) probably also makes the most racist jokes to each other 11:42
damn, dudes really on his grind w this upload schedule
As a massive Batman fan, Kwite dropping his knowledge on the different Robins, absolutely made my day!
5:00 no, that starts with a t and ends with hat.
i think my favourite type of anti-joke is the ones that the punchline is a really long story that is funny but it's being told as a serious answer to the question
The lack of money for me to buy kwite collab merch is depressing me ngl
3:40 You reminded me of a story when I worked at a movie theater. Some dipstick started the popcorn popper with the lid wide open, and me and my coworker only found out when we heard the kernels spitting out of the popper and smacking into the metal walls. We ran in and got it closed, but as the dust settled, my coworker suddenly panic swiped at their right ear. A kernel coated in hot oil had somehow ricocheted off the wall and lodged itself behind their earlobe. They got a pretty nasty burn from that one.
Dude you going nuts with the amount of videos recently
This upload schedule is so fire
7:13 that batman & robin tangent was so unexpectedly hilarious lmao
Anti-jokes can sometimes be the best jokes.
What is the state of America?
No. America is a nation.
solid, isn't it?
HOW DARE youtube hide this from me for 15 minutes
You my sir, are very lucky. The grease went INTO my mom's eye. She's been half-blind ever since
A guy walks into a bar
And after stumbling around for a bit rubbing his head he walks under it
“I am short and bounce back and forth on-” crazy way to start a video kwite that did not go where I was thinking it would lol
Kwite coming up with a doubleheader? I’m here for this.
4:59 no, that starts with a t and ends with hat
The answer is bathos-if the setup doesn’t provide an anticlimax, then it’s not an antijoke
Dude I cannot TELL you how many injuries would have cost me an eye if they were just an inch over
Why did the fly fall off the wall?
Because there was a piano stuck to its leg
10:40 IS THAT A TONY STARK REFERENCE??
jokes aside, im stealing that.
hes so batman
I only worked in a kitchen for like 3 months and I have several oil burns that had nothing to do with me doing anything wrong. Mostly just people not paying attention and smacking me with bacon pans and whatnot.
12:04 i have a mouth and i must not eat
11:59 This is actually a riddle posed by the sphinx in Oedipus Rex, which honestly makes it even funnier as an antijoke.
“Why did the chicken cross the road?”
“Why?”
“Why not?”
this is unbelievably, undeservidly, entertaining, thank you
Babe wake up new kwite video just dropped
1:31 HOLY FUCK IS THAT A LEG???!
Just got to 2:02, damn, LEGS
Why did the chicken cross the road?
…
still waiting in that response
What's big, white, and doesn't fly?
My refrigerator.
Reminds me of when my niece would say,
“Why did the chicken cross the road when the stop light was green?”
“Idk why”
“Because they painted it that way”
Huh😂
Ayo kwite dropping 2 videos in a day
11:14 azerbaijan mentioned🗣️🗣️🗣️
Can't believe UA-cam hid this from me for a whopping 1 second 😔
Kwite: I nearly burned my eye
Also Kwite: My glasses are my physical eyes
Y’know what
Egg
Me when i first played as Kotone:
Mmm yumy
Relatable
STOP TURNING PEOPLE INTO
Stop turning people into
11:10 the UN got together after work for some post-genocide-supporting drinks
Sporange rhymes with orange.
Also get a second pair of sunglasses so you can pull them down so you don’t have to pull down your eyes lol
No. I like seeing his undereyes.
Just copped the hoodie and the shaker this morning
Two Kwite in one day is crazy
Why did the chicken cross the road? Because there weren't any cars.
kwite my parents r making me clean the house to get this hoodie i hope its worth it
12:09 I HAVE NO MOUTH AND I MUST SCREAM MENTIONED 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
Oddly enough, the best way to explain an anti-joke is via the subreddit r/bonehurtingjuice.
I Have No Voice But I Must Screamed in one sentence "A super-duper computer decided to take the last five humans and make them immortal so he can mess with them."
You’re gonna have to cover r/antjokes now thank you
Anti-humor is humor where the answer is something that could be true, but it can still be unexpected.
this hurts my heads what the hell kwite im blaming u for this
yoooooo the hoodie has legs now
This weird gradient guy keeps leaking in my apartment because of you
We're being fed sooo good today
I have committed crimes that I can not atone for
*AKA, BATMAN*
-Kwite (Batman) 2024
10:01 well the dunkin donuts logo and the lesbian flag have the same colors
why did the chicken cross the road?
it looked both ways and saw the car, why did it do that
7:15 I love the random dissension into Robin lore
These jokes made me exhale air.
damn, rent really was due
Not at all an anti joke
on that church joke i somehow interpreted it as "Chich"
I missed the cs somehow and got "hurh"
I got "Chuchu".
Idk why people still doing this blasphemy. Orange has words that rhyme. Orange , porridge, courage , e.e
Blorenge?
Because courage is not a rhyme for orange, and while porridge is a near-rhyme, near-rhymes are not typically considered to be rhymes when discussing whether or not a word has any rhymes.
@WishGender neither are most rap words ? The point of rhyming is to jump from first part of the word to the last that builds into something else while simultaneously creating another sentence that connects to the 1st 2nd to last . You can even ask ai on words that rhyme with orange and that checks out. I'll be honest most rappers fail needling it in. Think of it as like your knitting a sweater.
door hinge
Torange
Woah,
Very early to a kwite upload.
“There are only two days left!”
Meanwhile, I’m here, watching the video two days after it’s been uploaded.
I’d be sad, but I’ve already got enough definitely-not-flesh receptacles to drink from, so, I’m chilling as long as no one searches the suspicious cabinet in my cabinet.
The most classic Auntie joke to ever exist is what Brown and sticky?
A stick