Simply This: The Ultimate Advaita Teaching with Jim Newman:
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- Опубліковано 26 лип 2024
- This is a radical teaching. I don't get it, but then as Jim says there is no me to get it. It cannot be gotten, it just simply is. If you understand this let me know. Part 2: • Pure Advaita with Jim ...
For more about Jim go to: htt://www.Simply-This.com
Look for Alan Steinfeld's new book Making Contact: www.amazon.com/Making-Contact...
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Love this interview. Questions are so innocent, rather than being "I'm the interviewer, so I know everything".
Like Oprah Winfrey.
This is the first time in my life that absolutely Nothing has made the tears stream down my face like this. I hope I don't remember this video at a funeral or something, cos I'll be kicked out the door for inappropriate laughing!!!
Omg I love the interviewer ....absolutely love him!
Thanks Jessica :)
@@newrealities good interview! Thanks for sharing. (Even that there's no one sharing or interviewing or thanking)
So sweet how he is confused ☺️
laughter is happening
Absolutely! Fantastic interview and very funny! ❤
Classic. THE CLASSIC conversation. The perfect pair. Thanks Jim Newman. And thanks Alan for playing your part too - you were so convincing! Well done both of you.
My pleasure
Absolutely stunning interview. Best Jim Newman video nobody has seen yet. The interviewer is spectacular and sharp as a whip. Nobody is going to need to listen to this at least twice more
I LOVE this!!! It doesn't allow me to get on any "conditioned, familiar, comfortable" path or train of thought. It shakes up the known.
+Karin Lease Well said Karen. Ultimately nobody knows. I remember Joseph Cambell saying to Bill Moyers. " Bill what's the source of the energy of this light bulb ? Total mystery " Keep asking the question, " And where does that come from ? Total mystery
Yes perfect, beautiful.
When there is nothing to be known
"Me" is like Santaclaus. It exists as a story and appears as real as long as there is belief. After that, when it is seen through, it stops. There is still a remembrance, but also the knowing that it is an illusion. And there is the knowing that it never was real. Losing the belief in the story of "me" is however harder than seeing through Santaclaus , because this "me" tends to appear not only once a year but every day when we open our eyes, and it has managed to make belief not only that it is real, but that it exists "as us", that we are it (identification). And it poses as everything that happens, by creating the illusion that everything happens to me. So it uses every thought, belief, sensation, feeling to prove its own existence by falsely telling us that all these phenomena are happening to us. Getting rid of this false belief is so weird because it seems that we then lose ourselves as well and not only a belief. Which of course is not true, because there is no real self to lose (as there is no real Santaclaus to lose) because it never really existed in the first place, it came with and as the belief. When this belief in the separate me stops, what is left is only this knowing that cannot be understood because there is no one left to do that. What is left is nothing, apparently happening as everything, which is beyond understanding, control or belief. Only when we really are convinced of the Total falseness of the belief, which is also the Total falseness of the separate me, the me stops. It can happen any moment, but it is not a doing nor can it be done by the me. Any (believe in) doing of the me only reinforces the me. It is the cessation of the illusion of doing and being separate that gets rid of me and separation all together. What is left is pure being, pure happening without any one knowing it. It is completely free and without any concept, agenda or attribute. Totally impersonal being. Which is im-mediate reality without distance.
Hi
Thank you for taking the time to convey that in such an articulate way.
When I smoked DMT, though i couldn't map it in words, this idea was what the general realization was like. I no longer felt distance between everything, it was all appearing together as one, including the body, an utter mystery before your eyes that man made concepts try to make tangible.
Thanks for the explanation 👍
❤️ all words are conceptual. thoughts. pattern. words can never be used to describe "what is not". "what is" can never be described either. any attempt to "know" ANYTHING only maintains the illusion of individual. there is absolutely no thing to do. ❤️
I'm proud of myself by understanding that there is no me to understand this but still understanding this while knowing that there is no one to understand this😎
Yes....
I have NEVER Laughed, so much in my entire life. The guy, asking the questions, was getting so frustrated - Bless!!
Especially over the "Who's on 1st" routine!
🤣
This is hilarious 😂
I dont know why anyone would want to talk to Jim Newman. I think it has to do with paradox. People love them. Its one of those things you hear and assume “wow that must be deep I just dont get it.... yet”. In some cases that is true. Paradox truly does get across something meaningful. Well with Jim there really is a lot not to get. He just rambles on about nothing.
@@JMT34237 But that nothing is everything.
Allen... You are fantastic! I am happy with the way you handled this interview!
One of jims best Interviews, kudos to the Interviewer.
"Nobody's connected with an awareness. Something stops that never happened. The separate sense of I dies." ... wow... there a couple of gems in this interview that have my True Self laughing as it recognizes truth.
I understand this. I had an experience that made me fully conscious of this. These life experiences are essential for our spiritual development but other than that , they aren't real really. This world is a dream.
This is hilarious....but honestly, this is how you feel when you first start diving into spirituality, and these two guys are your two voices in your head 😂😂
Exactly how I feel.
Yeah this is aboslutely so funny. It's like Jim is in some weird video game and he has to convince people of what is so absolutely obvious but nobody gets it.
of course! this is the conflict within and it doesn't matter- universe couldn't care less if you say anything or nothing live or die oh and its unconditional love 😂😂
@@BackroadBender lmao watch Rick and morty season 6 episode 2, you basically described the plot
😂😂😂😂
Hence the Zen Buddhist Masters always say,
_"Those who know don't speak, those who speak don't know"_
Because "this is" ( or "It") is unknowable, hence inexpressible, henceforth unspeakable! Complete, adequate & fulfilled. 🙏🙇♂️🌷🌷
"The 'me' is a reaction to a reaction to a reaction. It cannot be the cause of anything." - Jim Newman
Exactly.
WORDS ARE TRAPS although words are employed to eventually realize that WORDS ARE TRAPs. After the ego dies (unknowing) to a significant degree we realize that we are our or the Universal Eternal Self in our different bodies.
This interviewer has got to be the closest coming to where Jim is "apparently" at. Easy, relaxed, fun. Great interviewing style.
Even after all this apparent time, this is still the best & FUNNIEST nondual interview on the internet...especially the "SANTA & WHO'S ON 1st?" bits...HYSTERICAL!!! 🤣🤣🤣 .... thanks, guys....
Yes I keep enjoying it too. Thanks. And there is something that is also transmitted.
@@newrealities Absolutely. One of the greatest recorded transmissions I’ve ever found - your authentic innocence and curiosity seduced from “Jim” some of his most elegant, clear, hilarious, cutting, beautiful pointers 🙏✨👁❤️🔥🪞
Even though he doesn't exist his name is Alan not Allen.
This is hilarious 😂 I am with him in the frustration he is feeling. The fact they are sitting so close is also very funny especially during what is now covid times!
This is a radical teaching but as Jim says there is no "me" to get it. It cannot be gotten, it just simply is.
The pseudo-advaita is at work when one is trying to tell what this is and what this isn't. There is only the Self in which all manifestations appear-through the medium of time and space.
The ultimate Non-duality is what Jesus was talking about when he said "Me and the Father are One" i.e. he became one with Reality. That is to say, Jesus died and at the same time; was re-born in union with the whole. He said: "Truly, truly, I tell you, no one can see the kingdom of God unless he is born again." He meant when your ego dies, you are born again.
This video is so unique, such clarity from Newman and open-mindedness and genuine curiosity from the interviewer without the desperate need to confirm his own beliefs
Your making quite an assumption.
This is pure gold!!!; Love it!
"By not being able to get it, you get it"❤❤
Exactly.
No, you don’t 😂❤
Now I know why Ramana chose to keep silent (mostly). There is nothing you can say that makes any sense. Language is designed to deal with objects of experience. And this is nothing to do with either.
OMG, you are so funny, you express my exact words, I am so puzzled and at the same time I understand but if there is no I then who understand. Nothing to understand!!! Thank you so much for this interview. ❤️
Truth does not hurt. Rather, it is our resistance to its message that causes pain.
This is hard to 'get' but it comes so close to a deeper sense of knowing that feels familiar, like home or source. It answered a question about my ego, or the diminishing ego, and made me think about the people around me that are trapped on the hamster wheel.. and what it feels like be around people that don't understand why you don't care about 'things' going on in the world or about material things...why you refuse to have attachment to life dramas. In the end, could it be that we come to immerse ourselves in this un-reality? That the experience of emotions is what makes being human a desirable place to come to as a spirit/soul...and part of our spiritual evolution? Or is Jim's understanding the pinnacle of what we should strive for? The garden of unknowable things...wonderful to contemplate.
+Lotus Your comment is the closest of all the comments to my own thoughts. But Jim would say there is no striving.... haha...
+lettykv Right? LOL, he's a tough nut!
+Lotus Very familiar thoughts :) I would say that, yes, we should immerse ourselves as fully as possible in this life. From moment to moment, opening our hearts fully to what is. And in such way, slowly becoming not-separate from life, but one with life. Being continuous flow. That's what meditation is; bridging duality back into nonduality.
"I'm here to die before I die."
I think to get to the source before we naturally get to the source is a big help of not to overestimate (overvalue?) normal life,
but to live life as it was meant to live. :-)
Follow the breadcrumbs and go exactly where they lead you… All pathless paths are valid… ultimately THIS IS and never departs from itself, yet it opens to itself endlessly in so many gorgeous, subtle, intricate ways… each scene is a new revelation ❤️🔥🪞👁✨
There just simply is all this, and it's perfect. All phenomenon are spontaneously expressed in and of infinity. Purpose itself is a need of separateness mind to have definitions for being. All of what is witnessed is just a presentation of how sustainability occurs in this particular density. Density itself is a construct of separateness in order to place boundaries.
We could either get more specific or more broad with all this but either direction is talking about the same one thing that is infinity all ways.
Nothing is needed because we spontaneously survive without much added thought. Will takes effort, spontaneity simply occurs. To need, you must will. That which you find yourself actively involved in (whatever is happening now) is the flow of infinity which is the multiverse being a multiverse. Hunger and satiation simply arises. According to the story or play or movie of reality, conditioning caused expectation, but expectation is an illusion, thus, to expect anything is to take a risk at feeling a certain way. Any way to be is fine, because it's happening. To just Let Go & Flow is to surrender to this forever-ity 😉.
I'm saying all this like I know what I'm talking about... but who knows...? and Who's on first base but who's knowing?
When they tell you there is no message and that they have nothing for you, they mean it.
Right on. The EXPERIENCE of the lack of the sense of self can be quite unsettling as "I" can attest to of course since IT anchors us in the apparent world.
A very interesting conversation of two speakers and listeners with honesty. Love it. It is an impossible conversation. But they both seem to be having a conversation. The yes and no at the same time.
Taoist don't need this. They just be in Tao.
I feel like I can die happy -- after seeing a good portion of "Who's on first" in an advaita video!
No one loves this but love watching
What a brilliant interview! Love you both!
I didn’t expect a spiritual talk can turn into a comedy 😂
Jim Newman's joy and laugh! Loved this interview Alan, thankyou. Thanks also for the Abbott and Costello clip - divine comedy.
We always need a little humor, no matter what we are discussing...:)
good interviewer, open mind
This is very intense and well worth repeating I am certain. Thank you for this that doesnt exist.
+David Ralph LaPointe Pfff .... This whole conversation was conceptual. The subject was nervous. So he relied on authority. There was no investigation. Just absolutes. Bummer!
+meghan42 your opinion is very believable , but there's still a chance that he could be genuine.
This is hilarious, such fun thank you. This guy's right of course but this is hard-core non-dualism. Every now and then I feel the need to venture here...not for long though! I'm going back to the clarity of Rupert Spira et al. I want to have my cake...and eat it 😁
Totally get what you mean. Rupert Spira is kind of saying the same thing and yet he makes far more of a concession to the individual. I would describe him as applied non-duality. Non dual wisdom that people can actually use to make their life better. This is the end of that whole story. the complete death of the person and just the revealing of what this is (and isn't). Both are beautiful and I also yo-yo between the two.
With Rupert, you get all the concession-stands.....:p
@@Johnphilips1234 Have you ever listened to Candice O'Denver? Definitely applied non-duality, & it works! Her tecnique = "Short moments, taken many times, become continuous". You should check out Alan Neachell's chanel here on YT. It's mostly Rupert, but some Candice.
@@Johnphilips1234 exactly
“Whereof one cannot speak, thereof one must be silent.”
Amazing! What a brilliant interview, it is rightly said that these two persons are your two voices in your head 💙🧡
Glad you enjoyed it!
I love this interviewer, what a great energy
Thanks blob
Looks like a SNL skit
except waaaaaaay funnier. seriously in stitches.
Not sure what that means
ua-cam.com/video/kQFKtI6gn9Y/v-deo.html
There is no need for a "meaning", no-thing to "mean" any (thing)....
I don"t know why i find the interaction so funny, it's like the energy of the blond guy, with his wanting to understand, is evoking a different kind of energy from Tim( and is actually stirring up his "seriousness")....😆😆
P-R-I-C-E-L-E-S-S....
Although this is a challenging message, the interviewer was absolutely stunning!!! Well done ❤
Brilliant, i completely resonate with Jim 🥰
Brilliant! I've watched this 3 times - makes me laugh every time "-D
Allen, bless you for being so gentle with this "nothingness" being! The one thing I learned from this whole interview is how gentle we can be with in the present of one's mind....regardless how off and or strange one can be... Thank you Allen for your work!
The only thing this message lacks is that he doesn’t specify that this dissolution of the “l” or ego is happiness itself. What we long for and what we want is what we are already. Happiness is us and truthfully this message misrepresents this and says that nothing matters and what should really be said that there is no-thing in this space or energy we are all in. There this no objectivity that we are is what happiness because there is no conflict, no dualism. And this doesn’t need to be proved because you can see it when your thoughts and feelings and sensations pass you by and what remains is what you are. That’s why dissolution of the self is what needs to be done but of course that requires dissolving the mind and realizing this. We are infinite, eternal, in the present moment and forget happy.
Love Jim ❤
Every interviewer seems to get frustrated at some point. 😂
It’s the most hopeless message ever.
wow! Thank you very much for this interview, I can´t wait to listen to the part 2! :-)
Glad you enjoyed it!
@@newrealities Part 2 is fantastic as well, thank you!:)
That's what Jesus was talking about when he said "Me and the Father are One". The Father, the Lord, God, Christ, that is reality. He was one with reality, Jesus died at that moment and Jesus Christ was born, that's the union with the whole. He said ""Truly, truly, I tell you, no one can see the kingdom of God unless he is born again." When your ego dies, you are born again. "Deny yourself". This guy is a born again in the terms of Christianity. I wish everyone could realize that. It would be less suffering in the world. "God will make all things new", the concept of God is non duality, the Absolute. All this teachings are repeated in all religions but people don't want to see it, they prefer to believe in being something separated from reality/god/nature.
Well said. I recently discovered this is what Mary Magdalene was trying to get across before she was discredited. It's also the same teaching of the Buddha.
Perfectly explained. I wish all Christians understand Jesus's teachings in it's fundamental essence. Bravo
There is no ego to die,just the idea of it,there is no one to deny yourself..... lose the attachment to ego by recognizing it never existed as a entity,.... you as you think you are, has never existed in reality, just the idea, because of conditioning..... there is no one to be born again..and thats shocking to the ego person (idea)
Experience goes on but there's no experiencer........its difficult because of the restraints of language to explain what is....but we try...
On Jesus I would preface your statement with my opinion (implied of course). In my opinion Jesus spoke of a way of living. In my opinion there are many to interpret the bible. Jim makes no claim of being born again because if I follow him his logic he does not require it.
Cathars were Christians and dualist so talking about Christianity is like speaking of the Muslim faith...you really can't because there are many varieties many which are diametrically opposed to each other . (research what happened to the Cathars(Christians))
I am not sure I would claim Christianity however I love what Christ taught and there is truth there if you find it yourself.
Jim is the story that is Jim. That story claims he is not here (tough logic there)
I think that the are certain spiritual truths that are independent of religion but can be pointed to by many religions.
Religions are culturally accepted rituals that are accepted as a proof of spirituality to others in community. Spirituality is deeply personal and may or may not be tied to religion by the individual.
Jim seems to operate on a intellectual level I must be missing something here but I really don't see his connection to anything . I see no need to project his views onto what a Christian should be (my book ...Kindness ).
No knock on Jim he might be kind but he has given no indication in my opinion of being a Christian
I would agree that Jesus taught a way of life (the early " Christians" were called the followers of the way) BUT he also taught Non duality, "I am my Father are one" "The kingdom of heaven is within you" (not confined to the sky!) "Our Father who is in heaven" (within us) are just three of his Non dual teachings, they are not in the Torah.The Gospel of Thomas, that the church are scared to death of,is full of non dual teachings. like "Lift a rock and I am there" cleaft a piece of wood and there you will find me" or words to that effect. "God" is everywhere.
I feel Jesus came across Non dual teachings possibly in India as a young man as certain Tibetan manuscripts state along with legend,they wouldn't have been in Jewish teachings
I feel Jesus was and still is totally misunderstood. "Son of God" was a common term used at that time for anyone it wasn't meant to be taken literally just for Jesus alone..
Jim and teachings like his seem to leave a huge void and leave one hanging in space on how to live which is very important.
What Jim means is that the person we all think we are is a complete fabrication, an idea formed by mind conditioning. When I realised this, it was a shock and I had depression anxiety and insomnia for a short while,of course that was the ego,the person I thought I was .It is logical if you think about it,when we were born we did not come with our present knowledge we learnt it from others and the self, the egoic person developed along with the knowledge".I know this and I know that". " I am the body I am the mind", "I am a brain surgeon" I am a refuse collector" NO we are the knower of those things ,they change in time, even in a day,but the knower or Awareness never changes.
But it's ok now,now I'm learning how to live..but the ego person is still there, it has been for 70 odd years . NOT to take notice of it, is the challenge.
"Before realisation, chop wood, fetch water" someone does it.
"After realisation,chop wood, fetch water" No one does it"
Life goes on.. but is it paradise?
Great interview Alan, love your openness
there is no interview so why even post this. there is no post. I did not write this and you are not reading this.
Not quite. It still exists but as a dream, including the apparent person AKA the dreamer.
You are one and the same... :-D
Correct. Not correct. I hate you. I love you ✌
and u are not an asshole
That is absolutely true and absolutely false and this comment is completely without any meaning other than what is imputed upon it by a conceptual entity ascribing preconceiving meanings to a mirror-like display as a projection of itself in the now that is all.
"Life isn't about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself." - George Bernard Shaw
Being exposed to this message makes any "you", any "self" feel totally included, which might be the reason for sense of great relief it produces.
What a lovely interview that light up! Want to see Part 2
Jim Newman, one of the greatest humorist I have seen. Fine comedian (with all due respect though)
time flies while watching this I feel only 2 to 3 minutes
This is brilliant. It seems like a great comedy double act; it must be true ✌
Great interview! 🤗 So frustrating, because there's nothing to understand, or to know. It's beyond words and thought. Words are only pointers.. 😌
One of the most profound and funny videos i've ever seen.
Non-duality straight to the left ear
Being Fully Alive yeah it would be better in stereo 😨
Hahaha
What ear?
wow! this is my only comment, thank you for this interview, it is beyond awesome. Thank you thank you and again thank you.
pure comic bliss!! lolll thanks guys sooo hilarious
Of all people in the world, I am glad Alan Steinfeld is asking the questions I, too, seem to have!..or perhaps we have him as our own dream character aspect of our self.
Oh yay! I get to comment as Jim Newman’s comments are turned off. I love it. I know I can’t get it but I do!!! There appear to be appearances full stop. Total freedom. It’s just all happening. I’ve experienced not existing and being everything that’s no-thing. 💜
In the experience of non experience but just is, is the deepest gratitude in the discovery that the person or mind-made self is an illusion, a non- existing phantom. The gratitude is there for the freedom, the love, the liberation, the seeing that it,s all a dream, for the waking . It is like the dream of the world is created so as all life gets to recognise the life that we are, to know in a sense what and who we really are, Life Itself.
This is fantastic!
Very fun interview! God bless.
Excellent video, thanks for posting, much appreciated. New sub : )
this is the funniest thing ive seen hahaha i love it.
We are both sides of the coin simultaneously. You can play your human role without the need to apologize for thinking, speaking, using your imagination, these tools were given us simply enjoying life and playing this game to the best of our abilities. The ONE - UNKNOWING , the only thing it wants, is to express itself, and what I see is, Jim wants to strictly stay only as the One and avoid human expression which is the most fun . Poor guy, its not easy to be the One in this costume .We can play skilfully this illusion and not be lost in it, until the last breath. What a human dream! .I see that Jim has a strong will to interpret the One the best he can and I would say that he has no choice, but participate in this dream with all of us , with his new vision. If you have a COSTUME you have no choice, but participate one way or another, you are forced spontaneously to experience., whatever shows up in the front of your eyes, or your thinking is directing you to , etc........
nice pointers and yes! ahahaha!! i feel silence speaks it best, but funny listening to these words I felt that. ahahahaha😄
Funniest interview ever. "You were a regular person at one time." Hahaha! I'm dying here.
Isabel Zavoranu Lmfao
Yes it's brilliant! Love t.
Know the truth and the truth will set you free. That is all he is offering. Nothing else but people want more and therein lies the frustration. The things that separate us are just add on glomming to what is and isn’t.
He is right, it is true.. Even when for only one moment that "you" shift to the realizing that you are the witness, the observer of this projection called I, you really know. Finally.
Haha, great video. The conversation could just continue like this forwever :)
I love how much fun they are having by 16:10
I been watching tony parsons and jim newman, there's a woman too, called Rosemary, and "i have this clarity" but anyway " I'm still here" but i have 0 preocupations and any problem of any kind cause i really comprehend that anyway there's only what is and that's absolute freedom, so i found this message really amazing! I recommend Tony Parsons and the open secret!. Thanks, Jim is also a good one!
I think Jim is more fun than Tony Parsons....
@@newrealities Try Tim Cliss! :D
‘The art of knowing is knowing what to ignore’
I love this, can't stop laughing at this beautiful non sense that "we are" :-b
best interview ever :D
Pure LOVE!!!
'I' thank 'you' for this
" Most powerful " interview in this "apparent" subject ever!
Congrats!
+Michael Rivadavia Thanks... from my egoic self.
Namaste!
You are forgiven for your egoic self, you are using language beautifully to converse in the best possible way, but Jim is sticking to his way, the best he can using non duality = language.
who is on first, what is on second ,I don't know third base.
Non-duality is fundamentally simple, but speaking of non-duality is always going to appear paradoxical. The paradox comes from the limitations of the language and thinking which are (and must be) dualist in nature. To avoid the paradoxical language, and its subsequent seeming self-contradiction and seeming incomprehensibility is almost impossible, but the 'almost' is an important qualifier.
The best way to do so to this is to adopt a dual position; on one hand the practical and on the other the ultimate. In this framework Jim Newman is speaking here in part 1 exclusively from the ultimate position, and is both accurate and valid from that standpoint - however it is not particularly useful for a practical position. Its like having a guidebook of a destination vs having a map to the destination. From the ultimate standpoint we are already at the destination and therefore there is no need of a map and infact a map creates the illusion of the need to go somewhere and do something, (which therefore itself prevents being there). But from the practical standpoint - the standpoint of all who are still seekers - to be given a description of the destination may be ultimately very useful but immediately less useful than the roadmap.
Taken as a guide book, part 1 is great stuff, for any looking for a roadmap its far less useful than say Roger Castillo who presents steps to immediately stop suffering and attain the goal from where the seeker starts.
Great distinction Steve .
Well said.
Exactly. How can words (which are dualistic in nature) explain the nothingness that is apparently arising as everything? The point is that it can't.
Also individuals that identify with a separate self will continue to seek for something that they won't find because there is no separate self. I think ultimately until that is realized (not known or understood), the seeker will be stuck in a circle of duality
@@JontheShinko who is it within this body that identifies as a separate self
the man who asks and jim ... the best couple for laughing in this pandemia
This man is amazing and after 3 minutes then one kills Buddha by over-explaining what cannot be explained
Holy, Divine, non-dual and healing!
No thoughts only Bliss
For people who think that he's copying Tony parsons is totally wrong, his way of communication is actually quite different and I have been to a couple of Tony parson's meeting. Secondly this is NOT a message. You may think that he is talking a load of bullshit but he's doing the total opposite of that. He is not humouring the interviewer's sense of self whatsoever. Lastly, It's not about knowing what he is saying, there's some sort of an energetic transition that takes place that has nothing to do with the I, it doesn't need to be understood. This might sound a bit hippy but there is really no way for the mind to understand.
This is so good
When the story of me gets it, it disappears. It is emptiness...
makes perfect sense.
I love Alan. He's so real
Love this.
Jim Newman sounds just like Tony Parsons. This is an oxymoron but this is the best non-dual message.
I like being an individual and separate self. At the same time I also feel that I am kind of at one with some sort of overarching universal self.
Stop trying to get it. That's it.