If you need to end a friendship, I would recommend the quiet quitting method for most cases. The one exception is when that friendship was so deep that you really need some sort of closure to in order to work out your own hurt and pain before you can move on. Otherwise, just quit quietly. Common instances where you apply quiet quitting is when you friend didn't really commit any BIG sin against you but a constant series of little acts. Yes, people make mistakes. If your friend makes one mistake even though it's big, you can tell whether or not he meant it, if it's out of character. But if it's constant series of acts, then it shows his character as a person, even though they may be small. It may be snarky or snide remarks about you, bias treatment towards you compared to other friends in the group (eg, your suggestion are constantly shot down but others are always agreed on), lack of response in text or conversations, not finding time to be available. The problem is if you want to bring these little things up specifically, he may turn around and call you being overly dramatic or overly sensitive. And if and when you end the friendship officially, he could even use that to attack you in your own social circle by telling your common friends that you are being petty for ending the friendship. Best case scenario, you and him will be dragged into a 'courtroom battle' with your other friends deciding who is right and who is wrong. When you quiet quit, you save yourself the drama and the hassle. Your primary focus is move on and find establish NEW friendships. Not get hung up over so called friends who don't treasure you. And if those friends treasure you in the first place, they would make the effort to reach out to you again. Why should you be the one making all the effort when they don't. Another advantage is, down the line you may actually re-establish that friendship again. Their character may have changed. Without the emotional baggage of 'breaking up on a sour note' it's easier to get back together. Both sides can always use the excuse that the friendship didn't really 'break up' but just put in 'hiatus because of lack of time'.
Had to break off with a friend who was giving preferential treatment to others in the group. Shooting down my achievements, boast about their own, thinks they know a lot about life and people regret not following their advice. Refuses to address the issues when I pointed them out. Kept refusing to meet up, claiming to be busy but would hang out with other friends. I forgave this person a few times and thought it wasn't worth it anymore. I was being too tolerant.
thanks for the podcast, recently had to set really strong boundaries with my closest friend to the point we've almost cut ties. not that either of us are particularly toxic, it's just that our values and mindsets have grown too different over the years since our friendship began
it happens and it’s more common than we know it. It takes two mature individuals to make that decision so kudos to you for setting that boundary for yourself!
Cut off few groups of friends. Dealbreaker was, when initiating meetups, people who doesnt reply, doesnt take time out. Once, Twice, then im out of the group (k thanks bye no point staying in the group chat). Rule of thumb is, people who dont put you priority don't deserve your time.
Can we have a topic on work-related topic as well? Like how can we deal with managers who are quite bossy, micro managing, up tight and have his/her emotions everywhere
simple. as you grow up plenty of quiet quit. the core group will appear when , if we vibe, we tribe. and when you up your vibe, the smaller the tribe. but I love the Taugeh Tribe.
I had to cut out a friend who kept promising to hang out with me several times but never committed fr, so while it hurt that the energy was not reciprocated, it felt relieving to cut her out of my life and focus on the ppl who rly make time for me 🫶
29:25 I feel that there might be more to unpack here. It might be a cultural thing that makes it hard to find a tribe here as working adults. In some countries, it's easier. In Singapore, if you didn't become friends with your colleagues, some might never make new friends. Long work hours, great internet access, cost of entertainment, limited nature (and hence outdoor activity options) and hot humid weather makes it easy to avoid social activities since we can at the flick of fingers, get our cocktail of dopamine, oxytocin and endorphins delivered with a reel...
Am I a bad friend for not wanting to go for friends birthday parties? Their parties are always just drinking and playing drinking games which is not something I enjoy.
Hmm, what if you go but say you can do other forfeit, like instead of drinking 1 cup of alchohol you offer to drink 2/3 cups of soft drinks? Else you can offer new punishment in the group or expose a truth about themselves, say come on we getting older, theres new ways to have fun, if they say dont want, u just do ur own forfeit instead of drinking lo.
Ideally, invite those friends to come over for this podcast rather than talk about them. So we have both sides of the story. Often, the hosts of a podcast play victim in the topic knowing they are the problem/toxicator to begin with. Just saying.
Have y’all ever broken up with a friend or experienced friendship quiet-quitting? Share with us your stories below 🫶🏼
If you need to end a friendship, I would recommend the quiet quitting method for most cases. The one exception is when that friendship was so deep that you really need some sort of closure to in order to work out your own hurt and pain before you can move on. Otherwise, just quit quietly. Common instances where you apply quiet quitting is when you friend didn't really commit any BIG sin against you but a constant series of little acts. Yes, people make mistakes. If your friend makes one mistake even though it's big, you can tell whether or not he meant it, if it's out of character. But if it's constant series of acts, then it shows his character as a person, even though they may be small. It may be snarky or snide remarks about you, bias treatment towards you compared to other friends in the group (eg, your suggestion are constantly shot down but others are always agreed on), lack of response in text or conversations, not finding time to be available. The problem is if you want to bring these little things up specifically, he may turn around and call you being overly dramatic or overly sensitive. And if and when you end the friendship officially, he could even use that to attack you in your own social circle by telling your common friends that you are being petty for ending the friendship. Best case scenario, you and him will be dragged into a 'courtroom battle' with your other friends deciding who is right and who is wrong. When you quiet quit, you save yourself the drama and the hassle. Your primary focus is move on and find establish NEW friendships. Not get hung up over so called friends who don't treasure you. And if those friends treasure you in the first place, they would make the effort to reach out to you again. Why should you be the one making all the effort when they don't. Another advantage is, down the line you may actually re-establish that friendship again. Their character may have changed. Without the emotional baggage of 'breaking up on a sour note' it's easier to get back together. Both sides can always use the excuse that the friendship didn't really 'break up' but just put in 'hiatus because of lack of time'.
Had to break off with a friend who was giving preferential treatment to others in the group. Shooting down my achievements, boast about their own, thinks they know a lot about life and people regret not following their advice. Refuses to address the issues when I pointed them out. Kept refusing to meet up, claiming to be busy but would hang out with other friends. I forgave this person a few times and thought it wasn't worth it anymore. I was being too tolerant.
sending love ❤
@@YouGotWatch Received!
thanks for the podcast, recently had to set really strong boundaries with my closest friend to the point we've almost cut ties. not that either of us are particularly toxic, it's just that our values and mindsets have grown too different over the years since our friendship began
it happens and it’s more common than we know it. It takes two mature individuals to make that decision so kudos to you for setting that boundary for yourself!
love this podcast and all 3 hosts fr
We love u
we love u too!!! (& ur username pls) 💚💚
You should go sign up to appear in an a episode to meet them! Hehe
And the crew!
Thanks to the three of you for sharing this topic! ❤
Cut off few groups of friends. Dealbreaker was, when initiating meetups, people who doesnt reply, doesnt take time out. Once, Twice, then im out of the group (k thanks bye no point staying in the group chat). Rule of thumb is, people who dont put you priority don't deserve your time.
Yup, once you exit those WA/telegram groups, you can save the time for your own upgrading/sanity.
I really love your podcast 😭😭and truly hope there will be subtitles.
Joie n Q’s thoughts are so relatable ❤️ also can’t stand nic’s organic humour haha what is “y’all got like tsk* sad or not” 😂😂😂
Can we have a topic on work-related topic as well? Like how can we deal with managers who are quite bossy, micro managing, up tight and have his/her emotions everywhere
simple.
as you grow up plenty of quiet quit.
the core group will appear when ,
if we vibe, we tribe.
and when you up your vibe, the smaller the tribe.
but I love the Taugeh Tribe.
‘if we vibe, we tribe’ woww print that on a shirt 🤭
@@YouGotWatch the taugeh merch !
I had to cut out a friend who kept promising to hang out with me several times but never committed fr, so while it hurt that the energy was not reciprocated, it felt relieving to cut her out of my life and focus on the ppl who rly make time for me 🫶
29:25 I feel that there might be more to unpack here. It might be a cultural thing that makes it hard to find a tribe here as working adults. In some countries, it's easier. In Singapore, if you didn't become friends with your colleagues, some might never make new friends. Long work hours, great internet access, cost of entertainment, limited nature (and hence outdoor activity options) and hot humid weather makes it easy to avoid social activities since we can at the flick of fingers, get our cocktail of dopamine, oxytocin and endorphins delivered with a reel...
Am I a bad friend for not wanting to go for friends birthday parties? Their parties are always just drinking and playing drinking games which is not something I enjoy.
Hmm, what if you go but say you can do other forfeit, like instead of drinking 1 cup of alchohol you offer to drink 2/3 cups of soft drinks? Else you can offer new punishment in the group or expose a truth about themselves, say come on we getting older, theres new ways to have fun, if they say dont want, u just do ur own forfeit instead of drinking lo.
I love yalll
We love you too 🫶
Such a gud podcast!
if can get along, great. if not then split. no need to be so drama
Curious what you guys’ horoscopes/birthcharts are ghahahaha
Cancer, Pisces and Capricorn! You can make a guess. 👀👀👀
@@YouGotWatchnicholas is definitely a capricorn with his super financial mind HAHAHA kew is probably pisces and joie cancer
@@cassandramaetowle6053omg ur so close!!! Q’s the cancer and I’m a pisces ehehe
Ideally, invite those friends to come over for this podcast rather than talk about them. So we have both sides of the story. Often, the hosts of a podcast play victim in the topic knowing they are the problem/toxicator to begin with. Just saying.
You know the channel is you got watch not you must watch right? Every video you comment sia you like them ah
@@christinepekPetition to rename channel to You Must Watch pls.