We rationalize that we "prefer to be alone". We don't exactly. We just have anxiety approaching/getting friends and we rationalize it into a preference. What we ideally want is to be able to be with others and relate on our own terms.
I can do friends on a one on one basis but not groups. I find it impossible to read body language automatically, so I'm having to think about a person's facial expressions, hand gestures while I'm talking to them. I can't read more than one person at a time, so I can't do groups. I'm ok with light but noise causes me anxiety difficulties and I get overwhelmed. So I can't go to nightclubs or party's. Most people hang out in groups, so I have few friends.
Few none ASD individuals can appreciate how difficult friendship making can be. Friendship is a two way street. A none ASD friend must understand ASD. If someone doesn't understand your inappropriate volume level or repatriation of words, sentences or obsession with a topic, they can't make friends with you. I often say inappropriate things and none ASD people can't appreciate that I'm not trying to be rude. My ASD friend and I will speak about Doctor Who for several hours, every time we meet up. To those around us we seem rather odd. Other than my friends whom I've known from school, ( I attended a special needs school) few people I know can relate to me and I have a extremely mild form of ASD.
Unfortunately for far to many people with ASD it's not restricted to making or retaining friends. If you can't relate to people in a social setting, how are you to function in the work place. In my country (the UK) there is no practical assistance provided by a government body to assist those with Autistic Spectrum disorder in the workplace or an employer of a ASD individual. Many of those I know whom have ASD are on welfare for life. Many people I know whom are ASD individuals are classified as disabled. My 16year old step nephew as ASD and he is definitely disabled but his older brother whom also as ASD is definitely not. My older step nephew whose almost 18 as a decision to make, go into employment and loose the day to day assistance he relies on or accept his disability status and accept the assistance he needs to do day to day tasks. Many of those with ASD feel they have been written off, rejected and that as caused them mental health issues. I'm fortunate in that my job I rarely interact with people and while very able to function in the workplace, I often struggle domestically and socially . I am no stranger to depression or suicidal thoughts or actions. The largest cause of death in men in the UK, aged between 18 and 45 is suicide. I can't help wonder how many of those lost to suicide each have ASD. Equally shockingly there are ASD individuals in the UK in metal heath hospitals for simply being ASD. As a ASD individual, I know ASD isn't a mental illness. ASD individuals need understanding and practical assistance, not medical treatment.
@@missmayflower we don't just want friends, we need them. Humans are social animals. Ironically ASD humans are social animals that have difficulty with social interactions.
I'm 21 and autistic, i went most my life without understanding why i was the way i am and never got the support i needed. I got bullied for year and it ended up leading to severe depression and drug and alcohol problems that nearly killed me. Since i found out it helped me understand and sort my life out alot! I'm now sober and happy, i have a job that i can comfortably turn up to and I'm in an amazing relationship. It's good to see people helping others that might be in a similar situation to what i was, giving advice that could potentially save life's like it did mine. Keep up the amazing work man!!
Same here. Still in the depressed stage but just beer now. Just found out im autistic last month not sure if its made it better explained everything more or lesse. Still disheartening
@@dhhddjhd8460 I understand. I stop smoking mj. It doesn't help. I only hope the next generation is told that smoking will be your downfall. It won't solve anything but only make it worse. Found out at 32 that I'm autistic. Also there is a large chance your children may also end up autistic.
I'm 32 and undiagnosed. Haven't had a single job, and have lived off the good graces of others. I often just watch these videos to see if they can help me move forward in my otherwise stagnant life. I will state that these videos have at least helped me understand myself better, if even a little.
The organising thing is making me crazy! I love having stuff organised and i love having a system but im terrible at actually getting there and keeping it that way, and i have never understood why! I get these spikes(usually in the middle of the night xD) where i start to organise totally random stuff in my apartment and im super happy about it and then i mess it up again in a few days -.-
It is a practice makes progress situation!! You will get there! Thank you so much for the comment! Make sure you are subscribed and have the notifications turned on :).
I was having a panic attack earlier about having autism. I grew up with too much stigma for my own good. But reading these comments is so transformative oml. I’m in tears and I feel so much better now. Thankyou for making this community online✨
I use a simple whiteboard in my kitchen, adjacent to the table. I write down appointments/reminders on the whiteboard. I look at it every day when eating breakfast. I remove each appointment once done. Heaven is a blank whiteboard-no appointments!
At a recent meeting, one of my managers had a rant about how people with ADHD and autism were attention seeking c***s and why should he adjust things to suit them. Needless to say, I'm not about to come clean at work about my autism. You might think this is unacceptable but it's reality and permeates the whole business (and it's a big one ). It's a good job that I've managed to keep for 20 years and I'm a few years off retirement so it's a case of hunkering down.
I can relate, somewhat. I'm in a BIG company, always promoting diversity & inclusion. But, only for LGBTQ+, religion, race & physical disabilities, discrimination. With constant reminders/training. Which is, obviously, great. Nothing for ASD/ADHD or any other neurodiverse people. They refuse to offer any acceptance/training/accommodations etc. They list ASD, ADHD, PTSD, depression, anxiety, etc, as "self identified disabilities". So, they know, we should be included in the D&I "benefits". I rarely had any problems, until, they completely changed everything. Different location (farther away), changed my hours, different department & people. The training, was someone reading a powerpoint, in a remote conference call. I somehow adapted, since I was a team lead. Then, they changed my title (I didn't do anything wrong), busting me down to production, same kind of remote training. Expecting daily/monthly production numbers, maintaining a workflow, multitasking, constant changes & letting, anyone, give an error report, that is held against me. I'm about to be fired, from my job, of 11 years, I'm 55, I can't keep up, anymore. So, it's my fault, apparently...
Mark McMarkface ha, yeah I’ve heard that one before which always puzzles me a bit because I always do my best to NOT get noticed, but I’m lucky enough to work 90% on my own.
@@tat2dfreak3 I’m so sorry to hear this. Did they fire you? Did you find another job? Sometimes life pushes us out of things to help us grow. I’m hoping you have landed somewhere you enjoy.
I say to people like that "Yeah, they should be more like me" and me, being a great worker, usually get an "Exactly, just like you", and then my face darkens, my tone changes, and I say "Im autistic". You can imagine the discomfort it causes.
I really wish the UA-cam gods would place the commercials strategically. You know, like on tv. It's so friggin distracting when you're hyperfocused and suddenly there's an ad break. Really irritating.
Autistic adult here, diagnosed at 31 and again at 46. Had a bumpy work history (fired 30+ times) before I was diagnosed. My last two jobs I did disclose and had a LOT of support at the latter one, but those type of jobs were phased out and ultimately I needed too many accommodations. Since getting married and moving I'm in a situation where work is impossible now and was just awarded SSDI as a result of ASD2/mental illness/PTSD and physical stuff. (Surprisingly, I found myself married after basically avoiding dating in general.) Most of my friendships have been with other autistic or neurodivergent people. I made two friends this week after being in New Yorkfor three years. Complete accident, but I'm really happy about it.
@@jungetrifftmadchen184 Thank you. I was 90% housebound at the time, so not only was I not interested in dating from 1998-2012, I only left my home to be taken to and from work by my roommate/coworkers, etc. Had someone I'd met in 2003 online and lost touch with not contacted me in late 2011, it would have stayed that way, and I'd likely be in a group home or (slightly better scenario) possibly living with very old friends as a chore-helper. Most of my male autistic friends are as you suggested, unmarried. (And in various stages of caring/not caring about dating.) Now that I think of it, more than half of my neurodivergent female friends are skewing mostly the same.
out of curiosity, why did you get diagnosed twice? I’ve been considering a second evaluation after only abt 4 years, mostly bc I was diagnosed as ‘high-functioning.’ but ever since moving out/getting married, I feel like that’s very much not the case. i wish I could get evaluated for PDA, but it’s not recognized in the US. I hate levels/functioning labels, but I honestly think a level 2 diagnosis would be more accurate, especially since I don’t mask like I used to when I was still struggling to simply avoid homelessness and to please my parents
Is it common for adult aspies to have difficulties focusing on and taking in what someone is saying when there is music, or other people talking, in the background?
I do. I just try to grasp at key words when I know I'm zoning out and then almost repeat the question back to them to make sure I got enough of the information and context, then make a really genuine try to paying attention to what they are saying after.
In my last job, I was asked by my boss to not tell my coworkers that I'm autistic, because she didn't want them to have doubts about my ability to do the job. If anything, though, wouldn't it be better if neurotypical people saw openly autistic people doing their jobs well? Wouldn't it be an opportunity to show that not all autistic people are the same and that there are plenty of us who are competent and functional?
Although that would be a good thing, it wouldn’t prevent you from suffering the brunt of their automatic belief that you’re lesser until proving (some, people can be stubborn in their beliefs) wrong. I think your boss is thinking of your well-being.
I think there was a study that showed that people liked autistic people better when they knew they were autistic (something about understanding that lack of eye contact of other social "oddities" were not linked to hostility I think) but tended to treat them less like competent adults and more like children so unfortunately your boss is on to something. At the same time you're also right about needing to overcome the prejudice but it might take a few painful years
Slightly harsh perspective towards those who suffer with the same condition on a more drastic scale but thats autism 😅 I understand what you mean, there should be no stigma around autism. Personally I find it insulting when people are encouraged to talk about their mental health in one breath, then hide or disguise it in another so I feel for you if you resonate with that in anyway. Stay true to yourself lovely
I just got diagnosed with extremely high functioning autism last year (I'm 46). I have been binging your videos just trying to contextualize my life experiences, and I just wanted to say thank you for making this channel.
Functioning labels really do a disservice and minimize the difficulties we may have interacting with other or how we experience the physical/ sensory world and managing all life skills. I hope you find all the information you're seeking and welcome to the Autistic Community. This is a great channel.
I am an autistic adult and i find it very hard to be patient around other people and i hate waiting for other people. I also get agitated if things get delayed or people are making changes that are not for the better and have an impact on me
Can you please talk about the struggle of high functioning ASD and societal pressure ~ how this isn’t always known / how we’re expected to ‘blend’ in. Melt downs are real! 26 and TIRED of masking 🤟🏼
Exactly. And, oftentimes, the better you get at being successful & managing symptoms, the less the others around you remember that you STILL need certain accomodations...it's like they fool themselves into believing that it's all gone or perhaps, even, that it never was. So infuriating! Then, expectations are once again set for you that you are unable to meet, especially when the pressure builds up until you meltdown/shutdown. It can truly blow up your entire life.
Hi Dan, I am 55 years old, female, and just found out I’m Autistic, ADD, dyslexic, dyscalculia, and Low Executive Function, etc.. I had no clue, and thought I was like everyone else. I am trying to learn how to find what my true self is...and what is it that I really like, and enjoy...it’s so confusing, and I realized how little I actually know about myself. It does finally explain all the chronic health issues throughout my life, and the reason I never really was able to keep friends and why all the noises, lights and crowds have been such a problem for me, thought I masked everything my whole life..so now I am learning to unmask. Thank you for the videos, they are good and helpful.
I'm the mother of a 22 yo woman. We've always been close (she's an only chid), but all of her life I've had a hard time understanding her thinking and behaviour. Just in the past 4 months we've figured out she's almost certainly Autistic. We're going through the process of getting her tested, but she tics SO MANY boxes. Knowing this has made it a lot easier to understand why she does and says the things she does, and easier to empathize with her feelings. I wish we had known way back when she was a child. We are communicating much better than we even did before.
Thank you for mentioning being a parent. Ever since finding out and going through with getting a diagnosis I have been wondering. I’m a stay at home. Mom and I absolutely love my job, but it can be really hard sometimes and my fiancé doesn’t get it at all. I’m actually showing him this part because you described it absolutely perfectly!❤
I am an autistic adult. Recently diagnosed, and still trying to make the appropriate adjustments now that I better understand why I struggle with certain things.
Since you asked, I'm a 50yo female who found out 48 hours ago that I'm on the spectrum! Our son's diagnosis was the catalyst for me pursuing my own diagnosis. I also have ADD, depression, anxiety, sensory processing disorder (avoider), migraines, and a few other annoyances. :D I'm SUPER happy for my new diagnosis as it explains a HUGE chunk of my life growing up and is a direct challenge to all the "you're too lazy" and other hurtful comments I've endured.
I'm 52 and need a diagnosis though I've never had anything make sense of all the complex issues like ASD! I'm learning all I can to better my life as "self-diagnosed ASD". It hurts to think of all the recurring signs I've struggled with since childhood, but back then those issues weren't really on the map! Even now, it's relatively new to diagnose women with ASD because we don't present with the classic male signs. I love speakers like Temple Grandin and Sarah Hendrickx (funny) of scottish women's autism. Did you ask a pcp for a referral, and if so, what type?
Knowing what is the first step. But even then each step will seem like an unsolvable obstacle. My daughter is high functioning Aspergers. I knew at once things werent right. Patience, reassurance and pacing yourself will go so far in your journey. Good luck to you. 👍
My friend is currently pursuing an ADD diagnosis. She is in a happy long term relationship, however her boyfriend often calls her lazy and doesn't believe she has ADD. The waiting list for diagnoses in the UK right now is so long, I just hope he realises how much damage he's doing everytime he says something like that.
Im 34 and I found out only a few days ago that I have asd. I also just learned I was diagnosed as a child but it was hidden from me. I was non-verbal. And I continue to have spurts of selective mutism. My entire life makes sense and now I have compassion for myself. Thank you for your videos. ❤️
I am a 63 year old female without a formal diagnosis, but had two kids with adhd, and was recently told there was a high correlation in families. Since I was the opposite of hyperactive physically, it would have come as a big surprise I was adhd, but I have many of the female presentations of it and have screened online for ASD and it said I was on the spectrum. I cant tell you how many times as a kid I was criticised by my mother for what she called "sulking" when I was not even necessarily sad, just "too quiet." Others in my adult life said the same of me as if it was a very negative trait. When I did have something to say, it could surprise the hell out of some people that I had such deep and involved insights. A teacher signed my yearbook, "Still waters run deep," while another wrote that I had actually taught HIM. I am proud of my traits, though they do come with the pain of depression, anxiety and insomnia. It is crucial to learn about ourselves to reframe past abuses and misunderstandings about us.
Congratulations on getting your Autistic identification. I am sorry your diagnosis was withheld from you. Not telling a child doesn't make any challenges disappear. As Autistic people we lear differently, interact in unique ways, and have unique experiences of the physical/sensory world. That doesn't go away, and the way we are inferior to or less than non-Autistics. You sound so pleased to have some answers for yourself. I hope that connecting with you Autistic adult community helps you to find pride and co fidence, too!
Hi, I'm 52 and just been diagnosed with autism. I've struggled all my life and thought I was wired differently to everyone else and I've thought I maybe had a chemical imbalance that was causing it. I'm hoping now I can get some help..though I don't hold much hope. These videos are great in that I know I'm not alone. Tha k you.
I turned eighteen this past summer, and I only just learned that I have autism, among other things. I wanted to say that your tips helped me out a lot, especially those regarding relationships and communication. I've always struggled with that aspect of life, and never quite understood why until I watched this video. Truly, from the bottom of my heart, thank you. You're doing God's work here, and I can't wait to watch more of your videos.
A huge problem for me has been flat-sharing over the years, mostly in regards to cleaning. I know a lot of aspies are obsessed with cleanliness and order, but I'm not one of them. I find it so difficult to know when to clean, what to use, how to do it, etc. No one ever showed me until I lived with a clean freak and he actually appreciated my problems with this and talked me through each step, which I actually copied onto Samsung notes and followed them to a tee. Of course then when you move house everything changes. Now I make sure I clean every Wednesday as part of my routine, but it has been such a big worry for me and I have had many meltdowns over it. It's not that I dont want to do it, but i find the whole process so difficult to get my head round. cooking is pretty difficult too with all its different rules, but cleaning is one of my biggest problems being an aspie.
Yeah, I do’t think I could have a room mate in a flat it would be too difficult for me. Thank you so much for the comment! Make sure you are subscribed and have the notifications turned on :).
I have the same issues with cleaning, I'm alright once I get started because I hyperfocus on it, but I find getting started the hardest part. When I was living with flatmates at uni I struggled a lot because I can only clean/tidy effectively as part of my routine and it's not the same way as they would do it, and then they got annoyed at me for leaving things around or not doing the washing up immediately after eating (because I've used my energy cooking and eating) and then the anxiety builds from this because people are annoyed at you but you also don't know what they exactly want you to do until they tell you and then they get annoyed at having to tell you etc etc being an aspie and trying to live with NTs is so exhausting haha
I’ve found that it’s easier for me to clean if other ppl are also cleaning. My motivation depends so much on my environment. It’s like I need external motivators or something; by mirroring/body doubling, I can get myself into ‘Cleaning Mode’ and adjust my thinking more smoothly. If other ppl are relaxing and I’m expected to clean-even if it’s a mess only I was responsible for-it’s almost impossible for me to do it until the problem gets too big and I can’t ignore it anymore bc it’s impacting my lifestyle and/or ppl are mad at me (washing dishes is a big one). It’s like I can’t even comprehend what cleaning is because there’s too many steps and variables and I could start literally anywhere, so everything gets tangled up and I freeze. Luckily my husband is good at recognizing this or will gently point out/name what needs immediate attention I also have a lot of trauma around this stuff, so cleaning is also often a big trigger for me and I just avoid it more, until I get so scared/triggered bc I’m used to cleaning under immense pressure/in a meltdown. Sometimes in unrelated meltdowns, I cope by cleaning and keeping busy/out of the way, which rly worries my husband
For the noise canceling headphones bit, if you can’t afford noise canceling headphones, another advise that I have is to use earplugs, like the ones you would use to go to bed if you have a particularly noisy environment. I find that it helps to dampen the excess noise from parenting but also allows me to be in the moment and aware of my children’s needs.
My daughter has just been diagnosed with apergers, shes 22, so I love watching your videos, they help me understand what she is going through and how I can help
I'm an undiagnosed aspergic adult. I'm really early in this journey so I follow your content to to try and relate with people who have brain cases like mine and also just listening to see if you can offer any information for someone like me (you do). Thank you.
@@TheAspieWorld You have offered clarity after decades of me feeling as if I were something broken needing to be fixed. I'm not sure if there's anything I can ever say that could convey my thanks.
I’m not diagnosed yet either. I totally understand as I’m female who struggled my whole life (masking to survive). I almost want a diagnosis just so I can say I knew this already. I’m a highly functioning aspie Dan’s videos have been life changing for me.
I have just found you on UA-cam and love the way you explain autism - I am in my 50's and haven't been diagnosed with Autism but I am certain that I have it. You mention work and to speak to your employers about any particular ways they could make things easier for you - but sadly not all bosses are as helpful as your former boss. For me, (luckily) I now have my own art business (and I am a youTube creator) and I teach art - and have no one to distract me and it's the best thing I have ever done - I am quite a bit older than you - and have struggled with this massively and somewhat sadly - throughout my life and hope that one day I have the diagnosis needed - thank you again
57 yo female adult. Scientist by trade, but work in science law. Grammarly premium was one of the best things I asked my boss to use. I use a coach to help communicate verbally.
Oh awesome!! I love science I have a degree in chemistry 🧬🧪.Thank you so much for the comment! Please subscribe to my channel to see more videos from me :).
I wish I could come forward to my employer with anything but my work is the most ableist place I’ve ever worked and that’s saying a lot. Daily I explain what I deal with with my symptoms but usually I’m just life coached by people who’ve never been in my position or had my brain before, telling me what I should be doing.
Aw man that sucks :(. Maybe look for a different job? Thank you so much for the comment! Make sure you are subscribed and have the notifications turned on :).
That's horrible kind of sounds like my story I worked with people with mental illness and disabilities and then my mind starts to get distracted and now I don't have a job at one of the most stable places that you could have and it crushed me so I'm sorry you have to deal with that every day
Brian Parker thank you and it’s okay I’m currently just waiting out until September when I am able to move and find a better job. I’m already looking, in the hopes that with the extra time I will be able to find the one that’s right for me. I would honestly love to work from home so I could keep a strict schedule 😁
@@empresselfiie thanks for the kind words I I was kind of thinking the same thing I would be nice to be like a work at home a vacation planner you know something like that but we're all good at something so just finding your passion and hopefully being able to use it to make your life better do you have any passions about certain jobs are lifestyles?
@@empresselfiie actually I don't believe it was any of my lack of abilities I would actually be embarrassed because my boss wouldn't out how great I was and how well I did I honestly think it was a lack of funding outside of Cook I worked in the worst financial and another ways counties and that was put there cuz I was one of the stronger people that could do with a lot of the problems lot of drugs Lotto bad stuff going on and I was her to help I could either pick him up and we could go to my office and talk or I would bring my computer and I can do assessments and help him out with just anyting day-to-day stuff just to help him have a better quality of life living on their own and then I found out whenever I was let go my partner left like the next day because she couldn't believe they let me go I have never received thank you and compliment emails from co-workers before but we had a team of five or six and my boss was actually in a different area than my office and in a different County and they said I was one of the best things I helped him so much and they were so grateful for me and I was getting ready to start group therapy and some individual classes and getting ready to get my wrap certification sounds simple but it means Wellness Recovery action plan I had so many letters after my name it wasn't funny haha but the depression of it really put me in a dark place her about 3 or 4 months and it's really only gotten worse honestly it's been about a little over a year and one of my guys just died about two weeks ago and you're not supposed to have favorites but he was one of my favorite guys from day one Island he was a ward of the state so it didn't have any family so only a few people came to the passing not sorry one of my things is rambling on but that's just I'm in the middle of a whole ton of stuff right now but I hope everything gets better for you and people need to realize this is a real problem I actually have a card I can send you I'll send you a picture of it and maybe it can help you out how are you can give it to your friends
You're right about using technology...I use ASANA to track my projects, tasks and daily routines, Evernote to save and organize all my digital files, and they integrate with my calendar. It's like having a digital Mom :)
I am 42, my mom was a special ed teacher my whole childhood, and I never got diagnosed or even asked about it. I have had a LOT of problems in life with social interactions, but I guess I just rehearsed what people expected of me that it never came through .. yanno ... except for the obvious things like having to flex every muscle every few seconds, zero eye contact, talking so fast even I can't keep up, etc. Finally I got a diagnosis in my late 20's and suddenly everything made sense. I am a programmer and always did well at work (with headphones on), until office politics and feelings get involved and I fail miserably because I just don't understand the motives of others. Relationships - blah .. 3 divorces and I am just done trying. My last one straight up used my autism against me and purposely did things that she /knew/ I had problems with (like telling me matter-of-factly something that is super important to her but not at all important to me, doing it while driving or something so I cannot write it down, refusing to txt it to me or something, and using my forgetting against me)... or assuming I understand the subtext to a 2-word text message (spoiler alert - I always take it literally) Loneliness .... the struggle is real. I can't keep friends. I can't make friends. The deepest connection I have with anyone is what most would call an acquaintance. Online communities drive me nuts, I live in a tiny town that doesn't have much in the way of meetups/etc. It throws me into deep depression at least once a year, keeping me even farther away from social contact. Parenting ... my 2yr old boy is the whole reason I live, and I am scared ... REALLY scared about when he gets older and needs things that I just don't understand. Planning is huge, and organization and cleanliness. Clutter creates huge anxiety for me to the point I just shut down and disappear on my phone or something. Easily managed when you pick up constantly, but his mom was worse than he is about cleaning, which ultimately lead to us splitting. Thankfully noise doesn't bother me much. Organization I have nailed ... a bujo-ish notebook, backed up with google keep, google assistant (to add to keep notes, calendar, set reminders, etc). Works wonders in the car too. If you ask me to remember something, I never will unless it affects me today. If something comes to mind like "hey I need to do that", I tell google assistant to put it on my google keep 'today' list that I go through every night and schedule in my bujo and google calendar so it gets done. Any bills, important paperwork, etc gets scanned immediately and at least once a week I organize it all into folders, mark what needs action, archive the rest. If I start to slack off, my life quickly goes into disarray, letting frustration and anxiety take over and I shut down. Thank you for doing what you do!
Thank you for this video! It's so amazing to see how responsibly you handle your mental health. I try to motivate my husband with videos like these but he keeps burdening me with everything in our lives and refuses to learn any basic adult skills which he successfully faked in the courting phase of our relationship. I keep reminding myself that Autism is not the main problem, it's his decision not to deal with it.
Autistic Adult. Diagnosed at 30. I cried for days bc I realized... I’ve been doing a good job! It’s allowed me to be more compassionate with myself and not have such unrealistic standards for myself
One of the biggest favors I ever did myself was appeal to all my creditors, utilities, etc., and explain to them my condition and arranged to have all my Bill's come debating the same time. That way, since I get paid once a month, I can pay all my bills the next day. No late fees, no troubles caused by them posting a payment to the previous month instead of this one... Easy peasy now. :)
That sounds like what I do. Whenever I go to set up a new monthly bill (last time I did it was for my new car), I make sure that the payment date is on or after the 10th of the month if at all possible. The reason I do this is so I can go in on the first Saturday of every month and pay all of my bills at once
I am an undiagnosed Aspie girl. I am 23 and based on my own experience working with children on the spectrum and self-discovery through therapy, I resonate with a lot of the traits you have discussed in this video and others. I really liked your discussion of relationships and communication. As a grad student in a counseling program, one of the most helpful tools I have learned is reflective listening. It takes the pressure off of me to "mind read" and allows me to really listen and understand how another person is feeling. My whole life, I have had anxiety about making others upset or not understanding exactly what they were feeling. Now, I am able to step back and truly listen and understand instead of assuming. Thank you so much for your content! It has helped me understand myself better and helped me accept myself as well.
I bet you’ll be a wonderful counsellor. Professionals have not yet dropped the strong male bias in assessments. If you ever decide to pursue a formal diagnosis, it's helpful to find someone with expertise/ specialization in Autistic women/non-binary and trans women. (Because of course it is not completely binary). Clinicians must know how to interview for the different ways that communication differences and strong areas of interest can be expressed. Wishing you good luck with your schooling.
I'm a supported living care giver/ coach/ trainer. I'm learning everyday about all my clients. Thank you for all this information. You're amazing, Aspie ❤️
I am an autistic girl that makes videos about autism myself. You really inspire me snd help me with things about my autism that I don’t know how to explain yet! So thank you ☺️
I'm 52 never been diagnosed, have a Father has Asperger's, struggle majorly here in Italy with noise and lack of privacy. Managed to get a degree and teach at Uni and raise my son to be a wonderful young man. Have a loving partner. Am a gifted musician, singer, writer. Run my own business. Have some amazing soul sisters. However, I have PTSD, insomnia, executive functioning difficulties. Thanks so much for sharing. 💚
I am an autistic adult, I was just diagnosed this past August and am learning every day different symptoms and ways to overcome challenges - many from this channel! I also support a significant other who is autistic and has known all their life. We support each other quite a bit, it's wonderful.
I’m a 74 yr. old female and early this year saw several UA-cam videos by someone else about ASD. I knew what Autism was but had never heard about ASD. When I watched the video I was shocked at how much it described me; I then made an appointment with a psychologist and asked him, along with testing me in general, to particularly test me for ASD. My test scores were really high for ASD; learning this about myself has been so helpful in understanding myself and why I have responded in certain ways in certain situations. I have watched several of your videos and have found them very helpful. Keep up the good work.😊😊
I hate Autism with a passion, it literally robs your entire life from you. You feel anxious over silly things that most people don't think twice about. I can't go on vacation because I have a fear of not being able to sleep, if I don't sleep, I then convince myself that my brain is unable to turn off and that I'll never sleep again (I know that's not true) but when I go away somewhere, I can never sleep and it just doesn't feel like I'm relaxing at all. So the idea of not sleeping for several days in a row, I just can't deal with that because I know I'll just be anxious. I don't know how to get over this! This all started in 2015 when I had a bad night's sleep (at home) ever since, I've had anxiety over it. I really envy people who can just sleep anywhere and not give a crap about not sleeping. For me, being tired is sometimes worse than pain & the mental torture that comes with it is even worse.
I think relationships (the second one) could be way less challenging if most of the people invested a little more time trying to improve their own character, but maybe I'm delusional y'know
I mean could argue, that it also requires understanding. There is thing that Abled people are allowed to have bad days. But disabled people are not. We get a lot of criticism for having an off day, I may be 95% in control of my behavior, but there may be that one day where I just don't have the same filtering power as I normally would.
@@WulfLovelace If its about understanding. Theres ASD and ASD relationships too.. and other neurodiverse who still work on themselves. Unless you think we dont have problems except with the Abled.
I was is that situation, then I decided to go BK to school. 2 years later and now I recently got a job where I can work from home, and my boss knows about my situation and is understanding (I work as a web developer) It may seem like no light at the end of the tunnel right now, but stay in there and think about what makes you happy, then use those thoughts to push yourself to a life you would enjoy 😊 If working from home interest you but web developer does not, then take heart, there are many other jobs, take for example working with UX (User experience), many think UX ppl need a lot of computer skills, but in fact, ppl on the spectrum that tend to lean towards the OCD side would excel att UX, its the little things that is important.
2017, I was fired due to work stress which was caused by my employer who saw me as difficult because I could not handle change, I would get overwhelmed even collapse and be taken to hospital in an ambulance. The years of suffering has made me wonder if I can ever work in the future. I would rather die than face that bullshit again. I hope this podcast helps you, Delena www.myaspergers.net/what-is-aspergers/burnout-recovery-tips/
Super awesome video! The introduction of the iPhone was monumental for me! I have timers, dates todo all set up on the thing. I even set reminders for pots on the stove in case I get interesting in something else whilst cooking😱. I have a thing called Misophonia which is a crazy sensitivity to eating noises. I mean it hurts to hear it! I use noise cancelling headphones and they have been a life saver. I was too embarrassed to wear my Bose Q35’s at a restaurant so I would just suffer. Now with the AirPod Pros no problem. And fun fact Misophonia only got a name a few years ago and the team that discovered it won the Nobel Prize for medicine in 2020. Also your texting idea is brilliant!
I’m glad I came across your channel! I work for a nonprofit where I support adults on the autism spectrum in their homes and in their communities. This was very helpful and I can’t wait to watch more of your videos! 😊
Telling your employer is probably the best way to get fired. I hope to live in that world one day, but at this point in time, I respectfully believe that this advice might cause more harm than good
Im a 52 year old diagnosed Autistic. I went for many years with the wrong diagnosis and now that it is correct and being handled correctly I am doing soooo much better
Hi Dan. Your videos are great and helpful for introspection. There are so many moments where I say to myself, “well that makes sense now..” I was diagnosed with ASD last December. I’m American (unfortunately) and with DSMV we no longer have Asperger’s. The neuropsychologist who did my testing was clear in noting I would be an Aspie if it still was a diagnosis. I am approaching 43 and have spent my entire life feeling defective; like I missed the education on how to people. I feel like everyone knows what to do and people generally avoid me because I’m a “know it all, rude, or arrogant,” but like you I have never set out to purposely express those traits. Knowing I have ASD and ADHD have helped me not be so hard on myself and has allowed me to be myself more freely because while NT’s will probably think I weird still, I’ll at least not feel like there’s something fundamentally defective with me. I’m adding you on Twitter.
I'm 19 and just only now getting trying to get diagnosed (still waiting on my exams next month). I have meltdowns daily and am really struggling. Your videos have helped me tremendously. Not only do I understand myself more, but I know how to deal with things a bit better now. I really appreciate all the hard work you put into helping people like us and into your videos. I really do thank you a lot!
im 22 and pretty sure im autistic, trying to get assessments to be diagnosed, but apparently the waiting list is years, could everyone reply if u see this and just let me know if, if we literally relate to everything to do with autism and listening to many peoples experiences with autism, its like they're talking about me lol, would you say its okay to say im an undiagnosed autistic? or would you say theres another way of being certain of it without just purely waiting for a diagnosis?
Hey i love these videos that are short and sweet and get right to the point been following you for a while. I stopped watching a bit because your titles are great and they get me to click but then you show all of this extra stuff like you changing, driving, eating, etc.. 5-7 mins in do you start actually talking about the topic of the video. I don't mind all that extra stuff but why not make vlogging a separate video? I would at least know what to expect. Your live episodes also are topics i'm interested in but to watch a few hours for something that could be compressed down to a few minutes is hard for me to sit through. I really love your concept and earlier videos.. like this one. Keep up the good work otherwise
I'm an Adult Autistic woman. I become overwhelmed by Noise And too much stimuli. I Can'.misinterpret What people say, And Have A Delay In my response. Can be difficult! Happy to discover you!
Love your videos you have helped me understand my autism because when you get diagnosed with autism your not really told a lot and you kinda have to figure it out by yourself
Hey, I am a woman with high functioning Autism, I just got diagnosed last year. I love your content because it helps me understand myself better and it makes me feel less lonely. Thank you!
I can absolutely confirm the "join an online forum" advice is great. Even if one platform turns out uninviting for whatever reason, another may be a saving grace for your mental health. You just gotta find a community you get along with. Speaking as an autistic person who was arguably feeling depressed until joining a specific Discord server and finding that I'm friends with at least 90% of the people on it.
My son is 17 and was recently diagnosed with ASD, and we have known for years that he has ADHD and learning disabilities. I’m learning as much as I can to help him. I love your videos!
Dan - thanks for your commitment to doing these and sharing your experiences. My 17 year old has tough teen years as we all learned that he is an Aspie. He’s got an amazing brain and I love him very much. it’s not always easy for a non-Aspie to live with an Aspie. We both learn every day.
Yes, I am an autistic ADHD adult and I struggle quite a bit with life so I'm trying to learn more and more about my own disabilities to overcome the issues I face daily. SO glad I found your channel ☺️
I haven't been keeping up with my favorite UA-camrs lately (you included). but it appears you have changed the intro - I really like it. I've also noticed you seem more calm in this video than previous videos. Don't know if it's some new changes in your life.. but looks / feels great to me. (I have ADHD, but tend towards hypersensitivity as well - undiagnosed. ADHD is diagnosed..Hypersensitivity is not.) I have asperger like tendencies, except that strangely, I do notice differences in the way people feel and react. I am very conscious of those differences and try to pinpoint why. To me, it's a lot like troubleshooting. Also a tech geek. In some ways I think this social / people focus contradicts the asperger traits - but could also be a focal point of interest. I am oblivious to a lot of cues despite this ability, and tend towards either totally empathize with someone and understand their mannerisms, or if I'm tired / stressed / anxious... then I totally don't/can't. I also struggle with the whole looking in the eyes of someone and prefer sunglasses and headphones. Who knows, but your tips are always helpful!
I had never thought about being on the spectrum until i came across your videos and suddenly my quirks that i have dealt with my entire life make a ton of sense.
UA-cam was showing a bunch of asperger's/autism related content in my recommended, and I finally gave in a watched one. It turned into a week-long binge through five channels and now I'm subscribed to four of them lol
Hey Dan. I’m a 44 year old woman from Australia recently diagnosed ASD 1. I have twin boys who are 8, ASD 2 & ADHD. I really enjoy your videos, thanks so much!
Hello! I was diagnosed with Aspergers at 27 , I just now started trying to know what more recently at 35 you are amazing and so helpful!!!! I have watched all of your videos and have found you such an inspiration. Thank you !
Thank you so much for making a checklists or a "kit" I can just implement to help with basic problems I struggle with every single day. I've ben trying to create my own checklist to combat the daily struggles but its hard because it isn't always thorough until I face a new problem/solution and can update it.
54 years old only recently diagnosed ADHD, diagnosed last yeat with Aspy, have two daughters who are ASD (but not Aspy). It was when I was researching stuff for them (they were 12 and 17 respectively when diagnosed, now 16 and 22) when I started getting the... hang on... I do/feel/hate that, I was reading at 3 and doings long division at 4 and so on, and spoke to my psychologist about it. She smiled and said.. I thought you knew? I am going back to school this year and doing a BA in Psychology through a local Uni online so I can maybe help others who also slipped through the net.
Hi Dan, my name is Marielle. I am an adult from the Netherlands and a couple of months ago my therapist told me that I might be autistic. I am being tested on that at the moment. On my search for more information I found your channel. Realy helpfull tips and info, thanks!
Oh hey that’s amazing. Best of luck with the assessment!! Thank you so much for the comment! Make sure you are subscribed and have the notifications turned on :).
Texting has been a lifesaver for me...like you said, it’s so much easier than face to face...happens too quickly in person and texting you can take your time and emojis are a must to understand emotions.
Oh, amen. I feel so cowardly but when I have a conflict with a friend I have to wait for them to leave so I can put my feelings into texts. I wouldn't be able to communicate it right verbally! And on the flip side, I am much more likely to be an active member of a group if that group has a group chat where I can become familiar with people via written communication. I just can't talk words right!
I'm great at conveying emotions via texting...on the other hand it's too difficult for me to express emotions face to face .. there was one incident where I had some issues with my roommate,she was right beside me in her bed and I texted her to discuss the issue and explained everything in that text(rechecked multiple times so that I sounded polite,even though I was the sufferer)..she was like---I'm already here you can talk face to face...but I have eye contact issues..😣
I've never heard another person verbalize the exact same diagnosis as me 😂 hi twin 🥴 i found your video from food aversion that I'm currently going thru with my daughter. Thanks for your advice, you rock!
I’m autistic.. (Aspergers) and I would like to learn more about how to avoid mistakes.. well I’m unsure what mistakes I’ve done already but I’m a very laidback type of person.. my personality is the exact opposite of my Aspergers condition.. but it sometimes helps me cope with things.. my laidback personality is both good and bad.. it’s bad because people associate my laidback-ness as laziness and rude.. I have a don’t care kind of attitude but I do care it’s just easier to cope with things when I’m laidback.. I have an attitude like Daria or raven from teen titans.. oh and I use sarcasm like a coping or calming mechanism if that makes any sense.. I feel like it doesn’t make any sense.. but whatever I’m not sure if aspies can be laidback.. maybe I just acquired it.. everyone is different.. especially me
The Aspie World did you I’m part irish? Sorry you put in a green love heart and the reminded me of that.. and speaking about Ireland st. Patrick’s day is coming soon.. I think..
I am a mother of a wonderful 26 year old young man with Aspergers. I am educating myself on helping him anyway I can. Thank you for helping us parents with your channel.
Relationships are so fucking difficult. I (heterosexual) once wanted to approach a guy I liked and wanted to be closer friends with... by saying he was cute... And that happened 3 times now in my life. I have lost friends because of that, and suffered bullying. Nobody seems to understand my "love" for people I admire. Then I end up either being a F-word no guy wants near them, or a creep I am not. Its exhaustive, but I love to be around people. I'm constantly trying to find the middle ground I guess it's called, and the internet helps a lot.
Hi. Hetero female too. I don’t think I’m ASD. Spent a life time around psychology/mental health. But I totally understand what you are saying about trying to express interest in males. Sadly, it seems being direct isn’t an option except in rare circumstances. You have to learn the whole indirect game that seems to be our culture. I don’t have the skill. I don’t tknow if I could learn the techniques. I wish you luck.
I’m a woman in my 40’s with an autistic son in his 20’s. He was diagnosed . I suspect I am autistic though. Well, I know I am just not been formally diagnosed. I’m so much like my son. I fell through the cracks as a child in the 80’s . No one noticed I may of had something going on. I’m sure I’m not alone! Thanks for your awesome videos.
My gf and I suspect im on the spectrum. She is diagnosed with severe adhd. We find it extremely beneficial to sit in opposite rooms if house and txt each other so that our tones dont get heated and we stay calm. I can also reread what she says so i can understand better instead of it not being heard because one of us is flustered.
This is so great! Thank you. I have autism, OCD and dyslexia. I love it! It's not always easy but neither are neurotypicals minds and there are many positives from how I am. I recently got bullied out of my job:( And unfortunately my bully targeted my disabilities, and HR didn't do anything. And I fought against it for 11 months and it made me very ill. I stuck up for myself as much as I can but it destroyed me. Lots of shouting, trying to frame my performance as worse than it was, she even timed me by the minute, grievance was even a total waste of time. :/ Very brutal experience. BUT I am now excited even though it sucks being unemployed but now I have the opportunity to change. I think I can't work in an office but am looking into working with soils and in horticulture, so exciting!
i am a 17 year old autistic person, i am anxious about growing up so i'm watching this! a couple minutes in and i feel so much more comfortable and happy
When it comes to children and activity shows my tip is to sit by the door and have aisle seat as well so if a show gets too much then you can vacate without embassing moment of falling over the person seated next to you. breath and count. school shows can be stressful but if the school knows your difficulties normally they accommodate for your needs
I was started on the diagnostic path 4 days ago. I'm 32F and I feel like my world has been totally rocked. Finding out all of the disparity I've experienced in my life could be because of one single 'wiring' in my brain is both a relief and infuriating.
Somewhat of an unrelated question-I've had this problem my whole life where I can't decide on a career I want and stick with it. I don't know if this is tied to my autism or not, but how do you go about making a huge decision like that? I always end up choosing one and obsessing over it for a few months and then afterwards deciding I hate the idea.
We all have this issue with career I think you need to focus on what you love doing. Make sure you are subscribed and have the notifications turned on :).
So relatable!!!! I flip flop like a dying fish. I go from one thing to another to another to another....In all of these, I start out with extreme enthusiasm, but then that enthusiasm wanes, then eventually turns to complete indifference. I've been and done a bazillion different things, but can't seem to land on any one thing that just feels "right". I knew I couldn't be the only one!! In my case, I suffer from depression ( I live with a major depressive disorder) so it's sometimes difficult to differentiate between the anhedonia that this causes and any actual clear indicator that I'm on the wrong path/ just haven't yet found my niche. If you experience any depression then that may be the case for you also. At any rate, I get to the point where I wonder whether I have a niche at all; whether I belong on this planet at all, etc etc. It's disheartening, to say the least. I realise you wrote this comment 6 months ago, so I am 99% prepared for not receiving a reply, but I hope you're going ok! I'd highly recommend Ken Robinson's talks on passion ( and his books). It's all a matter of identifying what YOUR passion is. I've found that looking outside the box of "what is my ideal career?" helps with this. Just think about what you really enjoy doing most. Then it's just a matter of figuring out how to turn this into a career :). (I've def had an epiphany in this regard...but now I'm overwhelmed as to the many steps involved with making that career happen. O.o ..but that's a whole other story.. )
@@3leggedsharkkickssurferinballs hey! Thanks for the reply. I have struggled with depression in the past, and I think it may be more tied to depression than autism, because my non autistic friend with depression has the same issue. What I've been doing is just because I'm passionate about a lot of things is just sticking with a decision until I'm actually doing it, and then trying it out for a few years and seeing how it goes. I really appreciate the book recommendation! I'll check him out :) Hope the best for you!
@@Makealah Heya, no worries! Thankyou for noticing and responding to mine! Yep, depression is so insidious. It would be especially tough to deal with in conjunction with something like Autism which can already make life a bit of a struggle at times. (Btw, I was diagnosed many years ago with something completely different, but the more I learn about Aspergers, the more I find myself relating to everything being said, so the subject is becoming an increasing source of fascination for me. I'm seriously at the point where I wonder if I was misdiagnosed. It'd explain a LOT! ) That's awesome. There's definitely something to be said for commitment! I think for a lot of us ( especially me!) there's this terrible fear of making the wrong decision then being "locked in" to that for the rest of our days. I suspect that in this way I actually create a self fulfilling prophecy by automatically assuming that the thing I'm embarking upon I'll inevitably hate in a few years time. I'm trying to remind myself that this doesn't have to be the case. I can, as you say, just decide to commit for a certain amount of time and not make such a big deal of it. I'm trying to see everything as a learning process rather than a goal in and of itself. I feel this is helping to take the pressure off. Thankyou so much; it's lovely to connect and converse in such a friendly and polite way on the internet! Best of luck to you, also! Wishing you happiness and fulfillment!
@@3leggedsharkkickssurferinballs i completely relate to the way you feel about feeling locked in! Its a really scary feeling. Are you female by any chance? I know women are pretty frequently misdiagnosed. I went through a very similar process myself.
My son is 41 and is highly intelligent and has Aspergers. He lives with me and is very content with isolation. He hasn't had a girlfriend or date in over 10 years and is happy with that. He won't own a cell phone, doesn't like music, but does play video games, does research, and watches videos on UA-cam. He doesn't seem to be lonely at all. He only goes to get our groceries every 2 weeks in full COVID -19 protection gear and comes home and sprays everything with a diluted alcohol soultion and washes his clothes and coat.
I'm on the spectrum. I have 3 kids I homeschool (I'm self employed too) I can see how having autism effects my ability to parent in many ways. The biggest thing I deal with is that kids= sensory over load!
I’m an autistic adult and I am about to move out of state in order to chase a dream I’ve always had. I am watching your videos in order to have strategy’s for the upcoming journey I’m about to take. Thank you and God bless.
Hey you should join our Facebook group!! Link in description. Thank you so much for the comment! Make sure you are subscribed and have the notifications turned on :).
I've got diagnosed with ASD 2 4 months ago, I had kinda known for a while and had used your channel and others to help accept my being on the spectrum, thank you for all you do, ^_^
Sylvia Pineda I’m in a very similar position, and if you live in the US like I do, and you live in a state with disability rehabilitation resources he may be eligible for help introducing him to whatever schooling or work environment he’ll be in next. There are also colleges with mentoring programs for people on the spectrum which help with scheduling and counseling and also a certain degree of attendance and performance monitoring, I think. I’d look also for social support groups for his age group, which I was able to find through the facility that provided the diagnosis. It was, and is, an uphill climb, and I’m still looking around, but it seems like once you’ve unlocked that first door others start to open. Slowly. So, so very slowly. Sometimes you have to pry at them a little, but they open.
It is so helpful to hear the strategies you use to deal with situations in every day life. I am the mom of a newly diagnosed 14 yr. Old boy with Autism 1.
I’m an autistic adult as well as having other disabilities too. I’ve never had a paid job sadly but done lots of volunteer work which I’ve loved. I really struggle with all different kinds of relationships, and just now learning how to communicate what I need and how not to be too much for other people. I obsess over so many things and that can scare people. Any tips on how not to obsess? X
@@rachelannemarie25 i think in some situations those sorts of things would be seen as positive even by neurotypical folk. If you wanted to discuss more specific examples though (here or in a private message somewhere) I'd be happy to try to help you out with this.
Hey, are you on instagram? Add mine @TheAspieWorld :)
The Aspie World I think I am following there too! 💙 next week I’m gonna order a hoodie to support your brand!
@@74blondegirl aww thank you 💚✌🏼
no im not, but i love you
Lydia Ricardo If you like autism channel you should check out Yo Samdy Sam channel.
I've just be diagnosed autistic and dyslexia x
We rationalize that we "prefer to be alone". We don't exactly. We just have anxiety approaching/getting friends and we rationalize it into a preference. What we ideally want is to be able to be with others and relate on our own terms.
I can do friends on a one on one basis but not groups.
I find it impossible to read body language automatically, so I'm having to think about a person's facial expressions, hand gestures while I'm talking to them.
I can't read more than one person at a time, so I can't do groups.
I'm ok with light but noise causes me anxiety difficulties and I get overwhelmed. So I can't go to nightclubs or party's.
Most people hang out in groups, so I have few friends.
Well said. We want friends, but it’s just so hard and so confusing when you don’t understand what’s appropriate.
Few none ASD individuals can appreciate how difficult friendship making can be.
Friendship is a two way street.
A none ASD friend must understand ASD. If someone doesn't understand your inappropriate volume level or repatriation of words, sentences or
obsession with a topic, they can't make friends with you.
I often say inappropriate things and none ASD people can't appreciate that I'm not trying to be rude.
My ASD friend and I will speak about Doctor Who for several hours, every time we meet up.
To those around us we seem rather odd.
Other than my friends whom I've known from school, ( I attended a special needs school) few people I know can relate to me and I have a extremely mild form of ASD.
Unfortunately for far to many people with ASD it's not restricted to making or retaining friends. If you can't relate to people in a social setting, how are you to function in the work place.
In my country (the UK) there is no practical assistance provided by a government body to assist those with Autistic Spectrum disorder in the workplace or an employer of a ASD individual.
Many of those I know whom have ASD are on welfare for life.
Many people I know whom are ASD individuals are classified as disabled. My 16year old step nephew as ASD and he is definitely disabled but his older brother whom also as ASD is definitely not.
My older step nephew whose almost 18 as a decision to make, go into employment and loose the day to day assistance he relies on or accept his disability status and accept the assistance he needs to do day to day tasks.
Many of those with ASD feel they have been written off, rejected and that as caused them mental health issues. I'm fortunate in that my job I rarely interact with people and while very able to function in the workplace, I often struggle domestically and socially
.
I am no stranger to depression or suicidal thoughts or actions.
The largest cause of death in men in the UK, aged between 18 and 45 is suicide. I can't help wonder how many of those lost to suicide each have ASD.
Equally shockingly there are ASD individuals in the UK in metal heath hospitals for simply being ASD.
As a ASD individual, I know ASD isn't a mental illness. ASD individuals need understanding and practical assistance, not medical treatment.
@@missmayflower we don't just want friends, we need them.
Humans are social animals.
Ironically ASD humans are social animals that have difficulty with social interactions.
I'm 21 and autistic, i went most my life without understanding why i was the way i am and never got the support i needed. I got bullied for year and it ended up leading to severe depression and drug and alcohol problems that nearly killed me. Since i found out it helped me understand and sort my life out alot! I'm now sober and happy, i have a job that i can comfortably turn up to and I'm in an amazing relationship. It's good to see people helping others that might be in a similar situation to what i was, giving advice that could potentially save life's like it did mine. Keep up the amazing work man!!
What a beautiful testimony 🥰🥰
Same here. Still in the depressed stage but just beer now. Just found out im autistic last month not sure if its made it better explained everything more or lesse. Still disheartening
@@dhhddjhd8460 I understand. I stop smoking mj. It doesn't help. I only hope the next generation is told that smoking will be your downfall. It won't solve anything but only make it worse. Found out at 32 that I'm autistic. Also there is a large chance your children may also end up autistic.
@@phenitagomes1292smoking mj and meditating made me calm and balance is the key tbh I smoke only one time in 2 weeks
I'm 32 and undiagnosed. Haven't had a single job, and have lived off the good graces of others. I often just watch these videos to see if they can help me move forward in my otherwise stagnant life. I will state that these videos have at least helped me understand myself better, if even a little.
Oh that is super interesting!! Thank you so much for the comment! Make sure you are subscribed and have the notifications turned on :).
@@samuraineko3 😂🤣🚀🤾♂️
Do you live in the south ?
Or Missouri by chance
You likely qualify to get financial help from social security if you let them know
1:45 Work
4:54 Relationships
8:37 Home Economics
11:34 Loneliness
15:16 Parenting
18:40 Organisation
Thank you!
Ty!!
Thank you!
He didn't respond to your comment 😢
so everything...
The organising thing is making me crazy! I love having stuff organised and i love having a system but im terrible at actually getting there and keeping it that way, and i have never understood why! I get these spikes(usually in the middle of the night xD) where i start to organise totally random stuff in my apartment and im super happy about it and then i mess it up again in a few days -.-
It is a practice makes progress situation!! You will get there! Thank you so much for the comment! Make sure you are subscribed and have the notifications turned on :).
ugh I'm the same 😅 (I'm autistic)
@@TheAspieWorld Ofc im subscribed, got my diagnosis 6 months ago and your videoes have helped me alot, so thank you
Organisational skills are my worst handicap
Same.... only thing that helped a bit is having less stuff. The less you have the less to organize
I was having a panic attack earlier about having autism. I grew up with too much stigma for my own good. But reading these comments is so transformative oml. I’m in tears and I feel so much better now. Thankyou for making this community online✨
I'm on disability because every job I had caused me to feel like a tiger stuck in a cage and I couldn't get out. So, I work for me.
I use a simple whiteboard in my kitchen, adjacent to the table. I write down appointments/reminders on the whiteboard. I look at it every day when eating breakfast. I remove each appointment once done. Heaven is a blank whiteboard-no appointments!
i think i need like 4 more whiteboards because the one i have is out of space
I have a weekly planner that I can keep with me throughout my day, though the real reason that works for me is that my handwriting is so small
At a recent meeting, one of my managers had a rant about how people with ADHD and autism were attention seeking c***s and why should he adjust things to suit them. Needless to say, I'm not about to come clean at work about my autism. You might think this is unacceptable but it's reality and permeates the whole business (and it's a big one ). It's a good job that I've managed to keep for 20 years and I'm a few years off retirement so it's a case of hunkering down.
I can relate, somewhat. I'm in a BIG company, always promoting diversity & inclusion. But, only for LGBTQ+, religion, race & physical disabilities, discrimination. With constant reminders/training. Which is, obviously, great. Nothing for ASD/ADHD or any other neurodiverse people. They refuse to offer any acceptance/training/accommodations etc. They list ASD, ADHD, PTSD, depression, anxiety, etc, as "self identified disabilities". So, they know, we should be included in the D&I "benefits". I rarely had any problems, until, they completely changed everything. Different location (farther away), changed my hours, different department & people. The training, was someone reading a powerpoint, in a remote conference call. I somehow adapted, since I was a team lead. Then, they changed my title (I didn't do anything wrong), busting me down to production, same kind of remote training. Expecting daily/monthly production numbers, maintaining a workflow, multitasking, constant changes & letting, anyone, give an error report, that is held against me. I'm about to be fired, from my job, of 11 years, I'm 55, I can't keep up, anymore. So, it's my fault, apparently...
Mark McMarkface ha, yeah I’ve heard that one before which always puzzles me a bit because I always do my best to NOT get noticed, but I’m lucky enough to work 90% on my own.
@@tat2dfreak3 I’m so sorry to hear this. Did they fire you? Did you find another job? Sometimes life pushes us out of things to help us grow. I’m hoping you have landed somewhere you enjoy.
I really hope your not still working there, but if you are you need to report your boss because that is criminal discrimination.
I say to people like that "Yeah, they should be more like me" and me, being a great worker, usually get an "Exactly, just like you", and then my face darkens, my tone changes, and I say "Im autistic". You can imagine the discomfort it causes.
I really wish the UA-cam gods would place the commercials strategically. You know, like on tv. It's so friggin distracting when you're hyperfocused and suddenly there's an ad break. Really irritating.
Is there an option for the content creator to chouse manually where the adds are places?
addblock
@@agsilverradio2225 Actually yes but quite a hassle.
1 Chronicles 16:26 For all the gods of the people are idols: but the Lord made the heavens.
I'll say!
Autistic adult here, diagnosed at 31 and again at 46. Had a bumpy work history (fired 30+ times) before I was diagnosed. My last two jobs I did disclose and had a LOT of support at the latter one, but those type of jobs were phased out and ultimately I needed too many accommodations. Since getting married and moving I'm in a situation where work is impossible now and was just awarded SSDI as a result of ASD2/mental illness/PTSD and physical stuff. (Surprisingly, I found myself married after basically avoiding dating in general.) Most of my friendships have been with other autistic or neurodivergent people. I made two friends this week after being in New Yorkfor three years. Complete accident, but I'm really happy about it.
try to get married as an (autistic) man while ignoring dating ... or not ....
glad you are happy though
@@jungetrifftmadchen184 Thank you. I was 90% housebound at the time, so not only was I not interested in dating from 1998-2012, I only left my home to be taken to and from work by my roommate/coworkers, etc. Had someone I'd met in 2003 online and lost touch with not contacted me in late 2011, it would have stayed that way, and I'd likely be in a group home or (slightly better scenario) possibly living with very old friends as a chore-helper. Most of my male autistic friends are as you suggested, unmarried. (And in various stages of caring/not caring about dating.) Now that I think of it, more than half of my neurodivergent female friends are skewing mostly the same.
yeah, my current sjob is undrstanding well its a work in progress. i wish you the best
Re: Most of my friendships have been with other autistic.
Same here.
out of curiosity, why did you get diagnosed twice? I’ve been considering a second evaluation after only abt 4 years, mostly bc I was diagnosed as ‘high-functioning.’ but ever since moving out/getting married, I feel like that’s very much not the case. i wish I could get evaluated for PDA, but it’s not recognized in the US. I hate levels/functioning labels, but I honestly think a level 2 diagnosis would be more accurate, especially since I don’t mask like I used to when I was still struggling to simply avoid homelessness and to please my parents
Is it common for adult aspies to have difficulties focusing on and taking in what someone is saying when there is music, or other people talking, in the background?
Yes 100% Thank you so much for the comment! Please subscribe to my channel to see more videos from me :).
I do. I just try to grasp at key words when I know I'm zoning out and then almost repeat the question back to them to make sure I got enough of the information and context, then make a really genuine try to paying attention to what they are saying after.
The Aspie World I’ve been subscribed for some months already. 😉
This is a huge problem for me, especially at work. Open plan office - who thought THAT was a genius idea?!
Know that I and my father both have problem with the " the cocktail effect" ( worth googling :) )
In my last job, I was asked by my boss to not tell my coworkers that I'm autistic, because she didn't want them to have doubts about my ability to do the job. If anything, though, wouldn't it be better if neurotypical people saw openly autistic people doing their jobs well? Wouldn't it be an opportunity to show that not all autistic people are the same and that there are plenty of us who are competent and functional?
Although that would be a good thing, it wouldn’t prevent you from suffering the brunt of their automatic belief that you’re lesser until proving (some, people can be stubborn in their beliefs) wrong. I think your boss is thinking of your well-being.
I think there was a study that showed that people liked autistic people better when they knew they were autistic (something about understanding that lack of eye contact of other social "oddities" were not linked to hostility I think) but tended to treat them less like competent adults and more like children so unfortunately your boss is on to something. At the same time you're also right about needing to overcome the prejudice but it might take a few painful years
Slightly harsh perspective towards those who suffer with the same condition on a more drastic scale but thats autism 😅 I understand what you mean, there should be no stigma around autism. Personally I find it insulting when people are encouraged to talk about their mental health in one breath, then hide or disguise it in another so I feel for you if you resonate with that in anyway. Stay true to yourself lovely
I just got diagnosed with extremely high functioning autism last year (I'm 46). I have been binging your videos just trying to contextualize my life experiences, and I just wanted to say thank you for making this channel.
Functioning labels really do a disservice and minimize the difficulties we may have interacting with other or how we experience the physical/ sensory world and managing all life skills. I hope you find all the information you're seeking and welcome to the Autistic Community. This is a great channel.
I am an autistic adult and i find it very hard to be patient around other people and i hate waiting for other people. I also get agitated if things get delayed or people are making changes that are not for the better and have an impact on me
i find when i have to wait i brought a physical book with me to distratct me. now, with those kindles i use that. thanks to this tech world now
I'm soooooooo much closer tohappy when I am alone. I don't want anyone near me. Other animals and nature are so much more rewarding.
How big is this magic baby drawer??
You are like my autistic daughter. She needs control otherwise she feels anxious.
Can you please talk about the struggle of high functioning ASD and societal pressure ~ how this isn’t always known / how we’re expected to ‘blend’ in. Melt downs are real! 26 and TIRED of masking 🤟🏼
Exactly. And, oftentimes, the better you get at being successful & managing symptoms, the less the others around you remember that you STILL need certain accomodations...it's like they fool themselves into believing that it's all gone or perhaps, even, that it never was. So infuriating! Then, expectations are once again set for you that you are unable to meet, especially when the pressure builds up until you meltdown/shutdown. It can truly blow up your entire life.
I don't feel that pressure. I think it's a mindset thing to think you have to fit in. You don't have to.
Hi Dan, I am 55 years old, female, and just found out I’m Autistic, ADD, dyslexic, dyscalculia, and Low Executive Function, etc.. I had no clue, and thought I was like everyone else. I am trying to learn how to find what my true self is...and what is it that I really like, and enjoy...it’s so confusing, and I realized how little I actually know about myself.
It does finally explain all the chronic health issues throughout my life, and the reason I never really was able to keep friends and why all the noises, lights and crowds have been such a problem for me, thought I masked everything my whole life..so now I am learning to unmask.
Thank you for the videos, they are good and helpful.
I'm the mother of a 22 yo woman. We've always been close (she's an only chid), but all of her life I've had a hard time understanding her thinking and behaviour. Just in the past 4 months we've figured out she's almost certainly Autistic. We're going through the process of getting her tested, but she tics SO MANY boxes.
Knowing this has made it a lot easier to understand why she does and says the things she does, and easier to empathize with her feelings. I wish we had known way back when she was a child. We are communicating much better than we even did before.
Thank you for mentioning being a parent. Ever since finding out and going through with getting a diagnosis I have been wondering. I’m a stay at home. Mom and I absolutely love my job, but it can be really hard sometimes and my fiancé doesn’t get it at all. I’m actually showing him this part because you described it absolutely perfectly!❤
I am an autistic adult. Recently diagnosed, and still trying to make the appropriate adjustments now that I better understand why I struggle with certain things.
Yeah it can be overwhelming at first. Thank you so much for the comment! Make sure you are subscribed and have the notifications turned on :).
Chris Pinkard same diagnosed at 18 a few months ago
Chris Pinkard me as well
Since you asked, I'm a 50yo female who found out 48 hours ago that I'm on the spectrum! Our son's diagnosis was the catalyst for me pursuing my own diagnosis. I also have ADD, depression, anxiety, sensory processing disorder (avoider), migraines, and a few other annoyances. :D I'm SUPER happy for my new diagnosis as it explains a HUGE chunk of my life growing up and is a direct challenge to all the "you're too lazy" and other hurtful comments I've endured.
I'm 52 and need a diagnosis though I've never had anything make sense of all the complex issues like ASD! I'm learning all I can to better my life as "self-diagnosed ASD". It hurts to think of all the recurring signs I've struggled with since childhood, but back then those issues weren't really on the map! Even now, it's relatively new to diagnose women with ASD because we don't present with the classic male signs. I love speakers like Temple Grandin and Sarah Hendrickx (funny) of scottish women's autism. Did you ask a pcp for a referral, and if so, what type?
Knowing what is the first step. But even then each step will seem like an unsolvable obstacle. My daughter is high functioning Aspergers. I knew at once things werent right. Patience, reassurance and pacing yourself will go so far in your journey. Good luck to you. 👍
My friend is currently pursuing an ADD diagnosis. She is in a happy long term relationship, however her boyfriend often calls her lazy and doesn't believe she has ADD. The waiting list for diagnoses in the UK right now is so long, I just hope he realises how much damage he's doing everytime he says something like that.
Also a late diagnosed woman. Welcome to the adult Autistic community.
Im 34 and I found out only a few days ago that I have asd. I also just learned I was diagnosed as a child but it was hidden from me. I was non-verbal. And I continue to have spurts of selective mutism.
My entire life makes sense and now I have compassion for myself.
Thank you for your videos. ❤️
I am a 63 year old female without a formal diagnosis, but had two kids with adhd, and was recently told there was a high correlation in families. Since I was the opposite of hyperactive physically, it would have come as a big surprise I was adhd, but I have many of the female presentations of it and have screened online for ASD and it said I was on the spectrum. I cant tell you how many times as a kid I was criticised by my mother for what she called "sulking" when I was not even necessarily sad, just "too quiet." Others in my adult life said the same of me as if it was a very negative trait. When I did have something to say, it could surprise the hell out of some people that I had such deep and involved insights. A teacher signed my yearbook, "Still waters run deep," while another wrote that I had actually taught HIM. I am proud of my traits, though they do come with the pain of depression, anxiety and insomnia. It is crucial to learn about ourselves to reframe past abuses and misunderstandings about us.
Congratulations on getting your Autistic identification. I am sorry your diagnosis was withheld from you. Not telling a child doesn't make any challenges disappear. As Autistic people we lear differently, interact in unique ways, and have unique experiences of the physical/sensory world. That doesn't go away, and the way we are inferior to or less than non-Autistics. You sound so pleased to have some answers for yourself. I hope that connecting with you Autistic adult community helps you to find pride and co fidence, too!
Hi, I'm 52 and just been diagnosed with autism. I've struggled all my life and thought I was wired differently to everyone else and I've thought I maybe had a chemical imbalance that was causing it.
I'm hoping now I can get some help..though I don't hold much hope. These videos are great in that I know I'm not alone. Tha k you.
I turned eighteen this past summer, and I only just learned that I have autism, among other things. I wanted to say that your tips helped me out a lot, especially those regarding relationships and communication. I've always struggled with that aspect of life, and never quite understood why until I watched this video. Truly, from the bottom of my heart, thank you. You're doing God's work here, and I can't wait to watch more of your videos.
A huge problem for me has been flat-sharing over the years, mostly in regards to cleaning. I know a lot of aspies are obsessed with cleanliness and order, but I'm not one of them. I find it so difficult to know when to clean, what to use, how to do it, etc. No one ever showed me until I lived with a clean freak and he actually appreciated my problems with this and talked me through each step, which I actually copied onto Samsung notes and followed them to a tee. Of course then when you move house everything changes. Now I make sure I clean every Wednesday as part of my routine, but it has been such a big worry for me and I have had many meltdowns over it. It's not that I dont want to do it, but i find the whole process so difficult to get my head round. cooking is pretty difficult too with all its different rules, but cleaning is one of my biggest problems being an aspie.
Yeah, I do’t think I could have a room mate in a flat it would be too difficult for me. Thank you so much for the comment! Make sure you are subscribed and have the notifications turned on :).
I have the same issues with cleaning, I'm alright once I get started because I hyperfocus on it, but I find getting started the hardest part. When I was living with flatmates at uni I struggled a lot because I can only clean/tidy effectively as part of my routine and it's not the same way as they would do it, and then they got annoyed at me for leaving things around or not doing the washing up immediately after eating (because I've used my energy cooking and eating) and then the anxiety builds from this because people are annoyed at you but you also don't know what they exactly want you to do until they tell you and then they get annoyed at having to tell you etc etc being an aspie and trying to live with NTs is so exhausting haha
I’ve found that it’s easier for me to clean if other ppl are also cleaning. My motivation depends so much on my environment. It’s like I need external motivators or something; by mirroring/body doubling, I can get myself into ‘Cleaning Mode’ and adjust my thinking more smoothly. If other ppl are relaxing and I’m expected to clean-even if it’s a mess only I was responsible for-it’s almost impossible for me to do it until the problem gets too big and I can’t ignore it anymore bc it’s impacting my lifestyle and/or ppl are mad at me (washing dishes is a big one). It’s like I can’t even comprehend what cleaning is because there’s too many steps and variables and I could start literally anywhere, so everything gets tangled up and I freeze. Luckily my husband is good at recognizing this or will gently point out/name what needs immediate attention
I also have a lot of trauma around this stuff, so cleaning is also often a big trigger for me and I just avoid it more, until I get so scared/triggered bc I’m used to cleaning under immense pressure/in a meltdown. Sometimes in unrelated meltdowns, I cope by cleaning and keeping busy/out of the way, which rly worries my husband
@lucasmilito7421 yeah I don't know what part of my comment made you think I was looking for a cure. Also there isn't one.
For the noise canceling headphones bit, if you can’t afford noise canceling headphones, another advise that I have is to use earplugs, like the ones you would use to go to bed if you have a particularly noisy environment. I find that it helps to dampen the excess noise from parenting but also allows me to be in the moment and aware of my children’s needs.
My daughter has just been diagnosed with apergers, shes 22, so I love watching your videos, they help me understand what she is going through and how I can help
Hey that is amazing. Please subscribe to my channel to see more videos from me :).
I'm an undiagnosed aspergic adult. I'm really early in this journey so I follow your content to to try and relate with people who have brain cases like mine and also just listening to see if you can offer any information for someone like me (you do). Thank you.
Awesome, I hope I help! Thank you so much for the comment! Make sure you are subscribed and have the notifications turned on :).
@@TheAspieWorld You have offered clarity after decades of me feeling as if I were something broken needing to be fixed. I'm not sure if there's anything I can ever say that could convey my thanks.
brain cases XD
I’m not diagnosed yet either. I totally understand as I’m female who struggled my whole life (masking to survive). I almost want a diagnosis just so I can say I knew this already. I’m a highly functioning aspie Dan’s videos have been life changing for me.
I have just found you on UA-cam and love the way you explain autism - I am in my 50's and haven't been diagnosed with Autism but I am certain that I have it. You mention work and to speak to your employers about any particular ways they could make things easier for you - but sadly not all bosses are as helpful as your former boss. For me, (luckily) I now have my own art business (and I am a youTube creator) and I teach art - and have no one to distract me and it's the best thing I have ever done - I am quite a bit older than you - and have struggled with this massively and somewhat sadly - throughout my life and hope that one day I have the diagnosis needed - thank you again
57 yo female adult. Scientist by trade, but work in science law. Grammarly premium was one of the best things I asked my boss to use. I use a coach to help communicate verbally.
Oh awesome!! I love science I have a degree in chemistry 🧬🧪.Thank you so much for the comment! Please subscribe to my channel to see more videos from me :).
I wish I could come forward to my employer with anything but my work is the most ableist place I’ve ever worked and that’s saying a lot. Daily I explain what I deal with with my symptoms but usually I’m just life coached by people who’ve never been in my position or had my brain before, telling me what I should be doing.
Aw man that sucks :(. Maybe look for a different job? Thank you so much for the comment! Make sure you are subscribed and have the notifications turned on :).
That's horrible kind of sounds like my story I worked with people with mental illness and disabilities and then my mind starts to get distracted and now I don't have a job at one of the most stable places that you could have and it crushed me so I'm sorry you have to deal with that every day
Brian Parker thank you and it’s okay I’m currently just waiting out until September when I am able to move and find a better job. I’m already looking, in the hopes that with the extra time I will be able to find the one that’s right for me. I would honestly love to work from home so I could keep a strict schedule 😁
@@empresselfiie thanks for the kind words I I was kind of thinking the same thing I would be nice to be like a work at home a vacation planner you know something like that but we're all good at something so just finding your passion and hopefully being able to use it to make your life better do you have any passions about certain jobs are lifestyles?
@@empresselfiie actually I don't believe it was any of my lack of abilities I would actually be embarrassed because my boss wouldn't out how great I was and how well I did I honestly think it was a lack of funding outside of Cook I worked in the worst financial and another ways counties and that was put there cuz I was one of the stronger people that could do with a lot of the problems lot of drugs Lotto bad stuff going on and I was her to help I could either pick him up and we could go to my office and talk or I would bring my computer and I can do assessments and help him out with just anyting day-to-day stuff just to help him have a better quality of life living on their own and then I found out whenever I was let go my partner left like the next day because she couldn't believe they let me go I have never received thank you and compliment emails from co-workers before but we had a team of five or six and my boss was actually in a different area than my office and in a different County and they said I was one of the best things I helped him so much and they were so grateful for me and I was getting ready to start group therapy and some individual classes and getting ready to get my wrap certification sounds simple but it means Wellness Recovery action plan I had so many letters after my name it wasn't funny haha but the depression of it really put me in a dark place her about 3 or 4 months and it's really only gotten worse honestly it's been about a little over a year and one of my guys just died about two weeks ago and you're not supposed to have favorites but he was one of my favorite guys from day one Island he was a ward of the state so it didn't have any family so only a few people came to the passing not sorry one of my things is rambling on but that's just I'm in the middle of a whole ton of stuff right now but I hope everything gets better for you and people need to realize this is a real problem I actually have a card I can send you I'll send you a picture of it and maybe it can help you out how are you can give it to your friends
You're right about using technology...I use ASANA to track my projects, tasks and daily routines, Evernote to save and organize all my digital files, and they integrate with my calendar. It's like having a digital Mom :)
I am 42, my mom was a special ed teacher my whole childhood, and I never got diagnosed or even asked about it. I have had a LOT of problems in life with social interactions, but I guess I just rehearsed what people expected of me that it never came through .. yanno ... except for the obvious things like having to flex every muscle every few seconds, zero eye contact, talking so fast even I can't keep up, etc. Finally I got a diagnosis in my late 20's and suddenly everything made sense.
I am a programmer and always did well at work (with headphones on), until office politics and feelings get involved and I fail miserably because I just don't understand the motives of others.
Relationships - blah .. 3 divorces and I am just done trying. My last one straight up used my autism against me and purposely did things that she /knew/ I had problems with (like telling me matter-of-factly something that is super important to her but not at all important to me, doing it while driving or something so I cannot write it down, refusing to txt it to me or something, and using my forgetting against me)... or assuming I understand the subtext to a 2-word text message (spoiler alert - I always take it literally)
Loneliness .... the struggle is real. I can't keep friends. I can't make friends. The deepest connection I have with anyone is what most would call an acquaintance. Online communities drive me nuts, I live in a tiny town that doesn't have much in the way of meetups/etc. It throws me into deep depression at least once a year, keeping me even farther away from social contact.
Parenting ... my 2yr old boy is the whole reason I live, and I am scared ... REALLY scared about when he gets older and needs things that I just don't understand. Planning is huge, and organization and cleanliness. Clutter creates huge anxiety for me to the point I just shut down and disappear on my phone or something. Easily managed when you pick up constantly, but his mom was worse than he is about cleaning, which ultimately lead to us splitting. Thankfully noise doesn't bother me much.
Organization I have nailed ... a bujo-ish notebook, backed up with google keep, google assistant (to add to keep notes, calendar, set reminders, etc). Works wonders in the car too. If you ask me to remember something, I never will unless it affects me today. If something comes to mind like "hey I need to do that", I tell google assistant to put it on my google keep 'today' list that I go through every night and schedule in my bujo and google calendar so it gets done. Any bills, important paperwork, etc gets scanned immediately and at least once a week I organize it all into folders, mark what needs action, archive the rest. If I start to slack off, my life quickly goes into disarray, letting frustration and anxiety take over and I shut down.
Thank you for doing what you do!
Thank you so much for the comment! Make sure you are subscribed and have the notifications turned on :).
Thank you for this video! It's so amazing to see how responsibly you handle your mental health. I try to motivate my husband with videos like these but he keeps burdening me with everything in our lives and refuses to learn any basic adult skills which he successfully faked in the courting phase of our relationship. I keep reminding myself that Autism is not the main problem, it's his decision not to deal with it.
Autistic Adult. Diagnosed at 30.
I cried for days bc I realized... I’ve been doing a good job! It’s allowed me to be more compassionate with myself and not have such unrealistic standards for myself
One of the biggest favors I ever did myself was appeal to all my creditors, utilities, etc., and explain to them my condition and arranged to have all my Bill's come debating the same time. That way, since I get paid once a month, I can pay all my bills the next day. No late fees, no troubles caused by them posting a payment to the previous month instead of this one... Easy peasy now. :)
That sounds like what I do. Whenever I go to set up a new monthly bill (last time I did it was for my new car), I make sure that the payment date is on or after the 10th of the month if at all possible. The reason I do this is so I can go in on the first Saturday of every month and pay all of my bills at once
I am an undiagnosed Aspie girl. I am 23 and based on my own experience working with children on the spectrum and self-discovery through therapy, I resonate with a lot of the traits you have discussed in this video and others. I really liked your discussion of relationships and communication. As a grad student in a counseling program, one of the most helpful tools I have learned is reflective listening. It takes the pressure off of me to "mind read" and allows me to really listen and understand how another person is feeling. My whole life, I have had anxiety about making others upset or not understanding exactly what they were feeling. Now, I am able to step back and truly listen and understand instead of assuming. Thank you so much for your content! It has helped me understand myself better and helped me accept myself as well.
I bet you’ll be a wonderful counsellor. Professionals have not yet dropped the strong male bias in assessments. If you ever decide to pursue a formal diagnosis, it's helpful to find someone with expertise/ specialization in Autistic women/non-binary and trans women. (Because of course it is not completely binary). Clinicians must know how to interview for the different ways that communication differences and strong areas of interest can be expressed. Wishing you good luck with your schooling.
I'm a supported living care giver/ coach/ trainer. I'm learning everyday about all my clients. Thank you for all this information. You're amazing, Aspie ❤️
I am an autistic girl that makes videos about autism myself. You really inspire me snd help me with things about my autism that I don’t know how to explain yet! So thank you ☺️
I'm 52 never been diagnosed, have a Father has Asperger's, struggle majorly here in Italy with noise and lack of privacy. Managed to get a degree and teach at Uni and raise my son to be a wonderful young man. Have a loving partner. Am a gifted musician, singer, writer. Run my own business. Have some amazing soul sisters. However, I have PTSD, insomnia, executive functioning difficulties. Thanks so much for sharing. 💚
I am an autistic adult, I was just diagnosed this past August and am learning every day different symptoms and ways to overcome challenges - many from this channel! I also support a significant other who is autistic and has known all their life. We support each other quite a bit, it's wonderful.
That’s awesome dude!! Thank you so much for the comment! Please subscribe to my channel to see more videos from me :).
I’m a 74 yr. old female and early this year saw several UA-cam videos by someone else about ASD. I knew what Autism was but had never heard about ASD. When I watched the video I was shocked at how much it described me; I then made an appointment with a psychologist and asked him, along with testing me in general, to particularly test me for ASD. My test scores were really high for ASD; learning this about myself has been so helpful in understanding myself and why I have responded in certain ways in certain situations. I have watched several of your videos and have found them very helpful. Keep up the good work.😊😊
I hate Autism with a passion, it literally robs your entire life from you. You feel anxious over silly things that most people don't think twice about. I can't go on vacation because I have a fear of not being able to sleep, if I don't sleep, I then convince myself that my brain is unable to turn off and that I'll never sleep again (I know that's not true) but when I go away somewhere, I can never sleep and it just doesn't feel like I'm relaxing at all. So the idea of not sleeping for several days in a row, I just can't deal with that because I know I'll just be anxious. I don't know how to get over this! This all started in 2015 when I had a bad night's sleep (at home) ever since, I've had anxiety over it. I really envy people who can just sleep anywhere and not give a crap about not sleeping. For me, being tired is sometimes worse than pain & the mental torture that comes with it is even worse.
I think relationships (the second one) could be way less challenging if most of the people invested a little more time trying to improve their own character,
but maybe I'm delusional y'know
Yuuuup!!
I mean could argue, that it also requires understanding. There is thing that Abled people are allowed to have bad days. But disabled people are not. We get a lot of criticism for having an off day, I may be 95% in control of my behavior, but there may be that one day where I just don't have the same filtering power as I normally would.
The Aspie World love this response
@@WulfLovelace If its about understanding. Theres ASD and ASD relationships too.. and other neurodiverse who still work on themselves. Unless you think we dont have problems except with the Abled.
Amen!
I'm a austic adult I had to quit work about a year ago and couldn't go back and I still haven't gone back as it was to stressful for me
Oh yeah, I’ve been there. Don’t worry it will be better you’ll find something you can do well and enjoy :).
I was is that situation, then I decided to go BK to school. 2 years later and now I recently got a job where I can work from home, and my boss knows about my situation and is understanding (I work as a web developer)
It may seem like no light at the end of the tunnel right now, but stay in there and think about what makes you happy, then use those thoughts to push yourself to a life you would enjoy 😊
If working from home interest you but web developer does not, then take heart, there are many other jobs, take for example working with UX (User experience), many think UX ppl need a lot of computer skills, but in fact, ppl on the spectrum that tend to lean towards the OCD side would excel att UX, its the little things that is important.
Me too! You are not alone!
2017, I was fired due to work stress which was caused by my employer who saw me as difficult because I could not handle change, I would get overwhelmed even collapse and be taken to hospital in an ambulance. The years of suffering has made me wonder if I can ever work in the future. I would rather die than face that bullshit again. I hope this podcast helps you, Delena www.myaspergers.net/what-is-aspergers/burnout-recovery-tips/
I understand completely, once we run into a road block it’s hard to have a work around to get back on track
Super awesome video! The introduction of the iPhone was monumental for me! I have timers, dates todo all set up on the thing. I even set reminders for pots on the stove in case I get interesting in something else whilst cooking😱. I have a thing called Misophonia which is a crazy sensitivity to eating noises. I mean it hurts to hear it! I use noise cancelling headphones and they have been a life saver. I was too embarrassed to wear my Bose Q35’s at a restaurant so I would just suffer. Now with the AirPod Pros no problem. And fun fact Misophonia only got a name a few years ago and the team that discovered it won the Nobel Prize for medicine in 2020. Also your texting idea is brilliant!
I’m glad I came across your channel! I work for a nonprofit where I support adults on the autism spectrum in their homes and in their communities. This was very helpful and I can’t wait to watch more of your videos! 😊
HEYY!! Thank you so much for the comment! Please subscribe to my channel to see more videos from me :).
Just been diagnosed with Autism Spectrum Disorder. Busy learning more about coping mechanisms and strategies to cope better with everyday life.
Telling your employer is probably the best way to get fired. I hope to live in that world one day, but at this point in time, I respectfully believe that this advice might cause more harm than good
Im a 52 year old diagnosed Autistic. I went for many years with the wrong diagnosis and now that it is correct and being handled correctly I am doing soooo much better
Hi Dan. Your videos are great and helpful for introspection. There are so many moments where I say to myself, “well that makes sense now..” I was diagnosed with ASD last December. I’m American (unfortunately) and with DSMV we no longer have Asperger’s. The neuropsychologist who did my testing was clear in noting I would be an Aspie if it still was a diagnosis. I am approaching 43 and have spent my entire life feeling defective; like I missed the education on how to people. I feel like everyone knows what to do and people generally avoid me because I’m a “know it all, rude, or arrogant,” but like you I have never set out to purposely express those traits. Knowing I have ASD and ADHD have helped me not be so hard on myself and has allowed me to be myself more freely because while NT’s will probably think I weird still, I’ll at least not feel like there’s something fundamentally defective with me. I’m adding you on Twitter.
Thank you so much!! Make sure you are subscribed and have the notifications turned on :).
I'm 19 and just only now getting trying to get diagnosed (still waiting on my exams next month). I have meltdowns daily and am really struggling. Your videos have helped me tremendously. Not only do I understand myself more, but I know how to deal with things a bit better now. I really appreciate all the hard work you put into helping people like us and into your videos. I really do thank you a lot!
im 22 and pretty sure im autistic, trying to get assessments to be diagnosed, but apparently the waiting list is years, could everyone reply if u see this and just let me know if, if we literally relate to everything to do with autism and listening to many peoples experiences with autism, its like they're talking about me lol, would you say its okay to say im an undiagnosed autistic? or would you say theres another way of being certain of it without just purely waiting for a diagnosis?
Hey i love these videos that are short and sweet and get right to the point been following you for a while. I stopped watching a bit because your titles are great and they get me to click but then you show all of this extra stuff like you changing, driving, eating, etc.. 5-7 mins in do you start actually talking about the topic of the video. I don't mind all that extra stuff but why not make vlogging a separate video? I would at least know what to expect. Your live episodes also are topics i'm interested in but to watch a few hours for something that could be compressed down to a few minutes is hard for me to sit through. I really love your concept and earlier videos.. like this one. Keep up the good work otherwise
Thank you so much for the feedback.
@@TheAspieWorld TY for being one of the many great voices in our community >.< You started me on my life recovery :D
The Aspie World perhaps you could have a 2nd vlog-based channel!
I'm an Adult Autistic woman. I become overwhelmed by Noise And too much stimuli. I Can'.misinterpret What people say, And Have A Delay In my response. Can be difficult! Happy to discover you!
Love your videos you have helped me understand my autism because when you get diagnosed with autism your not really told a lot and you kinda have to figure it out by yourself
That is amazing thank you
The Aspie World it’s true your so inspirational
Hey, I am a woman with high functioning Autism, I just got diagnosed last year. I love your content because it helps me understand myself better and it makes me feel less lonely. Thank you!
Hey that is so sweet of you thank you!! Thank you so much for the comment! Make sure you are subscribed and have the notifications turned on :).
@@TheAspieWorld done and done 👍
I’m an autistic adult (36f). I wasn’t diagnosed until age 30. After years of misdiagnosis, it finally made sense.
Thank you so much for the comment! Make sure you are subscribed and have the notifications turned on :).
I can absolutely confirm the "join an online forum" advice is great. Even if one platform turns out uninviting for whatever reason, another may be a saving grace for your mental health. You just gotta find a community you get along with. Speaking as an autistic person who was arguably feeling depressed until joining a specific Discord server and finding that I'm friends with at least 90% of the people on it.
My son is 17 and was recently diagnosed with ASD, and we have known for years that he has ADHD and learning disabilities. I’m learning as much as I can to help him. I love your videos!
YAY!! That is amazing, super happy to help!! Thank you so much for the comment! Please subscribe to my channel to see more videos from me :).
Dan - thanks for your commitment to doing these and sharing your experiences. My 17 year old has tough teen years as we all learned that he is an Aspie. He’s got an amazing brain and I love him very much. it’s not always easy for a non-Aspie to live with an Aspie. We both learn every day.
Hey!! You are more than welcome! Thank you so much for the comment! Make sure you are subscribed and have the notifications turned on :).
Yes, I am an autistic ADHD adult and I struggle quite a bit with life so I'm trying to learn more and more about my own disabilities to overcome the issues I face daily. SO glad I found your channel ☺️
I haven't been keeping up with my favorite UA-camrs lately (you included). but it appears you have changed the intro - I really like it. I've also noticed you seem more calm in this video than previous videos. Don't know if it's some new changes in your life.. but looks / feels great to me. (I have ADHD, but tend towards hypersensitivity as well - undiagnosed. ADHD is diagnosed..Hypersensitivity is not.) I have asperger like tendencies, except that strangely, I do notice differences in the way people feel and react. I am very conscious of those differences and try to pinpoint why. To me, it's a lot like troubleshooting. Also a tech geek. In some ways I think this social / people focus contradicts the asperger traits - but could also be a focal point of interest. I am oblivious to a lot of cues despite this ability, and tend towards either totally empathize with someone and understand their mannerisms, or if I'm tired / stressed / anxious... then I totally don't/can't. I also struggle with the whole looking in the eyes of someone and prefer sunglasses and headphones. Who knows, but your tips are always helpful!
HEYY welcome back haha!! Yeah I am on new medication now :).
I had never thought about being on the spectrum until i came across your videos and suddenly my quirks that i have dealt with my entire life make a ton of sense.
UA-cam was showing a bunch of asperger's/autism related content in my recommended, and I finally gave in a watched one. It turned into a week-long binge through five channels and now I'm subscribed to four of them lol
Hey Dan. I’m a 44 year old woman from Australia recently diagnosed ASD 1. I have twin boys who are 8, ASD 2 & ADHD. I really enjoy your videos, thanks so much!
I'm a recently diagnosed 63 y.o. Tasmanian aspie and, like you, totally enjoy Dan's videos.
I'm a 52 year old Australian Aspie, diagnosed at 50 by psychologist and autism specialist, Tania Marshall.
jenlovesthisstuff Wow! Where in Australia are you?
@@traceymckinnon3095 Riverina NSW
Hi, what's the difference between add 1 & 2?
I just realized that I resonate with the ASD and not knowing how to deal with it, but for me it's a big relieve Thank you for your videos
Supporting an Asperger high school senior who’s 18 and entering adulthood quickly
Oh cool good to have you here, I hope this helps 😊✌🏼
Hello! I was diagnosed with Aspergers at 27 , I just now started trying to know what more recently at 35 you are amazing and so helpful!!!! I have watched all of your videos and have found you such an inspiration. Thank you !
Thank you so much for making a checklists or a "kit" I can just implement to help with basic problems I struggle with every single day. I've ben trying to create my own checklist to combat the daily struggles but its hard because it isn't always thorough until I face a new problem/solution and can update it.
✌🏼 Thank you so much for the comment! Make sure you are subscribed and have the notifications turned on :).
54 years old only recently diagnosed ADHD, diagnosed last yeat with Aspy, have two daughters who are ASD (but not Aspy). It was when I was researching stuff for them (they were 12 and 17 respectively when diagnosed, now 16 and 22) when I started getting the... hang on... I do/feel/hate that, I was reading at 3 and doings long division at 4 and so on, and spoke to my psychologist about it. She smiled and said.. I thought you knew?
I am going back to school this year and doing a BA in Psychology through a local Uni online so I can maybe help others who also slipped through the net.
I slipped through the net, because I moved so often. I finally figured out what was going on around 50 years.
Hi Dan, my name is Marielle. I am an adult from the Netherlands and a couple of months ago my therapist told me that I might be autistic. I am being tested on that at the moment. On my search for more information I found your channel. Realy helpfull tips and info, thanks!
Oh hey that’s amazing. Best of luck with the assessment!! Thank you so much for the comment! Make sure you are subscribed and have the notifications turned on :).
Ha I'm from the Netherlands too. What region are you from because there are some autism café's out there.
Hi, I am from the region Apeldoorn, Gelderland.
Here to learn how to support my adult son who was recently diagnosed. Thanks!
Texting has been a lifesaver for me...like you said, it’s so much easier than face to face...happens too quickly in person and texting you can take your time and emojis are a must to understand emotions.
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Oh, amen. I feel so cowardly but when I have a conflict with a friend I have to wait for them to leave so I can put my feelings into texts. I wouldn't be able to communicate it right verbally! And on the flip side, I am much more likely to be an active member of a group if that group has a group chat where I can become familiar with people via written communication. I just can't talk words right!
I'm great at conveying emotions via texting...on the other hand it's too difficult for me to express emotions face to face .. there was one incident where I had some issues with my roommate,she was right beside me in her bed and I texted her to discuss the issue and explained everything in that text(rechecked multiple times so that I sounded polite,even though I was the sufferer)..she was like---I'm already here you can talk face to face...but I have eye contact issues..😣
I don't like people who send voice messages in WhatsApp. I don't know if they expect me to do the same. Why they do that?
hmmm.... my so-called fiancee prefers texting as i. i don't know sometimes i want out
Just discovered you strong. Brilliant. I am supporting a 52 yr old son with autism. I am leaning such a lot from you. Thank you so mu h
I sleep when I become overwhelmed and overstimulated- my family joke that I have social narcolepsy. :p
I do that also.
Same
My son is high functioning autistic and 24 years old. He is wonderful and perfect.
I've never heard another person verbalize the exact same diagnosis as me 😂 hi twin 🥴 i found your video from food aversion that I'm currently going thru with my daughter. Thanks for your advice, you rock!
having the organized baby stuff sounds good for anyone, thank you
I’m autistic.. (Aspergers) and I would like to learn more about how to avoid mistakes.. well I’m unsure what mistakes I’ve done already but I’m a very laidback type of person.. my personality is the exact opposite of my Aspergers condition.. but it sometimes helps me cope with things.. my laidback personality is both good and bad.. it’s bad because people associate my laidback-ness as laziness and rude.. I have a don’t care kind of attitude but I do care it’s just easier to cope with things when I’m laidback.. I have an attitude like Daria or raven from teen titans.. oh and I use sarcasm like a coping or calming mechanism if that makes any sense.. I feel like it doesn’t make any sense.. but whatever I’m not sure if aspies can be laidback.. maybe I just acquired it.. everyone is different.. especially me
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The Aspie World did you I’m part irish? Sorry you put in a green love heart and the reminded me of that.. and speaking about Ireland st. Patrick’s day is coming soon.. I think..
I am a mother of a wonderful 26 year old young man with Aspergers. I am educating myself on helping him anyway I can. Thank you for helping us parents with your channel.
Relationships are so fucking difficult.
I (heterosexual) once wanted to approach a guy I liked and wanted to be closer friends with... by saying he was cute...
And that happened 3 times now in my life. I have lost friends because of that, and suffered bullying. Nobody seems to understand my "love" for people I admire. Then I end up either being a F-word no guy wants near them, or a creep I am not. Its exhaustive, but I love to be around people.
I'm constantly trying to find the middle ground I guess it's called, and the internet helps a lot.
Hi. Hetero female too. I don’t think I’m ASD. Spent a life time around psychology/mental health. But I totally understand what you are saying about trying to express interest in males. Sadly, it seems being direct isn’t an option except in rare circumstances. You have to learn the whole indirect game that seems to be our culture. I don’t have the skill. I don’t tknow if I could learn the techniques. I wish you luck.
I’m a woman in my 40’s with an autistic son in his 20’s. He was diagnosed . I suspect I am autistic though. Well, I know I am just not been formally diagnosed. I’m so much like my son. I fell through the cracks as a child in the 80’s . No one noticed I may of had something going on. I’m sure I’m not alone! Thanks for your awesome videos.
My gf and I suspect im on the spectrum. She is diagnosed with severe adhd.
We find it extremely beneficial to sit in opposite rooms if house and txt each other so that our tones dont get heated and we stay calm. I can also reread what she says so i can understand better instead of it not being heard because one of us is flustered.
That’s an interesting idea!! Good work around! Thank you so much for the comment! Please subscribe to my channel to see more videos from me :).
This is so great! Thank you. I have autism, OCD and dyslexia. I love it! It's not always easy but neither are neurotypicals minds and there are many positives from how I am. I recently got bullied out of my job:( And unfortunately my bully targeted my disabilities, and HR didn't do anything. And I fought against it for 11 months and it made me very ill. I stuck up for myself as much as I can but it destroyed me. Lots of shouting, trying to frame my performance as worse than it was, she even timed me by the minute, grievance was even a total waste of time. :/ Very brutal experience. BUT I am now excited even though it sucks being unemployed but now I have the opportunity to change. I think I can't work in an office but am looking into working with soils and in horticulture, so exciting!
I have viewed this as someone diagnosed late in life. I think that open plan offices are also bad for neuro typical people.
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i am a 17 year old autistic person, i am anxious about growing up so i'm watching this! a couple minutes in and i feel so much more comfortable and happy
When it comes to children and activity shows my tip is to sit by the door and have aisle seat as well so if a show gets too much then you can vacate without embassing moment of falling over the person seated next to you. breath and count. school shows can be stressful but if the school knows your difficulties normally they accommodate for your needs
Ooh yeah!! Thanks for the input there! Thank you so much for the comment! Please subscribe to my channel to see more videos from me :).
I was started on the diagnostic path 4 days ago. I'm 32F and I feel like my world has been totally rocked.
Finding out all of the disparity I've experienced in my life could be because of one single 'wiring' in my brain is both a relief and infuriating.
Somewhat of an unrelated question-I've had this problem my whole life where I can't decide on a career I want and stick with it. I don't know if this is tied to my autism or not, but how do you go about making a huge decision like that? I always end up choosing one and obsessing over it for a few months and then afterwards deciding I hate the idea.
We all have this issue with career I think you need to focus on what you love doing. Make sure you are subscribed and have the notifications turned on :).
So relatable!!!! I flip flop like a dying fish. I go from one thing to another to another to another....In all of these, I start out with extreme enthusiasm, but then that enthusiasm wanes, then eventually turns to complete indifference. I've been and done a bazillion different things, but can't seem to land on any one thing that just feels "right". I knew I couldn't be the only one!!
In my case, I suffer from depression ( I live with a major depressive disorder) so it's sometimes difficult to differentiate between the anhedonia that this causes and any actual clear indicator that I'm on the wrong path/ just haven't yet found my niche. If you experience any depression then that may be the case for you also. At any rate, I get to the point where I wonder whether I have a niche at all; whether I belong on this planet at all, etc etc. It's disheartening, to say the least.
I realise you wrote this comment 6 months ago, so I am 99% prepared for not receiving a reply, but I hope you're going ok! I'd highly recommend Ken Robinson's talks on passion ( and his books). It's all a matter of identifying what YOUR passion is. I've found that looking outside the box of "what is my ideal career?" helps with this. Just think about what you really enjoy doing most. Then it's just a matter of figuring out how to turn this into a career :). (I've def had an epiphany in this regard...but now I'm overwhelmed as to the many steps involved with making that career happen. O.o ..but that's a whole other story.. )
@@3leggedsharkkickssurferinballs hey! Thanks for the reply. I have struggled with depression in the past, and I think it may be more tied to depression than autism, because my non autistic friend with depression has the same issue.
What I've been doing is just because I'm passionate about a lot of things is just sticking with a decision until I'm actually doing it, and then trying it out for a few years and seeing how it goes.
I really appreciate the book recommendation! I'll check him out :)
Hope the best for you!
@@Makealah Heya, no worries! Thankyou for noticing and responding to mine!
Yep, depression is so insidious. It would be especially tough to deal with in conjunction with something like Autism which can already make life a bit of a struggle at times. (Btw, I was diagnosed many years ago with something completely different, but the more I learn about Aspergers, the more I find myself relating to everything being said, so the subject is becoming an increasing source of fascination for me. I'm seriously at the point where I wonder if I was misdiagnosed. It'd explain a LOT! )
That's awesome. There's definitely something to be said for commitment! I think for a lot of us ( especially me!) there's this terrible fear of making the wrong decision then being "locked in" to that for the rest of our days. I suspect that in this way I actually create a self fulfilling prophecy by automatically assuming that the thing I'm embarking upon I'll inevitably hate in a few years time. I'm trying to remind myself that this doesn't have to be the case. I can, as you say, just decide to commit for a certain amount of time and not make such a big deal of it. I'm trying to see everything as a learning process rather than a goal in and of itself. I feel this is helping to take the pressure off.
Thankyou so much; it's lovely to connect and converse in such a friendly and polite way on the internet! Best of luck to you, also! Wishing you happiness and fulfillment!
@@3leggedsharkkickssurferinballs i completely relate to the way you feel about feeling locked in! Its a really scary feeling. Are you female by any chance? I know women are pretty frequently misdiagnosed. I went through a very similar process myself.
Mother & Support Advocate of an autistic learning disabled young adult son Here - thank you for your videos and advice
My son is 41 and is highly intelligent and has Aspergers. He lives with me and is very content with isolation. He hasn't had a girlfriend or date in over 10 years and is happy with that. He won't own a cell phone, doesn't like music, but does play video games, does research, and watches videos on UA-cam. He doesn't seem to be lonely at all. He only goes to get our groceries every 2 weeks in full COVID -19 protection gear and comes home and sprays everything with a diluted alcohol soultion and washes his clothes and coat.
I'm on the spectrum. I have 3 kids I homeschool (I'm self employed too) I can see how having autism effects my ability to parent in many ways. The biggest thing I deal with is that kids= sensory over load!
Yes indeed!! Thank you so much for the comment! Please subscribe to my channel to see more videos from me :).
I’m an autistic adult and I am about to move out of state in order to chase a dream I’ve always had. I am watching your videos in order to have strategy’s for the upcoming journey I’m about to take. Thank you and God bless.
I'm a self-diagnosed autistic adult. I'm accept as authentic by the local autism community and seeking a diagnosis.
Loneliness. I have no friends.
Hey you should join our Facebook group!! Link in description. Thank you so much for the comment! Make sure you are subscribed and have the notifications turned on :).
I've got diagnosed with ASD 2 4 months ago, I had kinda known for a while and had used your channel and others to help accept my being on the spectrum, thank you for all you do, ^_^
Oh hey that’s awesome. Thank you so much for the comment! Make sure you are subscribed and have the notifications turned on :).
FearnTuckerBentley you are being very unkind in this comment section. ASD 1&2 do exist, it is a fact.
My son has aspergers, he graduates in June and turns 18 in August. I'm looking for helpful tips to make the transition into adulthood easier.
Amazing, I hope I can help :). Thank you so much for the comment! Please subscribe to my channel to see more videos from me :).
Sylvia Pineda I’m in a very similar position, and if you live in the US like I do, and you live in a state with disability rehabilitation resources he may be eligible for help introducing him to whatever schooling or work environment he’ll be in next. There are also colleges with mentoring programs for people on the spectrum which help with scheduling and counseling and also a certain degree of attendance and performance monitoring, I think. I’d look also for social support groups for his age group, which I was able to find through the facility that provided the diagnosis. It was, and is, an uphill climb, and I’m still looking around, but it seems like once you’ve unlocked that first door others start to open. Slowly. So, so very slowly. Sometimes you have to pry at them a little, but they open.
Hi, I'm an autistic adult and I really appreciate your videos. Thank you so much. I have been having a hard time lately and you're so super helpful.
I am a mother of an autistic son. I appreciate all of what you have to say, it is so helpful.
It is so helpful to hear the strategies you use to deal with situations in every day life. I am the mom of a newly diagnosed 14 yr. Old boy with Autism 1.
I’m an autistic adult as well as having other disabilities too. I’ve never had a paid job sadly but done lots of volunteer work which I’ve loved. I really struggle with all different kinds of relationships, and just now learning how to communicate what I need and how not to be too much for other people. I obsess over so many things and that can scare people. Any tips on how not to obsess? X
Thank you so much for the comment! Please subscribe to my channel to see more videos from me :).
What sorts of things do you obsess over? Like small details?
Makealah Miller I obsess over fixing problems, animals, psychology and human health in general.
@@rachelannemarie25 i think in some situations those sorts of things would be seen as positive even by neurotypical folk. If you wanted to discuss more specific examples though (here or in a private message somewhere) I'd be happy to try to help you out with this.
Makealah Miller yeah private message would be good. Thank you much appreciated x