Timeless ETIQUETTE TIPS | Mastering Modern Ladylike Behavior

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  • Опубліковано 13 гру 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 72

  • @linamagdaleno9650
    @linamagdaleno9650 Рік тому +39

    I was taught as a child and also taught my children to ask a waiter if “I may please have”..(menu item) In the form of a question. I cannot believe the criticism I received from the people that were with me one evening. They laughed and joked and answered for the waiter with a prompt “no you cannot” in an attempt to be funny for asking instead of just telling! Nothing really shocks me anymore, it’s as though people were raised by wolves!

  • @KandiceElizabeth2
    @KandiceElizabeth2 Рік тому +44

    Marianna, you are so wise. I do not understand why everyone who has watched this video has not at least liked it. As someone living in the southern United States, I am appalled at the behavior of Americans at home and those who travel outside of the country.

    • @MarianaZelenjuk
      @MarianaZelenjuk  Рік тому +12

      Oh, if it was only Americans we’d have a better chance of fixing it, but I’m afraid it’s a global phenomena 😟

  • @Queen-ConsciousYa
    @Queen-ConsciousYa Рік тому +12

    Etiquette in the most simplest form is respect/compassion/consideration for yourself and others

  • @kimberlyperrotis8962
    @kimberlyperrotis8962 Рік тому +22

    I totally agree. Etiquette is about respect and thoughtfulness towards others, there’s nothing wrong with that. I always try to behave in a ladylike manner, it’s just the way I am. Making a big public scene, yelling, or swearing upset others, and we only feel worse for doing these things. Sometimes it’s best just to say nothing at all.

  • @cheryaljones9467
    @cheryaljones9467 9 місяців тому +5

    I totally agree about the earphones and the filming of others in public 😊😊
    But I also have an elderly animal that I have to use a stroller for, so I have sympathy for that. Also , for smaller animals that will fit in strollers allows owners to safely have their animals in public. The animals are restrained safely and are not a threat to other people.
    One of my issues is the holding of doors for others when entering or exiting.
    I have had so many doors slammed in my face because I mistakenly thought the person a head of me would hold the door.😂😂
    I attended Catholic elementary school and the nuns definitely had a part in teaching the rules of etiquette. I wish that public schools in America would teach something like this. It would be such a benefit for our children.🤩🇺🇲🙏

  • @kimberlyperrotis8962
    @kimberlyperrotis8962 Рік тому +13

    This is a little thing, but it can have a big impact. As we get older, we get some downward action on our faces that can give our neutral or concentrating expressions a grumpy look without actually reflecting any bad feeling at all. At age 63, remembering to smile makes people receive me as the happy, friendly, people-loving person I really am. I wasn’t a natural smiler originally, but it’s a nice and easy habit to pick up at any age. I also get lots of smiles in return, especially from children, which delights me. As a child, I was afraid of old people who seemed to be frowning, now I know they weren’t really, they were just old.

  • @beverlytaylor1745
    @beverlytaylor1745 Рік тому +6

    We were taught, "Your rights end where another's begin". 🙌

  • @pamelabarrera4192
    @pamelabarrera4192 Рік тому +9

    I love this topic!!.And I do think It's important. Recently my husband and I wanted to give our neighbours something nice in return for a gesture from them, so my husband suggested a bottle of wine, but we know they have a drinking problem behind doors so I told him "it would be very bad taste to give them a bottle of wine 😮" so we ended up giving them a basket with cheese instead.

  • @agataczajkowski1096
    @agataczajkowski1096 Рік тому +13

    Another great video!
    I have 2 extra etiquette additions:
    I don’t think we should be asking for salt and pepper as a guest at the table, I’m assuming that the host cooked all the dishes according to the best way she/he thought they supposed to taste and altering the taste will somehow let them know that there is something wrong with food. If condiments are not offered and displayed on the table I don’t think we should be asking for them (keep in mind that restaurant etiquette is different and you can probably ask for something extra when you are paying for your meal)
    Second one is referring to someone saying “she said….give her that…..show it to her….., at this point if we are in company of few people we should be referring to them by their name, so for example Sally said, instead of she said, show this to Sally, give it to Sally…..and so on. Somehow using she or he where the actual person is there and we know their name just sounds wrong.

  • @JennySpadaro
    @JennySpadaro Рік тому +5

    Etiquette is always about making others feel comfortable. Even simple things like not chewing with your mouth open. When everyone knows the rules of simple things it makes everyone more at ease. Losing these kindnesses is really a detriment to any society. And as cultures become more obsessed with self it’s no wonder etiquette has fell by the wayside.

  • @kimberlyperrotis8962
    @kimberlyperrotis8962 Рік тому +9

    Don’t ask someone if their jewelry, etc., is “real” or how much things cost. There’s a relative by marriage who always asks me these things about everything I wear, it’s so embarrassing. I just don’t know how to respond, so I try to change the subject, but she persistently insists. I wish she wouldn’t ask at all, it’s such an intrusion, but she seems a bit obsessed with what I wear. One time she said “I’m so glad you’re wearing a skirt, too, I didn’t know if it would be ok”. What the heck? I don’t care what other people wear, I don’t even notice most of the time, I just wear what I want to. It’s not a compliment, she usually makes negative comments, if anything.

    • @Echolyris212
      @Echolyris212 Рік тому +2

      This reminded me of a woman I worked with and she was always just very rude. Once she asked me about a pearl necklace I had on, she then touched it and said “oh it’s real” but in the rudest way as if she was so shocked that I could wear real pearls. This was many many years ago. I can laugh about it now😂.

    • @Echolyris212
      @Echolyris212 Рік тому +3

      But what it sounds like is this woman admires your style and unfortunately isn’t going about it the correct way. The skirt situation I took as if YOU are wearing it to said event then it MUST be ok and she did good for knowing how to dress for the occasion. Sounds as if she doesn’t have a lot of confidence in herself and style and is following your lead. That was my take from the situation but, I also I’m not there so who knows🤷🏻‍♀️

    • @HarrisPilton789
      @HarrisPilton789 Рік тому +1

      Have you tried telling her that it’s impolite to ask someone how much something costs?

  • @teresahalliday3680
    @teresahalliday3680 Рік тому +7

    I think good manners and etiquette should be observed and are sorely lacking in these times. People are so lax, dress like slobs, and act they there is no one but them so they are free to do what they want. I come from a different generation and find this decline so sad. Thank you for this video!!

  • @autumnespresso
    @autumnespresso Рік тому +17

    I have to agree with everything yet again! One of my biggest pet peeves is, when people don't use headphones especially in public places! I have had it a few times that people who were age 50+ sat in a restaurant and showed something that was on their phone to each other and they had their phone volume up so everyone could hear it, but they die not bother to try and get the volume down again, they just went with the noise.. I really don't know how anyone can be this stupid!🙄

    • @MarianaZelenjuk
      @MarianaZelenjuk  Рік тому +2

      I wouldn’t say stupid, but just completely lacking in self awareness! I’m sure people don’t mean any harm when they’re rude like this, but it’s the lack of respect for others’ personal space that gets to me 😤

    • @autumnespresso
      @autumnespresso Рік тому +1

      @@MarianaZelenjuk exactly!

    • @JaanaG2005
      @JaanaG2005 Рік тому

      Haha, people of 50 - or even above, my mother is 88 - don't often have to turn up volume on their phones. (Even you wrote, its happened to you only a few times.) Hearing loss of course, can happen at any age. But what to me is rude, is to having a phone out of their bags at all in a restaurant. Only at an emergency. Headphones in a restaurant? Now that is a sight! When it comes to etiquette.

  • @celiathirlwall3329
    @celiathirlwall3329 Рік тому +4

    Wonderful video, Mariana! We all need reminding how to act in public! It's common decency and shows respect towards yourself and others! Bravo!!

  • @BelleColetti
    @BelleColetti 8 місяців тому +1

    i am 23 and forgot most of my etiquette ways taught since childhood. i come from new york so i subjected myself to act loose and laidback however i am meeting my soon to be in laws and i wish to be more poise and respectful to those around me especially because they are extremely old fashion, i am doing the best i can to educate myself and remind myself how to hold a knife and fork. this video was so insightful, wise, refreshing and witty. thank you mariana.

    • @MarianaZelenjuk
      @MarianaZelenjuk  8 місяців тому

      Oh, good luck meeting your in-laws! I'm sure you'll make a great first impression 😌

  • @jessgriffith2678
    @jessgriffith2678 Рік тому +1

    Thank you! This was enjoyable to watch and helpful. I’m glad you feel the same in keeping etiquette. God bless x

  • @palomahealing5073
    @palomahealing5073 Рік тому +2

    That's why I stopped showing Cleavage, period and stopped wearing "Trendy" clothes altogether. I've since been wearing the Classic style. Ever since my friends husband a few years ago made a remark to her that I was trying to show my "best attributes"? And of course, that's a Man's mind..🤨 (they get the wrong impression!) That also shows a Man your Physical aspect, and thus ignore the Woman as her person inside!

  • @kimberlyperrotis8962
    @kimberlyperrotis8962 Рік тому +4

    Understanding table setting and etiquette gives one confidence to eat decently in any situation. If in doubt, follow what the hostess or host does. I finally gave up on the, actually casual, practice of including the dessert course utensils in the place setting. Every single person, trying to be helpful, piled these onto their dirty dinner plates before dessert. At a family dinner, I even said to leave them, but they still didn’t. It’s more work, but I ended up bringing out the silverwear for dessert after the main course is cleared. At least I don’t have to wash all the formerly clean, but unused, dessert silverware again. If you don’t know what some the silverwear, plates or glasses are for, leave them on the table, it’s for a later course. The hostess or server will clear unused ones at the right time. Offer to help, but don’t just do stuff, things get screwed up this way. I’ve had things I really needed thrown away by Ms. Helpful. Once I had to hire an electrician to get my garage lights working again. It turned out that some “helpful” person had climbed up, and turned each fixture off at the top of it, instead of using the main wall switch. I didn’t even know they had these switches so far above my head, so it didn’t occur to me to check. Mr. Helpful cost me a whole day of messing around, waiting for the electrician, and a wasted $300. Thanks a lot! Mr. and Mrs. Helpful always brought my mail upstairs at every visit, so I had to take it right back down to the ground floor where I deal with it in my office and where my recycling bin and shredder are. Don’t assume you know what people want, ask them.

    • @raegen5618
      @raegen5618 11 місяців тому

      🤔🤔🤔🤔

  • @GO-ku5pv
    @GO-ku5pv Рік тому +3

    I love this! Thank you for posting this. Life would be so much better if we all acted in a more humane way and respected others. And while doing so we are respecting ourselves. You are so classy! Thank you😊

  • @teresabecker1078
    @teresabecker1078 Рік тому +4

    You are such a lovely woman, a breath of fresh air. Your message is greatly appreciated by me.

  • @MorenitaBonita19
    @MorenitaBonita19 Рік тому +7

    Loved this! Our society would be better off if more people followed this 🙏🏽✨

  • @williamkazak469
    @williamkazak469 Рік тому +1

    Worthwhile video. I can add, don't let anyone pull you into an argument with them. Some people need conflict to exist. Think about it. You do not need to respond. It could get very aggressive as well as a waste of precious energy. In Chicago, it is a custom to not put ketchup on a hot dog! Seems so ancient of a belief but the fanatics may crucify you if you do that. I love your videos. Thank you for these etiquette reminders. I just thought of something that puzzels me. In America there is are local Italian resturants called Olive Garden. The contradiction is that no Itlian works there! What?

  • @imadina31
    @imadina31 Рік тому +2

    Just discovered your channel via this video ! I'm so happy and excited to see the others 😍

  • @KMMK2371
    @KMMK2371 Рік тому +1

    Great video! Love your sense of humour too! Do you have a link to the etiquette rules that you saved to your phone? Pet peeve: when you give someone a compliment and they say, "Oh, I know", or "ya" or they look at you in silence like you're an alien from another planet. 🙄

  • @lizvardon5357
    @lizvardon5357 Рік тому

    Thank you so much for sharing these etiquette rules. So very thoughtful, l agree whole heartedly, sometimes we simply need reminding. Going lookbat your earlier video now ❤

  • @anablazoniene2068
    @anablazoniene2068 Рік тому +3

    Agree with the most points, except last strory with Parmegiano cheese, if a guest in our house would ask for their food with cheese, would we judge them? I think that it is bad manners actually to insist that everybody else has to eat and drink as an italian, especially as a tourist you are a paying customer and not just a guest, so I think the waiter was in the wrong giving you the look and whispering about you behind your back. Individual tastes and preferences have to be respected also

    • @MarianaZelenjuk
      @MarianaZelenjuk  Рік тому +1

      I absolutely agree that the waiter was rude, Ana... he made me feel terrible. But had I known about this little rule I'd at least not have been caught so off-guard. If it was my own home, I'd absolutely try to make my guest happy!

  • @christinekellyrose9435
    @christinekellyrose9435 Рік тому +2

    One of your best videos...keep them co.ing😊

  • @JodieRichardson-wf3qp
    @JodieRichardson-wf3qp 15 днів тому

    Thank you so much my dear you've helped me a lot and I'm a Middle aged female

  • @carlsenlifeafter60carlsen11
    @carlsenlifeafter60carlsen11 Рік тому +5

    I was taught as a child to say please and thank you and to eat properly at the table etc. also to stand up straight. My brother used to just bring home fast food and give it to his two girls and they would just sit and eat at wherever. I was, so appalled by this that I taught them how to set a table and eat properly, they acted like I was teaching them a foreign language. Manners all kinds of conservative behavior has seemed to me like it’s out the window ,people these days are so lazy they don’t teach their children anything. It’s a sad way to live.😢 I set my table with a beautiful table cloth and used my China every day. Life is too short not to use you’re beautiful things .every day. Every day I am alive is a special occasion so why not use it??

  • @katherinebaer6798
    @katherinebaer6798 Рік тому +2

    This was such a good recipe for class, which is sadly lacking in today’s society. You are so cute and wise for your very young age!

  • @humanhumanity1752
    @humanhumanity1752 8 місяців тому

    Proper etiquette, perfect man.

  • @AnjaliSharma-ob2os
    @AnjaliSharma-ob2os Рік тому

    Thanks for this video ❤

  • @picturepal
    @picturepal Рік тому

    It is an art! I appreciate your passion

  • @Semifinished
    @Semifinished 3 місяці тому

    For everyone out there who wants to improve your etiquette habits and keep living correctly, I would recommend reading book called Manners Matter by Amanita Thomas. She is talking behind industry and knowledge.

  • @palomahealing5073
    @palomahealing5073 Рік тому

    Talking about Etiquette? I remember well..a couple of years ago meeting here in Las Vegas a Couple of Man & Wife, both Medical doctors from Brazil? And the woman was wearing a Bodycon dress without a Bra, or Underwear. Also her Husband also seemed to not to be wearing anything underneath either? These 2 were very Wealthy, well to do long time friends of my EX Brother-in-Law, and I commented to him about this, and he said that they always dress this way, as the Beach in Brazil is only minutes away and this is always their Style?😳 I'm from Miami, and yes we tend to wear Cut offs, cropped tops and shorts a lot of the time, but we do wear our under garmets the whole time away from the Beach🤔 Can you explain this Style to me? Is this true about the Rich & Wealthy in Brazil?

  • @HLB512
    @HLB512 Рік тому +7

    What I’m going to say won’t be popular, nonetheless, I’m saying it anyway.
    Don’t mock or sneer at people with autism in public or actually anyone that appears different than yourself. It will make you appear to be the one who lacks manners or any form of class.

  • @carlaruiz4584
    @carlaruiz4584 Рік тому +6

    Listening to music (or watching TikTok videos) without headphones is the worst! 😖

  • @bibigems
    @bibigems Рік тому +5

    Most Americans could stand to learn manners. The term "bad manners" is not used anymore.

  • @nicolew6342
    @nicolew6342 10 місяців тому

    Please keep making these videos and teaching people how to behave in public because since the pandemic people act extra weird now.

  • @iris7911
    @iris7911 9 місяців тому

    You made me laugh with your shrimp pasta-parmigiano story :) BUT, if we can agree that you didn't know the local etiquette rule and it was a bit awkward, they could have been more discreet and forgiving... what are etiquette rules without elegant behavior...?

  • @elpapito24529
    @elpapito24529 Рік тому +1

    I have a question... In this context of etiquette. How would I go about dealing with people when I introduce myself?
    Whenever I'm at a gathering/social event and people introduce themselves and say where they are from. And for example someone introduces themselves say "I'm Mike from Canada" . Things keep ongoing.
    But when it's my turn and I say "My name is Jay and I'm front {insert third world country}"
    people start going "Owwwwwwwwww things are crazy there OMG can you tell me about X Y Z how does this and that works...
    So I have tried to deal with this situation in many ways but I still don't find a way where the "party" can keep on going instead of people looking me like a refugee

    • @MarianaZelenjuk
      @MarianaZelenjuk  Рік тому +1

      I TOTALLY understand what you’re saying. Coming from Brazil, I sometimes get that same reaction. My trick is to find a way of turning the conversation to a more positive topic, such as “yes, the corrupt political environment is a mess, but I have to say the people are the loveliest and the food is amazing”. Then give an example and go from there 😊

    • @elpapito24529
      @elpapito24529 Рік тому

      Thank you for the answer didn't serve me much since where I'am from is not too redimible to say them positive things. But I can see how it could be useful for other nationalities.

  • @chinchillin6280
    @chinchillin6280 Рік тому

    If you had a masterclass/class seminar on etiquette, I’d fly to Italy in a drop of a hat 😂

  • @hannaht4683
    @hannaht4683 Рік тому +4

    Etiquette from Texas: if someone cooks a steak for you it is insulting to them to ask for a sauce (ketchup, A1, etc).

    • @MarianaZelenjuk
      @MarianaZelenjuk  Рік тому

      Didn’t know that! How interesting 🙂

    • @americafirst9144
      @americafirst9144 Рік тому

      Yes, but shouldn't a good hostess offer it?

    • @bibigems
      @bibigems Рік тому

      Yes it is.

    • @hannaht4683
      @hannaht4683 Рік тому

      @@americafirst9144 No, just like the example she used in Rome of asking for cheese. They didn't offer her cheese.

  • @fanny.07
    @fanny.07 10 місяців тому

    make up tuts pls

  • @cheryaljones9467
    @cheryaljones9467 9 місяців тому

    Etiquette=Respect
    Many people do not respect themselves much less other people.

  • @BestOutdoorFun
    @BestOutdoorFun Рік тому

    Here is a etiquette lesson we did: ua-cam.com/video/Y-THWpv2vlg/v-deo.html

  • @Citrus1992m
    @Citrus1992m Рік тому +1

    Wait, I have to know-did you add the parmesan to your pasta after all that? 😅

    • @MarianaZelenjuk
      @MarianaZelenjuk  Рік тому

      I didn't.. I felt so uncomfortable and ashamed that I didn't even touch the little parmesan dish 😂