Things Parents Swear By (& if they worked for us!)
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- Опубліковано 18 чер 2024
- There is a LOT of parenting advice out there and a lot of things that parents swear by. In this video, I want to go through things I've seen other parents absolutely swear by when it comes to their children and whether or not they're things Dan and I have done... and if they worked for us. Do you swear by any of these things? Let me know in the comments!
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Jessica Kellgren-Fozard’s video on elimination communication: • How I potty trained my...
CHAPTERS
00:00 - Intro
02:15 - Co-Sleeping/Bed Sharing
04:06 - Side Lying Breastfeeding
06:05 - Baby Wearing
08:02 - Reusable Nappies
10:55 - Bedtime Routine
13:34 - White Noise
14:17 - Reusable Wipes
15:02 - Star Wrap
15:32 - Swaddle Bags
16:19 - Introducing a Bottle at the Same Time as Breastfeeding
17:40 - Next to Me Crib
18:40 - Baby Sleeping Bags
19:22 - Getting Everything I Can Second Hand
19:29 - Baby Massage
20:00 - Baby Sensory Classes
20:37 - Baby Potty-ing
21:09 - Baby Signing
21:33 - Outro
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There is also a big difference between a routine and a schedule. You can just have the order of things in the evening be similar every time. There is no point in being like "child, it's 7 pm. In bed. Now!" :D
Yes 100%!!
100% agree!! However, we are schedule people the first half of the day because my toddler has preschool BUT the rest of the day is routine! I miss the days that we could just be routine based and time wasn’t as big of an influence on our day 😂
Completely agree. We've always paid more attention to wake windows and routines than to times on the clock. Although that make be why we still haven't completely made the daylight savings time change in our house 😛
Because you mentioned Baby Signing on this, maybe Jessica Kellgren-Fozard's video in that could also be interesting. She talks about the difference between teaching a baby sign language as a second or first language and the trend of Baby Sign, which she considered cultural appropriation of Deaf culture. I think she also mentioned that they offer a baby signing song class that her wife has to go to with Rupert because it isn't Deaf accessible.
My Nana, who had four children, always listens to parents now (my brother has recently become a parent) talking about resuables vs. disposables with total bemusement. As she said, she and her friends never had a choice - disposable nappies didn't exist when she had babies. It's remarkable how much the demands and conveniences of modern life lead us away from older methods as too difficult, imperfect, and inconvenient, when actually people were raising babies in reusable nappies for a very long time before disposables came along.
Like Hannah said if both parents are working and out of the house then it's just not doable. Plus the gas and electric needed to get everything washed/dried isn't affordable for many people.
We swear by baby led weaning. Neither of my kids ever ate exclusively purees, at 6 months we just started giving them age appropriate foods. It is definitely messy and can be a little bit scary, but my now 3yo still eats really well and my 9 month old has been eating 3 solid meals a day for a couple of months already. It's great for getting them to eat what you eat, to be able and willing to try new things, and is also great for learning those fine motor skills!
Definitely agree - recommend a messy mat to catch the dropped food!
Quite agree my daughter didn’t start weaning until she was 10 months old. She now’s 3.8 years and eats almost everything but will try everything.
@@Victoriasm31 a mat works well, we used one for my 3yo. Now with my younger one we have a dog, which works even better 😋
Agree 100%. My daughter eats pretty much anything because we have given her a variety of foods from the beginning.
I loved Baby Led Weaning, thought I had acquired a brilliant eater... Then she became a toddler and decided she didn't like any of it 😂 she is getting way better now but it's slow progress. I know kids raised on puree who will now eat anything so you never know I guess
I started to introduce some sign language when baby was like 9 months old, very simple but useful things like "more" and "all done" and "book", as the months go by she picks up words and signs more quickly. I highly recommend introducing a few signs because it's wonderful to communicate and avoid a lot of frustrations.
For any American viewers, roughly speaking, UK king sized bed = US queen and UK super king is a bit smaller than US regular king.
So Hannah's bed size statements in American sizes would be that a queen sized bed feels small with Rowan, but a king-sized bed worked well.
- An American living in the UK
Thanks! :)
I strongly suggest sign language for any age kids! My 4.5 year old, who speaks incredibly well, still will sign when overwhelmed, crying hard, or otherwise having a hard time speaking. My 2 year old also signs, which helps us understand the words they're trying to say in the times where their spoken words aren't super clear.
Love this! The only recommendation I truly swear by is acknowledging that every baby and family is different, and encouraging people to trust their instincts. :)
Also: caring for a newborn is really hard and will get easier as time passes. No need to add worrying about what one might be doing wrong to the mix, especially by comparing to "easier " babies.
Realising this really helped me feel more relaxed and confident.
These work(ed) great for us: bed sharing (to stay sane), elimination communication (mostly offering the potty after naps - so fun when we catch a pee/poo), baby wearing (sling for my partner, carrier for me), white noise (to soothe him to sleep or drown other noise during naps), Side Lying Breastfeeding (lifesaver! ), second hand (love that we get to connect to other parents this way, and often get extra tips)
The schedule vs. no schedule thing is so different for different families! I personally get overwhelmed staring down a whole day of unstructured care-giving, so knowing when I can make loose plans for activities and when I can expect a break is a nice anchor. But I know lots of people who feel stressed when the schedule gets "off" (which it always does!) and they're happier after they let go and just go with the flow. Babies can absolutely be healthy and happy either way
Getting rid of our reusable nappies was the best move for us. The stress of trying to make it work, the washing and struggling to get them dry in time (in my climate). Admitting that it wasn't for us and looking for other ways to save the planet was the right choice for us.
We bought some, really wanted to. Then there was a disability that meant bottles, nasogastric tubes. Something had to give. Disposables saved my sanity.
I swear by wake windows, but always adapted to child and family. Follow your own path!
I'm completely into the reusable wipes. We've never been able to do reusable nappies because the flat is to small to wash and dry them but the wipes go straight from the washing machine to the box without having to dry. They're also so much better that disposable in terms of how much they clean and amazing for weaning. THE BEST
Agreed!! Any time I have to use disposable wipes to change a nappy I find it a real pain 😂
We love our resuable wipes too! We've got two sets from cheeky wipes and would really recommend. Got to get some face ones once my baby starts weaning!
It’s so interesting how different all babies can be. I was slept so much more than my sister that my mom called the hospital to ask if there was something wrong…but I just liked to sleep😂
Haha loll
People give me such funny looks when I say "we had a great night... He only fed twice" 🤣 what's with people's obsession with asking if they're sleeping through?
Right!?!! That's practically a full night's sleep! 😆
Yes! Hate constantly getting asked if baby sleeps through!
Of course most of them don't.
If people want to show they care, I'd much rather they asked an open-ended question on how I'm feeling.
Before reading these comments, I didn't know anyone considered getting up twice during the night a positive. They just don't know anything less than sleeping through the night could be deemed good. :P Lol
Something that I didn’t realize about washable diapers (before we started using them) was how bulky they are. You have to size up clothes or change the style of clothes so they fit over the cloth diaper.
I suffered badly with nighttime anxiety with my first baby, so a routine became my anchor. We did all the scheduled naps, white noise, sleeping bags etc. I dont know if its helped my babies but it has helped me! I do think we have been lucky with 2 good sleepers though. Also routine is good for toddlers, if they are having a meltdown you can bring it back with a familiar routine. Ergh parenting is a mine field you just have to do what suits your family!
Thank you for saying this about routines! I had the same reaction when I read them online. I have to keep reminding myself that every baby is different and we have to do what works for us.
I love planning and routines, but I didn’t start getting any kind of routine until about 6 months or so, and now she just naturally has her rhythm…
Hannah, love your videos, been following a long time, but I wish I had been following for even longer! Would you consider making a video on (or have you made a video on that I missed?) how you decided to have a child and maybe even talking to others about how they made this decision. It feels so important and so rarely talked about! I know you mentioned a book on it once!
If you want to give the cloth nappies another go I'd recommend buying a set of the 2 layer Little lamb bamboo boosters and adding them to the pocket of the nappy (particularly towards the front as he's a boy). Bambino Mio's are not the most absorbent nappies out there, and the leaking is probably because he's out wetting them now. Bamboo is very absorbent (trade off is it takes longer to dry) so if you stick a bamboo booster in it will add a lot more absorbency, and give you a chance to test out if that was the issue. The Little Lamb ones are great, and not too expensive either. Otherwise as you say make sure any liner is tucked in, and that the fit is nice and snug around his legs. :)
Agree! Use more layers for insert :D
This was such a great video and a good reminder that all babies are just so different! I love the white noise machine and the sleep sacks (or as you call them baby sleeping bags, weird US vs UK difference!), largely because as they get to be toddlers, it's a cue that they really understand. So even if the schedule is off and you're pushing nap/bedtime or trying to do it ten minutes earlier/later for the time change, something in their little brains switches to rest mode with the sound machine and the sleep sack. Plus, at least in the US, blankets aren't considered to be safe sleep practice until they're like 18 to 24 mo.
Love this video! You frame this brilliantly in that these things are must haves for some, and they may or may not work for you and others. It's the thing I think most people should know about parenting before going into it! Your experience will be entirely individual to you and your baby. There are no hard and fast rules.
I was so nervous about bedsharing with my first even though I always intended to. He just seemed so small!! By the time I had my second though my parenting instincts were fully established and we bedshared from day 1. I have slept *so much better* with this baby than my first. Granted, I was lucky to have a baby who slept well as long as he got regular boob, but the difference in not constantly sitting up, trying to put down, being unable to was immense.
Babywearing is absolutely hand in hand for me with bedsharing. Couldn't do without it. I use woven wraps and while it was a learning curve they are so incredibly versatile. I can do so many different things depending on why I want to carry him, I can carry my 1yo or nearly 4yo. Brilliant things!
I think Jessica mentioned that "baby sign" is mostly just nonsense, and that it leads to childcarers who only know "baby sign" to misunderstand her son who actually speaks BSL.
So, probably not a bad thing that it fell out of use for you. If I ever raise a child from infancy, I do want to incorporate sign language, but I want to learn the sign language first. Like, really learn it.
Same. Came to the comments to say this.
@@vallentinac9513 The baby sign that I go to is all BSL with maybe a few alterations to make it easier for them to sign. The classes we attend are TinyTalk.
@@quirkykido If it's BSL (or any sign language), it's okay. Otherwise it's appropriation.
Thank you for the video, I absolutely adore how sometimes you say "we did this because it was useful to me" parents' wellbeing is essential too ❤
My parents had both me and my brother on a routine, and it really worked. They were less about precise timings, more that bath book and bed were approximately the same time every night - my parents always said it was 12 hours flat out (busy busy), 12 hours flat out (passed out asleep). It just made life easier especially as my mum was back to full time work when I was 4 months old, and my dad only had the two weeks paternity leave (might have been a bit longer as I was born two weeks before Christmas, my birthday is on Monday). So long as I had enough food in me and enough naps so I wasn’t a grumpy little gremlin (I’m horrible even now when I’m tired) they were like, good, let’s get the ‘wee one’ to bed
haha that sounds so cute, like you're remembering it and giving your review 😄 (ps. happy birthday! 🎉)
@@justathumb my parents knew what they were doing! I liked my sleep and my grub
One note on reusable nappies: i wanted to use them so badly but we had leaks over leaks. When baby was 5mo, i talked to a consultant. BM is mostly microfiber, try some booster. If you want to experiment use: Close Popin (uk, snap in bamboo inserts), Hamac (hybrid, can be used with any inserts, made in France), or any pocket / shell diaper with hemp+microfiber or double bamboo inserts (from 4mo up, 8-10layers should be used!) Dont give up! You can do it 💪
Anybody else’s baby require cuddles to sleep and stay asleep like you don’t have to hold them but they have to have all their limbs on you 😂
not a parent, but my friends baby (now toddler) really got use out of the sign language (not baby sign, but actual signs) both before he could speak, and still does. And, as someone who learned a bit of sign language due to having a disabled friend in pre-school, I can confidently say that I still remember many signs I learned and it's among my most fond memories of my childhood. I have tried to learn more as an adult, but stuff doesn't really stick anymore
A good tip re reusable wipes to save money, i had a massive brushed cotton sheet/muslin and cut it up into squares and they worked great :)
Best thing about reusable wipes is they can go straight from the washing machine into the box to be used, because you keep them wet you don't have to faff with drying etc. Struggling to get our heads around cloth nappies but used Cheeky Wipes from day one and love them 🙌
We didn't swaddle because we were told not to, but we used a sleeping bag with sleeves from a few months in and it was great. My baby kept throwing off blankets while sleeping and then getting cold and waking up, so the sleeping bag completely fixed that.
We tried the reusable nappies, got loads of them, but stopped using them after they consistently leaked. We just didn't seem to get it right, and changing his whole outfit multiple times a day was not fun. It also generated so much washing.
The reusable wipes however, best buy we have had! We only use disposable wipes when out and about, which means in the last 6 months we have only bought about 2 packs of wipes (currently on the 2nd one). We went with cheeky wipes mainly and some from boots, and we love them :)
With washing them, because they are so small, if you have enough of them you don't need to do it as often. They get thrown in when there is enough for a full load of other washing.
I do find the mucky box with cheeky wipes is small enough, so we only put poopy wipes in there and we have a little plastic box we throw the ones we use when it's just a wet nappy.
hannah ur top is lovely do u know where u got it / the brand? also great video, i am 20 and have no kids lol but always find these interesting to watch! x
We've never had a strict schedule with our son but i will always swear by a good bedtime routine!! Life saver from 3-4 months onwards
SO EXCITED!!!🎄🎄🎅🏻💚🎄❤️🎄🎄🎅🏻❤️❤️❤️💚💚🎅🏻💚🎄🎄❤️💚🎅🏻🎅🏻🎅🏻💚🎄❤️❤️💚🎅🏻🎅🏻💚🎄❤️🎄💚🎅🏻🎅🏻🎄🎄💚🎅🏻🎅🏻💚🎄
Sesame street was our saving grace. There were so many times when she wouldn't sleep and we were completely exhausted and at the end of our rope. We'd turn on Sesame street and she would just quietly watch. I know there are a lot of people who avoid screens and I thought I would be one of those people, but sometimes I just needed to get some work done or pee. Lol
Parenting is hard!
Most people are 'better' parents when they haven't had kids yet - it's easy when it's only theory. ;)
In practice, many things are not as we imagined. But we do our best, and that's good enough.
YOUR THE BEST HANNAH! 💚🎄🎅🏻🎅🏻❤️🎄🎄🎄❤️🎅🏻🎅🏻🎅🏻❤️🎄🎄🎄🎄❤️🎅🏻🎅🏻❤️🎄🎄🎄❤️🎅🏻❤️🎄🎄❤️🎅🏻🎅🏻🎄💚🎄❤️🎅🏻❤️🎄
As someone who has worked with young children I definitely agree that babies are individuals, what works for some will not work for others. My one concern is that the star wrap shown in the video has a hoodie which could be an issue for safe sleeping if the baby falls asleep whilst wearing it.
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Since you're using reusable nappies also using reusable wipes is easy as you can wash them all together! We have cheeky wipes and love them, you can get handy clean/mucky tubs.
My almost 5yo cosleeps with us. Once she went into a toddler bed at 3, she came in whenever she woke up. Now she just sleeps in with us. We sleep through. She sleeps through. We figure she won't sleep with us at 10... it started when she was in ICU at 3 months and they asked me to hop in to her bed and she settled with me over the morphine...
I "swear by" having the small child sleep in the MIDDLE of the bed. Rowan takes over your side, so you scoot to Dan's side, and he's on the floor. That was happening with us (my two year old likes to come climb in bed with us in the middle of the night). Moving her to the middle helped TONS. No one is worried about her falling out, so we snuggle right against her and no one is forced out of the bed.
Yes! Try reusable wipes! BIG fan of them. I reckon washable diapers are not for everybody, although we are big fans of them. But washable wipes are a gamechanger, they work SOOO much better than the disposable ones. Also, I understand that you are a bit intimidated by the washable diapers. Maybe you can book a consult? Here in the Netherlands there are some company's that offer them for free. My tips are: look into boosters if diapers are leaking, get a nice and big double wetbag or two for clean and dirty diapers on the go, and get into a good washing routine. Me and my partner both work 4 days a week, I do all the diaper laundry. It seems daunting at first, but I have a good routine now and it has become so easy. Right now I do a diaper wash every two days, because of the cold weather it takes them a bit longer to dry. In summer I wash every three days. With washing, hanging and folding all together, it takes me 15min a day at most!
Totally agree - reusable wipes are a game changer, and they are much better at getting things clean than disposable wipes. Also they dry much, much faster than reusable nappy inserts (v important when you live in a flat trying to do cloth 😅)
What helped us in our washing routine is that we combine a 60c wash with towels etc with a diaper/wipes wash. First you put in the diapers and wipes and start a rinse cycle (COLD!) then after the poo and pee is rinsed of we put the towels etc! In and we run the full cycle. This means one wash every 3 days for us.
Also if you use your dryer it is still more eco friendly to use reuseables! Might make it easier.
But don’t feel like it’s a waste! Every time u use a washable diaper is one less diaper in the bin! That’s a win already. Also the diaper can go for a round 2 with another baby so they will be used eventuely! 🙏🏻😜
Cheeky reusable wipes are amazing, would recommend. We just lob the dirty ones in with a normal 40 degree wash (not a separate wash). We use them at home but wet wipes in changing bag
I got a sibling when I was 11 years old and my parents got a baby carrier and I was allowed to carry my sister I loved it it was so fun
I will just say on elimination communication - it doesn't teach your baby to go potty earlier, and working in childcare and having seen a lot of it in the quite modern and wealthy area I'm working in, we still have to potty train the children exactly the same as those who haven't done it. So personally, I think it's just more work for the parents and another thing to feel superior/inferior about if you let it, but that's just from my experience.
I'm sure it's different w everyone. I personally thought I was doing a lot of extra work but it paid off because at 18 months she just took over. W less accidents then I can count on one hand. So glad I did it but can't claim another child would have had the exact results. I worked daycare and it was tough.
@@autismenlightenment I really am glad you felt it worked for you. I will just add that my toddler toilet trained at 18 months without issue despite having never been introduced to toileting through anything more than watching us go. I have EC children who are struggling with the toilet and going to school this coming year. It really depends on the individual.
I actually think the future with nappies is more towards biodegradable nappies rather than reusable ones. Like there are ones made from bamboo and im sure others I havent heard of.
The childcare centre I work at is actually switching to biodegradable/compostable nappies and wipes early next year as essentially a test run centre for a small brand. I feel it’s even more important for corporations and childcare centres to be as eco friendly as possible than it is individuals(of course individuals also contribute but corporations make up most of the sales for products they use regularly and have a much bigger footprint than individuals)
Jessica Kellgren-Fozard uses bamboo ones with her little one and in 18 months I don’t think they’ve had an issue.
Thing that worked amazingly for me.
Frozen banana when little one is teething ( as long as they are old enough for food) it also encourages baby led weaning
I agree with almost all this! I do have to say be careful facing babe out while wearing because it can cause hip dysplasia! Babe should be facing you with legs in an M shape! I really recommend wrap you in love as a guide 💜
Do you have a recommendation for babies who are 'over' facing in and really want to look out onto the world while also being carried?
And actually, I thought facing out wearing didn't cause hip dysplasia but rather would not help improve any undiagnosed hip issues, as spending time in the M shape would be the recommended treatment. Do correct me if I'm wrong - thanks!
@@carinen8119 i really recommend a high back carry for kids wanting a good look around! They should be able to see over your shoulders. My son loved that. Also it’s just really bad for overall development but if you use google you can have a good read about what it can do.
In addition to high back carry, hip carries (in woven wraps) are amazing! Woven wraps have a learning curve, but they’re so versatile once you’re comfortable with them.
I swear by the love to dream swaddle. My little one was miserable when we tried to swaddle her arms down and we thought she was just not a very "good sleeper" (whatever that means for babies 😅). But as soon as we tried out the love to dream arms up swaddle sleep sack, it was a DREAM. first so mich quicker than a swaddle blanket and she was just so happy to have her arms up by her face. Very much recommend for parents who think there baby might benefit!!
Here is my experience with most of these:
We have a regular double bed and have done a lot of bed sharing 😅 in fact our daughter is 4 now and she still comes in the middle of the night and gets in the bed. And now we have a cat who wants to sleep in there too!
Our daughter was not really a fan of being in a sling/carrier even though everyone told us she would love it. There were times it were it was super helpful though. I feel like it's an essential thing but better to borrow or buy secondhand.
I was also determined to try reusable nappies but I completely failed due to being extremely ill for months after she was born and having to go for the easy option instead. We did then use some occasionally and often overnight but we did have leak issues too. I like the reusable wipes but I use them way more for myself than the kid.
White noise/heartbeat things did nothing as far as I could tell 😂 she hated being swaddled and just wanted to escape! She had to have a few bottles due to feeding issues and me being severely exhausted but she wasn't really a fan and got to a point where she just didn't want them at all.
We had a Snuzpod which similar to a Next2Me and agree it was great. We liked sleeping bags too.
My daughter also hated baby carriers! I spent loads of money on an expensive one as everyone said it was an essential and that she would love it. But she would scream every time we attempted to put her in it!
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There are definitely things I would do again with another baby - loved doing bottles, baby carrier, purees first, using a moses basket so we could carry him around the house. But the actual things I swear by are:
- Every baby is different.
- If they are genetically related to you, chances are they will do the things you do and respond to things that work for you.
- Just listen to and pay attention to your baby and what they are doing. You will learn to recognise their cues and needs, so just focus on paying attention to your baby and their needs, and just ask for help if you need it.
- Know and understand risks, and then do what works for you and your family to prioritise what you all need the most.
Ugh I wish I could have been able to baby wear more. After my pregnancy I really struggled with a bad back and wasn’t able to walk for a few weeks post partum. I wanted to be that mum who used the sling all the time that was my plan but…. I physically wasn’t able to. Just want to put it out there that if you’re reading this and you’re unable to do something that you hoped you’d do with your baby it’s OK!!!!
That must have been hard! And yes, parenthood often doesn't go as planned - but it's OK
I have the same relationship with white noise... I found out it’s working to settle a fussy baby if used at very high volume. I got an app that fades the sound instead of sudden stop
I guess cause it drowns out other noises if they are making baby overstimulated? That would be my assumption at least
@@charliev4156maybe, but it’s usually pretty silent in our room. I read something about the uterus environment being very noisy
In terms of reusable nappies sometimes leaks are due to not enough absorbency sometimes a combo of hemp/bamboo or bamboo/microfibre or hemp/microfibre so two inserts in each nappy.
I think a good compromise to reusable baby wipes are biodegradable wipes disposed of in those green biodegradable food waste bags! They can be thrown into your garden waste bin :)
I tried napp liners when we started weaning but I found they constantly caused leaks. But without the liners I find my reusable nappies very rarely leak, but I know everyone has different experiences as all babies are different sizes
Hannah, you needn't have any routine but you need to get stuff done. So, you have to watch Rowan and use his own rhythm to put him down for predictable, (more or less) naps. But you can let him fuss sometimes. Not cry his heart out, ofcourse. Just don't dash at the first squeek, or at least wait to see if he decides to fuss and whine then give up and drop back to sleep. That's called self soothing. I saw you had introduced frozen veggies when you were showing your freezer chest. Feed him something to fill him up after a short breast feed. Something like cereal. Just something that takes a bit longer to digest but not instead of a breast feed. Rather in addition to a good bresst feed. End up at the bresst until you are sure he's full. He'll be really tired on a feed and a nurse and you should get longer interval before waking. That's the theory, anyhow. Didn't work for my fifth child, the preemie. She just upchucked the whole feed. But it worked on four others.
I'm sorry but there are just some kids who are cranky and others that aren't. But give self soothing a try. I don't want to alarm you and say let Rowan turn red in the face and scream. But if he's just whining a bit on and off, he's not serious. He's just not yet learned to wake, flail a bit and fall back to sleep. Another thing that helps some babies sleep, especially if they have only been sleeping for an hour or so and then he wakes up, is NOT to feed again. He's not hungry and might only need some back patting
Here's another story. My sister's girl was fussy and wouldn't sleep. So, I told her to let me have her and I'd put her to bed. Now, my sister is a psychologist. This was her first child. She read every book in the world on mothering, breast feeding, baby development, etc. She was an authority but she was exhausted.
I went into the bedroom where the crib was and there also was a bed in there. I took her and draped her over my knee on her tummy with her legs dangling, her body on my knee and her cheek resting in my palm. She was only a couple of months old. I held her and rocked her with my hand and knees while patting her rhythmically on the back softly. Soon she stopped yelling, began snuffling, then fell asleep. Slowly and easily I slipped her into the crib. Silence. Two and a half blessed hours of silence when previously she had refused to settle. She was getting silenced with an already empty breast. She was full and clean. She was tired. She just needed some rocking, darkness a hand on her cheek and she was down and out. Also, walking and saying shhhhhhhh, shhhhhhhh directly into a baby's ear can soothe a cranky baby too. But if that doesn't work in fifteen minutes it might It might be gas or irritability. Babies need to learn to settle and it takes a while for some. But feeding isn't always the answer. Rowan isn't underfed. He's a big boy. He has just not learned to fall back asleep or to settle easily. I pity you. It's nerve-wracking and exhausting. Also, let your husband try to sooth him back to sleep. You are the milk bar. He gets rewarded with his favorite thing in the world for waking up. Your husband should try to get Rowan to wait four hours between feedings. Well, three anyhow. It's tough. I'm sorry for your fatigue. Every kid is different. Good luck. This is motherhood. It's not easy all the time.
I did find this interesting! I'm not a parent, but I remember my best friend used cloth diapers when her son was a baby, and she'd put a plastic underwear around them to prevent leaks. You said your reuseables leak sometimes; maybe try putting a plastic underwear around them as well? Then you could use the reuseables around the house with more confidence, and you wouldn't have to feel bad about the times you need to take baby out of the house and use disposables during those times. Just a thought. :)
About baby carrier - there are carriers for newborns, you do not have to wait till 4 monts. But carry baby face out is really bad. It is not ergonomical, it is really bad for developing hips and genitals are under big preasure - try to sit on rope - you would not like it. Healtly is back to shape of C and legs to letter M (knees higher than butt).
Another reason is overstimulation, baby cannot hide to your chest. Solution is put carrier to your back or ring sling and have baby on the side.
I recommend Kinder Cloth Diapers! It’s a momma owned business based out of Pennsylvania. I was getting leaks at night with my little one and when I got some Kinder diapers the leaks went away! Highly recommend!
American viewer here--had to look up if a king bed in the UK is different because here they're huge. Looks like the UK king is close to the American queen bed which makes a lot more sense to me than Rowan taking over an American king-sized bed 😂
Robust Rowan
You could have a bad detergent for that nappies-soap, liquid detergents and bleaching agent can make this problem. Just wash them few times on at least 60*C and use powder non soap non bleaching detergent....
I think that's the advantage of #2, I have a 2yo and a 7mo. With my #2 we had to put the next2me away recently and she's now in bed with us. We have a double and single pushed together :) works great!
It took about 6m to master sidelying with #1 so it was great this time round just to get it from day 1! My boobs are big enough to feed from both without switching too.
Honestly I've never found either of my babies sleep a problem, because we've always been sleeping next to each other and I've never needed to get up in the night. #1 wakes up crying once a night with teething and #2 2-3 times for boob but its all very manageable :)
I've heard bed sharing is quite scary and not the safest for children. What helped u make a decision to bed share vs only cosharing a room?
My little one would slam their legs too! We would call them a whale. Swaddling really worked for us but couldn't really do it as it was during the heatwave and they were just in a nappie most nights. x
I don't have kids but most of, maybe all, of my friends with kids ended up bed sharing at one point or another. I think it's just natural.
Hey! If rowan is wearing nappies for let’s say 2/3 years, and you use one reusable a day instead of a disposable one, that means you’ve put 700-1000 less nappies in landfill. It makes a big difference even if you don’t see it!!
On the reusables, the leaks are probably caused by nappy absorbency, I find bambino mios all in ones and not very absorbant as they're just a microfiber insert, you could boost with bamboo or hemp inside. You'll know if it's that because when you take the nappy off the insert will be saturated, especially at the front for boys, my little boy rarely absorbs all the way to the back of the nappy. When I boost I fold the booster at the front infront of his willy. Hope this helps!
I fought against bed sharing for the first 6 months and then I was returning to work and her sleep was regressing and I wasn't going to be able to do it so she came into the bed and she slept through ever since. She's the same age as Melanie's baby and she'll move out of our bed when she's ready 🤷🏼♀️ I'm not sure I'd have been as confident to start younger than we did.
We have a double and still both share with a 2 year old 😂 she's only 22lbs though soooo
I don't think I could bed share with my future child. I toss and turn a lot at night, I would be uncomfortable I think.
Totally understandable! Follow your gut and do what feels right for you and your family. :)
Interestingly, I was like this as well, but found that after baby was born, I slept very lightly, was finely attuned to their sleep pattern and movement and would stay in the same position. So I felt more comfortable adapting bed sharing practices to our situation (out of necessity, to help us deal with extreme exhaustion).
Sometimes with cloth diapers you need additional "booster" inserts when the baby is older because they pee more at once😅
And having a good baby carrier that you can wear on your back is just amazing! I would recommend going to a babywearing counselor 🤗
Lots of love from Germany 🥰
You done so well and thanks for the advice you are brilliant mom wife and inspiring unbelievable and so sweet smart xoxo 😚 ❤️🎄💚❤️❤️🎄🎅🏻🎅🏻💚❤️❤️❤️💚🎄🎅🏻🎅🏻🎄💚❤️❤️💚🎅🏻🎅🏻🎅🏻💚💚❤️💚🎄🎅🏻🎅🏻🎄💚❤️❤️🎅🏻🎅🏻🎅🏻🎄💚❤️💚🎅🏻🎅🏻🎅🏻🎄❤️❤️💚🎄🎅🏻🎅🏻🎄❤️❤️💚
Please don't wear baby outwards! It's bad for their spine. The only carrier that's good for baby is when their legs are supported from knee to knee and they are facing you (front or back). Please read more info about this it's so important.
baby pottying is horrible for babies, it is very disfunctional, and it's only for convenience
Why do you say that?
@@eliontheinternet3298 in my country the pediatrician society gave a estatement saying that when you do this the children develop constipation when they grow up.
I hadn't heard of this. Could you provide a link?
It seems that many people and cultures have positive experience with elimination communication.
Sometimes, the term potty training is used to mean different things (forceful/ punitive approach versus a gentle, no pressure approach based on intuitive observation). Maybe that explains the diverging information?
Am I the only one that has problems with Hannas picture quality. I can watch lots of you tubes, and the pic quality is great..... Hannah always looks very low quality. No idea why>>>
I am not trying to be judgemental with this, but it's impossible to disagree with someone over something they do with their child without seeming judgemental. If I didn't say something however, I'd feel bad. Not just cause I'd worry for Rowan, but for other parents who'd follow your advice and could end up losing their child. Bed sharing isn't "controversial", it is dangerous, all leading paediatric organisations greatly warn against bed sharing and promote safe sleep (alone, on their back, in a crib). Non-supine sleep positions are also a risk factor for SIDS, and most SIDS cases have multiple risk factors.
From a paper from the AAP: ": Unintentional suffocation is the leading cause of injury death among infants under 1 year old in the United States, with 82% being attributable to accidental suffocation and strangulation in bed." Source: Sleep-Related Infant Suffocation Deaths Attributable to Soft Bedding, Overlay, and Wedging.
The Oct 2018 Safe Sleep for Infants Presentation from the CDC shows how introducing safe sleep initiatives drastically reduced cases of SIDS.
AAP Technical Report on SIDS shows that bedsharing alone increases the risk of SIDS by 400%.
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There's an amazing group on FB called Safe Sleep and Baby Care -- Evidence Based Support. If you currently bed share, if you're thinking about it etc. Please go there. They'll be happy to help you figure out a safe sleeping arrangement for your baby and give you lots of support.
If you look into the causes of suffocation through bed sharing, it’s predominantly due to unsafe practice I.e not following the safe sleep 7. Alcohol, duvets, premature babies etc. bedsharing can be safe when done safely. Many breastfeeding mums will ‘accidentally’ do it due to sleep deprivation, so it’s best they are supported to do it safely
@@ajenkinson3443 The safe sleep 7 is not supported by any research and babies have died while practicing the SS7. No mainstream pediatric org supports the SS7. There is no safe way to bedshare in the same way there's no safe way to travel with a baby in a car without a car seat. If you'd like to speak to parents who've lost their babies while following the SS7, there's many in the group I mentioned.
Thank you for sharing. Unfortunately, for many parents, these recommendations are not realistic with the chaos and survival mode of caring for a newborn baby.
Despite my scientific background and intention to follow the recommendations, I found myself having to do things differently as I was falling asleep in very unsafe situations while holding my baby due to extreme exhaustion. Letting go of that added stress and following my intuition was very helpful.
Wishing everyone the best on their parenting journey!
Bed sharing done according to the safe sleep seven and relevant advice is not dangerous, and it's fearmongering to call it that. The majority of parents will bedshare. It is significantly better that they do it intentionally and with knowledge of how to mitigate risk (as with anything - there is risk to every activity) rather than avoiding it out of fear and doing it unintentionally or uninformed out of desperation.
Babies are designed to be close to their caregivers.
Advising against co-sleeping/bed-sharing is largely Western advice - there are many cultures across the world who actively encourage bed sharing as the safest and most natural way for infants to sleep and to promote their wellbeing and secure attachment. Asia has amongst the lowest instances of SIDS in the world - and bed-sharing is so common in Japan that the Japanese character for the word looks like a child sleeping between two adults. However, Japan also has significantly higher rates of breastfeeding, and lower levels of maternal smoking and alcohol consumption - all risk factors for SIDS. They also often sleep on futons on the floor (which are significantly harder than soft western mattresses). It is much more likely to be dangerous when a mother falls asleep upright on a chair or sofa while holding/feeding their baby - deliberate co sleeping is safer than that. .
Lots of advice around pregnancy and babies is purely cultural - I visited Japan when I was pregnant and was given sushi and Spanish mackerel by our host (both foods UK health advice advises against while pregnant due to listeria/mercury content) - she knew I was pregnant and said they were normal for pregnant women in Japan to eat and was horrified she'd offended me when I said it wasn't advised in the UK. However she refused to serve me green tea because in Japan caffeine while pregnant is completely discouraged - while here you're allowed up to 200mg.
Hey my baby is 4.5 months old and same parenting style woo! I must recommend with bedsharing 1) sidecar a cot - get a cot, lower it to the level they can't climb out, raise the whole thing with furniture raisers and ratchet strap that bad boy to your king bed. We got a low divan base rather than our higher one too just for even more peace of mind. Custom sized cot foam from efoam might be required. I found the UK cosleeping Facebook group really helpful. I think from the posts I've seen in there they might say having the next2me up against the bed might be an entrapment risk. And 2) adult slumbersac. Omg. they're £65 but worth it. They unzip at the front for breastfeeding and then no blanket or duvet near baby needed
I think the crunchy parent people like us still often haven't discovered veganism just yet too. I know how it sounds unrelated to parenting but we preach no violence to our children and then pay for violence against animals just for the sake of taste and firing in with society. Cows have a strong maternal bond with their young, it's not fair for us to make them pregnant and go through birth just too remove their calves after a few days so we can take the milk. You're bucking society and what you've been told by advertising with all this stuff, maybe get curious and knowledgeable about why vegans avoid each animal product
Love your content! Absolutely fully agree and I could have spoken your script, I'm doing the exact same things!