I don't even know who or what my "true self" is anymore. After 17 years (8 married) with a covert narcissist.... I don't even remember what used to complete me. I can't recall a time where any positive thought about myself was either validated through her or condemned as "arrogant" or being "self absorbed". Even small things like an accomplishment in my career would be filtered through her and my perception would only be "real" if it was in line with her understanding of the situation. This video was like watching a fantasy. A momentary distraction that I feel guilty for entertaining... Self love. Self care. Being enough by just being me... How simple to say these things. What difficulty it is hearing them when "just being me" has been extinguished and replaced with profound shame for not "just doing what's expected of me". Thank you, your content is appreciated more than you understand. If anything, it keeps the embers of hope smoldering with the dreams of something better.
Thank you for your response and sharing your thoughts and feelings. I'm sorry about your long painful experience of having to disconnect from being yourself. You are right it's simple to say these things. It's a thought I have as well to myself, as all these 'wisdom' in books can sometimes be annoying in it's simplicity :) This can give to a lot of thoughts and emotions at certain times. It feels true though to me. It's simple, but not easy! The most simple things such as taking good care of ourselves can be very hard to practice. It's okay to not know now or remember all these things, you have been in this situation for a long time, and you might not find it in the past. It might be rediscovered in the now, in the small things that exactly do give you hope or even (guilty) entertainment! What brings you calm, kindness, or a bit of joy? Can you recognize such things? Know, you are strong as you are still here, breathing, and looking for ways in a more positive direction! Wish you kindness!
I don't even know who or what my "true self" is anymore. After 17 years (8 married) with a covert narcissist.... I don't even remember what used to complete me. I can't recall a time where any positive thought about myself was either validated through her or condemned as "arrogant" or being "self absorbed". Even small things like an accomplishment in my career would be filtered through her and my perception would only be "real" if it was in line with her understanding of the situation. This video was like watching a fantasy. A momentary distraction that I feel guilty for entertaining... Self love. Self care. Being enough by just being me... How simple to say these things. What difficulty it is hearing them when "just being me" has been extinguished and replaced with profound shame for not "just doing what's expected of me". Thank you, your content is appreciated more than you understand. If anything, it keeps the embers of hope smoldering with the dreams of something better.
Thank you for your response and sharing your thoughts and feelings. I'm sorry about your long painful experience of having to disconnect from being yourself. You are right it's simple to say these things. It's a thought I have as well to myself, as all these 'wisdom' in books can sometimes be annoying in it's simplicity :) This can give to a lot of thoughts and emotions at certain times. It feels true though to me. It's simple, but not easy! The most simple things such as taking good care of ourselves can be very hard to practice.
It's okay to not know now or remember all these things, you have been in this situation for a long time, and you might not find it in the past. It might be rediscovered in the now, in the small things that exactly do give you hope or even (guilty) entertainment! What brings you calm, kindness, or a bit of joy? Can you recognize such things?
Know, you are strong as you are still here, breathing, and looking for ways in a more positive direction! Wish you kindness!
Thank you for this video ❤ will there be a next one?
Thank you! 🙏 There will be indeed :)
💐