Friends don't put debt on Friends. The don't guilt trip friends into spending money. Either they're your friends that will understand or they're not your friends. Carry on.
All my friends knows I have no money.. I make sure they know so they won't be asking me to go on extravagant vacations and expect me to tag along. Real friends don't put friends in financial mess.
23 for me now Ive also been watching videos of people my age already millionaires. Now Im not saying that Im about to become a millionaire all of a sudden, In fact Im NO WHERE near It, but they most definitely puts a little voice inside my head that says "You Need To Step Your Game Up Sir"
You're all so lucky! I'm 39, divorced a year ago and trying to knock down debt. Heed my warning! Don't put wedding purchases on credit cards (about $5K)! The debt I have from that lasted longer than the marriage. Wish I found him years ago.
What's sad, is that so many people that go into debt with these expensive weddings are still paying for the wedding long after they are divorced. The debt lasts longer than the marriage.
Vickie Clark So crazy you say that! Went to A destination wedding earlier this year. Wife was cheating on the husband. And now there heading for divorce and he's still paying for the wedding
I just did the same thing. A friend is getting married after Thanksgiving and then going to Hawaii the following week with friends and family. I was invited but I knew I'd be pushing it if I went. This confirmed what I knew all along. It's great to have people like Dave around to knock some sense into you.
This...Our wedding cost us $1500, and we are still happily married 19 years later...It was not extravagant, but our friends and family were there, and we paid for it ourselves with the money we had on hand...
I prefer Outlander camping. because seriously with a fuel efficient van. You can pretty much bump around the whole Northwest the whole summer on the cheap. I'm all for saving money. but there comes a point at which if you don't have something of a life. Then the things that you own on you.
I'm no longer friends with any of the girls who were bridesmaids in my wedding. Same with 99% of the weddings I have been in or been invited to. That was only 6 years ago.
I needed to hear this. Very very good friend (I'd even say my best friend) wants me to travel for their birthday. I love them and would LOVE to go, but I'm in debt and in my heart I know that I'd be borrowing money (more debt) to do it. I'm thinking I can just send a gift this year, and our friendship will survive.... and next year, when I'm predicted to be debt free, I can travel to all the birthdays I want to, guilt free!
Dave's right... no destination weddings attended but was a bridesmaid years ago in two friends weddings and haven't kept in touch with them. People drift apart. Why spend money you don't have for an event that's not yours especially when in debt.
This happened to both of my daughters too- in friends’ weddings in college, and I think literally never saw them again. I don’t even think they keep in touch. I hope this extreme wedding culture goes away.
Being single definitely have its perks. Being with someone can be life altering. I'll wait to find that special someone God willing. But I will definitely marry at court and celebrate at home with a handful of People
I am on board with the exception of vacations. I make other sacrafices so I can have the money to vacation. I don't need things but experiences and quality time with my family are more important than money to me personally.
I’ve been working non-stop for over a year. Not a single vacation. Just to help my parents’ stupid financial issues. Little do they know that I’ve come across The Dave Ramsey Show and still save more than they do
Airing dirty laundry in this way does not make you cool. You threw your parents under the bus here and it isn't clear why. Yea they made mistakes but have some compassion and class about it.
I remember one time my "friend" invited me to puerto penasco and when I told her I didn't have money , she responded: I don't either but I'm still going. Well, obviously u do have money because u are going. I hate it when u tell people u don't have money and they say it's only however many hundrends. Don't they know what no money means?
So true. I haven't been in touch with high school friends, college friends. People move on in life. Send a wedding gift and move on. Save money pay off debt build funds.
Sometimes people are having a destination wedding in the hope that only their nearest and dearest are there...they might not actually want you to attend 🤣
And MANY of those expensive weddings end up in equally expensive divorces. I had a wedding 31 years ago at about $1,000 including the dress and it was a cheap wedding even then. Every expensive wedding I went to around that time the couple is no longer together.
This is the biggest struggle Dave... you can't skip every experience in life, you can certainly skip some, but physically I doubt I'm going to learn surfing or go skydiving when I'm 60, some stuff you have to budget for when you're young.
Exactly..make life memorable,I have a well off father who worked very hard for his money,spent little to no time with his family.its been a decade since mom died.we never had a family trip..ever.not a camp out,not a fishing trip,absolutely nothing...now he's got alot of money,but no memories..
scorpiomaj27 it only takes most people 2-3 years to get out of debt and save an emergency fund at which point you can go on vacation he didn’t say you have to wait until you’re 60
@@michaelrondon6267 Just so you know, plenty of "old" people travel. I am 70 and I travel all over the world, on my own or with friends but never with tours. I know plenty of "old" 30 year-olds and vey young 70 year-olds. And paying off debt is at most 3 years of sacrifice, after which you can start travelling, still while saving money and securing your future.
If I'm holding a destination wedding, I'm paying for all my guests flight tickets/hotel rooms/transportation and 3 meals per day. That's how you treat your guests.
Lots of people do that. You would be surprised how much money people actually make. The same people you heard that are living check to check and bitching about their income and expenses can come up with money reallllll fast when it's something they really want. The same people who say they can't afford to go out and everything.
My cousin did a Las Vegas wedding and the whole family lives in TN. A lot of us couldn't go, but they setup a livestream of the whole thing so we could still be a part. Me and my husband eloped and put our wedding money towards a house. We literally got married in our ordained friends living room. It's really great to start out making wise choices.
c Alexis If its my wedding I should be able to have it where I like. Some people have family out of state or a certain place has sentimental value. Has nothing to do with social media. Plus with a destination wedding you can always stay a few days after and call that your honeymoon.
Selfish? You're stupid, couples can decide where and what they want their wedding to look like. I went to a destination wedding it's a great and fun experience. You get to travel + attend a wedding + free food + good memories with close friends.
TashA Glass It is selfish because the people who want go attend the ceremony and witness the marriage of their friends can't go. The bridge and groom will only be married once.
I didn’t attend my eldest sister’s wedding, and that wasn’t even destination! I couldn’t afford the plane ticket back home. She was upset for about a minute. If you can afford to go, great. If not, don’t.
The crazy part is hes right about weddings. 80% of the weddings i go to i barely talk to them anymore or its from family i hate. Its awful we spend so much time for weddings
Someone I used to be friends with had a destination wedding in Hawaii. They didn’t invite anyone. Just their “best friend” couple went with them. She was excited about how economical it was. Dress, small cake, flowers, photographer.
Good advice Dave. Most broke people don’t want to hear it....but the truth hurts. And speaking of weddings, diamonds aren’t forever, it’s the payments that are.
See I think I knew we were broke for the last 10 years. My husband & I have never spent a night in a hotel. We have been to Atlanta & Myrtyle Beach, taken day trips to the beach, we drive and have never flown. We just stay with family. Once we have paid off our $59,300 mortgage 🏡 and our $6,750 credit card debt, then we will have a vacation with our 3 kids.
I went to Hawaii when I was 25. I knew I would likely never have the chance to go again. I think there is a balance to everything. Travel when you're young, live within your means. If you wait to travel until you're old and always saving then that is not a fulfilling life in your youth.
Fully agree! You speak the truth Dave, even with family! My faternal twin sister is having a destination wedding in Florida. We no longer have that special twin bond we grew with up smh! The wedding is next year fortunately. But a plane ticket has already been purchased for a bridal shower next month. the ticket cost me $160. Money that should have been sent to my student loans. But I'll be traveling from Mass so its cheaper than traveling to an island destination....I'm happy to say Ill pay off my student loans by the end of the year as long as nothing interrupts my current plan! I SHOULD be debt free and able to afford her taking part in her wedding next year! GOD WILLING!
Dave's definitely right. I went to a destination wedding of a cousin when I was technically broke a few years back. I regret it to this day! I must have spent 800 to 1000 bucks that I did not have. Flight, hotel, food, car rental. Feels worse that we lost touch. Cancelling my easter trip as I type!
One of my wife's friends had a very expensive nice wedding. It was easily 30K and that was after they had over 100k in student loan debt. That was 7 years ago and they are still paying for that wedding every month while renting a cheap room from her brother! Don't go into debt for a wedding for yourself or a friend.
We got married in our home church in our own town where most of our friends and relatives live. We didn't have nearly all the things "required" for a wedding these days and we've been happily married 27 years! These destination weddings put a burden on relatives and friends.
I came across your channel when I was watching videos about buying a condo vs house. Then I watched more of your videos like this one about personal finance. I resonate with what you're saying. I'm always finding new sources of income especially now that I'm trying to pay off my credit debt acquired when I was poor and needed to buy necessities. And I'm using Ebay to sell my excess stuff I don't use or need and made $500+ in gross sales so far.
Steph Mostly electronic related items and stuff people will use. Also some of it was broken but I was very apparent about it. Honesty will get you far as an eBay seller and in life. The items that made me the most money were my fisheye lens, chrome backpack that's not in stock any more and my slightly broken netbook from 2011.
@@0annonymous this is a fun source of extra cash. Sometimes I go to estate sales and every now and then they don't know what they have. I usually buy high end tools that retail for hundreds of dollars but they are selling the entire tool box for $40. I will keep the tools I want and sell the other tools for $200 and use the profit for seed money at the next estate sale. One time I bought a presentation grade rifle that retails for $2,000. they sold it to me for $450. I turned around and sold it FAST for $1,500. I made $1,100 for less than two hours of my time. You would be amazing what you find at estate sales because the kids of the people who die don't seem to know or care about the value of their late parents items. Every time I usually buy a bunch of stuff that I like and sell off some of it to break even or make a profit.
@@0annonymous Another time I bought an entire coin collection for about $300. There were many good coins. I kept the few coins I really wanted, sold the rest for a little over $300. Now the coins I kept are easily worth $300 and I got them for free. All just for about an hours worth of your time.
my ex wife would do good to listen to you. I took her to 2 different financial councilors when we were trying to build an annual budget and in each one she left because she was told that taking out loans every year to go on her vacations was destructive behavior.
They'll tell you: you only live once. Fair enough. But you have no idea how many years it will take you to pay it off. Don't do it. Learned that one the hard way.
I love that people live a YOLO life. I love that most people don’t research how to better themselves. Their losses will make more opportunities for the taking for those of us with a more distant vision. It doesn’t hurt me that there’s less competition for what’s important in life.
I've gone on several overseas vacations, only to come home broke. I had the time of my life and do not regret it, but admit it was a foolish way to spend approx $25,000. Older and wiser now. Still planning vacations, but making sure that I have savings and investments in place FIRST.
I had to tell a friend that I couldn’t go to her destination bachelorette party because I can’t afford it. I’m bummed but I know that it’s the right decision for me in the long run. I told my friend and she completely understood. I hope others can take Dave’s advice and say no when they need too
Liv L And cripple their finances in the process. The wedding is supposed to be your chance to waste all of YOUR money, not your friends and family's money
Wedding debt is the most foolish debt to go into....it's not worth it. I've been to simple weddings that are still standing....you know the other half!
Yes, someone collected a bunch of data and made a graphic base of the expense. The results were really conclusive - the more 2 people spend on a wedding the higher is the risk of divorce. The numbers do not lie.
people should not go into debt to go on vacations there is a difference. we went on some small vacations growing up as a kid and it was solely my parents tax return money we would do it on. we did not go every year because there is bills to pay and rainy days to save up for. however everyone needs the occasional vacation even if it is a small one like a week long camping trip, fishing trip etc. however a lot of people who are broke want to do that cruise every year or go visit some random country costing thousands. be smart people.
Saves me money every time lol. Except for the stamp to return the invitation saying “sorry I won’t be able to make it, enjoy your time in Costa Rica then spending years paying this off”
I went to a destination wedding. The bride and groom were from different countries, so they had a neutral 3rd place closer to both countries destination wedding. It actually made sense for them. That's the only one where it made sense.
We were 19 and broke when we got married. Had a cheap wedding and reception an elk club and then because we could only take few days off of work we rented a cabin at a campground for our honeymoon.
A 'proper' destination wedding is when the bride and groom foot the entire bill for all their invited guests - flight, room, and boarding. A rather limited number of people can afford to do this. I live in the Tropics and see this all the time on the beach, and they are all very high net worth couples with rather intimate ceremonies of usually less than a dozen guests...
@@elmoomle4565 even still inconsiderate, money isn't an issue for me its getting time away from work or in some peoples case from taking care of their kids
I goofed off a lot in my early 20's and took vacations when I was broke, Not a good idea!!!!! A vacation is a short period of time that is here today and gone tomorrow. You are broke before a vacation and you will be broke after you take a vacation. Would you rather use money to get closer to being debt free? Or would you rather take a weeks vacation and drift further away from your goal?
I recall a bank employee that worked at my bank when I was in my 20's. The bank used to lend out vacation loans. She took one every year. She'd joke upon returning Now I must pay it off by next year so I can take out my next vacation loan. Not ideal planning but at least she was committed to repaying what she borrowed. The bank also had a vacation club .... hope she eventually started to use it.
The Conservative Pelican I'm currently in debt (student loans from medical school). I travel. I go to my aunts lake house, my parents condo in FL, friends houses in other states. I spend a minimal amount of money and get a huge joy out of it. A doctor was just shot dead in my city by a angry patient. You don't know what tomorrow brings or if there will be a tomorrow. Having a little enjoyment is not a horrible thing. The issue Dave has is he assumes people are stupid so it's an all or none thing for him. His advice isn't the best advice it's for the idiot who has no self control.
That was Gangster. Said it w/ a straight face. However, showed intelligence by pausing and forewarned the listener "you're not going to like my answer"
I'm 28, and the weddings are coming left and right, and I have few friends maybe between 5 to 10 whose weddings I know I am going to next few years. Last year for my one friend's destination in another state. $350 plane tickets, $200 on dress, and another $100 on hotel. They get expensive. People who are extremely sociable and have lots and lots of friends, I don't know how you do it! lol. We are at that age...
I'm not broke but when I go on vacation, I go camping or visit relatives and stay with them for a few days. It usually costs me 2 or 3 hundred dollars and I find it a good cheap way to get away from the stress of work without destroying my budget.
this was my exact dilemma last week! we live in CA. my cousins wedding was in AZ. our truck broke down the weekend before and we are on baby step 2. I was so ready to borrow money from my parents. my husband kept telling me we shouldn't borrow and I knew that was correct. the day before the wedding I made decision not to go. I was upset the whole weekend. now I can rationalize, no wedding travel equals no extra debts
My mom never lived to retirement age she lived for today enjoyed her meagre pension she would buy cake today and not have bread tomorrow it worked for her she died at the age of 52
JAY DEE this is a horrible way to live your life. What if she didn't die? She would likely be too old to work and then have to rely on YOU her kid. Oh and the older you get the more expensive it is because your medical bills get super expensive. So your mom was selfish and you (unfortunately) got lucky that she died so young because if she lived she would have burdened you financially and probably made you look at her differently.
My family wanted to go to new York this weekend but honestly no one fan afford it other than my older sister who is here visiting. They almost pressured me into saying yes but financially I accepted that I have too much to set straight to reward myself with a vacation right now. This video reinforced my decision
We decided between a 35k wedding and buying a home. We decided on a 5k wedding and 30k down payment (we saved another 30 before buying) and now our mortgage is nearly paid off
I got invited to a destination wedding. I told them I can't make it right away. I live in New York. It is on a cruise ship in Florida. I don't have that kind of money. Not me. I decided when I get married, people can come... But I'm not going to put a financial burden on people.
Leon McDaniels just elope or go to the JP or your pastor or whatever and save all that money for a down payment on a house or something useful! Engraved napkins and expensive champagne for 200 people? Stupid.
Sometimes u need that break from the struggles and refresh urself to come back stronger , it would help you if its a well calculated get away plan! But again generally if broke focus should be on clearing the debts !
My entire wedding, including my wedding dress, was $1,000. We had 18 people present at the wedding. It was a SMALL and inexpensive wedding. We didn’t want to start our married life by going into debt. We have been married 18 years now. We have no regrets. I never dreamed of a big fancy wedding. I would have been content to marry my husband at a court house in jeans!!! I love him with all my heart and only cared about committing to him for the rest of my life.
I really like the fact that he calls them baby steps 👣... It really just means that everything you do just looks like crumbs falling off but really it's what what will make you win the small changes we make
I think there should be a new trend of coming up with a fun, creative cheap wedding and reception. I think most guests would be just as happy with a potluck reception in a park.
The best wedding I have ever gone to was a friend's wedding at a church that involved a small group of different friends haphazardly thrown together and recorded music that came with a loud click whenever the sound person needed to stop the tape.
Dave is so right on this one. I look back at the 7-8 weddings I went to and participated in in my last few years of college and right after and just see all the money I wasted on air fare, hotel rooms, rental cars, tux rentals, etc. Weddings for the most part unless they are your super super close best friends are a giant waste of money. I'd say 50% of those people were divorced within 2 years and there are only 2 couples that I am still close with to this day. Just not worth it and you'll regret it later.
My husband and I got married last year,had a beautiful brunch wedding .We paid $400 for a venue on a Sunday morning when it was supposed to be $3,000 on a Saturday night. The girls rented their bridal dresses for a very low price , we didn't pressure anyone go on fancy bachelorette/bachelor getaway like all the BS you see on social media. We worked hard,paid for our wedding and in the past year of our marriage we've paid off our credit card and vehicle debt. Next is my student loan! I wish we would have started our Ramsey adventure sooner but we're doing great so far !
My ex and I were so broke, and he insisted that we go to his friend's wedding. I went numb for the hair down the day we left for Pulson, Montana. I didn't want to know how we were paying for that trip. We took my 2002 Kia Rio, it was a stick shift. My ex drove a manual at the time. We had to drive up this STEEP hillside to get to the ceremony site. The last thing I remember, is my car flying down the mountain because my Ex didn't put the Kia into Gear or put the emergency parking Brake on. I watch in Horror as the car went racing down the grassy hillside, it nearly missed a Mini van that was driving up the road we had just come up. 10 years later, my Ex has doesn't talk to that couple. Ahahah the memories of vacations I couldn't afford!
Friends don't put debt on Friends.
The don't guilt trip friends into spending money.
Either they're your friends that will understand or they're not your friends.
Carry on.
David B this needs to be the top comment for this video.
David B +++
Totally Agree!!!
David B Amen!
David B spot on dude
The cost of having a friend has gone up exponentially!
Ever Evey86 that's why I have less friends.
All my friends knows I have no money.. I make sure they know so they won't be asking me to go on extravagant vacations and expect me to tag along. Real friends don't put friends in financial mess.
99% of the people you know, aren't your friends and never were!
On soooo many levels. Everybody wanna borrow $$$. Naw I'm saving for retirement
Thats why i have few friends
I love destination weddings, easier to have an excuse and miss the entire event.
demo2382 😅😅
Lol hahaha
True! 😅😅😅
Lol
Hahaha niceee
I go to huge weddings and most are divorced within a couple years
blondeegirl00 MONEY CAN'T buy LOVE;)
blondeegirl00 sad but true
Good food.
What a waste of money
Probably because they went into debt for it and then argued every day about the debt. I'll never understand it
Act your wage people.
Leocomander ....that’s awesome and adroit! Never heard this saying. Going to have to borrow it. Act your wage people...heheehe, love it!
More like 'act your net worth'. There are plenty of doctors&engineers acting their wage when they can't afford it.
@@LuisDiaz-qg3eg 😑😑😑
@@LuisDiaz-qg3eg true 😂
@@barkingshark6413 THIS IS AN AMAZING SAYING I'M STEALING THIS
I laugh at people who drop $30k on a wedding. I see it all the time. You know what else is nice? Looking at $30k in my bank account.
Chris Boulas Then 50k on a DIVORCE?
Chris Boulas They divorce before the wedding is paid for.
Chris Boulas : I knw exactly wat u talkin about
Instead of wastin that money into a scam Weddin
We bought a house instead
Our wedding was less than 5 grand; our honeymoon to Hawai'i was about the same. It's not hard.
hard enough to save $30k. I can't imagine shelling out $30k for an effin wedding.
I'm so happy I discovered Dave Ramsey at age 20
Im 19 totally agree with you.
Naajiah Stewart I'm 17!
Same here!! Hes an uncle ive never had
23 for me now Ive also been watching videos of people my age already millionaires. Now Im not saying that Im about to become a millionaire all of a sudden, In fact Im NO WHERE near It, but they most definitely puts a little voice inside my head that says "You Need To Step Your Game Up Sir"
You're all so lucky! I'm 39, divorced a year ago and trying to knock down debt. Heed my warning! Don't put wedding purchases on credit cards (about $5K)! The debt I have from that lasted longer than the marriage. Wish I found him years ago.
What's sad, is that so many people that go into debt with these expensive weddings are still paying for the wedding long after they are divorced. The debt lasts longer than the marriage.
Vickie Clark So crazy you say that! Went to A destination wedding earlier this year. Wife was cheating on the husband. And now there heading for divorce and he's still paying for the wedding
Very sad
Wow
The Black Knight is this true!?! Smh
The only ones making money are the caterers and the attorneys.
If you acted like you're broke then you probably wouldn't be broke anymore.
RealLife Money True statement
Good way to look at business too.... no debt other than my pickup truck and that was only $5k. If I back out of my business
Words to live by
A lot of people don’t understand how rich they aren’t.
I figure why fake being broke when I can just say No.
Although if people think you're broke it's great camouflage to deal with less BS.
I cancelled my trip after watching this. Thanks Dave :)
Jazzy Nicholette atta girl jazzy
Jazzy Nicholette Smart girl!
If this is true, great move!
Jazzy Nicholette Super smart move. Money in the bank or less debt is the way to go.
I just did the same thing. A friend is getting married after Thanksgiving and then going to Hawaii the following week with friends and family. I was invited but I knew I'd be pushing it if I went. This confirmed what I knew all along. It's great to have people like Dave around to knock some sense into you.
My wedding cost $2,000, 13yr later still happily married.
Congratulations!!
This...Our wedding cost us $1500, and we are still happily married 19 years later...It was not extravagant, but our friends and family were there, and we paid for it ourselves with the money we had on hand...
Amen! We were broke, so we had a broke people wedding. People made fun of us, but we are 16 years strong!
@@staceyj3667 I just want a good backyard BBQ wedding.
That's what I did. Backyard BBQ. Keg of Bud Light, and ribs. Was great.
The best vacation is to stay at home watching this show knowing all my debts are paid off.
I prefer Outlander camping.
because seriously with a fuel efficient van. You can pretty much bump around the whole Northwest the whole summer on the cheap.
I'm all for saving money.
but there comes a point at which if you don't have something of a life. Then the things that you own on you.
I'm no longer friends with any of the girls who were bridesmaids in my wedding. Same with 99% of the weddings I have been in or been invited to. That was only 6 years ago.
Regardless if they're not friends or grew apart. It doesn't make a difference; you're still not talking to those people so it's pointless.
Same here most ppl go to life their own lives after college and what not and some friendships last others done such is life.
desidoesdeals wow! That must have been a nasty falling out
That’s so sad
That’s really really sad
My childhood friend who is broke took up a loan of 50k for his wedding. Now he's in debt and his marriage is also falling apart
You cant fix stupid...
That's because the wedding was based in vanity to begin with.
poor guy
I bet the debt is a huge blow to the marriage too
Living the dream...
Pinterest will be the direct downfall of expectations in our society
momma2ski bahahahahaha 😂😂😂 "pinterest"
glad you appreciated the humor...
momma2ski exactly what i was thinking!
momma2ski 👏 Perfectly said.
momma2ski Fakebook already takes down OVER 80% of Marriages in SOME Counties in the U.S.
I needed to hear this. Very very good friend (I'd even say my best friend) wants me to travel for their birthday. I love them and would LOVE to go, but I'm in debt and in my heart I know that I'd be borrowing money (more debt) to do it. I'm thinking I can just send a gift this year, and our friendship will survive.... and next year, when I'm predicted to be debt free, I can travel to all the birthdays I want to, guilt free!
Dave's right... no destination weddings attended but was a bridesmaid years ago in two friends weddings and haven't kept in touch with them. People drift apart. Why spend money you don't have for an event that's not yours especially when in debt.
This happened to both of my daughters too- in friends’ weddings in college, and I think literally never saw them again. I don’t even think they keep in touch. I hope this extreme wedding culture goes away.
Being single never felt so good..
Drummergeorge surrre
True, but it’s also great when you’re with someone you’re compatible with in every way, especially financially.
Being single definitely have its perks. Being with someone can be life altering. I'll wait to find that special someone God willing. But I will definitely marry at court and celebrate at home with a handful of
People
Sudo Linux yeah file that under "good luck "
Keep tellin urself that bud
I am on board with the exception of vacations. I make other sacrafices so I can have the money to vacation. I don't need things but experiences and quality time with my family are more important than money to me personally.
*sacrifices
Any smart person chooses when and where to go on their vacation. Not spending money on other people's vacations at their chosen time.
Weddings= Biggest waste of money in modern American society.
plisskin83 Preach
plisskin83 agree... I think we spent 200 including rings and a Court house wedding . I couldn't fathom going in debt for a party and a piece of paper.
truth
Yep. That money would be better spent on a house.
Someone who gets it! Wow nice to meet you lol
I’ve been to four weddings. Never again. Mine will be a backyard wedding in front of our parents. No bridesmaids or groomsman. Max invitees 12.
I’ve been working non-stop for over a year. Not a single vacation. Just to help my parents’ stupid financial issues. Little do they know that I’ve come across The Dave Ramsey Show and still save more than they do
🤣
Airing dirty laundry in this way does not make you cool. You threw your parents under the bus here and it isn't clear why. Yea they made mistakes but have some compassion and class about it.
I remember one time my "friend" invited me to puerto penasco and when I told her I didn't have money , she responded: I don't either but I'm still going. Well, obviously u do have money because u are going. I hate it when u tell people u don't have money and they say it's only however many hundrends. Don't they know what no money means?
We had a family member get married out of state. We could not afford it and did not go. Its called responsibility!
So true. I haven't been in touch with high school friends, college friends. People move on in life. Send a wedding gift and move on. Save money pay off debt build funds.
Sometimes people are having a destination wedding in the hope that only their nearest and dearest are there...they might not actually want you to attend 🤣
That’s a nice idea. If that’s the intention, they shouldn’t send any invitations.
That is true.
The reason why weddings today are like Hollywood productions is because today people just want to show off on Instagram
Sad 😞 but so true 🙄
Well I’ve been seeing over the top weddings for decades, so it’s more than just the gram..
Unfortunately
And MANY of those expensive weddings end up in equally expensive divorces. I had a wedding 31 years ago at about $1,000 including the dress and it was a cheap wedding even then. Every expensive wedding I went to around that time the couple is no longer together.
$1,000 wasn't cheap back then. That is the same as about 5,000 today.
This is the biggest struggle Dave... you can't skip every experience in life, you can certainly skip some, but physically I doubt I'm going to learn surfing or go skydiving when I'm 60, some stuff you have to budget for when you're young.
This is a very good point,you’re probably not going to have the energy to travel the world when you’re 60 so save up and do it in your 20s
Exactly..make life memorable,I have a well off father who worked very hard for his money,spent little to no time with his family.its been a decade since mom died.we never had a family trip..ever.not a camp out,not a fishing trip,absolutely nothing...now he's got alot of money,but no memories..
scorpiomaj27 it only takes most people 2-3 years to get out of debt and save an emergency fund at which point you can go on vacation he didn’t say you have to wait until you’re 60
@@michaelrondon6267 Just so you know, plenty of "old" people travel. I am 70 and I travel all over the world, on my own or with friends but never with tours. I know plenty of "old" 30 year-olds and vey young 70 year-olds. And paying off debt is at most 3 years of sacrifice, after which you can start travelling, still while saving money and securing your future.
I'm thankful for my parents allowing me to get plentiful experiences in my early twenties, whenever I'll die, I'll at least have lived
If I'm holding a destination wedding, I'm paying for all my guests flight tickets/hotel rooms/transportation and 3 meals per day. That's how you treat your guests.
Viet PopLove right.... who are you, bill gates?
Remy Martin: there's a lot of people who can do that. And by the way, they're not bill gates
He did say "IF".
Viet PopLove Bad idea to start a marriage broke because that is what you'll be later
Lots of people do that. You would be surprised how much money people actually make. The same people you heard that are living check to check and bitching about their income and expenses can come up with money reallllll fast when it's something they really want. The same people who say they can't afford to go out and everything.
People have cheaper weddings have better marriages.
I think thats with financial responsibility being a part of a more stable Grounded personality.
That does seem to be true!
True! We were ridiculed for our backyard affair...no one is laughing 16 years later.
This is correlation not causation
No, not always true. So they might be paying for the mistake of marriage BUT atleast they aren't still paying for a wedding long after it's over.
My cousin did a Las Vegas wedding and the whole family lives in TN. A lot of us couldn't go, but they setup a livestream of the whole thing so we could still be a part.
Me and my husband eloped and put our wedding money towards a house. We literally got married in our ordained friends living room. It's really great to start out making wise choices.
Destination weddings are very selfish. How can you expect attendees to travel to your event.
telecasterbear People don't. Destination wedding =low attendance= cheaper wedding for the couple to pay for. Won't have to pay for 100+ ppl.
TashA Glass GENIUS!
c Alexis If its my wedding I should be able to have it where I like. Some people have family out of state or a certain place has sentimental value. Has nothing to do with social media. Plus with a destination wedding you can always stay a few days after and call that your honeymoon.
Selfish? You're stupid, couples can decide where and what they want their wedding to look like. I went to a destination wedding it's a great and fun experience. You get to travel + attend a wedding + free food + good memories with close friends.
TashA Glass It is selfish because the people who want go attend the ceremony and witness the marriage of their friends can't go. The bridge and groom will only be married once.
I didn’t attend my eldest sister’s wedding, and that wasn’t even destination!
I couldn’t afford the plane ticket back home. She was upset for about a minute.
If you can afford to go, great. If not, don’t.
It’s so good she was understanding. I didn’t go to my cousins wedding and I was complete ostracized from my whole extended family.
The crazy part is hes right about weddings. 80% of the weddings i go to i barely talk to them anymore or its from family i hate. Its awful we spend so much time for weddings
What kind of 25 year old has a destination wedding and expects that any of his friends can afford it?
Someone I used to be friends with had a destination wedding in Hawaii. They didn’t invite anyone. Just their “best friend” couple went with them. She was excited about how economical it was. Dress, small cake, flowers, photographer.
Kids who met at private schools lol
To summarise what he just said, live within your means.
Good advice Dave. Most broke people don’t want to hear it....but the truth hurts. And speaking of weddings, diamonds aren’t forever, it’s the payments that are.
See I think I knew we were broke for the last 10 years. My husband & I have never spent a night in a hotel. We have been to Atlanta & Myrtyle Beach, taken day trips to the beach, we drive and have never flown. We just stay with family. Once we have paid off our $59,300 mortgage 🏡 and our $6,750 credit card debt, then we will have a vacation with our 3 kids.
I went to Hawaii when I was 25. I knew I would likely never have the chance to go again. I think there is a balance to everything. Travel when you're young, live within your means. If you wait to travel until you're old and always saving then that is not a fulfilling life in your youth.
Fully agree! You speak the truth Dave, even with family! My faternal twin sister is having a destination wedding in Florida. We no longer have that special twin bond we grew with up smh! The wedding is next year fortunately. But a plane ticket has already been purchased for a bridal shower next month. the ticket cost me $160. Money that should have been sent to my student loans. But I'll be traveling from Mass so its cheaper than traveling to an island destination....I'm happy to say Ill pay off my student loans by the end of the year as long as nothing interrupts my current plan! I SHOULD be debt free and able to afford her taking part in her wedding next year! GOD WILLING!
so are you in good relationship still with your twin sister?
Justin Horman sorry to disappoint when I say I keep distance
John Castillo yes! I'm under 10k now! 😊
Dave's definitely right. I went to a destination wedding of a cousin when I was technically broke a few years back. I regret it to this day! I must have spent 800 to 1000 bucks that I did not have. Flight, hotel, food, car rental. Feels worse that we lost touch. Cancelling my easter trip as I type!
"There is a 80 percent chance that the relationship wont last" say no more lol.
JPence14 I hope you got a prenup. An inexpensive wedding doesn't mean your wife doesn't have ulterior motives...
Exactly.
Just told my friend I can’t go on a girls trip she’s planning! Thanks for the advice!
These same people that say "You only live once" want to put the dept of their living onto others.
Its not worth it to spend alot on a wedding in the first place you have to live afterwards.
Im so happy i found dave ramsey channel earlier. Im 17 and this is gonna be what i need to step up my life in the future
One of my wife's friends had a very expensive nice wedding. It was easily 30K and that was after they had over 100k in student loan debt. That was 7 years ago and they are still paying for that wedding every month while renting a cheap room from her brother! Don't go into debt for a wedding for yourself or a friend.
Idiots lol
Sadly $30k for a wedding is average or below, not top of the line. It’s insane.
We got married in our home church in our own town where most of our friends and relatives live. We didn't have nearly all the things "required" for a wedding these days and we've been happily married 27 years! These destination weddings put a burden on relatives and friends.
Congratulations! Assuming it's 29-30 years now?
@@Musicienne-DAB1995 Yes, 29 years. Thanks!
I came across your channel when I was watching videos about buying a condo vs house. Then I watched more of your videos like this one about personal finance. I resonate with what you're saying. I'm always finding new sources of income especially now that I'm trying to pay off my credit debt acquired when I was poor and needed to buy necessities. And I'm using Ebay to sell my excess stuff I don't use or need and made $500+ in gross sales so far.
OMG Please I'm trying to do this!!! What have you sold?
Steph Mostly electronic related items and stuff people will use. Also some of it was broken but I was very apparent about it. Honesty will get you far as an eBay seller and in life.
The items that made me the most money were my fisheye lens, chrome backpack that's not in stock any more and my slightly broken netbook from 2011.
Awesomeness!!
@@0annonymous this is a fun source of extra cash. Sometimes I go to estate sales and every now and then they don't know what they have. I usually buy high end tools that retail for hundreds of dollars but they are selling the entire tool box for $40. I will keep the tools I want and sell the other tools for $200 and use the profit for seed money at the next estate sale. One time I bought a presentation grade rifle that retails for $2,000. they sold it to me for $450. I turned around and sold it FAST for $1,500. I made $1,100 for less than two hours of my time. You would be amazing what you find at estate sales because the kids of the people who die don't seem to know or care about the value of their late parents items.
Every time I usually buy a bunch of stuff that I like and sell off some of it to break even or make a profit.
@@0annonymous Another time I bought an entire coin collection for about $300. There were many good coins. I kept the few coins I really wanted, sold the rest for a little over $300. Now the coins I kept are easily worth $300 and I got them for free. All just for about an hours worth of your time.
I love his rants!! This is the way we should talk to our children!
my ex wife would do good to listen to you. I took her to 2 different financial councilors when we were trying to build an annual budget and in each one she left because she was told that taking out loans every year to go on her vacations was destructive behavior.
"We used to go see the Preacher, and he was like 'Yeah, done!'" 🤣
If you can't afford it, don't do it. No procession or experience feels as good as having money in the bank.
I tell people I went on a very expensive trip. When they asked me where I went I said, the gas station!
They'll tell you: you only live once. Fair enough. But you have no idea how many years it will take you to pay it off. Don't do it. Learned that one the hard way.
I love that people live a YOLO life. I love that most people don’t research how to better themselves. Their losses will make more opportunities for the taking for those of us with a more distant vision. It doesn’t hurt me that there’s less competition for what’s important in life.
everybody needs a vacation, to help refresh their mindset, perhaps not an expensive vacay, there are ways to do cheap vacations.
I've gone on several overseas vacations, only to come home broke. I had the time of my life and do not regret it, but admit it was a foolish way to spend approx $25,000. Older and wiser now. Still planning vacations, but making sure that I have savings and investments in place FIRST.
I had to tell a friend that I couldn’t go to her destination bachelorette party because I can’t afford it. I’m bummed but I know that it’s the right decision for me in the long run. I told my friend and she completely understood. I hope others can take Dave’s advice and say no when they need too
Video in a nutshell: you are poor don’t go. But hey I am going on a blast of a vacation wedding because I’m not poor. Have a nice life. 😂
If you can't pay for it, don't buy it.
If it’s 4 figures or less and you can’t pay for it a few times over, if you don’t need it you can’t afford it.
Destination weddings are selfish. The couple is demanding everyone else travel so they don't have to travel to the honeymoon after the wedding.
Liv L And cripple their finances in the process. The wedding is supposed to be your chance to waste all of YOUR money, not your friends and family's money
"Lotta things have shifted since I had hair." :)
🤣🤣
Wedding debt is the most foolish debt to go into....it's not worth it. I've been to simple weddings that are still standing....you know the other half!
I'm fairly certain I remember reading a study on the correlation between wedding cost and divorce rate.
Yes, someone collected a bunch of data and made a graphic base of the expense. The results were really conclusive - the more 2 people spend on a wedding the higher is the risk of divorce. The numbers do not lie.
Most ppl want weddings and NOT the marriage to begin with
Live like no one else so later, you can live like no one else.
Priceless.
people should not go into debt to go on vacations there is a difference. we went on some small vacations growing up as a kid and it was solely my parents tax return money we would do it on. we did not go every year because there is bills to pay and rainy days to save up for. however everyone needs the occasional vacation even if it is a small one like a week long camping trip, fishing trip etc. however a lot of people who are broke want to do that cruise every year or go visit some random country costing thousands. be smart people.
Isaac Spencer yeah i would use tax money to pay off a few debts or bills and then use rest for travel.
I laughed so hard when he said “well ur not gonna like my answer” 😂😂😂 WE JUST GOT SCHOOOLED!!!!!
Destination weddings are one of the most inconsiderate things people planning a wedding can do to friends and family.
Saves me money every time lol. Except for the stamp to return the invitation saying “sorry I won’t be able to make it, enjoy your time in Costa Rica then spending years paying this off”
I went to a destination wedding. The bride and groom were from different countries, so they had a neutral 3rd place closer to both countries destination wedding. It actually made sense for them. That's the only one where it made sense.
Yes! To people who can’t afford it.
We were 19 and broke when we got married. Had a cheap wedding and reception an elk club and then because we could only take few days off of work we rented a cabin at a campground for our honeymoon.
I spent literally $200 dollars in my "Beach wedding" where no one of friends were invited. Finally, seven years later I still happely married.
Lesson learnt been there and done that never again, if you can't afford it don't go and put yourselves in trouble.
Destination weddings are so inconsiderate to all of the guests. What makes the couple think everyone can drop 2k on a stupid wedding trip?
A 'proper' destination wedding is when the bride and groom foot the entire bill for all their invited guests - flight, room, and boarding. A rather limited number of people can afford to do this. I live in the Tropics and see this all the time on the beach, and they are all very high net worth couples with rather intimate ceremonies of usually less than a dozen guests...
They don't have to go then.
@@elmoomle4565 even still inconsiderate, money isn't an issue for me its getting time away from work or in some peoples case from taking care of their kids
I have been to these high dollar weddings-and see divorce later-what a waste!!!
I goofed off a lot in my early 20's and took vacations when I was broke, Not a good idea!!!!! A vacation is a short period of time that is here today and gone tomorrow. You are broke before a vacation and you will be broke after you take a vacation. Would you rather use money to get closer to being debt free? Or would you rather take a weeks vacation and drift further away from your goal?
I recall a bank employee that worked at my bank when I was in my 20's. The bank used to lend out vacation loans. She took one every year. She'd joke upon returning Now I must pay it off by next year so I can take out my next vacation loan. Not ideal planning but at least she was committed to repaying what she borrowed. The bank also had a vacation club .... hope she eventually started to use it.
The Conservative Pelican I'm currently in debt (student loans from medical school). I travel. I go to my aunts lake house, my parents condo in FL, friends houses in other states. I spend a minimal amount of money and get a huge joy out of it. A doctor was just shot dead in my city by a angry patient. You don't know what tomorrow brings or if there will be a tomorrow. Having a little enjoyment is not a horrible thing. The issue Dave has is he assumes people are stupid so it's an all or none thing for him. His advice isn't the best advice it's for the idiot who has no self control.
That was Gangster. Said it w/ a straight face. However, showed intelligence by pausing and forewarned the listener "you're not going to like my answer"
"Live like no one else, so you can live like no one else". Such good advice.
Young fella didn't listen and gonna do it anyways. So broke he can't even pay attention.
The bigger the wedding, the higher probability of divorce. Dave is spot on on his advice tho
I'm 28, and the weddings are coming left and right, and I have few friends maybe between 5 to 10 whose weddings I know I am going to next few years. Last year for my one friend's destination in another state. $350 plane tickets, $200 on dress, and another $100 on hotel. They get expensive. People who are extremely sociable and have lots and lots of friends, I don't know how you do it! lol. We are at that age...
I'm not broke but when I go on vacation, I go camping or visit relatives and stay with them for a few days. It usually costs me 2 or 3 hundred dollars and I find it a good cheap way to get away from the stress of work without destroying my budget.
this was my exact dilemma last week! we live in CA. my cousins wedding was in AZ. our truck broke down the weekend before and we are on baby step 2. I was so ready to borrow money from my parents. my husband kept telling me we shouldn't borrow and I knew that was correct. the day before the wedding I made decision not to go. I was upset the whole weekend. now I can rationalize, no wedding travel equals no extra debts
Im enlightened by what you said. It’s just so true that many of these relationships are not going to be permanent.
My mom never lived to retirement age she lived for today enjoyed her meagre pension she would buy cake today and not have bread tomorrow it worked for her she died at the age of 52
JAY DEE the stress of being broke will kill you
JAY DEE this is a horrible way to live your life. What if she didn't die? She would likely be too old to work and then have to rely on YOU her kid. Oh and the older you get the more expensive it is because your medical bills get super expensive. So your mom was selfish and you (unfortunately) got lucky that she died so young because if she lived she would have burdened you financially and probably made you look at her differently.
My family wanted to go to new York this weekend but honestly no one fan afford it other than my older sister who is here visiting. They almost pressured me into saying yes but financially I accepted that I have too much to set straight to reward myself with a vacation right now. This video reinforced my decision
The cost of a wedding is a joke
We decided between a 35k wedding and buying a home. We decided on a 5k wedding and 30k down payment (we saved another 30 before buying) and now our mortgage is nearly paid off
I love Dave.
Jason Burns mee 2 that's my guy
I got invited to a destination wedding. I told them I can't make it right away. I live in New York. It is on a cruise ship in Florida. I don't have that kind of money. Not me.
I decided when I get married, people can come... But I'm not going to put a financial burden on people.
Leon McDaniels just elope or go to the JP or your pastor or whatever and save all that money for a down payment on a house or something useful! Engraved napkins and expensive champagne for 200 people? Stupid.
Sometimes u need that break from the struggles and refresh urself to come back stronger , it would help you if its a well calculated get away plan! But again generally if broke focus should be on clearing the debts !
That was the most brutally honest answer, ive ever heard someone give. Kudos to you
My entire wedding, including my wedding dress, was $1,000. We had 18 people present at the wedding. It was a SMALL and inexpensive wedding. We didn’t want to start our married life by going into debt. We have been married 18 years now. We have no regrets. I never dreamed of a big fancy wedding. I would have been content to marry my husband at a court house in jeans!!! I love him with all my heart and only cared about committing to him for the rest of my life.
I really like the fact that he calls them baby steps 👣... It really just means that everything you do just looks like crumbs falling off but really it's what what will make you win the small changes we make
I think there should be a new trend of coming up with a fun, creative cheap wedding and reception. I think most guests would be just as happy with a potluck reception in a park.
The best wedding I have ever gone to was a friend's wedding at a church that involved a small group of different friends haphazardly thrown together and recorded music that came with a loud click whenever the sound person needed to stop the tape.
My roommate didn’t pay rent to go to a music festival last year.
That’s plain stupid
Dave is so right on this one. I look back at the 7-8 weddings I went to and participated in in my last few years of college and right after and just see all the money I wasted on air fare, hotel rooms, rental cars, tux rentals, etc. Weddings for the most part unless they are your super super close best friends are a giant waste of money. I'd say 50% of those people were divorced within 2 years and there are only 2 couples that I am still close with to this day. Just not worth it and you'll regret it later.
big weddings...big waste
My husband and I got married last year,had a beautiful brunch wedding .We paid $400 for a venue on a Sunday morning when it was supposed to be $3,000 on a Saturday night. The girls rented their bridal dresses for a very low price , we didn't pressure anyone go on fancy bachelorette/bachelor getaway like all the BS you see on social media. We worked hard,paid for our wedding and in the past year of our marriage we've paid off our credit card and vehicle debt. Next is my student loan! I wish we would have started our Ramsey adventure sooner but we're doing great so far !
My ex and I were so broke, and he insisted that we go to his friend's wedding. I went numb for the hair down the day we left for Pulson, Montana. I didn't want to know how we were paying for that trip. We took my 2002 Kia Rio, it was a stick shift. My ex drove a manual at the time.
We had to drive up this STEEP hillside to get to the ceremony site. The last thing I remember, is my car flying down the mountain because my Ex didn't put the Kia into Gear or put the emergency parking Brake on.
I watch in Horror as the car went racing down the grassy hillside, it nearly missed a Mini van that was driving up the road we had just come up.
10 years later, my Ex has doesn't talk to that couple. Ahahah the memories of vacations I couldn't afford!
so did the car make it :)
Well she did say it NEARLY MISSED the minivan so i doubt it made it.
My mother-in-law borrowed the money for her daughter’s wedding. Five years later when they were getting divorced she was still making payments. Nuts!