Anxiety is truly horrible. I’ve struggled with it for the past few years since my Mum died. Spent many a day/night in A&E and was nearly hospitalised with it. My GP was brilliant and I was lucky and managed to see a really good consultant psychiatrist through the NHS. Slowly getting there and chilling on UA-cam, listening to music and podcasts and going for walks helps. X
Devastated to learn of your attacks. relieved to know you have understanding and loving people around you to help cope. As I have remarked before, keep smiling, it's what makes the world go round.
Hi Alanna, for some reason I found myself re-watching this video today, it rang so many bells with me. I’m 52 now and I suffered from anxiety since my school days and it’s not good, I have a limited social life and I avoid unfamiliar situations. Over the years I have just developed the attitude to push through and tell myself it won’t be as bad as you think, for the most part this has worked, but I still have social anxiety but I just grit my teeth and move forwards. Take care.
Great video, I suffer with anxiety and depression and find most people don’t understand. I always know if a panic attack is coming on and get myself to a safe place and do deep breathing. The comment I hate the most is pull yourself together, like that really works! Hope you are still loving living here in the UK.
Given your fairly extreme levels of anxiety its nothing short of a miracle that you actually left the comfort of home! You should really be pleased and proud of yourself to survive independently for 2 years. I suffer no anxieties really and i would struggle to live in a foreign country. Kudos
I was diagnosed with agoraphobia when I was 15. Very difficult thing to live with. People tend to view mental illness as something you should be able to, "Pull yourself out of it". It's not like that, it's akin to anything else you may suffer with. It's amazing to hear you have similar anxiety issues, I hope you are ok from now on. I'm trying hardest I can, plus following every structured meeting and discussion. Agoraphobia is something that makes a regular man feel like less than a man. Can't believe I'm typing this and letting you know. But I am very drunk, so bollocks to it.
Girl, I love this video! Thank you for the candid chat. I suffer from anxiety too and found myself nodding along with so much of this video. I'm a lover of routine too; I go to the gym on certain days, etc. and hate it when that changes and get really panicky! I've had exes in the past make fun of me needing to stick to this routine which definitely didn't help! I'm a weird combination of an extrovert with anxiety so sometimes I struggle going out to see people but then spend every second regretting being at home and beating myself up for not going. Having said that, the odd bit of alone time is super important to me too. Basically, I agree with everything you said in this video and also have similar coping strategies!
Found your UA-cam channel recently found your videos fun to watch, I live in the UK in the Kent area too 🙂 but found this video in particular v helpful thx for sharing and being so honest.
As a sufferer of anxiety I'd like to thank you for talking about this subject so openly. My anxiety has been so bad it often stopped me from venturing outside. I even missed my own Mother's birthday party because of it. But I am receiving medical help now and things are getting much better (cognitive therapy is a great thing). Anxiety is often such a lonely condition and It really helps to hear that other people understand. x
Personally I throw myself into listening to different types of music; which helps a lot. Thanks for doing this video; I know it can be difficult to be so open with anyone. You are not a failure; you have moved to a completely new place and are coping better than I would.
this is great advice for people suffering with anxiety. My personal trick which was the only thing that helped stop a period of near constant panic attacks was to embrace the anxiety and stop resisting it. Whenever i felt it escalating I would just urge it to go ahead and do it´s worst, almost as soon as i stop resisting the panic stops and things return to normal. You can´t hold back the wave of panic when it comes, it´s too powerful and trying to hold it back just makes it worse for longer, let is move through you like water flowing around a rock.
Thanks for making this, Alanna. I feel you a lot on this. Getting stuck inside of your own head is something I've been dealing with my whole life and, for me, I've turned to music and video games. Just having something to focus on, analyse, and drown out that pesky downer voice is huge. My noise cancelling headphones are my most prized possession for this very reason :) Cheers again, bud! - a Kiwi adapting to UK life
It is not silly to cry out loud. From someone who suffers with anxiety also you offer excellent advice which I am trying to follow. Good for you talking about panic attacks trying to get to sleep. Only thought about this recently but you have words which I can appreciate.
Thanks for doing this one, takes a lot of courage to discuss stuff like this, since watching this I have started eating more in the mornings and drinking more water, and just a few small changes have made a big difference, I'm not so stressed out at work and feel more calm, thanks from the USA
Where to start... So much. I struggle with anxiety and depression and it's sometimes hard to differentiate the two because for example depression can manifest as irritability. Sometimes I'm so focused on dealing with one and then the other shows up and I need to get my bearings. I also find exercise helpful and watching what I eat and there's a very fine line between exercising to "punish" yourself or to force yourself and doing it as a self-care thing and as a source for a feeling of accomplishment. I also find it helpful to feel what I'm feeling and accept it rather than freak out and listen to the stressed out thoughts about what I should be doing, which are not very wise thoughts for the most part. Finding a balance between avoiding anxiety triggers and actually doing them and seeing it wasn't so bad is also something I try to do. For example if I'm anxious about leaving the house I try to remind myself how nice it felt last times I did it and how I'm missing out by letting the anxiety win. But I also try not to push myself too much. So if I did a few things that day it's okay not to do all the anxiety provoking things and just cuddle with the cats and watch UA-cam videos. Doing things that feel good and boost confidence help, too, like you said about cleaning and errands but it can be more things. Giving myself credit for things I did despite anxiety and judging how true the anxious thoughts were after the fact help with reducing the credibility of those anxious thoughts.
I love this vid. I was surprised to see it having watched a bunch of your others, but this is my territory - not just personally, but professionally - so it's great to see something mental health related randomly thrown into the mix. It's an awesome indicator of how talking about mental health is becoming more and more accepted. So firstly, thank you. Just thank you. I could literally write forever on this (I'm a writer developing a charity focused on mental health resources, so I actually will be writing about this for as long as I'm able), so I'll just add one thing: There's a lot of really simple and effective stuff here. I won't comment on everything, I'll simply add something to your point about lists, which is great, as a sense of achievement, however small, can really help to quiet a self-attacking mind. One really useful trick with lists to help maximise the esteem boost which can be part of combatting anxiety (as well as depression), is to break down tasks into discrete parts. E.g., rather than having "doing the laundry" as one item, which becomes a stick with which to beat yourself if you don't get it all done from start to finish in one go, it can be broken down into: 1 - sort whites from colours, 2 wash whites, 3 hang whites on radiators/line/dry in machine, 4 wash colours, 5 fold whites (if dry) etc etc. This way if all you manage to achieve in a day is get the whites and colours seperated and get the whites washed but the colours are still in a pile on the bedroom floor, you have got two ticks to boost your esteem rather than a big fat zero because you didn't complete the whole job. It sounds absurdly simplistic but it's very effective. That sense of achievement is crucial when you have a head that likes to torment you. And I will throw one other thing in: the notebook by the bedside is an old but invaluable tool. When your head won't shut up it can really help to jot down what's playing on your mind (no electronic devices though as this will stimulate your brain and further impede the onset of sleep, so good old fashioned pen and paper is best). Bullet points or your own form of short hand is sufficient; chances are you won't even read half of what you write, but it can help short-circuit the circus in your head that's detemined to rob you of sleep; in addition, if certain themes keeping rearing their head, noting them down, especially if they are vague and fragmented, can help them evolve into more coherent thoughts over time - not least because the unconscious can work wonders when we're asleep. This can help both with gradually bringing the root of specific anxieties into conscious focus to be worked on in a structured way (possibly with a therapist if you so choose), and over time the very practice can become part of a ritual that instructs your brain to "switch off now because it's time to sleep". I worked with one person who developed this to the point where they actively sought five things to jot down before putting their head on the pillow, and within a few months they found that their head got quieter and quieter most nights to the point where they increasingly had nothing to jot down. Not always, but often. It was wonderfully rewarding for me personally to have someone I had helped evolve a tool I gave them into something even more effective that we both now share with others. As with a lot of things to do with anxiety, simply knowing there's something effective you can do with ease can make a huge difference - which is why I love your emphasis on developing habbits, because it's pointless trying to do something for the first time when you're really losing it, because it won't be easy until it's a habbit. And I'm no stranger to anxiety attacks, so please don't think I'm all book learning and no lived experience; yes I've got a psychology degree, various professional training, and I worked in mental health for years, but that started in my thirties and was driven by many years of living through hell. I'll shut up now else I'll get anxious about writing too much :-) I hope this helps someone.
I read the difference between an introvert and extravert is the introvert gets recharged when alone and an extravert gets recharged when with people. They both love to be with people, however. I found that to be true with me. I love being with people but my energy gets drained and I have to be recharged by being alone. I also have anxiety and found your video to be refreshing. Thank you. God bless!
I know exactly what you are going through. Most of the time I have no answer no rhyme or reason for it, it just comes from nowhere. Sometimes I am anxious about a simple task or something really important, and I just can't do it......I get what I call 'stuck' and then I get frustrated with myself because I feel so stupid. Coping strategies are: listening to music, dancing, going to the gym and meditation before bedtime. People with anxiety or depression (or both) are strong, we are fighters, you have to be, to have this and still deal with life. All the best, enjoying the Channel.
I admire your mind brevity!!!👍Often when anxiety is left unacknowledged and unexpressed, it can turn into frustration, which can lead to anger!!!Nice sharing!!!👍 You are a complete health-care center!!!💜
Just rewatched this. I saw it first many years ago. You are successful move to England helped to encourage me that maybe I could do the same, even though I am many many years older than you. The anxiety you spoke of in this video has definitely reared its ugly head. I recalled that you’d done a video on this very subject and found watching it to be very helpful. Thank you.
Thanks for sharing. I think we all need to talk more about things like this. If we've got a cold, hayfeever, feeling unwell, or sprained an ankle or something, or even just feeling a bit unwell we're all ready to talk about it. But anxiety and other mental issues, we pretend they're not there and put on a brave face, and that's not healthy.
I suffer from anxiety and always have done, even as a child. I have learned to appear completely cool and calm on the outside, but on the inside my heart races and my head spins. I have even had people comment on how chilled I am even in stressful situations. If only they knew what a mess I was inside. I am English living in France and well out of my comfort zone. Even after nearly 20 years of living here the simplest of tasks can be a real nightmare. My way of dealing with things is to try not to think about them before hand and then just throw myself in and see what happens. Lol. Anticipation just feeds anxiety.
Excellent video! Living in Iowa during the winter gave me anxiety from the lack of light and the kind of gray light. I found the light from candles and the fireplace to be enormously helpful, especially in the early morning.
It's really lovely from you to take the time to talk about this shitty feelings and feel you're not the only one! Thanks for the tips, and I know this video is kinda old but I'd love to see more long videos like this ❤️🌟
You are a very brave and inspirational young lady...Thanks for being so open and honest about a very difficult and personal subject...I hope everything works out well on this new and exciting chapter of your life.
Things which I find useful ... everyone is different of course. * mindfulness meditation * '7/11' breathing is supposed to be good (google it) * alone time * walking in the forest (I don't do enough of this ... very rarely leave the house when I don't *have* to) * the sleep hygiene you mentioned (getting to bed and up at regular times) * Bright blue lighting in the morning, shaded non-blue lights in the evening (a sort of sepia colour)
Always love your video's! 🤗 Just wanted to let you know, even though this is an older video of yours, with everything I'm going through at the moment, your words of wisdom have REALLY helped. I am going to try and calm my soul using some of your advice. THANK YOU!!!!!
Alanna, here's something that helped me tremendously early in my life...biofeedback, thus a form of meditation. It is stress management. I always turn to listening to music as well (I so much love Pink Floyd when David Gilmour is behind it). Everything you related is incredibly accurate...you are very wise. As is said even with investing...pay yourself first. Avoid self-medicating, especially with alcohol. For some with extreme cases of anxiety, medications might be necessary, but look to such that don't alter one's mind or promote sedation (I have one in mind that is merely a chemical change in the brain, and viola, the anxiety lessened tremendously. It requires a scrip.). I'd be a little careful with leaning on someone else too often, but it sounds you have a great support system in place between your Bo and family/friends. Yet another outstanding video!
A really nice video, thank you. I've found the "physical" coping mechanisms don't really work for me, my brain just goes round and round in circular thoughts and overrides everything. I try to ride it out psychologically, and just think, "remember, this too will pass". No-matter how stressed I feel in a particular moment, I think - at some point, maybe next hour, maybe tomorrow, maybe next week, this situation causing the anxiety will be over. So hey, it can't be that important, right, if it is temporary? That often works. And also "worst case scenario" - I think, "oh no, I feel so scared and awful, I can't go to work tomorrow, and then I might get sacked, I am WORTHLESS!" - you need to stop yourself and say, "actually, I have friends and family, you know, even in that situation, I'd just get another job" etc. And so if you can cope with the worst case scenario - well, it means you can handle anything! Anyway those work for me.
I taught myself to play the guitar and this is my personal way to de-stress or unwind. Music has amazing healing properties I think. Anyway Alanna, keep up the terrific work with your videos - you are bloody awesome!
I don't know why I'm watching this. This is such a feminine thing and I've always felt myself to be a blokey type bloke. I think I just like watching and listening to you..... nothing creepy, you're just very easy on the eye and ear! Thanks for your brave little post XXX :-))
Thank you for sharing how you deal with anxiety, Alanna. Great advice! It really makes sense and it is simple and easy to follow. Steve from Guelph, Canada.
"Other humans make you tired" and you "recharge when you're alone". Alana, you're a Jungian introvert! Me too. Check out the Myers Briggs personality preference assessment. :D
This is a great video on anxiety, and on mental health in general. Definitely seek help if you need it. Don't suffer in silence. And I'm totally with you with needing to schedule in "me-time". As much as I like people, they can be really energy draining and can leave me in a sloth-like state. Also, something I've found works well for when my girlfriend is having a bad episode is I grab a book, then we curl up together, and then I read to her. This usually always calms her down as her attention shifts to focus on only relaxing in my arms whilst listening to a familiar voice tell her a story.
Haha! I love the interlude "if you're still watching you're a saint". Great video :) I've had bad anxiety since I was a teenager, and at it's worst I couldn't even go to the supermarket without feeling like I was going to throw up and have a heart attack. I still can't go to places like the cinema. Anxiety makes no sense because part of my job involves going into operating theatres and taking xrays whilst a surgeon drills into peoples bones etc, you'd think that would be the thing to freak out about, go figure? I also find structure and exercise really help full, plus generally living a healthy lifestyle. You're dead right about just having to ride out panic attacks, I must have tried every angle and found that just accepting you're having a panic attack helps to get them over more quickly. I hate the paranoia which comes with anxiety too, it makes me feel really judged. Anyway, really glad you did a vid on this as I think it's good to talk about it :)
Hello! I just found your channel about an hour ago searching for videos about moving to the UK, which I am planning to do in August. I’m an Aussie with very British heritage and there’s something about going to England that feels like going home, even though I’ve never been. I’m a year and a bit late to this video but I’m also an anxiety sufferer! Mine’s OCD and anxiety, most specifically to my physical health but it occurs in other ways too. My biggest fear about moving to the UK is missing my family and anxiety giving me hell and not having my usual support network that I have here. But I don’t want to be an old lady in the future looking back on my life and regret not living a dream because anxiety and fear! I’m also majorly an introvert and totally relate to needing to be alone sometimes. I feel like you’re the Canadian version of me in some ways and it’s really great to see you thriving in the UK! It makes me confident that I can do it too 😄
Thank you so much, that's really sweet! I hope your move goes well - it can be really tough but it's the most rewarding thing I've ever done. And you can always return to Australia if the UK isn't for you :)
I was transplanted by the company I worked for from Manchester to Los Angeles , first time in very scary LA on my todd, my anxiety kicked in full force so I know what you mean about thinking you did the wrong thing...took me 3 weeks to adjust to it, jeez it was tough, the job sounded fun when I was at home... but the reality was a shocker, what with the culture shock and feeling out of my depth...anxiety is not fun and I hear you Alanna...
Hi Alanna, this video is super helpful to me as I’m going through the exact same thing. Do you think you could do an updated video on anxiety and share how you feel after a few more years in the UK? I’m hoping it gets better with time lol
Anxiety makes me thirsty as well, lol. I've made way too many videos about it on my channel. UA-cam is a great way for coping with anxiety. Keep up the good work and watch out for them flies as well! Great video!
Many of the things you talked about are similar for me in dealing with anxiety. I tend to spend time in comfortable places, like back at my parent's house and alone time is SUPER important. I throw myself into creative hobbies (music, gaming, writing, drawing, languages) and - oh, yes - LIST MAKING! My anxiety often manifests itself in a physical way like getting the shakes and incredibly painful stomach cramps. I've reduced those a fair bit by giving up caffeine (although tea is life, so I just moved to decaf instead of quitting). Given that I'm such a nervous wreck, I've never quite understood how I'm able to perform music on stage. But I've figured out that I create a sort of mental bubble around myself which blocks everything out, and as the gig goes on I allow that to slowly dissolve and let the audience in. Fortunately I'm not the centre of attention on stage anyway. Anxiety is a nagging voice that may never go away. But that's okay, because you can come to think of it as a companion which which you can get comfortable enough to tell to shut up. Also, NIN. Nice.
omg yes to everything! I also deal with anxiety and panic attacks and everything you say for copping is what i do as well. I also found for me i can't watch movies or tv shows that are too dramatic or intense. that just triggers everything. Thank you for bringing light to mental health! and having the courage to do it! it needs to be said. You are awesome! and i look forward to your next video!!
Your advice and solutions are great. I would also say keep busy and don't hide from the world. Experiences build confidence. The two most anxious people I know have led quite sheltered lives with too much time to overthink everything. The occasional alcoholic drink can help with social situations but don't come to rely too much on it. When I had very bad anxiety, I went to see a GP who was young male and seemed like he had never experienced such a thing. GPs are often hardened scientists, but at least I got some sedatives. I only ever took one and carried another around in my pocket. I never used it but it was a great comfort knowing I had it to hand. Eventually the anxiety started to go. I learned a bit about my triggers too, just from observations.
Thank you for your word of wisdom. As a male I find it hard to be open about my anxiety due to my own stupidity, or cultural norms, I'm not sure but it's difficult. I've found that early morning hikes (2-4 miles) in the local parks help quite a bit. It's my time to do a mental reset while getting fresh air, some vitamin D and getting the lungs pumping before going to work. It's also nice when I cross paths with other people because there is usually a short and pleasant exchange of words, good morning, it's a beautiful day, have a nice day, it's just always some uplifting exchange that helps get the day off on the right foot.
Love, I could write a book on it. Meds changed my life. But drinking with meds nearly killed me. Not for a medical emergency, a civil emergency. The police nearly shot me dead. That's enough to make anyone anxious!
Wow- that was absolutely amazing! I started having really bad anxiety problems about two years ago, totally out of the blue after having bumbled along for 60 years with no problems. All your coping strategies are exactly the ones I have slowly homed in on, yes, they do work and yes, there is a slow improvement. Breathing techniques - make me feel ten times worse, although so many people recommend them. I also sometimes tend to panic when I'm going to sleep. I find that thinking through a task I'm going to do in minute detail sometimes helps - for example, going to plant a tree, get key to toolshed, get small spade, put compost in wheelbarrow etc. etc. - fill my mind with trivia and the panic can subside. Maybe that would work for you? You come over as an incredibly confident and together person, but maybe we get good at hiding our problems. Every good wish to you (and I love your videos!).
+Adventures and Naps great video! it's an amazing thing that you're admitting your anxiety publically and offering your personal coping mechanisms (also I noted your asking for other ppls recommendations, i hope you get some more methods to try) however I would say "that applies to any country you move to" isn't true... imagine moving to a country where you don't speak the language and they rarely speak English except your partner... go to the shops, you cant speak to them or read anything! you can't even use the bus let alone a phone! I would imagine anyone's anxiety would be 100x worse, and for an anxious person that would be off the scale! still, keep up the video content it's always refreshing to see :)
Yeah, I can relate to pretty much everything you said actually. I've tried meditation, it's actually not bad! I did the free trial with the Headspace app! I might get the paid one, not sure, we'll see. But yeah, all the methods you mentioned are great; exercise, routine + things to look forward to, socialising + alone-time, sleep a good amount. Explore hobbies! Try something new. This opens opportunities for social interaction, fills some downtime, and ofc you might enjoy the activity itself! When growing up we're taught to organise the boring parts of life (education, work, homework etc). We're not taught to organise something that we didn't think needed it, but as you get older you realise it does; fun! Don't forget to schedule something fun around your work. Breathing exercises; breathe in for 4 counts, hold for 4, release over 4 etc. Mindfulness exercises like focusing on sounds that you hear, or noticing the room around you, or examining how each of you body parts are feeling right now. Therapy/counselling to talk and learn other techniques. Advice from a nurse/doctor, maybe even discuss drugs to see if they help. Loads of tips there, but I know too well what it's like suffering from anxiety and depression. Sometimes you make use of some of these tips and start to feel good, but then it doesn't take much to knock you down again. These ofc aren't a cure unfortunately, but so long as you try to get back up, it can be manageable.
Thank you so much for your comment, lots of really good points!! It's always helpful for people to talk about their experiences, share what works for them, etc, than pretend we've never felt anxiety and/or depression before. Thank you!!
Great video Alanna! I loved the way you worked to identify your anxiety and then separate it from those other feelings (feeling like you had made a mistake or something). That's huge. And awesome! Great work! :)
Loving your video's ☺ I relate to you a lot. I know what it's like for someone to tell me that I'm just exaggerating and for them to say that they get anxious too - but it's not the same. They don't actually understand what it's like living with it so for them it's kind of a joke? It's easy for them to tell us to calm down or not to cry but for us it's so real and *overwhelming*. Hopefully if I am able to immigrate in the future and you're still living in England, I'd love to meet you! I'm not someone who likes routine, I work long hours so it's the same thing everyday. I don't really get to go out alone which I feel would help a little to be more independent? But I've had the opportunity (shopping alone) and I had a bit of an anxiety attack for being left alone and got it done faster than what I would if someone was with me. As for exercise, I feel like it would help but after a long day I can't bring myself to do it. I also get these overwhelming times where I just need to cry and my chest feels heavy. Thank you for sharing this, I don't feel so alone after finding someone who is saying so many things I can relate to. Having someone say relax really does not 'relax' you 🙁
coping for me mostly is through venting to my friends or just having a nice chat with one close friend, but sometimes when these people aren't available, through no fault of their own, it can become really depressing thinking that there is no one there
I don’t claim, in a million years, to have a blanket cure for anxiety, that works for everyone; but for me, I had to acknowledge that anxiety is a natural part of the human condition. It exists if we like it, or not; and it is essential for survival. For me, anxiety was only ever a problem if it had nothing “real” to “latch on to”; I would start to internalize the anxiety and there it could become pathological. A self-perpetuating fear-of-fear! For me the solution was twofold. 1: exhaustive physical exercise took care of the hormonal symptomatology. (Using the excess adrenaline, if you will) 2: I now fly airplanes for a living, and while this is not particularly dangerous; it does provide me with a “vessel” to accommodate any anxious cognitions. I truly believe that tiny doses of controlled danger can really help some people. I wish you the best!
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Healthy body, health mind. Being motivated and having a goal also helps a great deal. Feeling like you're in control of what's going on also puts you in a better state of mind and avoids getting all worked up over what can be, essentially, nothing. Having a routine allows you to feel like you're in control of what's going on in your life and also helps to take your mind off things, to some degree. Anxiety is probably one of the worse things to experience, especially if it's something that catches you by surprise and you're in a situation where you feel you can't do anything about it. A lot of the time, you have to, 'sit it out', and try and work through it. But, it's great to be able to have certain strategies to combat the feelings that can so easily develop into what's colloquially described as a, 'panic attack.' I find that if I acknowledge and recognise what's going on, then I accept it and don't allow it to stop me doing whatever it is I'm doing. Like with any obstacle, you never stop, but instead find a way to work around it.
16:54 - P R E A C H I T ! Much of what you said about how you cope and deal resonates with my own experience, although exercise has never done anything for me (I have no idea what an endorphin rush feels like despite plenty of exercise both when young and bouts of using an exercise bike as an adult). Routine is a big help, and I really dig that need for accomplishment (happily I'd just finished hanging up a load of laundry when you talked about setting yourself the goal of doing the same). When I first heard about mindfulness I was sceptical, but then realised I *already practices it in my own way*. If I feel that rising panic then concentrating only on immediate sensations in the moment can help a lot. I know you feel crappy, I know you get these panic attacks, but really you're doing great overall (far better than I have in life). I guess keep on doin' what yer doin' :) .
Well, that's the little goal I set myself of having you like/comment on one of my comments on your videos fulfilled :). I hope you're having a great day too!
Love your videos and this one really resonates with me and my own issues with anxiety. I agree with everything you've said for coping with anxiety but one tip I have for a fairly mild attack is I have someone talk to me. About anything and everything EXCEPT how I'm feeling. So while they're chatting away about the latest celebrity break up or the weather, I do some deep breathing. The breathing and distraction of someone talking absolute bollocks to me really calms me down and I can carry on with my day. Thanks for sharing as mental health issues need to be talked about :) x
Wow you've just described how I feel most of the time. I don't really have panic attacks that much but everything else yes and the way I like to cope is being alone and watching tv or UA-cam or just put some music on.
Great video, I agree with all the techniques described here. One thing I have found useful for myself is Yoga. Yoga is very good for anxiety as it brings you 'into the moment' on a regular basis and, after doing it for some time, it allows you to recognise earlier when anxious feelings are beginning in your body and gives you a chance to separate them from your other emotions.
That's a great suggestion! I've just started meditation which focuses on bringing you into the moment as well, definitely has been helping me. Thanks for watching!
Dude, this sounds a lot like me, especially the night-time panic attacks. I used to get mad anxiety when I lived in Canada, away from my family. But now I take meds and cut down on caffiene to stop me feeling terrible. Yay.
I am the most relaxed person alive and nothing phases me. It’s like I’m very self contained and I can manage in all situations. I’ve been alone a lot in my life so I’ve had to have issue resources. But when my daughter was born she was very anxious from birth and I’d just sit with her and breath with her. That motion of getting our breaths in sync seemed to help her a lot. And fold look at her and try and convey calm confidence lol. Crazy but it worked for her..
I usually deal with anxiety by doing physical work such as washing dishes or sweeping the floor. Long walks outdoors also help. You should get a fly swatter.
Great video, I reckon anxiety is closely related to stress--and todays society is so stressful--we are bombarded from all angles mostly by other peoples expectations. We live in a rat race which cynically pigeon holes us sometimes into roles unsuitable for our personalities--music helps me, so does helping others ( makes me feel useful and raises my self esteem), gardening etc you have to make a serious effort to try and be happy.
What a wonderful way to put things, after I discovered I had a life changing medical health issue that I will never fully recover from I learnt a lot about dealing with life and being me, i live by a golden rule which I ask myself constantly when I have a problem or something I don't like or want to do "Can I do something about it" Yes or No ? Yes = Do it, No - Don't worry about it, there's nothing you can do to change the outcome. I also try to have fun and laugh every day. x
Love your honesty Alanna. Thank you for sharing your personal experiences and helping others to deal with theirs. I suffered with severe anxiety for 20 years, until I discovered something called The DARE Response by Barry McDonagh. The simple 'take away' message is that instead of running away from it, tell your anxiety to "BRING IT ON!" and watch it disappear as quickly as it arrived! I know it sounds crazy, but nothing else works as fast and prevents it from returning, because you learn not to fear the fear :) xx
I couldn't believe it at first and was afraid I'd die from testing anxiety ... Turns out that the little voice in our heads doesn't like to stick around when we challenge it to do it's worst. It's like a paper tiger!
A very good video displaying a wisdom beyond your years. Music works for me personally. Drinking water is a good idea, too much coffee can heighten anxiety, so I have just one cup in the morning. By the way, Alanna, you work in a further education college (?). These can be very toxic places in which to work, and can heighten anxiety.
I would say I suffer low level anxiety. It's worst if I wake up in the early hours of the morning. I try to get back to sleep but stuff that has been worrying me but I have kept a lid on just surfaces. As soon as that happens I know I will not get back to sleep so I go downstairs and absorb myself in a PS4 game for an hour or 2 until I feel tired. Usually I can get another hour or two sleep before I have to get up for work. My daughter also suffers, probably worse than me, she uses Bach flower remedies, they seem to help her. Great video as always. Keep it up.
I absolutely agree with your PS4 idea - there's no reason to stay in bed anxious/upset, it'll just make you associate sleeping with anxiety! I love getting my mind absorbed into something as well, whether video game, really good book, etc. I hope your daughter is doing well, too :)
‘Humans you make me tired’ haha I can really relate to that. My coping mechanism is weed at the wkends, but I know that makes some people more anxious. For me it totally clears all that crap out of my head, it’s like hitting the reset button.
Anxiety is a nightmare on it's own. You hit a lot of good points in your bog. Lot of the things I do myself. Gym is not about bodybuilding it's to release the endorphins and pent up energy. Times it gets so bad I am like a coiled spring. Other times when it a 1 on your scale I can sit back and watch life pass me by. You are right when you said it's hard for some people to understand it. Lot of people have it but just don't know. I do the thumb on finger and listen to music and talk about it to friends. Heart out to you and I will be sharing this blog with Facebook. It's one of your best ones yet. :)
Totally random comment here and maybe not the best video to post it on considering the subject matter (it happened while on this one though) but as I was listening to you, the video kept buffering and freezing and some of the frozen faces you (inadvertently) made were so cute.......That's British cute too btw.
I know this is an old video but loved it. All great advice, I use mostly the same methods to manage mine okay. Will never go away, but once you have the methods you feel it less and you can live your life. Anyway, thank you, it's nice to know it's not just me :-)
When I sleep too much I get really depressing dreams about things and people from the past which tends to make me pretty down and overall grim for the first part of the day. Just thought I'd share that as had that very experience a few days ago.
I have just been made redundant and have been suffering with anxiety for the last few weeks. I had not suffered with it for years. Thanks for this vid. What's embarrassing is I am 51.
It’s quite funny, I can relate to your symptoms in every way. The symptoms do subside over time. I find keeping busy is good and doing stuff to keep your mind occupied; I have quite a physical job so that helps. As you described, exercise is definitely one of the best things you can do for anxiety. Getting rid of the adrenaline boiling inside your body with a run or a cycle ride works. The workout must be intense. You must take time out to relax; get a good relaxation app for your phone and listen to it to eventually gain complete calmness, this will help when you reach those anxiety highs. Giving yourself tasks ie going out for the evening with friends, going away for the weekend etc is good way to overcome fears as when they’re completed you’ll feel good about it. Stay off the caffeine, it will only heighten the anxiety. Most importantly (for me), don’t drink too much alcohol, the hangover or even slightly hung over will make your chances of getting anxiety much higher; alcohol is a depressant. It might feel great when you’re doing it but the next day you’ll pay for it! Understanding of why you’re suffering with anxiety is important, unpick your life prior to your anxiety, then, take steps to reverse the effect that particular issue had on you, for instance, you may have been unhappy in your job etc. I had my first anxiety attack when I was 17 and got over it and spent many years anxiety free! It came back a little lately but I know it’s only a phase. Good luck with yours.
I don't know if this will help or not. Back in the 60s, I learned a two word phrase that has served me well. "Shit Happens" I know I can't change errors I have made. I know I have to deal with the consequences and I am aware I have to move on. What kept me motivated was being told, "O, you can't do that". My structure was the challenge of doing, often successfully, what I was told I could not do. I quickly learned to eliminate ALL nay-sayers from my life. Like you, I required someone to listen, non-critically, to my babble, but when they were not available, I began writing. Feelings on paper, now I use a laptop, made them more valid and far less intimidating. I rarely drink and I left my weed smoking back in the 60s and 70s. I have never taken medication other than painkillers or antibiotics. I have fears like everyone else, but anything short of "worst case scenario" I consider a win. There is, for me, no plan or purpose beyond what I choose to make. I used to have two plaques on my desk. 'Tanstaafl' (There ain't no such thing as a free lunch) and "illegitimi non carborundum" (Don't let the bastards grind you down) It works, but does give rise to cynicism.
My tips for people are:- Exercise, go running. Download the NHS C25K free mp3 podcasts for beginner runners. Cut out caffeine just drink decaf coffee and have less tea and sugar filled foods. Get a good nights sleep. Write down lists of things you need to do / get done instead of worrying and remembering. Don't take on more than you know you can complete, but make sure you complete what you start. Music or some quiet time alone away from TV, Internet and people may help. Google meditation and breathing techniques. If you ruminate allow only 1 day a week you can do this, and on the other days say no I have to wait until e.g. Friday's if I have these thoughts. If you are reading this hope it helps :) Nearly forgot.... listen to ASMR videos on youtube or twitch, try to have an open mind these may help greatly.
i totally relate. I moved a. ver familiar place. a small town i was in for 15 years to a city and its overwhelming. Im used to seeing the same faces and places. Its very strange
Anxiety is truly horrible. I’ve struggled with it for the past few years since my Mum died. Spent many a day/night in A&E and was nearly hospitalised with it. My GP was brilliant and I was lucky and managed to see a really good consultant psychiatrist through the NHS. Slowly getting there and chilling on UA-cam, listening to music and podcasts and going for walks helps. X
Devastated to learn of your attacks. relieved to know you have understanding and loving people around you to help cope. As I have remarked before, keep smiling, it's what makes the world go round.
Hi Alanna, for some reason I found myself re-watching this video today, it rang so many bells with me. I’m 52 now and I suffered from anxiety since my school days and it’s not good, I have a limited social life and I avoid unfamiliar situations. Over the years I have just developed the attitude to push through and tell myself it won’t be as bad as you think, for the most part this has worked, but I still have social anxiety but I just grit my teeth and move forwards. Take care.
Great video, I suffer with anxiety and depression and find most people don’t understand. I always know if a panic attack is coming on and get myself to a safe place and do deep breathing. The comment I hate the most is pull yourself together, like that really works! Hope you are still loving living here in the UK.
Thank you so much for your comment! Finding a safe space is a really good point. Thanks for watching :)
It's mind-blowing how many people suffer from anxiety and depression yet we feel we are alone and misunderstood.
People: Pull yourself together, breathe, calm down.
Me: Get the f**k out. Before I strangle you. Strangle you to the point where you feel.like.I.do.
Given your fairly extreme levels of anxiety its nothing short of a miracle that you actually left the comfort of home! You should really be pleased and proud of yourself to survive independently for 2 years. I suffer no anxieties really and i would struggle to live in a foreign country. Kudos
I was diagnosed with agoraphobia when I was 15. Very difficult thing to live with. People tend to view mental illness as something you should be able to, "Pull yourself out of it".
It's not like that, it's akin to anything else you may suffer with.
It's amazing to hear you have similar anxiety issues, I hope you are ok from now on. I'm trying hardest I can, plus following every structured meeting and discussion.
Agoraphobia is something that makes a regular man feel like less than a man.
Can't believe I'm typing this and letting you know. But I am very drunk, so bollocks to it.
Girl, I love this video! Thank you for the candid chat. I suffer from anxiety too and found myself nodding along with so much of this video. I'm a lover of routine too; I go to the gym on certain days, etc. and hate it when that changes and get really panicky! I've had exes in the past make fun of me needing to stick to this routine which definitely didn't help! I'm a weird combination of an extrovert with anxiety so sometimes I struggle going out to see people but then spend every second regretting being at home and beating myself up for not going. Having said that, the odd bit of alone time is super important to me too. Basically, I agree with everything you said in this video and also have similar coping strategies!
Found your UA-cam channel recently found your videos fun to watch, I live in the UK in the Kent area too 🙂 but found this video in particular v helpful thx for sharing and being so honest.
As a sufferer of anxiety I'd like to thank you for talking about this subject so openly. My anxiety has been so bad it often stopped me from venturing outside. I even missed my own Mother's birthday party because of it. But I am receiving medical help now and things are getting much better (cognitive therapy is a great thing). Anxiety is often such a lonely condition and It really helps to hear that other people understand. x
Personally I throw myself into listening to different types of music; which helps a lot. Thanks for doing this video; I know it can be difficult to be so open with anyone. You are not a failure; you have moved to a completely new place and are coping better than I would.
this is great advice for people suffering with anxiety. My personal trick which was the only thing that helped stop a period of near constant panic attacks was to embrace the anxiety and stop resisting it. Whenever i felt it escalating I would just urge it to go ahead and do it´s worst, almost as soon as i stop resisting the panic stops and things return to normal.
You can´t hold back the wave of panic when it comes, it´s too powerful and trying to hold it back just makes it worse for longer, let is move through you like water flowing around a rock.
Thanks for making this, Alanna. I feel you a lot on this. Getting stuck inside of your own head is something I've been dealing with my whole life and, for me, I've turned to music and video games. Just having something to focus on, analyse, and drown out that pesky downer voice is huge. My noise cancelling headphones are my most prized possession for this very reason :) Cheers again, bud! - a Kiwi adapting to UK life
Blessed are the anxious, for they will inherit the world...but then what will they do with it?
Alanna, thank you for being able to discuss this.
I lovehow you leave bloopers in ( the fly) most vloggers would edit it out.... it's so funny, and shows your great sense of humour
It is not silly to cry out loud. From someone who suffers with anxiety also you offer excellent advice which I am trying to follow. Good for you talking about panic attacks trying to get to sleep. Only thought about this recently but you have words which I can appreciate.
Thanks for doing this one, takes a lot of courage to discuss stuff like this, since watching this I have started eating more in the mornings and drinking more water, and just a few small changes have made a big difference, I'm not so stressed out at work and feel more calm, thanks from the USA
Where to start... So much. I struggle with anxiety and depression and it's sometimes hard to differentiate the two because for example depression can manifest as irritability. Sometimes I'm so focused on dealing with one and then the other shows up and I need to get my bearings. I also find exercise helpful and watching what I eat and there's a very fine line between exercising to "punish" yourself or to force yourself and doing it as a self-care thing and as a source for a feeling of accomplishment. I also find it helpful to feel what I'm feeling and accept it rather than freak out and listen to the stressed out thoughts about what I should be doing, which are not very wise thoughts for the most part. Finding a balance between avoiding anxiety triggers and actually doing them and seeing it wasn't so bad is also something I try to do. For example if I'm anxious about leaving the house I try to remind myself how nice it felt last times I did it and how I'm missing out by letting the anxiety win. But I also try not to push myself too much. So if I did a few things that day it's okay not to do all the anxiety provoking things and just cuddle with the cats and watch UA-cam videos. Doing things that feel good and boost confidence help, too, like you said about cleaning and errands but it can be more things. Giving myself credit for things I did despite anxiety and judging how true the anxious thoughts were after the fact help with reducing the credibility of those anxious thoughts.
I love this vid. I was surprised to see it having watched a bunch of your others, but this is my territory - not just personally, but professionally - so it's great to see something mental health related randomly thrown into the mix. It's an awesome indicator of how talking about mental health is becoming more and more accepted. So firstly, thank you. Just thank you.
I could literally write forever on this (I'm a writer developing a charity focused on mental health resources, so I actually will be writing about this for as long as I'm able), so I'll just add one thing:
There's a lot of really simple and effective stuff here. I won't comment on everything, I'll simply add something to your point about lists, which is great, as a sense of achievement, however small, can really help to quiet a self-attacking mind. One really useful trick with lists to help maximise the esteem boost which can be part of combatting anxiety (as well as depression), is to break down tasks into discrete parts. E.g., rather than having "doing the laundry" as one item, which becomes a stick with which to beat yourself if you don't get it all done from start to finish in one go, it can be broken down into: 1 - sort whites from colours, 2 wash whites, 3 hang whites on radiators/line/dry in machine, 4 wash colours, 5 fold whites (if dry) etc etc.
This way if all you manage to achieve in a day is get the whites and colours seperated and get the whites washed but the colours are still in a pile on the bedroom floor, you have got two ticks to boost your esteem rather than a big fat zero because you didn't complete the whole job. It sounds absurdly simplistic but it's very effective. That sense of achievement is crucial when you have a head that likes to torment you.
And I will throw one other thing in: the notebook by the bedside is an old but invaluable tool. When your head won't shut up it can really help to jot down what's playing on your mind (no electronic devices though as this will stimulate your brain and further impede the onset of sleep, so good old fashioned pen and paper is best). Bullet points or your own form of short hand is sufficient; chances are you won't even read half of what you write, but it can help short-circuit the circus in your head that's detemined to rob you of sleep; in addition, if certain themes keeping rearing their head, noting them down, especially if they are vague and fragmented, can help them evolve into more coherent thoughts over time - not least because the unconscious can work wonders when we're asleep.
This can help both with gradually bringing the root of specific anxieties into conscious focus to be worked on in a structured way (possibly with a therapist if you so choose), and over time the very practice can become part of a ritual that instructs your brain to "switch off now because it's time to sleep". I worked with one person who developed this to the point where they actively sought five things to jot down before putting their head on the pillow, and within a few months they found that their head got quieter and quieter most nights to the point where they increasingly had nothing to jot down. Not always, but often. It was wonderfully rewarding for me personally to have someone I had helped evolve a tool I gave them into something even more effective that we both now share with others.
As with a lot of things to do with anxiety, simply knowing there's something effective you can do with ease can make a huge difference - which is why I love your emphasis on developing habbits, because it's pointless trying to do something for the first time when you're really losing it, because it won't be easy until it's a habbit. And I'm no stranger to anxiety attacks, so please don't think I'm all book learning and no lived experience; yes I've got a psychology degree, various professional training, and I worked in mental health for years, but that started in my thirties and was driven by many years of living through hell.
I'll shut up now else I'll get anxious about writing too much :-)
I hope this helps someone.
J B Hi, Just wanted to say I found your comments v helpful, do you have a link to the website for your developing mental health issues website. Thx
I read the difference between an introvert and extravert is the introvert gets recharged when alone and an extravert gets recharged when with people. They both love to be with people, however. I found that to be true with me. I love being with people but my energy gets drained and I have to be recharged by being alone. I also have anxiety and found your video to be refreshing. Thank you. God bless!
Just found this video and your channel. You are freshing and honest. I’m now subscribed and looking forward to your content xx
I know exactly what you are going through. Most of the time I have no answer no rhyme or reason for it, it just comes from nowhere. Sometimes I am anxious about a simple task or something really important, and I just can't do it......I get what I call 'stuck' and then I get frustrated with myself because I feel so stupid. Coping strategies are: listening to music, dancing, going to the gym and meditation before bedtime.
People with anxiety or depression (or both) are strong, we are fighters, you have to be, to have this and still deal with life. All the best, enjoying the Channel.
I admire your mind brevity!!!👍Often when anxiety is left unacknowledged and unexpressed, it can turn into frustration, which can lead to anger!!!Nice sharing!!!👍 You are a complete health-care center!!!💜
Just rewatched this. I saw it first many years ago. You are successful move to England helped to encourage me that maybe I could do the same, even though I am many many years older than you. The anxiety you spoke of in this video has definitely reared its ugly head. I recalled that you’d done a video on this very subject and found watching it to be very helpful. Thank you.
Thanks for sharing. I think we all need to talk more about things like this. If we've got a cold, hayfeever, feeling unwell, or sprained an ankle or something, or even just feeling a bit unwell we're all ready to talk about it. But anxiety and other mental issues, we pretend they're not there and put on a brave face, and that's not healthy.
I suffer from anxiety and always have done, even as a child. I have learned to appear completely cool and calm on the outside, but on the inside my heart races and my head spins. I have even had people comment on how chilled I am even in stressful situations. If only they knew what a mess I was inside. I am English living in France and well out of my comfort zone. Even after nearly 20 years of living here the simplest of tasks can be a real nightmare. My way of dealing with things is to try not to think about them before hand and then just throw myself in and see what happens. Lol. Anticipation just feeds anxiety.
Excellent video! Living in Iowa during the winter gave me anxiety from the lack of light and the kind of gray light. I found the light from candles and the fireplace to be enormously helpful, especially in the early morning.
It's really lovely from you to take the time to talk about this shitty feelings and feel you're not the only one! Thanks for the tips, and I know this video is kinda old but I'd love to see more long videos like this ❤️🌟
Shes a real survivor, very strong minded, well done elana, gym is a good healer for sure
I really can relate. I use to mistake my anxiety for just being shy. Videos like these really help people know they aren't alone. #ytqueens
PinkPlatinum Really funny you should say that, I was never sure my anxiety was a result of my shyness or vice versa.
That's interesting, I never thought of them being linked before, but I guess my shyness and anxiety are really two branches of the same tree.
I've always been shy my whole life around new people, and Alanna has just described everything I feel.
You are a very brave and inspirational young lady...Thanks for being so open and honest about a very difficult and personal subject...I hope everything works out well on this new and exciting chapter of your life.
"Let's talk about anxiety" (takes glug of vodka and lashes out at a fly)....Our English solutions to such issues are clearly rubbing off on you.
🤣 Dude. So English.
OutCleanPro hahaha
Thanks for talking about this! It’s such a important topic and it helps to know other understand how we feel.
Things which I find useful ... everyone is different of course.
* mindfulness meditation
* '7/11' breathing is supposed to be good (google it)
* alone time
* walking in the forest (I don't do enough of this ... very rarely leave the house when I don't *have* to)
* the sleep hygiene you mentioned (getting to bed and up at regular times)
* Bright blue lighting in the morning, shaded non-blue lights in the evening (a sort of sepia colour)
Always love your video's! 🤗 Just wanted to let you know, even though this is an older video of yours, with everything I'm going through at the moment, your words of wisdom have REALLY helped. I am going to try and calm my soul using some of your advice. THANK YOU!!!!!
Alanna, here's something that helped me tremendously early in my life...biofeedback, thus a form of meditation. It is stress management. I always turn to listening to music as well (I so much love Pink Floyd when David Gilmour is behind it). Everything you related is incredibly accurate...you are very wise. As is said even with investing...pay yourself first. Avoid self-medicating, especially with alcohol. For some with extreme cases of anxiety, medications might be necessary, but look to such that don't alter one's mind or promote sedation (I have one in mind that is merely a chemical change in the brain, and viola, the anxiety lessened tremendously. It requires a scrip.). I'd be a little careful with leaning on someone else too often, but it sounds you have a great support system in place between your Bo and family/friends. Yet another outstanding video!
Very brave to share this Alanna, and the practical tips on how to help are very useful
A really nice video, thank you. I've found the "physical" coping mechanisms don't really work for me, my brain just goes round and round in circular thoughts and overrides everything. I try to ride it out psychologically, and just think, "remember, this too will pass". No-matter how stressed I feel in a particular moment, I think - at some point, maybe next hour, maybe tomorrow, maybe next week, this situation causing the anxiety will be over. So hey, it can't be that important, right, if it is temporary? That often works. And also "worst case scenario" - I think, "oh no, I feel so scared and awful, I can't go to work tomorrow, and then I might get sacked, I am WORTHLESS!" - you need to stop yourself and say, "actually, I have friends and family, you know, even in that situation, I'd just get another job" etc. And so if you can cope with the worst case scenario - well, it means you can handle anything! Anyway those work for me.
I taught myself to play the guitar and this is my personal way to de-stress or unwind. Music has amazing healing properties I think.
Anyway Alanna, keep up the terrific work with your videos - you are bloody awesome!
I don't know why I'm watching this. This is such a feminine thing and I've always felt myself to be a blokey type bloke. I think I just like watching and listening to you..... nothing creepy, you're just very easy on the eye and ear! Thanks for your brave little post XXX :-))
Thank you for sharing how you deal with anxiety, Alanna. Great advice! It really makes sense and it is simple and easy to follow. Steve from Guelph, Canada.
"Other humans make you tired" and you "recharge when you're alone". Alana, you're a Jungian introvert! Me too. Check out the Myers Briggs personality preference assessment. :D
This is a great video on anxiety, and on mental health in general. Definitely seek help if you need it. Don't suffer in silence.
And I'm totally with you with needing to schedule in "me-time". As much as I like people, they can be really energy draining and can leave me in a sloth-like state.
Also, something I've found works well for when my girlfriend is having a bad episode is I grab a book, then we curl up together, and then I read to her. This usually always calms her down as her attention shifts to focus on only relaxing in my arms whilst listening to a familiar voice tell her a story.
Reading to someone is a wonderful idea!! Thanks for watching :)
Haha! I love the interlude "if you're still watching you're a saint". Great video :) I've had bad anxiety since I was a teenager, and at it's worst I couldn't even go to the supermarket without feeling like I was going to throw up and have a heart attack. I still can't go to places like the cinema. Anxiety makes no sense because part of my job involves going into operating theatres and taking xrays whilst a surgeon drills into peoples bones etc, you'd think that would be the thing to freak out about, go figure? I also find structure and exercise really help full, plus generally living a healthy lifestyle. You're dead right about just having to ride out panic attacks, I must have tried every angle and found that just accepting you're having a panic attack helps to get them over more quickly. I hate the paranoia which comes with anxiety too, it makes me feel really judged. Anyway, really glad you did a vid on this as I think it's good to talk about it :)
Thank you so much for your kind comments, it's nice to know other people go through the same thing!
Hello! I just found your channel about an hour ago searching for videos about moving to the UK, which I am planning to do in August. I’m an Aussie with very British heritage and there’s something about going to England that feels like going home, even though I’ve never been.
I’m a year and a bit late to this video but I’m also an anxiety sufferer! Mine’s OCD and anxiety, most specifically to my physical health but it occurs in other ways too. My biggest fear about moving to the UK is missing my family and anxiety giving me hell and not having my usual support network that I have here. But I don’t want to be an old lady in the future looking back on my life and regret not living a dream because anxiety and fear! I’m also majorly an introvert and totally relate to needing to be alone sometimes.
I feel like you’re the Canadian version of me in some ways and it’s really great to see you thriving in the UK! It makes me confident that I can do it too 😄
Thank you so much, that's really sweet! I hope your move goes well - it can be really tough but it's the most rewarding thing I've ever done. And you can always return to Australia if the UK isn't for you :)
I was transplanted by the company I worked for from Manchester to Los Angeles , first time in very scary LA on my todd, my anxiety kicked in full force so I know what you mean about thinking you did the wrong thing...took me 3 weeks to adjust to it, jeez it was tough, the job sounded fun when I was at home... but the reality was a shocker, what with the culture shock and feeling out of my depth...anxiety is not fun and I hear you Alanna...
Hi Alanna, this video is super helpful to me as I’m going through the exact same thing. Do you think you could do an updated video on anxiety and share how you feel after a few more years in the UK? I’m hoping it gets better with time lol
Anxiety makes me thirsty as well, lol. I've made way too many videos about it on my channel. UA-cam is a great way for coping with anxiety. Keep up the good work and watch out for them flies as well! Great video!
Many of the things you talked about are similar for me in dealing with anxiety. I tend to spend time in comfortable places, like back at my parent's house and alone time is SUPER important. I throw myself into creative hobbies (music, gaming, writing, drawing, languages) and - oh, yes - LIST MAKING! My anxiety often manifests itself in a physical way like getting the shakes and incredibly painful stomach cramps. I've reduced those a fair bit by giving up caffeine (although tea is life, so I just moved to decaf instead of quitting).
Given that I'm such a nervous wreck, I've never quite understood how I'm able to perform music on stage. But I've figured out that I create a sort of mental bubble around myself which blocks everything out, and as the gig goes on I allow that to slowly dissolve and let the audience in. Fortunately I'm not the centre of attention on stage anyway.
Anxiety is a nagging voice that may never go away. But that's okay, because you can come to think of it as a companion which which you can get comfortable enough to tell to shut up.
Also, NIN. Nice.
Just watching this video helped! Thankyou :) its nice to know youre not alone
omg yes to everything! I also deal with anxiety and panic attacks and everything you say for copping is what i do as well. I also found for me i can't watch movies or tv shows that are too dramatic or intense. that just triggers everything. Thank you for bringing light to mental health! and having the courage to do it! it needs to be said. You are awesome! and i look forward to your next video!!
Thank you so much!!!! Anxiety/panic attacks can be so isolating so it's really comforting knowing that so many others go through the same thing x
Your advice and solutions are great. I would also say keep busy and don't hide from the world. Experiences build confidence. The two most anxious people I know have led quite sheltered lives with too much time to overthink everything. The occasional alcoholic drink can help with social situations but don't come to rely too much on it. When I had very bad anxiety, I went to see a GP who was young male and seemed like he had never experienced such a thing. GPs are often hardened scientists, but at least I got some sedatives. I only ever took one and carried another around in my pocket. I never used it but it was a great comfort knowing I had it to hand. Eventually the anxiety started to go. I learned a bit about my triggers too, just from observations.
Thank you for your word of wisdom. As a male I find it hard to be open about my anxiety due to my own stupidity, or cultural norms, I'm not sure but it's difficult. I've found that early morning hikes (2-4 miles) in the local parks help quite a bit. It's my time to do a mental reset while getting fresh air, some vitamin D and getting the lungs pumping before going to work. It's also nice when I cross paths with other people because there is usually a short and pleasant exchange of words, good morning, it's a beautiful day, have a nice day, it's just always some uplifting exchange that helps get the day off on the right foot.
Lets talk about Anxiety, lol grabs drink.... you rock girl
Love, I could write a book on it. Meds changed my life. But drinking with meds nearly killed me. Not for a medical emergency, a civil emergency. The police nearly shot me dead. That's enough to make anyone anxious!
Wow- that was absolutely amazing! I started having really bad anxiety problems about two years ago, totally out of the blue after having bumbled along for 60 years with no problems. All your coping strategies are exactly the ones I have slowly homed in on, yes, they do work and yes, there is a slow improvement. Breathing techniques - make me feel ten times worse, although so many people recommend them. I also sometimes tend to panic when I'm going to sleep. I find that thinking through a task I'm going to do in minute detail sometimes helps - for example, going to plant a tree, get key to toolshed, get small spade, put compost in wheelbarrow etc. etc. - fill my mind with trivia and the panic can subside. Maybe that would work for you? You come over as an incredibly confident and together person, but maybe we get good at hiding our problems. Every good wish to you (and I love your videos!).
Thank you very much, appreciate all the support!
+Adventures and Naps great video! it's an amazing thing that you're admitting your anxiety publically and offering your personal coping mechanisms (also I noted your asking for other ppls recommendations, i hope you get some more methods to try)
however I would say "that applies to any country you move to" isn't true...
imagine moving to a country where you don't speak the language and they rarely speak English except your partner... go to the shops, you cant speak to them or read anything!
you can't even use the bus let alone a phone! I would imagine anyone's anxiety would be 100x worse, and for an anxious person that would be off the scale!
still, keep up the video content it's always refreshing to see :)
Yeah, I can relate to pretty much everything you said actually.
I've tried meditation, it's actually not bad! I did the free trial with the Headspace app! I might get the paid one, not sure, we'll see.
But yeah, all the methods you mentioned are great; exercise, routine + things to look forward to, socialising + alone-time, sleep a good amount.
Explore hobbies! Try something new. This opens opportunities for social interaction, fills some downtime, and ofc you might enjoy the activity itself!
When growing up we're taught to organise the boring parts of life (education, work, homework etc). We're not taught to organise something that we didn't think needed it, but as you get older you realise it does; fun! Don't forget to schedule something fun around your work.
Breathing exercises; breathe in for 4 counts, hold for 4, release over 4 etc.
Mindfulness exercises like focusing on sounds that you hear, or noticing the room around you, or examining how each of you body parts are feeling right now.
Therapy/counselling to talk and learn other techniques.
Advice from a nurse/doctor, maybe even discuss drugs to see if they help.
Loads of tips there, but I know too well what it's like suffering from anxiety and depression. Sometimes you make use of some of these tips and start to feel good, but then it doesn't take much to knock you down again. These ofc aren't a cure unfortunately, but so long as you try to get back up, it can be manageable.
Thank you so much for your comment, lots of really good points!! It's always helpful for people to talk about their experiences, share what works for them, etc, than pretend we've never felt anxiety and/or depression before. Thank you!!
Excellent Heart on the sleeve talk which will help many people ✌️
I can relate to this anxiety follows me around i kick its ass with cleaning and heavy metal! Panic attacks at work are bad too many people!
Great video Alanna! I loved the way you worked to identify your anxiety and then separate it from those other feelings (feeling like you had made a mistake or something). That's huge. And awesome! Great work! :)
Thank you so much for watching, really appreciate it!!!
Loving your video's ☺ I relate to you a lot. I know what it's like for someone to tell me that I'm just exaggerating and for them to say that they get anxious too - but it's not the same. They don't actually understand what it's like living with it so for them it's kind of a joke? It's easy for them to tell us to calm down or not to cry but for us it's so real and *overwhelming*. Hopefully if I am able to immigrate in the future and you're still living in England, I'd love to meet you! I'm not someone who likes routine, I work long hours so it's the same thing everyday. I don't really get to go out alone which I feel would help a little to be more independent? But I've had the opportunity (shopping alone) and I had a bit of an anxiety attack for being left alone and got it done faster than what I would if someone was with me. As for exercise, I feel like it would help but after a long day I can't bring myself to do it.
I also get these overwhelming times where I just need to cry and my chest feels heavy. Thank you for sharing this, I don't feel so alone after finding someone who is saying so many things I can relate to. Having someone say relax really does not 'relax' you 🙁
coping for me mostly is through venting to my friends or just having a nice chat with one close friend, but sometimes when these people aren't available, through no fault of their own, it can become really depressing thinking that there is no one there
13:00 "I need time to do nothing" YES that is essential to my daily life
I don’t claim, in a million years, to have a blanket cure for anxiety, that works for everyone; but for me, I had to acknowledge that anxiety is a natural part of the human condition. It exists if we like it, or not; and it is essential for survival.
For me, anxiety was only ever a problem if it had nothing “real” to “latch on to”; I would start to internalize the anxiety and there it could become pathological. A self-perpetuating fear-of-fear!
For me the solution was twofold.
1: exhaustive physical exercise took care of the hormonal symptomatology. (Using the excess adrenaline, if you will)
2: I now fly airplanes for a living, and while this is not particularly dangerous; it does provide me with a “vessel” to accommodate any anxious cognitions.
I truly believe that tiny doses of controlled danger can really help some people.
I wish you the best!
Healthy body, health mind. Being motivated and having a goal also helps a great deal. Feeling like you're in control of what's going on also puts you in a better state of mind and avoids getting all worked up over what can be, essentially, nothing. Having a routine allows you to feel like you're in control of what's going on in your life and also helps to take your mind off things, to some degree.
Anxiety is probably one of the worse things to experience, especially if it's something that catches you by surprise and you're in a situation where you feel you can't do anything about it. A lot of the time, you have to, 'sit it out', and try and work through it. But, it's great to be able to have certain strategies to combat the feelings that can so easily develop into what's colloquially described as a, 'panic attack.' I find that if I acknowledge and recognise what's going on, then I accept it and don't allow it to stop me doing whatever it is I'm doing. Like with any obstacle, you never stop, but instead find a way to work around it.
You are very brave for making this video.Well done you.Stay strong.
Superb video. I can really resonate with many of the things you bought up.
16:54 - P R E A C H I T !
Much of what you said about how you cope and deal resonates with my own experience, although exercise has never done anything for me (I have no idea what an endorphin rush feels like despite plenty of exercise both when young and bouts of using an exercise bike as an adult). Routine is a big help, and I really dig that need for accomplishment (happily I'd just finished hanging up a load of laundry when you talked about setting yourself the goal of doing the same).
When I first heard about mindfulness I was sceptical, but then realised I *already practices it in my own way*. If I feel that rising panic then concentrating only on immediate sensations in the moment can help a lot.
I know you feel crappy, I know you get these panic attacks, but really you're doing great overall (far better than I have in life). I guess keep on doin' what yer doin' :) .
Well, that's the little goal I set myself of having you like/comment on one of my comments on your videos fulfilled :). I hope you're having a great day too!
Love your videos and this one really resonates with me and my own issues with anxiety. I agree with everything you've said for coping with anxiety but one tip I have for a fairly mild attack is I have someone talk to me. About anything and everything EXCEPT how I'm feeling. So while they're chatting away about the latest celebrity break up or the weather, I do some deep breathing. The breathing and distraction of someone talking absolute bollocks to me really calms me down and I can carry on with my day. Thanks for sharing as mental health issues need to be talked about :) x
That's a really great point!! Thanks so much for watching, glad it could be of some help! :)
So much of what you talked about really hit home for me. Thanks so much for sharing!
Wow you've just described how I feel most of the time. I don't really have panic attacks that much but everything else yes and the way I like to cope is being alone and watching tv or UA-cam or just put some music on.
oh wow. I am in deep sadness watching this and thats because I am in that situation now cause I just came to England. thanks for sharing this... :)
Great video, I agree with all the techniques described here. One thing I have found useful for myself is Yoga. Yoga is very good for anxiety as it brings you 'into the moment' on a regular basis and, after doing it for some time, it allows you to recognise earlier when anxious feelings are beginning in your body and gives you a chance to separate them from your other emotions.
That's a great suggestion! I've just started meditation which focuses on bringing you into the moment as well, definitely has been helping me. Thanks for watching!
Dude, this sounds a lot like me, especially the night-time panic attacks. I used to get mad anxiety when I lived in Canada, away from my family. But now I take meds and cut down on caffiene to stop me feeling terrible. Yay.
I am the most relaxed person alive and nothing phases me. It’s like I’m very self contained and I can manage in all situations. I’ve been alone a lot in my life so I’ve had to have issue resources. But when my daughter was born she was very anxious from birth and I’d just sit with her and breath with her. That motion of getting our breaths in sync seemed to help her a lot. And fold look at her and try and convey calm confidence lol. Crazy but it worked for her..
I usually deal with anxiety by doing physical work such as washing dishes or sweeping the floor. Long walks outdoors
also help. You should get a fly swatter.
Definitely agree with hikes outside - one of my favourite things!
Great video, I reckon anxiety is closely related to stress--and todays society is so stressful--we are bombarded from all angles mostly by other peoples expectations. We live in a rat race which cynically pigeon holes us sometimes into roles unsuitable for our personalities--music helps me, so does helping others ( makes me feel useful and raises my self esteem), gardening etc you have to make a serious effort to try and be happy.
Big ups for making big moves in life with anxiety, bigger man than me! Preach on the self time 🤗 thanks for the vid 😇
What a wonderful way to put things, after I discovered I had a life changing medical health issue that I will never fully recover from I learnt a lot about dealing with life and being me, i live by a golden rule which I ask myself constantly when I have a problem or something I don't like or want to do "Can I do something about it" Yes or No ? Yes = Do it, No - Don't worry about it, there's nothing you can do to change the outcome. I also try to have fun and laugh every day. x
Love your honesty Alanna. Thank you for sharing your personal experiences and helping others to deal with theirs. I suffered with severe anxiety for 20 years, until I discovered something called The DARE Response by Barry McDonagh. The simple 'take away' message is that instead of running away from it, tell your anxiety to "BRING IT ON!" and watch it disappear as quickly as it arrived! I know it sounds crazy, but nothing else works as fast and prevents it from returning, because you learn not to fear the fear :) xx
Thank you so much, that's great advice!!
I couldn't believe it at first and was afraid I'd die from testing anxiety ... Turns out that the little voice in our heads doesn't like to stick around when we challenge it to do it's worst. It's like a paper tiger!
A very good video displaying a wisdom beyond your years. Music works for me personally. Drinking water is a good idea, too much coffee can heighten anxiety, so I have just one cup in the morning. By the way, Alanna, you work in a further education college (?). These can be very toxic places in which to work, and can heighten anxiety.
I would say I suffer low level anxiety. It's worst if I wake up in the early hours of the morning. I try to get back to sleep but stuff that has been worrying me but I have kept a lid on just surfaces. As soon as that happens I know I will not get back to sleep so I go downstairs and absorb myself in a PS4 game for an hour or 2 until I feel tired. Usually I can get another hour or two sleep before I have to get up for work. My daughter also suffers, probably worse than me, she uses Bach flower remedies, they seem to help her. Great video as always. Keep it up.
I absolutely agree with your PS4 idea - there's no reason to stay in bed anxious/upset, it'll just make you associate sleeping with anxiety! I love getting my mind absorbed into something as well, whether video game, really good book, etc. I hope your daughter is doing well, too :)
‘Humans you make me tired’ haha I can really relate to that. My coping mechanism is weed at the wkends, but I know that makes some people more anxious.
For me it totally clears all that crap out of my head, it’s like hitting the reset button.
sweat1across this is mine too :)
Have you discovered parkrun?
Anxiety is a nightmare on it's own. You hit a lot of good points in your bog. Lot of the things I do myself. Gym is not about bodybuilding it's to release the endorphins and pent up energy. Times it gets so bad I am like a coiled spring. Other times when it a 1 on your scale I can sit back and watch life pass me by. You are right when you said it's hard for some people to understand it. Lot of people have it but just don't know. I do the thumb on finger and listen to music and talk about it to friends. Heart out to you and I will be sharing this blog with Facebook. It's one of your best ones yet. :)
Cooking is one of my major points. I am a good cook from it. I hate panic attacks. Not going there.
Totally random comment here and maybe not the best video to post it on considering the subject matter (it happened while on this one though) but as I was listening to you, the video kept buffering and freezing and some of the frozen faces you (inadvertently) made were so cute.......That's British cute too btw.
Excellent video, I relate exactly, especially the alone recharging time.
I know this is an old video but loved it. All great advice, I use mostly the same methods to manage mine okay. Will never go away, but once you have the methods you feel it less and you can live your life. Anyway, thank you, it's nice to know it's not just me :-)
When I sleep too much I get really depressing dreams about things and people from the past which tends to make me pretty down and overall grim for the first part of the day. Just thought I'd share that as had that very experience a few days ago.
Honest, brave and refreshing, well done you...
Well said girl. Keep the vids coming. You are very cool and informative. Your the best😊
You're so kind, thank you for watching!!!
I have just been made redundant and have been suffering with anxiety for the last few weeks. I had not suffered with it for years. Thanks for this vid. What's embarrassing is I am 51.
It’s quite funny, I can relate to your symptoms in every way. The symptoms do subside over time. I find keeping busy is good and doing stuff to keep your mind occupied; I have quite a physical job so that helps. As you described, exercise is definitely one of the best things you can do for anxiety. Getting rid of the adrenaline boiling inside your body with a run or a cycle ride works. The workout must be intense. You must take time out to relax; get a good relaxation app for your phone and listen to it to eventually gain complete calmness, this will help when you reach those anxiety highs. Giving yourself tasks ie going out for the evening with friends, going away for the weekend etc is good way to overcome fears as when they’re completed you’ll feel good about it. Stay off the caffeine, it will only heighten the anxiety. Most importantly (for me), don’t drink too much alcohol, the hangover or even slightly hung over will make your chances of getting anxiety much higher; alcohol is a depressant. It might feel great when you’re doing it but the next day you’ll pay for it! Understanding of why you’re suffering with anxiety is important, unpick your life prior to your anxiety, then, take steps to reverse the effect that particular issue had on you, for instance, you may have been unhappy in your job etc. I had my first anxiety attack when I was 17 and got over it and spent many years anxiety free! It came back a little lately but I know it’s only a phase. Good luck with yours.
Thanks so much for your input!! It's comforting to know we're all dealing with the same thing :)
I don't know if this will help or not. Back in the 60s, I learned a two word phrase that has served me well. "Shit Happens" I know I can't change errors I have made. I know I have to deal with the consequences and I am aware I have to move on. What kept me motivated was being told, "O, you can't do that". My structure was the challenge of doing, often successfully, what I was told I could not do. I quickly learned to eliminate ALL nay-sayers from my life. Like you, I required someone to listen, non-critically, to my babble, but when they were not available, I began writing. Feelings on paper, now I use a laptop, made them more valid and far less intimidating. I rarely drink and I left my weed smoking back in the 60s and 70s. I have never taken medication other than painkillers or antibiotics. I have fears like everyone else, but anything short of "worst case scenario" I consider a win. There is, for me, no plan or purpose beyond what I choose to make. I used to have two plaques on my desk. 'Tanstaafl' (There ain't no such thing as a free lunch) and "illegitimi non carborundum" (Don't let the bastards grind you down) It works, but does give rise to cynicism.
I’m a saint, lol. Thank you for this video, I needed it 💕
My tips for people are:- Exercise, go running. Download the NHS C25K free mp3 podcasts for beginner runners. Cut out caffeine just drink decaf coffee and have less tea and sugar filled foods. Get a good nights sleep. Write down lists of things you need to do / get done instead of worrying and remembering. Don't take on more than you know you can complete, but make sure you complete what you start. Music or some quiet time alone away from TV, Internet and people may help. Google meditation and breathing techniques. If you ruminate allow only 1 day a week you can do this, and on the other days say no I have to wait until e.g. Friday's if I have these thoughts. If you are reading this hope it helps :) Nearly forgot.... listen to ASMR videos on youtube or twitch, try to have an open mind these may help greatly.
You have great taste in music :) Love your videos
i totally relate. I moved a. ver familiar place. a small town i was in for 15 years to a city and its overwhelming. Im used to seeing the same faces and places. Its very strange
I wish I had the wisdom to follow your plan for living when I was your age.
Alot and I mean alot of Anxiety is down to too much Booze