Forget Goal Setting → Do This Instead
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- Опубліковано 17 бер 2019
- We often focus on planning and setting goals for our lives. Whether for work, personal, or relationships, the goals we set and achieve set a course for how we live. Goals and the systems that power them are essential to life.
But what about our fears? How often do we allow ourselves to be limited or outright stopped by fears both realized and imagined? Stoicism offers an ancient lens for tackling modern problems.
According to the Stoic philosopher Seneca, the hard truth is that "we suffer more in imagination than in reality". What if there was a method of fear-setting to balance how we plan and set goals?
I've been doing this in my journals for years. But in April 2017 Tim Ferriss walked on the stage at TED and delivered a powerful talk on fear-setting and its role in his life. Watch it here: • Why you should define ...
In this video I'll take you through a short fear-setting exercise to use in your bullet journal. You can also talk yourself through each question and step, which I have done many times in the past.
But it will come as no surprise to you when I say writing down your fears and the expected outcomes will have a bigger impact than only thinking about it.
Download the fear-setting outline here: mattragland.com/fear-pdf
You can also copy what's on the video to your own bullet journal. If you're already on my email list the sheet will arrive with the next Monday newsletter.
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My name is Matt Ragland and I make videos about using a minimalist bullet journal to focus on what matters most to you. I’ll show you how to use concepts like 10 Blocks, Time Tracking Grids, and Project Timelines to quickly see what needs to be done and when.
You can look for these videos every week, so please hit subscribe to stay in the loop for each new show!
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Learn more about the 10 Blocks here: • A Minimalist Bullet Jo...
and Time Tracking here: • A Simple Time Tracker ...
Download all of my Bullet Journal productivity resources, including the 10 Block Method, Time Tracking Grids, and Monthly Plan at bulletjournalguy.com. You'll also be able to enter the 5 Day Time Track Challenge to see where your time is spent each day.
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The timing for this video was so crucial for me. I've had a rough year with a lot of mental struggles and a lot of illnesses and deaths in the family, and those factors ultimately began debilitating me to the point where it started affecting me as a medical student and my future as a doctor became uncertain. I became overwhelmed with fear and was always worrying about the worst case scenario about losing the chance to keep pursuing this dream of mine. My fears (both realistic and unrealistic) were making it hard for me to deal with things as they happened and think clearly about important decisions that needed to be made. I didn't know how to move forward some days.
I had a extremely important meeting today that was giving me a lot of anxiety, but I had watched this video twice beforehand (and for the third time after the fact) because it really clicked with me. I thought about your video and your story when I went into my meeting, and although so many things are still uncertain and there are many more fears that I have going forward, it's helped me be more calm by reminding me to be realistic and plan for every possible outcome going forward... And that not every outcome always has to be the worst case scenario. Yes, there's always the chance that the worst possible scenario can happen. It's happened to me before, and it may happen again. But I really appreciated how honest and humble you were in sharing the risk that you took, admitting it didn't go your way, but then telling us how you were able to overcome it and learn from it. You video made me feel less alone in my struggles because it grounded me and reminded me that we all struggle with these things in different ways. I'm so sorry you had to go through what you did, but I'm also so thankful that you shared your story with us and seemed so sincere in introducing us to this method so that we too can overcome our own fears.
I know his a long comment, but I just genuinely just wanted to say thank you for this video and for always being so genuine with your audience. Even though fear setting is something Tim Ferris came up with (and I watched his video as well as per your recommendation), I was able to relate to you a lot more. You can never tell when something you make or do can have a significant impact on someone, so I'm here to tell you that your video had an impact on me, and that I truly believe you deserve all the success and happiness going forward. Please remember that there are many others like me that appreciate all the work you put into your videos and always look forward to your uploads, even though we may not comment in every video. We're always cheering you on. :)
All the hearts I can give go to this comment ❤️
Sorry to hear about the hardships and anxiety - it's never easy to go through no matter how many videos you may watch or books you read. Still really hard when fear is pressing down. What I found (and it sounds like you are too) is how quickly I can now catch the fear and re-direct it, or simply recognize the fear is there and move on. Hopes and prayers to you on the same path. Thanks again for such a kind comment, means a lot to me 🤗
I simply wanted to say how much I appreciate reading your comment Akhi! It was SO sincere and so kind! It was a breath of fresh air to me! Thank you for your post! 🙂
By writing the outcome you're doing what Drucker calls "feedback analysis." You're a smart cookie sir
I've been watching your videos for almost 9 months (since I started my first bullet journal, and scoured UA-cam and Google for good suggestions and resources). I appreciate your practical ideas and suggestions tremendously. Thank you for all the content you create!
Thank you Adam! That means a lot to me, appreciate you saying so :D
Have you ever tried a practice like fear-setting before? Would love to hear what the process is like for you and what the outcome was! Let me know in the comments!
And yes - I know the beginning is blurry, I'm trying different things to fix it. But really I need a new camera that has better auto-focus. Saving up!
Have always done that mentally in my head but I see the advantages of writing it down and also including an outcome.
Found your channel by searching Tim Ferris’ fear setting talk. Really enjoy your content, thank you.
This was a really great video Matt! I have not done this but I think I will start. Great way to get it out of your head, work it through and even just seeing it visually on the paper would be helpful. Thank you for this great idea!
Happy to hear that Lynda, let me know what you think after testing :)
Fabulous as always. Great concepts to implement. As Yoda says, train yourself to let go of everything you fear to lose.
Thanks Judy - totally agree :)
Beautiful message
Really enjoyed this - such a good idea and I plan to put this into practice! Thank you so much for sharing!
Thanks Tammy!
Matt this was a great explanation of the technique.
Interesting, must give it a go. I find when I do this thing mentally I go to the worst case or best case scenario. This gives a more realistic base that would actually help, not just distract me
I've started doing something similar to this a few years ago! How cool! Back then I was overwhelmed with fears that appeared to be different fears coming together, I just couldn't get my mind to relax, the same thoughts just kept repeating themselves! But now I use it for other emotions as well (often worst c.s. will be replaced by why? why? why?) Something I do as well in combination with this is a bit of a different aspect. First I name it, in this case the fear, then I close my eyes and let this emotion wash over me without witholding anything, every single cell of my body feels the fear. This stops postponing emotions that give me the impression they last long whereas I simply need to sit down to deal with them. I gave it the attention and space it asked for and most likely deserved as well, now I can analyse the worst case scenario, plan how I'd handle the wordt case scenario and after this the fear is nearly gone. I do this with overwhelming emotions and emotions that repetitively ask for my attention, like fear but also anger, disappointment, sadness, jealousy, ... especially emotions I don't like to see in myself and therefore have fewer coping skills on! I used to ignore them. By questioning myself which emotion I feel, I help my mind get more constructive on why I feel what I feel and how I can tackle it! I've never shared this with anyone but this seems the place for it :) It's been 3 years now and I'm so grateful now for how calmly I handle many things in life. Hope some can add this to their mental journey!
Thank you for sharing this video. Thank you for sharing from your real life. The visual word story/picture is very helpful to me as a visual learner. I appreciate the detail. I appreciate you. I appreciate your reaching and sharing.
Glad to hear it Abbie :)
Great idea. I will definitely give it a try. Anxiety and fear go hand in hand. Thank you 🙏🏻
Absolutely agree they work together!
Matt, Id never heard of “fear setting, it might be a great way for me to process through some challenges, thank you!
Awesome, let me know how it goes Chris!
Thank you so much for sharing your tips.
You’re welcome 😊
Thanks Matt
It's quote a profound concept. As you talked it through in the video, you appear to be moving towards the SWOT analysis ( Strengths, Weaknesses, Opportunities, Threats) so beloved of management training.
Thanks for sharing this helpful video!!
Thanks for watching Hannah!
You have a very pleasant speaking voice and good clear messages. Thank you for all your work!
Thanks Jane :)
This was a very helpful video Matt, thank you for sharing.
Glad you liked it!
@@MattRagland Thank you, I need to try that.
Thank you for sharing this information. I am a dyed-in-the-wool agoraphobe and you just gave me the key to attacking my irrational fear based mind.
Love it, stay on the attack Jolynn!
Just found this video. Did you do any video on Journaling, how you set up your journal etc. Would love a vid on that as a tool for self-improvement.
Thanks for sharing, Matt. I like the one page template: I find it handy
Just curious: How do you know what to put in the "Likely" section, especially for actions you haven't taken before? What are your reference points for what is likely or not?
Thanks again
Could you do a video on using a Gantt chart in your bullet journal for productivity planning?
I am enjoying your videos. Your content is wonderful and I have been able to make much progress with your tips and tricks. Please try to fix your focus issues when videoing your face though. It makes it really difficult to watch when you are speaking to camera.
Thanks for the kind words, and yes working to fix the focus issue. All the clips after the first one are much better!
Hi Great video as usual. I have a question that is not related to this video, but I would like to know what kind of pen you use for the thicker titles. Thanks.
It's the Pigma Micron 1 - very solid
@@MattRagland Thanks. Take care. Cheers.
Random question: Why do you organize your book by color? Aesthetic or as way to find them because you remember the color of book you think of? Something else?
Nice bra thanks!
Glad you liked it!
Nice video Matt
FEAR (False Evidence Appearing Real)
Great exercise to gain perspective how how fear holds us back.
Also, I think you should do a subscription service, I would happily pay $10/monthly for helpful weekly content like this.
Hey Dan, thanks so much for saying so! Are you on my email list? I'm starting there first :)
Matt Ragland , I am Matt.
Thanks for asking.
Fantasized
Experiences
Appearing
Real
Is the one I’ve heard before.
I am on your emailing list but have not received your emails weekly, I check my spam folder also, at present in counselling as have always lived in fear, start with trauma at the age3, 50+ years at last trying to break the control it has had
Can you email me matt AT mattragland.com? Will check this out :)
I have emailed you, kind regards Diane
The out of focus shot was really off-putting :( great video though!
Sorry about that - working on making it clearer and more consistent
This fruit keeps a diary LOL I bet he cries every day of his life and has a once a month period