Perfect Memory = Perfect Inability to Forgive | House M.D.
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- Опубліковано 11 лют 2025
- Never forgetting anything can be a curse. A waitress with perfect recall starts suffering from paralysis and things are further complicated by her long-held grudge against her sister.
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From Season 7 Episode 12 ''You Must Remember This'': A waitress with an extraordinary memory (guest star Tina Holmes) suffers a paralysis, and her recovery is complicated by an anything-but-forgotten grudge she holds against her older sister (guest star Claire Rankin). Meanwhile, House (Hugh Laurie) discovers Wilson's (Robert Sean Leonard) secret new companion when he tries to help him return to the dating scene; and Foreman (Omar Epps) helps Taub (Peter Jacobson) prepare for a medical exam.
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Chase giving the ecstatic thumbs up from behind the glass while the patient is having a heart attack is hilarious.
He is the successor.
When you have perfect memory, you can see how much people lie regularly...
I stranger is how people change their memories then believe the new version. I don't have a perfect memory, but sometimes just sometimes I do!
It's not that fun
It's not just lying but our memories change with time. If this person would ask the sister about a certain memory, she wouldn't be lying if she got something wrong, but the memory reshaped into a similar one
It is not often I completely dislike carachters, but this acress did a truly fine job of creating an insufferable, obnoxious carachter that I truly disliked and pretty much loathed.
@@65MaX73 yes. I remember something and then I see the old photos from the event and suddenly see I was mistaken with my own memory. Our brains are tricky. How can I lie if this is what I truly remember... That's why I never fully trust my memory unless I have something written or documented otherwise the time it was happening. :) (it is mostly about long ago things not recent ones)
"But if you want to be special, you're gonna have to be alone"
Very House attitude.
❤❤❤😊
I think the most unrealistic thing about this is she has a perfect memory and worksat a dinner living pay check to pay check
In the end, it wasn't her perfect memory that was the problem. It was her obsession with every minor slight and her inability to accept other people's imperfect memories.
“Minor” slights? Getting run over by a car, etc is a minor slight? 💀
I feel like if all you’ve ever experienced is remembering everything, it would be really hard to grasp what forgetting so much is like. Or worse, how memories change over time. You’d sort of automatically feel like others didn’t care or were dishonest, even if you knew logically they weren’t.
Wrong, the last item in your list.
That's a side effect of superior memory. You try being able to remember better than the people around you.
👍💔
When you have perfect memory you’d also remember ALL of YOUR f___ups.
You’d also be a perfect liar because your story would never change and you’d remember all the invented details to support your lies.
It's a nightmare honestly I have that.
@@SteveRush-qi3gr every superpower has a drawback…
Everything have a price in this life huh
True.
Why I don't practice deception. I remember how it feels to be lied to.
Not only that, but all of your trauma, I have a whole bunch of fucked up memories and I don't even remember everything, if I remembered every little fucked up thing that happened to me that would be torture.
I guess they took, "We don't forgive, we don't forget" too literally.
you knew I was getting the mail and didn't check and hit me with your car🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
never forgetti momma's spaghetti
expecto patronum
It’s very hard to do when you have a perfect or near perfect memory.
A memory like that is not a gift, it’s a curse.
You learn how to just stay away from people that hurt you just for their pleasure.
I haven’t seen or bothered to talk to my own mother and brother for well over 20 years.
I have three out of four kids I do t even bother to care about for their antics.
Kinda hard to talk about unconditional love when there is baggage like that.
I know EXACTLY how she feels.
Oh so true
So, perfect memory means that she would remember the good things, too. That means she is fixated on the bad ones more.
Additionally, it is not solely her memory's fault that she has trouble interacting with people. In the scene in the diner, it is obvious that that woman wants her to move along and stop saying she had visited before.
The waitress can remember everything but can not remember social cues until an argument has started?
Edit:
I am aware that most people more readily recall bad memories. I did not say that was unusual. What is unusual and to her advantage is that she can perfectly recall good memories too.
If I give you a cookie every day but slap you twice in 100 days, you’ll likely remember the slaps more than all the cookies. Survival is programmed to focus on negatives.
Autism lol
@@chucksolutions4579 chocolate chip AGAIN?!
Her logic was all about "You need to make things up to me enough that I personally believe I can forgive you." She kept a personal scoreboard of every fault that ever happened and every good thing that happened.
@@emilynightray I say it’s worse than that. You just CANT make up for the mean things you do to people, unless you get to save their life, you can’t just be nice enough or do enough favors to make people like you more (unfortunately I’ve tried). It really takes the person you have wronged to be in a terrible situation and you being the only person that could help them to restore a positive relationship and often even then it’s not enough (again, been there in combat situations, acknowledge the save but if people don’t like you…🤷♂️).
I think this is where either understanding Jesus and the cross comes into play to save from sin, or not, and how that allows forgiveness to grow through it no longer being about the person who wronged you.
I developed a bad memory to forget a lot of abuse from my family. I forgot instead of forgiving for a long time. In my 40’s I still struggle to forgive bc it’s just easier to forget about it and not bring it up but it fosters unconscious resentment.
progressively stopping to resent someone because the memory of what they did to you is progressively becoming more distant and cloudy is not forgiveness... it's called forgetting.
forgiveness is when you know and understand what someone did to you and stopped caring as much about it. often it happens because you value other things more than what was taken from you in that event. for example you value your friendship or family bond more and ultimately decide to forgive. it's also a form of forgiveness when you value your own peace of mind above it, refusing to let the other person live rent-free in your head.
her great memory being an expression of ocd perfectly fit this. it is not that she can't forgive because she remember all the bad things, but she's remembering all things because she's neurologically obsessed by them. in short, she don't forget because she's unable to forgive.
Noone remembers what someone else has done to them. They remember bits and pieces.
Most people are functional with others mostly because they forget and not forgive 90% of what they have done to them.
@@dimitriostrigkakis2052 true. still not forgiveness as you've said yourself. that's why we forget things, because it's hard to forgive. gotta have just the right balance where you remember things enough to not let them happen to you again and forget just enough so that you can remain functional.
@@dimitriostrigkakis2052 Most people are barely even sapient. Neurotypicals barely qualify as human.
I wonder how that ties into cptsd, getting hit by a car on purpose seems pretty messed up 😭 (tho I think the sister genuinely said it was an accident)
Unless you have proof testing all the humans on earth, I’d refrain from making such a definitive statement of ‘no-one’. In fact, there have been exceptional cases of humans with photographic memories who truly remember everything done to them.
Similar issue... The stronger the memory, the stronger the emotions tied to it; the more plentiful and vivid the details, the more years you remember, the harder it is to not think about every day. Many compounding factors. I'm glad most of you don't have memory like that. It turns the past into a black hole.
Spending the future replaying memories of the past sounds like a snake biting its tail.
I’m sorry you go through that. Having DID means that all of our memories are neatly compartmentalized into separate people’s minds so that we don’t have to all deal with them all at once all the time. I wonder whether leaning to dissociate (if it’s a skill that can be learned; I’m not sure) could help. I don’t think you need to make alters (or even could), but dissociation doesn’t require alters.
When you keep going over and over a memory, you're not actually recalling the event itself, but your most recent memory of it, colored by whatever emotions it evokes. So memories become distorted over time, and what you "remember" is how you now feel about that event overlaid onto the event.
Unfortunately, its my curse, i have the ability 😢
I have something similar to that i don't forget the whole details and short details either. I still have good memories from the past when I was in kindergarten all through high school years and early 20s in my young adult years. Now I'm 34 years old and I still have those memories, especially the very bad ones and sad ones, unfortunately. No wonder I'm now in a bad mood, awkward a little for the so-called normal society, still in my old world, and having headaches 😒.
@@haparcheledupwarI feel you 😪 😢😒.
Love that Chase grin and thumps up "thanks bro!" lol
Perfect memory is called hyperthymesia - extremely rare. As of January 2024, only 33 cases have been confirmed.
IM ONE OF THEM UNFORTUNATELY OR MAYBE NOT
@melaningoddess5179 It's definitely a double-edged sword. I hope you achieve a lot of great things.
@@dangerpowers4582 GRATITUDE 🙌🏾 I'M ACTUALLY IN THE NAVY STATIONED IN JAPAN RIGHT NOW!! IT ENDED UP WORKING IN MY FAVOR!!
@melaningoddess5179 lol I don't believe you. I'm a 7'8 black British man with 13 inch ding dong and it's 6 inches wide, and I have 30$ billion dollars to my name because I'm a Chinese real-estate tycoon!
Anyone else know that memory is subjective. They're all from her perspective. So yeah. They can be perfect, but only from her perspective.
Bro what?
Exactly. What she remembers of a past experience, and what her sister remembers of it, may differ quite a lot. Whose memory is "real"?
@@gingerbuttonwood2364You can remember facts = things that are observable with your senses, and feelings separately. Most people just remember their opinions about what happened, but some of us can go back into those memories(consistent of facts that happened and the feelings that we had) and analyze them again with the newly found information. So there's facts and then there's opinions of what happened. Some of us don't store opinions as memories, so I'd say whoever remembers things that happened and doesn't put meanings/claim to know why someone did something, is more right.
Also there are many research right now that shows that memory isn't actually something that comes out straight out of the past.
It actually gets recreated everytime you try to remember it.
I wonder what's the effect on people with photographic memory because of it.
Yeah this is stupid. This crazy relativism to pretend that people with exceptional memory don't really exist is beyond dumb. If a person can remember what happened during 30-40-50 random dates thrown at them, their memory is exceptional, no matter how much you would like them to not be better than you at that game
Perfect memory is a double-edged sword.
Marilu Henner has an eidetic memory.
A memory that good, you can be literally anything. Doctor, Lawyer, Professor, etc.
College exams would be a breeze for all the memorization subjects. Maybe math would still be hard but you'd still have the advantage of remembering all the math problems you'd seen before..
It does not work that way, atleast this condition doesn't. Studies have shown that it is a selective ability, and they can have comparative difficulty with rote memorization and therefore cannot apply their ability to school and work.
Remember, the condition is called highly superior *autobiographical* memory, so if you told a hyperthymesiac a fact about the world, they may not remember what you said, but they will be more likely to remember what you wore and other details of the situation when you told them and the emotions they felt during an event are often recalled along with the details. This is all from Wikipedia
@@asiamies9153 I once ran into someone on Twitter claiming they have very good memory to the extent of being able to remember a whole book, word for word, and wouldn't forget anything even months later. He said he's now a lawyer. I was sceptical about it because with such a claim it means he should have been able to get 100% in most of his university modules since law is a field that requires memorisation more than formulation.
Not true unfortunately... :(
And thus the mislabeling people with a great memory as "smart." They may be, or not be. But two distinct skills.
As someone with a steel trap for a memory, I will say that having such a good memory does make it VERY hard to forgive people. You look at them, and you're flooded with memories of them hurting you. I don't have a positive relationship with one of my older brothers because it's so bad that his very presence stresses me out and puts me on edge, and that lasts long after he leaves.
I find forgiving because I care more about myself helps a lot even if I remember a lot of details about someone.
Her problem is not that she cant forget, its that she cant forgive. Two very different things
Exactly. I had a similar problem before ssri treatment. It turns out you don't need to know how many cracks are in the sidewalk between humanities and biology class.
@@Michelle32218 I have no desire to be 'cured'. Like the character, I have nothing else going for me.
@@Michelle32218 i guess you also dont need to know what the pills that you take do to you. ignorance is bliss, am i right?
Actually they connect. Those who "truly forgive" basically choose to forget the instance that caused the issue/problem. If you have "photographic memory", you will ALWAYS remember it and not truly forgive you. The saying goes..."forgive and forget". If you can not forget, you will tend to remember that "bad" feeling.
@@RedJoker9000 I can't say whether you're right or wrong, but I'm curious about how emotional regulation would play into one's ability to forgive.
@2:47 chase expression 😂
Literally just checked the comments to see if anyone else timestamped this moment, I lol'd
😁👍
ikk XD
Priceless XD
😃👍
I remember a lot of things in great details. It is true that good memory makes it extremely hard to forgive people who have injured you, but it also makes it quite easy to learn from past mistakes so that you’ll never get hurt by the same mistake again. Overall I believe that having a good memory does more good than harm, if we choose to remember the lessons and let the individuals fade over time.
I agree. I, too, have a really great memory. I can remember the exact page and the location on what page of the information I had read. I have stopped talking to my paternal side of the family for the last 7 years. People might say I hold a grudge but i disagree. I am not actively hating anyone. Honestly, they barely cross my thoughts. Having that said, I always learn my lessons once. I once told my husband that I cannot help but trust only once and never again. It's as if betrayal ultimately changes how I see the other person, myself, and our whole relationship. I might be civil but I would always catch myself, almost subconsciously, everytime I become vulnerable.
Agreed
You don't seem to understand the point.
"A lot of things" vs "Every single thing in perfect details". You can only ride your moral high horse, cause you don't understand how mental disorders work.
Well said.
I think of not being able to forget as a layer of protection.
It can definitely serve as a reminder.
@@advaitthavare no, you missed it. Sometimes, you have to consider the outlier. I have a very good memory, most people don't. So they need to consider which they are hurting and won't find easy forgiveness and acceptance so easily.
Forgiveness is an accounting term referring to no longer chasing after someone for restitution.
Writing off someone else as a bad debt counts as forgiveness.
Then you're free to take care of the damage they caused instead of wasting more time trying to get them to make you whole again.
Just don't extend those thieves any further credit.
Hope this helps someone else
Hey, thanks, it was helpful.
Excellent !
Forgiveness is what you do to people you can't get away with dismembering.
Yep I do that too but I call it acceptance. forgiveness is too much like saying what happened me was ok and it wasn’t! What was done to me was wrong and I accept your never gonna try to make it right even if you could. However I’m not gonna dwell on this and let it destroy me I’m gonna go forward and live well.
If I held onto every bad thing my siblings have done to me, I’d never talk to any of them again. Same for them with me.
Chase looks so pleased when he got Masters to upset their patient lmao
I have perfect recollection not as pronounced as in the patient in the story, but enough for it to be a burden, yes, it helps with studying and my academic career. Constantly remembering traumas and your own blunders 30 years ago is not fun at all. And as year pass the burden just get heavier. Your every mistake, your every failure is with you forever. Being able to forget is a bliss.
Studies have shown that it is a selective ability, and they can have comparative difficulty with rote memorization and therefore cannot apply their ability to school and work.
@@asiamies9153 Well I speak 3 languages and work in advanced biomedical research field. I agree it is selective, I don’t remember numbers for instance. I suppose it’s not only perfect recollection and instant recollection that I have, but other factors as well and I do need to study it’s just generally much easier for me. Still the point of remembering traumas and blunders remains. Good memory did not make me a happy person.
Every single time in Dr House
patient: What does it mean?
Them: That we still don't know what's wrong with you.
Oh hey, thats where that chase gif is from.
Ty for this really thought provoking clip in general, but i definitely appreciate the length of it, allowing enough if the story to play out!!!
OF not IF 😎
I think people are misunderstanding her memory issue. It's not that she's incapable of forgiveness, or even that she's holding on to memories the way we understand memories (recalling something that has happened), but she seems to be *living* the moment. So when she "remembers" her sister running her over, she's experiencing all the strong emotions again: the shock, the confusion, the pain, the resentment that followed. If you got run over are you going to forgive someone WHILE they're running you over? Because that's essentially what is being asked of her. It also seems like she can't exactly control what "memories" pop up, but maybe the ones with the strongest emotions tied are popping up
I honestly think it would take superhuman strength or some kind of medication that dampens her emotions to make her capable of forgiveness. Sometimes when I remember what people have done negatively to me, I get a little wave of annoyance and anger still. I can't imagine getting emotions that are AT THE SAME LEVEL as when the event *first* happened
my emotions are always to one level or another, humans sure are something,
Good memory in general, not even perfect memory, is not a good thing. When bad things happen its very easy to go from one thing to the next to the next and so on. The good memories only really last until the next thing comes up to take the minds attention. As humans we can spend a lot of time in the negative areas of our mind. Substance abuse to try and either distract the mind or force it to forget the things we dont like is fairly easy to fall victim to.
This can also be nade worse by the fact that good memory alone isnt what everyone wants. They want to have a good internal clock to call back on things that the memory would help with in a timely manner. They want to have the ability to comprehend concepts that would allow them fully utilize the good memory beyond simple things.
Memory is but one piece to the mental abilities that make up our minds and only being able to have good memory does not allow us make up for other shortcomings of being a human.
Benzos, alcohol, opiates. The first two can make you forget, the last one makes you not care.
Memory is just part of how we think & what we are.
But without the disorder that compels her to recall bad memories-rather than have it there is retrieve, & makes her deeply OCD...
A good or perfect memory need not be at all negative.
Because we would have a choice whether to focus on anything!
Also unlike her we can reprogram how we feel about it; including desensitizing & forgiving.
This astonishing memory absent being a slave to it & unable to recondition our initial feelings would be a potential assest!
Disagree.. memory is extremely selective. If you remember everything that you have ever laid your eyes upon, the result would actually be not remembering anything, because you would overload your brain every hour by the most meaningless things. In reality, you select what you want to remember. Forgetful people arent stupid, they just can not focus and select certain things to memorize.
Having a good memory (unless you have some sort of ocd) does not in turn make you remember everyone else’s fallacies and how they wronged you. It is your compulsion to filter and select those memories that make you memorize them.
In conclusion: you have basically selected the negative points about others to memorize, and you can train yourself to change that.
@disguisedcat1750 what is this comment in response to? I made no such mention of memories of others. I have not implied that memory wasn't selective. I stated things about human nature that are observable and why having a better memory will negatively impact them and potentially have very little or no benefit.
What I can also include is that constantly checking your filter so that you can live without selecting the bad memories can itself be very draining mentally, especially to those who non social people in social situations who are already straining themselves mentally.
@SilverSkitterscuttle the problem with your line of thinking is that choosing what you wish to remember and what you ignore is a choice that must be made actively in a lot of scenarios.
This can be very exhausting mentally and can be very hard to overcome during times of duress. I do agree that most of the time it can be overcome but the potential shortcomings should not be dismissed. It would be a long term struggle to overcome as reprogramming our thought is very hard to do.
I'm autistic, and have OCD. I also have anxiety, so my memory is surprisingly strong - I'm a walking GPS, and my first memory is from when i was about 18 months old, maybe slightly younger.
A few years ago, my dad told me he didn't think I was built for relationships. That he thinks I prefer to be alone. And considering I was in my mid 20s with no sign of having one anytime soon, I believed him.
Nearly 29 and about to celebrate two years with the person I'll marry one day. It's the healthiest, most loving relationship of anyone I know. People have actually told me they're jealous of us!
Never tell someone "other" that they have to medicate or be alone. That isn't hoe the world works. And I _hate_ that this is the message House MD ended on.
I am happy for you but there's always a trade off. You are special (I mean it in a good way), but the more special you are, the less people would be a good enough match to you.
Say one has a persistent odor from their mouth, that can be reduced by right meds. Should they take those so more potential partners would tolerate them? Or should they remain more distinct than the others? Even if they'd refuse treatment, they still might find someone, but less people would be available. Statistically, that's how the world is, and it's quite unfair.
And I don't mean to compare your situation to this imaginary one, it's just a sound example. You may swap it to other diseases, personality quirks or to just simply being different. I think it's a bitter message, but life also is not all sweets.
@@IvanIvanov-ej2wy Having bad breath is something that obviously needs to be dealt with. Having a physical ailment of any kind obviously needs to be dealt with.
But just being wired differently? Just seeing the world in a different way from other people? Why should that ostracise you? I know _plenty_ of neurodiverse people with higher needs than me who are happily married with kids. And others who have long-term partners. Just because we're not easy in every situation, or come with an extra complication, doesn't mean we should be told to expect to be alone unless we're medicated to conform with society.
There are 7 billion people on this planet. And a significant portion of them don't care, or would actually help their partner with coping mechanisms. Not everyone dismisses people who are "other" just because it's more difficult.
@@LilyGrace95 I don't see how that contradicts my statement. Still plenty of partners, but less than without being on a spectrum. You just restated it more wordly, I think. In no way I insist anyone feel ostracised, I don't know where you picked up that idea
Also, adults with Asperger's sometimes feel surprised on receiving the diagnosis because they've learnt (instead of having those naturally) social skills during adolescence and became more conformed having less problems in day to day life.
@@IvanIvanov-ej2wy Asperger's is an outdated and eugenics-based term. Please don't use it x
And I'm in that category, wasn't diagnosed until my 20s. Yes, you've subconsciously learnt skills from spending your life trying to fit in, so you're better at hiding as an adult. But learning that the whole time you didn't have to, it does one hell of a number on you mentally and you start to question every interaction you have.
And you likened being ND to having a physical ailment, saying they both need to be dealt with to fit in. What I'm saying is, that isn't true. There are _millions_ of people out there who are perfectly accepting. Unless it's severely hindering your health, I don't see why ND people should be forced to make a choice between medicine or exclusion.
I am glad for you and I thought the same way about this character's writing for this episode. Do you mind me asking how you met your partner?
She would have learned long ago not to snitch on customers. "Oh you were here before with some other guy!" Lol good writing as usual 😩
Exactly. Especially how the woman acted. If she didn't care, then it would have been a fun thing. Wow cool, you remember i wanted teriyaki chicken 2 years ago. When she so adamantly shuts the conversation down, the Waitress should've picked up on it.
By shut down do you mean by belittling and insulting the waitress Than claim she's money-grubbing for tips
Literally had nothing to do with the plot, just introducing the uniqueness of the character. Y’all are dumb
@@EnglishInfidel Uh-huh
And you dolts don't know how OCD works. The video literally showed how the OCD was diagnosed and how it worked, yet you are too stupid to understand that LOL
2:47 new meme format
I find a lot of this Episode clip very fascinating, but, I just gotta say everything aside, I give props to the casting director or whoever chose these 2 specific actresses! They were really believable and great! 😎😇🤗
There's a difference between forgiving and forgetting. Forgiving comes from the heart. Not so easy when you're keeping track of all the bad stuff, but still.
Her problem is she has little EQ. She has all the information formation and yet can’t read the situation at all. She recognizes the person but can’t tell she’s cheated and can’t tell by the that the person is uncomfortable.
It's always hard to get along with people when you can't forget all that bad stuff. Like when you run into someone from school and they're being all friendly and asking how I've been doing... meanwhile I'm over here reliving the time we almost killed each other in a bloody, violent brawl in the lunch room because they stole my jello pudding and trying to figure out if there's any possibility I could get away with biting all their fingers off like I was going to do before the teachers broke it up.
Oh this is me, I have perfect recall of everything since I was 6.
It's great for exams and tests.
I can learn incredibly quickly, read a text book know it all in one go.
Except you can never forget anything especially all the cringe stuff in my life.
That's horrible. I'm so sorry
@@leafyishereisdumbnameakath4259 It isn't, you just dump the toxic people in your life very quickly rather than let them hang around. The positives far outweigh the negatives.
The cringe just as you're ready to sleep. 😢😂
This condition does not really help with rote memorization
My memory isn’t nearly that good, but oftentimes I find myself talking about things that my friends and family have forgotten entirely about. Memories from when I was 2 or 3 or 5 or 6 or whatever. I just tend to remember events I attached strong emotions to, which was basically any time someone treated me halfway decently or incredibly poorly.
Must be nice to remember everyone else’s missteps. Certainly makes her feel like a victim.
Oh God I feel her. I remember too much and the things that I remember the most are all bad things. It has made me hate the people that care about me most in the world. I can't say it's severe enough to become a disease or make me "special" but it's something I can't seem to get rid of. It's easier to forgive when you can forget
She can’t forgive. You wont really forget a memory that has impacted you on emotional level.. that is why forgiveness is about not forgetting the memory.. it’s about “forgetting”(more like cutting or detaching) the deep emotional triggers associated with that certain memory.
That’s why when feeling of anger is gone, you are on your way to forgiveness…
I would NOT want to have a perfect memory...
be glad your memory does not work that way then because you do not have that issue🤣🤣🤣
It's common for people with perfect memories to get PTSD especially so if their life isn't all sunshine. Having a liking of puzzles and putting paper cups a certain way does not satisfy the diagnosis of OCD. What is causing her issues is complex PTSD from multiple occasions of bad memories that's more vivid (remembering others' sadness, getting stung by daisies 6 times, and getting a broken bone from a car crash, estranged relationship with her sister for 6 years).
The show said she suffered from McCleod's Syndrome, a neurological condition that includes cognitive impairment as symptoms. Her insistence in putting cups the same way and never leaving a puzzle undone can be as mild as just being inflexible. If you insist on giving that a medical name, it could be a cognitive inflexibility on tasks that might hinder task switching, in short, cognitive impairment.
With that superhuman memory though, she is clearly neurodivergent. PTSD that alters the way the brain perceive the world, qualifies as a neurodivergent condition too. And that's almost everything you can infer based on the portrayal.
7:18 The facial expression on House as he is turning the cup is priceless.
“Remember me?.. just kidding” Ahhh Dr House 😂
I don't have an eidetic memory, but I have a much better one than most peoples. It absolutely affects my tendency to hold grudges. I lose trust in people from singular or clusters of events and I remember them the rest of my life, even if the relationship improves later. Most people I've known more than a few years I have some reason not to trust them that they absolutely do not remember but it sticks with me every time I have the option to trust them with something. It's more compulsive than emotional, I try to work on it to a small degree.
I'm with you bestie. It has affected my life so much...
Wow can't imagine how hard it is to live with. How do both of you cope?
I have an incredibly good memory also, but I don't struggle with forgiveness.
"I don't have (...) a small degree."
Same here. Well, I don't know whether or not I have eidetic or perfect memory. But at least I'm sure it's unusually good.
It's gotten to the point that I'd rather be around strangers than aquintances. Strangers are those who haven't insulted me or let me down (yet). Situations involving aquintances, esp. my closest family members keep playing in my head; often with vivid memories of what happened, including how they looked and their tone of voice. I think I remember most things worth remembering that's happend to me since I was 9, 35 years ago. Most notably negative memories like being criticised, hurt, injured, insulted, taken for granted or questioned my sincerity.
And I keep pondering things like "what did (s)he really mean when (s)he (didn't) say or do X instead of Y?" and "why did I (not) react this way or that way?". Sometimes I can see myself as well, although usually from the back and in low resolution black-and-white pictures. At times I feel as though I'm not treated as an actual, independent, adult person but as a mascot, measure of last resort, spittoon, wailing wall or punching bag.
Similar to Hobbes in the cartoon "Calvin and Hobbes", coming to life only in Calvin's mind and when no-one but Calvin and Hobbes is present. With the difference that at least Calvin think that Hobbes is a real tiger. I'm not sure if anyone sees me as a real human being.
I don't imagine that anyone can convince me that this is normal, healthy and not a symptom of something being out of whack.
I have what has been described as a “freakishly good memory.” It is not perfect. I am so incredibly thankful that it is not perfect. “Freakishly good” makes it very difficult to spend time with family and others I have known for a long time. Everyone does stuff which is mean once in a while. I have a hard time even talking to my brother and sister.
thats crazy to me. she is essentially the opposite of me because i have dissociative amnesia and almost never remember anything
Right on time for lunch. I could set my watch by it... If watches actually needed to be set nowadays.
Every one I've ever had needed to be set, including the one I'm wearing now. The only clock I have that doesn't need to be set is my computer.
if you can't forgive because you still remember you fucking missed the entire point of forgiveness
That's not how this works. You're allowed to forgive or not. Why? Because something bad happened to you. It is a decision where we learn fight, fight or freeze. If you know your classmates from school bullied you every day, once you see them again your body will tell you "these people used to hurt me..." yes, you may have forgiven them, but your body does not forget. Which in turn, you don't forget. It is a safety mechanism that we actually need.
Bro acts like solved abuse 😂
@@Gumgumdropbuttns are you stupid I obviously said forgetting is not the point of forgiveness
Easy coming from someone that can’t perfectly recall how someone wronged you.
@@pathetic2399 look at your fucking username bro you're clowning yourself
If you want be special you have to be alone 🤔 very well said doctor 👏
Its tough to control. The bad haunts you. You cant delete anything. You just stuff ur mind with more memories.
My mom has amazing memory... But she's very forgiving, and she can change the narrative on absolutely anything 😂. Guess that's what keeps her calm and happy. My memory is nowhere as good, and I'm not nearly as forgiving 😂. Yup, keeps me bitter, also keeps me away from a lot of toxic people, unlike my mom. At least until her cancer last year, and she finally agreed to go low contact with her family (given their behavior) ❤
Just because your memory is perfect doesn't mean you need to be a jackhole. That's a personality defect. For every bad memory, there should be good ones as well. It's up to you which ones mean more.
"For every bad memory, there should be good ones as well."
We experience pain and boredom more frequently than pleasure and excitement. It stands to reason that someone with a flawless memory would probably be at least slightly jaded.
But what you say isn't so. I have thousands more bad memories than good, as that's how my life went. I was bullied throughout school. I have Asperger's. I realized everyone else was different when I was in 3rd grade. I never lie, so a lot of people are offended by the truth. And because no one has ever cared about me, I don't care about anyone else. Luckily perhaps, most the people who have hurt me the most have died, some badly, as in drowning, car wrecks, disease, etc. And I didn't shed a single tear. I was glad they were gone. Perhaps you had a more perfect life than I did.
My memory is garbage and I have aphantasia. I had OCD tendencies before I got on my meds. Now that I'm all somewhat balanced out, i figured out my memory lapses in high emotion situations. Can't lie, I'm a little jealous of a fictional character. XD
i relate to you a LOT
"Everybody dies alone"
Also a line from Firefly.
Convergence of good shows.
When you forgive you don’t forget the messed up thing someone said or did to you. You process the emotion and move past it. If all you did was forget then you’d get pissed off every time something reminds you of the thing that happen. Process and acceptance is the only way to forgive.
This whole thing is about why we all have to find a reason to forgive people. No matter what may or may not be angry, we have to forgive. Forgiveness is to release your anger, and it is very important. All the bottled up anger can kill you on the inside.
I know only 1 thing for certain about forgiveness. Not everything or everyone can be forgiven on a personal level.
"Everybody lies." -this weird Sherlock Holmes kind of doctor. Can't remember his name but I'm sure he'd love this chick.
The waitress is badass. Never condone the acts of cheaters.
Memory is involuntary. Forgivness is a concious choice. Understanding people can and will hurt you, accidentally or maliciously, is wisdom. Maintaining a relationship despite that is courageous. It'd be one thing for the character to cut her sister out of her life because she was abusive, but cowardly to do so when she only hurt her accidentally. The character in the show refused to forgive out of cowardice, then hid behind her memory to justify her mistreatment of her sister, and the woman at the beginning. She could have chosen to work through the emotions and be brave, but she CHOSE to be a loner out of cowardice.
There's no hell more harsh than a memory
She falls flat on her face, and they say, "Are you alright? Are you okay?"
Clearly ex military. If you know you know.
Yes it is better to be alone than constantly disappointed and heartbroken
So very true 👍
People here think having perfect or photographic memories is an open door to be a doctor or something.
The memory made her "special" but what actual good did it bring?
She is a waitress with no friends or family
I had to quit college two years short of a degree and went to work at a convenience store. I had low tier jobs the rest of my working years until I finally got tired of it and quit entirely at age 50. Now I'm 70 sitting in front of a computer wasting the time I have left. I'm not sure how long, as I have cancer on top of everything else.
I'm not good at making friends because it's hard to deal with people. I finally found a good friend a few years ago. Both our minds were sharp until the last few months then he was diagnosed with dementia. 2 months later he was gone and so was my sharp memory.
@@Grizzly_Adams. Yea that dementia is no joke. Friendships are great to have so I'm glad you had a good one for as long as it lasted
The comment House makes about the patient being a wealth of diagnostic information is ironic. He forgot that "everybody lies".
* has an eidetic memory *
* becomes a waitress *
That sounds like a perfect waitress.
Sheldon Cooper
She could earn a fortune with that
* complete inability to sympathise with her situation so makes a dumb comment about why isn't she making bank *
Also that's not even what eidetic memory means, it means short term imagine memory, so it was both a stupid *and* a highly inaccurate comment
My birthday is August 14 and this just randomly popped up in my feed 😆
My birthday is also August 14th lol
Ive never been more thankful for my terrible memory
Have to imagine that having perfect memory would make you a god-tier CS2 player.
Yeah. Made the terrible mistake of dating someone with a perfect memory. Turns out that just because they remember things doesn't mean they correctly interpret things. And they never forgive the things that they imagine you might have been thinking and punish you for non-existent offenses that they think your behavior pattern indicates for the future. And also get angry that you get angry that they are angry for things you haven't actually done.
This might be obvious to other people, or maybe I'm completely wrong... but the way Chase was holding the medication out to the lady, almost looked like a proposal, like proposing this situation to her...lol I think you guys know what I mean! 😎😇🤔😋
bless this was posted before lunch
I don't care if I remember about everything in my life.
This is a amazing ability that all humans should have, being able to remember everything means you can remember about so many things basically a cheat code in school while being a intimidating way to get under someone's skin for whatever they have done. Plus a man with perfect memory also means every event is accounted for.
This is simular to myself
I remember pretty much every wrong or hurt done to me in my entire life (my memory isnt perfect but i have very clear memories from as far back as 2 years old)
And all the memories i have taught me to notice all the prerequisites to being backstabbed or lied to,etc
And so its impossible for me to make friends because ill notice those signs and just cut that person off, i know everything from the shift in people expressions to the spacing in their sentences
So i dont bother with people anymore, im alone and yes, lonely
Everyone i meet all shiws thise same signs, and the more hurt im inflicted the worse a person i become
I used to be at least a decent person that people at least pretended to care about ,but all the hurt i have now that i cant simply "move on" from because i can never forget
Its not that im always thinking about it, but the instant a sign is noticed, i already know what the rest is going to be
Since most people can't remember their life...those that can are told they have a mental issue. But in reality it's the other way around.
Forgiveness is not a memory thing. It’s a philosophical thing.
No matter how good your memory is, it's useless if you have no common sense, situation reading, behavior awareness, or basic interaction skills, which are all textbook features of Asperger.
The signs are everywhere:
A rigid detail insists, a lack of interaction understanding or mixed with uncaring, and a narcissistic pattern of tyrannicaly forcing her memory based views on her surroundings while ignoring their reactions or will.
Life is too short to hold a grudge.
That thumbs up chase gives is priceless 😂
The cup in the last scene is not in the same orientation she obsessed over earlier.
My AuDHD gives me a great memory, but trauma from before diagnosis. I remember too many jerks from my early childhood. Good news is most of them live over a thousand miles away from me now. Family is slowly realizing their mistakes and trying to make up for it. When they realize they screw up, all is forgiven.
I’d just try to forgive them anyway. No sense in making them “make up for it.” I’m sure you’ve screwed up plenty of times too.
What is this @@Sniperboy5551
An argument? Nah, don't make up for it, it's my fault, never theirs. Puh.
What is AuDHD as opposed to ADHD as someone I care about has the same problem and I would love to be able to understand better
@@carollewis5931 ADHD with Autism. Autism wants everything the same while ADHD wants things different at the same time. Yes it is exhausting!
Most of my jerks died early from various causes. There was one in 9th grade that I actually told that I wished he was dead. He was killed in a car crash not long after that. Members of the class were collecting money to buy flowers for his funeral. They asked if I wanted to donate. I asked them if they were crazy. The funeral was during school hours, so the whole class skipped class that day, supposedly to attend the funeral, although I know most didn't. I went to class anyway and sat in the room by myself the whole class period so I wouldn't even appear to have feelings about the jerk.
Unforgiveness is like drinking poison, and hope the other gets sick.
Broken pieces of glass and ceramic and they turn her back side over onto the glass to make sure she was cut all around I guess
😂 😅 House says, "Drugs are never the answer."
😀 🤣
*Complains about her memories haunting her*
*Gets offered treatment*
“I’m gonna lose my memories?😱”
She's a dumpy, middle-aged waitress: what else did she have going for her? Better to be miserable and gifted than ordinarily unhappy and completely mediocre.
It is only natural to never forgive because you never forgot. That's how I stay so happy. 🙂
Just write the damage they caused off as a bad debt, don't talk about it widely, and do not extend them any further credit.
Technically, is still forgiveness.
The casting director should have cast Marilu Henner from Taxi fame..... She is one of the documented cases of this. See the bonkers 60 minutes (Australia) story on this that interviews her.
Forgiveness is not forgetting.
This issue is she remembers as if it happened that moment time heals it cant for here cause it feels like right then
You have no idea what your saying
It could be lupus?
Its never Lupus!
Autoimmune!
I love lupiss
@@minnie21434 except for that one time it was lupus
Beat me to it @@jessilynallendilla5014
😢😢I have bad memories that have become dim over time. No way would I want a perfect memory.
being alone is worth it. over time you accumulate fewer bad events. the longer you are alone the less you need to fight.
Agreed.
It’s also incredibly miserable, eventually you get to a point where every fiber of your being is screaming out to have some sort of social interaction but you don’t know how. And eveytime you try, you fail which causes you to retreat into isolation even more. The conflict that comes with social interaction is tough and sometimes hurts worse than the lonliness but I would rather deal with the fighting then spend another second alone with my thoughts.
@@depressedhomo9330
Fair enough. We’re all different 😊
We're not focusing on the bad memories. They're intrusive thoughts.
We're not hoarding them.
We just have a larger storage capacity.
SSRIs don't diminish your ability to remember, only your ability to care.
Having a memory like this is a curse. If i didn't figure out how to make it stop, I probably wouldn't be here today
"Having a memory (...) be here today"
So, how did you make it stop?
@knrdvmmlbkkn sleep deprivation made it shut off. Unfortunately, from that discovery came a couple of years heavily abusing amphetamines and alcohol because every time I slept and got sober, it would start again.
Sober now, but the flashbacks are nowhere near as prominent or often anymore.
The irony here is that McLeod syndrome counterindicates perfect memory, especially when they recognize its neurological and behavioral presentation. It’s more likely that someone will present with learning and developmental disorders, in other words an inability to fully process information and therefore remember it.
Her memory isn’t the issue, being a raging witch is. She purposefully focuses on the bad 😒
When you are in the hospital, medication isn't given to you in a medicine bottle with a monthly supply of pills. 1) A doctor doesn't dispense meds. Nurses do. 2) As a patient, you are only given your medication at a designated time. 3) Upon discharge is when you are given your prescription list and the preferred pharmacy you wish to pick 'em up.
When your RAM gets mixed with your ROM.
This was the glaring issue with the TV show Suits.
Having phenomenal memory is basically worthless for a lawyer, because it only applies to one part of (the R) of IRAC. Issue Rule Analysis Conclusion, and as far as points for each one, it is 1 for I, 1 for R, and 97 for A and 1 for C.
So getting one point out of 100 is not a good thing.
That title though🙄 forgiveness is a choice. Just because you remember everyone's mistakes, including your own, doesn't mean you can't forgive. If you choose not to forgive, that is your choice, not some symptom. That's just a way to shirk off the responsibility of being an adult and making that choice.
if she has perfect memory she could ace any exam, and yet she's a waitress lol