Yh but she was 16 when they started so she's 25 now if he's around the same age , yeah he's definitely not thinking about marriage right now cuz he may not be in the right financial situation yet.
I also was seeing someone for 10 years . He always said we will get married . I broke up with him . I have three children now and am happily married. Don’t waste your time ladies
Over 15yrs here 🙋🏽♀️ we broke up but would always find our ways back and get back together. Not married but it's hard with that much time invested since teenage years and he's not a bad guy, feels almost unethical, and times I initiated the breakup and would feel an enormous amount of guilt 😪
@@Ashley-og9tinothing great in gaining what you truly deserve comes easy. Either take the temporary difficult route with a better end of stay in your comfort zone and risk your future happiness.
@nov23 it's okay. So yes actually at one point very recently I decided I wanted to be celibate more for spiritual grounds. I meant this for sex and alcohol, smoking too. I told him this and he got very angry I mean I was shocked he even packed all his things ( said he pay rent /the bills so how I'm not giving him none). But he eventually calmed down and we were okay, other days he would be cool then when he tried I would remind him I didnt want to again until/if marriage. Sparking more arguments.. I'm not gon lie I eventually gave in, broke the celibacy and now it's the same thing feels like a cycle. Started drinking and falling back into my old ways. I held my promise for a while but I did feel bad bc we were always sexually active before, then i just cut it off and what was he supposed to do then since not desiring to be on the journey with me, which is okay I wouldn't want it to feel force or obligated. I'm just so lost now. He would feel some type of way when I wanted to go to church (haven't been in yearss). I can't leave. And when I wanted out people would ask why, and I couldn't explain or they can't understand sometimes I can't either bc we're otherwise good together. Idk but like I said we practically grew out of our teenage years into adults together we have so much history and now in a state where our family is not, it's just us.
10 years😢 It’s good you left I’m sure it was very hard to break up with him and start afresh because imagine investing 10 years in someone, it’ll be difficult to move on! Congrats to you, you’re really strong, to leave and move on! Now you have beautiful kids and you’re married to the right one!
@@Elisabeta.Marina In this modern society?? Please. If a woman is married by 30 then it's a miracle. You have to understand that these men in their age group are just not worth marrying. If a woman wants to get married, she needs to marry an older man or wait until she's in her 30s. That's just how it is. There's no way a woman can marry a man her age by age 25 and have a decent life. No way on this earth.
There's no timetable on marriage. True love wait. Nobody wants to rush into a situation and then get a divorce. Getting a divorce is worse than getting married. (The process). Women who rushes a man for a ring is a gold digger.
@@brandonm5394 I disagree with your statement about if a woman wants a ring that makes her a gold digger because that doesn’t make her a gold digger. She may wanna ring because it’s a symbolization of the love that they have when you’re ready to take the next step it’s a marriage. That’s how you know that person is your soulmate. That’s how you know you wanna be with the person for the rest of your life, but I do agree with you. That marriage is not a timetable. There is no rush to get married but if you’re with somebody for 20 years and you still don’t have a regular finger what are you necessarily doing with that person? Are you staying with them because you love them are you staying with them because you don’t wanna be alone
I was with my high school sweetheart for 10 years. I was ready, and he wasn't. I decided to take control of my life, as a single female. He went to work, and I packed and left. I never told him where I was going. Once my heart and mind synced, I said, "He's never going to marry me." He searched all over. He went to my parents and friends house looking for me. He left letters with my mom. He wrote that he was ready to get married, and apologized for stringing me along. I still never went back. My life is not a game. You don't get the final say when it comes to my happiness. A couple years later, I met my spouse in church. I've never been more in love. Girl, save yourself the heartache and go. Never buy a house to play house.
Why would you do that? Going away without a single word is so immature. The only justifiable reason is if he was abusive and dangerous, so you'd have to hide. But any other situation, it just wasn't fair to him. Especially if as you say he was ready to take the next step, only needed a bit of a push to rethink his priorities. And it's also fine if you decided to leave for whatever reason and make up your mind that it won't work - fine. But going _without a word_ that's extremely immature (unless, as I said, it's for safety reasons).
@@joane24 lol I think she made the best possible decision for her! She didn’t owe a word to anyone but the Lord and it all worked out in her favor. Fair is “you get what you give”. He strung her along so she left him with her silence. The same silence he gave her, as he never made marriage to her a priority, instead of an option only after she was already gone. I would say that’s more mature than leaving in a knock down drag out fight and being filled with bitterness and resentment. More power to her!
Right. He probably needs her to pay half the bills. He’s a loser. I wouldn’t buy anything with him especially if he doesn’t think enough of me to marry me.
Yes, I’m floored at people eager to sign mortgage documents with someone but reluctant to sign a marriage license. But I disagree with Steve Harvey that a house is the biggest purchase/decision you can go in on with someone. A house is a big deal, but kids are a bigger deal. I know people who had kids first and got married later and it worked out, but I think it’s way too risky
Holding on to her with a teaser, if he wishes to throw her away any time, he will and can. He is a liar under the guise of not being certain, he is certain and marriage to her is not it and has no integrity. Run Girl Run--don’t look back. Have no sentiment because he’s been there for a long time. He doesn’t care enough to make you fully his in every way legal. Go find someone that will treat you right in every way, love & loyalty in good times and bad. You are beautiful inside and out, find someone better for you. This dude is a dud toad, ain’t no prince for a princess. Sorry, some of us learn the hard way because we run into the wrong or evil people.
i want to know how common it is for a man to say something like this--like what are the statistics cause this is something rare a man would think of and it's not a bad thing. my first cousin's long-term boyfriend (high school sweethearts since they were both 16-17yrs old, they are the same age) just bought his first house (with his own money, not from his parent's help) end of last year at 24-25yrs old. now he's saving up to buy a ring and give her a nice wedding next. my cousin is aware of this probably except the marriage part or has an idea they will get married in the future, but i'm sure that will come as a surprise because she's happy and unemployed for almost two years right now and goes back and forth from his house to her parent's house. he's even helping her study for her college courses (they are the same age). i believe if the guy in the video, those are his true intentions, then it would be nice to get a house first and then get married unless they wanna live in a dump or with his parents or her parents while saving up for a house of their own--no one wants to live with their in-laws or even their own parents in general. it's not easy these days of course with this economy and inflation, but i'm proud of my cousin and what her long-term bf (i know will be her fiance/husband in the future) will accomplish in the near future if he already bought a house for them. her man is not forcing her to work, he wants her to focus on finishing college. once again, she's not paying a single penny on that mortgage cause her parents want her to focus on finishing school first and once she finishes school, she is allowed to go and permanently live with him. i must admit, i am a bit jealous though! 😭
Stupid thinking marriage these days means nothing and most the time its just a waste of money better to buy a house and build your wealth. In 2024 no one values marriage and most people you tell that you are getting married always think it wont last so in the end no one cares about marriage.
That man told her exactly what he about, what he’s working for and IT AIN’T HER. Pack up and move out. She’s young and well-spoken, she’ll find her counterpart. The one she had now is for learning.
I gave my ex an ultimatum 5 years into the relationship we got married a year later and 2 and a half years in the marriage he cheated. Don’t give an ultimatum just leave. Biggest mistake of my life.
You should never give someone an ultimatum. What you should have done is try to understand things from his pov and what's holding him back from making such a commitment. In his answers you would have found your answers to make a decision to leave or stay.
@@terence.j I did. His response was “I just need to be a better man before we get married” or “I need to do a lot more work before I become a husband.” Which I was so in love with him I never thought he could do anything wrong and so I wanted to be there as he worked on himself. I didn’t realize what he actually needed wasn’t a relationship it was time to himself. But you know, shoulda, coulda, woulda.
This! Steve mentioned his ultimatum made him propose, but he's cheated on his wife multiple times, something he failed to mention here. Something else that should be discussed, when a woman is a placeholder is one thing, but when she's a 'comfortable' placeholder is another. If she's a comfort he'll still want to keep her around as an asset from the benefits he gets from her and a woman leaving is a threat to his ego. Those are not real desires to keep you, but just things he can use that he doesn't want to disappear. There's no respect or love here.
Men who feel they are not financially stable enough for marriage should stop getting into serious relationships. 9 years is a ridiculous amount of time to wait for a man to get stable.
Men who love you won't ever make you wait that long even if they aren't financially stable. A man knows who is wife is going to be. Within 2 years, you should have a ring on your finger. Even if it's a cheap, throw away ring. Adams are built to know who their Eve is. If he's not, he's just using you for convenience. Men will marry you even if they don't like or love you.
This is why teen dating is a lose lose situation. The boy learns entitlement and the girl learns it’s ok to give away the best parts of herself for potential because keeping it real, no teen boy/young man has much to offer. Our dating culture is a mess because this practice is normalized.
Yep. If they separate, even if they did marry, that house would be his sole property from before marriage. She may help pay the mortgage, help fix it, furnish it, whatever … it will still be his house. He’s making financial decisions by building a business, buying a house … she needs to wake up.
My Neighbour in England London are from Portugal there still together 38 year have four children but they never married each other. You do not need marriage to prove your love for one another.
Agreed. If women were not so quick to give out husband privileges to those who are not their husband, there would be a lot less emotionally damaged women and fatherless children.
@@birdie.21. Yep. If we give it, they’ll take it. Tell them what you want in plain language, don’t whisper and coo (unless you want to). Teach them how to treat you and they’ll appreciate it! Hey, what man could pass up a guaranteed win with their woman? 🌻
@@shelby9118 yes she said 9 years and said they were 16 so I'm counting based on her count. She's basically wasting away her youth in the hopes that one day he will see her as a wife. I think they should go their separate ways and if he truly desires her in the future and she's still available he will find her...
@@hevinamberDefinitely agree. Many women are hesitant to leave because they think about the time they have invested. There is no time invested. It is a loss, a sunk cost, not an investment. Just cut your losses and move on. Girl, if a man doesn't give you a ring after 2 years max, you are not the woman of his dream. You're just gaslighting yourself thinking otherwise. Cut your losses and move on.
Coming from the best judge on this planet . A phenomenal woman lady whos learned every walk of her life lessons !!! Shes been sharing those lessons for years to and for those people smart enough strong enough to listen !!! When i cant sleep i watch her shows her insight astounds me . I put it to use in my life . Its not just about relationships its about LIFE . Thank you your in my thoughts and prayers daily . I know what your Now going through will be used to help others over come and move on
"Let's buy a house" is equivalent to giving you something to stfu. He doesn't want you, he wld marry the Woman he really wanted in 2 seconds. Leave while you're still young & vibrant.
My Neighbour in England London are from Portugal there still together 38 year have four children but they never married each other. You do not need marriage to prove your love for one another.
It's fine if both persons doesn't want to get married. These days it's common but the problem is when one side wants and other not. The same with children. If you want to have a child but your partner don't you should leave.
@Yunnanka75 I agree with you just because one does not want to get married does not mean he does not love the other person and not want to spend the rest of his life with them
Steve got a nudge and married his woman, called her his dream girl. But, Steve also cheated on said 'dream girl' three times. I agree - move on. Sometimes a guy gets a wife to have a wife, like an asset, but not for the purpose of a relationship.
My Neighbour in England London are from Portugal there still together 38 year have four children but they never married each other. You do not need marriage to prove your love for one another.
@@xejelahMy Neighbour in England London are from Portugal there still together 38 year have four children but they never married each other. You do not need marriage to prove your love for one another.
Okay, well this girl is not your neighbor, she does need a ring. Maybe her man could look for a woman like your neighbor. He is wastingthis woman's time and he knows it
Not true. I been with my girl for 13 years and we’re 26. We figure if it ain’t broke don’t fix it. A piece of paper doesn’t make us love eachother any more. If marriage is so good why the divorce rate so dam high ?
This beautiful girl needs to go her way!!!! She spent her girlhood, youth and beauty on this guy. He Does Not Plan To Marry You!! Allow Another To Find You.
She’s only 25. She’s still beautiful and young. He didn’t use up anything. He was in high school when he met her, and he’s still young and probably not mature enough for serious commitments. Doesn’t necessarily make him a bad person. It’s typical of a 25 year old.
@@nettegaines2067As an almost 29 years old woman who remember the time I was 25 like YESTERDAY I have to say that , I do believe that this is a dangerous mentality to have . 25 is still young yes , but it’s a very pivotal age . You only get married when you’re ready indeed. Maybe he ‘s not ready to marry right now for financial reasons , familial reasons etc . However , him not being able to give her a SINGLE hint, an idea or cues expressing his desire to marry her in the future is a major red flag . They are 25 not 15 years old . Their brains are fully developed now. After knowing her for 9 years, he should have some sort of ideas , about wanting to marry her in the future or not. If he doesn’t want to marry, he should let her know instead of wasting her time and energy so they can both move on . 5 years is going to fly by and boom , she’ll turn 30 …by then will she still rely on hope and love to hopefully mary him one day ? I hope not .
My husband on the first date said I’m looking for a wife. Months later we were married. Life is too short to be playing around and worried about money. Build together. Live together. And cherish each other.
Same. Been with my husband for 20 years now. We both knew right away we were the "one". He treated me like a wife from the start. I got a ring within 7 months. He is a great blessing from the Lord.
I like that. I met my husband at church, had a luncheon with the church singles and had a marraige proposal in 6 weeks driven my HIM. We waited until our wedding night. He was ready, knew what he wanted....and I was down
Most of these guys once they break up from their "long - term - girlfriend" who they hadn't married, will find another girlfriend and marry her after a year of dating 🤷♀️.
My ex did this! We dated for five years. I broke up with him and told him if he can complete counseling in 3 months, I would be back with him. I was focusing on the same. It was literally two weeks after we broke up that I found out about another woman through the mouth of a ten year old neighbor. He got her pregnant within a year and married her on our anniversary.
The thing is Steve, she’s not the chick of his dreams. He says what he said. I remember I just mentioned “we should get married” that weekend he was at the jewelry store. Men KNOW what/who they want. Why should he commit, he’s already getting ALL the benefits of having a wife with the freedom to leave without obligations.
Real talk.. 9yrs and you still don’t have a decision on marriage?? Nah.. it’s not legit and even if they got married it would fall apart coz it would be out of coercion.
@@Josh-xy3td what she wants is to be married eventually, that is her right,that's what she said.She just asked him if he thought about marriage-he clearly said no-if he loved her (after being in a 9 year relationship)even if he didn't want to get married soon the least he could've done was give her a positive response like "ive been thinking about it.." or "Or id like to think about that for the future" there was none of that-so no,he may not love her-not enough to even consider what she wanted for the future...you do that for the person you love.Steve said that- more or less.
A man who wants to get married doesn’t need to be asked. He would have talked about it even when you started dating. It would be in his conversations. Like “this is what I want to do when I get married, or the kind of family I wanna raise”. And he would be taking steps towards that. Not steps towards living together till Jesus comes back. I know it’s painful but you gotta move on. God will help you find your partner. Read Isaiah 34:16.
The best comment I’ve read! Thank you for sharing the truth and not leaving God out of the equation. People don’t realize they fail in many areas of their lives- including relationships- because they have left God out.
She should leave. I dated a man for about the same amount of time and despite my bringing up the topic of marriage he never did. Instead he went and married someone else. I wasted my youth on that man and I'm still single today 25 years later.
I feel this. I had two 6 year relationships, neither ended in marriage. The one I married asked me in a year. Yes, both of the other men married someone else in a much shorter time. I’m sorry you never found “the one” but it is better than “the wrong one” Peace & Blessings.
In the UK we call this man’s behaviour ‘having your cake and eating it’. He’s getting all the benefits (wink, wink) without giving her any commitment because he’s young, she’s the only girl he’s known and he doesn’t want to be tied down to mortgage, debt, wife, babies - not yet! I was in this situation myself so I can speak to this scenario. She needs to leave him to ponder and make a life for herself, minus him: if he wants her he’ll come forward with an offer - but she may just find someone better!!
@@dumfriesspearhead7398My Neighbour in England London are from Portugal there still together 38 year have four children but they never married each other and there very religious there Christian And that what the Girl in the video Boyfriend want. To love her and be with her for the rest of his life. Have children with her but do it without getting married. You do not need marriage to prove your love for one another.
My Neighbour in England London are from Portugal there still together 38 year have four children but they never married each other and there very religious there Christian And that what the Girl in the video Boyfriend want. To love her and be with her for the rest of his life. Have children with her but do it without getting married. You do not need marriage to prove your love for one another.
@@mrwahibtahri If they were REALLY Christian they'd be married because they're going against one of the fundamental tenets of their faith. So I don't buy that. Marriage affords legal protection, esp for women and children. She'd be a fool to stay with him without being married.
Dating from a young age into adulthood is SUCH a waste of time. You cant even explore yourself alone. You dont even know who you are when you are alone.
I agree! Why date if you are not planning on marrying anytime soon? Stay single and enjoy life with friends! Date when you desire marriage. I never see a positive relationship of someone who dated from teen years into adulthood that didn’t end in either divorce or cheating.
My Neighbour in England London are from Portugal there still together 38 year have four children but they never married each other. You do not need marriage to prove your love for one another.
My Neighbour in England London are from Portugal there still together 38 year have four children but they never married each other. You do not need marriage to prove your love for one another.
There most certainly IS such a thing as being “too invested” in a relationship if it’s obvious that it isn’t going anywhere. Cut your losses, and move on. Otherwise, you’ll look back and resent HIM for “wasting” your years.
The problem is that she is providing a lot of the benefits that used to only be provided by wives. Is she provides attention, devotion, dedicated time, SEX, companionship, etc, without marriage, he has Zero incentive to propose.
@@ExceptionalLex they lucked up. There are many who play that game and don't end up married. People make whatever choices they want to make and whatever the outcome is they have to be okay with it. Let's not pretend that most people play house in relationships and end up married. Most will go through several relationships before they finally get the chance to marry while some never get the chance. It is what it is.
@ExceptionalLex I said she was providing a lot of the benefits that only married women used to provide. She wants to be married but she’s still with him and she’s providing those benefits despite his desires and actions being different than hers. Plus, she also said she’s been with him since she was 15. It’s possible she was a virgin which makes it that much harder for her to leave (if that’s the case). Exchanging spiritual energy with people can emotionally connect a woman to her lover prematurely. You can be with someone for years and not realize you don’t want the same things. It’s ideal to determine if you’re a match and if you both intend to move forward with the same goals before getting intimate and letting your heart and vagina override your logically brain.
I wasted my youth on a high school relationship and ended up leaving after several years…then I met my husband, dated for 6 months and got engaged then got married 6 months later. Ladies, if he wanted to marry you he would! Also being engaged for 5 years is just as bad as staying for 10 unmarried.🥴🥴 Trust me, the right one will not want to wait that long.
She's a placeholder. That's it, that's all. My spouse and I got married in our mid 20s, and we built it from the ground up together. Let that man go so you can flourish and prosper
This is a good way to put it, I like the word usage "place holders," I believe this "place holder" culture needs to stop! Many men do this, if she was the rib he'd be saying baby let's get married. I see bones of my bones and flesh of my flesh let's do this...but in this last day's culture you can forget it! Why buy the cow when you already milked it! 💯
@@Royal_DiademMy Neighbour in England London are from Portugal there still together 38 year have four children but they never married each other. You do not need marriage to prove your love for one another.
@@klickingkayasmr7585My Neighbour in England London are from Portugal there still together 38 year have four children but they never married each other. You do not need marriage to prove your love for one another.
My Neighbour in England London are from Portugal there still together 38 year have four children but they never married each other. You do not need marriage to prove your love for one another.
In the words of Judge Lynn Toler, "Don't ever let a man tell you twice he don't want you." The man clearly doesn't want her and I think she knows this but she's scared to break that tie. She needs to move on because she ain't getting any younger.
My Neighbour in England London are from Portugal there still together 38 year have four children but they never married each other. You do not need marriage to prove your love for one another.
As someone that has been in a long term relationship in my 20s and now out of it and happily married.....don't waste your time. You're lucky, you're 25. Don't waste your youth on someone whose not on the same page as you because trust me there are guys out there that want the same things as you.
My Neighbour in England London are from Portugal there still together 38 year have four children but they never married each other. You do not need marriage to prove your love for one another.
If you have been dating for 9 years and don't have a ring And he wants to buy a house with you RED flag. He needs your help to finance his home. She needs to 🏃 while she's still young He's obviously not going to marry her
That logic is so backwards. Marriage isn't this grand and life-fullfilling thing for everybody. If the guy says he wants to buy a house with her, that's literally his way of saying he's all in with her. They have been together for 9 years. Marriage isn't gonna change that. Y'all gotta stop putting your values onto others THAT DON'T FIT THEM and for some reason judge them ON THAT TOO? If that dude wouldn't love her, that relationship wouldn't have lasted for 9 years. Use your head.
@@Tenseiken_You sound like you're 15 years old, the unmarried folks move in and out with new people in their homes all day because they aren't committed
No him buying a home sounds like a step towards marriage. 9 years is long but they were 16. I believe marriage is next on his list. He’s still growing up 😊
9 years: you know you like me, stop that nonsense. She scared because it's been 9 years and that's all she's known and he's too comfortable now. 25 y.o is still young but she got to make a decision NOW. I'm 33 and never let a guy more than 3 years.
I gave men 12months, then it's next! Even Steve says a man knows in 6months, which is actually true. My husband proposed after 4 months! Men just waste women's time and we have to stand up and not let it continue!
Don't Buy large purchases with anyone. Protect what your Building for Yourself. Be Careful. Trust yourself. I can tell you Stories. I have Alot of Regret. Don't Give Yourself to Anyone , only your Children.
Yes great advice Steve..she wants the relationship on paper and he doesn't. She should not buy a house with this man. He wants what he wants but can't return the favor. He sounds like a control freak who avoiding marriage. She should protect herself and all investments with this dude. Find you a man who not only makes you happy but also wants what you want.
They already said something but she didn't listen and thought she knew better because she's in the relationship, not them. When friends and family are saying something, those who know you best are saying something to help, they care, think on their 2 cents a bit more, especially if they're wise parents/friends who truly care for her.When all her family & friends tell her to let him go, don't remain 'loyal' you have to wonder why they're all giving you that similar advice. They're seeing something you are not for being 'in the relationship'. No one wants her hurt, but to keep going, down the line she will realize she's hurt herself so bad in standing by a man with many red flags.
That house is for his future wife, and that’s not you. You’re a place holder, and your youth is being used. Move on. Fully and completely. He’s NOT yours. Cry for two weeks and keep it moving. His loss. If a man isn’t marrying you in 12months, 24mnths at most, he’s not yours. End of. We need to stop lying to ourselves. Don’t be used, you aren’t a ‘thing’. No such thing as a long engagement either. Smh. Tactics. Don’t let some dull man waste the time that belongs to someone who actually loves you. Pray, fast, and keep it moving. You’ll be alright.
@@silentnight9655 Men need to step down off of their pedestal because it is not all about "YOU." It's not just up to "your choosing." You don't have the final say if she is the one. She does. So, you don't know. LOL. No point in asking her to marry you if you just "know."
Typical man. He keeps the good girl at home to himself. And might be slinging it all over town. Girl, " he's not that into you" continue self love. And let a man that really wants you show up. She really answered her own question!
He needs the well-behaved Woman he doesn’t care about to do all his housework while he cheats with a Woman who can’t wash a dish. Standard male behaviour.
I think he’s saying no bc he wants to see what else is out there since he’s been with this girl since teenage years. He will find out the hard way that the grass ain’t greener. He’s gonna regret losing her.
If he regrets losing her because "the grass is greener," then it really shows he's with her to benefit himself. If he regrets losing her, it's from a purely selfish place of wanting to use her.
At 3:40 "Men don't do NOTHING without a reason" Steve said a word. I wish more women knew this. Men have better boundaries and are far more pragmatic and operate totally in their own self interest. If they break up (which they should btw) he'll find another woman, marry her and start having kids quicker than Roadrunner. This gf is merely a placeholder. Dude is busy stealing her youth, beauty and all of the services she's providing him with no commitment on his part. It's a bad deal; she needs to move on pronto.
My Neighbour in England London are from Portugal there still together 38 year have four children but they never married each other. You do not need marriage to prove your love for one another.
I agree with Steve on this one! A man doesn’t invest in something unless he wants to and he need her for a house but he doesn’t want to get married. Now what kind of sense does that make!! Think about it!! I know it’s been a long time with him but he’s not ready and she needs to give him and ultimatum. If he wants to be with her he will marry her. Stop play house with these men ladies. A man is only going to do what you allow him to do!! I hope she uses good wisdom and judgment.
Thank Goodness she didn’t get pregnant! 🤰🏽 Whew! The love of your youth may not be the same for your maturity. Why people grow apart. I think they’ve grown but he wants he to hang and feed and find his dreams while ignoring hers.
She is a placeholder until he finds “the one”. Since she is his high school sweetheart he is not going thinking that much ahead. Soon as he finds someone else he is going to end it. No matter how much you love someone it’s more beneficial to walk away and focus on yourself when you don’t have a ring.
She's so pretty. Sweetheart, leave while you still have your beauty. He doesn't want you. You're a placeholder. He was direct. Believe him. Free yourself and live your life... without him. I hope she chooses herself ♥️
Absolutely.......most men don't respect women who make themselves available to them sexually. They're getting what they want. Men want a woman who is a challenge.
bingo, it will also help to keep you from developing soul ties with the wrong people, and help to keep your mind clear and focused, so you can see a persons red flags
Bulshit.. My grandmother was a virgin and she was with an alcoholic... Being virgin doesn't make happy marrage.. He can change with years and it can become really bad.. You are delusional... Nothing can garantee you anything, it's all bedtime story.. People change, there is no way to garantee that your virginity will attract god person.. It's delusional...
My grandmother vas virgin and all she had is alcoholic... Being virgin doesn't mean you will get a god guy.. People change, start cheeteing and gambling no matter on your virginity and marrage.. You are delusional...
No sex or any form of sensual intimacy before marriage would solve these problems really quick. People sin and then wonder how is this not working out…
This sounds old-fashioned but we women mustn’t put the cart before the horse! Why give him all the comforts of a wife without the security of that one would have? Without the respect and admiration of a husband? Let him go pay some floozy for “the wife experience”, if that be the case. 💲💄
@@yvettemarshallTWN…❤ old fashion or not, it works😉 l’m a highly impatient person and l don’t mince words. Any man that asked me out l told them l was dating for marriage prospects. With my husband l told him l didn’t intend to sleep with him until our honeymoon and if he had a problem, he could walk. We didn’t see each other for about 3 weeks or maybe longer. When he returned he proposed and we married a couple of months later. 27 Years and counting❤❤❤❤
Exactly. Why would they buy the cow when they can get the milk for free. We women need to pull the handbrake on sex! Make men respect us because we respect ourselves.
I wish every woman understood this. Women wonder why the man is with them for years but don't put a ring on it, they don't need to, they got a wife without any legal commitment.
A man who really wants to marry you won’t have you waiting years iam not playing house with no man doing things a wife should do for him and we not married
lets talk about a realistic scenario here, he finds his wife about to be attacked by another man, should he A: Step up and defend her by potentially risking his life or B: Do nothing seeing as she isn't his wife and therefore doesn't get the wife protection? Women need to realize that they are getting the benefit of A by being a partner of a man irregardless of "wife" status. just as much as a man should be getting the benefit of wifely duties irregardless of "husband" status. Men will put their lives on the line even when they have started dating, some women will say she shouldn't reciprocate any nurturing values a woman brings until married?? how silly.
I know girls from highschool that didn't have enough confidence to stand on their own, and told me they didn't want to be alone, so they went from boyfriend to boyfriend so they could have no year gaps of "singleness" (which helps you learn about yourself,) and always say I have a man. Well ... 🤦♀️ Said truth, the vast majority of wedlock breakers are cohabiting, women and men in the media, as females be braggin' about "I have a man" yet are settling. As the SIN rises to the ceiling and hits the fan!!" SMH, "Last day's culture." These are not biblical relationships and TMH God knows it. Only a remnant 🙏
I know girls from highschool that didn't have enough confidence to stand on their own, and told me they didn't want to be alone, so they went from boyfriend to boyfriend so they could have no year gaps of "singleness" (which helps you learn about yourself,) and always say I have a man. Well ... 🤦♀️ Said truth, the vast majority of wedlock breakers are cohabiting, women and men in the media, as females be braggin' about "I have a man" yet are settling. As the SIN rises to the ceiling and hits the fan!!" SMH, "Last day's culture." These are not biblical relationships and TMH God knows it. Only a remnant 🙏
The fact that he wants to buy a house means that he's thoughtful, financially stable and would make it throughout the wedlock. But then since he has never ever talked about it or is not in his plans, it's clear that he doesn't intend spending the rest of his life with this young lady. The lady will realise she's wasted her time once they go pathways🤞
Unless it's her money lol He might be thinking she is going to be a big part of the house purchase, so he needs her for that. If she's working and has her s*t together then he probably sees her as an asset at the moment.
Why CANT she see other men while they aren’t together? If he doesn’t want to marry her, she needs to find someone who will! He wants her to help him pay his mortgage.
Because she needs to finish what she had clean, a clean break, start over, don't mess it up some more. If the next one does the same, cut the losses sooner, run, don't look back and stare, keep going towards the goal of your dreams. She deserves that, she just has to find someone else better that has the same life goals and dreams. Many more fish in the sea, but once you find the catch, keep that gem and don't let them go.
He's seriously playing in her face by telling her he's not thinking about marriage but wants to by a house. Then he says he wanrs to be financially stable--if you aren't financially stable, why would you by a house?? Bye, sir.
She needs to move on, he will only waste her time and youth. I speak from experience of previously being in a relationship with a guy for 16 years (my first bf), though in my case i was strung along by empty promises of marriage. They wont hesitate if they know you're the one, and it doesnt take that long for them to figure that out. I wish i had just trusted my instincts and left a lot earlier.
I'm a 70-year-old black man. You are absolutely right. A man who is ready to marry doesn't take long to make the choice, and he won't hesitate to lock it down. He won't even want a long engagement. If he's not ready to marry, then he doesn't see the woman he's with as wife material...that's why he's with her. If/when he does get ready to marry, because he's never seen her as wife material in all that time, he's going to look around for other options. Ladies, don't waste your youth. If you're ready to marry, look for a man who is ready to marry _right now._
Walk away. If not, then run! Do not give a man an ultimatum, neither soft nor hard. Move on with your life. Steve is giving his perspective and he has no idea what having to give an ultimatum to a man will do to you.
Steven is a lil sus - if his wife is his 'dream girl' then why did he cheat on her 3 times? I've also met men who like to "take a woman off the market" simply because he knows she's a good woman and that's always an asset to a man, not because he actually wants 'her'. Steve never talks about that.
Yup that’s what I did. I know some judge this but I set ultimatums after a few years. I said you have 3 months. Was proposed to in 3 days lol. 11 years of marriage down and still happy. ladies put yourself first - always. Because it’s extremely true “if he wants to he will” and that’s them putting themselves first.
That's similar story to me , I've been with my bf for 7 years and no ring. He's given me a pearl ring, which I don't even like pearls and have no idea why he would even get me that... because I'm very specific about what I like. I was married and have been separated for a very long time. Idk what to do at this point
@@TheMingez2 Leave. If he gives you a pearl ring KNOWING you don't like pearls, he certainly doesn't love you; he may not even like you very much and doesn't respect you. That's no way to be treated in a relationship.
Be careful of those placeholder relationships. You could wait decades & not get that person to move an inch for you & then watch them walk out the door & move the world for the person they really want. I've seen it happen & the placeholders always seem like they're about to lose their minds.
Some very good advice. If more people followed this guide line this day and age there would be less issues. You need to stand firm with what you need or your happiness is altered and you're not being true to you.
🙄You need to be on the same page, if he don't you can't force a man. It dosent take him years to figure out if he wants to marry you! You seem lovely don't waste your young years Sis!!
This is why I don’t agree with dating as teenagers. The dating culture has made boys/men lazy and entitled and made women confused and demeaning of their feminine time, energy, and resources. This girl was hooked as a teen into a pointless circumstance that continued into her adulthood. What a waste of time on her part, while he’s accessed her all these years in exchange for nothing.
Forget him and whatever commitment issues he has. Go live your life before he wastes your best years on wishing and hoping. If you guys break up, he will find the girl of his dreams within 6 months.
The man does not want to marry you. I understand that you love this man, but the love needs to be mutual. The compromise and commitment needs to be mutual. If you do not want the same thing, then you need to move on. Easier said than done. Many people stay in relationships too long. Your dreams are important too. Do not let it go another 7 or 8 years. Pray about it!
After 9 years.....He said no. Time to go.
Too bad she waited 9 years to ask. She probably would have received the same answer 5 years ago. 😬
@@ashleyw.6702 She's , its not too late.
Unfortunately for her she wasted her own time
@@hopeking200this is me and feeling like such a fool😪
Yh but she was 16 when they started so she's 25 now if he's around the same age , yeah he's definitely not thinking about marriage right now cuz he may not be in the right financial situation yet.
I also was seeing someone for 10 years . He always said we will get married . I broke up with him . I have three children now and am happily married. Don’t waste your time ladies
Over 15yrs here 🙋🏽♀️ we broke up but would always find our ways back and get back together. Not married but it's hard with that much time invested since teenage years and he's not a bad guy, feels almost unethical, and times I initiated the breakup and would feel an enormous amount of guilt 😪
@@Ashley-og9tinothing great in gaining what you truly deserve comes easy. Either take the temporary difficult route with a better end of stay in your comfort zone and risk your future happiness.
@nov23 it's okay. So yes actually at one point very recently I decided I wanted to be celibate more for spiritual grounds. I meant this for sex and alcohol, smoking too. I told him this and he got very angry I mean I was shocked he even packed all his things ( said he pay rent /the bills so how I'm not giving him none). But he eventually calmed down and we were okay, other days he would be cool then when he tried I would remind him I didnt want to again until/if marriage.
Sparking more arguments..
I'm not gon lie I eventually gave in, broke the celibacy and now it's the same thing feels like a cycle. Started drinking and falling back into my old ways. I held my promise for a while but I did feel bad bc we were always sexually active before, then i just cut it off and what was he supposed to do then since not desiring to be on the journey with me, which is okay I wouldn't want it to feel force or obligated. I'm just so lost now. He would feel some type of way when I wanted to go to church (haven't been in yearss). I can't leave. And when I wanted out people would ask why, and I couldn't explain or they can't understand sometimes I can't either bc we're otherwise good together.
Idk but like I said we practically grew out of our teenage years into adults together we have so much history and now in a state where our family is not, it's just us.
@nov23 sorry if I overanswered the question lol I think I just needed to vent a lil too 😭
10 years😢
It’s good you left I’m sure it was very hard to break up with him and start afresh because imagine investing 10 years in someone, it’ll be difficult to move on! Congrats to you, you’re really strong, to leave and move on! Now you have beautiful kids and you’re married to the right one!
At least she’s only 25.
Girl, leave. Too pretty and sweet for that
25 is not 20, at 25 should have been already married with kids if she s not a career lady.
She shouldn't just "leave". People need to stop being so flippant with relationships. She needs to talk to him properly and intentionally.
@@Elisabeta.Marina Says who? 😂 Y'all are weird.
@@Elisabeta.Marina In this modern society?? Please. If a woman is married by 30 then it's a miracle. You have to understand that these men in their age group are just not worth marrying. If a woman wants to get married, she needs to marry an older man or wait until she's in her 30s.
That's just how it is. There's no way a woman can marry a man her age by age 25 and have a decent life. No way on this earth.
@@mellamobrittneypeople think 25 is old now
This is the oldest trick in a time waster's book. Don’t let your boyfriend keep you from your husband.
Well said!
Facts 💯💯
There's no timetable on marriage. True love wait. Nobody wants to rush into a situation and then get a divorce. Getting a divorce is worse than getting married. (The process). Women who rushes a man for a ring is a gold digger.
Exactly
@@brandonm5394 I disagree with your statement about if a woman wants a ring that makes her a gold digger because that doesn’t make her a gold digger. She may wanna ring because it’s a symbolization of the love that they have when you’re ready to take the next step it’s a marriage. That’s how you know that person is your soulmate. That’s how you know you wanna be with the person for the rest of your life, but I do agree with you. That marriage is not a timetable. There is no rush to get married but if you’re with somebody for 20 years and you still don’t have a regular finger what are you necessarily doing with that person? Are you staying with them because you love them are you staying with them because you don’t wanna be alone
I was with my high school sweetheart for 10 years. I was ready, and he wasn't. I decided to take control of my life, as a single female. He went to work, and I packed and left. I never told him where I was going. Once my heart and mind synced, I said, "He's never going to marry me." He searched all over. He went to my parents and friends house looking for me. He left letters with my mom. He wrote that he was ready to get married, and apologized for stringing me along. I still never went back. My life is not a game. You don't get the final say when it comes to my happiness. A couple years later, I met my spouse in church. I've never been more in love. Girl, save yourself the heartache and go. Never buy a house to play house.
Why would you do that? Going away without a single word is so immature. The only justifiable reason is if he was abusive and dangerous, so you'd have to hide. But any other situation, it just wasn't fair to him. Especially if as you say he was ready to take the next step, only needed a bit of a push to rethink his priorities.
And it's also fine if you decided to leave for whatever reason and make up your mind that it won't work - fine. But going _without a word_ that's extremely immature (unless, as I said, it's for safety reasons).
Ooh yes, I see a morale dilemma here. Do you think you could’ve gone about this a different way? I am glad you have a happy ending though
@@joane24 lol I think she made the best possible decision for her! She didn’t owe a word to anyone but the Lord and it all worked out in her favor. Fair is “you get what you give”. He strung her along so she left him with her silence. The same silence he gave her, as he never made marriage to her a priority, instead of an option only after she was already gone. I would say that’s more mature than leaving in a knock down drag out fight and being filled with bitterness and resentment. More power to her!
@@joane24 If you can give the guy the benefit of the doubt, spare the same with her. 10 years with no sign of commitment is more immature.
She didn't owe that man anymore words. She gave him ten years worth of words. Good for you ma'am on leaving and never looking back!
He is thinking about buying a house but not marriage. He is not the one for you.
It’s definitely an excuse
Right. He probably needs her to pay half the bills. He’s a loser. I wouldn’t buy anything with him especially if he doesn’t think enough of me to marry me.
Yes, I’m floored at people eager to sign mortgage documents with someone but reluctant to sign a marriage license. But I disagree with Steve Harvey that a house is the biggest purchase/decision you can go in on with someone. A house is a big deal, but kids are a bigger deal. I know people who had kids first and got married later and it worked out, but I think it’s way too risky
Holding on to her with a teaser, if he wishes to throw her away any time, he will and can. He is a liar under the guise of not being certain, he is certain and marriage to her is not it and has no integrity. Run Girl Run--don’t look back. Have no sentiment because he’s been there for a long time. He doesn’t care enough to make you fully his in every way legal. Go find someone that will treat you right in every way, love & loyalty in good times and bad. You are beautiful inside and out, find someone better for you. This dude is a dud toad, ain’t no prince for a princess. Sorry, some of us learn the hard way because we run into the wrong or evil people.
i want to know how common it is for a man to say something like this--like what are the statistics cause this is something rare a man would think of and it's not a bad thing. my first cousin's long-term boyfriend (high school sweethearts since they were both 16-17yrs old, they are the same age) just bought his first house (with his own money, not from his parent's help) end of last year at 24-25yrs old. now he's saving up to buy a ring and give her a nice wedding next. my cousin is aware of this probably except the marriage part or has an idea they will get married in the future, but i'm sure that will come as a surprise because she's happy and unemployed for almost two years right now and goes back and forth from his house to her parent's house. he's even helping her study for her college courses (they are the same age). i believe if the guy in the video, those are his true intentions, then it would be nice to get a house first and then get married unless they wanna live in a dump or with his parents or her parents while saving up for a house of their own--no one wants to live with their in-laws or even their own parents in general. it's not easy these days of course with this economy and inflation, but i'm proud of my cousin and what her long-term bf (i know will be her fiance/husband in the future) will accomplish in the near future if he already bought a house for them. her man is not forcing her to work, he wants her to focus on finishing college. once again, she's not paying a single penny on that mortgage cause her parents want her to focus on finishing school first and once she finishes school, she is allowed to go and permanently live with him. i must admit, i am a bit jealous though! 😭
Asked about marriage and he said flat out and an emphatic "no"...so moving on is the only option.
Stupid thinking marriage these days means nothing and most the time its just a waste of money better to buy a house and build your wealth. In 2024 no one values marriage and most people you tell that you are getting married always think it wont last so in the end no one cares about marriage.
🎯
She was too young to tell at the time. i hope she moved on...
That man told her exactly what he about, what he’s working for and IT AIN’T HER. Pack up and move out. She’s young and well-spoken, she’ll find her counterpart. The one she had now is for learning.
She kinda… i don’t want to say dumb. But she being used as filler.
I gave my ex an ultimatum 5 years into the relationship we got married a year later and 2 and a half years in the marriage he cheated. Don’t give an ultimatum just leave. Biggest mistake of my life.
So sorry about that. You’re so beautiful.
You should never give someone an ultimatum. What you should have done is try to understand things from his pov and what's holding him back from making such a commitment. In his answers you would have found your answers to make a decision to leave or stay.
@@terence.j I did. His response was “I just need to be a better man before we get married” or “I need to do a lot more work before I become a husband.” Which I was so in love with him I never thought he could do anything wrong and so I wanted to be there as he worked on himself. I didn’t realize what he actually needed wasn’t a relationship it was time to himself. But you know, shoulda, coulda, woulda.
@@littlechocchip thank you!
This! Steve mentioned his ultimatum made him propose, but he's cheated on his wife multiple times, something he failed to mention here. Something else that should be discussed, when a woman is a placeholder is one thing, but when she's a 'comfortable' placeholder is another. If she's a comfort he'll still want to keep her around as an asset from the benefits he gets from her and a woman leaving is a threat to his ego. Those are not real desires to keep you, but just things he can use that he doesn't want to disappear. There's no respect or love here.
Men who feel they are not financially stable enough for marriage should stop getting into serious relationships. 9 years is a ridiculous amount of time to wait for a man to get stable.
No woman should be waiting that long. Who advises young people these days? There's a lot of negligence around.
Men who love you won't ever make you wait that long even if they aren't financially stable. A man knows who is wife is going to be. Within 2 years, you should have a ring on your finger. Even if it's a cheap, throw away ring. Adams are built to know who their Eve is. If he's not, he's just using you for convenience. Men will marry you even if they don't like or love you.
This is why teen dating is a lose lose situation.
The boy learns entitlement and the girl learns it’s ok to give away the best parts of herself for potential because keeping it real, no teen boy/young man has much to offer.
Our dating culture is a mess because this practice is normalized.
They were together when they were babies . Come on pls relax with this nonsense.
She should tell him she wants to be married or she’s leaving. Since 16 is crazy but more than 3 years as an adult is too much
He wants to buy a house with her so she can fund his investment
Bingo!
Another dusty
Yep. If they separate, even if they did marry, that house would be his sole property from before marriage. She may help pay the mortgage, help fix it, furnish it, whatever … it will still be his house. He’s making financial decisions by building a business, buying a house … she needs to wake up.
And he wants her sweat equity too
Or maybe he doesn't want to risk everything he's built up if she decides to divorce him.
She should walk away. Period!
My Neighbour in England London are from Portugal there still together 38 year have four children but they never married each other.
You do not need marriage to prove your love for one another.
%1000
He got what he wanted - sex
She took a loss
He would marry the woman of his dreams in the morning and build.You're not the one
He got comfortable. He wasting her time too. I hate that men will sit there and do that. Ridiculous.
@@malstarrainbow yep. Because us women give it up. Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free.
💯
Agreed. If women were not so quick to give out husband privileges to those who are not their husband, there would be a lot less emotionally damaged women and fatherless children.
@@birdie.21. Yep. If we give it, they’ll take it. Tell them what you want in plain language, don’t whisper and coo (unless you want to). Teach them how to treat you and they’ll appreciate it! Hey, what man could pass up a guaranteed win with their woman? 🌻
Girl ....nooooooo! Run! He already told youu .. in some many ways
What are you talking about ?? He has the right to say no , not right now
They are soo young , 25 y/o is nothing
@@shelby91189 years wasted. He has the right to say not right now and she has the right to walk away
@@hevinamber so you’re counting from when they were 16yo . But yeah she has the right to leave him too if she don’t want to wait more…
@@shelby9118 yes she said 9 years and said they were 16 so I'm counting based on her count. She's basically wasting away her youth in the hopes that one day he will see her as a wife. I think they should go their separate ways and if he truly desires her in the future and she's still available he will find her...
@@hevinamberDefinitely agree. Many women are hesitant to leave because they think about the time they have invested. There is no time invested. It is a loss, a sunk cost, not an investment. Just cut your losses and move on.
Girl, if a man doesn't give you a ring after 2 years max, you are not the woman of his dream. You're just gaslighting yourself thinking otherwise. Cut your losses and move on.
He says, that he is not financially stable for marriage, but wants to buy a house? What kind of logic is that?
Maybe he wanted to buy it with her money lol
@@miraieditsoooh, yes! That is right!
Marriage cost more than a house
Why can’t you follow that fact 😂
"Don't let a man tell you he don't want you more than once."~ Judge Lynn Toler.
Coming from the best judge on this planet . A phenomenal woman lady whos learned every walk of her life lessons !!! Shes been sharing those lessons for years to and for those people smart enough strong enough to listen !!! When i cant sleep i watch her shows her insight astounds me . I put it to use in my life . Its not just about relationships its about LIFE . Thank you your in my thoughts and prayers daily . I know what your Now going through will be used to help others over come and move on
"Let's buy a house" is equivalent to giving you something to stfu. He doesn't want you, he wld marry the Woman he really wanted in 2 seconds. Leave while you're still young & vibrant.
Yep same as a shut up engagement ring that doesn’t lead to marriage. Just a lonnnnnngggg as engagement.
My Neighbour in England London are from Portugal there still together 38 year have four children but they never married each other.
You do not need marriage to prove your love for one another.
It's fine if both persons doesn't want to get married. These days it's common but the problem is when one side wants and other not. The same with children. If you want to have a child but your partner don't you should leave.
@Yunnanka75 I agree with you just because one does not want to get married does not mean he does not love the other person and not want to spend the rest of his life with them
@@mrwahibtahriIt's called respect and common decency to marry a woman after frkn 38 years, pathetic
He don’t need a nudge. He doesn’t want you girl.
Steve got a nudge and married his woman, called her his dream girl. But, Steve also cheated on said 'dream girl' three times. I agree - move on. Sometimes a guy gets a wife to have a wife, like an asset, but not for the purpose of a relationship.
My Neighbour in England London are from Portugal there still together 38 year have four children but they never married each other.
You do not need marriage to prove your love for one another.
@@xejelahMy Neighbour in England London are from Portugal there still together 38 year have four children but they never married each other.
You do not need marriage to prove your love for one another.
Okay, well this girl is not your neighbor, she does need a ring. Maybe her man could look for a woman like your neighbor. He is wastingthis woman's time and he knows it
Not true. I been with my girl for 13 years and we’re 26. We figure if it ain’t broke don’t fix it. A piece of paper doesn’t make us love eachother any more. If marriage is so good why the divorce rate so dam high ?
This beautiful girl needs to go her way!!!! She spent her girlhood, youth and beauty on this guy. He Does Not Plan To Marry You!! Allow Another To Find You.
She’s only 25. She’s still beautiful and young. He didn’t use up anything. He was in high school when he met her, and he’s still young and probably not mature enough for serious commitments. Doesn’t necessarily make him a bad person. It’s typical of a 25 year old.
@@nettegaines2067It makes him someone she should leave. He's using her, so it does make him a bad person.
@@nettegaines2067 though only 25, she now has 9 years of baggage for her future husband to unpack
@@dumfriesspearhead7398 wow, you nailed it.
@@nettegaines2067As an almost 29 years old woman who remember the time I was 25 like YESTERDAY I have to say that , I do believe that this is a dangerous mentality to have . 25 is still young yes , but it’s a very pivotal age . You only get married when you’re ready indeed. Maybe he ‘s not ready to marry right now for financial reasons , familial reasons etc . However , him not being able to give her a SINGLE hint, an idea or cues expressing his desire to marry her in the future is a major red flag . They are 25 not 15 years old . Their brains are fully developed now. After knowing her for 9 years, he should have some sort of ideas , about wanting to marry her in the future or not. If he doesn’t want to marry, he should let her know instead of wasting her time and energy so they can both move on . 5 years is going to fly by and boom , she’ll turn 30 …by then will she still rely on hope and love to hopefully mary him one day ? I hope not .
My husband on the first date said I’m looking for a wife. Months later we were married. Life is too short to be playing around and worried about money. Build together. Live together. And cherish each other.
I agree
🩷
Same. Been with my husband for 20 years now. We both knew right away we were the "one". He treated me like a wife from the start. I got a ring within 7 months. He is a great blessing from the Lord.
I like that. I met my husband at church, had a luncheon with the church singles and had a marraige proposal in 6 weeks driven my HIM. We waited until our wedding night. He was ready, knew what he wanted....and I was down
I knew that my husband was the one halfway through our first coffee date
Most of these guys once they break up from their "long - term - girlfriend" who they hadn't married, will find another girlfriend and marry her after a year of dating 🤷♀️.
Or less than a year... I've seen a couple of cases near me.
My ex did this! We dated for five years. I broke up with him and told him if he can complete counseling in 3 months, I would be back with him. I was focusing on the same.
It was literally two weeks after we broke up that I found out about another woman through the mouth of a ten year old neighbor.
He got her pregnant within a year and married her on our anniversary.
@@nicoleraheem1195 I am sorry to hear that! I hope you are doing well now 🙏
Yes, and then divorced the one they married. Girl, just move on. Guy is not worth another year.
My ex did this. We lived together for 10 years, he married another woman. Boy, do i feel stupid!
The thing is Steve, she’s not the chick of his dreams. He says what he said. I remember I just mentioned “we should get married” that weekend he was at the jewelry store. Men KNOW what/who they want. Why should he commit, he’s already getting ALL the benefits of having a wife with the freedom to leave without obligations.
This right here!
How true
Real talk.. 9yrs and you still don’t have a decision on marriage?? Nah.. it’s not legit and even if they got married it would fall apart coz it would be out of coercion.
Yep, the saying is true, "why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free". Stop having sex too early with men. Women respect yourselves!!
Only if he had any decency. I suppose that is too much to ask. These men
She IS beautiful, someone would love her the way he won’t.
how he dosent love her ? just because he dosent wanna get married ?
She sure is that,any one who has been in a relationship for that long,and doesn't even say he thinks about a future with her-she should move on.
@@Josh-xy3td what she wants is to be married eventually, that is her right,that's what she said.She just asked him if he thought about marriage-he clearly said no-if he loved her (after being in a 9 year relationship)even if he didn't want to get married soon the least he could've done was give her a positive response like "ive been thinking about it.." or "Or id like to think about that for the future" there was none of that-so no,he may not love her-not enough to even consider what she wanted for the future...you do that for the person you love.Steve said that- more or less.
@@Josh-xy3td He's wasting her time. Women are not like men. Men have all the time, women don't. He's wasting her youth and being selfish
A relationship is not one sided, he does not love her.
A man who wants to get married doesn’t need to be asked. He would have talked about it even when you started dating. It would be in his conversations. Like “this is what I want to do when I get married, or the kind of family I wanna raise”. And he would be taking steps towards that. Not steps towards living together till Jesus comes back.
I know it’s painful but you gotta move on. God will help you find your partner. Read Isaiah 34:16.
You better preach
Not in this instance, they started dating as kids. But yeah otherwise
@@fletcher373Even as teenagers, he could've mentioned it for their future. Guy's an energy vampire.
@@fletcher373 have you not heard teenagers talking about their future marriages?? If it’s in his desires he will bring it up
The best comment I’ve read! Thank you for sharing the truth and not leaving God out of the equation. People don’t realize they fail in many areas of their lives- including relationships- because they have left God out.
She should leave. I dated a man for about the same amount of time and despite my bringing up the topic of marriage he never did. Instead he went and married someone else. I wasted my youth on that man and I'm still single today 25 years later.
Sis, I'm sorry that happened, but you may have dodged a bullet. Thank God you didn't marry him.
I feel this. I had two 6 year relationships, neither ended in marriage. The one I married asked me in a year. Yes, both of the other men married someone else in a much shorter time.
I’m sorry you never found “the one” but it is better than “the wrong one” Peace & Blessings.
Wow, so sorry to hear that. How old are u now if u don't mind me asking?
I think thT a man that love a women should at some time at less talk marriage. If he doesn't 't that mean he isn't 't the marriage kind.
@@MaryK-yb8wc I'm 51
In the UK we call this man’s behaviour ‘having your cake and eating it’. He’s getting all the benefits (wink, wink) without giving her any commitment because he’s young, she’s the only girl he’s known and he doesn’t want to be tied down to mortgage, debt, wife, babies - not yet! I was in this situation myself so I can speak to this scenario. She needs to leave him to ponder and make a life for herself, minus him: if he wants her he’ll come forward with an offer - but she may just find someone better!!
Yep. I hope she does.
@@dumfriesspearhead7398My Neighbour in England London are from Portugal there still together 38 year have four children but they never married each other and there very religious there Christian
And that what the Girl in the video Boyfriend want. To love her and be with her for the rest of his life. Have children with her but do it without getting married.
You do not need marriage to prove your love for one another.
My Neighbour in England London are from Portugal there still together 38 year have four children but they never married each other and there very religious there Christian
And that what the Girl in the video Boyfriend want. To love her and be with her for the rest of his life. Have children with her but do it without getting married.
You do not need marriage to prove your love for one another.
@@mrwahibtahri If they were REALLY Christian they'd be married because they're going against one of the fundamental tenets of their faith. So I don't buy that.
Marriage affords legal protection, esp for women and children. She'd be a fool to stay with him without being married.
@dumfriesspearhead7398 They wear the Cross sometimes , Go to Church as munch as they can. They have the cross and three status of Jesus in there home.
Dating from a young age into adulthood is SUCH a waste of time. You cant even explore yourself alone. You dont even know who you are when you are alone.
Your opinion
depends who you’re dating
I agree! Why date if you are not planning on marrying anytime soon? Stay single and enjoy life with friends! Date when you desire marriage. I never see a positive relationship of someone who dated from teen years into adulthood that didn’t end in either divorce or cheating.
He is old enough to have sex but for marriage he is too young. HOW CONVENIENT!
My Neighbour in England London are from Portugal there still together 38 year have four children but they never married each other.
You do not need marriage to prove your love for one another.
@mrwahibtahri You dont need commitment to prove your love for one another?!
Europeans have no values anymore @@mrwahibtahri
@@mrwahibtahri agree! Don’t try to explain it to the rest of the people here 😂
@@welicolepnoMarriage is for security to your family. Love is not needed for marriage
If a man needs an ultimatum, he’s not the one.
He’s focused on his goals and would need her to help him financially attain those goals.
I hope she listened to Steve and kept her dignity
ugh she is so beautiful , she deserves more
My Neighbour in England London are from Portugal there still together 38 year have four children but they never married each other.
You do not need marriage to prove your love for one another.
There most certainly IS such a thing as being “too invested” in a relationship if it’s obvious that it isn’t going anywhere. Cut your losses, and move on. Otherwise, you’ll look back and resent HIM for “wasting” your years.
Yes, agreed!
If he isnt saying yes, he is saying no. Point. Blank. Period. Bye and take care.
The problem is that she is providing a lot of the benefits that used to only be provided by wives. Is she provides attention, devotion, dedicated time, SEX, companionship, etc, without marriage, he has Zero incentive to propose.
Facts. Why buy the cow when you're getting the milk for free.
So explain couples who didn't wait til marriage for sex but still got married.
@@ExceptionalLex they lucked up. There are many who play that game and don't end up married. People make whatever choices they want to make and whatever the outcome is they have to be okay with it. Let's not pretend that most people play house in relationships and end up married. Most will go through several relationships before they finally get the chance to marry while some never get the chance. It is what it is.
@ExceptionalLex I said she was providing a lot of the benefits that only married women used to provide. She wants to be married but she’s still with him and she’s providing those benefits despite his desires and actions being different than hers.
Plus, she also said she’s been with him since she was 15. It’s possible she was a virgin which makes it that much harder for her to leave (if that’s the case). Exchanging spiritual energy with people can emotionally connect a woman to her lover prematurely. You can be with someone for years and not realize you don’t want the same things. It’s ideal to determine if you’re a match and if you both intend to move forward with the same goals before getting intimate and letting your heart and vagina override your logically brain.
🎯
I wasted my youth on a high school relationship and ended up leaving after several years…then I met my husband, dated for 6 months and got engaged then got married 6 months later. Ladies, if he wanted to marry you he would! Also being engaged for 5 years is just as bad as staying for 10 unmarried.🥴🥴 Trust me, the right one will not want to wait that long.
Stringing her along, wasting her time.
She's a placeholder. That's it, that's all. My spouse and I got married in our mid 20s, and we built it from the ground up together. Let that man go so you can flourish and prosper
This is a good way to put it, I like the word usage "place holders," I believe this "place holder" culture needs to stop! Many men do this, if she was the rib he'd be saying baby let's get married. I see bones of my bones and flesh of my flesh let's do this...but in this last day's culture you can forget it! Why buy the cow when you already milked it! 💯
@@Royal_DiademAnd I’ll take it one step further: “men are like: “why buy this cow when there are other cows he thinks he can milk or is milking” 🤮
@@Royal_DiademMy Neighbour in England London are from Portugal there still together 38 year have four children but they never married each other.
You do not need marriage to prove your love for one another.
@@klickingkayasmr7585My Neighbour in England London are from Portugal there still together 38 year have four children but they never married each other.
You do not need marriage to prove your love for one another.
My Neighbour in England London are from Portugal there still together 38 year have four children but they never married each other.
You do not need marriage to prove your love for one another.
Leave the coward. Not even waiting for Steve's advice.
😂
lol the same thing I said 😂
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
💀💀
What make’s him a coward?
I'm not giving no damn ultimatum to a grown man😂😂 he says no, goodbye!
I wish that woman all the blessings and grace .. !
You both got together very young. Move on, date, enjoy your life. If he is still the one, he will come running. Don’t wait around for anyone.
In the words of Judge Lynn Toler, "Don't ever let a man tell you twice he don't want you." The man clearly doesn't want her and I think she knows this but she's scared to break that tie. She needs to move on because she ain't getting any younger.
My Neighbour in England London are from Portugal there still together 38 year have four children but they never married each other.
You do not need marriage to prove your love for one another.
@@mrwahibtahri Keep telling yourself that.
@@accountingmanager5964 why you tell that to me
She does a thousand times. Same comment under every other comment
As someone that has been in a long term relationship in my 20s and now out of it and happily married.....don't waste your time. You're lucky, you're 25. Don't waste your youth on someone whose not on the same page as you because trust me there are guys out there that want the same things as you.
My Neighbour in England London are from Portugal there still together 38 year have four children but they never married each other.
You do not need marriage to prove your love for one another.
She's beautiful!
But just a placeholder to her user bf.
If you have been dating for 9 years and don't have a ring
And he wants to buy a house with you
RED flag. He needs your help to finance his home. She needs to 🏃 while she's still young
He's obviously not going to marry her
That logic is so backwards. Marriage isn't this grand and life-fullfilling thing for everybody. If the guy says he wants to buy a house with her, that's literally his way of saying he's all in with her. They have been together for 9 years. Marriage isn't gonna change that. Y'all gotta stop putting your values onto others THAT DON'T FIT THEM and for some reason judge them ON THAT TOO? If that dude wouldn't love her, that relationship wouldn't have lasted for 9 years. Use your head.
He hasn’t grown up - red flag - walk away & move on!!!
@@Tenseiken_You sound like you're 15 years old, the unmarried folks move in and out with new people in their homes all day because they aren't committed
No him buying a home sounds like a step towards marriage. 9 years is long but they were 16. I believe marriage is next on his list. He’s still growing up 😊
@@JamieModelvsDirector He just needs help getting a house. This isn't marriage
9 years: you know you like me, stop that nonsense. She scared because it's been 9 years and that's all she's known and he's too comfortable now. 25 y.o is still young but she got to make a decision NOW. I'm 33 and never let a guy more than 3 years.
Preach!
Then all of a sudden she wants to have a baby, but the dude doesn't think about her needs, her age and her eggs!!! I hate when men waste women's time.
I gave men 12months, then it's next! Even Steve says a man knows in 6months, which is actually true. My husband proposed after 4 months! Men just waste women's time and we have to stand up and not let it continue!
@@whatonearth717 tbh no one is forcing her to stay tho 😬1 year of dating is good 👍🏾glad your hubby proposed quick 🙏🏾💜
I would say don’t give a man more than 9 months once u hit 30 if you notice he’s not discussing marriage in serious manner with u.
Don't Buy large purchases with anyone. Protect what your Building for Yourself. Be Careful. Trust yourself. I can tell you Stories. I have Alot of Regret. Don't Give Yourself to Anyone , only your Children.
I agree
Yes great advice Steve..she wants the relationship on paper and he doesn't. She should not buy a house with this man. He wants what he wants but can't return the favor. He sounds like a control freak who avoiding marriage. She should protect herself and all investments with this dude. Find you a man who not only makes you happy but also wants what you want.
Wow. This is good
👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
Girl he clearly doesn't love you, you're alone in that perfect love only happening in your head and heart sweetie
Where’s her parents? Or support system? Why are they letting her waste her life?
They already said something but she didn't listen and thought she knew better because she's in the relationship, not them. When friends and family are saying something, those who know you best are saying something to help, they care, think on their 2 cents a bit more, especially if they're wise parents/friends who truly care for her.When all her family & friends tell her to let him go, don't remain 'loyal' you have to wonder why they're all giving you that similar advice. They're seeing something you are not for being 'in the relationship'. No one wants her hurt, but to keep going, down the line she will realize she's hurt herself so bad in standing by a man with many red flags.
Young lady? Your guy is saying why BUY THE cow when you getin the milk for-free?.🤦🏾♀️ #WakeTFup
@@chynaajadeit’s literally the same thing
@@chynaajadewho cares. We all know what she meant. We know the saying.
@@chynaajade Typing to fast 🤣🤦🏾♀️
@@peeweecrawford3349 .....Sorry, if I offended you. I hope that you'll have a lovely day.
@@chynaajade Not at All.. Same2u
When they want it they have that ring ready way before you even think about it
That house is for his future wife, and that’s not you. You’re a place holder, and your youth is being used. Move on. Fully and completely. He’s NOT yours. Cry for two weeks and keep it moving. His loss. If a man isn’t marrying you in 12months, 24mnths at most, he’s not yours. End of. We need to stop lying to ourselves. Don’t be used, you aren’t a ‘thing’. No such thing as a long engagement either. Smh. Tactics. Don’t let some dull man waste the time that belongs to someone who actually loves you. Pray, fast, and keep it moving. You’ll be alright.
🎯 EXACTLY 🎯
Nine years? A man knows within 20 minutes of meeting a woman if she's going to be ''the one''.
.. what is this, Disney world?
@@light-water Nope! Men know from the get-go.
Real life is not a movie
@@silentnight9655 Men need to step down off of their pedestal because it is not all about "YOU." It's not just up to "your choosing." You don't have the final say if she is the one. She does. So, you don't know. LOL. No point in asking her to marry you if you just "know."
@@sherriewoods8015 I'm saying that men know when they've met someone rare and special.
I'm female.
Typical man. He keeps the good girl at home to himself. And might be slinging it all over town. Girl, " he's not that into you" continue self love. And let a man that really wants you show up. She really answered her own question!
Oh you know he's slingin' it. Men like that aren't faithful. He's keeping her around until he finds something better.
He needs the well-behaved Woman he doesn’t care about to do all his housework while he cheats with a Woman who can’t wash a dish. Standard male behaviour.
House b4 spouse. He's protecting their future.
I think he’s saying no bc he wants to see what else is out there since he’s been with this girl since teenage years. He will find out the hard way that the grass ain’t greener. He’s gonna regret losing her.
If he regrets losing her because "the grass is greener," then it really shows he's with her to benefit himself. If he regrets losing her, it's from a purely selfish place of wanting to use her.
At 3:40 "Men don't do NOTHING without a reason" Steve said a word. I wish more women knew this.
Men have better boundaries and are far more pragmatic and operate totally in their own self interest.
If they break up (which they should btw) he'll find another woman, marry her and start having kids quicker than Roadrunner.
This gf is merely a placeholder. Dude is busy stealing her youth, beauty and all of the services she's providing him with no commitment on his part.
It's a bad deal; she needs to move on pronto.
At least the guy honestly said no. She should move on.
My Neighbour in England London are from Portugal there still together 38 year have four children but they never married each other.
You do not need marriage to prove your love for one another.
@@mrwahibtahri u are really gung ho about this commenting on every thread
Yea I report the spam comments
I agree with Steve on this one! A man doesn’t invest in something unless he wants to and he need her for a house but he doesn’t want to get married. Now what kind of sense does that make!! Think about it!! I know it’s been a long time with him but he’s not ready and she needs to give him and ultimatum. If he wants to be with her he will marry her. Stop play house with these men ladies. A man is only going to do what you allow him to do!! I hope she uses good wisdom and judgment.
Thank Goodness she didn’t get pregnant! 🤰🏽 Whew! The love of your youth may not be the same for your maturity. Why people grow apart. I think they’ve grown but he wants he to hang and feed and find his dreams while ignoring hers.
Stop nudging. Don’t beg anyone to be with you.
She is a placeholder until he finds “the one”. Since she is his high school sweetheart he is not going thinking that much ahead. Soon as he finds someone else he is going to end it. No matter how much you love someone it’s more beneficial to walk away and focus on yourself when you don’t have a ring.
💯
She's so pretty. Sweetheart, leave while you still have your beauty. He doesn't want you. You're a placeholder. He was direct. Believe him. Free yourself and live your life... without him. I hope she chooses herself ♥️
I love when males are honest about other males and their BS. Thank you Steve!
U should not be sleeping with him without marriage that’s the word of God .
Absolutely.......most men don't respect women who make themselves available to them sexually. They're getting what they want. Men want a woman who is a challenge.
bingo, it will also help to keep you from developing soul ties with the wrong people, and help to keep your mind clear and focused, so you can see a persons red flags
@@koolsmoothfan yeah it hit me later...because he was her first, he is older and has others.
Bulshit.. My grandmother was a virgin and she was with an alcoholic... Being virgin doesn't make happy marrage.. He can change with years and it can become really bad.. You are delusional... Nothing can garantee you anything, it's all bedtime story.. People change, there is no way to garantee that your virginity will attract god person.. It's delusional...
My grandmother vas virgin and all she had is alcoholic... Being virgin doesn't mean you will get a god guy.. People change, start cheeteing and gambling no matter on your virginity and marrage.. You are delusional...
No sex or any form of sensual intimacy before marriage would solve these problems really quick. People sin and then wonder how is this not working out…
This sounds old-fashioned but we women mustn’t put the cart before the horse! Why give him all the comforts of a wife without the security of that one would have? Without the respect and admiration of a husband? Let him go pay some floozy for “the wife experience”, if that be the case. 💲💄
@@yvettemarshallTWN…❤ old fashion or not, it works😉 l’m a highly impatient person and l don’t mince words. Any man that asked me out l told them l was dating for marriage prospects. With my husband l told him l didn’t intend to sleep with him until our honeymoon and if he had a problem, he could walk. We didn’t see each other for about 3 weeks or maybe longer. When he returned he proposed and we married a couple of months later. 27 Years and counting❤❤❤❤
Exactly. Why would they buy the cow when they can get the milk for free. We women need to pull the handbrake on sex! Make men respect us because we respect ourselves.
Amen 🙌🏼 amen 🙌🏼 amen 🙌🏼
I wish every woman understood this. Women wonder why the man is with them for years but don't put a ring on it, they don't need to, they got a wife without any legal commitment.
A man who really wants to marry you won’t have you waiting years iam not playing house with no man doing things a wife should do for him and we not married
Nope. No maam!
lets talk about a realistic scenario here, he finds his wife about to be attacked by another man, should he A: Step up and defend her by potentially risking his life or B: Do nothing seeing as she isn't his wife and therefore doesn't get the wife protection? Women need to realize that they are getting the benefit of A by being a partner of a man irregardless of "wife" status. just as much as a man should be getting the benefit of wifely duties irregardless of "husband" status. Men will put their lives on the line even when they have started dating, some women will say she shouldn't reciprocate any nurturing values a woman brings until married?? how silly.
He is happy to have you in his back pocket. Meanwhile something better might come along. Walk away and get YOUR something better.
She's afraid to be single so she is hanging on in hopes that he will propose to her
I know girls from highschool that didn't have enough confidence to stand on their own, and told me they didn't want to be alone, so they went from boyfriend to boyfriend so they could have no year gaps of "singleness" (which helps you learn about yourself,) and always say I have a man. Well ... 🤦♀️
Said truth, the vast majority of wedlock breakers are cohabiting, women and men in the media, as females be braggin' about "I have a man" yet are settling. As the SIN rises to the ceiling and hits the fan!!" SMH, "Last day's culture."
These are not biblical relationships and TMH God knows it. Only a remnant 🙏
I know girls from highschool that didn't have enough confidence to stand on their own, and told me they didn't want to be alone, so they went from boyfriend to boyfriend so they could have no year gaps of "singleness" (which helps you learn about yourself,) and always say I have a man. Well ... 🤦♀️
Said truth, the vast majority of wedlock breakers are cohabiting, women and men in the media, as females be braggin' about "I have a man" yet are settling. As the SIN rises to the ceiling and hits the fan!!" SMH, "Last day's culture."
These are not biblical relationships and TMH God knows it. Only a remnant 🙏
🎯
The fact that he wants to buy a house means that he's thoughtful, financially stable and would make it throughout the wedlock. But then since he has never ever talked about it or is not in his plans, it's clear that he doesn't intend spending the rest of his life with this young lady. The lady will realise she's wasted her time once they go pathways🤞
Unless it's her money lol He might be thinking she is going to be a big part of the house purchase, so he needs her for that. If she's working and has her s*t together then he probably sees her as an asset at the moment.
A smart man doesn’t need nudges and ultimatums he knows what he has 😊
Ugh Steve I needed you like 8 yrs ago😢 some of us never had them and need Dad talks
Why CANT she see other men while they aren’t together? If he doesn’t want to marry her, she needs to find someone who will! He wants her to help him pay his mortgage.
Right we single until we are MARRIED
Because she needs to finish what she had clean, a clean break, start over, don't mess it up some more. If the next one does the same, cut the losses sooner, run, don't look back and stare, keep going towards the goal of your dreams. She deserves that, she just has to find someone else better that has the same life goals and dreams. Many more fish in the sea, but once you find the catch, keep that gem and don't let them go.
Don't let a man tell you Twice .. he don't want you
0:40 She’s not getting a ring.
Been there, years later and after a zillion tears I realized it was a blessing.
He's seriously playing in her face by telling her he's not thinking about marriage but wants to by a house. Then he says he wanrs to be financially stable--if you aren't financially stable, why would you by a house?? Bye, sir.
🎯 I HOPE SHE TAKE HEED ON YOUR COMMENT🤔 AND RUN🏃🏽♀️🏃🏽♀️🏃🏽♀️🏃🏽♀️
She needs to move on, he will only waste her time and youth. I speak from experience of previously being in a relationship with a guy for 16 years (my first bf), though in my case i was strung along by empty promises of marriage. They wont hesitate if they know you're the one, and it doesnt take that long for them to figure that out. I wish i had just trusted my instincts and left a lot earlier.
I'm a 70-year-old black man. You are absolutely right. A man who is ready to marry doesn't take long to make the choice, and he won't hesitate to lock it down. He won't even want a long engagement. If he's not ready to marry, then he doesn't see the woman he's with as wife material...that's why he's with her. If/when he does get ready to marry, because he's never seen her as wife material in all that time, he's going to look around for other options. Ladies, don't waste your youth. If you're ready to marry, look for a man who is ready to marry _right now._
"Unless the Lord builds the house, they labor in vain who build it..." (Psalm 127:1/NKJV) 🙏🏽
Amen ‼️
Walk away. If not, then run! Do not give a man an ultimatum, neither soft nor hard. Move on with your life. Steve is giving his perspective and he has no idea what having to give an ultimatum to a man will do to you.
Steven is a lil sus - if his wife is his 'dream girl' then why did he cheat on her 3 times? I've also met men who like to "take a woman off the market" simply because he knows she's a good woman and that's always an asset to a man, not because he actually wants 'her'. Steve never talks about that.
Yup that’s what I did. I know some judge this but I set ultimatums after a few years. I said you have 3 months. Was proposed to in 3 days lol. 11 years of marriage down and still happy. ladies put yourself first - always. Because it’s extremely true “if he wants to he will” and that’s them putting themselves first.
She has that 90s lauryn hill look...too beautiful to settle for less
Don’t buy a house with him
He will meet a woman that he values and hill ask her to marry. She’s a place holder
I get placeholder vibes with the situation.
Yes, that's what she is.
Yeah run away. I recently broke up with my ex boyfriend because 7 years and no ring.
Seven years is a long time though.......
That's similar story to me , I've been with my bf for 7 years and no ring. He's given me a pearl ring, which I don't even like pearls and have no idea why he would even get me that... because I'm very specific about what I like. I was married and have been separated for a very long time. Idk what to do at this point
@@TheMingez2 Leave. If he gives you a pearl ring KNOWING you don't like pearls, he certainly doesn't love you; he may not even like you very much and doesn't respect you.
That's no way to be treated in a relationship.
So you've been waiting 7 years just for a ring? Did you make marriage a requirement from the beginning?
@@ieshjust16 Maybe we should find out how old she is - 'cause if they got together as teens - obviously nobody is talking about marriage.
Steve you finna give that man a headache she texting him a paragraph now 😂😂
Good. lol
😂😂😂
Yall women are crazy 😂😂
😂😂😂😂😂😂
🤣🤣🤣
THE BIG MISTAKE IS - Dating only one man her entire life... She needs to date other guys and see how fast this guy puts a ring on it.
Men don't make you guess. They actively choose.
amen sister amen
Be careful of those placeholder relationships. You could wait decades & not get that person to move an inch for you & then watch them walk out the door & move the world for the person they really want. I've seen it happen & the placeholders always seem like they're about to lose their minds.
She is gorgeous!!! 🥰
Some very good advice. If more people followed this guide line this day and age there would be less issues. You need to stand firm with what you need or your happiness is altered and you're not being true to you.
🙄You need to be on the same page, if he don't you can't force a man. It dosent take him years to figure out if he wants to marry you! You seem lovely don't waste your young years Sis!!
She being played so hard she won’t know what hit her when he marries someone else.
Thank you Steve! I'm in that exact spot and I'm exactly doing me.
He is saving his money until he can go and get the woman he truly wants
Exactly!!
When a man tells you he does not want to marry you, believe him. Leave, and please do not look back.
This is why I don’t agree with dating as teenagers. The dating culture has made boys/men lazy and entitled and made women confused and demeaning of their feminine time, energy, and resources.
This girl was hooked as a teen into a pointless circumstance that continued into her adulthood. What a waste of time on her part, while he’s accessed her all these years in exchange for nothing.
Forget him and whatever commitment issues he has. Go live your life before he wastes your best years on wishing and hoping. If you guys break up, he will find the girl of his dreams within 6 months.
Move on and find a husband. Or be a forever “girlfriend”.
9 years? You're 25 years old and you can find someone else to marry! Buy a house! How about buy the ring! If he loves her, put a ring on it!
My guy friend told me before I met my husband that if a guy is truly interested he will commit.
The man does not want to marry you. I understand that you love this man, but the love needs to be mutual. The compromise and commitment needs to be mutual. If you do not want the same thing, then you need to move on. Easier said than done. Many people stay in relationships too long. Your dreams are important too. Do not let it go another 7 or 8 years. Pray about it!