The Green Howls - Elder Song

The light streams over there...Credit to Luis-Bello @ DeviantArt for GIF artwork
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This song is so personal. I wrote the words few years ago and it was my first prayer to the ''consciousness of light fatherhood''. At the time, I had been wrecking my brain trying to intellectualize the father wound I have been experiencing only just to arrive at the ''dark night of the soul''. No amount of thinking, information uptake and sharing was working to lessen my despair internally. The level of felt powerlessness eroded my being... The only way of washing any of this was to find a crack in my armor and feel... but that was not a welcome option.
On that particular day i had completed my mindfulness meditation and was resting in Max Richter's music afterwards. In utter exhaustion I surrendered to not knowing how to overcome anything. It is then a stream of words in a form of prayer came to me whilst ''A Catalogue of Afternoons'' was playing and i started to sing over the composition with tears piling down my face. I had found a way in, there was a chink in the armor and the grief was able to come out.
This composition was one of the very few that I had a vision for, I knew what it had to look like. I adored the folk music intersection with choir supported grace. I cherished the influence of Buddhist and Latvian mythologies combining. I loved the traditional and the modern sounds weave harmonies. I felt connected to something so much greater than me when making this song. The surrender based devotion took away so much heaviness. The elders did step forward and truly helped me.
There are two artists that effectively break me open. One of them is Max Richter and the other is VOCES8. Their work resonates with my nervous system. What I mean by that is that their compositions flow beyond anything rational i know. Their sound has it's own intelligence that acts in such mysterious ways. The connection expands and different perspectives internally are cultivated that lead to greater integration of the ''lost'' in life. Such a reminder of beauty and it's eternal presence in all that is.
Inspiration: Max Richter - A catalogue of Afternoons
• Max Richter - A Catalo...
Lyrics for ''Elder Song''
Last feather velvet
Glides to the heart
Like a dark lonesome night
After a long, long fright.
The elders gather
By the poplar valley.
It's a cold night tonight.
Such a cold night tonight.
Frost blooms early
And shoots wilt.
They tickle my feet,
Rugged Earthly blanket.
Poplar shadows sway
In dull yellow light
Father figures in the dark
Illuminate.
So we pray.
Through songs we pray.
Through songs we pray.
Through songs we pray.
Pray, pray.
This is how we wake up
We hear, we see.
We listen and
Let ourselves be.
Without preconditions,
Without rules,
Without centuries of ghosts
Lost in resentment.
Frost blooms early
And shoots wilt.
They tickle my feet,
Rugged Earthly blanket.
Poplar shadows sway
In dull yellow light
Father figures in the dark
Illuminate.
So we pray.
Through songs we pray.
Through songs we pray.
Through songs we pray.
Pray, pray.
The pain of the fathers beam
Like stars in the evening.
When Mara sits in the glare
The light streams over there...
The light streams over there...
The light streams above the head.