Wow! Everyone needs to hear this message! This message could help free many people from the bondage of guilt. Lord, guide your children who are suffering right now, from an abusive relationship in which they feel they must stay to listen to this message. To somehow find the video or receive the link to this message. Lord, free them from the guilt and give them the peace in knowing that you do not want them to suffer in the name of "faithfulness", "forgiveness", or even because they are a "Christian." Because it's the "Christian" thing to do. The Christian thing to do is forgive as Pastory Ty Gibson so beautifully presented in this message, not necessarily to stay. God bless you, Pastor Ty, and please keep on sharing these beautiful messages with the world🙌🙏❤️
Thnx u sir Ty! What a powerful and beautiful msg. I am "the Abuser" in a relationship, and I've always asked the person I had abused to forgive me and to re-fellowship with him. The guilt of what I've done has kept me from sleeping for almost 10yrs now. I've always wondered why God would always keep this gulf between me and him, and this mssg has made it clear. Now I have renewed vigor to live "the LIFE of the FORGIVEN", I had been forgiven all these yrs. Thank you from the depths of my heart. Now I know how to live the life of the Forgiven. Thank you and God bless you and your family!
This is so necessary to hear- and be repeated. We are so tuned into “feelings” that we have to feel something rather than just “put it over there”. It’s taken me many years to realize that just because I remember what happened- years of abuse- that I hadn’t forgiven him. The memories remain- they are what kept my children & myself safe
Thank you so much for sharing this, Pastor Ty. I never knew this about forgiveness before. Gratefully, God has given me the ability to forgive to the point that I three years ago I moved back to take care of my abuser in his elder years. Guided by God, I actually have been doing what you said about placing him in God's hands and distancing myself emotionally, and physically when needed. And praying for him. I see God working on him. There is hope. I do want him to become someone who can safely live in God's kingdom and be free from what has made him the person he is.
Thank you for explaining this so well. I have thought of this so many times but had not the words to express it out right. Or to even know if I was right in my thinking. I question all of my thoughts and motives. In the past for me these things has happened to me that you spoke about. But I feel God leading me to find answers I've needed a long time ago. I Praise God for this.
Jesus came to set you/us free. If He forgives you /us, but then says I won't trust you again, were you truly forgiven and set free? Jesus is Alive!!! ⛪️💕🏃♂️💨🌍
Thank you so much Pastor, i was struggling with this but i found that I've actually forgiven all my sexual abusers, my father who rejected me and my mother who ill treated and verbally abused for years. Thank you ❤️
I think it's an inevitable emotional process. I think we would feel that way for sure whether how long it is going to be. And it's ok to not to be ready to forgive now. I think it's valid to feel that way and valid to feel shameful even though it's not require for you to be shameful. We are violated and our whole being needs time to respond this way. We are made enjoy righteousness until Satan introduce sin. Your response of anger is a cry out for justice and righteousness.
Thanks so much, I to have taken him in my mind's eye and handed him over to Jesus. It took many times for me doing that before I was at peace . I now have a talk I can share with those come to me with letting go. Blessings to you Ty
I really needed this message. Im happy to see that a pastor in out SDA Church would preach on this subject. I have a question..i know you were talking about the bigs offenses in our lives..does this apply to not so big offenses but that hurt us deeply? What if they never say they’re sorry for something that broke your heart emotionally. Ive forgiven but is it ok to put them aside to prevent the hurt repeating itself. Is it ok to still love that person but need the space to heal from the hurt?
So would this, could this apply to God? Is is possible for Him to forgive but not trust? That all are forgiven, but only the repentant can be trusted with eternal life? Maybe one aspect of the sacrifice of Jesus was to enable God to forgive (reconcile - Rom 5:10) all mankind. Could this even apply to Satan and his angels?
I’m not sure about Satan but consider David whom God had forgiven but when he (David) wanted to build God a sanctuary, God said No, you can’t because you have blood on your hands, that’s how it parallels I think
So sorry to hear this. I sort of understand this kind of anger, I have lost loved ones to violence. But not my sibling. Anger and hatred does something to our character where we can never be at 100% peace with life. Our conscience will hold this over us til we start to want to separate ourselves from anything Holy and Christ like. We may hear sermons and do bible studies,but we know deep in our heart and in the back of our mind that we are not allowing the full blessing of peace that comes from God’s word to settle in our heart. We are not at rest in our heart because of the anger and hatred. This is why Jesus wants us to forgive our enemies, so that when we release the emotions of anger and hatred there will be nothing holding us back from receiving the true rest that only Jesus can give. However, forgiving someone who harmed us or someone we love, is the hardest thing to do. It is like a high mountain in front of us. A mountain standing between us and the true peace of life that Jesus has for us. A mountain that is impossible for us to climb by ourselves. But the good news is that Jesus will move this mountain if you let Him. Faith as small of a mustard seed can move mountains. No need to climb that mountain, let your faith in the faithfulness of Jesus move that mountain. Trust this woman’s judgement in God’s hands and know in your heart that He knows everything. There is nothing hidden in His sight. Release your anger and hatred my sister, let the love of Jesus consume your whole heart until you start to look at this woman as God does, a person tormented by the devil and used by the enemy to do evil, but was never created to do such a horrible thing. You don’t have to start a relationship with this person but you should work on communicating these emotions with God and pleading with Him to move that mountain of unforgiveness. In the end you will have true peace that only can be experienced when we have a clean conscience, cleansed from anger and hatred. In Jesus we have the hope of reuniting with our loved ones who are asleep in Jesus. He is a faithful Savior, Matthew 11:28-30
Amulya, I can't imagine what you have gone through. It must be devastating to lose a sister like that. I have had negative experiences in my life - but nothing like this. I know that God will hold her accountable for what she had done. Forgiveness means handing over the consequences of this to God - He will judge her. You need to release her over to God and distance yourself from her and even thoughts of her. When your mind wanders to her, listen to some Christian music, or read some words aloud. Let your mind get used to other topics, because there is a certain addiction to these negative thoughts about her that will get you stuck - and your mind will keep that lady alive instead of keeping the memories of your sister alive. Your sister would have wanted you to go ahead with your life and not have even one small part of you attached to that lady. Forgiveness is letting yourself go from that bondage to her. There is a saying that "Unforgiveness is like taking a poison pill and expecting the other person to die." For many years, I used to pray - "God, I do not have forgiveness in me, I can only enter into the forgiveness that You have given." It made me rest and relax that even that virtue is from God and not from within me. Today, I am free from that pain and that connection as well. God bless you. I will keep you in my prayers.
I am bit confused, because I keep on running into the aspect of Christian love when I try to reconcile this message to what I understand the bible teaches. Does this mean you can separate forgiveness from love, as defined in 1Cor13:4-8, where love believe(trust) in all things?
This is such a good question and I'm wrestling about this with you. Could it be that Paul specifically went through several descriptions of love so we precisely don't pick only one out of the 13? Yes, love always trusts AND also all the others (not envy, not boast, not proud, ect...) Can't have one without the others. I don't know ...
I am sure you know this and done this. The details of the situation of the mom staying with the father who sexually abuse their girls.... It is demanded by law that a case be made by the police against the father. One can get prison sentence if one do not share the unlawful acts with the needed authorities. I know of a pastor who got 5 years because he didnt disclose the molestation to the authorities. Then one is seen as complicate. I foster kids... We need to do the right thing.
Forgiveness doesnt mean that law and order shouldn't be followed or people shouldn't be given the punishment they must get to protect others in society. Foregiveness is to heal you. Bitterness or hatred will make that that lady not only killed your sister but killed your spirit to. God dont want that. Don't let what happened infect you... Then she got you too. She will get her punishment in this world and the next if she doesn't repent. Its not easy in the beginning but pray for her... To get caught and get her punishment but also to repent and be saved while she still have time. The most wonderful scenes in heaven and on the new earth is when people like those two will meet and hug each other and wash each other's feet. Pray for His strength.
24:37 This is rather confusing to me with Matthew 6:12-15 and John 13:34 and Romans 12:18 in mind. If we are called to love as Jesus has loved, shouldn’t forgiveness include those first two words on the board ? It’s hard to imagine a heaven where Jesus says “your sins are forgiven child… but I’m not fond of you. I won’t trust you or engage with you.” In cases of abuse however, I can see how Romans 12:18 applies. It very well may be dangerous and impossible to live peaceably with certain kinds of abusers and engage with them. Even Jesus had to avoid the Jews for sometime because of the threat to His well-being (John 7:1) Nevertheless, Jesus’ disposition and attitude towards His persecutors involved a longing to restore relationship (Matthew 23:37) Our world is indeed sinful… but I think a forgiveness that prevents us from having the type of attitude that Jesus had towards those who desired to harm Him is incomplete.
Not everyone gets along and should be friends, or in a space of expectation with one another. It doesn't mean that you don't forgive, but maybe the two are just different. I'd say giving someone space to avoid further conflict, abuse, or even sinful situations that might be tempting, that two should be separated to have peace and freedom from each other in a non judgemental fashion.
And yet, once hurtful things and violators are given away and set apart with God, He would eventually replace negative feelings with compassion, healed emotions and easy praying for them. So, in my opinion, yes, Christian forgiveness is not an emotional act, but emotional release (escape of negative emotions) surely will follow.
And its also possible to trust again. If we believe in transformation, we believe in the power of God to change habits and people to become new beings. If the person demonstrates these. Do to others what you would want them do to you. The bible says He who is forgiven much loves the most, so how will they love if they are not given unconditional second chance. However this is not mandatory if you can not, its okey.
Wow! Everyone needs to hear this message! This message could help free many people from the bondage of guilt. Lord, guide your children who are suffering right now, from an abusive relationship in which they feel they must stay to listen to this message. To somehow find the video or receive the link to this message. Lord, free them from the guilt and give them the peace in knowing that you do not want them to suffer in the name of "faithfulness", "forgiveness", or even because they are a "Christian." Because it's the "Christian" thing to do. The Christian thing to do is forgive as Pastory Ty Gibson so beautifully presented in this message, not necessarily to stay.
God bless you, Pastor Ty, and please keep on sharing these beautiful messages with the world🙌🙏❤️
Thnx u sir Ty! What a powerful and beautiful msg.
I am "the Abuser" in a relationship, and I've always asked the person I had abused to forgive me and to re-fellowship with him. The guilt of what I've done has kept me from sleeping for almost 10yrs now. I've always wondered why God would always keep this gulf between me and him, and this mssg has made it clear.
Now I have renewed vigor to live "the LIFE of the FORGIVEN", I had been forgiven all these yrs.
Thank you from the depths of my heart. Now I know how to live the life of the Forgiven.
Thank you and God bless you and your family!
This sermon blew me away. The clearness is a Godsend. Thank you!
This is the VERY best explanation regarding forgiveness, as well as separating from a person who violated oneself.
This is so necessary to hear- and be repeated.
We are so tuned into “feelings” that we have to feel something rather than just “put it over there”.
It’s taken me many years to realize that just because I remember what happened- years of abuse- that I hadn’t forgiven him. The memories remain- they are what kept my children & myself safe
Great teaching! Once I removed myself from a bad relationship peace was mine. No thought evoked any feelings and I know Jesus gave me this peace.
Wow, Ty! Thank you!! This needs to be heard over and over again from the pulpit!
Thank you so much for sharing this, Pastor Ty. I never knew this about forgiveness before. Gratefully, God has given me the ability to forgive to the point that I three years ago I moved back to take care of my abuser in his elder years. Guided by God, I actually have been doing what you said about placing him in God's hands and distancing myself emotionally, and physically when needed. And praying for him. I see God working on him. There is hope. I do want him to become someone who can safely live in God's kingdom and be free from what has made him the person he is.
Thank you for explaining this so well. I have thought of this so many times but had not the words to express it out right. Or to even know if I was right in my thinking. I question all of my thoughts and motives. In the past for me these things has happened to me that you spoke about. But I feel God leading me to find answers I've needed a long time ago. I Praise God for this.
Bless you Ty, thank you for helping me to forgive a hurt in my life. 😇😇
Thank you for helping me understand what forgiveness means! So grateful for your words!
Jesus came to set you/us free. If He forgives you /us, but then says I won't trust you again, were you truly forgiven and set free?
Jesus is Alive!!!
⛪️💕🏃♂️💨🌍
Thank you so much Ps Ty so an intriguing message and kinda heavy staff.God bless you.
Thank you so much Pastor, i was struggling with this but i found that I've actually forgiven all my sexual abusers, my father who rejected me and my mother who ill treated and verbally abused for years. Thank you ❤️
This is such a powerful message!
Regrettably, I do t want him to be in Heaven for the damage he has caused me. I am shameful for feeling like that
I think it's an inevitable emotional process. I think we would feel that way for sure whether how long it is going to be. And it's ok to not to be ready to forgive now. I think it's valid to feel that way and valid to feel shameful even though it's not require for you to be shameful. We are violated and our whole being needs time to respond this way. We are made enjoy righteousness until Satan introduce sin. Your response of anger is a cry out for justice and righteousness.
Thanks so much, I to have taken him in my mind's eye and handed him over to Jesus. It took many times for me doing that before I was at peace . I now have a talk I can share with those come to me with letting go. Blessings to you Ty
Very true 👍 siblings are effected by good and bad that happens in eachothers lives...
Your messages are deep,and awesome! Amen, keep them coming.
Powerful and timely!
💯. People need to hear this... ❤️
Thank you Pastor Ty...it helped me alot to understand forgiving better
Very freeing
Wonderful message.
Praise God
Thanks Ty. So many get that wrong.
I'd also like to add or remind that the verse also clearly states "IF" which is a condition on that forgiveness to even start!
I really needed this message. Im happy to see that a pastor in out SDA Church would preach on this subject. I have a question..i know you were talking about the bigs offenses in our lives..does this apply to not so big offenses but that hurt us deeply? What if they never say they’re sorry for something that broke your heart emotionally. Ive forgiven but is it ok to put them aside to prevent the hurt repeating itself. Is it ok to still love that person but need the space to heal from the hurt?
Curious of what advice is given through our churches writings? Thanks
Is it viable to forgive yourself for how you treated yourself?
is it possible to forgive someone in your heart but without actually having to meet up with them and tell them in person ?
So would this, could this apply to God? Is is possible for Him to forgive but not trust? That all are forgiven, but only the repentant can be trusted with eternal life? Maybe one aspect of the sacrifice of Jesus was to enable God to forgive (reconcile - Rom 5:10) all mankind. Could this even apply to Satan and his angels?
I’m not sure about Satan but consider David whom God had forgiven but when he (David) wanted to build God a sanctuary, God said No, you can’t because you have blood on your hands, that’s how it parallels I think
One lady plot for my sister's death and my sister passed now I'm not able to forgive her it's disturbing my brain please give some light on this.
So sorry to hear this. I sort of understand this kind of anger, I have lost loved ones to violence. But not my sibling. Anger and hatred does something to our character where we can never be at 100% peace with life. Our conscience will hold this over us til we start to want to separate ourselves from anything Holy and Christ like. We may hear sermons and do bible studies,but we know deep in our heart and in the back of our mind that we are not allowing the full blessing of peace that comes from God’s word to settle in our heart. We are not at rest in our heart because of the anger and hatred. This is why Jesus wants us to forgive our enemies, so that when we release the emotions of anger and hatred there will be nothing holding us back from receiving the true rest that only Jesus can give. However, forgiving someone who harmed us or someone we love, is the hardest thing to do. It is like a high mountain in front of us. A mountain standing between us and the true peace of life that Jesus has for us. A mountain that is impossible for us to climb by ourselves. But the good news is that Jesus will move this mountain if you let Him. Faith as small of a mustard seed can move mountains. No need to climb that mountain, let your faith in the faithfulness of Jesus move that mountain. Trust this woman’s judgement in God’s hands and know in your heart that He knows everything. There is nothing hidden in His sight. Release your anger and hatred my sister, let the love of Jesus consume your whole heart until you start to look at this woman as God does, a person tormented by the devil and used by the enemy to do evil, but was never created to do such a horrible thing. You don’t have to start a relationship with this person but you should work on communicating these emotions with God and pleading with Him to move that mountain of unforgiveness. In the end you will have true peace that only can be experienced when we have a clean conscience, cleansed from anger and hatred. In Jesus we have the hope of reuniting with our loved ones who are asleep in Jesus. He is a faithful Savior, Matthew 11:28-30
Amulya, I can't imagine what you have gone through. It must be devastating to lose a sister like that. I have had negative experiences in my life - but nothing like this. I know that God will hold her accountable for what she had done. Forgiveness means handing over the consequences of this to God - He will judge her. You need to release her over to God and distance yourself from her and even thoughts of her. When your mind wanders to her, listen to some Christian music, or read some words aloud. Let your mind get used to other topics, because there is a certain addiction to these negative thoughts about her that will get you stuck - and your mind will keep that lady alive instead of keeping the memories of your sister alive. Your sister would have wanted you to go ahead with your life and not have even one small part of you attached to that lady. Forgiveness is letting yourself go from that bondage to her. There is a saying that "Unforgiveness is like taking a poison pill and expecting the other person to die." For many years, I used to pray - "God, I do not have forgiveness in me, I can only enter into the forgiveness that You have given." It made me rest and relax that even that virtue is from God and not from within me. Today, I am free from that pain and that connection as well. God bless you. I will keep you in my prayers.
I am bit confused, because I keep on running into the aspect of Christian love when I try to reconcile this message to what I understand the bible teaches. Does this mean you can separate forgiveness from love, as defined in 1Cor13:4-8, where love believe(trust) in all things?
This is such a good question and I'm wrestling about this with you. Could it be that Paul specifically went through several descriptions of love so we precisely don't pick only one out of the 13? Yes, love always trusts AND also all the others (not envy, not boast, not proud, ect...)
Can't have one without the others.
I don't know ...
I am sure you know this and done this. The details of the situation of the mom staying with the father who sexually abuse their girls.... It is demanded by law that a case be made by the police against the father. One can get prison sentence if one do not share the unlawful acts with the needed authorities. I know of a pastor who got 5 years because he didnt disclose the molestation to the authorities. Then one is seen as complicate. I foster kids... We need to do the right thing.
Sir I have a doubt
Forgiveness doesnt mean that law and order shouldn't be followed or people shouldn't be given the punishment they must get to protect others in society. Foregiveness is to heal you. Bitterness or hatred will make that that lady not only killed your sister but killed your spirit to. God dont want that. Don't let what happened infect you... Then she got you too. She will get her punishment in this world and the next if she doesn't repent. Its not easy in the beginning but pray for her... To get caught and get her punishment but also to repent and be saved while she still have time. The most wonderful scenes in heaven and on the new earth is when people like those two will meet and hug each other and wash each other's feet. Pray for His strength.
24:37 This is rather confusing to me with Matthew 6:12-15 and John 13:34 and Romans 12:18 in mind.
If we are called to love as Jesus has loved, shouldn’t forgiveness include those first two words on the board ? It’s hard to imagine a heaven where Jesus says “your sins are forgiven child… but I’m not fond of you. I won’t trust you or engage with you.”
In cases of abuse however, I can see how Romans 12:18 applies. It very well may be dangerous and impossible to live peaceably with certain kinds of abusers and engage with them. Even Jesus had to avoid the Jews for sometime because of the threat to His well-being (John 7:1)
Nevertheless, Jesus’ disposition and attitude towards His persecutors involved a longing to restore relationship (Matthew 23:37)
Our world is indeed sinful… but I think a forgiveness that prevents us from having the type of attitude that Jesus had towards those who desired to harm Him is incomplete.
Not everyone gets along and should be friends, or in a space of expectation with one another.
It doesn't mean that you don't forgive, but maybe the two are just different.
I'd say giving someone space to avoid further conflict, abuse, or even sinful situations that might be tempting, that two should be separated to have peace and freedom from each other in a non judgemental fashion.
And yet, once hurtful things and violators are given away and set apart with God, He would eventually replace negative feelings with compassion, healed emotions and easy praying for them.
So, in my opinion, yes, Christian forgiveness is not an emotional act, but emotional release (escape of negative emotions) surely will follow.
Amen!
And its also possible to trust again. If we believe in transformation, we believe in the power of God to change habits and people to become new beings. If the person demonstrates these. Do to others what you would want them do to you. The bible says He who is forgiven much loves the most, so how will they love if they are not given unconditional second chance. However this is not mandatory if you can not, its okey.