Eddie Izzard "Machines That Lie" Sketch from Glorious

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  • Опубліковано 10 гру 2024

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  • @theemmjay5130
    @theemmjay5130 3 роки тому +47

    "And a cassette with no holder" Which is, of course, Queen's Greatest Hits.

    • @valdavis5361
      @valdavis5361 3 роки тому +4

      And right now I have a cd in mine, no holder, Queen's very Best! Lol. Love this man!

    • @immortaljanus
      @immortaljanus 2 роки тому

      @@valdavis5361 CD? You're growing old, mate.

  • @The4thSandersonSister
    @The4thSandersonSister 2 роки тому +22

    So many of these live rent free in my head at all times.

    • @GafferPerkele
      @GafferPerkele 6 місяців тому +1

      The awkward moment when you have a good comedy sketch running in your head and everyone around start to wonder why you laughing.

  • @peterlawrence738
    @peterlawrence738 Рік тому +9

    Astonishing…as fresh today as it was then…

  • @abbywheeler9025
    @abbywheeler9025 3 роки тому +59

    I love this magnificent Human being.

  • @MN-tf4ek
    @MN-tf4ek 3 роки тому +21

    I remember the first time I got this on dvd....I had to keep pausing it while I replayed bits / caught my breath / went to the loo...it must have taken me 3 hours to watch......still as funny today,

  • @Rogjp
    @Rogjp 11 років тому +56

    Eddie Izzard is absolutely brilliant. Genius.

  • @TALKCalgary
    @TALKCalgary Рік тому +2

    Brilliant comedian emulated by many, matched by none.

  • @AddFilmmedia
    @AddFilmmedia 4 роки тому +16

    Love the hoddddoddddodddo! ❤

  • @Zaft_K
    @Zaft_K 3 роки тому +16

    I lived briefly in an apartment with that shower dial. And laughed every time I plastered myself against the wall.

  • @Nyogira
    @Nyogira 2 роки тому +14

    Grass goes "Oh for fck sake."
    Childhood memories with pushmepullyou lawnlaydowner..

  • @roohamm2456
    @roohamm2456 3 роки тому +27

    2021.. they STILL lie.

    • @GretalRabbit
      @GretalRabbit 3 роки тому +3

      If anything they lie more now.

  • @TNT-km2eg
    @TNT-km2eg 2 роки тому +2

    Gotta love him

  • @georgebooth946
    @georgebooth946 3 роки тому +11

    I don't think he's as good now but this is when he was the best stand up in the business, Circle and Glorious being my favourites.

  • @buildtherobots
    @buildtherobots Рік тому +8

    I could listen to Suzy Eddie Izzard imitate machines whirring forever

  • @davidstewart5811
    @davidstewart5811 3 роки тому +4

    Oh God, "Glove death" I about shit my pants. What a special human being. Love this guy.

  • @GrimDarkness1972
    @GrimDarkness1972 2 роки тому +2

    Pure genius!

  • @katieoreilly3478
    @katieoreilly3478 3 роки тому +27

    lol me and my grandma (86) still do the "he's your grandad too?!" line as she always refers to my grandad as "grandad". I don't even know if she knows it's from this

  • @Pennsyltucky84
    @Pennsyltucky84 3 роки тому +19

    I can't understand why she doesn't have more views

    • @Pennsyltucky84
      @Pennsyltucky84 3 роки тому

      @@rogermagnus7312 spambot

    • @Pennsyltucky84
      @Pennsyltucky84 3 роки тому

      @Nathan Tony spambot replying t a spambot

    • @Pennsyltucky84
      @Pennsyltucky84 3 роки тому +1

      @@rogermagnus7312 actually, spambot admitting to a crime. good one.

    • @ShockedBones
      @ShockedBones 11 місяців тому

      He

    • @MySerpentine
      @MySerpentine 8 місяців тому

      @@ShockedBones I think she realized she was trans a few years ago, so . . .

  • @kohlemainen
    @kohlemainen 3 роки тому +3

    Timeless beauty. Brilliant

  • @leemuz73
    @leemuz73 3 роки тому +2

    Legend

  • @scrunts666
    @scrunts666 2 місяці тому

    He never failed to make laugh :D

  • @TubeMebro
    @TubeMebro 13 років тому +11

    I love the bit at 3:48 where he talks about toasters lol XD

  • @tomitstube
    @tomitstube Рік тому

    what a creative mind.

  • @dynomar11
    @dynomar11 3 роки тому +7

    Lawnmower jokes, Iconic.

  • @Gratitudejoy21
    @Gratitudejoy21 3 роки тому +2

    'and a map of Belgium' 🤣🤣🤣👌🙏from Belgium

  • @pheeson
    @pheeson 13 років тому +6

    The part about the showers is sooo fuckin true
    LOL

  • @AmiUnhinged
    @AmiUnhinged 11 місяців тому

    Eddie, i was having a goosey gander at Aden in Yemen! It looks so beautiful like the sun always shines on the hugely vivid azure ocean, and the teeny tiny canoes sort of bobble up and down in the bay and the historical architecture a bit like a buddhist version of America. Even the trashed up sea-eroded bas relief on the beach looks eloquently sophisticated and sun-kissed . I'm sure my friends would be green with envy if they knew. I saw a trailer for the new Dune Movie, thinking of you. Where i live is a bit wind-and-wuthering to be honest. There's this pet like...half a gale that swings in off the north Atlantic and it soughs atmospherically in the eaves in the night and glowing silver clouds scud over the huge slightly greeny yellow luminous moon in the winter

    • @AmiUnhinged
      @AmiUnhinged 11 місяців тому

      My neighbourhood thinks it is so gothic and dangerous but really it's only smoke and mirrors- once I was walking to the shop and I saw two grey cars trashed up on the verge like it had been a collision- and the doors had popped open and the metal creepily crumpled anyway the drivers were nowhere to be found, all up the one road to the woods around the hotel and the other way to the pub there was nobody...and dozens of places anyone could have been hiding in the twilight . My hackles were all up like a scaredy cat >.>

    • @AmiUnhinged
      @AmiUnhinged 11 місяців тому

      Anyway it was fine and it turned out no vampires were lurking in the dark in the pyo raspberry greenhouse

    • @AmiUnhinged
      @AmiUnhinged 11 місяців тому

      Fingers? What about crossed knitting needles?

    • @AmiUnhinged
      @AmiUnhinged 11 місяців тому

      That whole season they specialised in really delicate fuscia in a lovely rainbow of colours but mostly this deep pink. I used to pretend they were tiny dragons

    • @AmiUnhinged
      @AmiUnhinged 11 місяців тому

      A wild pokeweed started growing in our 800-ish year old graveyard next to the Totally Gothic Chapel Or Whatever, anyway it's been quite hardy and bushed all over that corner like fake blackberrys that taste of pen ink. "This is cartoon fruit!?what!?" But over the fence are apples right if you really care but I don't: it's a lot of effort for crab apples and I think I might be more thirsty of jumping the cemetery wall.
      Anyway so I come home, the poke is everywhere I look and the back cemetery wall fell down, apparently apropos of nothing. 😮 I thought the zombies had escaped. Nothing else had fallen over except a jar of pink dahlias up the other side.

  • @mccloysong
    @mccloysong 3 роки тому +3

    Shower temperature truth 6:15

    • @henbane2247
      @henbane2247 2 роки тому

      That's what I was looking for, thanks!

  • @jackmill99
    @jackmill99 11 років тому +11

    "Nooooo!!!" *sigh "glove death"

  • @finlaybiddlesden2426
    @finlaybiddlesden2426 2 роки тому +2

    Crying with laughter at this, so true, I saw Eddie live a few times but after a while he lost it and he got complacent, the last gig I went to I walked out it was so shit….!

    • @jasonbarron3047
      @jasonbarron3047 2 роки тому

      Really? How come why is he so shit now mate?

  • @luigi1456
    @luigi1456 2 роки тому +5

    I have gloves in the glove box because of this sketch 🤣

  • @christopherwellman2364
    @christopherwellman2364 3 роки тому +7

    lol I specifically put gloves in my glove compartment in my new car, the first time I've had a car in years

  • @do3807
    @do3807 2 роки тому +1

    Definitely an apple core that lived in the old family car

  • @MySerpentine
    @MySerpentine 8 місяців тому

    Terry Pratchett had a book about why Death really shouldn't have a combine harvester. It was great.
    "What shall the harvest hope for, if not for the care of the reaper-man?"

  • @sands7779
    @sands7779 2 роки тому +3

    Smelling the burnt toast from the lying toaster as I watch this having failed 1 1/2 times trick.

  • @kevanbrown7620
    @kevanbrown7620 3 роки тому +2

    "When you're gran called your grandad grandad. He's your grandad too. Are you my sister?"

  • @SilverSpade92
    @SilverSpade92 4 місяці тому

    7:59
    Underrated joke.

  • @n3uro42
    @n3uro42 12 років тому +10

    In 2013, toaster technology is still the same.

    • @Yosser70
      @Yosser70 3 роки тому +2

      No better in 2021! lol

  • @mousermind
    @mousermind 3 роки тому +4

    Use the shower liner as a shield if you're already in and are adjusting the temp.

  • @Masterfox73
    @Masterfox73 12 років тому +5

    that is true about showers LOL

  • @Me-fo1kk
    @Me-fo1kk 3 роки тому +2

    The difference between fantastically hot and fucking freezing is this...👉👈 omg..I had a shower like that.

  • @gumimegpoid9480
    @gumimegpoid9480 11 років тому +5

    Reaper? Lawn mower as a scythe? *cough* Black Butler *cough* Ronald Knox *cough*

  • @matt_cummins28
    @matt_cummins28 3 роки тому +2

    C'est tres bien parce que vrais, n'est pas?

  • @sanym.collins8404
    @sanym.collins8404 Рік тому

    😂😂😂😂😂😂❤

  • @AmiUnhinged
    @AmiUnhinged Рік тому

    Of course it is that! That's what you get for outsourcing to separate companies. Like...lots of people have enough car battery to play a subwoofer in their car (which of course you need for an industry standard White Trash Party) but it's too much power for their tiny cones and they blow up with an ignominous pop.
    It'll be a similar issue. So theyre designing the furnace space, and the laser at separate places in the...university, say. The laser does double plus like an episode of satanic Glee, and the furnace casing is made of One Foot in The Grave. For instance.

    • @AmiUnhinged
      @AmiUnhinged Рік тому

      Then the cladding was graphite (I suggested Granite) so in some regards you could say "doomed from the very first day" and "inevitable catastrophic meltdown" were hovering like a sword of Damocles above them. The pit and the pendulum...of idiots.

    • @AmiUnhinged
      @AmiUnhinged Рік тому

      Lolol better than that? You don't like the 0-100 policy? Ahh. Stage grip switches instead of a variable resistance would be safer right, if what it like, a bunch of Hardstyle drug addicts are operating the machine ^_^ I mean actually idiot proof? Then you have to make a switch system that's password protected ? You could wire in nitrogen cooling emergency refrigeration in yh?over head on a little fuse right? On magnetic polar cooling.

    • @AmiUnhinged
      @AmiUnhinged Рік тому

      I get the feeling like some sort of goo might help me here. I used to love non-water plasma right? Not like...oil which evaporates leaving gritty residue

    • @AmiUnhinged
      @AmiUnhinged Рік тому

      Like...electrolyte silicon or...

  • @Rogjp
    @Rogjp 11 років тому

    The great thing is, it doesn't matter.

  • @PernixUltor
    @PernixUltor 12 років тому +2

    oh yeah no dislikes

    • @Lynnefromlyn
      @Lynnefromlyn 3 роки тому

      Nine years later four saddoes showed up..obviously Jimmy Carr fans.

  • @HesaidSheSaid360
    @HesaidSheSaid360 12 років тому +27

    Judging by your 'critical analysis' of his transvestism, you don't really seem to get the point. Eddie doesn't give a fuck what other people think of him. He wears what he wants, and he's NOT a people pleaser. If people don't like the way he looks, so be it. Their loss. They're missing out on one of the funniest comedians of all time.

    • @tuberlawl
      @tuberlawl 3 роки тому +6

      Perfect way to put it. Some friends will obsess and not get over his appearance and it's plain sad; even slightly shocking when one puts ones guard down. Even more so in a modern era. Another thing they miss is comedians have to get peoples attention as people fail to listen so badly. A good example is Eddie Murphy, not just the tight leather. But he swore a bunch, again looking back that will get peoples attention also. I am a north London liberal so these petty small-mindedness never raised it's ugly head much. Lucky me !! The occasional time with a new potential friend shows those traits it was a good litmus test. So said newbie friend could be no friend of mine or at least try not to judge and change their outlook etc. Ho hum.

    • @mousermind
      @mousermind 3 роки тому +5

      Who are you talking to?

    • @jasonbarron3047
      @jasonbarron3047 2 роки тому

      @@mousermind hahaha I don't think he knows himself mate

  • @DanandDonna1
    @DanandDonna1 Рік тому

    My glove box had scissors, nail file, insurance proof, and repair papers. Still a bit crowded.

  • @akira_ariga
    @akira_ariga 12 років тому +2

    Get a lawn mower? OH HEY RONALD KNOX.

  • @AmiUnhinged
    @AmiUnhinged Рік тому

    I found one of those at Tchernobyl. The thermometer goes to 800°c but you can't run it over 600°c so there's a little red 'whoooa, horsey' block on the needle swing.

    • @AmiUnhinged
      @AmiUnhinged Рік тому

      I ran a training simulator for a nuclear fission power plant (laser activated heavy particle excitation) when the temperature control was like an equaliser on a sound deck. So in my head I turned into sister bliss like this "boop. Boop .boop. Down in the tunnel of your deepest secrets, I sleep next to the precepts you hold most dear-OH F*CK NOT THAT FAR, back it up,"

  • @lordbuss
    @lordbuss 9 місяців тому

    I think Eddie Izzard is officially the standup comedian most similar to Dave Strider.

  • @n3uro42
    @n3uro42 12 років тому +3

    This guys is epic in his brilliance, educated, funny can discuss latin language and carthagenian war battles, or something as simple as a toaster. And make it all hilarious. The transvestistism really hurt his career. He is SO freaking funny, the only reason I cant see him being a household name, is because of video. Even the makeup and earrigns was okay, the short skirts and stillettos that was the knife in the stomach.

    • @PhoenixProdLLC
      @PhoenixProdLLC 3 роки тому +8

      This comment from 7 years ago proves Dunning-Kreuger Effect is alive and well in the average human shmoo.

    • @solox5853
      @solox5853 3 роки тому +1

      @@PhoenixProdLLC what does dunning and kreufer mean

    • @truepeacenik
      @truepeacenik 3 роки тому +2

      @@solox5853
      Maybe...look it up?

  • @CELINExDION
    @CELINExDION 10 місяців тому

    Jesus this is so unfunny, comedy has come such a long way in only 10 years. I’d rather deal with post-post-irony than this awful attempt at rapid fire jokes that only work for the sake of the celebrity on the stage.

    • @PlayNiceFolks
      @PlayNiceFolks 4 місяці тому

      In your mind

    • @PlayNiceFolks
      @PlayNiceFolks 4 місяці тому

      If you're following comedy for a decade.
      You're probably stricken with a bit of the tisms.

    • @PlayNiceFolks
      @PlayNiceFolks 4 місяці тому

      Have you seen his "do you have a flag" bit? I defy you to bring your snootiness against that bit.

    • @CELINExDION
      @CELINExDION 3 місяці тому

      OI M8 U GOT A LICENSE FOR THAT AWFUL HUMOR? TEEHEE