Poundland Father's Day Special | Ashens

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  • Опубліковано 29 лис 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 1,6 тис.

  • @autumnwoodfall4471
    @autumnwoodfall4471 6 років тому +149

    While browsing for a card for my dad, I found this gem
    "Any man can be a father, but it takes a special man to be a dad,
    happy *Father's* Day."

    • @quinntaylor1170
      @quinntaylor1170 Рік тому +21

      Wow! That’s amazing!!! Really says “fuck you!”

    • @TheBearWithOrangeFur
      @TheBearWithOrangeFur 6 місяців тому

      It should be the other way around 😂

    • @lightning214
      @lightning214 Місяць тому

      @@TheBearWithOrangeFur hahaha no shit

  • @BlueThe1up
    @BlueThe1up 6 років тому +678

    "Eat out! Ooh, mum's gonna enjoy that!"

    • @clivelambert-oe7kg
      @clivelambert-oe7kg 5 років тому +27

      atleast i was not the only one thinking it sounded dirty ahah

    • @nua1913
      @nua1913 4 роки тому +14

      ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

    • @brianartillery
      @brianartillery 4 роки тому +4

      'Fnar fnar!'

    • @PandaTamer97
      @PandaTamer97 4 роки тому +7

      ( ͡°( ͡° ͜ʖ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)ʖ ͡°) ͡°)

    • @darkdan3549
      @darkdan3549 2 роки тому +2

      Kills me every time

  • @Chalky.
    @Chalky. 6 років тому +1502

    They really gave Thameslink a good pounding.

    • @qwertyuiop123456168
      @qwertyuiop123456168 6 років тому +132

      An excellent pounding

    • @Valoe7
      @Valoe7 6 років тому +47

      Next gen Corporate warfare

    • @swytchblayd
      @swytchblayd 6 років тому +32

      They didn't even have to release the cybernetic soldiers against them for that, either.

    • @zrobeast
      @zrobeast 6 років тому +11

      This comment made a successful landing.

    • @MrV902
      @MrV902 6 років тому +14

      And then the guy ruined it by being a little crybaby.
      "Bawww we're gonna sue."
      Sue for what? Sit down.

  • @xbustinjieber
    @xbustinjieber 6 років тому +665

    I wonder if the Poundland mascot is called PoundLad. If not it should be.

    • @andymadden8183
      @andymadden8183 5 років тому +9

      Yes, it should be!

    • @spudhead169
      @spudhead169 5 років тому +41

      Nah, "PoundNonBinaryGenderNeutralFluidGayLesbian"

    • @Fede_uyz
      @Fede_uyz 5 років тому +1

      PoundLab*

    • @scallysnix.2975
      @scallysnix.2975 5 років тому +7

      To an American, its all innuendo.

    • @VadersFist95
      @VadersFist95 5 років тому +16

      @@spudhead169 Hmm, Not sure it was necessary to go that far.

  • @Rylohx
    @Rylohx 6 років тому +1063

    *EAT OUT* “Mums going to enjoy that”

  • @Tungsten96
    @Tungsten96 6 років тому +150

    “The day where we celebrate all Dads who went out to get cigarettes and came back with cigarettes.” XDDD best and most accurate description.

  • @MB-qp5gn
    @MB-qp5gn 6 років тому +893

    The end bit....absolute gold. Solid gold. I have never been nor will likely ever have the opportunity to set foot in a Poundland due to location, but I truly salute them, and hope the tweet was shared in record numbers!

    • @Pehmokettu
      @Pehmokettu 6 років тому +49

      I don't live in UK so I have never visited Poundland but after all these Ashens videos I have always wanted to visit Poundland and buy some cheap 'funny' gifts for everyone I love (and hate). :D

    • @MrDachshund99
      @MrDachshund99 6 років тому +9

      For both of you, they're convenience sized to two story shops that sell everything and smells like hardware stores.

    • @cujoedaman
      @cujoedaman 6 років тому +14

      Guys, guys, guys, just go to a Dollar General, same shtick, just different merchandise :P

    • @Chaos89P
      @Chaos89P 6 років тому +3

      cujoedaman Maybe they live in a part of Britain where the Poundlands are in sketchy neighborhoods? Or they live in a country where there is not on-the-cheap Wal*Mart-like store that sells items of variable quality? Dunno. I'd probably end up going to a Dollar General myself if it came to that, not that I usually go to one.

    • @cujoedaman
      @cujoedaman 6 років тому +4

      I'm sure their sketchy areas aren't as bad as some sketchy areas in Detroit or Los Angeles :D

  • @ColpoRosso
    @ColpoRosso 6 років тому +85

    That poundland answer moved me deeply.
    Honor to PROUDLAND

  • @brycevo
    @brycevo 6 років тому +1174

    They are now, ProudLand!

    • @bobman11100
      @bobman11100 6 років тому +15

      Bryce Mckenzie Ihob and proudland

    • @pswitch9553
      @pswitch9553 6 років тому +15

      Mother Poundland ☭

    • @girlsdrinkfeck
      @girlsdrinkfeck 6 років тому +16

      see, thats the proper way to use words like pride and proud ,because u made some kind of achievement , being a gay isnt an achievement lol

    • @herbiehusker1889
      @herbiehusker1889 6 років тому +4

      Neil sounds kind of like a wuss.

    • @Leo_252
      @Leo_252 6 років тому +7

      girlsdrinkfeck look up the definition of pride it also means ‘a feeling of self-respect’.

  • @Lrr_Of_Omikron
    @Lrr_Of_Omikron 6 років тому +320

    How the hell is that brown couch not growing something not natural after all these years and random grossness?

    • @fyrentenimar
      @fyrentenimar 6 років тому +125

      I imagine it's because half of what's been on it kills the other half.

    • @nithia
      @nithia 6 років тому +18

      Because of the Grass Mask

    • @nunyabiz8305
      @nunyabiz8305 5 років тому +15

      How do you know that the couch itself isn't alive after all these years?

    • @VadersFist95
      @VadersFist95 5 років тому +20

      @@nunyabiz8305 Pretty sure he got rid of the original sofa years ago. This sofa is what was growing from all the gross stuff on the original sofa

    • @legobrickabrac
      @legobrickabrac 4 роки тому +3

      @@VadersFist95 He has replaced the sofa multiple times.

  • @Halogeek-zq7yr
    @Halogeek-zq7yr 6 років тому +160

    “Eat out, Mums gonna enjoy that!”
    Did the mighty Ashens jut deliver an innuendo?

  • @izzy4897
    @izzy4897 5 років тому +196

    Go to the Winchester
    Have a pint
    And wait for all this to blow over
    Lovely reference

    • @deadlypotato7953
      @deadlypotato7953 5 років тому +5

      I loved that film

    • @MrPeterhe
      @MrPeterhe 4 роки тому +7

      Yes, and watching this in 2020 with corona virus on the news makes it sound like a good idea.
      Loved the film.

    • @benmccullough3605
      @benmccullough3605 4 роки тому

      Even when they're dead they hate eachother

    • @tiddlewiddle4784
      @tiddlewiddle4784 3 роки тому +2

      hes simon pegg i swear to god

    • @AJPDing
      @AJPDing 2 роки тому

      An excellent reference

  • @michaelwilliams9566
    @michaelwilliams9566 6 років тому +842

    Ashens, this might be the best damn Poundland video to date.
    An Excellent Tat Review.

    • @parallelalpha
      @parallelalpha 6 років тому +11

      Michael Williams no it’s the one with the mini garbage can.

    • @KamiNoBaka1
      @KamiNoBaka1 6 років тому +9

      I would agree with you, if not for the Thameslink thing.

    • @geoserenity
      @geoserenity 6 років тому +4

      Michael Williams well, it's certainly not a bit thameslink...

    • @AlmightBlackDragon
      @AlmightBlackDragon 6 років тому +5

      Chef Excellence approved *chimes the Chef Excellence Theme*

    • @jasperpulleine9655
      @jasperpulleine9655 6 років тому +1

      Proudland*

  • @Atzy
    @Atzy 6 років тому +192

    The "wine glas and fork" symbol doesn't mean dishwasher safe, it means it's made from materials that are intended to be in contact with food

    • @thacooltiger373
      @thacooltiger373 4 роки тому +12

      I'd be concerned if my 50-pack of Forks weren't sterile

    • @michellegoede2258
      @michellegoede2258 4 роки тому +10

      @@thacooltiger373 they most definitely aren't sterile

    • @JonatasAdoM
      @JonatasAdoM 3 роки тому +4

      @@thacooltiger373 I see you've never been to Forkland. An entire civilization on a fork.

  • @joe74509migo
    @joe74509migo 6 років тому +306

    In Japan, the rail company had to publicly apologize for 20 seconds delay

    • @OdaSwifteye
      @OdaSwifteye 6 років тому +27

      God damn are those people wound up.

    • @TheGoldenDunsparce
      @TheGoldenDunsparce 6 років тому +68

      It wasn't even a delay, but actually an apology for leaving 20 seconds EARLY

    • @Violaderre
      @Violaderre 6 років тому +3

      Hello I love your little dog!

    • @dr58885
      @dr58885 6 років тому +30

      Ed Gein akihito did apologize publicly to both the US and China, though the chinese are still mad he didn't send a letter

    • @Juggling_necromancer
      @Juggling_necromancer 6 років тому

      username checks out

  • @rachelmarieLMT
    @rachelmarieLMT 6 років тому +308

    Lol i think the phrase "nick the chips" is the most British thing I've ever heard.

    • @caughtinthestars
      @caughtinthestars 6 років тому +14

      Nope! The most British thing you will hear is Eddie Redmayne saying "bugger"

    • @nslouka90
      @nslouka90 5 років тому +1

      Sounds like something i'd do!

    • @Elder74
      @Elder74 4 роки тому +1

      What about "bits and bobs"

  • @acidhelm
    @acidhelm 6 років тому +1263

    Mom's gonna enjoy that!

    • @OGskunkMASTA
      @OGskunkMASTA 6 років тому +83

      acidhelm I died laughing😂

    • @unlokia
      @unlokia 6 років тому +37

      Except... you didn't...

    • @louispenn9253
      @louispenn9253 6 років тому +108

      unlokia Are you a sad onion? Who hurt you?

    • @sgtwolf7391
      @sgtwolf7391 6 років тому +50

      acidhelm
      And the kids can go to the pub.
      And wait for this to all blow over.

    • @eggsack
      @eggsack 6 років тому +4

      acidhelm
      Ikr.. Totally lost it!

  • @suspiciousspaghetti8579
    @suspiciousspaghetti8579 6 років тому +39

    I saluted Poundland as a single tear streaked down my face

  • @sirkowski
    @sirkowski 6 років тому +177

    Poundland is SAVAGE.

    • @blobbem
      @blobbem 6 років тому +22

      +hidefanlovely Eh, Wendy's got stale fast (ironic, considering fast food is immortal). At least Poundland is calculated in their weaponised responses; only acting in defence and doing so in a matter of passive aggressiveness that encapsulates British society.

    • @HyperSonicSquall
      @HyperSonicSquall 6 років тому +13

      they're both quite fitting. wendy's is like a smarmy teenager who's always making sarcasm every minute of the day.
      while poundland is an aged brit with this dry and callous wit that they bust out with rare but perfect timing

    • @IanC14
      @IanC14 6 років тому +3

      sirkowski I didn't know you were on UA-cam!

  • @iamdb1990
    @iamdb1990 6 років тому +238

    the giant barcode thing is to make it quicker to scan, it's literally just convenience reasons, I've heard

    • @Skashe
      @Skashe 6 років тому +36

      It really is. I work in a Lidl and the giant barcodes are a godsend when you need to be quick on scanning items.

    • @iamdb1990
      @iamdb1990 6 років тому +22

      Skashe fair enough, my brother works in Aldi, and said that's what it was, but he also lies and jokes a lot so nobody can ever fully be sure if it's true lol

    • @Chris-im3ys
      @Chris-im3ys 6 років тому +1

      Heard Ashens say that, hit CTRL+f, instantly typed barcode, enter and here you are.

    • @nerdydev
      @nerdydev 6 років тому +1

      this is the reason exactly. also if you go to some shops. aldi for example they will have a barcode on all sides of a box so you don't have to find it

    • @DragonNexus
      @DragonNexus 6 років тому +5

      Meanwhile on the oppsoite side of things, barcode colour can matter too. Black obviously gets picked up well, but other colours can work.
      Except red. So when Safeway decided to colour code the barcodes to their cream, blue for double, green for whipping, purple for clotted and red for single, it became a pain in the arse to scan the buggers in. Eventually all the cashiers ended up memorising the numbers and just typing them in.

  • @thrilltoth
    @thrilltoth 6 років тому +134

    I bought one of the telescopic forks ages ago but it was sold as a back scratcher, oh Poundland

    • @IanC14
      @IanC14 6 років тому +3

      Roderick storey butt scratcher!

    • @beelzibubbles
      @beelzibubbles 6 років тому +3

      I bought an extendable fork with my first wage packet, at Borders. Should have waited another 13 years, it was 9 bloody quid (no wonder they closed down).

  • @sfighter0085
    @sfighter0085 6 років тому +131

    Fun special. Pretty cool to see "Poundland" actually respond to a tweet that seemed to have one of dumbest comparisons to date. Have to give them props there. Also those "Tool Pens" made me think of stuff from "Little Tykes", "Playschool", and "Fisher-Price". Poundland always has the greatest cheap tat. :D

  • @jakebartlett3054
    @jakebartlett3054 6 років тому +78

    Love that Shaun of the dead reference.

    • @fujitamakos8884
      @fujitamakos8884 6 років тому +24

      just adds even more to the humor of everyone thinking stuart is simon pegg.

    • @annapocalypsezero4719
      @annapocalypsezero4719 6 років тому +14

      Well, you never see them both in the same room together do you?

    • @JustAskMeTV101
      @JustAskMeTV101 6 років тому +1

      Too bad Ashens seems to hate Edgar Wright for some reason

    • @kevinpatrickcarey3741
      @kevinpatrickcarey3741 2 роки тому

      @@fujitamakos8884 ya gotta admit they could almost be twins in dim lighting

  • @ACESN1
    @ACESN1 6 років тому +11

    Yesss I love the witty way Poundland responds to people trashing them good for them 🙌🏼

  • @luvz2reed
    @luvz2reed 6 років тому +210

    The first symbol on the mug means food-safe.

    • @oiwithyou
      @oiwithyou 6 років тому +42

      luvz2reed I would definitely hope so!

    • @Pehmokettu
      @Pehmokettu 6 років тому +9

      I have to admit that for a long time I thought that symbol meant 'dishwasher safe' and because of that I have ruined couple of good looking mugs and some other dishes. :/

    • @mixerfistit5522
      @mixerfistit5522 6 років тому

      Pehmokettu yeah if you look closely you'll even see it on all kinds of crappy plastic containers like the semi-disposable takeaway tubs

    • @sleepyhead6726
      @sleepyhead6726 6 років тому

      How reassuring.

  • @wisteela
    @wisteela 6 років тому +38

    Never take on the might of Poundland. Unless you are Ashens.

    • @Arbron
      @Arbron 4 роки тому +2

      I've been marathoning these Poundland specials and I don't get the feeling Ashens "hates" Poundland. He just thinks of it as a charming little nephew whom he takes the piss out of, but *woe betide* anyone else who thinks they can do the same.

  • @lunarmagoo
    @lunarmagoo 6 років тому +42

    Hi Stu.....my father worked in retail along time ago and your vids make me think of him a lot. He passed away in 2014 and I can remember just before he died he told me a story! I paid him a visit on uk Father’s Day and he said I have something very important to tell you. I looked at him with a confused gawp on my face when he took a small wooden box from under the pillow on his armchair. What was in this box? I’d never seen it before in the 43 years I’ve been here? I used to go searching the house when I was younger but I’d never come across this before in my life!? He started to fill up and said to me in a deep somber voice....”son....this is for you!..I don’t have long left with you on this earth but whatever happens to me, this is my legacy to you. I give you the source of my wisdom which has been passed down through my fathers fathers and generations before. This will help you love, choose, decide and most importantly...understand!” I was enthralled at this point and hung on every word he uttered. He went on..”Son..I’m so proud of you! I could not have wished for a more complete seed to live the name on in our history” he started to cry and the tears ran down both mine and his cheeks! I took the box and 2 days later he passed away peacefully in his sleep. The devastating news of my fathers demise was a hard letter to deliver but being the only son I felt it was my duty. A couple of days after the funeral I was clearing my dads clothes and I found the box. I opened it and inside was a small bit of paper folded up. I looked at the paper with glazed eyes and unfolded it. It pencil was written the word......”pissflap”..........obviously he was an absolute Gonk! Nevermind! I was adopted anyway! Stay lucky you name sharer! 👍🏻🐎

    • @kahe4237
      @kahe4237 6 років тому +8

      That story made me smile. Because he had fun until the end.

    • @sekkusupisutoruzu
      @sekkusupisutoruzu 6 років тому +4

      HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA DADS ARE THE BEST

    • @defrozendonut8715
      @defrozendonut8715 6 років тому +1

      I wann do the same thing when I die your dads amazing

  • @spark7620
    @spark7620 6 років тому +24

    My respect for poundland has increased

  • @Ashurman666
    @Ashurman666 6 років тому +35

    Well bloody hell, Poundland is savage AF

  • @SnapshotOfASoul
    @SnapshotOfASoul 6 років тому +108

    My dad didn't come back with cigarettes....
    He smoked them all.

  • @CallMeWiggles
    @CallMeWiggles 6 років тому +55

    "Eat Out.. Mums gonna like that one!" DEAD

  • @asummerday4448
    @asummerday4448 6 років тому +5

    That message from Poundland was simply amazing

  • @EpsilonKnight2
    @EpsilonKnight2 6 років тому +176

    ThamesLink couldn't even fucking spell their tweet correctly all the way through.

    • @TheGoldenDunsparce
      @TheGoldenDunsparce 6 років тому +38

      Probably too shaken up from that amazing Pounding

  • @tucker4182
    @tucker4182 5 років тому +3

    I have watched almost every video you’ve made and I need to say the commentary in this is perfect. The pound land story is great and from San Diego I am saluting the brand. How cool and astute to fire back so eloquent and condescending. Loved it. Keep up the great work. If I’m ever in London I’ll buy the first round.

  • @artinyyk
    @artinyyk 6 років тому +21

    Respect to Austin Cooke/Poundland for calling out ThamesLink’s bullshit in such a respectful while destructive manner, even backing himself up with references.
    Can we just give ThamesLink’s rail contract to Poundland already? It’ll be lovely to get reasonable service for cheap on the train again.

    • @TheHutchy01
      @TheHutchy01 3 роки тому

      I'm not sure this government could give a contract to anyone as competent as Poundland. Not unless there was a giant opportunity for embezzlement.

  • @Lilly_Belle
    @Lilly_Belle 6 років тому +53

    Jesus Christ, Mr. Cooke. That was necessarily brutal.

  • @22MewDragon
    @22MewDragon 6 років тому +46

    I gave my dad a copy of Attack of the Flickering Skeletons for father's day

  • @astral_plane_crash
    @astral_plane_crash 6 років тому +3

    Thank you for being the father I've never had, Stuart.

  • @makomk
    @makomk 6 років тому +29

    The giant barcodes are something Aldi came up with to speed up their cashiers, and I guess other stores are copying it now.

    • @uberfuzzy
      @uberfuzzy 6 років тому +6

      Also barcodes on (almost) every surface. The cashiers can just grab and swipe without looking or fumbling it will work, GREATLY speeds up service.

    • @IanC14
      @IanC14 6 років тому +1

      makomk giant barcodes are a godsend honestly.

  • @Cholez_
    @Cholez_ Рік тому +4

    This many years later and still trains in England haven't got any better 😔
    As a train fanatic from England the bit at the end hits deep and I don't even live anywhere in London (it's not just those guys that have this sort of service)

  • @SLKibara
    @SLKibara 6 років тому +162

    Thank God.
    I was worried you weren't gonna post a Father's Day video.

    • @katanarama1
      @katanarama1 6 років тому +7

      In The Mind of Kibara he's not UA-cam, he actually likes dads. 😂

  • @Sparrow9612
    @Sparrow9612 6 років тому +37

    Telescoping fork > backscratcher

  • @IamSamOneElse
    @IamSamOneElse 6 років тому +44

    The 50fps really enhances the Ashens experience

    • @MichiosGraphics
      @MichiosGraphics 6 років тому +4

      Wish it was 1080p49

    • @unlokia
      @unlokia 6 років тому +2

      You're crazy - 50fps is 2013 news - 60fps+ is where it's at now.

    • @MichiosGraphics
      @MichiosGraphics 6 років тому

      unlokia video only allows 720p50 and 1080p50, odd that it's not 60...

    • @unlokia
      @unlokia 6 років тому

      Eh? I have LOTS of videos on my channel which were shot 1080p60 and display in that, also.

    • @cubbychambers
      @cubbychambers 6 років тому +8

      If he used 60fps we'd most likely see his lights flickering since the UK's power runs at 50hz(aka a cycle of power hits the lights and illuminates it 50 times per second) and they would be out of sync.

  • @-Patorikku
    @-Patorikku 6 років тому +10

    Giant barcodes are implemented for easier scanning at the tills, easier scanning = less time scanning = less queues = less staff required at once, another money saving technique so everything in poundland stays a pound

  • @JustSiobhan
    @JustSiobhan 6 років тому +11

    In the Chester Poundland, an old lady walked into the large store front window and split her head open, blood EVERYWHERE. The staff looked after her and cleaned up the blood. She was ok thank God, even managed to buy what she went in for. Top notch.

    • @strangekat2840
      @strangekat2840 6 років тому +1

      DirtRich the staff in poundland are actually lovely. Great customer service.

    • @TTwaTTT
      @TTwaTTT 6 років тому +4

      DirtRich I am super happy she is ok but just imagining a old lady saying "I may have cracked my skull but god dammit it if I don't get my bag of chip" is infinitely funny to me

    • @ballsrgrossnugly
      @ballsrgrossnugly 6 років тому +1

      Either that or the image of Poundland staff propping up a bleeding, possibly concussed woman down the aisles while throwing all the expensive stuff in her basket, then hustling her through the checkout and loading her and her tat in to her car for a nice safe drive home!
      XD

    • @krashd
      @krashd 6 років тому +1

      Are you sure she walked into the window? That seems a bit unlikely, it's more probable that she was a witch and that she flew into the window.

  • @castle31666
    @castle31666 Рік тому +2

    "That's impressively long!" Boy, if I had a dime for every time I've heard that...I'd be...well..
    *runs away, slams door, and sobs inconsolably*

  • @brycevo
    @brycevo 6 років тому +479

    Stuart, have you seen the Kinder eggs with the very good Jurassic World toys. They look great. You can even look at their new app.
    It's been a little since you last did Kinders, and it's Jurassic Park's 25th.

    • @nowayjerk8064
      @nowayjerk8064 6 років тому +7

      25 shity movie plots i did not relies they had so many

    • @muisverriet
      @muisverriet 6 років тому +30

      Noway Jerk 25th anniversary, not the 25th movie.

    • @fruit5003
      @fruit5003 6 років тому +2

      +Miikka Karhu "just kinder eggs"

    • @nowayjerk8064
      @nowayjerk8064 6 років тому +1

      my bad

    • @kimsleep4111
      @kimsleep4111 6 років тому +1

      With only the first movie being the only watchable one, I think that a 25th anniversary is a bit of a cluster-fuck.

  • @memberberry6177
    @memberberry6177 6 років тому +10

    That last bit about the tweets was awesome!
    I'm visiting London next week, coming from the Netherlands..
    Should I give Proudland a visit?

  • @zeldamon5
    @zeldamon5 6 років тому +25

    That telescopic fork is actually pretty cool. Gonna have to see if I can find one!

    • @madelinebitts2766
      @madelinebitts2766 5 років тому +1

      It's a backscratcher they've seemed to repurposed, so look for that.

  • @sandrojones8068
    @sandrojones8068 6 років тому +2

    My dad is dead but this is one of the most hilarious videos in a while.
    Thanks Ashens.

  • @tomokokuroki2506
    @tomokokuroki2506 6 років тому +78

    So in England:
    -ThamesLink is basically United Airlines
    -Poundland is Wendy's

    • @nobel11
      @nobel11 6 років тому +3

      Good analogy.

    • @firepower7017
      @firepower7017 6 років тому +1

      Tomoko Kuroki Better than Malaysian Airlines that is for sure

    • @Mick_92
      @Mick_92 6 років тому +2

      Poundland Chan R34 when?

  • @anons_anonymous
    @anons_anonymous 6 років тому +1

    I haven't watched an Ashens video since, what, 2014? Still as great as ever. It's really comforting to know that not everything I enjoyed in the past has changed completely or is gone.

  • @Djcrowered
    @Djcrowered 6 років тому +16

    "Tool pens, pens for tools" -Ashens 2018

  • @jommisalami
    @jommisalami 3 роки тому +2

    the "NOW" "MON" thing genuinely blew my mind

  • @BurtSampson
    @BurtSampson 6 років тому +318

    Oi! You got a permit for that fork?

    • @lily91109
      @lily91109 6 років тому +3

      Burt Sampson no

    • @sevirkenevans
      @sevirkenevans 6 років тому +38

      Burt Sampson OI BIN THAT FORK

    • @guywithphone9222
      @guywithphone9222 6 років тому

      Burt Sampson revenge of the cis

    • @chrisdolmeth2077
      @chrisdolmeth2077 6 років тому +25

      You got a permit for that question?

    • @HydraCFW
      @HydraCFW 6 років тому +21

      Burt Sampson You got a permit for that permit

  • @BD90..
    @BD90.. 6 років тому +26

    Father's day, mother's day, Valentine's day so on....waste of money.....just call it consumerism day

    • @RIXRADvidz
      @RIXRADvidz 6 років тому +5

      that old Whitehall joke...''for my darling wife on Valentine's day, Roses are Red, Violets are blue, Valentine's day is just consumerist bullshit, now don't you have some ironing to do?''

  • @twocvbloke
    @twocvbloke 6 років тому +63

    Given the choice of Poundland cooking chocolate and using ThamesLink services, well, it's a no brainer, chocolate, cos I live up north where ThamesLink has no jurisdiction... :P

    • @thecatherd
      @thecatherd 6 років тому +5

      My dude, Northern is just as bad as Thameslink.

  • @kasey_n_landon
    @kasey_n_landon 6 років тому

    Sometimes I fall out of UA-cam and don't watch people's channels. And sometimes they pop up randomly. As this video did. And I love how happy Ashens still makes me. ♡♡

  • @luvz2reed
    @luvz2reed 6 років тому +67

    Must have Barshens action figures now!

    • @ikmnification5737
      @ikmnification5737 6 років тому +8

      Barshens action playset!
      Barry with questionable hand gesture action!
      Stuart with tat accessories
      ...and it's Eli with his sidekick Eli Box!
      Collect All 8!!!

    • @noptic
      @noptic 6 років тому

      Eli would have to be modular with different packages of noodles and flavoring.
      Ashens would have his amassed collection of Bars vs Hens trophies which are actually just poundland tat with different labels.
      Barry would have some sorta cooking theme and a can of those spicy peanuts with exchangeable face plates signifying surprise, confusion, more confusion, laughter, crying.
      Paul will have some sorta fucking old laptop with XXX written on it to look like the ghostbusters logo and his figure looking around nervously.

  • @polishenglish8356
    @polishenglish8356 6 років тому +203

    God damn god dam, I truly have to salute Poundland for that tweet! :D

    • @doubtfulguest5450
      @doubtfulguest5450 6 років тому +3

      See?

    • @dagonvaldez2878
      @dagonvaldez2878 6 років тому +6

      it was pretty damned epic.

    • @CJODell12
      @CJODell12 6 років тому +5

      I actually started following Poundland on Twitter because of that tweet.

  • @murdock395
    @murdock395 6 років тому +4

    The dark souls bit got me, well done.

  • @ratattack7453
    @ratattack7453 6 років тому +38

    A tattoo on the bottom of the foot would be agonizingly painful

    • @krashd
      @krashd 6 років тому +3

      I have a friend with a tattoo of barb wire around the base of his tiggywinkle. I would take the sole tattoo, personally. And I'd have to be insanely drunk for that.

    • @IanC14
      @IanC14 6 років тому +5

      Rob Fraser tiggywinkle??? That's new to me

    • @lawrencecalablaster568
      @lawrencecalablaster568 5 років тому

      And it would wear out pretty quickly, wouldn't it?

    • @hexyko4850
      @hexyko4850 5 років тому +4

      @@krashd Why? And a barb wire? That's the most cliché thing.
      Interestingly enough, if you're a transgender man and have phalloplasty, they take a piece of your arm and make an implant, and the graft can have tattoos on it so you'd have a tattooed weener.

    • @M50A1
      @M50A1 5 років тому +1

      @@lawrencecalablaster568 why would it wear out?

  • @solidStalemate
    @solidStalemate 6 років тому +81

    I just got the “eat out, mums will enjoy that” joke

    • @RIXRADvidz
      @RIXRADvidz 6 років тому +4

      I almost spit my Kool-Aid....grape

    • @tentringer4065
      @tentringer4065 6 років тому

      41X37 welcome to 'the Dirty Mind Club.'

  • @davidelvin1713
    @davidelvin1713 6 років тому +1

    Nice ‘Shaun of the Dead’ reference there! Also, the response from Poundland had me in tears! Awesome

  • @user-ns3vs3bp3e
    @user-ns3vs3bp3e 6 років тому +17

    “Go to the Winchester, have a pint and wait for this whole thing to blow over” well I need to rewatch Shaun of the Dead now

  • @vladmomot5058
    @vladmomot5058 6 років тому

    Dear Ashens,
    You're awesome. After this video made me crank up so many times, and after all the time I've spent on this channel and with You on Sequelisers, I just wanted to thank You.

  • @HeyImGaminOverHere
    @HeyImGaminOverHere 6 років тому +8

    "eat out", "well mum is going to love that!"

    • @IanC14
      @IanC14 6 років тому +1

      joemygod1960 I love eating out

  • @wolfenman1013
    @wolfenman1013 6 років тому +7

    Gotta love that tiny Shaun of the Dead reference...

  • @ethanwilde
    @ethanwilde 6 років тому +29

    The Winchester wait for this to blow over ahh them famous lines said by your clone

    • @aaronwarrior
      @aaronwarrior 6 років тому +1

      ethan_wilde1 Hows that for some fried gold?

  • @tommyscollection
    @tommyscollection 6 років тому +2

    “Go to the Winchester - have a pint.”
    I got that sly Minder reference Ashens!!

  • @TangoMike88
    @TangoMike88 6 років тому +3

    i never get enough of his cultural references

  • @hroberson3397
    @hroberson3397 6 років тому

    I put off watching ashens videos until I'm having a particularly bad or stressful night. Bless this channel

  • @InterstellarVulpine
    @InterstellarVulpine 6 років тому +20

    This was about people's dads? I thought this was a holiday to commemorate Father Poundland, the Saint of People Who Buy Cheap Gifts For Their Loved Ones.

  • @OfficialNukeDukem
    @OfficialNukeDukem 6 років тому

    I'm in the US and couldn't stop laughing at how epic Poundland was in their response. They have earned my business whenever I'm in a place they're available.

  • @bloodcontagion
    @bloodcontagion 6 років тому +37

    “Go to the Winchester, have a pint, wait for it all to blow over.” Anyone else catch that Shaun Of The Dead reference? 😂

    • @IanC14
      @IanC14 6 років тому +7

      Everyone did

    • @Grandmastergav86
      @Grandmastergav86 5 років тому +1

      Yeah, he referenced a shit film.

    • @Phoebe5448
      @Phoebe5448 5 років тому +1

      It's funny because he looks like Simon Pegg!!

    • @Wemius61
      @Wemius61 9 місяців тому

      I swear Simon Pegg is his alter ego.

  • @robbiestockman8285
    @robbiestockman8285 4 роки тому

    That Poundland reply was beautiful! I am a Poundland fan now! Can't wait to go to one when I visit the UK. It will be my first stop.

  • @BewbsOP
    @BewbsOP 6 років тому +18

    As a person who eats cooking chocolate like candy and hates ferrero rocher, I can definitely say they can be compared. One's delicious, the other is overexpensive shit.

    • @unlokia
      @unlokia 6 років тому +1

      YES!
      And Sainsbury's/Tesco "value" brands are excellent, the former being made *In France* - home of INCREDIBLE chocolatiers. And also, the darker the better I find, up to around 80% cocoa - *and Dairy Milk SHITE should be banned* - why are the British SO addicted to SHIT products?

    • @BewbsOP
      @BewbsOP 6 років тому

      Absolutely. Pure dark chocolate is the best chocolate. I'm the only person I know who enjoys eating raw cocoa beans.

    • @mgthestrange9098
      @mgthestrange9098 6 років тому

      With these Poundland cooking chocolate you are surely spoiling us!

    • @EddieHawkinsII
      @EddieHawkinsII 6 років тому +1

      I now have the mental picture of Mrs. Doyle bringing out a pyramid of Poundland cooking chocolate bars for those visiting bishops instead of the Ferrero Rocher...

  • @Willom
    @Willom 6 років тому

    I forgot how much I loved this channel.

  • @SlyPearTree
    @SlyPearTree 6 років тому +21

    The hammer pen look at least harder to lose than a regular one.
    Edited, thanks to jokerswild00

    • @RIXRADvidz
      @RIXRADvidz 6 років тому

      the other looks like a fletchless dart

  • @gregmcgregginton574
    @gregmcgregginton574 6 років тому

    I love the poundland drama at the end. that was gold. thanks, mate.

  • @elitezararus286
    @elitezararus286 6 років тому +20

    *You Died* I actually laughed harder than expected.

  • @averylividmoose3599
    @averylividmoose3599 6 років тому +11

    Praise poundland, God bless the motherland of pounds! I salute thee!

  • @Sergeantmajormario
    @Sergeantmajormario 6 років тому +3

    "Eat out!" Ooh, Mum's gonna enjoy that.
    Subtle, I like it XD

  • @lopezswift
    @lopezswift 4 роки тому +1

    The shaun of the dead reference nearly killed me

  • @MagicianFairy
    @MagicianFairy 6 років тому +17

    poundland gave a pounding to thameslink.

  • @Lemolum
    @Lemolum 6 років тому

    I have a friend who's been job hopping for about a year having been through about 5 jobs, but at the moment they're working at Poundland and they honestly describe it as the best place they've ever worked.

  • @BraveMicrobe38
    @BraveMicrobe38 6 років тому +7

    I must say this video is louder than normal but still great

    • @alastairward2774
      @alastairward2774 6 років тому +3

      BraveMicrobe38 helps if you watch in the shower.

  • @franktedder1236
    @franktedder1236 3 роки тому +2

    I'm not even British and I would shop at poundland for life

  • @megano2000
    @megano2000 6 років тому +4

    Happy Father's Day Ashens!! ^.^

  • @wesleythomas7125
    @wesleythomas7125 2 роки тому +1

    He really said "I'mma end this man's whole carreer!"

  • @erebostd
    @erebostd 6 років тому +6

    Unexpected shaun of the dead quote was unexpected! :D

  • @LordmonkeyTRM
    @LordmonkeyTRM 6 років тому +2

    Standing O for Austin Cooke...Bravo...Amazing.

  • @Tonyinflorida
    @Tonyinflorida 6 років тому +66

    My friend, I missed you.

  • @S0ulGh0st
    @S0ulGh0st 6 років тому

    This is one of the very few people on UA-cam that often makes me laugh xD

  • @llamasandanime
    @llamasandanime 6 років тому +29

    Why are British and American mother's day on two different days, but father's day is the same day for both countries?

    • @OdaSwifteye
      @OdaSwifteye 6 років тому +5

      That IS strange.

    • @lauriebot3941
      @lauriebot3941 6 років тому +32

      llamasandanime the American mothers day is celebrated on the international mothers day, the same as most other countries. The British mothers day is mothering sunday which was actually an old church festival and originally nothing to do with your own mother, it just mutated into that over time. Keep quiet about this though, most British people are unaware of the international mothers day, and we don't want our mums thinking they can have 2 special days...

    • @chrisyoung4390
      @chrisyoung4390 6 років тому +2

      Because the holidays are corporate money-making events and brands need to recover to be able to suck the most money out of people

    • @lauren3183
      @lauren3183 6 років тому +1

      I think it’s ridiculous. UK should celebrate it whenever most of the other countries are celebrating it!
      My mum makes us celebrate both mothers days for reasons I can’t fathom why

    • @CliveCooperford
      @CliveCooperford 6 років тому +3

      Anyanka hi Why should we? Difference is good and despite the celebrations significant evolution, the extra history is pleasant.

  • @Weaponsandstuff93
    @Weaponsandstuff93 6 років тому

    That's an assault fork if I ever saw one.

  • @zoogoo404
    @zoogoo404 6 років тому +9

    Thameslink got SOLID OOFD

  • @BBRandomness2909
    @BBRandomness2909 6 років тому

    Love your videos. I love the fact you review items and have some banter in the process

  • @steelscooter
    @steelscooter 6 років тому +19

    As someone with tattoos on his arms and chest I would rather have my fingernails pulled out than have the sole of my foot tattooed. Slapping the sole of the foot with wood is actually a legitimate and effective torture. It would be unbelievable agony. 😮👍

    • @punkizm
      @punkizm 6 років тому +1

      SteelScooter I have the bottom of my foot tattooed, not actually that bad. Similar feeling as the knee sensation-wise.

    • @Milamberinx
      @Milamberinx 6 років тому +11

      It's such an adorable idea.
      I presumed that the tattoo artist friend of Ashens denied the requests because of the risk of infection.

    • @RIXRADvidz
      @RIXRADvidz 6 років тому

      some people really like that kind of pain. I'll pass.

    • @Adrastia
      @Adrastia 6 років тому +1

      Ick. Feet. I'd prefer if people don't call attention to them. I've heard some people get off on foot torture. That's really weird.

    • @dr58885
      @dr58885 6 років тому

      Adrastia those toes, hand em over

  • @gagglegames
    @gagglegames 5 років тому +1

    You don't ride an horse to an house, but you do ride an 'orse to an 'ouse.