Crack Addicted Trick interview-Patrick

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  • Опубліковано 7 лис 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 7 тис.

  • @push555push
    @push555push 3 роки тому +6192

    "I want people to love me because I don't love me." Hit hard

    • @Articulated84Beauty
      @Articulated84Beauty 3 роки тому +39

      Yes. It definitely hit different. ♥️

    • @thematriarchy2075
      @thematriarchy2075 3 роки тому +36

      I love you 😘

    • @Amanda-bt1ur
      @Amanda-bt1ur 3 роки тому +42

      exactly! He's definitely different. and he is right CRACK IS AWFUL.

    • @nurseanastasialiberty
      @nurseanastasialiberty 3 роки тому +56

      Yes, that hit me hard too. I used to struggle with self-love growing up and after I lost my fiance last year. Self-love is something we have to learn on our own. Every day I tell myself that "I am lovable" and "deserve love". I still believe in love. Everyone is lovable and I hope Patrick knows that he is lovable.

    • @Gunnar2V
      @Gunnar2V 3 роки тому +15

      Same here. Very sad.

  • @ODBonesCorleone402
    @ODBonesCorleone402 7 місяців тому +288

    I had to come back to his first video after watching the one of him that Mark posted this morning. He is now 2 years sober and the turn around he made is UNBELIEVABLE. Good job, Patrick! Good job.

    • @lisabever2115
      @lisabever2115 7 місяців тому +5

      Me too!!!

    • @dominic7178
      @dominic7178 7 місяців тому +3

      Proud of him

    • @Love407here
      @Love407here 7 місяців тому +1

      I did too his story just shows recovery is possible if you really want to quit
      Patrick looks so healthy and happy in his update interview proud of you Patrick look at you now Rocking Recovery hugs

    • @jeepmanxj
      @jeepmanxj 6 місяців тому +1

      "I wonder how much this videos going to affect my life". As of the most recent video and his story, positively and I hope he keeps with it.

    • @heatherfrost1900
      @heatherfrost1900 5 місяців тому

      I know! I just saw it today and had to come back. The glow up is amazing. He is a beautiful human and he will do amazing things with that wonderful brain, heart and sincere personality.

  • @anthonyaguilar8175
    @anthonyaguilar8175 3 роки тому +3895

    I know this man personally and he is one of the kindest most sincere people I've had the pleasure to meet in the rooms. I pray he makes it back.

    • @PRMermaid
      @PRMermaid 3 роки тому +88

      Tell him that he can make it out of this. To pinch himself and say "God help me please" it works

    • @philipnava8165
      @philipnava8165 3 роки тому +44

      That’s where I know him from. Good dude.

    • @Nevs-
      @Nevs- 3 роки тому +49

      Addiction is the worst disease ..

    • @likearitual
      @likearitual 3 роки тому +302

      @@PRMermaid God is unessecary. Power of will is your God. I'm tired of the God talk in addiction circles, we've moved past that as a society

    • @PRMermaid
      @PRMermaid 3 роки тому +131

      @@Nevs- I Pray to God everyday because he is the Only one that can give me what I'm in need of.

  • @wesplumley1593
    @wesplumley1593 3 роки тому +784

    "man I wonder how this video will affect my life ?" Brother I hope this video affects your life in the most positive and uplifting way possible.

    • @crabbygramma5553
      @crabbygramma5553 2 роки тому +2

      AND, how is this video going to affect other people’s lives?

    • @wesplumley1593
      @wesplumley1593 2 роки тому +5

      @@crabbygramma5553 kind of the whole point of the series I feel..... but I was praising the gentleman who candidly and emotionally told his story, hoping he can find health and happiness.

    • @melindachmielewski9166
      @melindachmielewski9166 Рік тому

      expecially if ur tell ur friend he passed away from a heart attack

    • @TheWingus
      @TheWingus Рік тому +3

      These 5 videos are waaaaay more effective than any DARE program where a cop talks to you about all the bad things that will happen to you if you smoke one joint or drink one beer

    • @informationageenterprise2184
      @informationageenterprise2184 7 місяців тому +16

      This comment aged like FINE WINE. March 20th 2024 a video is posted with Patrick and he is 2 years clean and sober. Praise God!

  • @bryanflynn518
    @bryanflynn518 Рік тому +223

    This is the definition of addiction, he is so self-aware but still can’t shake it. God bless everyone going through this.

    • @bunk95
      @bunk95 Рік тому +1

      Addiction is fiction. Do you think and act like that is untrue?

    • @bryanflynn518
      @bryanflynn518 11 місяців тому +7

      @@Humble-iq5ue lmao I’m guessing you’ve never dealt with substance abuse

    • @bryanflynn518
      @bryanflynn518 11 місяців тому +6

      @@bunk95 it’s all a mindset so you are right but the process of getting your mind to change is what people struggle with. That’s addiction.

    • @Humble-iq5ue
      @Humble-iq5ue 11 місяців тому +1

      @@bryanflynn518 yeah I've use various drugs throughout the years but never got addicted to anything. So yeah I don't know. It's all mind power to be able to walk away rather than succumb to the fleshly desires.

    • @tmc1415
      @tmc1415 7 місяців тому +3

      @@Humble-iq5uewith certain drugs, by the time you make the decision to “walk away”; you start having withdrawals and are technically “addicted. That’s what dude meant when he said he/you don’t have experience with substance abuse. That’s not me throwing a jab

  • @Mia-qt4th
    @Mia-qt4th 3 роки тому +2071

    The most likable honest man, I hope he beats this addiction.

    • @larrenzzoamos9753
      @larrenzzoamos9753 3 роки тому +31

      @J NOEL Congrats brotha! Keep going

    • @lori6037
      @lori6037 3 роки тому +12

      @J NOEL Thats awesome, congratulations!

    • @dyingdoesnthurt1967
      @dyingdoesnthurt1967 3 роки тому +6

      You are a lovely guy, I hope you can beat this.
      Thanks for sharing 🙏

    • @fanbatcher
      @fanbatcher 3 роки тому

      Fake addict.....

    • @phoenixzappa7366
      @phoenixzappa7366 3 роки тому +8

      @J NOEL
      I started smoking it yesterday. It's great! Makes you feel great!

  • @emilioemele
    @emilioemele 3 роки тому +2081

    Man, this is one of the most profound, confusing, intellectual, menacing and beautiful interviews you’ve done.

    • @Djzommer1
      @Djzommer1 3 роки тому +37

      crack

    • @juliequigley637
      @juliequigley637 3 роки тому +18

      Right because he is actually a normal person I’ve been there done that

    • @rsohlich1
      @rsohlich1 3 роки тому +13

      Addiction is a mofo.

    • @kapowitsme7646
      @kapowitsme7646 3 роки тому +13

      You described this interview so well!😀

    • @heckyes137
      @heckyes137 3 роки тому +3

      Its called self awareness. Alot of people should try it out. I hear all the kids are doing it. 😉

  • @danageibel
    @danageibel 3 роки тому +1061

    Pat was friends with my big brother in high school. I love you, Pat. You were always nice to me even though my brother hated me and I'm rooting for you. You can stay free , I know you can.

  • @bradr3541
    @bradr3541 2 роки тому +395

    The fact he knows he can’t get a girlfriend and have kids while an addict shows how grounded in reality he still is. The fact he still wants those things is also commendable. I wish he had someone close to give him tough love.

    • @richieh2006
      @richieh2006 2 роки тому +1

      Same. That's what he needs.

    • @sirdopaminesjournal3292
      @sirdopaminesjournal3292 Рік тому +5

      Not to take anything away from Patrick, but all addicts feel the same way.

    • @juliettezea9507
      @juliettezea9507 Рік тому +1

      I can’t get a family either

    • @Godmadeanna
      @Godmadeanna Рік тому +11

      @@sirdopaminesjournal3292 there’s a lot of addicts that are in relationships and have children so not really

    • @Sir_Vex_DestroyerOfSemenDemons
      @Sir_Vex_DestroyerOfSemenDemons Рік тому +1

      tough love doesnt work. addicts wont get clean until THEY are ready to get clean

  • @TimeWatch5
    @TimeWatch5 3 роки тому +2022

    I have so much respect for his honestly. He's more honest then my mother.

    • @bobbieoxendine
      @bobbieoxendine 3 роки тому +35

      Mr watch5... how is everything at home?

    • @candicecandy8137
      @candicecandy8137 3 роки тому +17

      Aw🙁...yeah... Noticing things with my dad. People r who they r. Good, bad, neutral. 🤷🏾‍♀️I'm blessed but I get n2 a funk wen it's comes 2 him. THE BAD THING: I have 2 smoke a cigarette b4 I deal with him. Even on phone. But I'm trying 2 stop the tobacco tho. My blood pressure goes up. I don't have chilling mechanisms. Weed IS friend indeed 🤔🤷🏾‍♀️. It helps

    • @pierceoff6747
      @pierceoff6747 3 роки тому +61

      @@candicecandy8137 fuck your writing is hard to understand

    • @robbywallace9402
      @robbywallace9402 3 роки тому +20

      But his job won't. He just lost EVERYTHING. The state of California is not gonna keep a crackhead engineer on staff. He even said the date of the interview.

    • @fpsdovah2572
      @fpsdovah2572 3 роки тому +17

      The word you’re looking for is than.

  • @crushyyog3762
    @crushyyog3762 2 роки тому +470

    Being an Ex meth addict.. I identify with the sexual fixation, impotence, and behavior that he speaks about while smoking crack. I engaged in all of it, and it was almost refreshing hearing someone has struggled with the exact same thing. I’m now sober, in college, and getting a degree to become a therapist for those who struggle with addiction.
    We do recover. ❤️

    • @trump24trump
      @trump24trump 2 роки тому +7

      No one cares

    • @domdicenso1656
      @domdicenso1656 Рік тому +17

      I think all meth users have that sexual fixation. That's simply what meth does. I've never experienced that with crack, just wanting more crack.

    • @PBUH-SAW.
      @PBUH-SAW. Рік тому

      Good luck 🙏🏾

    • @sahpire75
      @sahpire75 Рік тому +33

      ​@@trump24trump then why ya here? You cared enough to comment

    • @linadang2197
      @linadang2197 Рік тому

      Yes. Amphetamines causes you to have a Non-Stop p*** and masturbation fixation. It's so disgusting and unnatural. Every once in awhile I will have about a two-week binge on caring about nothing but watching p*** and masturbating when otherwise I'm a semi normal person. So sick of it.

  • @Addsiqishrb
    @Addsiqishrb 3 роки тому +3389

    You can literally see the normal person in him trapped in this high mind.

    • @kingofthetrill
      @kingofthetrill 3 роки тому +57

      This was me but on coc and liquor 2 years ago. I'm still not sober but I'm alot better now

    • @NomadicNotions866
      @NomadicNotions866 3 роки тому +18

      Yo!!!!! There were 111 likes and I scrolled through and saw this... Great week ahead!!!!

    • @michelofelia7735
      @michelofelia7735 3 роки тому +20

      So as If hes In a trance in a constant tug of war.

    • @Lord_Pender
      @Lord_Pender 3 роки тому +22

      Dude like literally man...literally...not physically or metaphorically...but literally dude...

    • @michaeltammaro9434
      @michaeltammaro9434 3 роки тому +8

      You can see the normal person in him on the follow-up video.

  • @stonedmetal666
    @stonedmetal666 2 роки тому +266

    I grew up around addicts, my dad was a pretty big drug dealer. The amount of people i met who were INSANELY smart like Patrick, self aware, and outside of their addiction were completely normal people blows my mind. Its a very strange and sad world to be immersed in. I hope Patrick can overcome his addiction for those who couldn’t.

    • @Samantha-dj7wr
      @Samantha-dj7wr Рік тому +6

      I am a recovering addict, I know so many addicts that are so smart & if they got clean they could do so good in life. It’s heartbreaking, when your using nothing else matters.

    • @dustinfowler7868
      @dustinfowler7868 Рік тому +3

      Pretty much correct,most addicts are very intelligent, including myself! functional tho. Maybe we think too much and are trying to escape it,that's me at least,I have to shut it off sometimes .These interviews are always so emotional.

    • @travisfleenor2418
      @travisfleenor2418 Рік тому +5

      The number of functioning, even high functioning crack users would blow most people's minds. There are folks who smoke rock that most people would never in a million years think do. I'm sure meth is the same way.

    • @Bigboro
      @Bigboro Рік тому

      @@travisfleenor2418my friend Alex smokes Crack and he is a Lawyer.

    • @johnb.shakoor2352
      @johnb.shakoor2352 Рік тому +1

      My dad was also a dealer and somehow i managed to be around the trashiest type of drug users lol im not denying that alot of them are normal but ive seen people who actually lost their minds on drugs. Kind of warps my perception of hard drug users but no doubt there are those who just need to get out of a bad habit and can be saved.

  • @joem6043
    @joem6043 3 роки тому +1086

    This guy just wanted to get all this out. He clearly feels very guilty about everything.

    • @nataliesteinhauer402
      @nataliesteinhauer402 3 роки тому +26

      crack is like a truth serum!

    • @user-jy2sj4ed4i
      @user-jy2sj4ed4i 3 роки тому +8

      @Alan not sure addiction ever suddenly disappears

    • @kieran7011
      @kieran7011 3 роки тому +1

      @@user-jy2sj4ed4i it definitely doesn't

    • @kieran7011
      @kieran7011 3 роки тому +3

      @Alan addiction never just suddenly goes away

    • @jeremywall7206
      @jeremywall7206 3 роки тому +6

      Nobody is proud of it. Its a ball a chain that you are always ashamed of. But, he knows the why, and he is honest but he hasnt said the why yet. In his mind he knows the hang up, he wont reveal it, we never do, we learn to live with it without ever speaking it out load.

  • @TiffanyMaryJean
    @TiffanyMaryJean 3 роки тому +1114

    *He’s quite likable and a tad charming while he’s been up for 5 days. I can’t imagine his personality sober and slept for 8hrs. Get sober my friend!!*

    • @SoilentGr33n
      @SoilentGr33n 3 роки тому +56

      I thought exactly the same thing. The dude is smart, funny, decent looking, and holy shit what?? Been up for 5 days WOW.

    • @TiffanyMaryJean
      @TiffanyMaryJean 3 роки тому +38

      @@SoilentGr33n the 3 videos he did within a month or so were insane. In a month he went from a relapsed addict who’s a Harvard grad with a city position making 6 figures who has a car and apartment in la. To a addict with a sex addiction, who’s spent most of his time on skid row looking for crack and hookers, missed work probably lost his job, spent all his money, sold his car for crack, was beat up and robbed, his dad won’t pay for his condo or give him money...just within a month! It’s very hard for me to understand since I’ve never been addicted to anything. I think In general it’s hard to understand how one can go so far down from where they once were. He’s went to 10-15 rehabs and still can’t hold his own money and can’t stay sober longer than 6 months. He has all the support in the works from family to friends but still his addiction is winning. I’m sorry but there’s a point where it seems like he just doesn’t want to stay sober. At what point does his family and friends walk away? This has been going on for 20 years. It’s gotta be exhausting for the ppl who love him.

    • @bobshenix
      @bobshenix 3 роки тому +22

      Not exactly charming... he's forthright and has moments of lucidity but he's pretty neurotic IMO

    • @thomasgallegos2832
      @thomasgallegos2832 3 роки тому +2

      @@TiffanyMaryJean My brother has the same problem . He tries to stay off it. We have to take accountability although he is still a victim and that's why its so illegal .

    • @nunyabizwacks6711
      @nunyabizwacks6711 3 роки тому +3

      @@bobshenix agreed. far from "charming"

  • @Ginny71166
    @Ginny71166 3 роки тому +978

    I _really, really, really_ like this dude.
    He’s the most honest addict I’ve ever heard share his story… and I have ten years and eight months sober, so I’ve heard a _lot_ of stories.

    • @GnosticCushite
      @GnosticCushite 2 роки тому +4

      You look like you got trouble written all over you.

    • @maximeanselot3007
      @maximeanselot3007 2 роки тому +6

      I hope you stay sober. I know it's hard

    • @zadekeys2194
      @zadekeys2194 2 роки тому +6

      11years Well done !!!

    • @phanx0m924
      @phanx0m924 2 роки тому

      wooohooo

    • @leax6968
      @leax6968 2 роки тому +1

      Congrats 👏 love hearing its even possible. Currently on maintenance myself

  • @lisabever2115
    @lisabever2115 7 місяців тому +76

    Watching this after seeing the follow up of sober Patrick. He is truly a miracle!

    • @joshweaver7998
      @joshweaver7998 7 місяців тому +2

      first time in a while ive even brought to tears. so inspirational

    • @lisabever2115
      @lisabever2115 7 місяців тому

      @@joshweaver7998 I know. Gives you hope for so many who appear to be completely hopeless.

  • @nigel4776
    @nigel4776 3 роки тому +2101

    The problem with hard drug addiction is that being sober is almost as miserable as getting high, and those are your only two options

    • @XxNoMinDxX
      @XxNoMinDxX 3 роки тому +126

      You hit it

    • @sewardcurrie
      @sewardcurrie 3 роки тому +52

      well said....and sadly true...

    • @martin1226
      @martin1226 3 роки тому +101

      Nailed it. It's so fucking boring, but being a junkie is just gross. What to dooooooo

    • @nhlombardi6946
      @nhlombardi6946 3 роки тому +61

      Being high is almost as miserable as being sober

    • @johnferretti3274
      @johnferretti3274 3 роки тому +99

      Give it time brother u will start building back your pleasures in your brain, go to the gym and keep being sober and u will start enjoying life. But the first couple months of sobriety sucks and life sucks but b patient it’s worth the fight.

  • @respecthumility1417
    @respecthumility1417 3 роки тому +278

    Old saying. “You can’t be too dumb to get clean but you can be too smart”. Meaning you outthink yourself. I pray he gets it. Extremely articulate.

    • @michaelmuldowney3131
      @michaelmuldowney3131 3 роки тому +7

      It takes a certain amount of intelligence to convince yourself that next hit is what you need. Even when you know it’s not.

    • @savagecomments9195
      @savagecomments9195 3 роки тому +1

      I hope you see this but I thank you for this comment. I believe that this saying is what led me to come clean of myself. Wow. I’m prolly gonna write that down in my important notebook and read it every morning first thing. Thank you sincerely, -adrian

  • @amandamia9999
    @amandamia9999 3 роки тому +1360

    hes so aware about his disease its crazy. hes literally fighting himself.

    • @denamullen340
      @denamullen340 3 роки тому +53

      That’s all addicts.
      Well the ones fighting long enough are very aware

    • @omegablack9044
      @omegablack9044 3 роки тому +13

      Do it long enough and there’s no denying it.

    • @Liljuggbean
      @Liljuggbean 3 роки тому +5

      He’s a sociopath

    • @jon222-r4j
      @jon222-r4j 3 роки тому +51

      Anthony Lara i swear yall watch 1 youtube video n think you a psychiatrist now 😂😂

    • @kyledodge496
      @kyledodge496 3 роки тому +7

      @@jon222-r4j most addicts to have sociopathic tendacies. Saying this as a former heroin addict.

  • @1sherba
    @1sherba 2 роки тому +94

    My son had a gifted IQ, was an amazing artist- he could draw a picture that looked like a photograph, but he was an addict. His drug of choice was heroin. He got and stayed clean for 3 years but had a relapse & passed away from an accidental overdose 4 years ago this coming June. Drug abuse devastates the addict and their families. I miss him so. 💔 I hope this man can overcome his addiction.

    • @dmitriy6147
      @dmitriy6147 Рік тому +4

      So sorry for your loss.

    • @1sherba
      @1sherba Рік тому +1

      @@dmitriy6147 Thank you so much.

    • @tylerm1853
      @tylerm1853 Рік тому +1

      Very sorry to hear that 1sherba

    • @bunk95
      @bunk95 Рік тому

      Addicts are fictional. Do you think and act like that is untrue?

    • @slicko_
      @slicko_ Рік тому +2

      My prayers go out to you. You are not alone

  • @smax4895
    @smax4895 3 роки тому +762

    It’s so scary to know that even with this much self-awareness and reflection that addiction still wins in most cases.

    • @shellabella8625
      @shellabella8625 3 роки тому +15

      💯💯💯

    • @666blindrider
      @666blindrider 3 роки тому +43

      Yep. Most people that are addicted to any drug don't make it. When I was in rehab ( I even asked for 2 more months) they told me straight out out of 10 addicts only 2 will make it through this vicious cycle. That really woke me up. 9 years clean off meth, 4 years clean off alcohol. But I still smoke weed to calm me down cause of my major depression and social anxiety since I can remember. Good luck to all the great people that have addiction problems. Take it one day at a time. Exercising lowers my anxiety depression tremendously.

    • @Noise_floorxx
      @Noise_floorxx 3 роки тому +3

      Yep

    • @brandizunno8943
      @brandizunno8943 3 роки тому +5

      @@666blindrider, Congrats! My sister in law, has been an addicted for the last 10+ years. She’s been in and out of many rehabs, but unfortunately she’s still using. Congrats! God Bless 🙏🙏!!!

    • @alyssag.5758
      @alyssag.5758 3 роки тому +8

      You need alot more than self awareness to overcome crack. Knowing you have a problem is just the first step.

  • @AdamFraserTv
    @AdamFraserTv 3 роки тому +301

    The best part about this interview in my opinion , is that it shows that ANYONE is susceptible to addiction and the devastating affects it has on the mind no matter your background , education etc .

    • @tianitra
      @tianitra 3 роки тому +10

      Yes !! Even a Harvard Grad !

    • @nursetherese7894
      @nursetherese7894 3 роки тому +19

      Im an RN that got addicted to opiates at age 38. I hit my bottom and went to treatment (knowing I’d soon be uninsured) the night before I went to treatment I was on the hoestroll trying to make some money. Here I am, multiple degrees, an experienced nurse with an impeccable record, specializing in neonatal intensive care, training other RNs and ending up a junkie. Spoiler alert- I’ve been clean since November 2018 thanks to treatment and SMART recovery for follow up care. Bottom line is, this can happen to anyone

    • @damienholland8103
      @damienholland8103 3 роки тому +8

      Agreed. Many Americans just put them in this neat little box, a category, a stereotype, to feel superior and separate from them.
      I think Mark was right about why he needed to create this channel. Because many people just don't "get it" until they watch these interviews.
      Legalization and regulation of drugs and greater efforts at rehabilitation over incarceration would help reduce the issue which, even politically there is bipartisan agreement on this, is out of control.

    • @AdamFraserTv
      @AdamFraserTv 3 роки тому +6

      Nurse Therese I wish there was a ❤️ button . I don’t know you but I’m proud of you ! You are the type of person we can only hope to have in the medical field or at the very least , in a position to related too , understand and guide other who suffer from addiction . Genuinely happy to hear your story .

    • @sr6061
      @sr6061 3 роки тому +2

      @@nursetherese7894 what made you put that substance in your body. Why did you make that choice knowing medically what it would do to You?

  • @MuMu-fu7qe
    @MuMu-fu7qe 2 роки тому +203

    Watching him gurn and fidget makes me feel tremendous relief to be clean and sober for 3 years. You seem like a great guy and I hope you overcome your addiction, Patrick.

    • @Alienspecies635
      @Alienspecies635 Рік тому +3

      Hope your still clean and sober !

    • @edmunds1875
      @edmunds1875 Рік тому +1

      Are you from the U.K? I've only ever heard "gurn" here in U.K

    • @danieljames6975
      @danieljames6975 Рік тому +1

      yeah me too i was just like that. its just body language saying "i need another hit"

    • @spitbukket6862
      @spitbukket6862 Рік тому

      @@edmunds1875we say gurn in Australia as well

    • @bunk95
      @bunk95 Рік тому

      Addiction is fiction.

  • @agameofdronez
    @agameofdronez 3 роки тому +320

    That’s the curse of being self-aware and intelligent while fighting addiction. You watch yourself gradually become more and more consumed by your DOC. You know what you’re doing is destructive, and when you sober up you’re left to try and restore the damage you’ve caused. You lose control of your own free will. You become an observer in your very own life.

  • @HansJanus
    @HansJanus 3 роки тому +589

    I was clean from heroin for 8 years. Then last year I made the mistake of getting ‘just one bag’ to take the edge off the severity of stress and issues I was dealing with at the time. Fast forward one year - I have sold all my worldly possessions, I mean everything. I have been left with nothing but one massive habit. Keeling this a secret from my family and everyone I love around me adds to the dire situation I’ve created for myself. I took the first steps and admitted defeat today and phoned the addiction centre, the same centre who got me clean years ago. I have an assessment phone call in a couple of days. I’m looking forward to a ‘normal’ life once again. I can’t remember the last time I went to bed and didn’t cry myself to the very little sleep I currently get. I hope he gets his life in order eventually. I hope I do too. Thank you for these videos x

    • @marthawatkins7184
      @marthawatkins7184 3 роки тому +10

      So did you go to rehab? How are you doing? Hope you're no longer crying every night!

    • @goose33
      @goose33 3 роки тому +6

      Ive been there buddy
      How are you doing now

    • @miracledawn1
      @miracledawn1 3 роки тому +7

      I hope you’re doing well! Wishing you peace, love, light and clarity!

    • @yoursurgerysister
      @yoursurgerysister 3 роки тому +8

      Don’t give up. You got this. We are rooting for you.

    • @reesevasquez1434
      @reesevasquez1434 3 роки тому +4

      Hey Hans hope you are doing well today, even if it's a bad day know that people are thinking about you and you can always try again tomorrow. As long as you are alive you have a chance to do better and change your life to whatever you want it to be. God loves you no matter what and hes always with you when you feel alone. That space in your head that's emptiness when you think to yourself, that's god just ask him and he will answer.

  • @liesarenowtruth3880
    @liesarenowtruth3880 3 роки тому +325

    You're not disgusting, Patrick. You're a human being deserving of dignity, kindness and real love. You have to convince yourself of that.

    • @dangerous8333
      @dangerous8333 2 роки тому +12

      He didn't say he was disgusting.
      He said it was disgusting to have an impulse for prostitutes that also smoke crack.
      That is disgusting. Don't be an enabler. I like this guy but don't take away stigmas that should be there. Even he thinks it's disgusting. That's why he's saying it.

    • @liesarenowtruth3880
      @liesarenowtruth3880 2 роки тому +7

      @@dangerous8333 I recall him saying that he thinks that he is disgusting.
      Please get a life.

    • @boycottjews
      @boycottjews 2 роки тому

      Just like being alive 18 years means you should vote.

    • @tomasdelatoba7572
      @tomasdelatoba7572 2 роки тому

      @@dangerous8333 it's hard to hear when he says it but he might have said "I'm so disgusting man" or "It's so disgusting man" but it sounds more like the former than the latter.

    • @liesarenowtruth3880
      @liesarenowtruth3880 2 роки тому +1

      @@bandlehars please find something that brings you joy.

  • @tiffany935
    @tiffany935 7 місяців тому +81

    As of March 20, 2024, Patrick is SOBER! Way to go, Patrick!!!! 👏👏👏

    • @informationageenterprise2184
      @informationageenterprise2184 7 місяців тому +2

      2 years sober!! Praise God

    • @maryshannagaul4849
      @maryshannagaul4849 7 місяців тому

      You are amazing Patrick!

    • @carsongibson5145
      @carsongibson5145 6 місяців тому

      This is my first viewing of Patrick's part 1. I'm glad to see he's kicked it. I always wonder how people are doing now, since I'm watching 3 - 4 yrs behind. So many are heartbreaking. Success is good, awesome job Patrick! 😁

    • @wallsharkconstruction3819
      @wallsharkconstruction3819 6 місяців тому +2

      And married sooo proud

    • @paullemiremusic3101
      @paullemiremusic3101 3 місяці тому

      When I watched and listened to Patrick I felt a sense of true empathy and compassion for what I consider to be the most genuine and loving soul who came on here to share his pain with all of us. Patrick, I just want to say Thank you for what you did for me in helping get in touch with such deep and loving emotions. Because of you, that happened ❤

  • @Kat-ip5ex
    @Kat-ip5ex 3 роки тому +234

    This is heart breaking. My mother was a crackhead and literally threw her life away. Threw her kids away and died alone in a hotel room. This is what crack will do to you...it will make you throw away everything that really matters in your life. I pray this man is able to escape the cycle of addiction.

    • @Kat-ip5ex
      @Kat-ip5ex 3 роки тому +3

      @@2.0mhllala thank you. Everybody goes through some hardship, what matters is how you deal with it.

    • @fuckYouTubeBringBackDislikes
      @fuckYouTubeBringBackDislikes 3 роки тому +1

      @2dawgz i honestly don't think that crack cocaine can kill you alone.

    • @mrcontroversy222
      @mrcontroversy222 3 роки тому +4

      @@fuckUA-camBringBackDislikes it’s called a cocaine overdose......

    • @tinaashley7802
      @tinaashley7802 3 роки тому +3

      @@fuckUA-camBringBackDislikes your in denial then,any drug can kill

    • @tinaashley7802
      @tinaashley7802 3 роки тому +3

      So sorry you lost your mum and had to go through this,thats heartbreaking,i hope you've got through it all and have made a good life for yourself,bless you 💝

  • @byronwright801
    @byronwright801 3 роки тому +776

    He is so disgusted with himself but can't stop, addiction is a monster!

    • @monicabroussard840
      @monicabroussard840 3 роки тому +3

      Yes !

    • @notimetowaste1254
      @notimetowaste1254 3 роки тому +3

      Yep, I could tell by his smile....🥴

    • @byronwright801
      @byronwright801 3 роки тому +4

      Smiling faces........sometimes they lie😉

    • @elcid8889
      @elcid8889 3 роки тому

      @@notimetowaste1254 And I could tell for his desire of dominance over other victims (female addicts). Great guy, he's a okay! 😉

    • @-_oOtianaOo_-
      @-_oOtianaOo_- 2 роки тому +4

      @@byronwright801 I I agree 💯, because it could be a coping mechanism. I laugh when I am nervous/anxious and people may take it as I am flirting or whatever they may think, and really it is because I have anxiety and it is one of my coping mechanism.

  • @DrT2213
    @DrT2213 3 роки тому +546

    This is so unfortunate because he’s actually a nice looking man with intelligence to match. He also seems very sincere and kind hearted. Hoping for a full recovery for him so he can grasp the things in life he deserves.

    • @carolynnalvarez7032
      @carolynnalvarez7032 2 роки тому +8

      Absolutely he's very sincere and cute. Hoping the best for him 🙏

    • @AIvey
      @AIvey 2 роки тому +5

      Only thing I find out is that ones they hit the pipe...it's seem they can't get of this runaway train.

    • @DreadHeadCorey
      @DreadHeadCorey 2 роки тому +2

      She said he’s cute yeeeaahh he’s a good guy for sure seems like it

    • @stonejackballer9519
      @stonejackballer9519 2 роки тому +8

      @The Real Confession - You know, it’s rather sad and honestly a problem that you and some of the other commenters are completely ignorant to the impact of what you are saying and how it may impact/effect viewers/readers of this content. Saying things like you did, verbatim - “So unfortunate” because he’s a “nice looking man with intelligence to match” and how he “seems very sincere and kind hearted” - although maybe true or nice, can really hurt someone else who may be dealing with similar issues but possibly doesn’t have those character traits! I mean is what you said to imply that if you’re not a “nice looking” person or “intelligent” that, those individuals aren’t just as deserving of help and the care/love people like you seem to have for someone who falls into a certain category. I really don’t feel as though I need to go into details but EVERYONE needs help and needs OUR support and LOVE. NOT JUST THE CUTE ONES OR THE INTELLIGENT ONES. And make no mistakes, just because someone looks a certain way…MEANS NOTHING! Ever heard of a wolf in sheeps clothing, I mean come on. Show LOVE to EVERYONE! EVERYONE NEEDS IT! ,..and LIFE IS SHORT! Sorry if I came across rude at all in this post but after watching this and reading these posts I was just appalled because it is just all to often where people get treated a certain way because of the way they look or sound or what credentials they hold. ALL WE HAVE IS TODAY, GIVE YOUR LOVE TO EVERYONE. If you’ve made it this far, thank you for reading and also maybe you’ll start living your life through a bit of a different lens. …and not just you @The Real Confession and @Carolynn Alvarez - LOVE to ALL OF YOU. - Happy Tiger Year!

    • @stonejackballer9519
      @stonejackballer9519 2 роки тому

      @@AIvey 'o

  • @1v1qsns
    @1v1qsns 2 роки тому +135

    So sad man. He’s such a normal dude he’s just so trapped and he’s smart enough to be aware of it. Just helpless. I hope he finds his way out. Godspeed

    • @pricklycatsss
      @pricklycatsss Рік тому +1

      Crazy how he went straight to crack that definitely doesn't help. Most people have a somewhat gradual progression from just trying things here and there and then getting more and more into it over time. This man went straight for the most addictive thing possible. I'm kind of surprised he didn't know what crack was with all those anti-crack ads in the 90s.

    • @Alienspecies635
      @Alienspecies635 Рік тому

      This is literally like 90% of addicts. It’s not like we don’t know and aren’t aware of what we are doing. A lot of functioning Normal people that just have a terrible addiction whether it’s uppers or downers.

    • @eligreg99
      @eligreg99 Рік тому

      @@pricklycatsssProbably didn’t really understand what it was but knew of it

  • @THIIIIRSTY
    @THIIIIRSTY 3 роки тому +433

    The world has no idea how many of us "functioning addicts" blend almost effortlessly into the groups of people you see every day. I hope we all find out way out before we find our way underground. Best of luck to you, Patrick.

    • @marylougeorge9890
      @marylougeorge9890 3 роки тому +6

      I pray you soon find your way out. Don't give up on yourself.❤

    • @yogalyfe
      @yogalyfe 3 роки тому +4

      Agreed.

    • @kyleculpepper798
      @kyleculpepper798 3 роки тому +3

      Yep

    • @shellabella8625
      @shellabella8625 3 роки тому +6

      Sure that’s not denial? Be careful w that one.

    • @tessaanne1205
      @tessaanne1205 3 роки тому +5

      Yes! I went thru that awful cycle where I would binge then try and walk back into life like everything was fine. Its the worst!!! Awful. I have years sober but the calling still hits. And I found something sober I love so when the calling hits, I shut everything down pass off my life responsibilities and do that thing. Which is binge TV and sleep

  • @unklezed2242
    @unklezed2242 3 роки тому +360

    I'll be 20 years sober on August 15 and I was worst of the worst. Good luck!

  • @FitGalAbi
    @FitGalAbi 2 роки тому +432

    this guy is EXACTLY like how my ex was with cocaine. the speech and body language mannerisms, the tendencies, the fantasies. the only difference is that Patrick has the awareness to understand and articulate reasons why he does what he does. this helped me sort of understand my ex and empathize for the first time.

    • @masonsobel366
      @masonsobel366 2 роки тому +3

      Move on he’s with a new hoe

    • @nicolejuarez5670
      @nicolejuarez5670 2 роки тому +3

      @@masonsobel366 God dayumn that escalated quickly. 🤣 🤣

    • @masonsobel366
      @masonsobel366 2 роки тому +4

      @@nicolejuarez5670 fr idk what came over me tbh

    • @pinky882
      @pinky882 2 роки тому +14

      Patrick's description of his crack experiences, especially the sexual parts are extremely accurate to my cocaine experiences. I abused coke heavily for a few years and that's exactly how I felt every time. I also lost a job on a three day coke bender after I had been off coke for almost 10 years, then one night at the bar someone gave me a bump and a free couple of grams... that was that.

    • @mamabear1211
      @mamabear1211 2 роки тому

      @@alanw4935 yes technically but you can’t compare the 2…
      Cocaine is more social, crack is more of a “shut the blinds and lock the doors” kinda high

  • @harryismystyle
    @harryismystyle Рік тому +28

    “I want other people to love me because I don’t love me”
    Broke my heart. Rooting for you Patrick

  • @shannontilton6720
    @shannontilton6720 3 роки тому +148

    He literally is one of the most honest interviewees you have ever had he is giving you gut-level honesty all his toxicness is pouring out of him good video

    • @matthewazuh2180
      @matthewazuh2180 3 роки тому +5

      toxicity

    • @birdmandrugstories
      @birdmandrugstories 3 роки тому +2

      @@matthewazuh2180 Check out birdman drug stories on UA-cam too🦅

    • @bradley617
      @bradley617 3 роки тому +1

      Except saying Harvard extension school is “Harvard”. It’s a certificate program not entrance requirements. And spending 15k a month bullshit... he would be homeless and couldn’t afford that on 6 figures. Not buying it at all

  • @shelby5t1
    @shelby5t1 3 роки тому +208

    I want him to win over crack. Such an honest and loveable soul.

    • @elcid8889
      @elcid8889 3 роки тому +1

      LMAO 🤣😆😂🤣

  • @jolenesmoove
    @jolenesmoove 3 роки тому +269

    I really appreciate people like him who are willing to go out to the wild frontiers of the human experience and report back to the rest of us. Hopefully this video will help others. Hopefully he finds some peace.

    • @BobbyGeneric145
      @BobbyGeneric145 2 роки тому +6

      Gonzo journalism.

    • @hypnotoad885
      @hypnotoad885 2 роки тому +5

      Just had to drop in 8 months later and say how much I love the quote "the wild frontiers of the human experience", what an awesome way to put that.

    • @stevee.7419
      @stevee.7419 2 роки тому

      @@BobbyGeneric145 This is definitely Gonzo journalism.

  • @roryslaine7896
    @roryslaine7896 2 роки тому +72

    I've never done crack, but I'm a massive alcoholic. I've been drinking a litre of rum and 12 beer every single day for like the last 3 years. I can't remember the last time I was properly sober. The way this guy speaks is so spot on. He's incredibly self-aware for being an addict.

    • @jppitre
      @jppitre Рік тому +17

      Hey man, I dont know you but I hope you're doing okay. If you haven't gotten a chance, check out Patrick's newest interview with SWU.

    • @mollyringwerm9224
      @mollyringwerm9224 Рік тому +1

      wishing you healing and blessings

    • @kellychristensen4059
      @kellychristensen4059 Рік тому +2

      Praying for you Rory!! I'm in AA and there is hope!!

    • @shawnahathaway4762
      @shawnahathaway4762 Рік тому +4

      Please, please ...get the help you need. That was my life-long best friend in whole wide world's diet too (except she preferred vodka) at year 4 she suddenly became very ill, was put in a medically induced coma - on life-support. We lost her. She was 45 years old, left 3 beautiful children without their mother. She never dreamed it would actually affect her, especially so quickly - PLEASE get help. You physically can not stop on your own. Please 🥺

    • @cl5193
      @cl5193 Рік тому +7

      I see comments like yours every once in a great while. I always check the name to see if it's my son. I want it to be him. It never is. I just want to know he's still alive. I cry.

  • @ikofire1
    @ikofire1 3 роки тому +410

    you can see his buzz gradually diminish during the course of the interview, his mood gets more and more dark.. That drug is clearly short acting. poor guy.
    Pray for him

    • @ottovonbismarck6310
      @ottovonbismarck6310 3 роки тому +22

      It starts wearing off in seconds.

    • @awilson816aw
      @awilson816aw 3 роки тому +2

      Just saying sup to a fellow Drummer.

    • @jamesbond8540
      @jamesbond8540 3 роки тому +18

      @@ottovonbismarck6310 yeah but the withdrawl gradually builds, so it’s more like he’s at baseline at the start and begins declining. I dont think he was super high or anything at the beginning

    • @vansdan.
      @vansdan. 3 роки тому +9

      yea its even shorter than cocaine powder. which is already stupid short. im never touching rock.

    • @parviusx9308
      @parviusx9308 3 роки тому +3

      Shit wears off like 5 mins it’s not even worth it

  • @Eileo50
    @Eileo50 3 роки тому +72

    He’s addicted to making himself not feel like himself it’s not only the crack the crack is just a symptom he will always indulge in things until he does work on himself. Admired his honesty if your honest your in with a chance of recovery I wish him well x

  • @brielleanyez7113
    @brielleanyez7113 3 роки тому +57

    I just want to give this man a hug and tell him everything is going to be alright. My husband died 11 years ago of a drug overdose. These are not bad people, they are sick, hurt, and in torment.

    • @TheJimburke
      @TheJimburke 3 роки тому

      you would probably be lying to him. i don't think hes going to be alright

    • @alicekranyk4173
      @alicekranyk4173 3 роки тому +1

      @@TheJimburke Watch his most recent video

  • @buckfiden156
    @buckfiden156 2 роки тому +441

    He looks like the best undercover cop who ever existed

  • @_.Sparky._
    @_.Sparky._ 3 роки тому +252

    Wow one of the best interviews. The man has a depth of understanding about this situation and is able to articulate his sense of utter despair with such honesty.

  • @waynemontpetit8181
    @waynemontpetit8181 3 роки тому +377

    Anyone that doesn't believe in the disease model of addiction needs to watch this.
    NO ONE would do this over and over again if it were just bad choices.

    • @anthonyberardi8904
      @anthonyberardi8904 2 роки тому +9

      @Maximus Meridius you’re the most ignorant person in the world if you believe that.

    • @anthonyberardi8904
      @anthonyberardi8904 2 роки тому +2

      @Maximus Meridius I guess you’ve never been dopesick before throwing up and shitting your pants.

    • @drewjason1992
      @drewjason1992 2 роки тому +2

      @maximus meridius way to speak the truth, to many people are fooled into thinking this is a disease.

    • @drewjason1992
      @drewjason1992 2 роки тому +1

      @@anthonyberardi8904 This comment proves you do not understand what you're talking about, being dope sick from having used has nothing to do with addiction being seen as a disease or illness. Im telling you young one read the book addiction is a choice then come back and talk.

    • @anthonyberardi8904
      @anthonyberardi8904 2 роки тому +2

      @@drewjason1992 well it doesn’t matter to me what you think about the subject. I know who I am. Been doing subs everyday for the last 8 or 9 years and I’m only gonna live once so I want to feel good and be happy as much as possible. Life’s too short to be miserable lol

  • @SS-ps6mg
    @SS-ps6mg 3 роки тому +240

    Everything he said about crack and sex is the same with meth and sex. It opens a Pandora's box of lewdness, nastiness, and depravity that hooks you like a fish on a pole. I know the struggle, and I pray Patrick you find peace, brother. You are still here and have so much to give.

    • @davemchugh6915
      @davemchugh6915 3 роки тому +25

      Found it extremely interesting that his binges and sex acts while on a run almost exactly mimic the abuse he experienced as a young child 4-5, with woman who were older, and the experience being almost the same while high🤔makes me think how the two are ultimately connected

    • @maylinosborne3156
      @maylinosborne3156 3 роки тому +15

      They are both the devil

    • @tfs203
      @tfs203 3 роки тому +3

      It happens with many of us. I know my childhood, had alot to do with how I felt about myself, and why I turned to drugs for decades.

    • @Otherself
      @Otherself 3 роки тому +4

      They really do go hand in hand. It’s a pinnacle of ectasy. So interesting and so alluring

    • @luishernandez-ji1nb
      @luishernandez-ji1nb 3 роки тому +3

      To this day I don’t crave regular sex but let me do a hot rail and I’ll be be gone for months on a terrible meth and sex binge it goes hand in hand for me I can’t smoke or do meth without getting stuck for days having sex

  • @justincase8160
    @justincase8160 2 роки тому +31

    I’ve learned more from this than all his other interviews. When you see how a person behaves on drugs, it teaches you so much more than a sober person could.

  • @gudgengrebe
    @gudgengrebe 3 роки тому +235

    This guy IS loveable ... he’s truthful, insightful and decent and totally honest .. what’s not to love about him?

    • @tianitra
      @tianitra 3 роки тому +6

      He is !!

    • @carleycowski
      @carleycowski 3 роки тому +5

      So true !

    • @mariebernier3076
      @mariebernier3076 3 роки тому +7

      Yes. So true of a lot of people who don't love themselves.

    • @tianitra
      @tianitra 3 роки тому +4

      He can't see himself even with all his abilities and needs help with self esteem

    • @marylougeorge9890
      @marylougeorge9890 3 роки тому +6

      Something associated with November keeps him prisoner.

  • @dimemega00
    @dimemega00 3 роки тому +621

    Mark: That will kill you
    Patrick: That would be a relief
    man.... heavy

    • @ReginaTrans_
      @ReginaTrans_ 3 роки тому +4

      I wish I could take care of him 😖😖

    • @melissawycough34
      @melissawycough34 3 роки тому +5

      Heart sinking...

    • @phoenixzappa7366
      @phoenixzappa7366 3 роки тому +8

      Lots of people feel like that. I do.
      When you get older life sucks man. The system will crush you.

    • @bmarcus2367
      @bmarcus2367 3 роки тому +1

      Deep asf

    • @prairiedawn7753
      @prairiedawn7753 3 роки тому +3

      Death doesn’t always seem so sad when you are so emotionally exhausted

  • @LexLifeRaj
    @LexLifeRaj 3 роки тому +78

    These videos are lessons in disguise, totally underrated, and should honestly be watched by many more people.

  • @jacobjonas6819
    @jacobjonas6819 2 роки тому +27

    I just rewatched this interview after about a year and it is just as powerful as the first time. One of the most impactful aspects is hearing Patrick’s dry swallows throughout the interview. I’ve been in the position and been around a lot of people doing cocaine and I know that sound all too well. I legitimately teared up again listening to him read out his sponsor’s text message. Fantastic job to both Mark and Patrick.

    • @jpark28
      @jpark28 Рік тому

      I was thinking that too, and then the next few days your mouth and throat and sinuses are all jacked up and it hurts to eat

  • @KynaThisKynaThat
    @KynaThisKynaThat 3 роки тому +72

    He seems like a good guy, I hope he overcomes his addiction.

  • @sunglassesron9464
    @sunglassesron9464 2 роки тому +97

    This guy has displayed more honesty in 32mins than I have seen in a long time! I wish him well with his addiction and life!

  • @banterbabe
    @banterbabe 3 роки тому +51

    This is one of the best interviews I’ve watched on this channel he was totally transparent as well as funny he’s a good guy deep down but just lacks self confidence and self belief bless him !!

  • @FOBW
    @FOBW 2 роки тому +56

    UPDATE on Patrick: NO, he's not dead. He's clean and sober ( almost 7 months). He likes to golf, a lot. He's living a decent life.

    • @Alienspecies635
      @Alienspecies635 Рік тому +1

      How do you know? A friend of mine got clean off heroin and started golfing all the time lol

    • @redtobertshateshandles
      @redtobertshateshandles Рік тому

      He plays golf. He's dead.

    • @FOBW
      @FOBW Рік тому +3

      @@redtobertshateshandles Unless he died in the last 24 hours, he's still alive. I saw him yesterday when he celebrated one year of continuous sobriety.

    • @southphillylilly
      @southphillylilly Рік тому +2

      @@FOBW how is he now ?? August 2023

    • @elizabethroberts8588
      @elizabethroberts8588 6 місяців тому

      He is now 2 years sober!! There’s a new Soft White Underbelly interview with him. He looks and sounds great! ❤️

  • @brittanyleblanc910
    @brittanyleblanc910 3 роки тому +72

    I’ve said it before on these videos and I’ll say it again, honesty is beautiful even when the truth is ugly. Patrick I see you. You’re still young, please read the comments here, re-visit with Mark, you can beat this. Sending you love and strength. I see you!

  • @annsgal2025
    @annsgal2025 2 роки тому +116

    This interview is worthy of being converted into a documentary about crack addition. I learnt so much about this tragic disease and how it leaves the addict helpless. This deserves to be elevated to the level of educational material .

    • @annamorgan5909
      @annamorgan5909 2 роки тому

      Most definitely should be educational material 💯💯

    • @amberridley4222
      @amberridley4222 2 роки тому

      I Agree with you

    • @dustyjking
      @dustyjking Рік тому

      Very well said.

    • @aleksiwilson2295
      @aleksiwilson2295 Рік тому

      it would make a good doco but this is guy is not your average crack addict, at least not where I live

  • @jessicagrover402
    @jessicagrover402 3 роки тому +151

    As a recovering addict when he read what his sponsor sent him I teared up. Man I hope he gets it together. His honesty is actually admirable.

    • @ChrisBChronisterJr92
      @ChrisBChronisterJr92 2 роки тому +2

      I want to sponsor people and volunteer my time. I’ve seen a few people die and I just want to help people. I wanna make my grandpa proud. She was an addict her whole life.. RIP.

    • @cristinaalcazar3084
      @cristinaalcazar3084 2 роки тому +1

      This is so true. I’m recovering and I see who he can become if he coulf get sober

    • @ederrocha3491
      @ederrocha3491 2 роки тому

      Timestamp?

  • @glitzydebs
    @glitzydebs 7 місяців тому +6

    What an absolutely gorgeous man. I had to watch this after seeing his update. The world is a better place for you Patrick

  • @viralbuthow000
    @viralbuthow000 3 роки тому +230

    This man's brutal honesty makes me feel even more sorry for him.

  • @borokkilee4946
    @borokkilee4946 3 роки тому +136

    Really hope he’s able to sort himself out, the self awareness makes it that much more sad.

    • @Ksb88
      @Ksb88 3 роки тому +3

      Well said!

    • @marylougeorge9890
      @marylougeorge9890 3 роки тому +2

      @@stary._.butterfly3368 💖💖💖

    • @stary._.butterfly3368
      @stary._.butterfly3368 3 роки тому +2

      @@marylougeorge9890 And back to u♥️

    • @shellabella8625
      @shellabella8625 3 роки тому +4

      The self awareness shows me there’s hope. 🙏🏼

    • @stary._.butterfly3368
      @stary._.butterfly3368 3 роки тому +3

      @@shellabella8625 there Is..Its hard to get up when u feel So Down..but IT not about how many times life And people fór that matter knock u Down,IT IS how many times u stand up♥️

  • @lotusgoddess94
    @lotusgoddess94 3 роки тому +16

    Patrick reminds me of my husband. He’s an engineer too and cracked from stress and has been trying to figure stuff out. Patrick there is a woman out there who will LOVE you and meet your needs but you have to get better first! You have so much potential and are clearly intelligent. Work a program and get back into life!

  • @indiegamespotlite
    @indiegamespotlite 2 роки тому +12

    This is the only one of these I've ever watched all the way through. Somehow the pure genuineity of this guy is powerful and emotional enough to overpower the deep sadness and pain of the story he tells, and it makes me feel for him so much....what an amazing guy. Really hope he's getting better now

  • @Riyaanreality
    @Riyaanreality 3 роки тому +52

    At the beginning of the video, I thought this is the first video where the interviewee had a stable childhood and no sexual abuse/molestation was involved, and then halfway through the video there it was. So heartbreaking. We need to protect our children. I wish him nothing but the best.

    • @tierneylogan5943
      @tierneylogan5943 2 роки тому

      The main thing I’ve noticed from these videos is how many people lie to themselves about their childhood.

    • @islabee94
      @islabee94 2 роки тому

      I thought the same. He was 4 years old, so sad and fucked up. I wondered whilst listening (I'm two thirds in now) if that's why his sex addiction is so intertwined with his high on crack state of being. Perhaps he's mostly mentally blocked from enjoying or wanting sex and paying for sex makes it feel safer and less vulnerable, and being high out of his mind increases that safe, non vulnerable feeling.

    • @kotamin6740
      @kotamin6740 2 роки тому

      yeah he mentions older girls doing things to him as a 5 year old boy & doesn't want to call it "molested"... and I know why. A teenage girl in my family did things to me from 4-5 to 8 years old & I too can't bring myself to call it sexual abuse or call myself a victim.
      Because we're taught that men cannot be victims and women cannot be perpetrators of sexual abuse. So for those who have experienced it's a mindfuck of a trauma. I spent 2 decades thinking it was me who had done something wrong and that I was born a pervert, that I was inherently dirty. And because of that you never dare speaking out about it, also for fear of not being taken seriously.

  • @AngelinaJones
    @AngelinaJones 3 роки тому +38

    My husband went to Teen Challenge. Fortunately, he is 8 years clean this month. I pray this man can someday say the same 🙏 prayers for all addicts out there!!

    • @therealbigfoot3076
      @therealbigfoot3076 3 роки тому

      Because hes a quitter

    • @007dog1
      @007dog1 3 роки тому +3

      ☝🏽that seems to be a clear troll. Dont feed into it...

    • @AngelinaJones
      @AngelinaJones 3 роки тому

      @@007dog1 totally a troll 🤣

  • @ebeneezerscrooge2942
    @ebeneezerscrooge2942 3 роки тому +190

    Those little girls messed him up man. That sucks. Childhood trauma is always there.

    • @kylieeeramirez7838
      @kylieeeramirez7838 3 роки тому +20

      Oh for sure !!!! God I swear , one of the MANY reasons I stayed home with my son and never put him in daycare or even the nursery at church....

    • @3minus3_
      @3minus3_ 3 роки тому +7

      I'm so mad at those girls. Granted, I wonder what brought them to act in that way as well, but still...a four year old boy. My heart breaks.

    • @jarvismcleniny2514
      @jarvismcleniny2514 3 роки тому +5

      They're all hurt people hurting people

    • @calbaking
      @calbaking 3 роки тому +2

      Yes the story must be deeper. The poor young girls were corrupted too.

    • @RivanaQiyanaEUW
      @RivanaQiyanaEUW 3 роки тому +2

      That's not the cause of his addiction lol.

  • @mclovin_tnt5617
    @mclovin_tnt5617 2 роки тому +20

    By far the #1 interview on this channel. I’ve watched the Patrick series 10+ times and I would love to see an update on how he’s doing!

    • @domdicenso1656
      @domdicenso1656 Рік тому

      Update: He is smoking crack in a sketchy skid row motel room getting set up to be robbed by a street walking hooker.

    • @Mel_o1234
      @Mel_o1234 Рік тому

      They just did an update!

    • @brendalynjones4576
      @brendalynjones4576 Рік тому +2

      @Mel O. wow, really, after I finish this video imma look up the new one&watch it.

  • @herelieskittythomas3726
    @herelieskittythomas3726 3 роки тому +401

    TELLING ON MYSELF WAS THE ONLY THING THAT GOT ME SOBER. Yes, I'm yelling.

    • @Kylemathews1
      @Kylemathews1 3 роки тому +8

      @Patrick Bateman I understand brolami. Ima tell you the answer, and it's the truth. Idk if you believe in God, but he's real and he knows everything about you. Ask Jesus to help you and he will. I've been stuck in the same cycle and I keep making the same mistake OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER. 15 times now with the adderall this last year. And I'm finally about to get out of it.

    • @Kylemathews1
      @Kylemathews1 3 роки тому +5

      @Patrick Bateman Jesus will sit their with you and go through the pain with you, he's been doing it with me. Literally just be like "Jesus/God, show me you're real, and tell him you need help, and he will I promise you.

    • @Kylemathews1
      @Kylemathews1 3 роки тому +4

      @Patrick Bateman It might take a while and be a long process, but little by little you'll be able to grow out of it. Look for narcotics anonymous or alcohol anonymous.

    • @Kylemathews1
      @Kylemathews1 3 роки тому

      @Patrick Bateman This is coming from a long time agnostic/atheist also btw, until only a couple years ago.

    • @Emorydawn830
      @Emorydawn830 3 роки тому

      ME TOO!!

  • @lams1013
    @lams1013 3 роки тому +55

    Attractive in so many ways, but so lost...doesn’t see his potential. Love and light to you! ❤️

    • @higirlhigh
      @higirlhigh 3 роки тому

      lams1013 I was thinking the same :(

    • @elmairkdfienfbfmdk
      @elmairkdfienfbfmdk 3 роки тому

      Yeah he so beautiful 4 me

    • @bobshenix
      @bobshenix 3 роки тому +1

      He's too busy being disgusted with himself to see his potential!!

  • @msaunsha
    @msaunsha 3 роки тому +58

    This is a very honest, and highly intelligent guy who would be able to soar in life, if he only could learn his worth and kick this horrible addiction. Sending prayers up for you, Patrick. I’m rooting for you, and I’m sure many others viewing this are as well. Thank you for being so transparent with us. I hope it helps get you on a journey to recovery. Don’t give up. 💗

  • @randyGelectromusicwrldwide
    @randyGelectromusicwrldwide 2 роки тому +6

    This guy is one of the best I've ever heard..... incredibly honest. Wow. God Bless this man please in all of his affairs.

  • @brettbanta2100
    @brettbanta2100 3 роки тому +578

    Man, I want this guy's job, where you can miss 6 weeks of work on a crack binge, and come back to work like nothing happened. What a gig

    • @jets8991
      @jets8991 3 роки тому +56

      Especially a city job!!! Wtf!!!

    • @likearitual
      @likearitual 3 роки тому +23

      Mind blowing

    • @MayorMcheese12
      @MayorMcheese12 3 роки тому +35

      It's probably good educational background

    • @midnighttokertruthseeker2178
      @midnighttokertruthseeker2178 3 роки тому +25

      I've had a job like that where i would get all fuxked up on pills and evertything above for about a month an some straight then just show back up

    • @danevertt3210
      @danevertt3210 3 роки тому +6

      @@midnighttokertruthseeker2178 doing what???

  • @ethancramer2674
    @ethancramer2674 3 роки тому +375

    I never comment on videos but this is so heartbreaking. As a 19 year old I am happy to be educated about drugs such as this so I can stay far far away from them.

    • @charliehobson33
      @charliehobson33 3 роки тому +17

      Alcohol is also a drug and can be insidious. Well done for educating yourself :-)

    • @quattrobajeena135
      @quattrobajeena135 3 роки тому +16

      Please stay away worse mistakes of my life

    • @shannonfountain7172
      @shannonfountain7172 3 роки тому +5

      YES!!

    • @dustinbaker2500
      @dustinbaker2500 3 роки тому +15

      As a 38yr man that grew up in the hood in the era when dope dealing, gangbanging, partying, skipping school, criminal activity was a hobby, I'm very glad to hear your opinion on the subject and wish you and your peers,the next generation of young minds success and the wisdom from watching the older generations fall,learning from our mistakes and the consequences of our decisions we made when we were growing up. Raised by music,peers, tv;rap videos promoting everything negative making money off selling dope and killing ourselves for popularity and power to get the bag of bling,the diamonds, the flashy cars,girls....what it didn't show was the real sacrifices of that life...no friends, they use...no family,unsafe or death,prison, lonely, life always at risk because they see you coming up, they will take it from you...your own people. The police always on your ass. If they legalize all of it and educated people on it,they would make better decisions, minimize the risks,change minds,become more responsible and make educated choices to use or not. Prohibition didn't stop alchohol. Drug war,hasn't been won,well...drugs won. It should be an open door to use or not,to get help or not,to change your life or not. No one should be able to tell you what you can or can't do to your own body. Family should support you and be there if you get stuck and need help too. Live life,u only have one.

    • @chasityt8518
      @chasityt8518 3 роки тому +1

      Amen !!!

  • @alison4316
    @alison4316 3 роки тому +97

    My ex was a lot like this guy..... especially after taking a hit, wanting sex _immediately_ and not be able to...but it was my fault. Crack is a useless drug (I mean, they _all_ are, but crack is _especially_ useless). It's an instant of euphoria, ten seconds. Until the next hit. I cannot imagine where I'd be right now if I'd had a good job when I was smoking crack. Phew. I really, really hope this guy gets to a point when he's like, no, I'm done. This level of honesty bodes well for his recovery......though he seems to know his cycle pretty well.
    Man, Patrick. You're a helluva dude. I hope you can get out of this.

    • @Boobookwys
      @Boobookwys 3 роки тому +3

      Best comment

    • @blairjohnson6014
      @blairjohnson6014 3 роки тому +4

      This guy that I used to get high with used to say that “crack is the best feeling in the world immediately followed by the worst feeling in the world.” RIP Patrick.

    • @CovertCrow
      @CovertCrow 3 роки тому +1

      @@blairjohnson6014 yup, basically instant euphoria for 30 seconds followed by an hours long panic attack.

  • @billytubbs1635
    @billytubbs1635 2 роки тому +13

    I absolutely love this guys honesty and I hope he’s doing well in life. That “don’t tell them out there” you can tell he was so ashamed…

  • @jameseastwood4984
    @jameseastwood4984 3 роки тому +37

    This is exceptional content that would never have been available years ago on TV. I've watched several of these interviews, thank you for creating them.

  • @andrewwhite925
    @andrewwhite925 3 роки тому +99

    This guy gives every impression of a good person. Don’t be so fuckin hard on yourself man, I hope you find that chill GF one day.

  • @AllKindsOfCarStuff
    @AllKindsOfCarStuff 3 роки тому +19

    This is by far one of the best interviews I've seen imo. Please have him back for an update if possible. His honesty and how self aware he is really impressed me. I really wish him the best.

  • @Nicklpud
    @Nicklpud 2 роки тому +13

    Such a nice man, open and honest about his demons. Really hope he pulls through this

  • @bambadalam91
    @bambadalam91 3 роки тому +152

    He could help THOUSANDS of people if he could get his act together. His honesty, and the way he can explain his experience is phenomenal. If he could find the way out maybe he could lead others out too.

    • @TCTCTCTCTC
      @TCTCTCTCTC 2 роки тому +1

      Yes definitely, I see a leader in him

    • @mastersamurai7683
      @mastersamurai7683 2 роки тому +1

      He already has by doing this interview...and I suspect he laid it all out there for that reason

    • @chrisarm3047
      @chrisarm3047 2 роки тому

      Talent scout aye 😂😂😂😂

    • @123pijiras
      @123pijiras 2 роки тому

      Thanks for sharing your story I got basically the same deal got addicted to crack through prostitutes I wonder if it is possible for me to talk to you I have now being free from crack addiction for 7 years not from prostitutes though but I have definitely the same addiction and it all started right there on Figueroa downtown LA your shar is really honest

    • @123pijiras
      @123pijiras 2 роки тому

      I went through a lot of rehabs and I started going to Alcoholics Anonymous meetings and was thorough alcoholics anonymous that I got sober from drugs

  • @lostininnerspace8687
    @lostininnerspace8687 3 роки тому +38

    He’s such a cool and sincere dude. I really hope and pray that he finds long term recovery 🙏🏼

  • @dr.richblackman
    @dr.richblackman 3 роки тому +25

    WITHOUT A DOUBT THE MOST facinating character yet AND IVE SEEN THEM ALL, WE NEED AN UPDATE. BE WELL PATRICK YOU GOT THIS BUDDY YOU GOT THIS

    • @Tiny86
      @Tiny86 3 роки тому +1

      I really hope he makes it ❤️

  • @karlyncostello6902
    @karlyncostello6902 Рік тому +9

    I haven’t done crack for 15 years ,it was so hard to get off of.I am depressed and it has been crossing my mind more and more to drink or do crack just to feel a little better .Watching this was a godsend. That euphoria for a second is followed by days of regret and anxiety and nausea. God bless him

    • @spyder_33
      @spyder_33 Рік тому

      I had an obsession for stimulants in general, but I've found crack way too quick of a high and went to snorting meth.
      Fortunately I've left that life behind but as we all (should) know, once an addict always an addict.

    • @almo33YO
      @almo33YO Рік тому

      SSRIs work wonders

  • @randomshortz17
    @randomshortz17 2 роки тому +47

    My man is jonesing hard. If youve never been on a crack binge, you dont know how hard it really is for him to sit there and have a deep conversation with one thing on his mind. I couldnt have done it

    • @ekaekemini3693
      @ekaekemini3693 2 роки тому +2

      Extremely hard

    • @johnhelton3826
      @johnhelton3826 Рік тому

      why is he moving that way? is it nervous system damage?

    • @acow9966
      @acow9966 Рік тому

      @@johnhelton3826 he's tweaking out dummy

    • @mdhcccc
      @mdhcccc Рік тому

      @@johnhelton3826no lmao

  • @brianacunningham11
    @brianacunningham11 3 роки тому +70

    He's an extremely intelligent, kind, honest, attractive guy. This is so heartbreaking.

    • @rsohlich1
      @rsohlich1 3 роки тому +5

      Hard drugs are brutal. Sad too.

  • @johnj4446
    @johnj4446 2 роки тому +22

    You can tell this man is being so brutally honest and I love it. There are so many interviews filled with lies but this one is different. I can tell he is a smart dude. Wishing him the best

  • @jesseondrumsjd
    @jesseondrumsjd 2 роки тому +18

    This is crazy! I know him. Went to treatment with him at teen challenge Brockton and played worship music with him. He is the smartest dude. This is his 4 days no sleep. When he’s firing all cylinders he’s on another level. He went to Harvard while he was working for the treatment center we went to and we would play at church he’s 3x a week. Normal people can’t handle that load and he never seemed stressed out.
    I hope he stays clean and we can hang out again

    • @jumpupanddown4God
      @jumpupanddown4God 2 роки тому +4

      Jesse! I love you bro

    • @jesseondrumsjd
      @jesseondrumsjd 2 роки тому +1

      @@jumpupanddown4God miss you man. Hope you’re doing well. Brad will update me from time to time. We still hangout and go on vacations together.

    • @lovealways729
      @lovealways729 10 місяців тому

      I agree, I think, he might also find it quite suffocating to be in this society with his intelligence both emotional and other... I used to feel the same! I am sober only a month :(. From what I hear, he is more into power, he is more into the rush and feeling of power.... that is quite addictive...

  • @DeanOrSomething
    @DeanOrSomething 3 роки тому +357

    He's swimming in self loathing, and instead of looking for land he is looking underwater for air pockets.

    • @carlaosborne160
      @carlaosborne160 3 роки тому +17

      Great imagery 👍

    • @goodegrief
      @goodegrief 3 роки тому +18

      I agree. I think he’s more like self loafing, looking for yeast to become bread when he’s already risen.

    • @DeanOrSomething
      @DeanOrSomething 3 роки тому +15

      @@goodegrief I agree. I think he’s also self clothing, desperately looking for his dirty undies when he’s already dressed.

    • @pillzbuick4109
      @pillzbuick4109 3 роки тому

      Great example

    • @Loopsrainforest
      @Loopsrainforest 3 роки тому +1

      @Raven The Warrior Goddess 22 lol

  • @mopdadd1353
    @mopdadd1353 3 роки тому +49

    The way he says you’re not going to add to his self destruction..like he knows he is gonna destroy himself either way, regardless. Praying for his recovery because I feel like it’s very possible 🖤

  • @seanvv7598
    @seanvv7598 3 роки тому +24

    Out of all the people I've seen on this channel thus far, my heart goes out to this man the most. Intelligence caught in a net and dragged down by addiction.

  • @erickahawkins1819
    @erickahawkins1819 3 роки тому +74

    "I want people to love me, because, I don't love me..." So sad:(

  • @virginiabosen1401
    @virginiabosen1401 3 роки тому +148

    This is not confusing if you’ve been through addiction. Everything he said made perfect sense to me.

    • @lardass197
      @lardass197 3 роки тому +4

      @Raven The Warrior Goddess 22 she dont want you bro

    • @gixerson8212
      @gixerson8212 3 роки тому +2

      @Raven The Warrior Goddess 22 never said he wanted you. Tf you talking about. You sit down goof

    • @gixerson8212
      @gixerson8212 3 роки тому +1

      @Raven The Warrior Goddess 22 you a guy or girl

    • @DaveGreeneramblingcarpenter
      @DaveGreeneramblingcarpenter 3 роки тому

      He's Making perfect sense to me, 2 days after my last binge,

  • @Lordfinessse
    @Lordfinessse 2 роки тому +85

    I relate strongly to this guy, but I managed to get sober, celebrating 8 years clean and sober today, also 8 years since acting out with a person/escort. Wishing you the best Patrick.

    • @sCarrieCemetery
      @sCarrieCemetery 2 роки тому +2

      @Sonfinessse Congratulations!!! Thats awesome! Wishing you continued success & sobriety! 🙌🏼

    • @americanflagwalk1935
      @americanflagwalk1935 2 роки тому +1

      Impressive

    • @soniamartinez5591
      @soniamartinez5591 2 роки тому

      Dont you ou get scare of get aids and covid please ge help you can be strong

    • @marykaminskie4645
      @marykaminskie4645 2 роки тому +1

      Congrats on your clean time. I'm 5 yrs heroin free and life will always be a biotch, high or not. Addiction costs so much more😥😒though. Sobriety is cheaper😉

    • @onemineyboi3339
      @onemineyboi3339 2 роки тому

      Dont you miss the sweet, warm, emancifying embrace of Crack?

  • @carolinefarquhar8029
    @carolinefarquhar8029 2 роки тому +6

    Thank you for giving us the opportunity to listen to this guy. I have learnt so much. Don't think I'll ever forget him. Please God he gets through this.

  • @brandizunno8943
    @brandizunno8943 3 роки тому +54

    “What I really want is to get some self-esteem and get a girlfriend or wife all that” He has ZERO self worth. He seems like the kind of person, that could do whatever he wants to if he put his mind to it, but the drugs are stopping him from doing anything!!!

  • @matts1184
    @matts1184 3 роки тому +47

    You become this self aware about addictions when youve been significantly sober and then relapse. It even makes it worse because you know what youre doing and why you just cant stop. Nothing worse than getting high thinking about sobriety.

  • @johncarratura6659
    @johncarratura6659 3 роки тому +32

    I've never seen someone with such a problem that's so self aware. I hope he figures it out, because I feel like he's got an incredible amount of potential.

  • @martymcfywilliams5725
    @martymcfywilliams5725 Рік тому +6

    he’s still so normal like. i’m not sure if it’s because he’s a functioning addict with lots of his life still or just hasn’t hit a total rock bottom but i hope he gets better. i love his personality and real/genuine composure, i can imagine him off drugs and he seems like he could have a great life with a wife and kids. all the best to him❤

  • @briangriffith4574
    @briangriffith4574 3 роки тому +82

    I feel like I'm looking at myself in this video. I was a heroin addict with an amazing job that I was somehow able to keep. Spending my time with a bunch of homeless people living in their cars just to try and get a bag. No matter how much my paycheck was I was always broke by Wednesday having to go to the pawnshop or maybe steal something. I hated that life.

    • @uglyboynat5743
      @uglyboynat5743 3 роки тому +3

      Hope you’re doing better now!

    • @CmThayer33
      @CmThayer33 3 роки тому +1

      Hope you got yourself help n are doing well. I too was a dope fiend but luckily now have over 12yrs of relapse free living.

    • @briangriffith4574
      @briangriffith4574 3 роки тому +1

      @@CmThayer33 thanks for the kind words. I've been clean since Easter Sunday 2013, went to rehab the next day. The company I work for paid for it. Best decision I ever made.