My craziest passing experience was when I was at the ER bc I was worried I had a kidney infection- it’s 3am and this doctor walks in asking me about my penis and I’m like “i’m trans” and he just went “hmm” Like I’m certain that’s in my chart lmao
I passed for over a year (got he/him, sir in public a lot) until I grew my hair out, now that it's down to my shoulders I get she/her, ma'am upon first glance in public. It doesn't bother me that much I think it's kind of funny that for cis people gender is as simple as hair length since nothing else about my appearance has changed and I have a full beard at this point
My brother has started asking me agender-related questions because he realized he's less weirded out by being "misgendered" for his long hair and more weirded out by how apologetic people are about it when he turns around and shows his huge beard.
Haha, I had the opposite experience! I'm a cis woman and got a shaggy pixie cut a few years ago. All of a sudden, even close friends were double-checking my pronouns, asking if I want to go by a different name. I was like "friends, it's literally just a haircut". It was so weird that people who were progressive enough to account for transitioning were still somehow stuck on "short hair=male, long hair=female"
My slender-framed cis husband is also referred to as she when his hair is down to his shoulders too lmfao. It happens quite a bit when he’s wearing a mask!
This is is no way the same, but I was looking through my 'baby book' (diary about me as a 1 year old) and apparently I pointed at a college student and went 'man!' (a favourite word of mine lol), and then looked again, frowned, and went 'boy...'. So that's my origin story 😂
I’ve been bingeing couch show videos this past week and it is so nice to see how confident and comfortable Gabe has become in his transition these days. Love you guys ❤
Glad you're both doing ok. Winds seem to have died down, and weren't as bad as feared, so hopefully they can get the rest of the fires under control. Still, scary stuff.
It's always weird the things people will say to you when they think you're cis. It's always a question of do I combat what they're assuming or i do I let it go because it too much to explain my whole life experience to these people.
I relate so hard to being more surprised that people read me as straight than read me as trans. I started a new job a couple of years ago and as far as I know, no one knows I’m trans, but it’s still shocking to me when they assume I’m straight and talk to me like one of the guys.
I'm a trans guy I live in Texas and wear a Texas flag baseball cap to the gym because it's one I don't care about it and people say the most buckwild shit to me
the novel I'm working on is like a slightly paranormal thing happening in modern Korea, but I just read a romcom chick lit book by Sonali Dev that has some very similar plot beats and I was just like... wait. What?? Why are these so similar even though the details, setting, end goal, and entire context are completely different? I guess that's just the human experience.
My studies is in art history, I’m actively working to get into a MA Art History program, and currently work at a museum. For the first time ever, my earbuds disconnected and the beginning phrase played out loud in the office 😂 perfect subject choice
I have a soft spot for Shakespeare in my heart ngl, A Midsummer Night's Dream is my favorite and I really enjoyed the 1999 movie adaptation (ft. Christian Bale, Michelle Pfeiffer, Kevin Kline, Stanley Tucci, and more - quite the stacked cast)
I haven’t even finished this video yet (lol), but can you guys talk about the (again) rising stigma against polyamory? I know you’ve talked about poly before, but it’d be interesting to hear :)
ALSOOOO, it’d be so entertaining if you guys read out hate comments you’ve received (usernames censored), then talk about how it makes you feel now versus back then
this isnt related to the video topic but i just wanted to comment to see if anyone else has the same issue. i watch this channel alllll the tiiiime like its by far my most watched channel but when i open youtube its never ever on my homepage of recomended videos. never! so odd!
Haha, I'm so nonbinary I was like, "Aw man, it sucks so bad that people think Gabe's cis," as if that's not something a lot of people want. I'm also trans masc but I really want to be read as androgynous or like, for people to be confused about my gender. I'm definitely usually read as a cis woman and it suuuuuucks. At the very least, I want it to be apparent I'm queer, you know? It defintiely is apparent to other queer folk so that's nice
Lool big mood! I hate when people call me trans masc. Like I get it, I'm on testosterone, but I'm not just not a man or a woman but also not particularly identified to masc or fem. If you want to make reference to me being AFAB or having a vagina or whatever you're using "trans masc" as a euphemism for, please just say that! lmao Hooked up with someone who I met on app where I had topless photos and said I was trans and nonbinary without specifying my genitals (lol) and he told me after he was surprised and had been expecting a different type of body, if that's ok to say. I was like okay to say? You've made my day!
Speaking as another trans masc person- it is very uncommon for trans people to regret their decision to transition. Most people who do detransition do it for social or safety reasons, not because they regretted their decision. Trans people often weigh the possibility of transitioning for years before doing it. While I’m sure you mean no harm by this comment- it is something that trans people hear a lot and is often used by people close to us to try and convince us not to move forward, so it is best not to ask questions like this.
@@dreamsoftheend this is a common misconception! because detransitioning due to regret/change in gender identity can be used to fuel transphobic rhetoric, those stories get far more traction. If you look at research on the topic it shows that the majority of detransitioning happens from external pressure. There are others but the study I pulled up shows that only 15.9% of subjects who detransitioned did it for internal reasons, vs reasons like safety, societal pressure, or family issues. The study is called "Factors Leading to “Detransition” Among Transgender and Gender Diverse People in the United States: A Mixed-Methods Analysis" if you would like to look it up (I tried to link it here but I think that caused my comment to be deleted)
I think there's always the potential to regret life decisions, and transition can be (...is) a major life decision. So, I've known a lot of trans people to arrive at a place of "I will make the choices that feel right to me now, and pursue what makes me happy now, and I'll do the same in the future." It may be that how we feel in the future isn't aligned with how we feel now, but if we make decisions that we can stand by, it becomes a lot easier to face the possibility of regret. I also have heard from detranitioners or multi-transitioners who are navigating that new phase with a lot of grace, including navigating feelings of grief or regret. I think that connection between trans people and and detrans people is really important. Some detrans people feel like they never were actually trans, and some feel like they were or aren't any more - there are a lot of complicated ways to feel and talk about it, but if being detrans means living with a body that isn't quite how you'd like it to be... Well, trans people have a lot in common there. And I think we can learn a lot from letting go of certainty. I don't know how what will happen tomorrow, I just do what seems right today and try to stay open to what's next.
"oh they had men's softball?...they did not".... love you both!
I aspire to the level of chillness Allison's dog has
My craziest passing experience was when I was at the ER bc I was worried I had a kidney infection- it’s 3am and this doctor walks in asking me about my penis and I’m like “i’m trans” and he just went “hmm”
Like I’m certain that’s in my chart lmao
I passed for over a year (got he/him, sir in public a lot) until I grew my hair out, now that it's down to my shoulders I get she/her, ma'am upon first glance in public. It doesn't bother me that much I think it's kind of funny that for cis people gender is as simple as hair length since nothing else about my appearance has changed and I have a full beard at this point
I'm a large, muscular cis man who still gets called ma'am 3 times a day specifically because I've got hair down to my waist.
My brother has started asking me agender-related questions because he realized he's less weirded out by being "misgendered" for his long hair and more weirded out by how apologetic people are about it when he turns around and shows his huge beard.
Haha, I had the opposite experience! I'm a cis woman and got a shaggy pixie cut a few years ago. All of a sudden, even close friends were double-checking my pronouns, asking if I want to go by a different name. I was like "friends, it's literally just a haircut".
It was so weird that people who were progressive enough to account for transitioning were still somehow stuck on "short hair=male, long hair=female"
Truly
My slender-framed cis husband is also referred to as she when his hair is down to his shoulders too lmfao. It happens quite a bit when he’s wearing a mask!
I like the apothecary era! This was a cool chat.
I laughed at that part
This is is no way the same, but I was looking through my 'baby book' (diary about me as a 1 year old) and apparently I pointed at a college student and went 'man!' (a favourite word of mine lol), and then looked again, frowned, and went 'boy...'.
So that's my origin story 😂
I’ve been bingeing couch show videos this past week and it is so nice to see how confident and comfortable Gabe has become in his transition these days. Love you guys ❤
"well as a blonde" 😂
Glad you're both doing ok. Winds seem to have died down, and weren't as bad as feared, so hopefully they can get the rest of the fires under control. Still, scary stuff.
"jesus christ - and he will find me a love" is a big lol
Hehehe
Gabe, I can't believe you're wearing a blink-182 t-shirt, you truly are my comfort millennial
It's always weird the things people will say to you when they think you're cis. It's always a question of do I combat what they're assuming or i do I let it go because it too much to explain my whole life experience to these people.
Wow! Congrats! I’m just now finding out about the transition! 💓
Omg I watched Just Between Us YEARS ago and had no clue I was clicking on one of your videos again
"and my manager said don't do that" lol Gabe
I relate so hard to being more surprised that people read me as straight than read me as trans. I started a new job a couple of years ago and as far as I know, no one knows I’m trans, but it’s still shocking to me when they assume I’m straight and talk to me like one of the guys.
Hey, great to hear about Gabe's experiences! Just wanted to say that it was kind of hard to hear what you were both saying some of the time xx
Agreed, I turned on closed captions and still didn’t get it multiple times
Apothecary era is definitely a reference from Friends tv show lol
apothecary table!
Me, an art historian, can't wait to learn about the apothecary era ✍️✍️✍️
love seeing your videos in my feed, years in 🥰
I'm a trans guy I live in Texas and wear a Texas flag baseball cap to the gym because it's one I don't care about it and people say the most buckwild shit to me
Gabe, I love your shirt
the novel I'm working on is like a slightly paranormal thing happening in modern Korea, but I just read a romcom chick lit book by Sonali Dev that has some very similar plot beats and I was just like... wait. What?? Why are these so similar even though the details, setting, end goal, and entire context are completely different? I guess that's just the human experience.
I swear I had that blink 182 shirt back in the day
Mines signed :)
My studies is in art history, I’m actively working to get into a MA Art History program, and currently work at a museum.
For the first time ever, my earbuds disconnected and the beginning phrase played out loud in the office 😂 perfect subject choice
Maybe bi just recognizes bi or something but, Gabe, I'd never think you're straight haha
I have a soft spot for Shakespeare in my heart ngl, A Midsummer Night's Dream is my favorite and I really enjoyed the 1999 movie adaptation (ft. Christian Bale, Michelle Pfeiffer, Kevin Kline, Stanley Tucci, and more - quite the stacked cast)
3:48 not this happening to me on a regular, with people getting even more confused when they see that I have a beard. 😩
Is something new going on with the audio this video? Sounded kinda off.
Kids are smart, they know things
I love you guys sm but plssss get a better mic 🫶🫶🫶🫶
I neeeed to know more about the apothecary era
I haven’t even finished this video yet (lol), but can you guys talk about the (again) rising stigma against polyamory? I know you’ve talked about poly before, but it’d be interesting to hear :)
ALSOOOO, it’d be so entertaining if you guys read out hate comments you’ve received (usernames censored), then talk about how it makes you feel now versus back then
These are great ideas!
fix the audio pls
I was more shocked when Gabe said he was gay! Still biconic, though
this isnt related to the video topic but i just wanted to comment to see if anyone else has the same issue. i watch this channel alllll the tiiiime like its by far my most watched channel but when i open youtube its never ever on my homepage of recomended videos. never! so odd!
what job does gabe do where elderly women call him a nice young man?
worst audio every good lord
What does gabe do outside of youtube?
What is Gabe's job? So lost haha
5:00 honestly it’s giving lesbian
Haha, I'm so nonbinary I was like, "Aw man, it sucks so bad that people think Gabe's cis," as if that's not something a lot of people want.
I'm also trans masc but I really want to be read as androgynous or like, for people to be confused about my gender. I'm definitely usually read as a cis woman and it suuuuuucks. At the very least, I want it to be apparent I'm queer, you know? It defintiely is apparent to other queer folk so that's nice
Lool big mood! I hate when people call me trans masc. Like I get it, I'm on testosterone, but I'm not just not a man or a woman but also not particularly identified to masc or fem. If you want to make reference to me being AFAB or having a vagina or whatever you're using "trans masc" as a euphemism for, please just say that! lmao
Hooked up with someone who I met on app where I had topless photos and said I was trans and nonbinary without specifying my genitals (lol) and he told me after he was surprised and had been expecting a different type of body, if that's ok to say. I was like okay to say? You've made my day!
"the apothecary era"? 😜
Will his voice go lower in future?
lkj
Gabe, are you ever scared that you could regret your transition and it is too hard/impossible to reverse the change.
Speaking as another trans masc person- it is very uncommon for trans people to regret their decision to transition. Most people who do detransition do it for social or safety reasons, not because they regretted their decision. Trans people often weigh the possibility of transitioning for years before doing it. While I’m sure you mean no harm by this comment- it is something that trans people hear a lot and is often used by people close to us to try and convince us not to move forward, so it is best not to ask questions like this.
Any time ive heard a detransition story it was due to regret not safety or social reasons
@@dreamsoftheend this is a common misconception! because detransitioning due to regret/change in gender identity can be used to fuel transphobic rhetoric, those stories get far more traction. If you look at research on the topic it shows that the majority of detransitioning happens from external pressure. There are others but the study I pulled up shows that only 15.9% of subjects who detransitioned did it for internal reasons, vs reasons like safety, societal pressure, or family issues. The study is called "Factors Leading to “Detransition” Among Transgender and Gender Diverse People in the United States: A Mixed-Methods Analysis" if you would like to look it up (I tried to link it here but I think that caused my comment to be deleted)
Pretty much every major surgery has a higher regret % than transitioning does.
I think there's always the potential to regret life decisions, and transition can be (...is) a major life decision. So, I've known a lot of trans people to arrive at a place of "I will make the choices that feel right to me now, and pursue what makes me happy now, and I'll do the same in the future." It may be that how we feel in the future isn't aligned with how we feel now, but if we make decisions that we can stand by, it becomes a lot easier to face the possibility of regret. I also have heard from detranitioners or multi-transitioners who are navigating that new phase with a lot of grace, including navigating feelings of grief or regret. I think that connection between trans people and and detrans people is really important. Some detrans people feel like they never were actually trans, and some feel like they were or aren't any more - there are a lot of complicated ways to feel and talk about it, but if being detrans means living with a body that isn't quite how you'd like it to be... Well, trans people have a lot in common there. And I think we can learn a lot from letting go of certainty. I don't know how what will happen tomorrow, I just do what seems right today and try to stay open to what's next.