Love this conversation. I remember the grade 6 relaxer as well. I gave the relaxer up 14 years ago and haven't turned back since. Obviously, this is no shade to those that choose to wear one but the whole idea is you should be able to have the choice and freedom to do what you want with your hair. And personally, I just LOVE the versatility.
I'm a Black American woman who has never hated my hair. As a child, I never asked or begged my mom for a relaxer, nor did my mom ever say I "needed a relaxer." She never told me I had bad hair, she focused on teaching me what types of products work on my particular hair type. My mom and I have different hair textures. My natural hair texture is mainly 3C, with 3B at my nape, and a small area at the top/crown is 4A. I typically keep my hair 6-8 inches past shoulder length, all one length. When my hair is natural and the 3 different textures intertwine with each other, it is a mess. When I went off to college, I started to get mild relaxers every 10-12 weeks. I do this because I'm not a woman who is into getting all types of hair styles, nor do I like to spend a ton of time on my hair. It's a time saver for me, especially since I often travel overseas for my career 2 weeks to a month at a time. When my hair isn't relaxed, I easily spend double, almost triple the time shampooing, conditioning, and styling. I do not wear wigs, extensions, braids, locks, nor color my hair (nor would I ever tell another woman they shouldn't)...using relaxers is my preference. When my hair is natural, I wear it in a bun or define my curl pattern in a ponytail. I think nonBlack people and even some Black people, need to stop policing BW on how we style our hair. I've even had BW attempt to shame me for relaxing my hair because they are natural. But I also find it rather hypocritical is that I've had BW who have type 4 hair, who yes are natural, yet they wear wigs every day that are type 2 hair...NOTHING like their real texture. I even had a BW who admitted to me her hair has never retained length past her chin, yet she has worn type 2 texture wigs that are typically anywhere from 20 to 28 inches DAILY for about 8 years, yet she attempted to shame me because I relax my hair 4, sometimes 5 times a year? Make it make sense! As long as my hair is clean and in good shape and I'm not paying for what other women are doing or buying for their hair, I could care less.
The history of black hair needs to be know before having conversation. Natural or not, it's all about what you feel comfortable with and what works for your texture. Peace ✌
I also think BW need to listen each other and realize just because some of us had negative experiences or thoughts concerning our hair, it doesn't mean all of us did...yet, we should be understanding. For example, my mom did sometimes use a hot comb a couple of times a month, yet I personally didn't have a bad experience/burns. She did this when I was between 7 to 12 years old. Luckily I was the kid who didn't fidget and she was very careful, plus she didn't make the comb extremely hot. When I started getting relaxers, I never experienced burns or breakage the way quite a few BW complain about. Our hair has a diverse range of textures, thickness and porosity, so we have different needs and experiences...one size doesn't fit all.
What a great conversation! Thank you Tracy for bringing forth some of the issues that black women have to face every day. I feel like I getting to the point where I can breathe a bit more easier, however, I am not there yet, that I can EXHALE.
Love this conversation. I remember the grade 6 relaxer as well. I gave the relaxer up 14 years ago and haven't turned back since. Obviously, this is no shade to those that choose to wear one but the whole idea is you should be able to have the choice and freedom to do what you want with your hair. And personally, I just LOVE the versatility.
Love this conversation of education and love! ♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️
Don't you just love Tracy? Black women, I just love you!
I'm a Black American woman who has never hated my hair. As a child, I never asked or begged my mom for a relaxer, nor did my mom ever say I "needed a relaxer." She never told me I had bad hair, she focused on teaching me what types of products work on my particular hair type. My mom and I have different hair textures.
My natural hair texture is mainly 3C, with 3B at my nape, and a small area at the top/crown is 4A. I typically keep my hair 6-8 inches past shoulder length, all one length. When my hair is natural and the 3 different textures intertwine with each other, it is a mess. When I went off to college, I started to get mild relaxers every 10-12 weeks. I do this because I'm not a woman who is into getting all types of hair styles, nor do I like to spend a ton of time on my hair. It's a time saver for me, especially since I often travel overseas for my career 2 weeks to a month at a time. When my hair isn't relaxed, I easily spend double, almost triple the time shampooing, conditioning, and styling. I do not wear wigs, extensions, braids, locks, nor color my hair (nor would I ever tell another woman they shouldn't)...using relaxers is my preference. When my hair is natural, I wear it in a bun or define my curl pattern in a ponytail.
I think nonBlack people and even some Black people, need to stop policing BW on how we style our hair. I've even had BW attempt to shame me for relaxing my hair because they are natural. But I also find it rather hypocritical is that I've had BW who have type 4 hair, who yes are natural, yet they wear wigs every day that are type 2 hair...NOTHING like their real texture. I even had a BW who admitted to me her hair has never retained length past her chin, yet she has worn type 2 texture wigs that are typically anywhere from 20 to 28 inches DAILY for about 8 years, yet she attempted to shame me because I relax my hair 4, sometimes 5 times a year? Make it make sense! As long as my hair is clean and in good shape and I'm not paying for what other women are doing or buying for their hair, I could care less.
Thank you for sharing that, I love your story and points of view
The history of black hair needs to be know before having conversation. Natural or not, it's all about what you feel comfortable with and what works for your texture. Peace ✌
I also think BW need to listen each other and realize just because some of us had negative experiences or thoughts concerning our hair, it doesn't mean all of us did...yet, we should be understanding. For example, my mom did sometimes use a hot comb a couple of times a month, yet I personally didn't have a bad experience/burns. She did this when I was between 7 to 12 years old. Luckily I was the kid who didn't fidget and she was very careful, plus she didn't make the comb extremely hot. When I started getting relaxers, I never experienced burns or breakage the way quite a few BW complain about. Our hair has a diverse range of textures, thickness and porosity, so we have different needs and experiences...one size doesn't fit all.
What a great conversation! Thank you Tracy for bringing forth some of the issues that black women have to face every day. I feel like I getting to the point where I can breathe a bit more easier, however, I am not there yet, that I can EXHALE.
Fantastic talk, Loved every single solitary second of IT ❤
coming out of your body. god gave me this curly kinky hair. my exact word to some people.
This is so good. Thank you
what is the obsession about our hair? I experienced her ordeal with friends, people who should know better.
Slavery then colonialism.
Yep, sounds about right!