Ask Nick - Should I Leave My Husband For My First Love? | The Viall Files w/ Nick Viall

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  • Опубліковано 25 гру 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 76

  • @Joan-COYI
    @Joan-COYI Рік тому +70

    First caller. I’m appalled that she’s not left , that situation sounds horrific and her sons are being affected. Nick you did a brilliant job with your advice. What a disgusting excuse for a man her boyfriend is. Really disturbing call and I hope she gets her dad involved immediately. Please show your dad this video.

    • @CrowdFave
      @CrowdFave Рік тому

      I think she inadvertently made him seem like a monster. I think she was capping on the whole recording her struggles scenario.

    • @marla-singer
      @marla-singer Рік тому +8

      @@CrowdFavethat is a very odd take. what part of the call made you draw that conclusion?

    • @CrowdFave
      @CrowdFave Рік тому

      @marla-singer the fact that she couldn't recall the comments her bf made after his friend on the other end of the call called him out for recording her struggling. Seems like a response you'd remember. That and the action of him recording her and telling his friend is on some weird shit.

  • @nicolei5196
    @nicolei5196 Рік тому +40

    the greatest thing my mom ever did was leave my dad. It gave me and my brother so much peace knowing we didn't have to worry about dads temper towards us or my mom anymore. People need to divorce!!

  • @phoff783
    @phoff783 Рік тому +32

    First caller- GET OUT. Nick is right and honestly he sounds so cold I’m worried he literally could lash out on you and physically hurt you. He sounds completely void of empathy. Protect your children. Get your ducks in a row and get out. Tell everyone about who he is. Gather your community, they will support you. Thankfully you aren’t married so you won’t have to go through the legal shit show - besides a custody agreement.

  • @embeth446
    @embeth446 Рік тому +26

    I very much appreciate Nick’s rant after the writer inner. Casual sex has consequences, and I see Nick more and more reminding people that sex positive and hookup culture and “focusing on what’s best for me” can go too far, and it certainly has.

  • @bdeveau3
    @bdeveau3 Рік тому +23

    Oh man. My heart goes out to the first caller. Girl I promise you there’s so much better out there than this. “Why does it burn when my girlfriend touches me?”?!?!? 💔💔💔 wishing you the strength to get through this and a wonderful life with your family

  • @kenna_rich
    @kenna_rich Рік тому +28

    Wow heavy ep! Say what you want about Nick, but he gives great insight and really handles these hard situations with logic and grace.

  • @rebi3867
    @rebi3867 Рік тому +20

    Great to have Amanda back, we’ve missed you!

  • @euridicecuesta
    @euridicecuesta Рік тому +11

    18:52 cheers to Nick for sharing some of the realest relationship advice that needs to be said on the internet. Allison, she has the right intentions but she’s trying to soften the blow .. life doesn’t work that way.

  • @acd1168
    @acd1168 Рік тому +19

    First caller, he resents you for getting pregnant so quickly and he has trauma. You are his punching bag like Nick said. He is also a sociopath. Leave!

  • @Jordiepoo
    @Jordiepoo Рік тому +11

    My heart goes out to the first caller. She sounds like such a sweet soul. I pray she gets out of this situation. Her man sounds like such a bully. And it’s not going to get better ❤️‍🩹

  • @kellystewart9291
    @kellystewart9291 Рік тому +9

    Third caller: the man is exhausted from trying to keep you entertained like he's a 3 ring circus! Good hell...

    • @Evie534
      @Evie534 Рік тому +2

      Exactly. It’s not his job to keep her entertained all the time. She mentioned things go from good to bad in the span of a week and at the shows how fickle she is.

  • @andreegodbout868
    @andreegodbout868 Рік тому +13

    Last caller is trying to justify her affair. You have a family and when you cheat on your husband, you cheat on your family. Grow some balls and leave your husband if you're not happy. Having an affair is not cool at anytime, but especially when you have kids.

  • @embeth446
    @embeth446 Рік тому +16

    The selfishness to be like “I keep telling my husband what I need!!!”while simultaneously having an emotional affair with another man. What about your husband’s and children’s needs? Like maybe a wife who hasn’t been keeping a second option in the background since day 1. People are so narcissistic these days.

    • @0104blackpearl
      @0104blackpearl Рік тому +1

      No accountability. She doesn’t deserve him

  • @JeniferMorris789
    @JeniferMorris789 Рік тому +8

    The caller who wants to leave her husband: I have no words.

  • @stack.attack27
    @stack.attack27 Рік тому +13

    I relate with the 1st color so much as far as helping with the babies. When our son was 10 months old he refused to help carry anything. There was one instance where I was carrying my son, the diaper bag, and my purse while he walked past holding nothing and not offering to help. His brother called him out asking him to help with his child. After 2 kids and his behavior not changing I'm happily single from him for over 2 years now. It's not worth it, girl ❤

    • @stack.attack27
      @stack.attack27 Рік тому

      *caller

    • @Joan-COYI
      @Joan-COYI Рік тому +1

      That’s great news Stacy I’m so happy for you having the strength to get out. Life is short. I hope the caller leaves him immediately it sounds such a toxic relationship

  • @andreegodbout868
    @andreegodbout868 Рік тому +11

    Amanda, you don't have to try to be the good guy all the time. Nick gives great advice, and you don't always have to try to soften the blow. Let him do his thing, he knows what he is doing without being unkind. Some people do need a bit of that "tough love" approach, if you even want to call it that.

    • @topofthemorgan
      @topofthemorgan Рік тому +5

      It seems to me like this might be part of her actual job. I think Nick wants there to be a “good cop” to soften things. Maybe it’s just part of her personality but I think it goes beyond that and that Nick encourages it.

    • @yakatya539
      @yakatya539 Рік тому +1

      I think Amanda always poignantly adds a few words that need to be said and I love her for it

    • @0104blackpearl
      @0104blackpearl Рік тому

      Perfectly said.

  • @lindsaymills481
    @lindsaymills481 Рік тому +9

    I’ve never ever commented on social media/podcasts but was compelled to say for the first caller that I have never agreed with Nick more! As extreme as it may seem to say to break up and leave, this guy has huge contempt for her and women in general and if she doesn’t do it for herself she needs to do it so her boys don’t grow up to be like their dad.

  • @jillianphoenix3270
    @jillianphoenix3270 Рік тому +7

    Wow this was an excellent episode!!! Tough topics but really fantastic advice by Nick!

  • @irakohler5591
    @irakohler5591 Рік тому +6

    1st caller...so disturbing and sorry for her. Great advise Nick.

  • @olgacotto7915
    @olgacotto7915 Рік тому +5

    First caller is lucky not to be married to her partner. She deserves better.

  • @kristakdahl
    @kristakdahl Рік тому

    First caller, I am sending you love and strength. Your situation sounds so hard and painful, You can find better, I am rooting for you to have a beautiful life!

  • @samiyan8081
    @samiyan8081 Рік тому +1

    The first caller has the same exact relationship as i had with my ex husband. PLEASE LEAVE . HE WILL NOT CHANGE

  • @annabelnavejas
    @annabelnavejas Рік тому +3

    The way I look forward to your podcast!!

  • @rebeccah7306
    @rebeccah7306 Рік тому +13

    First caller- its not favorable to split with kids. But it’s important for kids to grow up with happy parents, and very important for boys to grow up being taught in how to treat women.

    • @sandralinke9150
      @sandralinke9150 Рік тому +6

      Ummm it’s not favorable to stay together for kids and this guy is NOT CHANGING
      God I hope she gets out

    • @winks5813
      @winks5813 Рік тому

      ​@@sandralinke9150this!!! Mom needs to be happy to be a good mother.. not saying she isnt.. but to be our best during parenting we need to be our best individually.

  • @Lizaw4022
    @Lizaw4022 Рік тому +6

    First caller, that is the opposite of relationship goals. That is my nightmare. You deserve better and he doesn’t deserve anyone at all until he grows up which he won’t until you actually leave

    • @Lizaw4022
      @Lizaw4022 Рік тому

      Oof. I typed that before even finishing their convo. Girl get out lol

  • @Ashley-me3yf
    @Ashley-me3yf Рік тому +2

    I stuck around for 10+ years too long! Nicks advice is perfect! You’ve got to do the hard thing and move on from him!!

  • @dr_power.
    @dr_power. Рік тому +1

    We are Roman Catholic and were married by a priest in a Catholic Church. We had to say standard vows. But we were allowed to compose something to each other that we said AFTER our vows. It was really beautiful doing it that way. Our words to each other followed walking up to the altar and symbolically lighting one candle. I did sneak in a tiny modification during the standard vows. Our priest smiled at me, and married us anyway🤗

  • @JayEhl-gl8rk
    @JayEhl-gl8rk Рік тому +1

    Babe wake up the new Ask Nick just dropped!!

  • @Ashley-me3yf
    @Ashley-me3yf Рік тому +3

    First caller- I am triggered! She needs to LEAVE IMMEDIATELY!!! He’s always going to be like that and not change. She deserves true love! He knows that he’s her financial crutch so he’ll always do whatever he wants to do!! Please girl, do your kids a favor and yourself, leave!!!! There’s always light at the end of the tunnel!

  • @fsavis6
    @fsavis6 Рік тому

    Writing your own vows is a talent and not everybody can do it in comfort. I might be able to do it, but I wouldn’t want to. If that makes sense. To me, it’s more important about the act of getting married, then what I say in the moment. But, with that said, to be able to write your own vows is awesome.

  • @cieraconner5537
    @cieraconner5537 Рік тому

    I am listening to this episode now & I just had to come & comment to the first caller. I really hope she leaves. From my own personal experience I know this will not get better & will only get worse. If you are reading this, the best thing you could ever do for your kids is leave. Please utilize the resources you have & get out. You are not safe & I pray you find the strength to get away from him. You & your children will be so much better off. I hope we get an update from you that you have left. Sending you all the love & strength ❤️

  • @AK-jd7td
    @AK-jd7td Рік тому +2

    The write in the beginning is what is wrong with people and dating. Communicate in the beginning what you are looking for.

  • @Kloves818
    @Kloves818 Рік тому +2

    Third caller: All things aside, if he wanted to be with you he would've found the time. It's crazy that she feels somewhat like a now or never because he's about to get married. So much so that she's willing her prematurely divorce her husband just have a chance with him. He would not and DID NOT do that for you when you were engaged because he knew you would never leave him. That says quite a lot.

  • @RaySoMoney
    @RaySoMoney Рік тому +1

    First caller: it gets SO much better! Get a custody lawyer, get your stuff together, and leave. I left my husband and am now with a loving, wonderful partner. It’s not worth waiting for someone to be the person you want them to be.

  • @mmeshke
    @mmeshke Рік тому +6

    I love the podcast but can you find some other name than “writer-inner?” 🤦🏼‍♀️ Our listener? Something.

  • @lisadee1623
    @lisadee1623 Рік тому +1

    Caller #1: break up with this guy ASAP, he’s treating you horribly. His life partner and mother of his children should be the person he cherishes most in the world. It almost feels like he’s trying to be so mean that you break up with him so he can blame you for ending things even though it’s what he wants too.

  • @jillianphoenix3270
    @jillianphoenix3270 Рік тому

    Had a full Catholic wedding mass, and we were not given the option to say our own vows. I’m also a wedding planner and have never seen people recite their own vows during a Catholic wedding mass!

  • @heatheraggus7501
    @heatheraggus7501 Рік тому

    I think when people write their own vows...its often revealed that they aren't very good at it! I would be inclined to get creative with the toasts instead. :)

  • @sandralinke9150
    @sandralinke9150 Рік тому +2

    BOTH of these women need to move on. It’s amazing what women put up with OVER AND OVER (& I’m guilty of this as well)

  • @Megan-1234
    @Megan-1234 Рік тому +1

    First callers “man” is absurd! He’s a boy! She needs to get out now. It’s not worth it! I was married to a dick for years and am now married to an amazing man who’d drop anything for me. I promise they’re out there! It’s hard to leave but once you find a real man, you’ll be sooo happy you left and you’ll look back to these days wondering how you didn’t leave sooner! She’s not understanding, she’s a pushover and needs to run now before it just gets worse! Because it will.

  • @aprilc6982
    @aprilc6982 Рік тому

    5:55 Mike married Phoebe, not Janice, Nick, c'mon! lol

  • @beccalynn9376
    @beccalynn9376 Рік тому +1

    They must pay a ton of money to promote these bc I’m not subscribed and videos from this channel keep auto-playing!

  • @monikablue5068
    @monikablue5068 Рік тому +1

    First caller is with a control freak. Get out before he does harm to you.

  • @TheFrancoPhiler
    @TheFrancoPhiler Рік тому +1

    I don’t understand how these callers all end up with kids in their early 20s with horrible men…healthcare exists for a reason. Have some intuition about what is/isn’t a safe situation. “Wanting to be a mom” is a selfish reason to have to forever divide your child’s time with an asshole.

  • @JeePers007
    @JeePers007 Рік тому

    First caller, he's a horrible partner. Get out of that now! You deserve so much better and sound so loving. ❤ I'm so sorry that you've had to deal with thar asshat for as long as you have already. He doesn't deserve you and he needs therapy.

  • @Drooling_Dogz
    @Drooling_Dogz Рік тому

    First caller: he sounds like a narcissist and she is the supply. Narcissist are also very commonly nice & “empathetic” in public because he wants to LOOK good to other ppl. Also, he probably won’t change at all and won’t even recognize any fault doing of his own. 😢 😢😢

  • @mayaeldana4318
    @mayaeldana4318 Рік тому

    Second caller, he might have relationship anxiety/relationship ocd :) see someone specialized in that.

  • @matthewhardy5610
    @matthewhardy5610 8 місяців тому

    On the last caller, she hasn't mentioned the kids once. What about the impact on them? Will the first love still be attracted to a "single mother"? Most likely, not. She is so needy.

  • @fhay1
    @fhay1 Рік тому +3

    I’ve missed Amanda so much

  • @Alyson542
    @Alyson542 5 місяців тому

    To the caller whos husband is a bully, im sorry to confirm your fears but your sons are absolutely picking up on their dads bad behavior towards you and will likely continue that treatment towards you and potentially towards other women when theyre older. This is coming from someone who grew up with brothers in the same situation. Rather than seeing my mom as strong, they see my mom as a pushover and treat her disrespectfully. Youre better off leaving the guy than letting your sons see you be treated like shit by their dad

  • @eh84480
    @eh84480 Рік тому +2

    Being single does not mean having no human connection and isolating yourself to be all alone. That's called being anti-social. I think you should understand the difference.

  • @Diva1092
    @Diva1092 Рік тому +1

    First time listening to the podcast on UA-cam! Their voices don’t match the way they look.

  • @thehallucinationsgame
    @thehallucinationsgame Рік тому +2

    I feel heartbroken for the first caller... I've witnessed alot of crazy things in my life, relationships,etc. But this is BEYONNNNND, I would knock him tf out. He is disgusting... the example he's showing for his sons? EWWWWWWW

  • @katie21chesney
    @katie21chesney Рік тому +1

    I had a 2021 Catholic wedding - they would not let us write our own vows. That should have been the red flag from the get go that we shouldn't have put up w a catholic wedding.

    • @dr_power.
      @dr_power. Рік тому +1

      I hate to sounds like a prude but just to play devils advocate - marriage is a “sacrament” in Catholicism so standard vows go with that, as it is supposed to be a sacred covenant. Sounds like you’re correct -you should not have, given you don’t seem to understand the purpose behind it!

  • @pamelasaunders3736
    @pamelasaunders3736 9 місяців тому

    Nick please stop putting your foot in front of our faces..

  • @CrowdFave
    @CrowdFave Рік тому +4

    Third caller, yikes. She ain't loyal. Perfect example of a lot of modern women.

    • @embeth446
      @embeth446 Рік тому +8

      Perfect example of this “me first” society we live in. Men are guilty of it too.

    • @CrowdFave
      @CrowdFave Рік тому

      @@embeth446 agreed

    • @0104blackpearl
      @0104blackpearl Рік тому

      Generation in general