Calvinism and Girls | Doug Wilson
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- Опубліковано 7 вер 2024
- In this episode of Blog & Mablog, Pastor Doug Wilson continues his series of letters to a fictional nephew about the relationship between the sexes, this time discussing Calvinism and girls.
Enjoying this episode? Check out Doug's book, "Reforming Marriage: Gospel Living for Couples"
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Blog and Mablog is presented by Canon Press.
Enjoying this episode? Check out Doug's book, "Reforming Marriage: Gospel Living for Couples"
canonpress.com/products/reforming-marriage-gospel-living-for-couples/
:)
Calvinism is a lie from the pit of Hell.
Bizarre video -- with a smarty tohe as well. I don't endorse this.
And stay away from heretics and liars like John MacArthur and John Piper.
As a young man and only being saved just two short years ago, I have had to unlearn everything the culture here in the west has to say about manhood, womanhood, courtship, and marriage. Men like Douglas Wilson, Paul Washer, and others, have been a priceless resource for me. Needless to say I have never clicked so fast on a Blog & Mablog.
You, my young friend, are most assuredly on the right path
I recommend Voddie Baucham as well. Good stuff there. Cheers.
Paul Washer, Voddie Baucham, and Doug Wilson all have great videos on Biblical manhood!
@@justin5801
Tim Conway as well.
There's also the youtube channels AD and Conversations That Matter (ua-cam.com/users/ADRobles and ua-cam.com/users/ConversationsThatMatterpodcast ) though they talk more about other gospel matters.
As a former young woman(still a woman, just not so young anymore) I can attest that the doctrine of “The One” is a real struggle for women, too. It harmed my marriage in its early days because I actually allowed Satan to try to tell me that I had made a mistake and missed “The One”. Thank God for his grace, patience, and sovereignty over our lives. My husband and I have been married almost 19 years and are perfect for each other because of the work God has done, is doing, and will do in our life.
Do you think Katie that this has led many young women to unbiblical divorce in the church?
@@diefenbakersown i think an argument could be made that yes it has led to unbiblical divorce in the church. It makes me really sad.
Thanks@@katiesmith5149 , me too! Appreciate you posting this here for the other young women of the church to see!
@@katiesmith5149 " still a woman" 😂😂. ( Congrats on your marriage sister)
_"...The reason for our poor decisions is that we skim over the things revealed."_
Beautiful!
That, ladies and gentlemen, was an EXCELENT commentary. I am 52 and have made more mistakes then I care to remember in the matter of 'relationships' while searching for my proverbial 'missing rib'. My 'searching', as Pastor Doug so eloquently explained, was me attempting to 'direct my own paths' and claim it was God's will. So to my young men and women friends I offer some foolishly hard learned experience, re-watch this video multiple times until Pastor Doug's message fully takes hold in your mind and make Proverbs 3: 5-6 your life's guiding principles. Other than that pray, and when you get done praying, pray some more.
Let's just say contentment is found in Christ.
Make Acts 2 your guiding principle, because we could have stopped with Moses if the Law was enough.
thank you sir
This might have been girls and Calvinism but there were some really good theological lessons, thanks uncle Doug
As a 22 y/o man these videos are very valuable and greatly appreciated by me and I am sure many others. Thanks!
So many years of striving to try to find my purpose and the will of God and whatever so I’m not “wasting my life.” 😬 How I wish I’d heard this teaching a long time ago...
Right there with you sister 😂
Right here with you. 😄🙏🕊
Excellent point! There's also the problem of how this doctrine of "the one" has lead to divorce instead of faithfulness. It's deception has brought many an end to "unhappy" marriages.
this is the most liberating discussion about the will of God I have ever heard.
I honestly get so much wisdom from these little videos, I think your subtle humour with the overarching message being explicitly stated, but also implicit in the way it's worded, gives just enough mental thread for especially young men to pull on to really think for themselves about what's being said, without getting tangled up.
P.S.
I'm still waiting for my Christmas present Uncle Doug...
& If it's not a sweater vest, I'm returning it for store credit.
Love you!
Merry Christmas
This is hands down the greatest bit of dating advice I've ever heard in my life. Thank you so much.
I have been to Douglas Wilson's church and it is incredibly special. Though I unfortunately don't live in Idaho, I would love to come visit again just to come to this church. All my life I've been looking for a real, God-fearing church, and I think Douglas Wilson has that environment in his.
Where abouts in Idaho??
I too have visited Christchurch Moscow…a truly warm and blessed local body…I live about 130 mi N of Moscow, so attending weekly I out of the question, but we have begun to make friends there…
I could write a book on how feminism has affected Christian women and how we have to unlearn the secular theology we have let seep into our faith. I have Christian friends on both extremes - egalitarian/feminised men, and Anabaptist/legalistic view. Both overshoot the gender roles set out in the Bible. I have had to "work out my faith with fear and trembling" in order to understand how I am to relate to my husband/men. We are in a fallen world which means the relationship between the sexes is broken. The only way to repair it is through Christ. The Holy Spirit working on both the man and woman's hearts. That is why it is so pertinent to marry someone who shares your faith. I have witnessed several marriages fall apart because the relationship was built on this "soulmate" bull rather than Christ being the center.😞
Fortunately, you don't have to. Dr. Christopher West has already written half a dozen books on the subject!
I said in high school that I don't believe in "the one," but that there's a type of person better suited to you than others, and that you simply chose who you love and have to put in the work to make it work. There is no "meant to be," only chosing to love the one you're with and putting in the work. I got some of the biggest stink eyes I've ever received. I was kinda surprised at the reaction at the time. Now I think it's kinda funny.
The absolute truth with a touch of humor 😂 This is the way
The point about trying to figure out God's will is so important and applies not just to marriage. I don't know if he's done more on this topic, but it's really needed! Sincere, committed Christians who genuinely want to obey God struggle not just in choosing a marriage partner but with choosing a school, a career/job, where to move, etc.
8:51 The problem I see in "singles ministries" is that they claim the reason you're single is because you're not living in the will of God. The implication is that since you're single, there must be some personal, spiritual, or moral deficiency and unless you obtain your black belt in living in God's will, you'll be single forever. You see that happy 20-something couple at church? That must mean they've reached a higher level than you and so they're blessed by God. If you're single in your 30s or 40s, that means you're not at that level yet and so you're cursed and an outcast. You're just that cripple waiting for his turn to jump into the pool at Bethsaida. Another problem I see is high divorce rates in the church. Too many treated marriage too flippantly, exactly like picking a flavor of ice cream or ordering from a menu. At wedding time, the church is ecstatic for that 20-something couple because they're a shining example of "living in God's will" but once they get divorced, they move on to different churches and garner sympathy and support - at least more than the singles.
This
The church doesn’t teach people how to have successful marriages according to scripture. “Submit doesn’t really mean you have to submit”.
@dr.vonslifeinvesting6485 oh sure that is exactly what is at the core of divorces, those unsubmissive women! That's all it boils down to. Don't blame us men. Grief.
This applies to every decision taking in our daily carrying the cross living.
Super good.
I’m gonna have to watch this multiple times to absorb it all!
This is one of those videos I will need to watch several times.
Absolutely loving these fictional letter based questions, this is simply fantastic to see. Maybe there will be a theme where you then write for a fictional niece. I know, I know, it would be a hot button topic to give such advice in these times lol, but, very nice to see even still.
I keep having to come back to this video all the time
Thank you for this video pastor Wilson. As a young woman who is pursuing a godly life whether that includes a husband or not this video was very helpful.
I agree that God is sovereign, je knows everything we will do and who we’ll marry. The world sees the sovereignty of God as offensive because those who live worldly lives want to think they know everything.
God has selected the best spouse for us in his sovereignty and because of his love for us. The world on the other hand wants us to find someone who’s “compatible” with us whereas God gives each man a helpmate to spend their lives with. Paul Washer said best when he stated said something to the tune of the spouse the lord provides for us will be weak in areas that we’d prefer they be strong in.
God doesn't do the selection - we do. It may be men that select the woman they ask on a date, but the woman selects him by refusing - or not. God provides us with the choice and we make it. Our role in the marriage (as Christians) is to love one another and be submissive one to another.
Why did God make us male and female? That's one of the most profound questions there is. Paul gives us an answer in Ephesians ch. 6 - our earthly marriages are meant to be an image of the divine reality, the wedding of Christ and his bride. So, to men, the call to marriage is the call to be God's life-giving love, and to make a total gift of oneself to the bride - as Christ indeed gave his body to feed us and his blood to nourish us. For women, marriage is a call to be the dwelling place of God - like Mary when she bore the Lord in her womb - and to make a total gift of oneself to the groom - as the church must do for Christ. The man pursues and the woman receives - just as God pursues us and offers us the gift of salvation, which we must choose to receive.
God's act of incarnation - the singularly most important event in the history of the universe, involved a male and a female body- Jesus and Mary - and showed us that both sexes were created in the image of God. Not one of us who has a body can say "God doesn't love me" or "God hasn't chosen me" because the proof is fundamental, not only to _what_ you are, but to what Jesus is - a God who is incarnated, a God who is both fully God and fully human. A God who was born of a woman and nursed at a woman's breasts.
God hasn't selected a spouse for any of us, but that doesn't mean he isn't attentive to our prayers or actively working to provide for our needs. Even when God sent Isaac's servant to meet Rebekah, it was ultimately her decision about whether or not to go - and God blessed her faith richly. God lets us make the decision because he loves us - because it is the best possible expression of divine love, to give us the opportunity to bear his image and play a role in life-giving love. God lets us choose because we never become like him without choosing again and again to submit to his headship and follow his example. God lets us choose because the only way for him to give us the joy and glory that is in Christ is for us to choose to die to self and live to God until we are fully sanctified.
So there really is no comfort in the idea of "the one" and there is great comfort in knowing that God has the kind of sovereignty that respects what we choose- so that he may enable us to choose our own spouses, so that we might choose to love them submissively and sacrificially, so that we might ultimately choose to love God.
God bless you, uncle :D
Speaking here from Brazil.
Mark Regnerus's "Cheap Sex" is a book providing insight and data analysis on the (secular, American) sexual market. It's not a "Christian book" per se but it is absolutely a valuable one for Christians, because trends and ideation concerning sex from the secular culture are often all but taken for granted among evangelicals, too. Mablog fans & Doug et al: the conclusions he draws might not be new or surprising to you, but to see Regnerus pull them straight from the data without necessarily drawing on Christian/a priori principles is worthwhile.
He's given a review of the book on an episode of the Plodcast once before but I can't remember which one it was.
I love when a raw analysis of the data proves that God knows best.
I recognize that name, he's done one of the only statistically valid studies on the effects of parental sex and sexual orientation in existence, almost impossible to find online because of Big tech scrubbing
. But it revealed that positive outcomes for children go, from best to worst:
Married hetero
Single dad
Gay couple
Single mom
Lesbian couple - with this group having like a 20-fold increase in child neglect and abuse over married opposite sex parents
Love your dry sense of humor. Keeps me on my toes.
Thank you so much for this video! It clarified so much about the concept of "The One" and following the will of God. I have the bad tendency to ask what God's will is and ignore the obvious instructions He's already given, so this was a wonderful reminder of that, as well. :)
Perfect timing, uncle Doug!
Thank You Doug! You're a blessing!!! Some are even saying you're a ''modern day Luther'' ! Yep! AD Robles said so! :D
The sharp wit and pugilism yeah
Once again Doug excellent!
This is soo important and helpful!!!
Thank you. I needed this. I pray and know that God will bless you for it. HIS will...not ours.
Thank you, Pastor Wilson, for this wisdom. I am just beginning to understand the things of God and of man. May the Lord bless and keep you and your household!
I find that many women of marrying age even in the church are still influenced by the feminist idea of getting a career established before looking for a spouse. I know of one young lady who seems very intelligent (albeit strong willed), pursuing her masters degree at the age of 25. If she even has the desire to be married (I have yet to breach the subject), the fact is that she is trading in her most valuable years in which she could attract a man so that she can have a career path. Ladies, if you want to be married at ANY point in your life, be willing to adjust your plans when you run into a guy who seems to have interest in you. It only becomes harder the older we get, for both men and women. But women tend to get the short end of the stick because their peak years are in the 20s to early 30s. Call me a chauvinist or whatever other label you want, but truth is truth.
Indeed. I (a lady) got married at 21 and I'm 24 now, so glad I was married but all my fellow Christian girl friends are still studying or working and none of them are even close to getting married! One has had lots of casual relationships none of which have lasted, most of them she ended for uneccessary reasons (she's a Christian and I've told her this is wrong and I think deep down she knows it) one of them had been dating for two years and isn't engaged yet (which I also think is unwise, especially given they are both working, living independently and hanging out at each other's houses a lot) and the other two don't seem to be interested in marriage. It's hard for me, I don't know what to do or say... Do I say nothing? Marriage is so great and I'm so keen to be a mum, I don't want my friends to miss out ... But it's a hard topic :( They are all around my age.
For the life of me, I will never understand how a woman can go to the beach and proudly parade around in clothing so tiny that its combined weight is generally less than that of your average hunting bullet, and yet this same woman cries offense when inevitably she is stared at or, heaven forbid, is whistled at by a male who has failed to suppress the inevitable hormonal response generally induced by the spectacle of a mostly unclad female specimen. Whether this is hypocrisy or madness, I will leave to brighter minds to ponder.
Women don't mind being hit on.. they just don't like being hit on badly.
Whistling is stupid when she would have preferred you just walk up to her and talk to her. Staring at her is creepy only if you're not going to approach and engage her in a dignified manner. If you get rejected, oh well, but she won't fault you, she won't cry offense or whatever, if you've acted on your interests in a brave respectful way unlike the whistlers and gawkers. That's the difference.
@@jakesanders136 that is a dangerously naïve statement in today's world
I'll try to lay out my thoughts on this (haphazardly I suppose):
Short version is it's the "I can have it all" mindset. "I can get all that precious male attention AND not be/feel threatened by them!" (No, you can't.)
Where men prioritize accomplishments, women prioritize companionship. Where a man wants to do a woman, a woman wants to be with a man. And both find these attractive in each other - women are attracted to men who are moving with energy and purpose, accomplishing things, and men are attracted to women who make efforts to be affectionate and close.
(And women are also attracted to resources/money and men are also attracted to fertility and that gets talked to death and moving on)
(And, to be clear, both of these desires are in both, but not identically. Men want to do women like women want to be with men, and men want to be with women like women want to be done by men.)
So, the woman tries to get male attention, and asking why they do this is equivalent to asking why a man doesn't just stay home and do the dishes every day instead to trying to build something or win a game or otherwise try to accomplish something. A surefire way to do this is to display their fertility and good health (for as long as it is so) by showing a lot of skin. This will attract men, who will be interested in the doing (more specifically, doing her).
This is hugely threatening for the woman, in ways I haven't fully wrapped my head around (the obvious isn't so obvious here. Yes, the man is capable of raping her. Yes, this could ruin her life. But the actual problem is somewhere further down the line, and I'm not quite sure of the form of it). This is frustrating for the men, because it's a powerful urge that's far too much trouble to act on. This is nice for the men, because the woman is displaying a desire for their attention. This is nice for the women, because the men are paying attention to them.
Now, men impose on women. Men chart the course of civilization both in large and small scales. They determine the direction and carry women along. This is how things function properly and to facilitate this, women are compliant in ways that men are not. They are capable of believing lies more quickly and more fully than men. Lies like "You don't have to choose between two things, you don't have to weigh risks, you can just have it all." And they get upset when it's not how they were told it would be. But where a man would go "I was told I could have it all and I clearly cannot, so that was a lie." a women might go "I was told I could have it all, and that's not what happened, so the world is wrong." because they need to be compliant with the men above them (whoever they have determined to be above them, which these days is typically big daddy government and big brother academia).
@@jakesanders136 Women dont like being hit on by men they find unattractive. These men they call "creepy".
The solution is keep the chauvinism and laugh even harder - I love to be over 50 🤗🤗🤗
He's right these are my two favorite topics
I have to say Doug @Blog & Mablog I agree with you here. The idea that there is a "One" for us is stuff you find in Christian romance novels. I've experienced those evangelicals who think it is wrong that you might have loved another women before you met your wife. Good lesson here.
This is absolutely what I needed to hear. My pain comes in that in following God I have not been put into a situation to be able to have what I want. It's not always that by following God you have a long and prosperous life or get the things you dream about in this life. Often in making the right decisions you lose the things you personally wanted in this world.
I think the confusion for some people is that you see alot of promises for good in the Bible but also the example of Jesus being crucified. There's just some lives that will only experience darkness, die early, be raped, robbed, murdered, and snuffed out. To such people, it's hard to read the promises of good things even as the liars and thieves seem to get along well and darkness reigns.
"Though a sinner does evil a hundred times and prolongs his life, yet I know that it will be well with those who fear God, because they fear before him. But it will not be well with the wicked; nor will he prolong his days, which are as a shadow, because he does not fear before God."
The hope that we have is hidden in Christ and the idolatry of the world is too be shunned. It might not be that for this life someone will be blessed (as God is the one who grants success, not a man's efforts, yet he is called to obey and God repays), but we are not living for ourselves. When God is the center of worship, circumstances don't matter. He is worthy of all things.
This is sooo good. It’s really frustrating to hear this doctrine being preached among single guys and girls in church. It’s such a damaging doctrine and it only sends you down an unhappy and anxious path. So yess Love Gos and do what you please. Choose the one that you want, you’re the one that will have to leave with them until dead do us part
🗣💯 Powerful teaching God bless you Pastor Wilson
Uncle Doug out here dropping wisdom bombs.
Thank you uncle for the sound advice.
Brilliant observations Mr Wilson!
I like you Doug Wilson. I like your voice, I like your pace. I like some of those words you use I have to go look up. I feel like I agree with everything you say but my thoughts are kinda scattered and foggy. You focus and crystallize them. Very satisfying. Thank you.
Thanks Uncle Dough ! Love from India ♥
I would only counter that it isn't always so much "the one" but that a girl wants to feel like she is the preferred and not just the second, third, or forth choice as it may be.
I would counter that is the exact same thought of the vast majority of men today
@@brucekirk5081 You would probably be shamed for that though.
I think tht nobody wants to be second choice.
I think I can see where you are coming from. No one wants to be the one your husband "settled" for. However, I wouldn't necessarily interpret being the 'first' girl to mean the man liked her more than everyone else. It could be that she was just the one who seemed the most approachable or available. Also, understand that a man's attraction to a woman evolves over time. A man might find a woman beautiful initially, but then find her character so repulsive that he will dread the sight of her. Conversely, some men have started off as having a strictly platonic relationship with a woman, but slowly develope a romantic and sexual interest for her. In other words, initial impressions which cause a man to initiate the wooing aren't constant. He is working on limited information and availabilities, so being the 'first' doesn't mean much if anything at all. What matters is that you are his 'only'.
@@alexmanzewitsch714 👏😭
Thank you for another great video, God bless you!
Thank you pastor, Praise The LORD
Thanks Uncle.
Thank you uncle Douglas! Wisdom at its finest! 🙌🏼
Apart from the calvinism, that was great! 😄
Come to the light side, we have fecundity
@@horrificpleasantry9474 I would if I could but... ;-)
(BTW I had to look up fecundity. Never in my life! lol)
Very timely message thank you sir🙏🏻
Let me like this more than once!
Is Doug Wilson a 5-Point Calvinist? I'm having a hard time reconciling his admonition for us to "chose" wisely and all of that with the fact that, according to him, God has sovereignly and unchangeably determined whatsoever comes to pass, including my choice in whom I will marry.
I'm glad most people here are blessed by his counsel and I agree with much of what he said. But since he titled the video "Calvinism and Girls", I thought it necessary to point out that if 5-Point Calvinism is true, you have no choice in whom you will marry or whether or not you will believe in "the one" or any of that.
God intended human beings to be wise. And when Adam fell, humanity entered a state of resolute rebellion, so we became fools. “Choose wisely,” is not conceding that our choices elude the will of God, but that choosing wisely is the will of God. Since I cannot make myself wise (wisdom begins with the fear of the lord), the admonition to “choose wisely” necessarily includes the admonition to submit to God’s will.
@@_lithp But in 5-point Calvinism, I cannot submit to God unless He first changes my nature so that I desire to submit to Him. In 5-point Calvinism, the Gospel isn't enough - I need to first be changed by God before I can accept the Gospel in faith, i.e., choose Him (and all of the subsequent good choices such as the correct spouse). And more fundamentally, if I don't make the right choices in 5-point Calvinism, it's ultimately because God has sovereignly and unchangably ordained this for me.
I'm so bored by these things. I don't know what I'm doing in relationships. But I don't have a lot to offer for marriage. This video is fast, informative and gets to his points. But I'm not certain I'm the best audience for it.
But I'm not gonna ignore what he's saying.
On second thought he's probably right.
Useful insight as far as men being transactional in deciding if they want to pursue a relationship and relational when deciding if they want to marry someone, and women being relational in deciding if they want to pursue a relationship and transactional in deciding if they want to marry someone
I'm trying to envision what being transactional when it comes to marriage looks like in practice. 🤔
@@lady_bakes_a_lot1426 "does he make enough money for us to be financially comfortable? Does he have a stable job history? Is he well respected by other people? Does he have strong church or family connections/a support network? Does he have a nice apartment/house? Does he live close to me so we can visit my folks frequently? Does he have a big family? Will he relocate to where I live? Will he change careers to something I prefer? " Not saying any of these things are necessarily positive or negative, but that they're not clearly moral
@@horrificpleasantry9474 That makes sense. Thanks! So men generally don't have as many practical factors as women, when it comes to getting married. They're likely thinking of themselves as the provider (or the main provider), so they don't tend to ponder/evaluate what will be provided *to them* from a practical perspective (to the same degree, at least). How does being transactional in pursuing a relationship work? Wilson only mentioned looks here. It's also hard for me to understand how that one technically works. What does it mean in practice?
@@lady_bakes_a_lot1426 it basically means all a guy needs to know about you to be open to the possibility of a relationship is that you're pretty. If you turn out to be bad news afterward he'll just leave the relationship. That's the natural baseline for a man. Now, because of this culture, and with wisdom as he gets older, and with Christian priorities, that's going to affect a man's approach by making him more careful in init8ating, and a woman more c areful in getting attached once she's dating a guy early on. If we think that neither sex is naturally concerned about who their partners ARE initially, we can say that men are more concerned with/have high standards for how they look/act, women are more concerned with/have higher standards for what they do/provide. One's more sensual, one's more practical, but BOTH see the other person as a tool, and it is a higher order thought process to think of character and beliefs
@@lady_bakes_a_lot1426 in other words, deciding that you're pretty isn't a relational determination, it's transactional because it's something he would get, if he pursued you, and not a function of how the two of you are interacting
Wait, wait.
You're saying chicks aren't going to fawn over my leather bound 1560 Geneva study Bible?
Curse you, Babylon Bee!
Their loss.
I am learning things 30 years too late. What I was taught was the complete opposite to this message. I believed my past mentors as they were older Christian’s and surely they were right. It took 15 years of my world crumbling around to work out something is fundamentally wrong. And another 10 to find people who thought more like this message. And the last 5 trying to understand and make sense of it. Theology Matters, as there is only 1 God, 1 truth , 1 reality. Life smacks you in the head when your theology is wrong.
I'm in the same boat as you brother. I was told and believed a bunch of lies and suffered much consequence. There has been too much mysticism in our culture and little to no truth.
The good news is God will fix this mess.
My dad gave me the "100 woman theory" which is "in any town you move into, there are 100 women there that you could be happily married to.
Tulips. I see what you did there.
Philippians 4:19 And my God will supply all your needs according to His riches in glory in Christ Jesus
Oh that I knew this as a younger man. Praise the Lord I'm 28 years married, therefore living the will of God. But oh those early years...and all the false advice I took...and the false suppositions I embarked on.
But Doug...didn't you have a conversation with James White about Postmil allowing for the possibility of Grandkids where everyone else doesn't? I'm hearing a mixed message here.
As a 21 year old Single Male i needed this thank you. But i'm still struggling with that porn part though.
Stop it. Matthew 5:28-31 it’s literally killing you.
The thing about asking God what kind of ice cream to eat is so true! We need to get away from the idea that God has one fatalistic path that we must follow in every regard. That is greek philosophy, not Christian! You talked about this in terms of oneitis but usually I hear the thing about "God's will for my life" phrase regarding employment. I think it is a similar situation but there might be some subtle differences.
This is so deep.
Neo also did not believe in THE ONE.
Hey Doug, I have been watching you for a while now and really enjoy your content. Would really like to hear your thoughts on an interview I heard a while ago done by Andrew Klavan and his son. He is a political podcast host and I enjoy some of his unique takes. The episode with the interview in it is episode 1061, “the hilarious self-blindness of the left,” starting at 51:55. His son and him both claim to be Christians but his son is gay and attempts to justify his sexuality and upcoming marriage in a unique way and would like to hear your thoughts on it. Thx
I didn’t realize he was gay. Does Andrew support it?
Matthew 7:22-23
@@thetrollpatrol8799 Andrew is either a spiritual infant in this area or only intellectually persuaded but not converted.. Maybe it's too soon to tell but someone should attempt to disciple him
@@horrificpleasantry9474 Andrew Klavan is not a good political commentator or someone to go to for spiritual advice. Most of the Daily Wire isn't. Especially that Ben Shapiro. Controlled opposition that masquerades as conservative.
@@CaesarGB That's too simplistic. He trusts institutions. That's an ironic side effect of, as near as I can tell, his lack of any actual faith in a higher law/lawgiver, jewish or otherwise. He has the same 'personality type' I do- INTJ, which is known for butting heads with authorities but being nearly reverential toward absolute *rules.* The highest law I know is God, which is why I will get in trouble with human authorities who go against God's (and often their own) rules, but not because I despise authority, I just have a proper hierarchy. For Ben, he believes that if you can't trust the government institutions, then there is no basis to know any truth any longer. That's why he appeals to official statements a lot, and thus, it takes him an excessively long time to turn against the liars like Fauci, compared to someone like Steve Deace who, though a blue collar dude, is as best as I can tell a genuine born-again Christian and identified Fauci as pretty much the antichrist (not literally, but same degree of despite) by May 2020. Ben's foundation is shaky but it's not because he's pretending to be conservative or being funneled money by the Democrats. It's that he's chosen to only turn against a person or institution when the evidence for their corruption is overwhelming to the point of ludicrousness. It's a weakness and it's an excellent reason why we should receive our news, analysis and commentary from born-again Christians and not Jews OR Catholics OR atheists, no matter how brilliant they may otherwise be.
I'm not so young and I despair at finding a mate the clock is ticking at an exponential rate, loneliness is causing me to despair of life itself
I would check out all the Biblical manhood videos on UA-cam by Voddie Baucham and Paul Washer, and then tell the elders of your church the despair you are feeling and they could help you. And if you haven't yet submitted yourself to elders of a church I recommend doing that as soon as possible!
For me i realized that lonliness is just a fleeting feeling. Most of the time it caused by seeing something i know is unrealistic. I asked myself the big questions like "why do i even want a wife?" "is marriage worth it to become a slave to someone controlled by emotions?" Questions like these help me come back to reality.
@@greenghost6416 "He who finds a wife finds a good thing
And obtains favor from Yahweh."
Proverbs 18:22 LSB
@@justin5801 Also from Proverbs: "It is better to live in a desert land than with a quarrelsome and fretful woman." 21:19
"An excellent wife is the crown of her husband, but she who brings shame is like rottenness in his bones." 12:4
There are many significant distinctions throughout Proverbs between a good wife and a bad one (or bad women in general). I do not think the author intended to imply that any wife is a good thing to have or else he wouldn't have warned about avoiding the dangers of evil women or the consequences of being married to a "bad" wife.
@@CuriousGeorge13 yup, I never said any old wife is a good thing-clearly there are parameters set out in Scripture for us to follow-but our friend @Fat Boy needed to hear something from the word of God to correct him on his view of marriage which, if done according to God's will, is beautiful
Awesome.
10:23 is a great illustration 😀
we are not guaranteed husbands or wives, but we can pray for the Lord the bring us the woman ( for men ) and man ( for woman ) He wants us with. and if she comes, keep her and put God first, for every relationship is not meant to last, but our focus on Christ should last regardless. so technically there is a "one" because if we are to have a spouse, the Lord knew who that would be, and our lives were led to that point by His sovereign will. but in our vast unknowledgeable mind, you still have to be the one to make the commitment to the other person.
Is interesting....I as told when I was a young believer....this particular girl was the ONE.....and she wasn’t.....but sadly I spent long time waiting for her to come back to me.....which she never did....and this lead to lots of confusion and frustration
This is good stuff.
“Susie Q Lords choice“ … hahahahahahah
Is the one not predestined?
uncle, thank you
3:00 How does it logically follow that if a guy asks 4 girls out in a couple months that he's not in pursuit of the one? He could just be asking them out in the order he meets them and not the order he prefers them
He isn’t saying that the man doesn’t believe in The One, but rather that his methods upset those who believe in The One. The man could be doing exactly what you say, asking them out in the order he meets them and not the order he prefers them, but believers in The One would conclude this guy must be desperate and ready to settle for anyone whether they’re suited for him or not.
@@_lithp yeah I could see that but those people who get upset probably haven't met very many people who believe in the one and also went on many dates with different people to find out who the one is
0:25 - 0:30 is every Doug Wilson created non-fiction piece ever. LOL
too bad modern Protestants reject the book of Sirach, because it's got tons of wisdom about women and relationships.
Just a curious question (not being snarky)...Do you teach & believe in some type of works salvation? Do you teach/believe that good fruit (doing or not doing certain things, what one's life/lifestyle looks like subsequent to salvation is the evidence whether or not someone's saved?) The will and the work of God is just for people to believe on whom He has sent (Christ). I don't think we can know "the will" of God on all the specifics in our individual lives. We're supposed to just trust Him with our circumstances. But His "will" for us is clearly outlined, in regards to salvation (which is paramount) in these verses.
John 6:40 (the will of the Father)
John 6:29 (the work of the Father).
You need to check yourself into a hospital; the kind where they strap you into your chair"
-Doug Wilson
🤣🤣🤣
1 Corinthians 15:3-4; Ephesians 1:13; 1 Thessalonians 4:14
Churches with available women? Where?
Southeastern CT
Gotta coordinate, churches with an excess of single men and churches with an excess of single women
@@horrificpleasantry9474 😂
@@horrificpleasantry9474 I often thought the same thing but that would actually make too much sense and would be helpful.
@@johnz4328 good churches will network with others to make this happen. Mine is hosting a dance for 100 singles in the local presbytery. For example. Idk what a good Baptist alternative would be, though. Maybe a potluck 😁
Most Christian women I know don't believe in "the one." The reason the girls would think this guy is gross is that he displays, like Doug implies, spiritial maturity issues, plus little foresight into the future. He is strategizing only a little, and doesn't seem to care about how others perceive his willingness to date literally anyone who is mildly attractive and steps inside a church. Basically, he seems dumb and not serious about his faith. Girls think ahead. Guys like this tend to pull the trigger now and worry about where the bullet is going later. Not an attractive or Godly characteristic. The one doesn't exist. But what I see in many reformed circles from the men is... not going to serve them or their potential wives well in life. There is a level of careful, soberminded thought that should be put into even going on one date.
xDDDD
Very good points
@eedd sdsd I have never known Christian women to be hurt by a guy not asking her out very fast. Maybe that is because I just haven't encountered them, or perhaps you are misinformed... I think it is the former, despite your assertion that you know women more than women do. However, I have known women to be very turned off by guys showing too much interest too quickly. Frankly, it causes women to see them less respectfully, I think, because it shows they are either infatuated or just not wise. Also, women want to know that a guy likes them specifically, not just their idea of them or any Christian woman at all who says yes. It is unlikely that a guy knows a girl well enough if he asks her out right away.
Notice that I said it is a turn off when guys show "too much" interest too fast. Some interest is appropriate and wise to show, but no more than you would be okay with a guy showing to your future wife. Basically, be friendly and interested in her enough as a person to get to know her and give her the chance to get to know you. If you haven't given her a chance to get to know you, she isn't going to say yes if she is wise. Anyway, these have been my midnight rambles. I hope they made sense lol
So how’s he going to find out if a girl is someone he should or shouldn’t pursue without talking to her?
@@cosmictreason2242 Talking and dating aren't the same. Be friends with her. Value women enough to talk to them even if you aren't getting a romantic partnership out of it. Most girls I know want to be friends with the guy in groups before ever dating them, so that we can see how well we click and how he treats people. So... talk to her by being a friend, with no strings attached. Care about her even if you don't end up dating, ya know? If you genuinely did that, with God's help, most girls would love to get to know you
👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻
My and your uncle: Douglas.
I guess I’m gonna sign myself into a hospital where they strap me into a chair 😆
love ya Doug, just can't get with the Calvinism.
In all your ways acknowledge Him & He will direct your paths. I think I'll let Him direct me on who to marry as well. Choosing a wife isn't like choosing ice cream. Ice cream can't love you back & God made all the ice cream for you to eat. If you don't care for the chosen flavor, you can toss it & choose another, no big deal. Choose the wrong wife & you'll be a sad sad man.
Amos 3:7
Surely the Lord God will do nothing, but he revealeth his secret unto his servants the prophets.
I like proverbs 5:19 :D
Doug,
You mentioned “doing God’s will”. Is it possible to be outside of God’s will? And if so, how does that jive with God’s Sovereignty? In other words, if God is sovereign, how can we operate outside of his will?
Have to disagree with you on that. The secret things can be revealed to us, to those who fear Him, and those who know not the will of God are unwise:
"Psalm 25:14The secret of the Lord is with them that fear him; and he will shew them his covenant."
“Ephesians 5:17Wherefore be ye not unwise, but understanding what the will of the Lord is.”
Is Doug sick?
(9:29) _You must marry a Christian (2 Corinthians 6:14), a Christian who would not be disobeying the Lord by marrying you (Luke 16:18), a Christian of sterling character (Proverbs 31:30), a Christian whose personality gels well with yours (Amos 3:3), and a Christian whom you find sexually attractive (Proverbs 5:19)_
Him in you, you in Him?
Jesus is The Word, John 1:1-5
The Word God spoke: Exodus 20:1
The Word God wrote: Deuteronomy 4:13
and The Word God made flesh John 1:14
Jesus is the law that hung on the cross as well as the law God wrote upon our heart. If Jesus is in you, you must get in Him. Our directions are found in Deut. 6:8-9.
Moose Tracks....definitely.
Only a short time on your channel But Jer 29:11 is for Israel Read the chapter.
It shows the mind of God towards His people.......