Most Men don't talk about it
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- Опубліковано 28 вер 2024
- / paulmessner
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#wildcamping #camping #backpacking
Thanks Paul, great video
A great and honest video Paul, thank you. Many people on these social platforms want to just make themselves look good and stand out. By doing that they make out that they don’t suffer in life. I always have to get out and go for a walk or a wild camp to give myself a reset. I even found a spot, like yours in the woods only 10 mins walk from home. I slept in my hammock and had a great night. It was just enough to reset myself. I also see a therapist and have done for a couple of years now. Again like you say “a problem shared is a problem halved” my therapy has helped me so much that I’ve even starting a degree in September in psychotherapy. Thanks again for a great vid. Keep up the good work.
Thanks Paul.
im a trustee for the Marauders mens health walking group,its good your talking about this subject we have a very good set up and regularly have 20-30 guys on our walks,ive made so many new friends and seeing everyone supporting each other is inspiring we have just returned from another successful trip to Snowdon and the positive comments on our group chat make all the planning worthwhile
Totally agree with you. The nature or my garden is the place for me to relax. Love the hammock btw. Easy to setup, adjust and then enjoy. Greetings from 🇸🇪
Best one yet Paul, and I can totally relate to what you say.
90% of the time I'm just fine, but when that 10% hits, I just need an escape, or just someone to talk to.
Luckily, I have found both, which can usually get me through the bad times.
Excellent advice about not keeping things to yourself.
I have a nightmare neighbour upstairs. Had a water leak through my ceiling cos of his washing machine. Loud music at silly o clock. That really stresses me most as it's affecting my home. Work stress is different where I think I'm my own worst enemy. I kinda get stressed hiking where it gets too high for me as I'm not great with heights but that's a problem..or a challenge that I'm trying to change. Great videos this month..nice to see the real you and great wife
Good to get out. Really helps and yeah, talk to people maybe total strangers abouty what's going on. Myself and my walking buddies solve most all the worlds problems and none of or own. Take care, good vid
When I saw you doing "pull ups", I thought; are you kidding me? 😄😄
Living under stress effects your immune system in a big way, I avoid it as much as possible.
Not difficult for a retired guy like me. 😄
nature is important for everyone from zero to 100. That is why it is so important to protect natural places and green spaces in cities. Healthy population healthier NHS. Humans have spent 99% of their existence in nature not concrete.
Superb video.
You are a natural presenter of information, thsnkyou.
👍
I’ve suffered for years with lack of sleep. I started taking magnesium. I cannot tell you enough how much they have helped me sleep. British supplements are the best I’ve found.
Same problem with me. I've tried everything, to no avail. Just can't relax, which is made worse by the fact I have ASD (autism). Someone recommended lemon balm a few weeks ago, and since taking it my sleep has improved a lot. I'll try magnesium as well! Cheers.
Chin up 😊 life is tough. Keep going and enjoy best you can 😊
fold the front edge of your hammock back when you sit on it so it doesn't push your knees up to your chin - more comfortable.
It's hard to realise in the moment , but whatever you're feeling now, will pass with time. Toxic positivity/advice- "pull yourself together" "man up", "Git Gud" without the mechanism to get to that point is at best useless, at worst lethal.
This is amazing!
Yeah. A nice chat. Thanks for that it does resonate.
I worked in a college in Donny, been doing it for many years. There came a point where I couldn't cope and blubbed myself into a near nervous breakdown. I volunteered to take an unpaid sabbatical year off, to sort myself out. When I returned for the start of the September term my boss had terminated my post. I had no job to come back to.
They did offer volunteer redundancy....but it took 5 years to stop hating the place.
Nice little chat Paul.. Glad you're good... Brave talking like that lol. Takes guts putting it out there.... All from the donkey woods. Used to make dens in there. 👍
Cheers Mick. Hope you’re well.
How do you like the unna by the way.
@@PaulMessner. I think it' suits Btitish weather well, think we spend a lot of time inside the tent in our weather and it's got so much more space than the Soulo... I like it a lot and wondering now if to keep the Soulo and just get the 10mm poles.... Definitely a good buy for me. 👍
@@twiggyescapes I got the 10mm poles and a mesh inner for mine. That should cover most of the year when I need something with a bit of strength.
Maybe adhd minus, I had problems sleeping my entire life, I’m 53 years old now, but I don’t worry anymore about it
I have adhd minus, and all the things you said could be about me
👍👍👍👍
Top 🇧🇷🇧🇷🇧🇷
Keep doing what you’re doing Paul, really enjoy the content.
I work with the public all week, that's why I go camping at the weekends. I like people, but sometimes I need a break from them.
Ditto.
The worst part about customer service is the customer
I read that as pubic at first glance 😆
Good for you i dont
I’ll second that.
Nice subject, reality check for some of us, youre definitely not alone going Down the rabbit holes😂
Keep going Paul!
👍
Great subject, Paul 👍🏼
On sleep, I’m the same as you. Usually takes me ages to drop off (despite doing all the right things). However the last 6 months, I’ve had nights, where I’ve fallen asleep within 3-5mins of hitting the pillow. Wish I knew how/why!
On the stress/depression/well being. Those times when even the things I really enjoy, seem meh, and just can’t be arsed, I’ve learnt to recognise that it’s just a wave. It will pass, and I just go with it.
Exercise helps massively. Sometimes have to force myself out walking or cycling. Then feel great for it, even if short lived. But these times are infrequent which I’m thankful for.
All the best to everyone,
Cheers
Gary B
Mental health issues aren't just a male thing, women hide it too. The suicide rates show it affects everyone. neurodiversity is an issue too. If you have multiple issues, such as ASD,ADHD and dyslexia, according to the NHS, you have a life expectancy of 54 years. People on the "spectrum" might look okay but even when they are, they are paddling like mad to keep their head above water. Talking and being outside really makes a difference. It's helping me do my bit at raising this age stat. Well done Paul.
Rocks in my path? I keep them all. With them I shall build my castle.
Nemo Nox
I like that 😃
@@PaulMessner it's served me well. I try to remember that you can't have an easy life and a strong character at the same time. The load doesn't get lighter, but your back gets stronger. If only that applied to my physical back and not my metaphorical one! 😄
Well said Paul, keep up the good work
literally had a stress breakdown at work today and walked out mid shift. camping and getting outdoors is literally keeping me alive atm, strange how you post this video at just the time i need to see it, thank you
Yeah I've walked out of many many jobs.
P45 ..
@@Makaveli19990 Try to get counselling if you can and if it didn't work, try again. All you need is a little spark to begin the recovery. Getting out is a life saver. Keep going.
@@Life-Outdoors-UK exactly what ive done, first session next week, and im literally just back from glen etive today after a night under the tarp, thank you 😁❤️
good video mate. the irony is the reason it's so hard to talk about for some is because of most, but not all, men from our past, not showing that it is ok to talk about things. there's a fine balance between being stoic and also not bottling things up. great topic mate, guys need to be more open, especially with other guys. also love time in the hammock!
Thank you for making this vid. I tried filming something similar a couple of weeks ago, but I can't face the editing as I'm worried that I'll make a hash of the subject.
I was trying to raise the awareness of men's mental health as June is men's mental health month and it's something that isn't spoken about and is overshadowed by other awareness.
Twice as many women get diagnosed with anxiety and depression than men. This is probably because men don't seek help, which is probably why ¾ of the UK suicides are men. A shocking statistic.
You are right, it's ok not to be ok, and I'd rather spend 4 hours listening to a mates problems than spending an hour at his funeral.
Keep on bringing out the great content, ATB mate, GD
Well said Paul
Having somewhere near your home to "escape" is a huge benefit. I'm lucky to have a canal full of ducks, swans, moorhens and coots ten minutes walk away, that's my escape pretty much every day.
Paul this is the most rediculous coincidence. I live in Leeds and drove up to Malham Cove yesterday for my first ever wild camping trip. The camp went great however I lost my car key, had to get a mobile key specialist out. Then an hour or so later when driving home to Leeds my car did exactly the same as yours and I finally broke down with the whole car shut down only 1.5 miles from home. Not had the best day mechanical wise then I’m catching up on your daily vlogs from June and seen your breakdown video!
Praying and meditation on Jesus Christ calms my nerves. As well as nature regularly.
Good one!
Low dose of cipralex will help 😊.. discuss it with your doctor first.
I had a meltdown @ 37 I swear it was a mid life crisis. Now in my mid 40’s and occasionally it reappears don’t really know why or how but learned to deal with it. Eventually it passes but it still annoying! Deep breath and fresh air helps. Oh I am married & 2 kids ! 🤔☺️
Be a cool dude. Stress can kill. Deal with it and be calm as possible. Good vid. Change eating habits, screen viewing things like that keep you wound.
Another wonderful video, Paul. Thanks.❤
Got me in tears.
Thank you.
Love you for what you are as a person in front of the camera.
Not only the outdoors stuff.
Hope you have a lot of fun with your challenge. 😊
Anti depressants just dull you down to becoming a zombie, since I came off them my stress levels rocketed and it's been hard, but the stress and anxiety is pushing me to change my life, which would never of happened if I was still on the meds.
We are all living at a time when we are having to rely on things and situations that we have little control over. While that has always been the case to some degree, almost everything we rely on today, food, transportation, social and professional communication, housing etc, depends on other people who may or may not have any interest in us personally. I think we underestimate how much that leads to chronic stress. Just 40 yrs ago, we knew the car mechanic, the police, we knew the grocer, we knew our doctor, we knew our neighbors etc. Most importantly we knew what we were doing and why. I don't see that anymore.
Poor sleep eventually catches up with me, and I find myself dozing off watching television sometimes. That is proper sleep, I can't fight it, I'm out like a light, even if it's only for a short nap. A good sleep is rare for me. Lots of little stressors, like many other people, what if's, the doom spiral.
You have covered some great topics this month.
You require to me more or less in Tents!
Thanks for talking about this. I’m crap at talking about my mental wellbeing and my problems - I definitely handle stress a lot differently to when I was a younger guy
I'm off work at the moment, like the old Queen and Bowie song goes, "Under Pressure"! People need to understand men pop off and tell no-one
, man up is crap! Walking in the shoes of another for a mile comes to mind,things have only started to change due to me humbling myself and talking to others! Great vid brv. Depression is nature's way of telling you are not happy or coping. And change needs to happen.
Cheers Paul. The few people I can talk to think I'm mental anyway to start with. But, they understand. We sometimes don't rate our mates enough.
Its the so called sane that are mentall
Excellent video Paul. It is amazing what getting out in nature can do for our well-being. Thanks for sharing.
Yes.
Very well articulated. Thanks for sharing.
Great vid Paul.... I had a mini meltdown last month. Triggered by a bad neighbour hacking my hedge and throwing the debris into my garden. That was the closest i've been to the 'red mist' in many years. A couple of other issues (work and wifes health) were boiling along and only needed an incident like that to burst me. A big walk and a chat to Rock2Recovery sorted me out. Keep talking pal🏆👌
A1
So how has the post a day lifted your followers?
It’s on track to be double the amount I got in April and May but obviously I’ve lost a few as this style is not what everyone signed up for. Thats nor why I’m doing it though. I just want something more varied than just camping and gear.
@@PaulMessner the whole point is doing publishing what makes you happy. If you just did gear, you would be bored, your audience would get bored. The thing is you have got to the size where people are watching for you
If you are in top physical shape stress doesn't affect you and you can plow right through it.
Great video Paul this will help lots of people suffering to hopefully get out in the fresh air and just chill , I especially love forest walks the trees have a calming effect 👍
Just wanted to say this was beautifully done! Thanks Paul… I mean.. we all know.. but the way you touched the subject.. real nice! Made my day man!
Absolutely agree mate, I genuinely felt myself chilling out more as the video went on, almost like he was 'talking me down' without even meaning to. He's a great bloke.
Anytime I feel off, sleep, exercise and diet are off.
Hammock makes me think you should do a Hammock tent video? And maybe 1 of the tree tents that are up in the air?
I can see the difference in you. I truly enjoy watching your daily vids. I know it's tough, but keep it up!
Work on relaxing skills. Stress happens and tries to eat you with out needing any help.
Breathing exercises, muscle relaxation techniques and giving my 'soul' some peace is what works for me.
Everybody needs to learn what does it for them!
Appreciate your talking about this topic!
9:21 gave me a good chuckle thank you!
It is very true that a walk outside, especially in nature, can lower the stress levels a lot. I love getting out there and pitch up my hammock and just relax. You realise that life is so much more than what is stressing you out.
😂😅😂😂
Family going too a town day advent ,only20 min drive, but I'm taking the 2.5 hour treck (long way) just to reset.
Ps I'm a carpenter, quite creative and can never switch of to sleep .the only time I can switch of is in a woods in my
Hammock
Thanks for sharing this Paul....too many blokes don't talk about it. I see it in my male coworkers a lot.
Your right Paul, it is something we all have to deal with but as a man it is hard to open up and discuss it. I myself have been showing signs of stress which is affecting my physical health even though I don’t actually feel stressed but I have got lots of small stressful things going on. I need to make more time to get outdoors on a regular basis. I’ve been struggling to get out for too long! Thanks for talking about it 🙏
legend as always buddy
I've got complex ptsd and deal with it my way,i've always said if things are bad in life get out into the middle of nowhere and sit and listen to natures music.
Trust me it's works like magic..
When i got my very first DD Nest Hammock i watched countless videos on how to use tree huggers,angle of inclination of support cords,how to access/egress the hammock etc etc and fellt i was an expert and really chuffed to be able to show Mrs Twiglet how to get in to it.I pulled the back edge taut against my buttocks,eased myself gently in to the position building up to actually sitting down in it,suddenly accelerated in to a wild uncontrolled back swing,flipped over backwards and landed with a dull thud on the lawn.I pretended it was done for the attention seeking potential,wasn't believed and we both laughed for ages afterwards.
Getting outdoors is a great healer Fresh air and open space to get away and have some breathing room amazing effect
There is unfortunately always someone worse off but hopefully when they see simple ways to help distract their minds for even a short time, it can only be a good way to start
Regards to your open discussion and honesty
Jeff
People underestimate the power of caffeine over mood and psychological health. They learn about it only when they crash, like all drugs.
This is very true
And real men eat Quiche...
I tick that box then 😂
One thing that most men don't talk about is that most men don't talk about most men that don't talk about it because most men don't like talking about it.By not talking about it most men that don't like talking about it are not talking about it for that very reason - so by not talking about it it doesn't get talked about by most men that don't talk about it.Men,we need to talk.About it.
easy for you to say 😂
@@PaulMessner ...having said that it's probably easier for me to say that it's easy for you to say easy for you to say than it actually is easy for you to say easy for you to say.Having said that,it probably is easy for you to say easy for you to say.That's why i find camping so challenging sometimes,ok it is easy for me to say that it's easy for you to say easy for you to say.Wish i hadn't started now, which is easy foe me to say.
I do, that’s why I don’t get on with most men, most men and women have been really well conditioned
Stress management is important. It’s a good life skill to be able to keep track of how much of it you have in your life … and what you are doing about it. I’ve found a lot of it is being brave enough to set healthy boundaries. Walking away from an unhealthy stressor is easily worth 10 mmHG of blood pressure reduction.
Thanks Paul, it's been a tough week, and your message really hits the spot. As always, great videos, keep looking after you and yours!
Please if anyone needs help , reach out to family or friends... if you have no-one then use a stranger in a pub , cafe , top deck of a bus... you can call the Samaritans. Someone is always ready to listen. You just have to reach out... Be it stress or depression, talking about it really could save your life.... Take care out there.
I've always liked the fact that you're talking about this stuff. It's important that we do. Life can be a absolute shit at times, but if we talk or if we do stuff like get out into a little bit of nature, it can help.
I think the 4 walls starts to feel lilke they're closing in on us when we're stressed, getting out is vital.
I thought this was an outdoors channel.
Some of us do 😊
I am beginning to feel like a quack, having you laying down and telling us your issues! That will be 100 pounds please!😂 Anyway Paul, I am glad you can be so honest and I agree that we all need to talk about our issues. I was a trained counselor in the military for 4 years during one of my tours and I know it helps to get things off our chests when we need to. In the military, we are taught to compartmentalize our feels in order to get on with the mission, but eventually we have to open that Pandora’s box and sort through it all. It can be painful, but it has to be done. I didn’t even know I had PTSD from combat until later in my career and boy, it manifests itself in weird ways if you don’t do what you just did! Talk it out a bit. 😊
I’ve been really enjoying these films Paul, thank you.
They may not be the “big hitters” but they are useful and inspiring.
The kit reviews will always pay your bills but the “others” are the ones that will help, inspire, guide and will be more memorable in the long run.
The one constant in life is change.
I hope your Sister is ok.
Best wishes, Jiffy 👍🏻
Nice video and important points - well said 😎
Cheers Paul. Definitely hits home. All the best!
Thankyou paul i needed this ive got anxietys running through me at the minute hopefully gonna get out again soon❤, thanks again for spreading a positive message and im so so glad you have adopted the mindset of talking and stuff 😊
This is a great video Paul. Thanks for posting this one
This has been your best video so far.
I never 'switch-on', so very little if anything bothers me anymore (except the in-laws).
Well said Paul.
Did I inspire this with my message yesterday? 😂😂😂
If stress made me healthy , I would live forever . You never know what the person next to you is going through . 🫶❤️🐾